[speaker001:] Okay. Well, Carolyn, the, uh, one of the main things I'd like, like to know is, uh, how do you feel about the, knowing about the environment of a nursing home before you would send someone there to live and so forth.
[speaker002:] Well.
[speaker001:] What do you think would be required, and so forth?
[speaker002:] Uh, I'll tell you, I, I watched what went on, um, with the TWENTY TWENTY show, I don't know if you saw that a few days ago [child talking] that, that talked about nursing homes, and actually they specifically talked about some in the area where I am, here in Texas, and
[speaker001:] Oh, you knew of the [child talking] homes, then.
[speaker002:] Pardon?
[speaker001:] You knew of the homes themselves?
[speaker002:] Well, I, no, I'm not familiar with those homes per se
[speaker001:] Uh-huh [child talking].
[speaker002:] but, um, they were in the area where I live
[speaker001:] Oh, okay.
[speaker002:] uh, and it was really revealing to see some of the, you know, the things that go on, I guess, in some of these homes, so I would definitely, [child talking] you know, want to really check things out and, uh, [child talking] go, I guess that the big thing would be once you got someone in a home like that, to, to make sure that you went daily, you know
[speaker001:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] and made sure that they were cared for, and,
[speaker001:] Well, from your point of view, [talking] how would you feel about actually sending someone that, [child talking] that's, you know, means something to you to one of those homes. I realize that you indicated you wanted to check out as much as you can about it
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] [Child talking] and, of course, that makes sense, [talking] but how do you think they would feel, I should say, about moving from where they have lived most of their life into a whole new, new home situation?
[speaker002:] Well, actually, I have that kind of situation, because my mother lives with me, and she's
[speaker001:] Uh-huh.
[speaker002:] eighty-seven
[speaker001:] Oh, okay.
[speaker002:] and, uh, from the time that we were tiny, she said, you know, I want you to promise that you'll never put me in a rest home.
[speaker001:] Uh-huh.
[speaker002:] So I know how she feels about it. You know, if I, uh
[speaker001:] Yes.
[speaker002:] if I ever had to put her there, I think, uh, it would be probably when I just could not handle it any more, you know, if I
[speaker001:] Uh-huh.
[speaker002:] she got to the point where she was totally bedridden, and, and I mean, I just didn't have the skills or the strength to lift her or whatever it needed, I think that would be the,
[speaker001:] Well, how do you find that your, your personal relationship is with her, know that you're both together all the time and you are having to do a lot more for her than normal? Does that, does that cause any problems between the two of you?
[speaker002:] Uh, I wouldn't say any more than usual.
[speaker001:] Uh-huh. Is she,
[speaker002:] I think it's very hard for her, um, to be waited upon, so to speak, I mean, I think it's hard for her to have that role of not being able to do as much as she used to.
[speaker001:] It's hard to accept the fact that you're unable to pursue life, [throat clearing] at the level that you did before, isn't it?
[speaker002:] Yeah, I think that's very true.
[speaker001:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Um, on the other hand, it takes on almost a, a switch of a mother child relationship.
[speaker001:] It is different.
[speaker002:] Uh.
[speaker001:] I had that almost similar situation. My mother lives in an apartment with my sister
[speaker002:] Oh.
[speaker001:] and, uh, so I, except for the three or four months this summer, that's the only time I ever spent with my mother, and, of course, since I see her only once or twice a year, I was just thrilled
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] to have her here with me, and I spent every minute I could to be with her and, uh, cooking foods for her, you know, just to make her, her life as though she were on vacation.
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] But somehow another, it, that doesn't work between my mom and my sister, and they, they find they, they are, in speaking they, I don't know, my mother feels uncomfortable around my sister, and my sister's uncomfortable because her mother's there [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] and I guess it's just because they're there all the time.
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[speaker001:] So it's, it puts, has put pressure on both of them from that point of view. So that's, that's kind of bad news. And by the same token, my wife's mother is now moved into a nursing home, [coughing] and after all she has been a farmer's wife [NOISE] for sixty years
[speaker002:] Um.
[speaker001:] and now all of a sudden she's had to move off of her farm, into another home where the environment is totally different.
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] She's relatively happy, but she doesn't like the food.
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER].
[speaker001:] And when she [LAUGHTER] complains about the food
[speaker002:] Huh.
[speaker001:] then they kind of get angry with her.
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] So, that's another one of those things you have to solve.
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[speaker001:] [LAUGHTER].
[speaker002:] Well, that's got to be a big adjustment for someone that's, as you say, lived on a farm for sixty years, and then go to something like that.
[speaker001:] Yeah, after all, their, their life is so totally different because in those early days, the food, they had to make it from scratch, so to speak.
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] I mean, you raised your own chickens, and you killed your own hogs, I suppose, and then they
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[speaker001:] they had to store the meat in, uh, I don't want to say barns, but they had regular little places they, they would hang it, you know
[speaker002:] Uh-huh.
[speaker001:] to cure it and so forth. And, and now, all of a sudden, it, uh, comes in differently, [LAUGHTER] it tastes differently.
[speaker002:] That's right.
[speaker001:] [LAUGHTER].
[speaker002:] Yeah.