[speaker001:] yeah Jim uh so uh how many children do you have and what are their ages
[speaker002:] uh we have two they're going to be two and four years old in April
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] and that's after uh twenty one years of marriage so so we we've had quite an experience over the last four years of readjusting our time in terms of spending with the kids how about yourself Frank
[speaker001:] oh is that right wow I imagine we have uh four children but they're all grown and out of the house now but we still uh spend a a lot of time together really it's a it's a close family uh we have one daughter that's going to college uh in Boston and uh we don't see uh you know an awful lot of her every couple of weeks uh we manage to get together maybe three weeks
[speaker002:] um-hum
[speaker001:] and I've got uh one son that lives uh about ten miles north of us and a couple other sons that live uh about an hour away a piece they they live in the same basically in the same area about an hour away from us
[speaker002:] um-hum
[speaker001:] but I would say that every uh couple of weeks uh we're together with one of the you know one of the kids sometimes we have uh family get togethers probably every oh couple of months
[speaker002:] um-hum
[speaker001:] so it's kind of a different situation are you do you have a boy and a girl two boys two girls
[speaker002:] two girls yeah yeah and my wife and I are both from Saint Louis and we've been in New Jersey now for uh eleven years
[speaker001:] two girls uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh
[speaker002:] so we've been away for a long time and when it was just the two of us we'd go back about every year but now that we have the two girls we try to get back twice a year
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] because we both grew up with uh family all around us and weekend with the cousins and uh both of our families have uh we have siblings that have lots of children so
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] we miss that environment but and I think partly because of that because our family's a thousand miles away
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] we might even overcompensate
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] we uh pretty much uh between between that thousand mile distance from uh relatives and the fact that we had uh uh eighteen years together
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] married life uh before our daughters were born and uh we we pretty much it it seems like our whole life is devoted to the girls I mean from waking until uh till night time we we literally have an hour and a half to ourselves every night
[speaker001:] I I know what you  no uh does your wife work or not
[speaker002:] no she stays at home uh and
[speaker001:] okay that's good uh my son uh one of my sons I should say that uh had been married for nine years just had a a uh daughter uh back in July last July and you know they were getting pretty set in their ways after nine years and uh it was quite a readjustment for them so I imagine after uh eighteen years it really was a a a an adjustment in your lives
[speaker002:] um-hum  it wasn't it wasn't um uh partly because we had all that time together we're ready to focus on a family so and of uh course the changing economy you know helps focus on the the home life also
[speaker001:] um-hum um-hum
[speaker002:] um I mean our lifestyle changed drastically we went from two incomes and no children so we had Caribbean vacations and new cars and expensive cars down to
[speaker001:] um right
[speaker002:] one income two children and uh the total uncertainty of the job market now so we we pretty much stay at home
[speaker001:] right uh-huh
[speaker002:] focus we we do have our older daughter in a preschool a Montessori and that's quite expensive and
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] in fact my wife just joined the uh was just elected last night to the board of the school
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] so she's spending quite a bit of time in fact she's on the other line right now doing school board talk
[speaker001:] oh is that right huh
[speaker002:] so it it seems like even our leisure time it's been focused more centered around the kids
[speaker001:] what do what do you find is the trend amongst families in your observation for how they spend their time together what activities they're doing and how they spend the time do you think they have more or less or what
[speaker002:] uh it seems to me uh that families are spending more fractional time together
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] that maybe one parent will go off with one child and another parent will go off with the other children
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] um rather than and focusing more on the children's activities rather than family activities and
[speaker001:] uh-huh I think with so with so many parents working both husband and wife that it's difficult to find time for everybody to be together
[speaker002:] yes and partly because of that working phenomena then the kids end up getting their lives scheduled with ballet and football and soccer I mean we we live in an area that uh soccer and football is just taking off phenomenally
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] uh we we have terrible problems with scheduling soccer fields and finding enough land to even to build new football fields that they need
[speaker001:] right
[speaker002:] and part of that phenomena is the dual working household and I think
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] rather than spending the time in the evening with family activities