[speaker001:] hi Maureen
[speaker002:] hi
[speaker001:] uh we are supposed to be talking about children and spending time with them today neither one of us have any children but it might be interesting if we talked about what we thought we would do if we had children or perhaps you know what some of our friends do and what we approve or do not approve of
[speaker002:] yeah
[speaker001:] uh do you have nieces and nephews or anything
[speaker002:] no unfortunately my husband and I are both only children now we do have like some cousins that are we're kind of close to and sometimes we see the cousins' children
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] you know that's going to be the closest nieces and nephews that we can come up with is our cousins kids they do not live close to us but uh uh as a matter of fact we were going to ask uh his one cousin to try to make plans to have her uh kids come maybe visit this way for a few days and of course you know things sometime you get to be the uh the tourist folks and we will take them to Six Flags take them to Wet N Wild I mean they may not be real quality time but
[speaker001:] it will be fun though
[speaker002:] yeah it will be a real treat for them you know to kind of come and do that because they live in East Texas so they will be something real out of the norm
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] and I used to uh used to have a neighbor in one apartment complex I lived in and she had at the time her kids were like eleven and nine and five and I used to spend a lot of time with her and her kids we used to go to the pool all the time it was an apartment complex so we used to the pool and you know just kind of play around and do uh water games and you know uh have picnics out there that kind of stuff that was our normal thing we also uh she had gotten one of those uh laser disc players and we used to get uh some movies which is kind of hard with kids sometimes to you know
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] get some movies that are enjoyable for the kids and not always a strict Disney thing you know when you get eleven and nine year olds they want something a little more active than a cartoon
[speaker001:] I'm sure try Milo and Otis
[speaker002:] Milo and Otis what is that with the animals like the dogs
[speaker001:] uh-huh the dog and the cat
[speaker002:] I have seen bits of that like on uh cable or something picked it up I think somebody was showing it recently
[speaker001:] uh-huh it's really good my husband and I rented it and as a matter of fact we kind of like shows like Bambi and everything sometimes we will go to this theater and we are the only adults you know and we spend money but Milo and Otis is good and I think any the whole family would enjoy that
[speaker002:] um that sounds cute well we had one silly movie that we used to watch a lot because they were kind of expensive when she got that player uh we did not have too many movies we used to watch Airplane over and over and over again I mean have you ever seen that movie
[speaker001:] yes
[speaker002:] it's real silly
[speaker001:] yes
[speaker002:] but um and it's it's fairly clean there was only one little section of it that they probably edited for TV but uh we used to watch that a lot I mean that was just real kind of flap stick kind of fun stuff we used to watch that with her kids
[speaker001:] probably some of that went over their heads anyway
[speaker002:] some
[speaker001:] you know
[speaker002:] you know there uh her kids I remember one summer cried all summer long they wanted to go to Six Flags you know and they see these ads on TV uh Six Flags looks wonderful and we took them there and then they were too scared to get on the rides
[speaker001:] oh so you got to walk around and watch everything
[speaker002:] they wouldn't get on any of the rides even if they were you know tall enough they did not want to get on any rides and they cried all summer long when are you going to take us to Six Flags I want to go to Six Flags you know they kind of chickened out
[speaker001:] well I was noticing I have my husband has a nephew
[speaker002:] uh-huh
[speaker001:] and uh I I would say that his mother is probably like one of the perfect mothers she it's just one of those kind of deals that she spends a lot of time with him she listens to what he has to say and he is turning out he is thirteen he is turning out to be a really good kid
[speaker002:] uh-huh
[speaker001:] and I think uh whatever she has done you know she has done it right but I think it takes and awful lot of time and effort to raise kids too
[speaker002:] uh-huh uh-huh
[speaker001:] you know I watch our neighbors and everything they do is child related
[speaker002:] hum
[speaker001:] uh it's like their whole social lives kind of flow around where they are taking the kids and what they are doing with the kids
[speaker002:] uh-huh
[speaker001:] um which may be part of the reason we never had kids
[speaker002:] oh
[speaker001:] but they are time consuming I it appears to me
[speaker002:] well you know one thing that that you know I kind of say we have only been married a couple of years but um you know I think so many times in the past you know like even forty fifty years ago I mean it was just expected or kind of pushed upon people you get married and you have kids
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] whether or not there was something that inside you really wanted to do and I I like it now that people make the decision you know okay I am going to be married and then yes or no whether I have children it's not so much a society dictating to you do this you know it's everybody is supposed to get married and have kids if you do not want kids fine do not have them
[speaker001:] right people are beginning to where they do not view you as such a social pariah anymore
[speaker002:] yeah
[speaker001:] but uh well you still get you know particularly if you are around a bunch of people with kids they still tend to look at you a little strangely if you do not have them but I am running into more and more people who have opted not to have kids
[speaker002:] uh-huh
[speaker001:] so I do not feel quite so bad
[speaker002:] yeah I mean uh you hear people well there are some people that marry later and then they are very set in their ways and there are activities that they do and well I really do not want to make that sacrifice I have you know been single all these years and or you know we have been married and we have all of our activities and I do not want to change my whole life
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] or I came from a family that I had a very bad childhood and I do not know that right now I could have children and and cope with it I have too many bad feelings with my own childhood and maybe I will turn out to be you know abusive like my mother was
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] so they say you know I I do not feel that I want to do that which is fine you know I I think that's a wonderful decision on their part if that's how they truly feel
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] not you know everybody saying when are you going to have kids it's none of your business
[speaker001:] that's right
[speaker002:] it's my option to do that you know you do not just have ten kids because you know you are supposed to somehow as of the old days
[speaker001:] right or you do not know any better or there's nothing available
[speaker002:] yeah my mom was from a family of of ten and she was the youngest and her dad was like sixty when she was born and she said you know so there was hardly anything from her father
[speaker001:] oh my gosh
[speaker002:] there was like twenty years between her father and her mother her father was sixty and her mother was forty so you know it did not make the best situation for her you know to have uh you know good family kind of situation there she had brothers and sisters that kind of like pushed her around a lot because they were so much older
[speaker001:] uh-huh
[speaker002:] yea h it was not the best situation but yeah
[speaker001:] who yeah plus when they are that old you know it's not as though they are going to go out and rough and tumble with the kids like a younger parent would
[speaker002:] right right although I mean we are we are in our late thirties now my husband and I and we are still considering it and you know I think that I have kind of done the right thing I mean I have I was just really shocked to have a cousin who is a bit younger than I and she was one of these types out of high school you know