[speaker001:] um at what age did your father enter the nursing home
[speaker002:] um he was around seventy nine I believe
[speaker001:] gosh
[speaker002:] and um but it's a big decision to make but um you know people say because one day they're they look like they're doing real well and the next they're just you know awful in diapers and the whole bit
[speaker001:] right
[speaker002:] and um uh they can be mentally sane one day and just look perfectly normal and then the next day they're just are weeks off of off of it and until you take care of a person personally there were three my mom and I and our kids would help us some and it was just awful to take care of a person that is that way
[speaker001:] I tell you I worked in home health care with the elderly um for a while and uh while I was in college and it was a very I mean I enjoyed my job but I I worked a
[speaker002:] uh uh very strenuous
[speaker001:] yes three days on and four days off is what my schedule was and
[speaker002:] um-hum um-hum
[speaker001:] and um I'm a compassionate person and uh physically strong but when I got off my three day shift I mean you know you couldn't have kept me there another minute I just had to go
[speaker002:] um-hum  right yes but I don't know how the the uh people at the nursing homes handle it day in and day out truthfully because of the physical strain uh as well as uh you know emotionally well they they have to build walls emotionally but
[speaker001:] it um-hum I I think that's almost necessary I and it's interesting that compassion has got to be a required quality but then they yet they have to have the ability to isolate themselves from too much too much compassion
[speaker002:] yeah oh yeah um-hum from the situation um-hum
[speaker001:] um
[speaker002:] was very difficult for me at times as the as the daughter to you know to a special person
[speaker001:] I could imagine oh of course uh uh
[speaker002:] but anyway anyway he he um the the requirements for the nursing home were first of all well of course the cleanliness and the care you know what type of care do they need it depends if you you know if you need the bed total bed care
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] or if he could if they could be up and around it all depends on the type of nursing home they have the ones where they live in apartments even and just get their meals and care there you know that way so that that's one of the I mean it just depends on the patients
[speaker001:] that's true and I think it would be I would think it would be helpful to the patient to um be housed with uh patients with similar uh had you know similar problems
[speaker002:] right right
[speaker001:] if you will you know excuse the word just so that they could relate to one another and and wouldn't you know be
[speaker002:] um-hum except bless their hearts they're usually so senile they don't really do anything love each other and and all they do is fight with each other that was I found in my father you know all those old people would just fight with you it was a riot
[speaker001:] I know I I tell you I was at an uh convalescent home last week um a three hundred and twenty five patient convalescent home
[speaker002:] um-hum
[speaker001:] and I could not believe how feisty these people were I had never I had never been in a group atmosphere when I was in home health care it was a one-on-one ratio
[speaker002:] uh-huh um-hum
[speaker001:] and these folks were you know about to go to the mat over TV stations that they had chosen or uh arguing over whether or not their meals were cooked enough and and as if the another patient could have done something about it
[speaker002:] right right right
[speaker001:] and I find that psychologically very interesting because I I feel from my perspective that it would be a a manifestation of their own frustration
[speaker002:] yeah
[speaker001:] and uh I'm going to ignore that click if you heard it uh
[speaker002:] oh that's fine yeah
[speaker001:] and and that um would would I don't know that that frustration would be preventable in  even in the one-on-one ratio I worked in my patients were very frustrated and very upset
[speaker002:] uh-huh it is for them bless their hearts it is very frustrating but but by the same token it's it's the one my father was in was wonderful care
[speaker001:] oh that I'm sure that was a load off your mind
[speaker002:] and uh yeah it is and uh just knowing they're daily taken care of as far as uh physically and uh you know they they kept him clean and they kept him and uh kept up with his medicine and all it's a big thing
[speaker001:] um-hum what um do they did you find um that they offered sufficient dietary maintenance that would be something I would
[speaker002:] it was pretty good it was nothing to write home about it's typical you know it's typical um
[speaker001:] would uh
[speaker002:] oh what do you want to say you know um commercial you know and uh it was it was fine they had but they had a recreation director that was pretty good there and she made sure they had their little get togethers and parties most everyday she had something going on for them
[speaker001:] um-hum
[speaker002:] either ceramics or they did ceramics which I never thought my dad would do but he did a little bit of it