[Skonev:] and I thought, right, this bloke's a wanker
[speaker002:] You move down please And you said no because there's no room and Sonia goes [shouting] shut up, where d'you want us to go? []. Right, the block shuts up right old Army General, line up and get in a single line we can maximise the space if you get in that leg room of about one millimetre or lie down on people's laps and then we can build or may be even lie down on The worst thing is right is old women trying to get on the train We can't, there's no room. I was just asking Old women Oh look, there's a fucking camera out there walking sticks and they've got like Parkinsons Disease knocking everyone out the way camera these two ladies and this old biddy, she's right, she always gets on the train first and all the businessmen and all the kids hat her that that one with the black hat? No, she gets on, she's always there in the morning. She gets her friend and they sort of lock arms and sort of do a rugby scrum and they knock everybody out the way. And one day and this businessman goes, do you mind, stupid cow, cos she always they just erm run and no matter and one day we we did a rugby scrum and we rammed them out the way and they went flying. It was really funny and we got The worst is the worst is when you're on a carriage which is packed with J F S kids cos they're like, they're just lying down and they dragged two of them in and there's about ten people in the other side of the carriage in about this much space and there's like two J F S kids lying on the floor in the middle of the carriage we get on the train at, most of them get on at Elstree luckily so what we do is we open the doors and they're always crowding up the bit where the door is and they say excuse me may I get on please? And th and then they let all their friends get on first There's one at Kentish Town, a businessman who smokes big fat cigars like this and he's half finished them and he throws them on the train and when the doors open no-one clears out the way and he steps on and he's such as bastard they go, bloody kids, pushing, all the but they're the ones who always they think they think they like And the things is, they always laugh, they're always laughing when they get on the train D'you know what I hate crowd all the seats yeah and you can hear them and they're like so loud and high-pitched and then when they laugh and this woman's like saying, I've saved you bloody cow and they're always shouting. D'you remember that time that that fat boy said, save your seat you bloody cow, sit in it. She said no and they start having a fight. Stupid. slob right in front of the doors and like you're trying to get off the train, d'you mind yeah, the doors come apart, the doors come apart, and they're still stuck there and like there's a puddle of spit and you just sort of push past them and the bloke goes don't care and I hate businessmen and he's carrying his briefcase and he decides he wants to get a paper right and he's absolutely massive really hate is when you're on a crowded train and you're all getting on the train and someone else who's getting off lights up a cigarette and They all s they stand there at the door going lighter as if it matters they have to get off the train with a cigarette in their mouth or they're uncool, some shit like this The worst paper is The Times No,n or The Financial Times. They go and they're holding it up here and I got, I got a bit and he goes and also him and this lady they sit there and they start murmuring about you such a bloody annoying bastard and if you talk they stare at you like this she never smiles. I've seen her laugh but I think she's taking the piss. what d'you wanna do after school like that and you step on their foot by mistake and they the trombone and they think the trombone shouldn't be there and this man says, look, picks up the trombone and puts it outside the train. He said look you don't need to take that to school, it's just taking up space which I could stand in. Fuck you you old bugger. He's such a tosser. he thinks that he can buy I could buy this standing space because I'm a businessman and I've got lots of money. Fucking tosser.
[Skonev:] Mom, mom... [sigh] reasonably hold on a second, just gotta put this on
[speaker002:] [whispering] really nasty []
[Skonev:] I hate this subject, especially with a teacher who doesn't know anything about it. every time is just compare sources which bores me stupid. Bastard teacher... he's the one that reacts and freaks and pisses you off... [humming] don't know. What's that under my foot? [whispering] the accused [] Okay... Maybe. No no no shut up. Cos I don't want to, it's boring.... Mom? a nice time after school cleaning the desks.
[speaker002:] Mhm?
[Skonev:] Rupert's having a nice time after school cleaning the desks. No. Being sarcastic mother, you know what a he is. Yeah, well teachers are all dicks so [sigh] they don't know how to discipline anyone. They're all thick. Pardon?
[speaker002:] Barbara
[Skonev:] Oh, Barbara, silly cow. Bertie Wooster and the resourceful Jeeves Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry find themselves back in New York in the first new episode of the new and final series of Jeeves and Wooster beginning on I T V this week. What time, what day is it on? Writer Clive has created the plot lines by interviewing What? Boring as hell I mean, it's not a boring programme but you'd find it boring, believe me. What kind of computer does he want?
[speaker002:] He wants an expensive computer
[Skonev:] What's it called? The B B C shit? I mean [sigh] bollocks shit or something
[speaker002:] He just wants a better one than they've got now but a very basic
[Skonev:] No he wants a decent computer. He doesn't want a P C bollocks
[speaker002:] I said that's what he's got
[Skonev:] I bet he wants a bollocks P C. Bollocks. Well why doesn't she buy him a computer? Well bollocks. Look, if she can send him to Westminster or Eton she's got money. Yeah, well, then I don't see why he his father can't pay for it. Well why can't his father pay for a computer? [humming] [humming] I'm not doing as much homework but bloody hard at school which Roland won't appreciate, which really pisses me off cos I don't Well, sometimes, I mean, yes at the moment but we're working very hard at s Well cos we're working much harder in school at the moment and also the exams are coming up Bollocks. one, Arsenal three, Arsenal two, Leeds United two, Leeds United two, Arsenal three, Arsenal three, Nottingham Forest nil, Ipswich two, Arsenal four, Arsenal one, Tottenham Hotspur nil. Fuck you. Got t I'm keeping it. I just wanna cut the picture of Kim Basinger off the front page. Well, just a couple f pages out of it. [humming]. Mom you know the quality of this sound recording thing well it's not very good. I don't know how they expect to get anything out of it. It's very bad... [whistling] I'm reading. No Wh why don't you just go out? You'll feel better. Believe me, I feel like that every morning and I'm never sick. Yeah, well I do, believe me, I feel very s Mom, I gag on the way t Who's Laura? Have you heard of someone called Laura? She's a Hollywood gossip. what? This one. Sh what this one? No, it's not made up, I've seen her before on T V in a minute. that's the life [whistling] [humming]. Ever seen the film called A Man For All Seasons?... Is it good? Is it any good? Sir Thomas Moore [humming] [whistling] Look mom, the pick of satellite films mom, I mean three of them only get two stars. Shows you what a load of crap they have on satellite. Yes, one second. One, sorry I wanna read this, I'll be b I promise I'll be there in a minute. I'll just quickly read what I want to [whistling]... Okay [humming]. I said I would I'm g No, taking it just from him just cos he's an old sod... come too often. Here. Is coming? Who? I'll be back after set the table? Well, I didn't know he'd gone did I? [whistling] [singing] mother fucking right and my fucking [] London, Europe, England, the world is a complete prat he he he. I recorded that Caelia
[Caelia:] Be quiet
[Skonev:] That was her
[Caelia:] shut up
[Skonev:] I wasn't recording, I paused it
[Caelia:] hairy legs
[Skonev:] I wasn't practising, I was on a perfectly
[Roland:] perched up on the roof surrounded by
[Caelia:] No the garden
[Skonev:] Dad, dad, the crews will be sweeping down that side passage and then coming over and then past my window again. No, they really are, they've got the dive bombers on us next week mom, or is it this week? Oh shit. Shut up shut up. Yes. Yeah. Yes.
[Caelia:] Don't pick your toe nails
[Skonev:] I wasn't. I was at her but I wasn't Yes. Yeah well shut up
[Caelia:] shut up
[Skonev:] shut up
[Caelia:] Oh look it's
[Skonev:] shut up. Mom, they've got the Dambusters. Dad, is the Dambusters a good film?
[Roland:] It certainly is
[Skonev:] Is Dambusters a good film? It's on next week. Saturday. It's on Saturday.
[Roland:] Well we'll video it
[Skonev:] No, no, we're not videoing the Dambusters cos there's got the cup final on tomorrow.
[Roland:] We might already have
[Skonev:] We don't, we don't
[Roland:] Are you sure
[Skonev:] Yeah Yeah but we can't record it cos we'll either record the cup final and I wanna record the cup final [shouting] yes I do []
[Roland:] Alright, I don't mind
[speaker002:] We'll stay in and watch the cup final
[Skonev:] Yeah well granddad better let me. I'm not I'm watching the cup final
[Roland:] so don't worry
[Skonev:] There is. I'm pretty sure there 's
[Roland:] are over now
[Skonev:] Better let me watch it, I'm gonna watch that [whispering] []. Yeah, they were swooping, they were up on you know across there, you know across erm er opposite there's that house where th that has the garden at the bottom of ours. Well, they were perching on the erm chimneys of that one and then they've been coming they're gonna be swooping round up not actually low but above it, about fly to the bathroom then spread up, turning a circle, coming down and going past my window and land they were big crows they must have seen it land or something like that. Yeah well th cos they've been waiting up there on the thing and they've land or they've just been circ
[Caelia:] moving moving
[Skonev:] No it's not No, it's not, it just wakes them up
[Caelia:] and it just moved a bit and I went in again, I looked at the window and they moved again
[Skonev:] Well of course it's gonna move, if she says your face she might be sick cos it sees Caelia's face punishment She's Caelia, that's Caelia of course
[speaker002:] there should be boiling water
[Skonev:] [singing] here comes the man [] I don't know. Oh God, I forgot. I set the table but I forgot about the water. Oh shut up. I set the table. Oi, shut it.
[Caelia:] Dad?
[speaker002:] Now don't shout
[Skonev:] [belch]
[speaker002:] cauliflower won't take very long
[Skonev:] Sorry, I did forget mom, I swear. really nice I'm sorry for it gonna dive bomb, bird shit at the ready [whispering] [] No I won't. Caelia go away, Patrick go away. Don't, you're so sad, get lost. d'you wanna come up? Yeah. Yeah okay, bring it, leave it in here. there's a heron in our garden
[Patrick:] a heron? where?
[Skonev:] just round the side
[Patrick:] Is it dead?
[Skonev:] No, it got attacked by some crows, they bit it Yeah, it's just not working right. It don't work right. It's an old one, very old Yeah, pull the trigger my dad, my dad goes I went like this, he said don't worry it's not loaded fired, just past my dad's head
[speaker002:] what, a bullet? gun powder in it?
[Skonev:] It's a bit blocked up at the moment but yeah it would I'm getting an automatic next time I go in there. The man said he'd save me one,un unclipped they won't let me get. No, he'll get it for fifty.
[speaker002:] Next time you go
[Skonev:] Uncapped. It's uncapped you know the thing you put in banging of the guns under a hundred years, it hasn't got that in it. It's wicked. It comes with three cartridges. You know those ones you click on and then you put bullets buying an air gun
[Patrick:] Is that air gun good?
[Skonev:] Yeah, very good
[Patrick:] What's it like? is it? have you seen it?
[Skonev:] Yep yeah
[Patrick:] sure?
[Skonev:] fifteen pounds
[speaker002:] metal ball bearings yeah I would
[Skonev:] Could've done, probably shoot myself
[speaker002:] Joe's got one
[Skonev:] shoot a cat's tail off, it can shoot a cat's tail off
[speaker002:] Joe shot a pigeon
[Skonev:] I know, his head blew off exploded, his head exploded
[speaker002:] it didn't, his head went like picked it up, dropped it in the bin his head exploded
[Skonev:] Sick, I wouldn't do that
[speaker002:] I'd do that, I'd do it to a dog I'd never shoot a dog
[Skonev:] I like dogs
[speaker002:] the biggest thing I'd shoot would be a little bird
[Skonev:] I'd only shoot a little bird if it was dead, if it was like half dead, like if Joe had shot it al Mom it's Sally did you to America or I bet I've been to more schools than Australia, I've been to four schools in Australia what those things there? Shoes my schools shoes
[speaker002:] the other school blazer's a hundred pounds might as well just give you a blazer and
[Skonev:] it's cheaper now, it's forty pounds. Yeah? You'll have to go s Yeah, I know Pa dad, call me I ain't got any when we us the last two and that one exploded on me I had this and it goes and exploded all over me and went over Some things are different a silly old git isn't he? a turkey yeah, see what I do, shit. I do the opposite too hard. What do you do in America? No, cos you have examinations to you have to be
[speaker002:] Yeah, but you had to pass an examination, didn't you?
[Skonev:] Yeah, I passed. I find it I don't find it very hard bu well not all of it some of it hard, it is hard though. I don't know where it is now
[speaker002:] do you now, do you know Max?
[Skonev:] Max, yeah I know him. He's thick. He's intelligent but he's a dick head
[speaker002:] Why, what does he do?
[Skonev:] He's just thick he. Oh fuck. I gotta go. You gotta go now Pat. down the pub? I'll be down in about twenty minutes, okay? Pat, come over here in about twenty five minutes, okay?
[speaker002:] Do you know Adam?
[Skonev:] Adam Adam?
[speaker002:] Adam
[Skonev:] Do you know his name though? what does he look like? Bye Pat, come back in about twenty five minutes. [sigh]. That boy went to the same primary school as
[Roland:] I'll take your word for that
[Skonev:] That's about all I want, okay, I'm not very hungry. That's about all I want mom cos I'm not very hungry today. rush out, it's just that I'm not very hungry.
[Roland:] Caelia use your fork use your fork. Okay, one more, one more. Come on, take a piece.
[Skonev:] Shall I stop this while we're eating?
[Roland:] No no
[Skonev:] Well, I'll take the microphone off cos I'll put it like this, down here like this No Caelia, no just leave it alone. This side's nearly finished so erm, bit less than Caelia
[speaker002:] same amount
[Skonev:] I'm not very hungry I'm just not hungry
[Caelia:] didn't I?
[Roland:] careful, careful
[Caelia:] that's hot shut up
[speaker002:] d'you want erm any more
[Blake:] what stage are you on? you just switch it on again
[Skonev:] Alexander, d'you want some more Alexander
[Blake:] What?
[Skonev:] D'you want some more? Ah, yes please. don't you know it?
[speaker002:] No? No Wow
[Skonev:] Which one are you playing? How far have you got yourself? Which level have you got to? First?
[speaker002:] Yeah. I can get to erm fourth level
[Skonev:] Which one have you got to Alexander?
[Blake:] Twenty two, but that's only cos use the keys
[Skonev:] Did that go on the floor?
[speaker002:] Yeah
[Blake:] that's only cos I use the keys
[Skonev:] have your wits about you [LAUGHTER]. No. or this morning, I can't think if I remembered
[Blake:] Yeah
[Skonev:] I did
[Blake:] tape should be ready in a minute. Should be ready after we've finished our...
[Skonev:] Are you rewinding something on the video?
[speaker002:] Yeah Yeah
[Skonev:] I wondered what that noise was? Shortly after you've finished that, I really ought to take you back Jake
[Blake:] after we've finished the video
[Skonev:] Well, how long will it take?
[Blake:] Not finis, just see a little bit
[Skonev:] Is it, is the new one then?
[Blake:] Yeah
[Skonev:] The beginning?
[Blake:] right not
[Skonev:] Well he can come another day and look at it darling because I don't want you to be too late tonight, you've got all that Lego to clear up
[Blake:] Just that, just that video
[Skonev:] We have to be early tomorrow because of going up to London you see.
[Blake:] I know. Mommy?
[Skonev:] Have you seen square inch
[Blake:] Mommy, please can we just do him? please?
[Skonev:] Goldfinger?
[Blake:] Just watch Goldfinger
[Skonev:] It takes about two hours to watch it
[Blake:] Not all of it. Not two hours for all of it.
[Skonev:] Well then you'll say you don't want to stop. You can watch it until quarter past six and no longer, right?
[Blake:] Well
[Skonev:] Yes, absolutely, because I said I'd have Jake back about six at home No I did not
[Blake:] I'm sure you did
[Skonev:] Because I want to give you time to clear up
[Blake:] Did you got to pick him up or did
[Skonev:] No, his mother brought him
[Blake:] I didn't see his mother
[Skonev:] remember it's upstairs, isn't it? No cos you weren't even dressed
[Blake:] cos that's
[Skonev:] Is that beef cooked enough?
[Blake:] Mhm, yeah they're home made absolutely disgusting
[Skonev:] That's not very nice
[Blake:] absolutely disgusting
[Skonev:] [LAUGHTER] is it? Well
[Blake:] Alex?
[Skonev:] Yes, remember to close the tree house door when we go out. Just in case it rains
[Blake:] Alex?
[Antony:] Yeah?
[Blake:] You know those rice krispy things at school for pudding.
[Antony:] Yeah
[Blake:] Do you know how to make it?
[Antony:] No
[Blake:] I do
[Skonev:] Yes you do know how to make it
[Blake:] What?
[Skonev:] Those chocolate rice krispies
[Blake:] chocolate ones
[Skonev:] golden syrup
[Blake:] Mhm. Yeah. It's butter and syrup then you put condensed milk in
[Skonev:] condensed milk do they have in them?
[Blake:] Mhm
[Skonev:] I've never made them with condensed milk. Are they yummy?
[speaker002:] Mhm
[Skonev:] Is that how they make them at school darling?
[speaker002:] Yeah
[Skonev:] Do you eat them?
[speaker002:] Mhm
[Skonev:] Actually that's what affects your eczema because condensed milk
[speaker002:] What is condensed milk?
[Skonev:] It's that stuff that comes out of a tin that's very rich
[speaker002:] ugh
[Skonev:] You probably don't have it you've probably never had it.
[speaker002:] I've probably had it
[Skonev:] I used to make it for the girls when they were little
[speaker002:] Why?
[Skonev:] For puddings very occasionally
[speaker002:] Pudding? Condensed milk, wow
[Skonev:] Jake, do you want the other half?
[Antony:] Erm, I'll have a bit of it please
[Blake:] I'll have the other bit
[speaker002:] I'll have a tiny bit
[Skonev:] Come and tell me how much you'd like. Bring your plates... like that, or do you want like that?
[speaker002:] Erm, no that will be enough Yes please
[Skonev:] Does mommy make peaches, I expect she does
[Antony:] No, my nanny does
[Skonev:] Your nanny? Oh, you've got a nanny at the moment, have you?
[Antony:] Yes
[Skonev:] Nice, is she?
[Antony:] Yes
[Skonev:] Where does she come from? Is she
[Antony:] Erm she comes
[Skonev:] Local? Does she live in or just come daily?
[Antony:] She comes daily
[Skonev:] Alright? cheese or mozzarella? tomato base
[Blake:] Everybody at school says mozzarella cheese is disgusting... I take no notice of them
[Skonev:] Well I should think that's quite right. They probably, they probably get it given to you on your school pizzas
[Antony:] What cheese is disgusting?
[Skonev:] Mozzarella, the one you're eating
[Antony:] It's nice
[Blake:] I know, that's what pe people say is disgusting
[Skonev:] For some reason or another I've found a pizza that doesn't affect his skin
[Blake:] That cheese. You took these didn't you?
[Skonev:] got a bit crisp. Have you finished with that, shall I give it to the birds? Alexander? Shall I give it to the birds? Yes thank you mommy No, Alexander. Just behave nicely. I should pick it up and bite it with your teeth if it's getting too difficult. Don't worry. It's possibly the best way of getting it. Is it too hot? Is it still very hot? Is it really? on the top there... D d cos I suppose Amber has to go to school on Saturdays, doesn't she?
[Antony:] Mhm
[Skonev:] But not your other sister? Not the little one?
[Antony:] No
[Blake:] Mozzarella cheese
[Skonev:] So is Amber going to board when she comes to
[Antony:] I'm not sure. I think she is.
[Skonev:] Weekly board I suppose, like you. Do you know where the girls are going to sleep yet?
[Antony:] Oh, some of them are gonna sleep in the surgery
[Skonev:] In the surgery?
[Antony:] Yep. Dad's gonna change it into a girls dormitory.
[Skonev:] And where are they then gonna have the surgeries?
[Antony:] Don't know
[Blake:] In the sand
[Antony:] That's gonna be difficult
[Skonev:] Where's the sand then? Which is where? Is that where the big ones have the sand with the television?... I should have thought they might have had them in a separate house really but I suppose there won't be enough of them to begin with
[speaker002:] House?
[Skonev:] Do you know how many girls Amber's going to have in her form? There are three in your form. Might be only two or three... Jake, do you want some fruit or anything now? Have some fruit, have a banana or a tangerine or something.
[speaker002:] cheers
[Skonev:] Jake, what would you like? Apple? It's like Swiss cheese, swiss cheese is like that. Would you like a banana?
[Antony:] Yes please
[Skonev:] Do you want to give me your plate have it on a little one. Do you want any more cakes or anything?
[Blake:] We've got fifteen minutes to watch James Bond Alex, look at the time
[Skonev:] I didn't like it first, when I bought it I thought it was a bit crap Yeah, I first heard it
[Patrick:] Did you hear jump around?
[Skonev:] Yeah, I heard jump around. Have you heard the remix of jump around.
[Patrick:] Yeah
[Skonev:] It's real funny innit?
[Patrick:] strange
[Skonev:] jump around, jump around
[Patrick:] Did you think it was any good?
[Skonev:] Pardon?
[Patrick:] What did you think? what did you think?
[Skonev:] I thought it was crap at first. I listened to it again and I thought it was good. The first time, right, I thought this can't be house of. Put it on again, thought, hey it's sweet. Didn't like it first time [sigh]. I've read more pages. I've read pa I've read I'll show you how much I've read. I read from there, fifty six, to there, that much.
[Patrick:] Shit, that'd take me a week.
[Group Of Unknown Speakers:] [music]
[Skonev:] This is the remix. No, put on the real one. Turn it over. It's go it's you can hear the words better on that one. It's got wicked words. Right, that one. Yeah, you're right. They do make out they're black. I'm glad cos they're all black and overweight. Bastards. Specially Iced Tea, he's a monk. [yawning] got my history homework []
[Patrick:] My gran and granddad are coming round.
[Skonev:] When's that?
[Patrick:] Pardon?
[Skonev:] When?
[Patrick:] Coming round tonight, that's why I've gotta record some of this. I'm supposed to have six tapes. I've only done one. This is my second one....
[Skonev:] Mhm
[Patrick:] When you first heard this, what did you think?
[Skonev:] I thought it was shit then I thought it was good. I look that bit actually where they go
[Patrick:] What?
[Skonev:] ... [music] It's a good bit that actually pick it up, pick it up. right, is that the same size as your book?
[Patrick:] What?
[Skonev:] Pick up a book. Is that writing the same size or is yours smaller?
[Patrick:] Mine's a wee bit smaller.
[Skonev:] It's probably about one size... [music] What're you doing for Humanities?
[Patrick:] Erm, roots
[Skonev:] roots?
[Patrick:] roots
[Skonev:] About the film? It's good
[Patrick:] I've watch it already. We're just doing about blacks
[Skonev:] Have you seen a f have you heard of a film called The Unborn?
[Patrick:] I've heard it I haven't seen it
[Skonev:] Another one I wanna see is called erm, I can't remember what it's called. It's like this people th they're deep sea divers and they discover, they're stuck in the crevice, a big erm nuclear submarine and what it's for is an experiment that's gone wrong and it it's to make and instead they make an abomination you know, incredibly powerful and intelligent but really nasty you know, murderous and killer and so they take they take him to these people. They they come down there but they haven't got enough oxygen to get up and so they gotta stay on this thing with this creature. It's a bit like Alien ex and it kills them off one by one. The nastiest one I've seen is called, have you heard of a film called Brain Dead? Sick isn't it? That man with
[Patrick:] Shit reviews though man
[Skonev:] It's horrible isn't it?
[Patrick:] The reviews it got
[Skonev:] Real sick though isn't it? Is i that's the one with the picture of a man on the front isn't it? with his head in that metal thing
[Patrick:] Yeah
[Skonev:] It looks really disgusting.
[Patrick:] I wanna see it
[Skonev:] Do you? I don't wanna see it be sick No, I can't cos I've gotta do this. I can do some but. Oh shit fuck Here Pat ssh
[Patrick:] Let's do a record. What do you have to record? Do you like?
[speaker002:] Bollocks
[Group Of Unknown Speakers:] conversation
[Skonev:] yes, talk normally, just talk normally, right come on
[speaker002:] what, are you doing it now?
[Skonev:] Yes, just shut up just talk normally okay
[speaker002:] Patrick goes out with sparrow legs. Patrick is an English book who goes to school. He lives at
[Skonev:] London, England, the world
[speaker002:] it comes out at the beginning. It goes by the time and you're going, you asked for it you guys, you asked for it [LAUGHTER] so sad cos
[Skonev:] Have you seen The Running Man?
[Caelia:] Yeah
[Skonev:] It's good isn't it? It's quite good though isn't it
[Caelia:] It's not bad
[Skonev:] Do you know what it is? Do you know the story
[Caelia:] Yeah, I know like kind of thing
[Skonev:] Yeah [whispering] jump up jump up get down []
[Caelia:] Are you recording?
[Skonev:] Jump around, jump up g recording what?
[speaker002:] [whispering] []
[Caelia:] king of the crew
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER]
[Group Of Unknown Speakers:] I am a and my name is Tom people say to me your head looks like a condom. I am a punk and a and he goes and he
[Skonev:] Oh shit
[speaker002:] and he goes erm I am a con my head looks like a condom.
[Skonev:] My name is
[speaker002:] I can't help it, it's not my fault
[Skonev:] funny it's like cos they had the keyboard and that sort of rap beat it's like, and all my kebabs are in salad cream, rap it on, stack it on, that's my scene, gimme some kebab kebab gimme ages, wicked tune, I mean all these words I sang a song about and he goes shut up okay shut up
[speaker002:] After this
[Skonev:] was the best because he got wicked. I'm gonna get Howard. when he walked through the bushes
[speaker002:] Yeah
[Skonev:] Yeah I did. He came through the bushes so I in his head.
[speaker002:] He thought it was me
[Skonev:] I thought it was you and I ran off, it was you, and th and I saw you come from the bush with Howard. Oh fuck.
[Caelia:] fuck
[speaker002:] quite hard
[Skonev:] that's what they do on the front, that's what they do on the front of invasion. It's got a man smashing his head in and killing his dad. It's Ice Tea coming in killing the boy's dad. The boy ear phones has his dad being killed and his mom being raped.
[speaker002:] That's him killing his dad
[Skonev:] No it's not, it's not him, it's Ice Tea doing it I know cos that's wh you sh you have to listen to words carefully
[speaker002:] What's it saying?
[Skonev:] Well it's saying I'm gonna rape your mom and
[speaker002:] Yeah, I know I heard that
[Skonev:] I can't remember but anyway it
[speaker002:] Can I take cos I wanna listen to it
[Skonev:] No you can't, sorry Pat, I can't let you. You can ta you can borrow. I was gonna buy it but I thought no, it ain't worth it
[speaker002:] What?
[Skonev:] Yeah jump up jump and get down. Hey, I'm glad they're English cos all the bloody groups are black. I'm gonna show it to my dad. Hey Pat, come and show it to my dad
[Patrick:] What?
[Skonev:] House of pain. I wanna show him the cover the true Irish people. Where's the cover? Where did you put the cover? Jump up jump up and get.... Pat, you dr you know when you dropped the tapes on the floor, you dropped your one down there.
[Patrick:] What?
[Skonev:] Here comes the one you dig, the one's you don't. Dad look, I just wanna show you the tape I bought. House of Pain. Irish. It's an Irish rap group. Parental advisory there are explicit lyrics. Ha, that's on all my taps. I ain't got any tapes which doesn't say that on them. They all have parental advisory.
[speaker002:] What about
[Skonev:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER]
[Skonev:] I haven't done my history yet
[Roland:] You haven't done it?
[Skonev:] No
[Roland:] What have you been doing?
[Skonev:] I've been recording for this
[Roland:] that gotta be in tomorrow?
[Skonev:] Yeah, there's not that much of it left to do
[Roland:] Well, I think Patrick stay much longer than half an hour
[Skonev:] Okay, half an hour. Come on, let's go upstairs Pat Why? Basketball. Yeah, might as well. Okay. You got the one's you dig, the one you want. House of pain. You said yesterday you were going along with the Irish
[speaker002:] Did you think I was serious?
[Skonev:] No I wish I was Irish, I wish I wasn't English. Here we go, here we go. Oh, here we go. I'll come, wait a second I'm coming. Transfer. Okay. Okay, got the thing? Where did you put it? from the bath, that's good. If my mom sees you you're dead Pat.