[Ryan:] .
[Matthew:] Oh yeah.
[Ryan:] . Er Weetabix bag right,.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] she'll give you a weetabix bag.
[Ryan:] No it's it's like er everyone joined in
[Matthew:] Oh.
[Ryan:] and and I went and I.
[Matthew:] Why don't you use it then?
[Ryan:] Because cos I used to take it down there when I used to stay at her house.
[Josh:] Weetabix bag.
[Ryan:] It used to glow.
[Matthew:] Was it like a rucksack or
[Ryan:] No it was just one of those
[Matthew:] .
[Ryan:] Yeah
[Matthew:] Mm?
[Ryan:] What did we do on Friday?
[Matthew:] we don't get a Friday homework.
[Ryan:] No but what did we do for science?
[Matthew:] We did
[Ryan:] the test.
[Josh:] Oh yeah oh no.
[Ryan:] Me and Lisa have to do it.
[Matthew:] Why?
[Ryan:] Cos we weren't here on Friday.
[Matthew:] Oh.
[Ryan:] Well I was here but I came during break time.
[Matthew:] Oh I see....
[Josh:] .
[Ryan:] What have you got in your mouth?
[Josh:] Except for the bit..
[Ryan:] chewing gum.
[Josh:] . Did you watch naked?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Ryan:] Oh I saw that one.
[Josh:] Did you see him taking those shots every time.
[Ryan:] I only like the the white ones are horrible.
[Josh:] No the ones with the red and the grey.
[Ryan:] The white and the white grey and red. do they have patterns at the side?
[Matthew:] .
[Ryan:] That was horrible. I like the.
[Matthew:] Did you see him at his party.
[Ryan:] I know. I said why why would anyone.
[Josh:] And playing that pinball game.
[Ryan:] I wouldn't have enough money to go.
[Josh:] And he's just getting them in. Even though. He makes three million dollars a year, just playing basketball and that's about six hundred thousand He gets thirty million dollars from Nike every year.
[Matthew:] Oh yeah.
[Ryan:] Maybe I should become a basketball player. Yeah I know but that's a bit good though.
[Matthew:] It only cost them about five dollars to make.
[Ryan:] I know.
[Josh:] that expensive.
[Matthew:] Wouldn't you?
[Josh:] No. The highest my mum goes is forty pounds cos she doesn't think she should spend a lot of money on a pair of trainers that won't last. Cos the last time she bought me
[Matthew:] You should get some of them caterpillar boots about eighty, but they'll last for years.
[Ryan:] What you mean those big thick
[Matthew:] No not They're better than Doc Marten's.
[Josh:] Like Mark's aren't they?
[Matthew:] Yeah like Mark's.
[Ryan:] Er they're s
[Matthew:] I'm getting some of them.
[Ryan:] I think they're horrible. Er.
[Matthew:] They go good with baggy jeans.
[Josh:] Yeah but you can't lift your foot up.
[Ryan:] Yeah but can you wear them with tight leggings on?
[Matthew:] You could do.
[Ryan:] They'd look stupid.
[Matthew:] Have you seen s my sister and her big dirty boots.
[Ryan:] No I don't like boots like that
[Matthew:] No I don't either I don't like Doc Marten's
[Ryan:] I like the Doc Marten shoes cos they're hard, that's the only reason why I like them so if you're having a fight. I remember when I was
[Matthew:] Oh I remember them. Yeah. You used to kick up enough people in our school with them safari boots.
[Ryan:] play football.
[Josh:] my shoes. It was inside
[Matthew:] Yeah but what library?
[Josh:] The
[Matthew:] Oh.
[Josh:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josh:] Yeah it comes up seven.
[Ryan:] I know because it always comes up seven. It goes on to the erm.
[Matthew:] Wembley.
[Ryan:] No.
[Matthew:] Dawn lives in Wembley.
[Ryan:] No she doesn't she lives in
[Matthew:] Doesn't she?
[Ryan:] she lives in.
[Matthew:] Oh yeah.
[Josh:] . that woman.
[Ryan:] Yeah I know but I think no I don't like him cos he's so rude. He's just too rude. Yeah but she no she I know she might be. But but you know she she at least she does actually....
[Josh:] They've started to even make jokes now. You know.
[Ryan:] .
[Josh:] for you twenty five P. To anyone else, twenty five P. [LAUGHTER].
[Matthew:] Where's that?
[Ryan:] I don't know.
[Matthew:] It's a backside.
[Ryan:] Very funny. why do we need our our our our our our P E kit when we're only putting up tents?
[Matthew:] We're not we're doing athletics.
[Ryan:] We're putting up tents.
[Matthew:] We're doing athletics.
[Ryan:] I thought we were doing we're putting up tent this week and putting up a six tent next week and then
[Josh:] Why were we gonna do that?
[Ryan:] Me I know how to put up a four tent six tent.
[Matthew:] So do I.
[Ryan:] Did you go to.
[Matthew:] Twice. Twice.
[Josh:] Ha everyone else has to share. You're so disgusting.
[Matthew:] What you on about disgusting.
[Josh:] disgusting.
[Matthew:] You've got dirty minds.
[Ryan:] it still looks disgusting.
[Matthew:] the one I've got at home, the first one I ever was wicked.
[Ryan:] Is it?
[Matthew:] Yeah. Yeah.
[Josh:] What's.
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Josh:] .
[Matthew:] Sometimes.
[Ryan:] I had to sit with him yesterday and Dionne and Christopher moved..
[Josh:] .
[Ryan:] Are you taping this conversation?
[Matthew:] .
[Josh:] Yes.
[Ryan:] Are you oh no.
[Matthew:] I was gonna tell you after that's the microphone
[Josh:] See there's the there's the microphone there.
[Ryan:] Oh you burk.
[Matthew:] Oh it doesn't matter.
[Ryan:] cos I swore at Ma I swore at Martin yesterday because he was getting on my nerves like he was saying
[Matthew:] Did you listen to it yesterday?
[Ryan:] What?
[Matthew:] . listening to the mi in the mi if you plug the earphones in there you can hear at the same time what's being recorded. It's wicked.
[Josh:] It's loud it's loud....
[Ryan:] Anyway do you always tape Martin doesn't want to speak when she there because she might tape.
[Matthew:] And she said well I'm not gonna speak to you for the rest of the week then.
[Ryan:] Ah.... He's only doing it for my own good but I still don't like it. No but her boyfriend pays for it.
[Matthew:] Her boyfriend.
[Josh:] Oh I see.
[Matthew:] She's taking advantage of him, she only wants him for his money.
[Ryan:] And the what's his name's Douglas.
[Matthew:] I don't know, all these men
[Ryan:] No she's not.
[speaker004:] [recording ends] What are you lot listening to?
[Alex:] You've got one.
[Matthew:] Let me hear it.... Are they not allowed? Aren't they?
[Alex:] They're not allowed in school you're not.
[Matthew:] They are. I could listen to the music on mine you know. Oh Jo?.
[Aaron:] you know.
[Matthew:] I couldn't.....
[Alex:] Did you hear that? I am not a rude boy, I am very proper.
[Matthew:] You're very stupid.
[Alex:] ....
[Matthew:] What, where, when, why, how?.
[Alex:] How how fast can you pick it up?
[Matthew:] How fast can what?
[Alex:] How fast can you pick it up?
[speaker004:] ...
[Matthew:] Whenever I want of course, I can choose when.
[Aaron:] Really.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Alex:] When your mum and dad are making love.
[Aaron:] Why are you doing it?
[Matthew:] So these Norwegian people can find out about talk about different things in different countries.
[speaker004:] ?
[Matthew:] Norwegians. [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah. []
[Alex:] Don't record it on the tape cos no one 's nothing.
[Matthew:] . Ah?
[Alex:] Hello people.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] Bad breath.
[Alex:] Bad breath your walkman
[Matthew:] .
[Alex:] He killed me with the death breath....
[Matthew:] How do you know all that?
[Aaron:] I looked it up
[Matthew:] It's by the Beatles. Haven't you heard it?
[Alex:] What is it?
[Matthew:] Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. The advert's for taking L S D with an hallucination. Big dragons in the sky.
[Alex:] Yeah my dad got.
[Matthew:] My mother. [recording ends]
[speaker004:] No, sorry, I need it.
[Josh:] There's no school on Monday.
[Lara:] Ah.
[Josh:] .
[Ryan:] Mayday. It's bank holiday isn't it.
[Josh:] It's bank holiday.
[Ryan:] It's Mayday bank holiday.
[Josh:] It's bank holiday.
[Ryan:] It's that Mayday bank holiday.
[Rob:] I know, I was just testing....
[Lara:] Who?
[Rob:] I said, shut your lick split.
[Lara:] Eh? Eh?.
[Rob:] [singing] Somebody to love. [] Somebody to love....
[speaker004:] It's recording isn't it?...
[Lara:] Chris? Don't be like that Chris.
[Rob:] Oh excuse me. that's how I sneeze. All the plages fly out. Plages plages pages pages.
[Lara:] Why are we going out on that one, not on that?
[Rob:] Because we feel like it right....
[Lara:] Er that pencil case is Sebastian.
[Rob:] Why have you got a picture of yo a naked man on your pencil [LAUGHTER] case []? With a shirt open.
[Ryan:] This is a this is your pencil case isn't it? This is a bumpy pencil case. [LAUGHTER]. I'm surprised yours hasn't dented yet. I'm doing what Miss did to me.
[Rob:] Well done Daniel.
[speaker004:] What are you gonna do?
[Ryan:] Look at mine it's all bumpy.
[Rob:] That looks like a rosette, it.
[Ryan:] Wait man wait.
[Rob:] why don't you do it by yourself?
[Ryan:] No.
[Rob:] Do you want me to hold your hand while you're doing it. one er just one more different er square arrangement of tiles.
[Ryan:] Why want more?
[Rob:] That's what it says on the bleeding sheet.
[Ryan:] Is it bleeding.
[Rob:] Somebody to, somebody to.
[Ryan:] What happened?
[Rob:] Look at Nina's work. balloons and coloured shit.
[Ryan:] Shit. that coloured shit Fucking hell.... What is it? Well it's science.... And maths.
[Rob:] I'd mark those A B C D E if I were you. swearing that.
[Lara:] Oh shut up people swearing in your Irish accents.... Always swearing.
[speaker004:] I have never sweared in my life.
[Ryan:] we we I had a barbecue yesterday.
[Rob:] Is it.
[speaker004:] [recording ends] Seven?
[Matthew:] Mhm.
[Lara:] You've got to give it back tomorrow.
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Lara:] Oh Matthew, you've not done that very well then have you?
[Matthew:] Well no four.
[Lara:] You've done four tapes?
[Matthew:] Well no but I mean I I'm on my third but I mean.
[Lara:] What?
[Matthew:] You know, I should have done four by tomorrow.
[Lara:] How are you gonna do the other one then?
[Matthew:] Tomorrow before I give it back....
[Lara:] .
[speaker004:] last night between England qualify for the World Cup?
[Matthew:] No I think it means they do cos they haven't been beaten in group C....
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] I think so.
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] I think so.
[Lara:] Do you want any salad with it Lauren?
[speaker004:] .
[Lara:] Well I'm going to make you some now.
[speaker004:] Well aren't you busy?
[Lara:] at this particular moment in time.
[speaker004:] Yes please.
[Lara:] What do you want? A piece of lettuce?
[speaker004:] Yes please.
[Lara:] A piece of lettuce and some cucumber?
[speaker004:] Yeah please.
[Matthew:] What?
[speaker004:] spent a hundred and five pounds on food and today
[Matthew:] spent a hundred and five quid on food? Where?
[speaker004:] Tesco's.
[Lara:] .... How was swimming today then?
[Matthew:] It was alright, not bad.
[Lara:] Cold?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] It wasn't all that bad. At least the pool was clean.
[Lara:] Mr Pool?
[Matthew:] The pool.
[Lara:] Oh [LAUGHTER].... Oh is it sometimes dirty then?
[Matthew:] Cos sometimes it doesn't get cleaned probably cos they're
[Lara:] Why?
[Matthew:] I don't know....
[Lara:] Do you want any more salad Matthew?...
[Matthew:] Mm. Yeah I'll have a bit please.
[Lara:] What cucumber?
[Matthew:] Yeah please.
[Lara:] Do you want any of that lettuce she's got, cos there's no more now. Take some off there if you do, take what you want.
[Matthew:] Thanks. [LAUGHTER].
[Lara:] Why are you pouting like that?
[speaker004:] These aren't for you to [LAUGHTER] say [].
[Lara:] Pardon?
[speaker004:] These aren't for you to say. It depends what you want.
[Lara:] No I put it on there.... is that alright?
[Matthew:] Thanks.
[Lara:] Is that all cut up now?... What did you do today at school Lauren?... Huh? What subject? Just that just that, cookery?
[speaker004:] And geography.
[Lara:] There's only two people in the class.
[Matthew:] Two people?
[speaker004:] For cookery, yeah.
[Lara:] Yeah [LAUGHTER].
[Matthew:] Oh. Why?
[speaker004:] Cos it's and everyone else has gone home.
[Matthew:] Ah. Do they meet you at another class?
[speaker004:] ....
[Lara:] Did you ask Pete about the holiday off?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Lara:] Yes?
[Matthew:] Only one class did that.
[Lara:] How did you mean? Did they take did enough people like who were supposed to be in, not turn up.
[Matthew:] No.....
[Lara:] Pardon?
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] ....
[Matthew:] washed.
[Lara:] Yeah.... Didn't Ian go to school today then?
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] . No?
[Matthew:] They're all in A three.
[Lara:] Does anybody go who's out of your class apart from the teacher?
[Matthew:] Oh no all the girls from my class go.
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Lara:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] Yeah. Oh no she didn't she didn't.
[speaker004:] Denise do you know if Denise went?
[Lara:] . Who else what what about what's her name then?
[Matthew:] Nina.
[Lara:] Dark hair. Nina.
[Matthew:] Natasha.
[Lara:] Nati Nina and Natasha. I can't remember what Natasha looks like, has she been to your party?
[Matthew:] Quite pale skin.
[Lara:] Was she at Nina's
[Matthew:] ....
[speaker004:] Is Nina?
[Lara:] Pardon?... Is still out Lauren?
[speaker004:] Mhm....
[Lara:] the sunshine.
[speaker004:] Mhm.
[Lara:] Huh?
[Matthew:] sit in the sun.
[Lara:] Yeah. She's sitting there, what's her name, in the shaft of sunshine through the window.
[Matthew:] Just lying down.
[Lara:] Yeah
[speaker004:] No
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER].
[Lara:] . trouble.
[Matthew:] His face goes all chubby.
[Lara:] .
[speaker004:] But the sun moved.
[Lara:] So did he move with it?
[speaker004:] No.
[Lara:] What did he sit in the cold then?
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Lara:] [LAUGHTER]....
[speaker004:] Did you sell that ring?...
[Matthew:] Did you sell that bracelet?
[speaker004:] Mum knows, just before you get me into trouble.
[Matthew:] I know. I wasn't trying to get you in trouble.
[speaker004:] Yes I did. Did you sell the ring?
[Matthew:] No I haven't asked anyone if they want to buy it.
[speaker004:] Huh?
[Matthew:] I haven't asked anyone if they want to buy it....
[Lara:] Save give it somebody else....
[Matthew:] Perhaps.
[Lara:] One of these days you'll get over Suzanne.
[Matthew:] I'm over her....
[Lara:] Oh dear.... talking.
[Matthew:] What time is dad coming back?
[Lara:] About nine to say that next Tuesday at five o'clock there's a lowdown.
[Matthew:] Eh?
[Lara:] With you on it.
[Matthew:] With me?
[Lara:] Yeah the model of you.
[Matthew:] How?
[Lara:] How what?
[Matthew:] What model of me?
[speaker004:] What the Thinker?
[Lara:] The Thinker, that's the lowdown isn't it?
[Matthew:] No.
[Lara:] Oh.
[Matthew:] That's that's we have maki we have ways of making you think.
[Lara:] Oh lowdown then?
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] That what?
[Matthew:] That that metal man that spins his arms and throws lasers.
[speaker004:] He goes.
[Lara:] Where's.
[Matthew:] He must've gone out. I dunno.
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] No.
[Lara:] Where was I I never saw that.
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] wearing a red stripy shirt, red and yellow stripy shirt, blue trousers and silver arms. silver man. And he goes like that and throws a laser.
[speaker004:] He goes.
[Lara:] I've never seen that.
[speaker004:] He goes like this.
[Lara:] You never took that form to school.
[Matthew:] I know.
[Lara:] What did daddy make the whole thing? Did daddy make the whole thing?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Lara:] I've never seen that thing.
[Matthew:] Whole lot.
[Lara:] never go in the loft do I. I don't remember it at all.
[speaker004:] It's in the loft. in a minute.
[Matthew:] Can I have some pudding please?
[Lara:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] Some puddang....
[speaker004:] No school tomorrow, are you sure?
[Lara:] Who said no school tomorrow?
[speaker004:] That's what you said.
[Lara:] When?
[speaker004:] You said it's off on Wednesdays ad Fridays.
[Lara:] I never said any such thing, I said the library was closed on Wednesdays and Fridays....
[speaker004:] You said it.
[Lara:] When did I say that Lauren?
[speaker004:] When you was talking upstairs.
[Lara:] I said the libraries are closed on Wednesdays and Fridays, why don't you come to the library with me today because it's closed on a Wednesday and Friday.
[Matthew:] we're off school on Monday you know?
[Lara:] You're not.
[Matthew:] Yes we are.
[Lara:] You can't be Matthew.
[Matthew:] It's bank holiday, Mayday.
[Lara:] So what are you at school for?
[Matthew:] We're not at school, that's the point.
[Lara:] Oh I know that. Nobody's at school it's a bank holiday. I thought you said we are at school.
[Matthew:] No no I said we're not.
[Lara:] to the May fair....
[Matthew:] Mm.
[speaker004:] Can't we?
[Lara:] be fit to go it might be nice to go down on Saturday morning come back, Sunday Monday. Would you like to go?
[speaker004:] Yeah I'd love to.
[Lara:] We'll have to ask him tonight how he's gonna be feeling.
[speaker004:] Well it'd be wonderful to take a friend.
[Lara:] Oh I can't do that love I'm sorry. I just can't Lauren. Where anybody gonna sleep and with granddad like the state he's in.
[speaker004:] . Honestly what difference does it make?
[Matthew:] Well I think grandma can do without the extra work.
[Lara:] Yeah.... And granddad doesn't li want people to see him sort of you know when he has to get up and walk about and go to the loo with the door open and I mean it's not so bad for us because we're all related but it's awful for You know I mean I can't imagine Jody or Jessica or Alison or anybody liking it very much. The only thing that you have to do Lauren, if we phone up, if daddy says we can go, you'll have to phone up Victoria tonight.... And see if she's busy.... I mean I suppose if we were just going for the day it would be alright. Then you could take a friend. If we were going there and back in a day but it wouldn't really be worth it to go to the fair. Because best time to go you know, to the fair is at night.
[speaker004:] Yeah but we don't know.
[Lara:] I do.
[Matthew:] I'm going to this year.....
[speaker004:] Is he?
[Lara:] Pardon?
[speaker004:] Is he?
[Lara:] Is he what?
[speaker004:] Going this year?
[Lara:] I don't know if any of us are going till daddy gets back.
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] Me. I dunno, I'll go by myself.
[speaker004:] .
[Matthew:] Pardon?
[speaker004:] Getting me with mum.
[Lara:] I mean how will go round the fair? With Liam or somebody?
[Matthew:] No.
[Lara:] Why not well not much fun going on your own is it?
[Matthew:] I'll go with you and everyone else. At night.
[Lara:] Will you?
[speaker004:] I don't exactly have a lot of choice.
[Lara:] probably not, we're only talking about one night.
[Matthew:] .
[Lara:] We might I don't know if we'll go anyway.... It's be nice to go though if we could.
[Matthew:] an I have another pie please.
[Lara:] How many have you had?
[Matthew:] One.
[Lara:] .
[Matthew:] Thanks.
[Lara:] honestly Matthew.
[Matthew:] It doesn't matter.
[Lara:] Of course it matters it's got to be in by tomorrow.
[Matthew:] Yeah I'll bring it in tomorrow....
[Lara:] Do you want a pie Lauren? Want a yoghurt? Want some ice-cream. I don't know what it is, I'll have a look. Pecan and toffee I think....
[speaker004:] ...
[Lara:] What are these ones?
[Matthew:] Erm blackcurrant.
[Lara:] What are these ones?
[Matthew:] Erm these are the apricot ones.
[Lara:] Have you had enough to eat Lauren?
[speaker004:] Yes.
[Lara:] Pardon?
[speaker004:] Yes.... Stop looking at me like that.
[Matthew:] Well stop snorting.
[speaker004:] You try not being able to.
[Lara:] Have you finished?
[speaker004:] Yes.
[Lara:] Why have you got that look on your face again? Mm?...
[speaker004:] Well I can't get asthma when he's looking at me like that.
[Lara:] Do you want to go away?
[Matthew:] I'm not even looking at you. Right go away.
[Lara:] Do you want to go away?
[speaker004:] Yeah I do
[Lara:] Are you watching any programmes tonight?
[speaker004:] No.....
[Lara:] Are you? put that plate in the sink please....
[Matthew:] Why do want it oh do you want it turned off.
[Lara:] No I want you to talk.
[Matthew:] Fine.
[speaker004:] Is it turned on?
[Matthew:] Yes it is.
[speaker004:] Is it really.
[Matthew:] [whispering] Oh God. [] Yes Lauren it is.
[speaker004:] Oh I didn't realize.
[Matthew:] Obviously.
[speaker004:] What?
[Matthew:] Did you used to play tennis?
[Lara:] Yes at school.
[Matthew:] Are you good at it?
[Lara:] Erm no.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Why not?
[speaker004:] .
[Lara:] .... I don't think I had the right attitude towards it.
[Matthew:] Probably not. Why what was your attitude towards it?... What was your attitude towards it?
[Lara:] I didn't really want to do it very well. No I didn't.... Cos it was all very keen. Very good, they made you feel like sick.
[Matthew:] Creepy.
[Lara:] Mm.
[Matthew:] ....
[Lara:] Right Matthew.... It's about five to six.
[Matthew:] Right.
[Lara:] Go upstairs
[speaker004:] Just in case you can't tell the time.
[Lara:] and do your homework. And I'll tell if anybody rings I'll ask them to ring you back at what? Half past six? It'll all be finished by then will it?
[Matthew:] Erm yeah no. Say seven o'clock anyway.
[Lara:] Go on then. Seven o'clock I'll come up and you show me everything that you've done and then I can make you available to people, yeah?....
[Matthew:] polish off pie. [recording ends]
[speaker004:] twenty percent of the grade
[Josh:] ...
[Matthew:] Yeah mate you better take the register downstairs.
[Josh:] What, is it up here?
[Matthew:] I would think so, has anyone done it?
[speaker004:] No I think he's ill....
[Matthew:] Sherlock. [LAUGHTER] Oh shit! Oh no! No, if he...
[speaker004:] Oh
[Matthew:] What now?
[Josh:] What do we have to do?... Who do we have to
[Matthew:] No seriously cos listen if 's not here that means we're gonna have Mr taking us.
[speaker004:] Yeah but that's fine cos setting our homework.
[Matthew:] Yeah but Mr will make us work in maths.
[speaker004:] But he does it slower it's only a chosen few that can understand him... at that speed.
[Matthew:] Yeah.... Did you hear?
[speaker004:] What?
[Matthew:] Did you hear his joke?
[speaker004:] No.
[Matthew:] Really. Typical Mr interesting comment. [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] How to tame your landlord not to
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] The new ideal America.
[speaker004:] Modern modern weppings weapons cache
[Matthew:] A down to earth approach to beating the government fund. Yeah it was alright....
[speaker004:] you know?
[Matthew:] Yeah. How many sides did you, you wrote like four sides.
[speaker004:] Yeah
[Matthew:] How the fuck did you do that? I've only got like... two and three quarters
[speaker004:] No I write huge
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] my writing's huge....
[Matthew:] Did you get any quotes?
[speaker004:] Four.
[Matthew:] You got four qu
[speaker004:] At least one from each book.
[Matthew:] What!
[speaker004:] Did you have, did you have the book Sarah? Yes.
[Matthew:] Hey have you got the money?... Okay what time? Two okay?
[speaker004:] Are you selling a ticket to Ian?
[Matthew:] What? No I'm gonna sell it to, to erm... [tut] er Jed....
[speaker004:] Well Ian just said he was
[Matthew:] Oh right well, well if he's got the money, yeah. If he... oh right....
[speaker004:] we play the groundhog with the crossbow
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] and as soon as it comes out you just fire a ball of string, yeah, and that way it can't fall down cos you've got
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] it might be better to use like just wait on the edge of like a or something like that the other groundhog just hangs out there, it can't go back down in its hole.
[Matthew:] You are seriously twisted.
[speaker004:] I think it'd work.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] No you are twisted. [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] If it ducks down
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] Did you ever see Caddyshack Yeah.
[Matthew:] No Caddyshack Two is better Part two, part two's when you've got the Oozes and
[speaker004:] Yeah that was
[Matthew:] check out the Angela Davis just walked past. [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] Who's Angela Davis? some civil rights?
[Matthew:] Yeah, no she was a black activist man, she had an Afro that makes, I don't know makes Kunta Kinte look bald. [LAUGHTER] Can you get change for the ticket? How much was that? Anyone lend me fifty P?
[speaker004:] Mark used to do that man, Mark used to shave his eyebrows like here o on top and on, on the sides. shaved it in the middle
[Matthew:] No no no no no no no no you've got chilli on your finger. [LAUGHTER] Hey Rob do you wanna lend me fifty P? I'll wait till he gets back. Now you're all witnesses incidentally, I owe this man a ticket for the concert, I'll give it to him tomorrow
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] so you know I'm not trying to stick you. Erm yeah can I have erm... a garlic bread and a Coke please.
[speaker004:] Anything else?
[Matthew:] And a Coke.
[speaker004:] A medium?
[Matthew:] Yeah. Yes, thanks. Yeah thanks for that catalogue by the way, I'm ordering some of those [LAUGHTER] Have you seen all those books [] all those bo books written by Ragnar Benson
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] Mercenary of Death [LAUGHTER] or something [].
[speaker004:] Do they sell the James Bond you should get that, them
[Matthew:] Yeah. No I thought, I thought the best one had to be erm... home, home and office uses for home ex for high explosive or [LAUGHTER] something stupid like that [] [LAUGHTER] I mean that was And the worrying thing is it all starts in the margin like it had a through school.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah [].
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]... Josh erm... if Chuck gives me the money before... like... Jed does, yeah, do you mind if I sell the ticket to him cos I've sold one to Ian?
[Josh:] No.
[Matthew:] Okay, and I've got like one other spare so... do you wanna keep it for Jed and also?
[Josh:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] Okay.
[Josh:] last night
[Matthew:] Oh okay. Right, okay.
[Josh:] The chances of Jed getting
[Matthew:] I'll, I'll tell
[Josh:] I'll get the money off Jed tonight
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Josh:] and give it to you tomorrow.
[Matthew:] Okay I'll tell Chuck I've sold it....
[Josh:] is it sold out?
[Matthew:] Er no it won't be sold out.
[Josh:] It's not?
[Matthew:] No cos I mean you, Chuck can get it at the Hammersmith Palais.
[Josh:] Right.
[Matthew:] I'll give him the phone number if he wants.... If he just phones them up tonight he can get a ticket.... Yeah. How was your meeting?... Yeah. is such a power crazed bastard nowadays, really pisses me off. I'll see you later, yeah....
[speaker004:] Not too well.... might be interested but
[Matthew:] Who?
[speaker004:] Ian.
[Matthew:] Oh.
[speaker004:] I tried to sell it to Ian What kind of jacket is it? Does it have anything on it? No it's just black it's not
[Matthew:] Josh what's this?
[speaker004:] it's not one of those fucking motorcycle.... It's been in the family for years
[Matthew:] Special commemorative Vietnam bullet holes. Yeah Rob... yeah Rob you know you should have done... taken like a hair out of your head, placed it in there before you and pulled it out. Erm... I dunno, the thing is our prom, yeah, is the day before so like... I'm gonna be pretty [LAUGHTER] fucked [] erm two, a couple of my friends who are coming, they've got... they're like in the middle of the ex their exams like erm... I know my one friend's driving there but he's going from St John's Wood, thanks, erm... we might be able to pick you up, I'm not sure, it depends what's happening or you might go with Josh, like we'll meet outside probably.... We should arrange to meet but we'll like... It starts at seven so
[speaker004:] What time does it finish?
[Matthew:] It says it finishes at midnight but erm I've a feeling piss off like... like about eleven. Oi Rob! Have you seen yet? Have you seen it? Oh yeah you've seen it.
[speaker004:] I wanna see the new one with Bridget Fonda Bridget Fonda
[Matthew:] It's I wanna see it to see how they've screwed it up.
[speaker004:] Yeah. Cos you know they trashed it. I've seen, I've seen a clip
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] he goes into ah McDonald's [LAUGHTER] Yeah []. he's like, like gonna have breakfast and he's like, breakfast every Thursday it's like eleven thirty two and he's like
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [mimicking] don't worry people, don't worry [] [LAUGHTER] He lives in Majorca like, really close to my house
[Matthew:] Who, Michael Douglas?
[speaker004:] he had glasses and I didn't realize, everyone was going with Sharon Stone?
[Matthew:] Yeah. She's not that, I mean she's such a shit actress!
[speaker004:] said it was the most, said it was worse than Body of Evidence. There was one film which she And that's saying something. which she did which is so bad erm I mean really, she did, about one of the first films she did, not, you know before Total Recall
[Matthew:] Some budget porno movie.
[speaker004:] No no it's not [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Oh Year of the Gun? No anyway she's trapped in this apartment and like I wanna see Boxing Helena
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] that's supposed to be really good.
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] It's done by Je erm David as well. This guy, yeah, he falls in love with this woman, takes her to his apartment and slowly, he's a surgeon and he slowly amputates all her arms and legs and keeps her in a box.
[speaker004:] she has no use for her legs
[Matthew:] Oh. Oh okay, whatever. [LAUGHTER] I told you man, it's for [] this university study. It's like an English, it's on Eng English slang and like...
[speaker004:] Are you serious? Yeah I'm serious
[Ryan:] You sure it wasn't?
[speaker004:] assassination attempt
[Matthew:] Shoot me in the mouth.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Get the guns!...
[speaker004:] What do you think he's doing with that? What? Recording us speaking English, can learn to speak English again.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah [].
[Matthew:] That's the plot.... the secret's out. [LAUGHTER]...
[speaker004:] Turn it on.
[Matthew:] It is.
[speaker004:] It's on? Jonathan's a dancing queen
[Matthew:] Yeah, dickhead.
[speaker004:] Jonathan's a queen, period.
[Matthew:] Yeah your mum's a queen.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] trembling... when he made that speech when he... remember when he, remember when you, you weren't there, no you weren't there... he was shaking like a leaf.
[Matthew:] Oh, it's your physics teacher.
[speaker004:] ... [break in recording]
[Matthew:] Yeah when are you gonna see Trespass? No you should man, it's, it's, seriously man they're m it's so funny. Have you seen, have you seen? Oh you said you could get me juice.
[speaker004:] I had it on video anyway
[Matthew:] Yeah I know but your, your uncle w w you s erm... whichever movie did you say you could get, like he's the man or something? Oh yeah, I wanna see that.
[speaker004:] Eh?
[Matthew:] I wanna see that. Have you seen erm?
[speaker004:] Yes, that's rubbish. Isn't it?
[Matthew:] have you seen that? That was funny.
[speaker004:] That was a funny film.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] That one guy... that one black guy, it's cos I'm black isn't it? You know, the way he's always going round like [] [LAUGHTER] Like, is it cos I'm black isn't it? It's cos I'm black. [LAUGHTER] rings his friend's house, he opens the door and he's got like shaving cr shaving foam on his face like ah he's white, he's white! [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Oh yeah and he I still haven't seen it.
[speaker004:] I've got it on video.
[Matthew:] will you lend it to me?
[speaker004:] If you come to Majorca, yeah.
[Matthew:] Oh it's in Majorca. Oh not much much good it's doing there.
[speaker004:] My mum
[Matthew:] Does she? What, gonna take your sister with her and leave her there is she? Is your sister leaving the school? Why? Or when, rather. [LAUGHTER] Don't you ever eat the skin Rob?
[Rob:] Yeah I'm eating it, I'm just scraping
[Matthew:] Oh right. Class in ten minutes.
[speaker004:] What?
[Matthew:] Got fucking chemistry in two m in ten minutes... such a big chemistry test tomorrow, like eat mud or something. I always used to eat paper man, paper you could eat.
[speaker004:] Did you see that film about ants?
[Matthew:] Them, no Th yeah Them. It was like on Channel Four about two weeks
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] that was one freaky fucking movie. When they took over the, the mind of that man and that woman
[speaker004:] They had that erm
[Matthew:] oh shit that was good!
[speaker004:] they, they
[Matthew:] Yeah and they made the shapes that ants could
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] that was damned strange!
[speaker004:] What about Scanners? Oh my God Yeah, Scanners
[Matthew:] Oh! Yeah, that is the best movie. Formal formaldehyde face. That is such a cool movie.
[speaker004:] sunglasses
[Matthew:] Yeah. Like John Carpenter's such, have you seen erm his other, any of his other films like Assault on Precinct Thirteen?
[speaker004:] That was brilliant, that was
[Matthew:] That is such a good, and have you seen the comedy he made, Dark Star? That is so fucking funny man, it's this real B mo B John Carpenter. He like does all his own mu he does all his own music as well I think so. Dark Star man, that, that had to be the funniest movie I ever saw, I saw it when I was about ten.
[speaker004:] Why was it so funny?
[Matthew:] Oh because it's so shittily, I mean it's so obviously a B movie, the alien they find, yeah, is a beach ball with feet
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] and that's this alien [] it's a beach ball with feet that runs around the place. He kills it eventually, he shoots it with this like hypodermic pistol to try to put it to sleep and it just explodes! It's just so dumb, I mean the whole movie is like, it's in the nineteen seventies, yeah, and like they've all got these big fucking boobs and they're stuck out in space... it's fucking odd. It's like that, I hate it when they fucking make cartoons about all kinds of shit like... you know Rambo? And then they make cartoons about it like you know Rambo, they made cartoons out of Rambo... like what the fuck!
[speaker004:] Yeah I remember those. What's that film... this guy goes round and he's re really pissed off and he goes into this er he goes into yeah,
[Matthew:] Gotta go back to school.
[speaker004:] We have an hour.
[Matthew:] Oh. Fuck you I've gotta back for chemistry. Yeah er
[speaker004:] Shit, shit, is that good English? Shit.... my sister.
[Matthew:] Yeah she's ugly. [LAUGHTER]
[Rob:] all my work this weekend.
[Matthew:] Did you do extended essay notes?
[speaker004:] Erm any English? Have you
[Rob:] No.
[Matthew:] I've done forty and twenty of geography... Joe have you got your extended essay notes there?
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] Can I see them? I wanna see how many you've done. Did you actually do a whole fifty?... She'll kill you
[speaker004:] That's fine.
[Matthew:] What?
[speaker004:] She said so.
[Matthew:] Oh.... That's what I like about you Joe, your notes. You haven't done that many.... Katy
[Rob:] Eh?
[Matthew:] Katy
[Rob:] What?
[Matthew:] Erm... yeah. Katy stop it doesn't befit you. [LAUGHTER] Yeah you, you call that maths []!
[speaker004:] This is her homework yeah? [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []. Move up.... No seriously you have to move up one, thank you.
[speaker004:] What the hell!
[Matthew:] No well he couldn't do it either.... Yeah that's the one.
[Rob:] What, what page is this?
[speaker004:] Well given any
[Rob:] Why?
[speaker004:] because he, Mr What are you, what are you doing?
[Matthew:] Screw that.
[Rob:] No! [LAUGHTER] No God!
[Matthew:] Joseph... Joe did you do thirteen, Joe did you do thirteen C?
[speaker004:] Did I do thirteen C... on which one?
[Matthew:] Er er the whole fucking
[speaker004:] You've got my answers there, why don't you look at them?
[Rob:] Well let's see what thirteen C was. Yeah this is thirteen C.
[Matthew:] Is it? Oh okay.
[Rob:] Oh shit let's go downstairs and do it...
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[Rob:] Ah.
[Matthew:] Stop whingeing.
[Rob:] Ah.... Eight thirty tonight we're either committing suicide or murder, one of the two.
[Matthew:] Yeah.... No
[Rob:] discussing our future prospects together.
[Matthew:] Oh I know what you're talking about. I know what you mean. The word cabin fever is a word that jumps to my mind at the moment.
[Rob:] The what?
[Matthew:] Cabin fever?
[Rob:] Cabin?
[Matthew:] You know? Like when you're locked in a room with someone for five days and you wanna kill them after a while. Yeah....
[Rob:] had to run round the building
[Matthew:] Cabin fever.
[speaker004:] Oh what you've just been hanging around too much.
[Matthew:] Ah! I'm just, all I can say is I'm, I'm but I'm glad I went to school, okay? [LAUGHTER] I'm fucking... I'm just happy to be here right now. What?
[Rob:] Is she in there?
[Matthew:] No I can't see her.... Incidentally don't ever try Femidom it's like shagging a crisp packet or a freezer bag.
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] A serious waste of time. Have you ever tried one of those Femidoms
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER] No I haven't [].
[Matthew:] They're useless.
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] It's like shagging a fucking crisp bag I'm telling you. And they rustle. [LAUGHTER]...
[Rob:] Is that times?
[Matthew:] Yeah, he's done that wrong, you don't do it like that.
[Rob:] How do you do it?
[Matthew:] Well I think you do it like that but, oh no maybe you do do it like this.... Oh....
[Rob:] But how come you've got a negative?
[Matthew:] No my answers are fucked
[Rob:] ... Surely this should be a negative cos there's one negative....
[Matthew:] What? Yeah I know so I think it's negative so that negative five's the answer but anyway...
[Rob:] music today....
[Matthew:] Yeah they busk in Trafalgar in er Leicester Square.
[Rob:] ...
[speaker004:] ... are you all familiar with the?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Rob:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] but er I don't know if you can get this information to er to your fellow students but it really concerns the graduation rehearsal... which takes place on... er Friday... erm... on Friday we're going out er as a group on Friday afternoon at one fifteen to Church House er to run through the rehearsal procedure er the graduation... it's important that on that day that you bring along your robes... bring your robes with you and bring your, bring... them along, they should be pressed... so that you can er wear them... er the... you should also please... so dress nicely on that day and wear a tie and bring a tie with you
[Matthew:] graduation?
[Rob:] Eh?
[Matthew:] Is your dad coming to graduation?
[Rob:] No
[speaker004:] but bring a tie with you
[Matthew:] Oh is she?
[speaker004:] a jacket and tie and er the, the robe and Those of you in the twelfth grade who are not graduating er we'd also like you to be so come dressed nicely as well erm... Is it this Friday? This Friday yeah, and we're leaving at one fifteen, there's a coach er those of you in the maths exam could start making your way over to room fifty six
[Rob:] [shouting] Good luck [].
[Matthew:] I dunno. I tell you one thing... I'm slightly starting to regret inviting my girlfriend to come and stay with me for three weeks in France. No but I like her and everything but... holy shit, I really I do need some time to go to school and like be by myself. [LAUGHTER] Do you know what I mean?... It's kind of fucking important....
[Rob:] What is this?
[Matthew:] Saw Nigel Sat on Saturday night.
[Rob:] Do you have four B?
[Matthew:] No
[speaker004:] er would those of you who are left Er... why?
[Matthew:] You don't have to, no you don't have to stop any more... not any more... you can fly direct. You can fly direct now... the new seven four seven four hundreds can do it in one go. I dunno, twenty two hours in a plane?
[Rob:] coming back's
[Matthew:] I, I just have... er I just have to drink a lot that's [LAUGHTER] you know [] put me in first class and full of drink Do you? How come? Your dad... come? Does he fly, does he fly back?
[speaker004:] lazy by the way. M squared minus X squared Yeah.
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] Yeah [LAUGHTER] I know that's my secret... I'm proud of it.
[Rob:] What's this about John being lazy?...
[Matthew:] Who else works there?
[speaker004:] Alan
[Matthew:] Alan? Who's Alan? Oh
[speaker004:] Er
[Matthew:] oh yeah.
[speaker004:] No he's
[Matthew:] Didn't Rob get a job there or something?
[speaker004:] Who?
[Matthew:] Rob.
[speaker004:] No.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[Rob:] gets his cheque today... I have to pick it up for him. I dunno, I dunno how much it
[Matthew:] Why didn't you give Rob a job?
[Rob:] what can Rob do? You know.
[Matthew:] Steal money?
[Rob:] Scare, yeah exactly.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] Scare customers [].
[Rob:] Scare the customers.
[speaker004:] Who?
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER] Rob [].
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Brian you got a new vice?
[Rob:] Hey Brian do you know what happened? You know the... er head security guy?
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Rob:] On Sunday, yeah Yeah. On Sunday, yeah, he got in, I don't know what happened I wasn't there but and supposedly, yeah, he met, did you see Julie, one of the waitresses have you seen her, yeah?
[speaker004:] Upstairs?
[Rob:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] And she?
[Rob:] Yeah
[speaker004:] Yeah.
[Rob:] okay, supposedly she claims that he hit her and winded her and she screamed after she was winded, yeah, which is an impossibility anyway but that's okay but he was arrested... and sacked... so we have to have a bouncer
[Matthew:] Ooh!
[Rob:] Well I don't know but the other three, yeah, are hired by the so I dunno.
[speaker004:] I'll bounce for you,
[Rob:] You wanna be a bouncer, yeah? [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] keep there on the door, that'll scare them... that'll stop unwanted people coming in. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Sit there going ooh ooh ooh [] [shouting] ah ah ah []
[Rob:] No we only have one Italian boy working there.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER] Not for very much longer []. I don't understand why all these guys stop going out with you and shortly afterwards get fired from, kind of funny that ha?
[Rob:] No he hasn't been fired, he's quitting.
[Matthew:] Oh. Why?
[Rob:] Cos he, well he's not quitting he's taking a break
[Matthew:] Mm. And er...
[speaker004:] Michael Jackson... that's male singer of the year, Michael Jackson,
[Rob:] Michael Jackson?
[Matthew:] What was this? What, what was this?
[Rob:] The music awards last night.
[Matthew:] Oh.
[Rob:] My dad was there.... See now here it's possible
[Matthew:] ? eight fifty C S I... B M W.
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Fuck basketball. Who the fuck does he think he is, Bill Lambear
[speaker004:] No but I saw the new X R two five O.
[Matthew:] Oh.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] What are you talking about basketball anyway, who the fuck does he think he is, Bill Lambear or Charles Barclay?
[speaker004:] Right I'll be back in a second. But Spitting Image they were making fun of them and they had a [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] Brian... do you think he's trying to look like, you know Bill Lambear in America?
[speaker004:] Yeah
[Matthew:] Yeah, that guy looks like a freak....
[speaker004:] Bill Lambear the basketball player?
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[speaker004:] I mean he really is a cool guy,
[Matthew:] No Charles Barclay's better.
[Rob:] Well that's why women's basketball's better than guys
[speaker004:] No way!
[Rob:] women have better shots.
[speaker004:] with Michael Douglas?
[Matthew:] Yeah, yeah. Yeah have you seen when he blows up that guy [LAUGHTER] []?
[speaker004:] I saw Loaded Weapon.
[Matthew:] Yeah, is that good?
[speaker004:] Have you seen Loaded Weapon?
[Matthew:] I haven't seen it yet.
[speaker004:] Oh it's, I mean I expected one scene is really good, really... obviously they are taking the piss out of
[Matthew:] Yeah
[speaker004:] You know?
[Matthew:] Yeah
[speaker004:] This guy's in the bathroom or having a piss
[Matthew:] Yeah and they blow him up, yeah.
[speaker004:] this guy's here up here, up here where are you, where are you, up here, up here what's up, I'm taking a shit.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] sorry man, close the door and get out
[Matthew:] a friend of mine lives in erm Beirut a friend of mine, a friend of mine lives in Beirut like erm... apparently now though it's like, I mean Beirut, parts of Beirut are getting like Beverley Hills No but like the all they do is they keep like, you know, they keep a gun in their car. No apparently, yeah, my dad used to carry a gun around so like they'd go, they'd go out to like a restaurant, yeah
[speaker004:] ?
[Matthew:] my dad like in South Africa my dad was telling me, when they went out at night, yeah, like if they were going to a restaurant he'd take a kni he'd take his gun with him... and keep, it's fucking odd man like my dad walking around with a nine millimetre strapped to his Yeah, you can here as well can't you? Diplomatic immunity. are useless fucking rustle like a crisp packet and they, they're just shit.
[speaker004:] they just make you feel so inadequate.
[Matthew:] No they're just shit [LAUGHTER] Shit, it really, fifteen quid a pack, they're useless.
[speaker004:] What am I supposed to do with these pens? Why? Cos they paid for their. It's a publicity stunt by Patricia
[Rob:] Oh yes, get a pen.
[Matthew:] I get one.
[speaker004:] But you only get it if you paid for your
[Rob:] Yeah.
[Matthew:] Yeah I have, I've even got the receipt to prove it....
[Rob:] I
[speaker004:] You never gave me a receipt.
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] There's probably a list in there of the ones you're supposed to give them to.... This is to make, this is a, I mean... Alright can I have one?... One two three... now this is a bit silly, oh there's a pen for me, thank you very much.
[Rob:] Why is my name not on there?
[Matthew:] There'd better be my name down.
[speaker004:] Don't ask me.
[Rob:] That's it, I'm
[speaker004:] I'm on there.
[Matthew:] I'm gonna go and shoot that woman cos I gave my cheque to the office.
[Rob:] I gave my cheque to her personally....
[speaker004:] Well it maybe, you see I've had this, this has been hanging around for a month
[Rob:] Oh okay then that's alright.
[speaker004:] if you only gave it recently
[Matthew:] No I gave my cheque three weeks ago.
[speaker004:] Well all I know is this is all I've got here.
[Matthew:] Can I have a pen anyway?
[speaker004:] No, certainly not.
[Matthew:] Oh go on....
[speaker004:] Give that to will you?
[Matthew:] Can I just go and shout at the office please?
[speaker004:] No.
[Matthew:] Oh go on.
[speaker004:] Go down at break.
[Rob:] What does it say on it?
[speaker004:] It says absolute south bank
[Matthew:] I'm absolutely really pissed o I'm incredibly pissed off.
[Rob:] You could at least take the E off, yeah.
[speaker004:] I, well that was where it came from... I mean cos we were all sitting there and I said well why don't we call it... it was, it was that or Bailey's Irish Cream and... absolute we could get away with.
[Rob:] So why is there an E on it? It's just that, oops! Time
[speaker004:] It's just we can't, we can't have we can't have obvious alcohol absolute on the rocks
[Rob:] Absolutely rocking, you should just say absolutely rocking. Straight up.
[speaker004:] You will find there's so many little, nasty little things that you manage to sneak in there doesn't know about.
[Matthew:] What like on and on a on and on and on?
[speaker004:] Like the year book
[Rob:] When does come in? Next week?
[speaker004:] Next week.
[Matthew:] If I
[speaker004:] on and on and on and on and on as a border, now she thinks that's about the washing machine ad... you know the Ariston washing ad, on and on.
[Rob:] It's not, it's
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] still convinced it's about a washing machine [].
[Rob:] Well yes I mean I see her point. You're n you're not gonna think it's her
[Matthew:] [LAUGHTER]
[Rob:] unless you know her. A lot of people will probably relate it to that commercial I think, or they'll think of the little bunny rabbits in Duracell, that's what I thought
[Matthew:] Yeah.
[Rob:] when you said it. I didn't think that Patricia
[Matthew:] It's the Energiser one, you know that? You know those commercials are the same, it's the Energiser one. Except En Energiser are made by... yeah anyway....
[Rob:] Still going. [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] on and on. Right we might as well get on with something. Let's get on with something. Let's not.
[Matthew:] Let's
[speaker004:] I can't print anything for you.
[Matthew:] Why?
[speaker004:] Why? Because the machine's been down since last Thursday.
[Matthew:] Sunday's the last time Joseph was seen in school. [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] So you can do the following two questions for me please.
[Matthew:] Ooh!
[speaker004:] Ah. What is... A little bit of revision on an old topic.
[Matthew:] Oh! A topic which
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER] In biology, yeah, they had differentiation but I didn't think it was right so I put diffiation down [LAUGHTER] instead [].
[Matthew:] differentiation in biology?
[Rob:] I dunno, it's to do with sperm and there's like
[Matthew:] Don't you mean?
[Rob:] No....
[Matthew:] What?
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER] []
[speaker004:] Jonathan, you're extremely bad at getting words right. Which sys which er political party supports proportional representation?
[Matthew:] Shut up. Labour likes proportional [LAUGHTER] representation [].
[speaker004:] No they don't.
[Matthew:] Yes they do.
[speaker004:] No they don't.
[Matthew:] Yes they do.
[speaker004:] No they don't.
[Matthew:] Oh whatever.
[speaker004:] this question, stop arguing children please.
[Rob:] In each of the following what?
[Matthew:] ...
[Rob:] What does it say after?...
[speaker004:] ...
[Rob:] Oh!... You're not as dumb as you look.
[speaker004:] Sorry?...
[Matthew:] That actually looks more like a W R L
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER]
[Matthew:] curd, that's what it looks like, it looks like curd.
[Rob:] You said it, yeah. [LAUGHTER]... [LAUGHTER] Curd []....
[speaker004:] Can anyone see my water jug around here? There should be a bottle of... is it out on the windowsill or something? ... Have you finished these er Jonathan?
[Matthew:] I can't read your handwriting. Yeah yeah yeah.
[Rob:] times X plus four
[Matthew:] Oh shit I thought that was a two. That's an X then.... [break in recording]
[Rob:] [LAUGHTER] So have I [].
[speaker004:] What's that thing with like all the Us and Vs and
[Matthew:] Tha that's it, it's D, it's V D plus U D V by the X.
[Rob:] No no, no hang on.
[Matthew:] the answer, I really cannot be fucked....
[Rob:] Here we go.... [break in recording]
[Matthew:] came out... that came out Joe.
[speaker004:] Which? I still haven't forgiven you for bloody book antics of a...
[Matthew:] Okay so... [break in recording]
[speaker004:] What was it? John Updike?
[Matthew:] Danny didn't know it.
[speaker004:] you're a little wanker Jonathan.
[Matthew:] Danny, Danny didn't even know the effect physics... you didn't get it.
[Rob:] Here it is.... How do you do the first one, yeah? [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [keeps being breaks in the recording so difficult to hear]
[Matthew:] Did you ever see Beavis and Butthead in America? Did you see, can you get Beavis and Butthead... have you ever seen that? Beavis and Butthead
[Rob:] next year.
[Matthew:] it's like a cartoon have you seen it?...