[Nicola:] Would you like some toast now darling?
[Oliver:] Yes please.
[Nicola:] Let mummy just watch the news then I think Playbus is coming on in a moment.
[Oliver:] Oh
[Nicola:] No we are gonna watch Playbus and then we'll have a bath and then we have to go up to the shops because today is mummy and daddy's wedding anniversary.
[Oliver:] Eh?
[Nicola:] Mummy and daddy's wedding anniversary today. So mummy has to buy daddy a card.
[Oliver:] Is is Mummy nursery?
[Nicola:] No not nursery anniversary. Anniversary is like birthday. It's the birthday of when mummy and daddy got married today.
[Oliver:] Me don't?
[Nicola:] Do you? You know the picture of Mummy and Daddy getting married?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] With mummy's dress and daddy's suit. Big hat?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Yes well that was seven years ago today.
[Oliver:] When I get married I'll get a hat.
[Nicola:] That's right when you get married you have to wear a hat. Then you have go with lots and lots of people and have a big party.
[Oliver:] a scarf. I have to get a scarf.
[Nicola:] Well you can wear a scarf if you want to.
[Oliver:] So we have you get married.
[Nicola:] Well ladies generally wear a nice dresses.
[Oliver:] Can we have a man?
[Nicola:] Ah well here?
[Oliver:] There?
[Nicola:] There? Well ladies just don't wear anything there but men wear a tie don't they. Like daddy wears a tie.
[Oliver:] Yes will you give me to wear a tie?
[Nicola:] Yes that's right. Most people do.
[Oliver:] And you to eat.
[Nicola:] And you eat and you have big big dinner.
[Oliver:] When we give me when we're hungry?
[Nicola:] Mm mm.
[Oliver:] You get your dinner.
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] Lots.
[Nicola:] So we'll go and buy daddy a card today. An anniversary card. Mummy has bought daddy some nice chocolates to eat and we're going to have a special dinner and then next Saturday Nanna Nanna and Del are coming down to look after you
[Oliver:] Yes?
[Nicola:] and you can spend the evening with Nanna and Del in this house and mummy and daddy are going out.
[Oliver:] Not
[Nicola:] No we're going out... to have some fun.
[Oliver:] But I won't cry.
[Nicola:] No. You won't cry because you're being with Nanna and Del.
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Yes you will and Nanna can read you lots of stories.... Can't you?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] That be fun?
[Oliver:] Yes. So
[Nicola:] Maybe Nanna will let you watch video.
[Oliver:] Is her all
[Nicola:] And you can have a cuddle on the sofa with Nanna.
[Oliver:] I don't want to.
[Nicola:] Oh you don't want to have a cuddle?
[Oliver:] No. I don't want sauce
[Nicola:] You can do...
[Oliver:] I am get down... I am going to miss you.
[Nicola:] Okay.
[Oliver:] I am going to miss you. Okay that's good. But this isn't going to fit look.
[Nicola:] No it's too big to go in there isn't it?
[Oliver:] It is. Is... that one's not too big is it?
[Nicola:] No that one fits perfectly...
[Oliver:] I want... this is not going to have... people don't have these in the door.
[Nicola:] Oh no not that one. Because that's a big one isn't it?
[Oliver:] Mm. The have for this thing for this one.
[Nicola:] Mm mm. That's right.
[Oliver:] They don't come out
[Nicola:] Oh no it's gonna rain tonight...
[Oliver:] What's it going to rain for?
[Nicola:] Mm it's going to be raining.... Oh tomorrow is a nice surprise for you.
[Oliver:] Is it?
[Nicola:] Yes when you're in bed it... Ann phoned to say to say that she's bringing and Ali around to play with you tomorrow afternoon.
[Oliver:] Why?
[Nicola:] Well so that you can all play together. That be good? You can have tea.
[Oliver:] Mm. Adem ouch!
[Nicola:] Adem and Alea and then on Wednesday
[Oliver:] Mm
[Nicola:] you're going back to nursery... go back to nursery? You can see Ben at nursery can't you?... And then on Thursday Bill's coming to play with you and you're going to nursery and then on Friday you'll see Lucy in the day time
[Oliver:] Are you going out?
[Nicola:] Am I going out? Oh what when Bill comes?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] No I won't go anywhere.
[Oliver:] Yes
[Nicola:] And on Friday you can see Lucy and then Leo and Russel come home from school and you can play with them for a couple of hours. You can have tea at their house. That be good?
[Oliver:] I don't want to have Ted. Ted? I don't want Ted.
[Nicola:] Well he's he's a nice man isn't he? He's nice to you isn't he? Pardon?
[Oliver:] What's tea do? Yeah
[Nicola:] You eat your tea don't you?...
[Oliver:] Super Ted! Spotty.
[Nicola:] Spotty.
[Oliver:] Yes and Super Ted. Who's that walking mummy?
[Nicola:] That's a space rocket isn't it? With Super Ted. Would you like to watch Play Day then? While we get you some toast?... Would you like to finish off this cereal first?
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] No you
[Nicola:] Oh look.
[Oliver:] Oh look happy birthday party.
[Nicola:] Mm I do Nanna.
[Oliver:] Yes Nanna's birthday. We had a little birthday party.
[Nicola:] And we got
[Oliver:] Oh the party poppers.
[Nicola:] from your face
[Oliver:] Mm. That's right you have to keep it away from the face because they're dangerous aren't they?
[Nicola:] Mm. That's clever.
[Oliver:] Isn't that a
[Nicola:] Mm it's round isn't it? I can... what's round?
[Oliver:] Has we has been you is get is get and you to paint it.
[Nicola:] Oh is it?
[Oliver:] That's
[Nicola:] What shape is that?
[Oliver:] Er... it's a line. It's a line er
[Nicola:] No what shape is that? No go and draw the shape on your chalking board.... No this side with your chalk.... There, draw... What's that?... What shape is that?
[Oliver:] Erm that's a square.
[Nicola:] That's a circle.
[Oliver:] Mm that's a circle.
[Nicola:] That's a very good circle isn't it?... Oh look! The little boy's cleaning his teeth. Oliver why don't you leave Sammy alone? You wouldn't like to be chased all over the place the whole time would you?
[Oliver:] But I like George.
[Nicola:] No! I said you wouldn't like to be chased all the time...
[Oliver:] I'm the hunter.
[Nicola:] Were you? Oliver... like to feed the birds with the toast you didn't eat?...
[Oliver:] No I not going to feed them.
[Nicola:] No I say would you like to feed the birds? Erm
[Oliver:] I want to feed the birds.
[Nicola:] Okay. It's all ready just got to open the door. What you doing? Do you want to go outside?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Well you have to put shoes Oh you want to find it. Let's go and get your wellies and a big jumper. Pardon? Well you can find it can't you? Go and get your wellingtons.
[Oliver:] ...
[Nicola:] ... Mm.
[Oliver:] ...
[Nicola:] Okay.
[Oliver:] Not today.
[Nicola:] No okay not today.
[Oliver:] What is... this?
[Nicola:] Well it's the... fishing net for the goldfish. Well when we clean out the er thing with the big fishing net for the pond but it's a small one when we clean out the fish tank.
[Oliver:] can I? I want erm scotbald erm skateboard.
[Nicola:] We're only going out to find your er toy that you lost aren't you? Put your wellingtons on. Mummy get you a jumper to wear.
[Oliver:] I want to get my skateboard.
[Nicola:] Well you can play with it when you come back here. You don't want me to take it outside do you?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Well it's very cold out today.
[Oliver:] I want to take it today.
[Nicola:] Alright. Will you stay here and Mummy'll get you a sweater to put on.... Okay?
[Oliver:] Okay.
[Nicola:] Right you stay down here then.... There you are
[Oliver:] Where's Oliver going?
[Nicola:] Where's Oliver going?
[Oliver:] He's gonna eat a cup of tea.
[Nicola:] Going to take a cup of tea. There he is [LAUGHTER] Cup of tea. There we are. You're not taking this outside because you might lose this. We need these to clean fish don't we?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] skateboard.
[Nicola:] Why do you have to take your skateboard because you can't ride it up the bank can you?
[Oliver:] Mummy!
[Nicola:] Yes!
[Oliver:] I can't find it.
[Nicola:] It's here.
[Oliver:] I can't find it.
[Nicola:] Why?
[Linda:] Hullo happy anniversary.
[Nicola:] Hello Oh my goodness!
[Linda:] Didn't get you back or anything did I?
[Nicola:] No we're just running very very very late.
[Linda:] Oh. Hullo sweetheart.
[Nicola:] What a lovely surprise. Thank you.
[Linda:] All right?
[Nicola:] Isn't it lovely.
[Linda:] Keith's in the car. He's got such awful cold
[Nicola:] Has he?
[Linda:] Yeah and cough again. So I've kept him off for off it's not fair with Oliver. Erm he's just come down with this rotten old cough and cold again and I was going to take him to the doctor's but then they don't like it giving them anything and I don't like giving him anything so
[Nicola:] Maybe just give him something so... it's so cold as well
[Linda:] It is.
[Nicola:] I just concentrate to put the heating on. It's just... It's tempting I must admit. You know I thought once or twice about putting it on but mm go enough
[Linda:] Yeah that
[Nicola:] A week without one and then...
[Linda:] No and it is...
[Nicola:] Saturday! No Saturday! He was coughing so much Saturday.
[Linda:] He was coughing so much that he made himself sick.
[Nicola:] Whooping cough was it?
[Linda:] but I put him on some medicine I got from the chemist and it seems to have calmed it down but his nose is more er hot and cold
[Nicola:] No! Oliver.
[Linda:] so er I've got to keep him off school today and see how he goes over the next day or two.
[Nicola:] If he's going to be miserable I mean it's only nursery it doesn't really matter.
[Linda:] Oh no! Well I phoned them up and you know they... I only have to say it's Mrs and they say oh! Ben's Mum.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]
[Linda:] I said yeah he's coughing
[Nicola:] Well if he's coughing as well and he might make himself sick.
[Linda:] Well this is my fear because I think oh God
[Nicola:] Yeah but I mean it's not fair on him and it's not fair on the teachers because they have to keep rushing around wiping his nose and everything
[Linda:] It's not yeah yeah yeah it isn't fair so er I thought right you know, I'll keep him home.
[Nicola:] Oliver said he wanted to go to nursery today because I got some yellow cards you know they're Daffy Duck
[Linda:] Oh yeah!
[Nicola:] from Marks and Spencer you know different shapes.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] He must have about ten. And I said to him on the weekend. I think it would be a good idea to take these to nursery because I'm sure they would be able to do something with them.
[Linda:] Yeah! And I say over a year now difficulty.
[Nicola:] No! Ben's having a little sleep darling. On Wednesday.
[Linda:] He's not very well at the moment.
[Nicola:] He's got a nasty cold.
[Linda:] Anyway I won't keep you standing
[Nicola:] I've never been well over the weekend that's why we got up so late.
[Linda:] You weren't well
[Nicola:] I don't know must have had some sort of virus or something
[Linda:] Ooh!
[Nicola:] because er Saturday Bill went to work at the weekend
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] which was good news moneywise
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] and er on erm Saturday is my mum's birthday Friday.
[Linda:] That's nice.
[Nicola:] Saturday they're coming round to dinner. So... I had to... go and get a card and you know bits and pieces.
[Linda:] Yeah
[Nicola:] So went out and I was feeling really tired but I thought well I just been getting up very early in the mornings so
[Linda:] Yeah
[Nicola:] you know.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] When we came back absolutely exhausted. Like sitting in a chair and drinking a cup of tea. I just can't do anything else. And Bill came home really early
[Linda:] Mm
[Nicola:] so we had to sit down for a while. So I decided to do that and started to feel so sick.
[Oliver:] Oh no!
[Nicola:] I was really nauseous and everything.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] And er then by the time they actually came I just felt awful.
[Linda:] Oh no.
[Nicola:] And I thought I daren't let on cos it's you know
[Linda:] Ah there's nothing worse
[Nicola:] And er they had they brought a bottle of champagne down
[Linda:] Oh my god.
[Nicola:] My Dad was pouring it out and we were giving Mum the presents and stuff. In a minute. In a minute. And er well after a while I had to rush upstairs.
[Linda:] Ooh!
[Nicola:] So Mum said you all right? Must've come back looking like a ghost
[Linda:] Oh no!
[Nicola:] you want us to go. Oh no! just talking and stuff tends to take your mind off.
[Linda:] You feel better now?
[Nicola:] Yeah. And I didn't have anything to eat Saturday at all. And then yesterday Bill went to work again and luckily he was home by lunchtime.
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] We got up about nine so it wasn't too bad. Bill came home about half past one. And he still wanted to go and have a sleep. And I went to bed. Which is not like me! And I got up at er five o'clock. I started to feel better and Bill was doing the garden. Then Phil came round.
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] And er I started to feel a bit better and suddenly I felt ill again.
[Linda:] Oh no!
[Nicola:] Really sort of you know
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] just achey. And my head was just pounding!
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Well I thought it was going to explode!
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] And then... I went to bed and this morning woke up later.
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Because Phil was here Bill was
[Linda:] They didn't have you up?
[Nicola:] No! No! No! I was up at about ten I suppose. No about half past nine. And er because Phil was here Oliver went to bed about ten so he woke up about ten And I've swallowed a couple of pills and feel fine.
[Linda:] I think I'm the same.
[Nicola:] Really odd. You know this weather is I think confuses us it's really odd. You know I just felt I simply odd awful sick. I just felt really run down. Ill you know?
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] And er let's hope little one doesn't Yeah why I sort of kept away from him. And I didn't eat anything. I wasn't hungry.
[Linda:] Well the thing is if you have got a tummy virus like that you're best bet is not eat anything
[Nicola:] No! Well I didn't want anything to eat.
[Linda:] No.
[Nicola:] But yesterday I really fancied something sweet. Lucky I had some biscuits in So whether it was er because my period started on Friday
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] So Mum said you know could it be my blood sugar level.
[Linda:] Yeah!
[Nicola:] It could be right down. That can happen.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] She made me
[Linda:] That looks like a Mars Bar you got don't they?
[Nicola:] Yeah that's right. We had noticed the week before that er that we had some Penguin biscuits in and er really sort of we kept looking at these Penguins
[Linda:] And you left that one
[Nicola:] Yeah I know and he started munching it and he's made it all soggy. But er I kept looking at them on Friday. I finally succumbed. I think it was you waving the temptation under my nose. And I did I had one today. But I think that's got a lot to do with it.
[Linda:] Mm. Because it seems something you're not used to eating
[Nicola:] Yeah. No. It's nice isn't it?
[Linda:] Oh it's only the school
[Nicola:] It's lovely.
[Linda:] And then the other day you were saying that it's nice to have someone drop in
[Nicola:] Yeah. It's lovely. No it's nice. It's lovely. Do you want to come in now?
[Linda:] No I won't Niki because he's in the car and if he wakes up and he's going to be so unhappy.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Linda:] and scream.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Linda:] is faulty. His cough is [cough]. It's not a whoop it's not a whooping cough don't get me wrong but it's you know he's chesty
[Nicola:] Barking Yeah yeah
[Linda:] Yeah. Barky, that's it.
[Nicola:] He is very chesty anyway.
[Linda:] Well yes. So I have to be very careful. I've got an appointment er Thursday anyway because I've noticed he's been sleepy he's all blocked up all all over there. specially.
[Nicola:] Oliver please don't do that. Right go and get that sword in the pampus grass and bring it back in here.
[Linda:] There it is
[Oliver:] Oh no I don't
[Nicola:] It's in there in the pampas grass. I can see it... You know so I'll take him home but I promised him er Jaffa Cake when we get home
[Linda:] Maybe I don't know but it just so I would say he shouldn't snore like he does all night. Not on his front on his back
[Nicola:] Lucy does.
[Linda:] Does she?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Linda:] It's terrible! You know you could
[Nicola:] She coughs a lot.
[Linda:] Does she? basket with you
[Nicola:] Cos he he's she snores. The way she falls asleep [snore] She sounds like Bill when she snores. She sounds like an old man.
[Linda:] You wouldn't think for a dainty little thing would you?
[Nicola:] I know she's sitting there and she snores with her mouth wide open. She obviously
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] breathes
[Linda:] Yeah
[Nicola:] through
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] her mouth
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] that's why she sort of snores and when she wakes up she's coughing spluttering.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] She sounds like she's smoking sort of sixty a day. [LAUGHTER]
[Linda:] Poor little thing. I know Perhaps it is just something that
[Nicola:] Or some children have and some children don't. With Oliver it's his ears. If he's going to get anything he gets it in his ears. He seems to be growing out of it. They said he would.
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] in the winter once a month.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Apparently you can get a.
[Linda:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] I didn't know that. I mean I'm glad I didn't
[Linda:] I reckon
[Nicola:] Mm. They don't seem to have dried out this winter. And I think he'd only had one. She's been quite lucky. Put that down please!
[Linda:] Anyway look I love and leave you
[Nicola:] This is lovely! Thank you ever so much.
[Linda:] Have a lovely party
[Nicola:] We are going out on Saturday. Yeah we are definitely going out on Saturday. So er we er Mum and Dad sent us a card
[Linda:] Oh that's nice!
[Nicola:] and bought us some flowers
[Linda:] Oh! They're beautiful
[Nicola:] Yeah! And er Bill give me some roses which were
[Linda:] Oh! Lovely! Oh that's nice!
[Nicola:] But he woke me up this morning to wish me a happy anniversary.
[Linda:] Have you
[Nicola:] I bought him some er I bought him some er erm white chocolate truffles er in on Saturday. I forgot to get him a card to go out again for a card.
[Linda:] Oh no!
[Nicola:] Well I might I wouldn't mind getting Yeah I think I'll walk down to Green went out for a couple of hours in the morning felt grotty didn't go out at all.
[Linda:] No.
[Nicola:] Er we intended to go out to go to the garden centre I didn't do any of it.
[Linda:] Mm.
[Nicola:] But er we er... Oliver please!
[Linda:] Not your Mum's sweetheart.
[Nicola:] Er Oliver can you pick that up now?
[Linda:] we better go.
[Nicola:] Come on then in you come we're gonna go in the bath now.
[Linda:] You have a nice bath it's lovely to see you again Oliver all right. We'll see you on Wednesday at nursery school.
[Nicola:] Yeah. See how he is. Maybe we can er to get better before we spend any...
[Linda:] anyway you're going to pick up you know it's best to sort
[Nicola:] Well I hope he gets better.
[Linda:] Thanks. Well I hope so. at nursery and see how he is.
[Nicola:] By Wednesday he might be a lot better if you keep him in.
[Linda:] I'll keep him on that stuff
[Nicola:] Yeah. Yeah I know. They get so bored don't they?
[Linda:] I know.
[Nicola:] Come on then sweetie pie? Well I feel a lot better today. I mean on Saturday. Wasn't it just as well we didn't go out Saturday? Right let's pick up these bricks. Specially when you don't go out very often. Oliver done it. I bent down to do it and he always pokes me in the eye with it. I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! This is a lovely surprise. Thank you! It's very nice nice of you!
[Linda:] Have a nice day!
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER] Doing the hoovering [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Thanks Lyn I'll see you on Wednesday. Bye! Bye! This is nice isn't it? Mummy and Daddy's anniversary.
[Oliver:] ... [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] ... That's nice isn't it?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Put that up there with the other one. Some nice flowers.... Cut these and put them in a nice vase.... Did you find your missing sword?
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Pardon? I'm going to have a bath now. Go and get all your toys and bring them back inside.
[Oliver:] I don't want to
[Nicola:] Come on. I want your skates and your skateboard inside please. Bring them indoors please.
[Oliver:] I don't want to.
[Nicola:] Oliver! Come on darling now be a good boy. Now pick up the skateboard. Come on. Come on. Pick it up. Come on pick it up.
[Oliver:] here you are.
[Nicola:] Oliver now come on darling be a good boy give me that. Now you're coming in now because we're going to have a bath and we're going out. Now will you pick this up for me? Pick it up now! Oliver in a moment I'm going to get very angry with you. Now pick this pick it up now!... Now go and get your skates now. Go and get your skates now! Is mhm tummy.
[Oliver:] What hurts your tummy? You tell me what hurts and I'll know how to make it better.
[Nicola:] My tummy.
[Oliver:] You've got a tummy ache?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Why have you got a tummy ache? Do you know?
[Nicola:] It's, it's, I keep falling down.
[Oliver:] You keep falling down?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Ooh.... Let's go in your bedroom, and get dressed. Do you want to get dressed first?
[Nicola:] Would you like to do some puzzles?...
[Oliver:] make it.
[Nicola:] Well we could do this one, it's quite a good one. We haven't done this one for a long time have we?
[Oliver:] Shall we do it together?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Let's do it... now.
[Nicola:] Well shall we take it downstairs?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] I'm taking these books downstairs.
[Oliver:] ...
[Nicola:] Let's get dressed first....
[Oliver:] What's this one called?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] What's this bit called, what is this person called?
[Nicola:] It's Fireman Sam.
[Oliver:] Fireman Sam.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] What have they got on their heads?
[Nicola:] Well, firemen's helmets haven't they?
[Oliver:] Yeah. Well what are they going to do with them?
[Nicola:] Well they wear them so that when they're putting out the fires they don't hurt their heads....
[Oliver:] Well.
[Nicola:] Come on, let's get dressed. Which pants are you wearing?
[Oliver:] What's he got on his mouth?
[Nicola:] On his mouth? A moustache.
[Oliver:] What's he got it on his mouth for?
[Nicola:] Well, some... men have... moustaches, they grow hair like his.
[Oliver:] Mm. And.
[Nicola:] Come on then, let's put your underwear on.
[Oliver:] could I?
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] It doesn't hurt does it?
[Nicola:] Not any more.
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Come on sweetie.... [LAUGHTER] silly boy.
[Oliver:] What's this one called?
[Nicola:] What?
[Oliver:] What's this one called?
[Nicola:] It's a nursery rhyme book.
[Oliver:] I got one of these already.
[Nicola:] Well that's your old one but we bought a new one didn't we on Saturday.
[Oliver:] I got one already. buy two ones.
[Nicola:] Okay.
[Oliver:] Ow!
[Nicola:] Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.... Okay. Let's get dressed shall we first?
[Oliver:] I don't like Fireman Sam.
[Nicola:] Oh, don't you?
[Oliver:] No....
[Nicola:] Thought you did.
[Oliver:] I didn't.... for me?
[Nicola:] I'll have a look in the garage cos daddy put all your books in the garage. In the car. Let's get you dressed and then I'll have a look for you.
[Oliver:] Postman Pat
[Nicola:] Well I don't think it's in there darling cos I've already looked haven't I?
[Oliver:] ... What is this one called?
[Nicola:] Magic Music Songbook....
[Oliver:] This is..... This is my.
[Nicola:] Isn't it?
[Oliver:] What's this mummy?... What are they mummy?
[Nicola:] That's what makes the music, look....
[Oliver:] . I'll show you.
[Nicola:] I'm doing it for you. I thought you wanted me...
[Oliver:] Is going round mummy?...
[Nicola:] don't do that.
[Oliver:] What's that?
[Nicola:] That's Ronald McDonald. Right look. Go and get dressed before you catch cold. Do you want me to do that one?
[Oliver:] Yes. What's that one?
[Nicola:] That's a rowing boat. Right....
[Oliver:] What's that?... Mummy?
[Nicola:] Fridge
[Oliver:] Fridge. What's the for?... What's the fridge for? Mummy? What's he want.
[Nicola:] I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
[Oliver:] I
[Nicola:] Oh umm oars.
[Oliver:] Oars. do'd them. I do'd them mummy.
[Nicola:] You. Right, now. Umm.... [playing a musical toy and singing along] Merrily, merrily.... That one doesn't really sound right does it?
[Oliver:] I do that one.
[Nicola:] Right let's do another one. Let's do one that might sound. There we are. This is a good one. Look. We wish you a merry Christmas.
[Oliver:] Yes.... mummy? Who's that?
[Nicola:] That's a family having Christmas together.
[Oliver:] Umm what have they got? What have they got mummy? What have they got?
[Nicola:] Crackers.
[Oliver:] Crackers. And what do they do with them?... [toy music].
[Nicola:] This doesn't seem to be working properly. Right. [musical toy] [singing] We wish you a merry Christmas... we wish you a merry Christmas... wish you merry Christmas... and a happy new year. [] There. Merry Christmas. Why do that mummy?
[Oliver:] Well they're crackers. You pull them don't you and presents come out d'you remember?
[Nicola:] Mhm. Er what the presents come out for?
[Oliver:] Well when you pull the cracker
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] it goes bang! And then the present falls out with a hat. D'you remember?
[Nicola:] Yes. And we had a Christmas tree....
[Oliver:] Pretty Christmas tree isn't it?
[Nicola:] I, I want
[Oliver:] Well not now because you only have Christmas trees at Christmas don't you.
[Nicola:] Yeah. So
[Oliver:] When Christmas comes around again
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] then we'll have a nice Christmas tree again.
[Nicola:] Yes. Are we Christmas.
[Oliver:] And Santa Claus comes doesn't he?
[Nicola:] Christmas lots and lots of for me.
[Oliver:] Mhm. That's right, lots and lots of presents.
[Nicola:] Aren't I lucky?
[Oliver:] You are, a very lucky boy.
[Nicola:] Mhm They're sheep. They're sheep. Who's going there?
[Oliver:] Pardon?
[Nicola:] Who's going there?
[Oliver:] That's where the sheep go when they want to go to bed.
[Nicola:] Yes. sheep dead.
[Oliver:] Bed. Go to bed.
[Nicola:] Dead.
[Oliver:] No, bed. Bed. Let's put your socks on.
[Nicola:] What's this one called, mummy? What's this one called.
[Oliver:] That one's called When the Saints go Marching In.
[Nicola:] Will you do this one for me?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] What have they got, mummy?
[Oliver:] They've got trumpets and trombones and flutes [yawn]. Ooh, this one's very difficult.
[Nicola:] What's he got?
[Oliver:] He's got a flute. Oh look!
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] What's this one called?
[Nicola:] Oh. This one's called snow.
[Oliver:] This one's called Jingle Bells.
[Nicola:] Mm. Jingle Bells.
[Oliver:] How does Jingle Bells go?... Sing it then.
[Nicola:] [singing] Jingle bells, jingle bells
[Oliver:] Jingle all the way....
[Nicola:] Jingle all the way. [] [music in background]
[Oliver:] Right, let's sing shall we?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] [singing] Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
[Nicola:] [singing] Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way []. What's that mummy? What's that?
[Oliver:] in a one horse open sleigh [].
[Nicola:] What's that? What's that?
[Oliver:] Snowman.
[Nicola:] Snowman....
[Oliver:] [singing] Jingle bells jingle bells, jingle all the way. What fun it is to ride in a one horse open... []. That's a good one isn't it? Oh look! Dressing up.
[Nicola:] What's this one called?
[Oliver:] This one's called Lavender Blue.
[Nicola:] Oh what's he got?
[Oliver:] He's got a sword.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] And a cape and a crown. He's being a king isn't he?
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] And so what's she being?
[Nicola:] She's being umm
[Oliver:] A queen.
[Nicola:] Mm. A queen.
[Oliver:] That's right.
[Nicola:] What's he, what's he being for.
[Oliver:] Well, cos kings used to have swords in their belt. [yawn]. Shall we...
[Nicola:] Looks like a pirate. To me.
[Oliver:] Mhm. Looks like a pirate to you. [singing] Lavender blue dilly dilly lavender... green... I am a king dilly dilly you shall be queen.
[Nicola:] Has she got a king?
[Oliver:] She's a queen.
[Nicola:] And why she, has she got a sword?
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Oh. Look there's another one there.
[Oliver:] Oh, sorry. Polly Wolly Doodle. I don't know this one.
[Nicola:] They got a train.
[Oliver:] Mhm. I don't know this one at all. You do this one then.
[Nicola:] [humming]
[Oliver:] Sing polly wolly doodle all the day. That's what you have to sing. Sing it then.
[Nicola:] Doodle all day.
[Oliver:] Polly wolly doodle all the day. Sing.
[Nicola:] [singing] da do do day. la la la all day. Do do do do []. What's this one called?
[Oliver:] This one's called My Bonny Lies over the Ocean.... D'you want me to do it?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] [sings and plays] My body lies
[Nicola:] Where's mummy? Why he looking there for?
[Oliver:] Well he's looking out to sea. [singing] My body [].
[Nicola:] What's that?
[Oliver:] That's a boat. Do you want me to do it or not?... You do, right. [sings and plays] my bonny lies over the ocean Mhm? Well bonny I think. Oh this one's good, look. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Right, here we gol. [sings and plays] Twinkle twinkle little star how I wonder what you are. Up above the world so bright like a diamond in the sky
[Nicola:] It's dark isn't it?
[Oliver:] Yes. Twinkle twinkle little star
[Nicola:] What's it dark for? What's it dark for?
[Oliver:] It's night. How I wonder what you are.
[Nicola:] It's night.
[Oliver:] That's right, it's night time.... Oh.
[Nicola:] Aah.... Mum what's she got?
[Oliver:] What?
[Nicola:] What's hand?
[Oliver:] She's just pointing isn't she.
[Nicola:] What's she got in her hand?
[Oliver:] She hasn't got anything in her hand. She's just pointing with her finger.
[Nicola:] She's got a sword.
[Oliver:] Oh has she. Okay.... Right mummy's going downstairs now.
[Nicola:] Wait for me.
[Oliver:] Come on then.
[Nicola:] Read this one....
[Oliver:] Well hang on cos I have to phone Emma. We're going out in a minute anyway.
[Nicola:] Mhm I like giants.
[Oliver:] Giants?
[Nicola:] Mm. Th- they're knives.
[Oliver:] They're what?
[Nicola:] They're knives.
[Oliver:] Knives?
[Nicola:] Knifes.
[Oliver:] A knife.
[Nicola:] And th-, they cut theirselves.
[Oliver:] They cut
[Nicola:] Mm. Oh what's the giant got?
[Oliver:] The giant. With a tee at the end.
[Nicola:] Well what's he got?
[Oliver:] What's he got. [emphasizing t]
[Nicola:] What's he got in his hand?
[Oliver:] I don't know.
[Nicola:] He's got a sword.
[Oliver:] A sword?
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] Mhm.... Right, stand up. Left, right.
[Nicola:] Oh.... Mm.
[Oliver:] Put your coat on.
[Nicola:] ...
[Oliver:] are you?
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] What? No, you can't wear that going out.
[Nicola:] Please.
[Oliver:] You can't darling, don't you start being angry. Right, hold this, hold this. And stop showing off, no, no, no, no, no.
[Nicola:] Don't want it.
[Oliver:] Well don't have it then.
[Nicola:] Please, please it's mine.
[Oliver:] Alright well have it then.
[Nicola:] Oliver please don't do that to the flowers.
[Oliver:] No
[Nicola:] No I don't want you to do anything like that to the flowers at all. Well I'm sure they don't like you if you keep bashing them. Quickly, in the car. Come on, in you get.
[Oliver:] I make them dead.
[Nicola:] Come on, in you get.
[Oliver:] I make them dead.
[Nicola:] Go up there further.
[Oliver:] Mm?
[Nicola:] Go up there further so that you can get in the car properly.... Go on, in you get.
[Oliver:] I can't.
[Nicola:] Yes you can, pull the seat forward.... Oh Oliver, go up there. [sigh]. Go on.... Put this down and then maybe you'll be able to get in. Mu who's that?
[Oliver:] Mhm?
[Nicola:] Who
[Oliver:] Who's what?
[Nicola:] Who's in that car.
[Oliver:] Well they're just people. [car horn] Go on, out the way for god's sake....
[Nicola:] Why
[Oliver:] Well it's just a stupid person who can't drive properly.
[Nicola:] There we are... there's a card for daddy.... And we've got his present at home.... Some biscuits... for when Alia and Odem come tomorrow.
[Oliver:] And to me.
[Nicola:] And for you, yeah.
[Oliver:] What have you got?
[Nicola:] Well it's just biscuits for everybody.
[Oliver:] for me.
[Nicola:] Yes, for you and for Alia and for Odem.
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] And for Ann and for mummy....
[Oliver:] Mm.... can't we?
[Nicola:] Mhm. That's right, we can all be the same.
[Oliver:] and who's going... to our house? What house mummy? What house?
[Nicola:] Our house.
[Oliver:] We're party
[Nicola:] We're not having a party we're just gonna, they're just coming round in the afternoon... to play with you and we can have a drink and...
[Oliver:] And we
[Nicola:] Well... we're see what the weather's like.... Cos it may be nasty weather tomorrow.... Pardon darling?
[Oliver:] ... weather for?
[Nicola:] Well on the news they said the weather was gonna be nasty. I got one of those, haven't I? One of those skateboards?
[Oliver:] That's right.
[Nicola:] You need to put, need to put... one foot on there, one foot on.
[Oliver:] Where you on your skateboard in the garden today? I said, where you on th- on your skateboard in the garden today?
[Nicola:] Umm. Umm not today.
[Oliver:] Yes you were.
[Nicola:] What's that mummy?
[Oliver:] Pardon darling.
[Nicola:] What's that?
[Oliver:] What's what?
[Nicola:] What that?
[Oliver:] Oh that's just a thank you because... the person in the car behind let me through... so I just said thank you. That was all.
[Nicola:] Don't hit the flowers mummy.
[Oliver:] I'm not, darling.... There we are.
[Nicola:] What did we do it for?
[Oliver:] Mm. What we had to do was pop out to buy daddy a card... and we got a paper and we got some biscuits and cake for tea for tomorrow....
[Nicola:] What noise they make?
[Oliver:] What noise do doggies make?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] What noise do you think doggies make?
[Nicola:] Woof woof.
[Oliver:] Woof woof?
[Nicola:] Mm that's what they do.
[Oliver:] Do they?
[Nicola:] I got pussycat.
[Oliver:] You've got a pussycat, that's right....
[Nicola:] ?
[Oliver:] Pardon darling?
[Nicola:] I saw a doggie with daddy.
[Oliver:] You saw that, you saw that doggie with daddy?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] And what's his name?
[Nicola:] Mm I don't know what it's
[Oliver:] His name is Barney. Isn't it?
[Nicola:] He's barmy as well.
[Oliver:] No Barney. That's what his name is, Barney.... There we are.... Woops a daisy. Right come out in the hallway and take your coat and shoes off.
[Nicola:] Ooh. I'm dead now.
[Oliver:] Oh are you? I thought you were dancing.
[Nicola:] [shouting] ow, ow, ow, ow [].
[Oliver:] Ow, ow, ow, ow.... Ow, ow, ow, ow.... [whispering] Oh, who's that? Hello.
[Bill:] Hello. Alright?
[Oliver:] Quick.
[Nicola:] that mummy?
[Bill:] Ooh, look what I've got! Ooh present for daddy.
[Nicola:] Right you've gotta give these to mummy. Look.
[Oliver:] Look, look
[Bill:] Oh flowers! Ooh they're lovely aren't they?
[Nicola:] Give her the card. Thank you very much. Pardon? Pardon?
[Oliver:] I wanna eat one daddy. [tv making too much noise]
[Nicola:] Ooh, ooh
[Oliver:] Here you are.
[Nicola:] Ooh dear! Ooh. Lots and lots of flowers isn't there?
[Oliver:] Sit down.
[Nicola:] What are you doing? What are you after?
[Oliver:] sitting down.
[Nicola:] Are you, yeah? Daddy's gonna have one of these chocolates.
[Oliver:] I want one.
[Nicola:] Oh you, this is daddy's present. You can't this is daddy's present.
[Oliver:] I wa [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] I can't give you one cos this is daddy's present. No you can't! No you can't.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER] Please. I want one.
[Bill:] for lunch.
[Nicola:] Janet!
[Oliver:] Can I have one. I want that one. I want that one.
[Bill:] Which one do you want?
[Oliver:] That one.
[Nicola:] That one. That's daddy's favourite.
[Bill:] Please.
[Oliver:] this one
[Nicola:] That's daddy's favourite.
[Bill:] Oh Bill, let him
[Nicola:] Okay wait a minute. Let daddy open them. Goodness gracious me! Oh, let go! [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] Anyone would think you'd never seen a chocolate before!
[Nicola:] Wait a minute.
[Bill:] Let him have the one he ones.
[Nicola:] Right, what one, shut your eyes. Shut your eyes. Shut your eyes.
[Bill:] No, let him have the one he wants.
[Oliver:] I want that one. Mmmmmm.
[Nicola:] Oh that's daddy's poor chocolate!
[Oliver:] I want that one..
[Bill:] Oh William, leave
[Oliver:] You have that one.
[Nicola:] Okay.
[Oliver:] that one!.
[Bill:] Mummy want one.
[Nicola:] Mmm.
[Bill:] Now leave them alone and eat that one. No you just get on with the one you've got.
[Oliver:] You have that one.
[Bill:] Yeah, okay....
[Oliver:] Look daddy.
[Nicola:] What's that?
[Oliver:] I show you how it works.
[Nicola:] Ooh sorry.... Is that daddy's one?... Eat it, before it melts. That's a mouse, isn't it?...
[Oliver:] It's a rat!
[Nicola:] Let me have a look....
[Oliver:] Shall I show you?
[Bill:] ... My flowers are nice, thank you.
[Nicola:] Nice?
[Bill:] Mhm....
[Nicola:] Two bunches of red roses.
[Bill:] Mm. I know, I saw them.
[Nicola:] It's my present.
[Bill:] buy flowers.
[Nicola:] Yeah but I can't eat them.
[Bill:] No, I can't eat mine!
[Oliver:] You can. No you can, you can....
[Nicola:] Ask mummy if she'd like one.
[Bill:] No, don't pick for me, bring them over here.
[Nicola:] No. Ask mummy if she'd like a chocolate.
[Oliver:] that one.
[Bill:] Just bring them over here. No, they, daddy likes those. No, daddy can have that one cos they're his favourite.
[Oliver:] Here you are daddy.
[Nicola:] Thanks very much Oliver.
[Oliver:] And you can have
[Bill:] Yeah I'm having this one, thank you.
[Oliver:] mummy.
[Nicola:] That's daddy's one.
[Oliver:] D'you want it?
[Bill:] I intended to give you a card on Saturday but I completely forgot.
[Oliver:] You
[Bill:] What are these?
[Nicola:] They're nice.
[Bill:] You haven't had one yet.
[Nicola:] Just look nice.
[Bill:] No, what are they.
[Nicola:] Can't have any more. They're daddies.
[Bill:] Mm. Lemon.
[Oliver:] I don't know what one I can have.
[Bill:] Have that one.
[Oliver:] I don't like those ones.
[Bill:] How do you know?
[Nicola:] We all like those.
[Oliver:] You naughty. You're a naughty, naughty daddy.
[Nicola:] I'm not.
[Oliver:] Yes you are. You eat all those
[Nicola:] They're daddy's
[Oliver:] You eat all my chocolates. I smack you.
[Nicola:] Go straight to bed. They eat my one, gonna eat this one so they mine.
[Oliver:] They'e not. You're gonna eat those all?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Are you?
[Nicola:] And so you're not. You have that one.
[Oliver:] That's daddy's one.
[Nicola:] I wanna
[Oliver:] Well eat it then. Don't hold it, eat it. You got that tape running?
[Bill:] Mhm?... You don't like it?... Spit it out then.... Spit it out in here.
[Oliver:] Give it to daddy then.
[Nicola:] So what did Janet say? Did she phone you?
[Oliver:] Well she phoned and umm... asked how Oliver was and everything and... just said oh how are you and I said oh I've... not been feeling very well over the weekend. So she said oh about three people who've had that, she said you have something to eat and you get pains and... it's obviously some sort of virus going round. She described exactly how I'd been feeling.... So umm... we was chatting... and I said oh it's your birthday on Sunday.... On Monday yeah and I said oh I'd like to see you I've got a present for you. Well I haven't at the moment, but I'm gonna get one.
[Nicola:] It's Janet's birthday next week.
[Oliver:] On Monday yeah. And I said oh I've got a present for you so I want to see you... give it to you. So she said come round to lunch on Wednesday. She said oh, umm she said oh when does Oliver go to nursery. I said Wednesday and Thursday she said he goes in the afternoons doesn't he. I said yeah. And she said oh Vicky goes in the afternoons too, d'you fancy coming round for lunch after you drop Oliver off on Wednesday.... So I said okay....
[Bill:] Er what's in there?
[Oliver:] I don't know. Probably the same as you just had.
[Bill:] A big chocolate.
[Oliver:] D'you want me to bite it and see?...
[Bill:] Take it out. Take it out, go on.
[Nicola:] all the same.
[Bill:] [spits]
[Oliver:] Are you eating it or not? No, give it to daddy then.
[Bill:] No, no, no, no, no.
[Oliver:] You don't want it Oliver.
[Bill:] I do.
[Nicola:] Here we are..... Very nice thankyou. [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] whaaaay [clapping]. Chilli con carne. That woman phoned about that job.
[Oliver:] Oh yeah.
[Nicola:] She's coming round on Wednesday to see me.
[Oliver:] Is she?
[Nicola:] Well about the job.... Oh, Ensla phoned up.
[Bill:] chocolates.
[Nicola:] There aren't any more, they're all gone.... Mhm. So umm...
[Bill:] [making noises]
[Oliver:] Scallywag! You're a scallywag.
[Bill:] You are.
[Nicola:] She said umm... oh where have you been! You haven't bee-. D'you want to do a pooey.
[Bill:] Na.
[Nicola:] Do you!
[Bill:] Noooo. No.
[Oliver:] If you don't
[Nicola:] She said umm oh wh- what's happened to you? I said what d'you mean. I thought oh my god we arranged to go round there for dinner or something, I'd forgotten. Oliver!
[Oliver:] That's enough for a minute. let me talk to mummy.
[Nicola:] Calm down!
[Oliver:] Let me talk to mummy.
[Nicola:] And umm... I said umm...
[Oliver:] Oh! Oliver! that's enough now. No more.
[Nicola:] I said what d-, what d'you mean. And she said ooh, haven't been round. I said well we've been very busy. Oh well what have you been doing?... Well... seeing a lot of people, going out and doing things and... I don't know, just been really busy. I said well you can always come round here. Well she said
[Oliver:] She said you can always come round here?
[Nicola:] No I said to her well you can always come here. She said where have you been! What happened to you!...
[Oliver:] So what d'you do, how d'you leave it?
[Nicola:] No I mean she just started, she opened the conversation like that. And we just chatted but you know she said like, I said oh hello she said hello it's Ensla, I said oh hello! So she said umm oh what happened to you!... What d'you mean.... I really thought she meant that we'd arranged to go round there and we hadn't gone or something. She said oh I haven't seen you. I said we've just been really busy. Dunno she wouldn't tell me.... Oliver, calm down darling. Come on.... I said oh if I'm in Beck and I've got a free couple of hours I'll come round but I don't think I'm going to this week....
[Oliver:] Why?
[Nicola:] Well tomorrow Anne's coming round. Wednesday I've got that woman coming round in the morning, take Oliver to nursery, pop round Janet's and then pick Oliver up from nursery.
[Oliver:] I thought you were going out with Janet.
[Nicola:] Well, I'd rather just go round there for an hour and sit there. Then... Thursday it's swimming, nursery, my dad's
[Oliver:] Swimming, nursery.
[Nicola:] coming round. Friday we're going round Clare's.
[Oliver:] You're going?
[Nicola:] Mm.... So you know it's all... I'm meant to be seeing that Heather one day this week but I haven't rung her. I mean today's the only day I've had free and the phone just hasn't stopped ringing. Ensla, Janet... ooh... you know what Ensla's like when she gets on the phone. My mum phoned, dad phoned. Well... yeah mum phoned again. Pardon?
[Oliver:] do one of them. called.
[Nicola:] Tape recorder. You turn it on and it tapes people singing or talking. And then when you turn it off you can replay it and you can hear yourself talk or sing.
[Oliver:] I want you to switch it on. And you can press the button like that.
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] go.
[Nicola:] Where's she going?
[Oliver:] She's going for a walk.
[Nicola:] She's gone to the shops.
[Oliver:] Yes. To buy a paper.
[Bill:] I posted that flym umm... edger trimmer... guarantee.
[Oliver:] What.
[Nicola:] Oh where's she going?
[Oliver:] I don't know.
[Nicola:] She is going
[Bill:] I don't know what time Anne said she was coming.
[Oliver:] you said get round as early as you can. Pop round as early as you can.
[Bill:] Three until twelve.
[Nicola:] Are you my friend now? Yes you are. Shall we be friends
[Oliver:] Don't want
[Nicola:] kiss and make up?
[Oliver:] No. No....
[Nicola:] Tetley make tea bags make tea. Tetley make tea bags make tea.
[Oliver:] Don't say that. That's naughty.
[Nicola:] Give me a cuddle.
[Oliver:] Nooo.
[Nicola:] Come on, be my friend. Be my friend.
[Oliver:] Ah, oh. Don't want to. Get off! Get off! I go sleep. Go sleep.
[Nicola:] Sit up, put a cushion behind you. sit up again. There we are. Is that better? Let me have a look at your hand.... I know, you hit me on the head.
[Oliver:] I tried to stop you.
[Nicola:] No you didn't.
[Oliver:] I did.
[Nicola:] No you didn't.
[Oliver:] You
[Nicola:] stopped pretty.
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Oh they've opened up already.. Nice, aren't they?
[Bill:] Now I've got to put them somewhere cool.
[Nicola:] Cool. bedroom. I got you, I got you. I get you. Get off.
[Oliver:] I wanna cuddle.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] I wanna cuddle. I want a cuddle.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] I want a cuddle. I want a cuddle. Please. I want a cuddle. I want a cuddle now.... The grand old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men, he walked them up to the top of the hill and back again. They was up they were up, and then when they down they were down. When they was only half way up they were neither up or down.... That's daddy, that's daddy's,.
[Nicola:] The grand old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men. He walked them to the top of the hill and then walked them down again. And when they were up they were up, and when they were down they were down, and half way up they were neither up or down. [sounds like he's got his mouth in oliver's stomach] The grand old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men,. When they were up they were up, when they were down they were down. When they were neither up or down. I got you. Ah, ah, ah ahah. [scream]
[Oliver:] Time out now cos daddy's having his coffee and its very very very hot.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] Right. Time out. I'm having my coffee now and it's hot.
[Nicola:] [screaming] [LAUGHTER]. Ahah, ahah.
[Oliver:] When you go to nursery you've gotta be a good boy otherwise Mrs M, Mrs Wilkins will tell you off. That's enough I'm having my coffee and it's hot.... The grand old Duke of York, he had ten thousand men, he marched them up to the top of the hill and he marched them down again. When they were up they were up, when they were down they were down, when they were only half way up they were only half way up they were neither up or down.
[Nicola:] When they were up they were up. When they were down they were down. When they were only half way up they were neither up or down.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] Right, be careful. Go and sit down.
[Oliver:] I feel sick.
[Nicola:] No you're not.
[Oliver:] [being sick noises]
[Nicola:] stay there, don't panic, don't panic. Don't panic. Lost your breath, have you lost your breath? Deep breaths, deep breaths go aah, ooh.
[Bill:] Is he alright?
[Nicola:] Yeah. Big, big breaths.
[Bill:] Sit down on daddy's lap.
[Nicola:] big breaths. Big breaths, go aah, ooh, aah, ooh.
[Oliver:] [choking]
[Nicola:] That's enough, that's enough. You choked.
[Bill:] Right. Get up! Get up and go and sit down.
[Oliver:] I want to be here.
[Bill:] Just sit down for ten minutes.
[Oliver:] I want to
[Bill:] Alright you can do your puzzle but just sit down and stop rushing around very very sick.
[Oliver:] Look daddy.
[Nicola:] Did you do that by yourself?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] That's a fireman!
[Oliver:] Mhm. Fireman Sam.
[Nicola:] And the fire engine. And a boy and a girl. What's the boy and girl doing?
[Oliver:] They got hats
[Nicola:] Perhaps...
[Oliver:] What daddy? What? What, what daddy? What daddy, what daddy.
[Nicola:] That's a fireman and that's a ladder.
[Oliver:] What's he gonna do with that ladder? What's he gonna do with his ladder?
[Nicola:] He puts it against a house and go up through the window.
[Oliver:] And what's he gonna put on there?
[Nicola:] The ladder.
[Oliver:] A ladder. What ladder?
[Nicola:] The ladder that the man's holding....
[Oliver:] What that one?
[Nicola:] What's the time? Sadie?
[Oliver:] What that one?
[Nicola:] Good heavens. Twenty to, yes that one. Where d'you want to go?
[Oliver:] Is Dave and Clare, oh Dave and Clare's not coming out with us are they?
[Nicola:] I don't know!. Why do you keep saying they're not? Why d'you keep saying that? Mhm.
[Oliver:] It's cos of Clare's mum then innit?
[Nicola:] Nooo! It's not.
[Oliver:] Or is it Jane?
[Nicola:] She's gonna ask Jane to babysit. Well I haven't seen her
[Oliver:] so if, if they, if sh- Jane come over she, we'll is that it?
[Nicola:] Why not ask them? Well what am I gonna say when they turn round on Friday and say oh we can come am I gonna turn round and say oh we don't want you to come out with us.... Why d'you keep asking me? Mhm. Willie?
[Oliver:] Ow!
[Nicola:] Willie! Why d'you keep saying the same things.
[Oliver:] Oh I'm sorry
[Nicola:] Well why do you keep saying it.?
[Oliver:] I dunno. Cos I'm
[Nicola:] You don't want them to come out?
[Oliver:] Yes!
[Nicola:] Well this is the fourth time Okay. I'm gonna say it once more I don't want to speak about it again. Last week I asked Clare... if they wanted to come out with us on Saturday. And if Jane could babysit because her mum can't because she's just come out of hospital. When she speaks to Jane, which will be over the weekend she'll ask her if she's doing anything on Saturday and if she'd like to babysit. If she will babysit then they will come out with us, if she can't babysit and they want to come out with us, and Dave, Clare will be able to tell me when I see her. Okay. I'm not going to tell you again. Did he find his other sword?
[Oliver:] No.
[Bill:] I think it's...
[Oliver:] Where's that piece of puzzle Oliver because... we keep losing things don't we? Come on, find the piece of puzzle please.... Oliver.
[Bill:] Yes mummy.
[Oliver:] Right. Come on. Give me that, now could you find the piece of puzzle that's missing then....
[Bill:] I
[Oliver:] You find the puzzle.
[Bill:] ... Where's
[Oliver:] Daddy's gone to have a shower.... Where was it? You found it.
[Bill:] Ummmmm. I think it was there somewhere.
[Oliver:] It's here, you found it. Did you want to have a shower with daddy?
[Bill:] Umm yes.
[Oliver:] Yes?
[Bill:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Come on then.
[Bill:] those on.
[Oliver:] Put your dungarees on. No, cos I want to keep them dry cos you can wear them tomorrow. Come here.
[Bill:] I wanna do them.
[Oliver:] No you come here and I'll do
[Nicola:] You're always complaining
[Bill:] No I'm not
[Nicola:] about everything I cook. It was nice except the courgettes. Next time you cook it can you leave out the leeks? It was nice but I didn't like the I always use to put onions in it always.
[Bill:] Up to
[Nicola:] Six months. But I
[Bill:] Six months?
[Nicola:] Yes but I decided I didn't like it so I didn't put in any. But when I didn't put any you said why can't we have it with the onions any more and I said you said it gave you indigestion.
[Bill:] Hm...
[Nicola:] In future you decide exactly what you want to eat and you tell me what you want in it.
[Bill:] I'm not moaning
[Nicola:] You are moaning
[Bill:] I'm not
[Nicola:] and its getting on my nerves.
[Bill:] I'm not I just asked why there's onions in it
[Nicola:] Because I always used to toss it in
[Bill:] So you just changed your mind and put it in
[Nicola:] I just decided to put it in to see if it tastes better. If it's a problem throw it all away. I'm sick to death of it.... and I put pasta and it was nice except...
[Bill:] I just asked a question. Don't carry on
[Nicola:] Well why did you say that the other day then? It was nice but the next time you do it can you not put such and such in it.
[Bill:] Yes well what is the point
[Nicola:] Well what is the point in me cooking? Oh yeah it was nice but I'd rather not have that in it. Why have we got that and that?
[Bill:] Two
[Nicola:] It's not Willie it's all the time every week you say something about something. You tell me what you'd like to eat exactly in future and if I feel like doing it I'll do it. And if I don't feel like doing it you can do something yourself.... Ah. Don't It's our anniversary Other people seem to... complain about their hangers multiplying whenever I've got hangers disappear. I've never got enough hangers to hand the clothes back up on the cable.... I don't know whether we should bring those plants in tonight because erm they reckon it's going to become frosty... those ones that we haven't planted yet... and the hanging baskets. Do you mind?
[Bill:] They're buying a... three bedroom place for the next they're just just going to move there just as they're going to have twins.
[Nicola:] That's all right. Three bedrooms isn't it?...
[Bill:] You're a very clever absolutely clever boy. Pat... you are a very Oliver.... [clapping]
[Nicola:] Whee!
[Bill:] You're clever aren't you?
[Nicola:] You're so clever.
[Bill:] Little boys can't do that can they?
[Nicola:] Only big boys.
[Bill:] Only big boys and clever boys. You're a clever boy.
[Oliver:] can do that.
[Bill:] Can they?
[Nicola:] But they're big boys
[Bill:] But they're big boys as well.
[Oliver:] Hm
[Bill:] But average boys can't do that can they? Because they're not as clever as you.
[Oliver:] they can do it
[Nicola:] How old are you Oliver?
[Oliver:] I am three.
[Nicola:] Three! And how old is Lucy?
[Oliver:] Uh... four.
[Nicola:] No she's two. Wrong way.
[Oliver:] What old and what old is.... What old is Leo?
[Nicola:] How old is Leo?
[Oliver:] Yes
[Nicola:] He's five.
[Oliver:] And what old...
[Nicola:] How old
[Oliver:] What old
[Bill:] How old? How old is Russell?
[Oliver:] How old is Russell?
[Nicola:] He's eight...
[Bill:] Eight!
[Oliver:] Eight.
[Bill:] He's a very big boy isn't he?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Bill:] I think you'd better get down now because you're going to hurt yourself.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] Hey don't up and down.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] You go and sit down.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] So they're not pleased then?
[Bill:] Well not really no.
[Nicola:] So what are they going to do? Not move into that house? And buy four bed
[Bill:] Well no. The contracts are signed now.... It's too late now
[Nicola:] Oh but when she was... How long was it since she worked at
[Bill:] How long since she was working
[Nicola:] It was a couple of months before that wasn't it?... that you said she was bleeding.
[Bill:] Yeah I think she was about four months pregnant.
[Nicola:] Yeah but she should have know ages ago that she was having twins. Hasn't she been to the hospital since or something?
[Bill:] No
[Nicola:] But she must have done. You go to antenatal
[Bill:] But that's all easy to say
[Nicola:] About once every month. They must have known for weeks.... Lucky them.... Do you remember that erm woman we saw in the park with those two little girls?
[Bill:] I remember them.
[Nicola:] Those twins.
[Bill:] They was nice.
[Nicola:] They were beautiful and she had two others didn't she?
[Bill:] No one.
[Nicola:] No she had two. One about Oliver's age and one about five. Because they were dressed identically. Didn't you see them?
[Bill:] Well I think she only had a girl.
[Nicola:] She had two girls.
[Bill:] Yeah four girls
[Nicola:] No two girls. They were twins in the buggy and then she had No. One was about three and one was about five. [1657 1] The little one that was standing next to the pram was about Oliver's age wasn't she? Maybe a bit older maybe four.
[Bill:] I remember seeing one and one she was pushing in front in the in the
[Nicola:] About Oliver's age. Yeah. Then she had an older one about five and a half... so she had four girls.
[Oliver:] Flintstones
[Bill:] girls.
[Nicola:] No twins were girls. They both had pink vests... Flintstones! They both had pink baby grows on.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] They were beautiful
[Bill:] babies
[Nicola:] Real model looking babies. I think with twins -even if they're not nice looking... just the fact there's two of them everyone thinks they're wonderful because there's two of them. That Richard next door looks just like...
[Bill:] I'm not sure. Cos his brother is quite a lot shorter than him. Or taller. Do they?
[Nicola:] He looks more English.
[Bill:] Did you him?
[Nicola:] No...
[Bill:] Do you want this T-shirt?...
[Nicola:] Well if you're not going to... I could wear it to work
[Bill:] Oh!
[Nicola:] I tell you what the sleeves will have to be altered
[Bill:] Why?
[Nicola:] I don't want to look like that. I tell you I'm not going to look like a bloody scruff at work.
[Bill:] Why?
[Nicola:] I'll wear some other different ones....
[Bill:] Well what's wrong with them. You haven't answered my question
[Nicola:] Nothing. But I mean
[Bill:] Well now don't be ridiculous! They're two years old maximum.
[Nicola:] What the er
[Bill:] The grey... yes. The most they are is two years old. Seven or eight years! You talk garbage.
[Nicola:] Plants are being nicely watered tonight.
[Bill:] Yeah.... Is it still raining?
[Nicola:] My. years.
[Bill:] Maybe some rain...
[Nicola:] End of September start decorating. The dining room and sitting room soon. And started to clear the furniture out and everything.
[Bill:] Hm
[Nicola:] They've lifted the carpet up and thrown it away and erm she said erm... Oh erm. We're going to have erm stained floor boards
[Bill:] Hm
[Nicola:] Floor boards are in a really good condition erm.
[Bill:] They better mind their overheads
[Nicola:] She said oh [LAUGHTER] you really aught to do it because my my it's such a good idea. Because you can get rugs so cheaply.
[Bill:] So what did he say?
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] So I said we have a house full of rugs because we had rugs we had tiles
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] We had either tiles or wooden floors all the way through
[Bill:] And
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Erm we are going to paint everywhere white. Erm because having erm light erm have coloured dark coloured walls is not a good idea. We really aught to have pale walls in most cases. She said when you decorate you really aught to erm
[Bill:] My
[Nicola:] Get rid... of erm... you really aught not to have dark walls you really aught to have erm pale we was going to paint the whole house white. Sort of like our erm like the most of our downstairs was in the other house apart from the sitting room, Yeah yeah yeah yeah. But she said but having white... you know most people you speak to say oh white you shouldn't have white because of this and because of that.
[Bill:] You see?
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] This this this
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Oliver! What are y'doing?
[Oliver:] I putting this hurting me.
[Bill:] I get blamed. 'Cause when you hurt yourself or I touch you... you go crying to mummy saying that daddy's hurt you don't you?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] I'll do it to Richard.
[Bill:] You go and do it to Richard next door.
[Oliver:] No.
[Bill:] Go and do it to Richard next door.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Oliver no screaming.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Willie don't make him scream.
[Bill:] Don't scream. Only girls scream. You're not a girl.
[Oliver:] Yes I am too
[Nicola:] You're a little girl?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Hm. All right then.Come on then up to bed..
[Oliver:] No.... I'm going to get on you.
[Bill:] he rolls around on me you know my cheeks my ears and my hair doesn't he?
[Nicola:] I don't know. He's never done it to me.
[Bill:] Oh! He's always done it to me...
[Nicola:] Oliver I don't understand why you haven't got your clothes on.
[Oliver:] Mm mm.
[Nicola:] It's not so cold now is it?
[Bill:] Hm.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER] mummy
[Bill:] Mummy!
[Nicola:] Come here get up.
[Bill:] Mummy!
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] Mummy! No!
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] What is he doing?...
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Stop that! Stop it I say!
[Oliver:] I hurt daddy. Cry! Cry!
[Bill:] [crying]
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER] daddy's crying now. Daddy's crying.
[Bill:] [crying]
[Oliver:] Daddy'crying.
[Bill:] I'll cry some more if you
[Oliver:] Why you cringing for daddy?
[Bill:] Because I'm happy [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] [sigh]
[Oliver:] That's
[Bill:] I'm happy. Oh [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Oliver will you stop that now.
[Oliver:] Leave me alone. Uh uh [crying]
[Nicola:] Don't be so rude.
[Oliver:] [crying]
[Nicola:] Sit down! Sit down!
[Oliver:] I want down
[Nicola:] Sit down.
[Oliver:] I wanna get down [crying]
[Nicola:] Now you are being a very very rude boy.
[Oliver:] I wanna be a good boy.
[Nicola:] Right then be a good boy then.
[Oliver:] [crying]...
[Nicola:] That's enough now. No that's enough. We don't want to hear any more.
[Oliver:] I won't cry. [crying]
[Nicola:] Come on. That is enough now.
[Oliver:] I won't cry.
[Nicola:] No there's no need to cry.
[Oliver:] I won't cry.
[Nicola:] You are being very rude.
[Oliver:] I won't cry.
[Nicola:] Right did you do a wee wee when you went upstairs with daddy?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Did he?
[Bill:] No.
[Nicola:] Right upstairs then and don't tell fibs.
[Bill:] Go upstairs and do wee wees.
[Oliver:] I don't want to do wee wee. I don't want to.
[Nicola:] Shall I put the heating on?
[Bill:] Hm please....
[Nicola:] Right lets go put your jim jams on come on.
[Oliver:] I want some
[Nicola:] What now?
[Oliver:] Smacks smacks.
[Nicola:] What smacks smacks.
[Oliver:] Hm
[Nicola:] What are you talking about?
[Oliver:] Yes smacks.
[Nicola:] Right. Upstairs 're n Bill you're teasing him.
[Oliver:] I want to sit over here.
[Nicola:] No you're not you sit with us.
[Oliver:] No I not I sit over here.
[Bill:] Do you mind and sit at the table
[Oliver:] I going to sit here.
[Nicola:] Look we have got special bread... now come on and sit at the table with us,
[Oliver:] I don't want to. I want to sit here.
[Nicola:] No. It's too messy to sit there. Come on you've got ketchup and you've got special your favourite bread... pitta bread.
[Bill:] Mm.
[Oliver:] No I going to sit here. I like to sit here.
[Nicola:] I know well you've had your breakfast and your lunch here. You can have dinner up here. Come on.
[Oliver:] I want to sit here.
[Nicola:] Well you'll have nothing then.... Go to bed. I am sick to...
[Oliver:] I am not playing...
[Bill:] Don't speak to him like that.
[Nicola:] Do you want daddy to do you some bread? Go and get your knife and fork... on your table Anybody like a drink?
[Oliver:] Mm. Yes.
[Bill:] Yes please. I'd like a beer please.
[Oliver:] May I have a drink please?
[Nicola:] Or would you like some bubbles?
[Bill:] I don't want Okay Daddy'll have bubbles
[Nicola:] You want bubbles?
[Oliver:] I had bubbles.
[Bill:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] I had bubbles.
[Bill:] You don't like bubbles?
[Oliver:] I like bubbles
[Bill:] Oh you like bubbles.
[Oliver:] No hate!
[Bill:] Oh you love bubbles.
[Oliver:] No hate.
[Nicola:] He hates bubbles.
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Bill:] Don't have any then.
[Oliver:] Yes I do. Yes I do
[Bill:] You do hate them so you're not having any.
[Oliver:] Yes I am 'cause I want some.
[Nicola:] Hate means you don't like lots.
[Oliver:] Like means you do like some.
[Bill:] You don't do that at the table boy!
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Bill:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Naughty bad boys. Oliver don't do it any more. Come on. No no no no.
[Bill:] If you do it... Oliver
[Nicola:] Come on put this glass down.
[Bill:] Stop it.
[Nicola:] Drink it...
[Oliver:] Can I get down
[Nicola:] What do you say? Willie Willie come on... Goodness me.
[Bill:] Willie Willie goodness me.
[Oliver:] Willie Willie
[Nicola:] Goodness me
[Bill:] How does Willie climb the tree?
[Oliver:] I'm gonna me.
[Bill:] Can he get up? No he can't. Willie Willie can you climb the tree?
[Oliver:] No he can't....
[Nicola:] Come on then. Football man.
[Oliver:] Hello
[Nicola:] There might be something I'd like to watch that comes on at ten o'clock.
[Oliver:] I like to watch
[Bill:] I think you'd like to watch nothing at all 'cause you have what you want on every day.
[Oliver:] No I want to see
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] I want to watch...
[Bill:] Is that bread in there?
[Nicola:] See I miss everything here...
[Bill:] Poor Mummy. Here you are Oliver.
[Oliver:] I like to watch Katy,
[Bill:] [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] I want to I want to watch there is a noise
[Bill:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] I want to watch Sword and the Stone
[Nicola:] Hm
[Bill:] Yes and Pinocchio and Scooby Doo and Robin Hood
[Oliver:] I don't like
[Bill:] And Batman and Robin and Rescuers and Ghostbusters. That's all you want to watch isn't it?
[Oliver:] Is it I don't I don't I don't like I don't like Robin
[Nicola:] Bruback... Brubaker's on at quarter to eleven.
[Oliver:] I don't like Sword and Stone
[Bill:] No
[Oliver:] Do they
[Bill:] Brubaker
[Nicola:] Brubaker
[Oliver:] They got no
[Nicola:] Robert Redford. Redford makes the most of his blue eyed integrity as a humane prison governor who reforms the place and discovers a nasty secret.
[Oliver:] ?
[Bill:] Yes
[Nicola:] You're always complaining
[Bill:] No I'm not
[Nicola:] about everything I cook. It was nice except the courgettes. Next time you cook it can you leave out the leeks? It was nice but I didn't like the I always use to put onions in it always.
[Bill:] Up to
[Nicola:] Six months. But I
[Bill:] Six months?
[Nicola:] Yes but I decided I didn't like it so I didn't put in any. But when I didn't put any you said why can't we have it with the onions any more and I said you said it gave you indigestion.
[Bill:] Hm...
[Nicola:] In future you decide exactly what you want to eat and you tell me what you want in it.
[Bill:] I'm not moaning.
[Nicola:] You are moaning.
[Bill:] I'm not.
[Nicola:] and its getting on my nerves.
[Bill:] I'm not. I just asked why there's onions in it.
[Nicola:] Because I always used to toss it in
[Bill:] So you just changed your mind and put it in.
[Nicola:] I just decided to put it in to see if it tastes better. If it's a problem throw it all away. I'm sick to death of it.... and I put pasta in and it was nice except...
[Bill:] I just asked a question. Don't carry on.
[Nicola:] Well why did you say that the other day then? It was nice but the next time you do it can you not put such and such in it.
[Bill:] Yes well what is the point
[Nicola:] Well what is the point in me cooking? Oh yeah it was nice but I'd rather not have that in it. Why have we got that and that?
[Bill:] Two
[Nicola:] It's not Willie it's all the time every week you say something about something. You tell me what you'd like to eat exactly in future and if I feel like doing it I'll do it. And if I don't feel like doing it you can do something yourself.... Ah. Don't It's our anniversary
[Oliver:] Can you read this one?
[Nicola:] Which one?
[Oliver:] Dummy.
[Nicola:] Which one's that?
[Oliver:] Ah Paddington Bear.
[Nicola:] Paddington Bear at Christmas time.
[Oliver:] And it's got lots and lots of letters.
[Nicola:] It has. Well would you like me to get you some breakfast first?
[Oliver:] Erm nice drink.
[Nicola:] A nice drink.
[Oliver:] Mm mm
[Nicola:] Well read this one then Mummy will get you some breakfast.... Okay. What's this one called Paddington's Magical Christmas.
[Oliver:] Mm
[Nicola:] One day not long before Christmas Paddington was busy doing his accounts when he heard Mrs Bird singing which was most unusual. As he listened to the words he nearly fell off his chair with surprise. It seemed her true love had sent her a present from a partridge in a pear tree. As it happened Paddington was having trouble about what to buy the Brown family for Christmas and he wished he'd thought of it himself.
[Oliver:] Which
[Nicola:] We'll find out in a moment. He hurried out into the garden but to his disappointment he couldn't see a pear tree anywhere let alone one with a partridge in it. He gazed hopefully at Mr Brown's apple tree. But apart from a few sparrows and a robin redbreast... the branches were bare. Paddington made his way back in doors. And no sooner was he inside when he heard Mrs Brown singing that her true love had sent four calling birds three french hens two turtle doves not to mention another partridge in a pear tree.
[Oliver:] Hm
[Nicola:] Paddington could hardly believe his ears and he hurried back outside as fast as he could go but once again he was too late. Even the sparrows and the robin redbreast had flown away and all that was left was one fat old pigeon sitting in the lawn. All the same Paddington decided to keep his eyes and ears open. Clearly there was something going on. Sure enough no sooner had he settled down it was Judy's time to break into song. This time she announced it wasn't Mrs Brown's four calling birds three French hens two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree she had been five gold rings. Paddington decided that Browns must have a very rich friend indeed if he could afford so many presents. It made his list look very small. He couldn't afford much more than a set of plastic rings let alone five gold ones. Over the next few days the mystery deepened. Seven swans swimming arrived and disappeared... again before Paddington had a chance to see them. He even tried looking in the oven but Mrs Bird drove him out of her kitchen with her feather duster.... Eight maids a milking came and went
[Oliver:] Where's he gone?
[Nicola:] But Paddington did find a note on the door step asking for two extra pints and things.
[Oliver:] Where's he gone Mummy?
[Nicola:] Hm table tennis. He began to wonder if he aught to ring for the police but no one else seemed to be in the slightest bit worried. When Paddington heard what Mrs Bird sang next. Nine ladies dancing he decided perhaps that she had ordered the extra milk in case they got thirsty. He searched the house from top to bottom. There was no sign of any body. Just as he was about to come downstairs he heard Jonathan singing. It seemed he had been sent no less than ten lords a leaping. Paddington decided to go see his friend Mr Grover who kept an antique shop in Portabello Road. Apart from all the antiques Mr Grover also had piles of books about every subject under the sun and Paddington felt sure he would be able to explain the mystery. As soon as Paddington arrived Mr Grover made some cocoa and they settled down on the horse hair sofa at the back of the shop. Tell me Mr Brown he said what is the problem. I can see that you are very worried about something. Mrs Bird has fallen in love with a very rich man who has lots of servants and keeps birds said Paddington. He sent all sorts of Christmas presents but as fast as they arrive they disappear. Mr Grover listened carefully as Paddington told him the story. I think Mr Brown he said at last if you go back to number thirty two Windsor Gardens you'll probably find that he has sent eleven as well. Paddington gazed at Mr Grover in astonishment. He was used to his friends knowing the answers to his problems but this was the fastest ever. He finished his cocoa as quickly as possible and he was about to leave when... to his surprise Mr Grover began pulling the blind down over his shop door. You see Mr Brown he explained they haven't really been getting presents. They've all been joining in singing a Christmas carol but you have given me an idea for your present but you'll have to hurry though -it's Christmas Eve. A lot of the shops will be closing early. Paddington trying to keep up with him Mr Grover lead the way along Portabello Road
[Oliver:] Who's that Mummy?
[Nicola:] That's Mr Grover. And as they weaved their way from the stores lining the streets he explained what he had in mind. Paddington grew more and more excited as he listened. I don'think I shall sleep very much tonight Mr Grover he said. Just leave it to me said Mr Grover I think between us and with the help of some of our friends in the market we shall be able to give everybody a Christmas to remember. Mr Grover was as good as his word and on Christmas morning soon after breakfast a very strange procession began making its way from the market.
[Oliver:] Where's which's Mr Grover?
[Nicola:] We'll find him in a moment. Towards number thirty two Windsor Gardens. On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love sent to me twelve drummers drumming eleven pipers piping ten lords a leaping nine ladies dancing eight maids a milking seven swans a swimming six geese are laying five gold rings four calling birds three french hens two turtle dove and a partridge in a pear tree. If you ask me said Mrs Bird as she invited every one in for a hot mince pies fresh from the oven that's the nicest start to a Christmas day any one can possibly wish for but then she added and with general agreement with a bear like Paddington about the house life is always full of surprises.
[Oliver:] Hm.
[Nicola:] Right let's get you a drink now and some nice cereal shall we?
[Oliver:] You read
[Nicola:] In a moment yes I will.
[Oliver:] What are these Mummy?
[Nicola:] They're biscuits.
[Oliver:] What biscuits are they?
[Nicola:] They're chocolate.
[Oliver:] I like these ones
[Nicola:] I'm sure you do but they're for later. Marching.
[Oliver:] Hm.
[Nicola:] Right are you going to sit down now. You're going to have your cereal now and then you're going to get dressed. Okay? I'm not going to...
[Oliver:] Whose birthday is it too?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] Whose is it birthday too?
[Nicola:] Oh somebody else having a birthday? Let's have a look.
[Oliver:] Whose having a birthday?
[Nicola:] Erm
[Oliver:] What's he know?
[Nicola:] That's Jenny.
[Oliver:] Jenny. What's she having?... What's they Mummy?
[Nicola:] They're blowers. Birthday blowers aren't they?
[Oliver:] Where's they came from?
[Nicola:] From party poppers. I think it's a birthday party for Oliver.
[Oliver:] It isn't
[Nicola:] Not for you. but for Oliver the little doggie in the book.
[Oliver:] What one... for that one?
[Nicola:] That's right. It's not a doggie is it?
[Oliver:] No
[Nicola:] Well who is it?
[Oliver:] It's it's not a doggie
[Nicola:] What is he?
[Oliver:] He... she's a doggie
[Nicola:] She's a doggie and what's he?
[Oliver:] Erm... he's Reefer.
[Nicola:] Mm and what is he?
[Oliver:] Erm
[Nicola:] A little boy?
[Oliver:] Erm es
[Nicola:] He's not he's a pussy cat.
[Oliver:] Mm a pussy cat.
[Nicola:] Isn't he.?
[Oliver:] Er what's that?
[Nicola:] Somebody's hand.
[Oliver:] Whose his hand?
[Nicola:] Erm 's hand.
[Oliver:] Mm
[Nicola:] Well have you finished your breakfast?... You haven't have you?
[Oliver:] Yes I have.
[Nicola:] Have some more breakfast and then I'll read you a story and then we'll go and get dressed. Come on.
[Oliver:] Oh. I've had enough. I is full up.
[Nicola:] You're full up?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Oliver don't be silly darling. Right are you watching Play Bus? No?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] That's very hot.
[Oliver:] No [crying] read a story []
[Nicola:] Well I can't read a story while the television's on. If you want to watch Play Bus you sit and watch it. If you want me to read you a story I turn Play Bus off.
[Oliver:] Mm read me a story.
[Nicola:] Right. I turn Play Bus off.... Okay. And as soon as we've read a story we'll get washed and dressed.
[Oliver:] Hm
[Nicola:] Okay. Have a nice shower and get dressed?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Right where are we sitting. In here where it's nice and sunny?
[Oliver:] Yes I's going to get all my books.
[Nicola:] No I'm not reading them all. I'm only reading one sweetheart only one.
[Oliver:] You read this one?
[Nicola:] Well just one please.
[Oliver:] You got one two three.
[Nicola:] I've got four haven't I?
[Oliver:] Mm you got four.
[Nicola:] Right which one do you want me to read? This one?
[Oliver:] I might read this if you read that.
[Nicola:] This one? I'll tell no! I'll tell you which one we'll read because we haven't read all the stories in this one have we?
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] We've only read the one about Earnest the elephant.... Right sit up on the chair and we'll read the story of the jumble sale.
[Oliver:] I can't see.
[Nicola:] No. Well you will be able to when I turn around. Your head?
[Oliver:] No my hands.
[Nicola:] Your hands. Right let's go upstairs and get dressed now.
[Oliver:] No no no no.
[Nicola:] Yes we've read all that. I said I'd read you a couple of stories. Up we go. Oliver leave Sammy alone.
[Oliver:] him
[Nicola:] No he doesn't want to be pushed around. Come on up you go.
[Oliver:] Does him wants to get dressed.
[Nicola:] Sammy doesn't wear clothes does he?
[Oliver:] No [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Well then silly boys.
[Oliver:] Oh no.... I carry Sammy. I carry him.
[Nicola:] No he doesn't want to be carried.
[Oliver:] I do.
[Nicola:] No he doesn't want to come upstairs. He's lying in the sun. Come on.... Come on.
[Oliver:] I want my
[Nicola:] I don't know where they are.
[Oliver:] I can't find them.
[Nicola:] All right we'll have a look later come lets get dressed now.
[Oliver:] I don't want to get dressed.
[Nicola:] Well you'll have to. You can't go out in your pyjamas.
[Oliver:] I not going anywhere. Well we have to go to the bank. I not going anywhere I said.
[Nicola:] Don't be rude.
[Oliver:] I not being rude.
[Nicola:] Don't be cheeky.
[Oliver:] I not being cheeky.
[Nicola:] You are being very cheeky.
[Oliver:] I'm not. Who who bought this?
[Nicola:] Mummy and daddy bought it.
[Oliver:] Where did it came from?
[Nicola:] It comes from the Gap
[Oliver:] It came from... one boy's garden.
[Nicola:] Don't be silly. How can a sweat shirt come from a garden?
[Oliver:] It came from some boy's garden. I told you that.
[Nicola:] And she's bringing Alia and Adem to play with you... We're just going to Beckenham because we have to go to a shop there.
[Oliver:] What shop?
[Nicola:] A clothes shop.... and we need to go to the bank too.
[Oliver:] What was that noise Mummy?
[Nicola:] It's that big digger. Digging up the road all over the place.
[Oliver:] What's in the road?
[Nicola:] No. The big digger is holding up all the traffic.... There's no [sigh] [yawn]
[Oliver:] Where's that way... Mummy?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] There's a big digger there.
[Nicola:] Hm
[Oliver:] Hm it's a big one there.... What's that digger digging?
[Nicola:] He's digging up the road. Don't know why. Probably because the road's all bumpy and they have to make it nice and smooth again What would you like to do have a nice sandwich for lunch and then later on have something proper.
[Oliver:] I don't want something yet.... Can we see a
[Nicola:] It's not there any more darling...
[Oliver:] Is that a sheep down there.
[Nicola:] I think the sheep have gone now. I don't think there using sheep any more. Pardon darling?
[Oliver:] What are you finding?
[Nicola:] What am I finding?
[Oliver:] Hm.
[Nicola:] Do you mean what am I waiting for?
[Oliver:] Hm
[Nicola:] Well the traffic lights are red. What does red mean?
[Oliver:] Erm... what does green mean?
[Nicola:] What does green mean?
[Oliver:] Erm... go.
[Nicola:] Green means go. That's right so what does red mean?
[Oliver:] Red means erm
[Nicola:] Green means go so red means stop.
[Oliver:] Why we going home?
[Nicola:] Why we going home?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Alia and Aden are coming around to play with you this afternoon.
[Oliver:] Are they coming now?
[Nicola:] In a minute....
[Oliver:] In a minute?
[Nicola:] Hm hm.
[Oliver:] Look at all those clouds.
[Nicola:] I know it's a nasty day isn't it?
[Oliver:] Hm. It burns your eyes.
[Nicola:] Come on then upstairs...
[Oliver:] I do want to
[Nicola:] I'll find it for you in a moment. Go upstairs. Take your shoes off...
[Oliver:] Here. I stay down here.
[Nicola:] No because you've got to change your clothes....
[Oliver:] Please can I?
[Nicola:] I will once you've been upstairs to change your clothes.... Stop being so silly. Now go upstairs now. Pick that up. Pick that up this minute. Now go upstairs now please.... Come on upstairs and stop being so silly.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER].
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] I want them.
[Nicola:] You want stem?
[Oliver:] No I want them.
[Nicola:] Well they're coming soon....
[Oliver:] I want them
[Nicola:] No because that's very very dangerous.
[Oliver:] Why's it dangerous?
[Nicola:] Because their springs and springs can hurt you....
[Oliver:] They can't
[Nicola:] Right.. Come on then
[Oliver:] What's it called Mum?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] What 's that called?
[Nicola:] That's called that what
[Oliver:] Are these
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] It's my toy.
[Nicola:] I know darling but no
[Oliver:] It fell down... I am not in it.
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] I am not in this book.
[Nicola:] I can't understand you
[Oliver:] I can show you.
[Nicola:] You can show me?
[Oliver:] In this book.
[Nicola:] You can show me whose in this book? Yes you can as soon as you're dressed can't you?
[Oliver:] Hm [LAUGHTER]...
[Nicola:] Come to Mummy.
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] Come on then.
[Oliver:] You can't get me. Hee hee.
[Nicola:] Come on then. Lets wash your face.
[Oliver:] Hm. Poo Poo.
[Nicola:] That's a silly noise.
[Oliver:] Yes. Trying to get away from my face.
[Nicola:] You're trying to get away from your face?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] That's making a fuss aren't you?
[Oliver:] Do you hurting me?
[Nicola:] I am not hurting you. I am giving you a wash.
[Oliver:] Where's that bear?
[Nicola:] I don't know is that a king?...
[Oliver:] Not a king. Why you saying that?
[Nicola:] come on.
[Oliver:] what you put in there.? hat you put in there.?
[Nicola:] I can't understand you Oliver when you're mumbling.
[Oliver:] What you mean?
[Nicola:] Come on stop
[Oliver:] Why you in there?
[Nicola:] Who is in there? Or why are they in there?...
[Oliver:] Where are they?
[Nicola:] In there. In the cage.
[Oliver:] How are they in cage?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] How did they get in the cage?
[Nicola:] How did they get in the cage? They just walked in.
[Oliver:] Mm Where's Oliver gone?
[Nicola:] Where's Oliver gone?
[Oliver:] He is in.
[Nicola:] Making tape. [LAUGHTER] Oliver doesn't do his jumper [LAUGHTER] There he is. There's Oliver. Do you like your nice new sweat suit.
[Oliver:] Who bought it?
[Nicola:] Mummy and Daddy bought it.
[Oliver:] Why's the tape on?
[Nicola:] I'm sure erm why... I don't know. It comes from the gap.
[Oliver:] It comes from the... boy's garden.
[Nicola:] Don't be silly. How can a sweat shirt come from a garden?
[Oliver:] It came from that boy's garden. Like I told you that... You're a Peter Pan. You look like Peter Pan. You look like Peter Pan. Don't you?
[Nicola:] Hm mm
[Oliver:] You do look like Peter Pan.
[Nicola:] Do I?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] I haven't finished getting you dressed. I haven't. because your jumping. Your sweat shirt isn't tucked in.
[Oliver:] Is it in now?
[Nicola:] Now at the neck. Don't run away. Oh. Oliver come on sweetie. Come on darling..
[Oliver:] Where's Oliver gone?
[Nicola:] Where's Oliver gone?
[Oliver:] Here he is.
[Nicola:] Here he is. You have to until you combed your hair.
[Oliver:] That's enough. That's enough. That's enough. I said that's enough.
[Nicola:] I know what you said but it isn't even dried yet.
[Oliver:] [crying]
[Nicola:] Don't be such a big baby.
[Oliver:] [crying] you hurt me. []
[Nicola:] It's done now.
[Oliver:] Leave me alone.
[Nicola:] I will leave you alone now.
[Oliver:] Let me go on my own...
[Nicola:] Right off we go.
[Oliver:] Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jill fall down and broke his crown Jack and Jill went to hill to fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.
[Nicola:] Are you gonna have a major pig out on biscuits, or are you gonna wait and have your dinner? Or just eat biscuits and have no dinner?
[Oliver:] No. I'd sooner have dinner.
[Nicola:] We've got this. What d'you want with it? Salad or... or potatoes and peas.
[Oliver:] [sigh] Umm.... I might have some salad.
[Nicola:] D'you want it now?
[Oliver:] Mm. Please. Joe le Taxi!.
[Nicola:] I phoned up some more umm schools.
[Oliver:] Uhuh.
[Nicola:] Got an appointment to see one of them.
[Oliver:] Have you?
[Nicola:] Umm, on the eighteenth of June.
[Oliver:] What one?
[Nicola:] Mead. Mead Road. Which is actually in Chislehurst, I think it's up near The Bull somewhere.... You know the big Young's pub.
[Oliver:] Oh yeah.
[Nicola:] I think it's up there somewhere I'll have to look on the map.
[Oliver:] Is it a private?
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] It's a state school?
[Nicola:] Mhm. Well I don't know yet whether were going to be able to afford it or not do we? So we have got his name down at a few schools
[Oliver:] Just in case.
[Nicola:] and then if we can afford to send him privately we can just take his name off.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Just don't send him but if we can't afford it then, we just don't know what's gonna happen do we?
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] But at least then we're gonna be ready aren't we if we put his name down at four or five schools in the area. If we get two or three places then we can choose the best one.
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Then, that's it, it's done. You know it's sorted out.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] And if we can afford to send him to Bishop Challener or wherever then... I mean if we can't, thing is at Bishop Challener we wanted to ge- reserve a place now and just pay fifty pounds. If we don't send him we don't get it back. And what we could do is keep him at Saint Christopher's if we can afford to send him privately, keep him at Saint Christopher's for a couple of years. Then get him into Bishop Challener as soon as they've got a place.
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] But if we can't then we take him out of Saint Christopher's next year and put him in a state school. It all, just all depends and a year's a long time isn't it? Just wait and see what happens, you don't know, it all depends on you doesn't it. If you go away then as soon as you know that you're going we'll send off registration for Bishop Challener and that's it and we can send off a year's... a year's umm fees in advance can't we?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] No problem. The best thing to do would be to put away five years' worth of umm fees in a high interest building society account and just have a direct debit taken out every term... and the fees to go out wouldn't it. Cos if we put sort of ten thousand away the interest would be paying for the fees all the time wouldn't it? Eh?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] That would be the best thing. It would be just done and done with then and there would be no question of not being able to afford it would there? Just wait and see what happens. I'm just gonna ring up cos mum couldn't get through yesterday so she's given me her credit card number to order things. One of the schools that phoned up, Scotts Avenue or Scotts Park wear a really nice uniform, saw a little girl when I was out today.
[Oliver:] Did you?
[Nicola:] Red and white check dress she had on and a big red sweatshirt with Scotts Park on the front.
[Oliver:] Oh you told me yesterday, yeah.
[Nicola:] See another one out there today. Red blazer she had on. Didn't see any boys. Probably grey and red or navy and red. It's nice having a sweatshirt.
[Oliver:] Mhm. D'you want a smoke?
[Nicola:] Mm. Oliver! Don't go to sleep darling cos your pizza's nearly ready.
[Oliver:] Has he been busy?
[Nicola:] Well we were rushing around. Ali came about two I suppose and she's only just gone....
[Oliver:] How's Odem?
[Nicola:] He's lovely. Did you have a bit of rain?
[Oliver:] Well it was raining when they came. And then it really brightened up. Anne wanted to look round the garden so
[Nicola:] Did she like the garden?
[Oliver:] Mm. She thought it was lovely. She said a couple of those tall things are umm are weeds. Foxgloves which are poisonous.
[Nicola:] Yeah?
[Oliver:] And... maybe if you feel up to it one evening this week you could go round and give it a dig up.... I mean if I tell you where I want dug over, then if you're not working at the weekend, we can umm... dig everything over and then, cos I mean that area down there, it would take no time at all for you to pave.
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] You don't have to concrete them in, just put them in sand like you did before.... Like you did under the pagoda. Cos anyway we used to walk on those and sit under there and it wasn't, didn't move did it?
[Nicola:] Did she like me barbecue?
[Oliver:] Mm. She said oh been saying he's gonna build one for five years but he's never got round to it....
[Nicola:] And she likes the house?
[Oliver:] Yeah. She's definitely gonna have umm... a conservatory put on. At the moment they use their sitting room umm as just somewhere to put... toys and washing and, just haven't decorated it or anything the dining room is still used like a living room, and what they really need is another room where they can. Cos all their bedrooms are used up so they haven't got. What they really need is another room where they can put... like the bigger toys you know.
[Nicola:] Cos she said, didn't she say she wanted to move again?
[Oliver:] They do want to move, but just can't afford it.... Because she doesn't earn much.... Doesn't earn much at all considering she works three days a week.
[Nicola:] Ahmet don't earn a great deal does he?
[Oliver:] He doesn't. No he brings home less than two hundred pounds a week. And he hasn't got a company car like you. She's got a Fiesta.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Y reg.
[Nicola:] Mm.Mm.
[Oliver:] Same colour as the one they sold to.
[Nicola:] Yeah....
[Oliver:] I think they bought it with his redundancy money didn't they?
[Nicola:] I don't know.... Where's the flowers upstairs.
[Oliver:] I put them on the umm... landing window. They look really nice cos of the red curtain. I brought them down here but there isn't anywhere to put them....
[Nicola:] Does Ann like it round here?
[Oliver:] Mm.... Mm she loved the garden.... She said oh it makes our house and garden seem so small.... she said I can't let them do playdo I can't let them do painting she's just got nowhere to let them do anything.
[Nicola:] Mind you, if we went back in our house now it would look so much smaller wouldn't it?
[Oliver:] Yeah but we had the conservatory didn't we?
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] And I said to her having the conservatory does give you... a lot more extra space. But then we've always had a spare bedroom haven't we, only having the one child.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] Whereas they've had both bedrooms full up.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] I mean Alia will be three in January.
[Nicola:] Cor she's a right busy isn't she?
[Oliver:] Oh god! She's like a whirlwind. She's on the table ooh like this she's oh what's that and pull that down. Oh what's that. She just doesn't stop, under the table she said oh what's that card and the jug nearly came down. And she's tipping the chalk out and she said what's that, oh that's the phone, under the table, pulled the rocking horse out. Oh look at that picture. And she just doesn't stop. She emptied the whole toybox out.
[Nicola:] Ann can't control her can she?
[Oliver:] She doesn't try very hard.
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] Went out in the garden and she's got a bike out and the scooter and the, and she's in the house now and she's just. She was almost in the pond. And Ann said come away. No I'm just looking. She, she wouldn't do it, she wouldn't come away. And Ann just, oh... you'll fall in....
[Nicola:] What about Odem? Was he playing?
[Oliver:] Mhm. He just laughs all the time.
[Nicola:] I know.
[Oliver:] They're really messy children. They dribble.... I don't know whether it's cos they're so sort of worked up that they've got no control over what they're doing but... umm.... You gonna have your pizza? Are you?
[Nicola:] You keep him awake.
[Oliver:] Pardon? Don't be so nasty to mummy. I'll put his jamas on I think
[Bill:] Go away.
[Nicola:] Go away.
[Oliver:] Daddy wants to, daddy wants to sit and watch your video with you.... No, come on, no noise thank you.
[Nicola:] Be a nice boy.
[Oliver:] Don't aggravate him. Please.
[Nicola:] Did you have a busy afternoon with Alia?... Oh you them socks on last night. Didn't you? Cor! Poo! Stinky!. Touche.
[Bill:] Oliver!
[Nicola:] What's this video called? Lady and the Tramp?
[Oliver:] It's called
[Nicola:] Is it? I haven't seen this one before.
[Oliver:] You don't do you?
[Nicola:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] You don't do you?
[Nicola:] No I don't. Merlin.
[Bill:] Mad.
[Nicola:] Oh Mad Maid of. I like Merlin.
[Oliver:] D'you like.
[Nicola:] Do I like? What is that?
[Bill:] The owls.
[Nicola:] Yes I do.
[Oliver:] King Arthur.
[Nicola:] King Oliver?
[Bill:] King Arthur!
[Nicola:] King Arthur.... King Arthur.
[Oliver:] He's got magic.
[Nicola:] Has he? I heard that you had a nice little lay in this morning. In bed, did you, yes. You had a nice long sleep. Is that right? Where they going?
[Oliver:] They're going... they're flying.
[Nicola:] And what, what house he going?
[Oliver:] I don't know what house they're going to.
[Nicola:] They're going
[Oliver:] Daddy could do with a nice little doze I know that.
[Bill:] Doze?
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Bill:] Nearly ready.
[Oliver:] Half an hour that takes doesn't it?
[Nicola:] Where're we going on Saturday? I don't know darling. You name a place and we'll go.... [banging] Ooh Oliver....
[Oliver:] birds isn't it?
[Nicola:] What's that bird called?
[Oliver:] That's
[Nicola:] Oh is it?
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Oh I like her.
[Oliver:] I don't.
[Nicola:] Don't you? Why don't you like her?
[Oliver:] She's being nasty.
[Nicola:] Why is she being nasty?
[Oliver:] don't like her.
[Nicola:] Why is she being nasty?
[Oliver:] That's why I don't like her.
[Nicola:] What be-, because she's nasty?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Oh I see. Come on darling. Well sit here then. No, you're not laying there and eating your dinner. Come and sit down here....
[Oliver:] It's hot.
[Nicola:] It isn't hot I've let it cool down. Come on. Pardon? Come on darling look. You eat this pizza. Come on, you've asked for it. I not hungry.
[Oliver:] You don't want it?
[Bill:] Give it to daddy then, daddy eat it.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Bill:] Don't you want it?
[Oliver:] Are you sure?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Cos I'm not going to do you anything else.... Well come on, get off. Get off I said! Right! Get upstairs! Get up, up those stairs! I'm sick to death of you being rude to me.... The swords are going in the bin.
[Nicola:] I didn't realise this programme was still running?
[Oliver:] It's so boring. [eastenders music]. Aah watching television was so exciting....
[Nicola:] no films on.
[Oliver:] Sam, why don't you go and chase frogs?... He spends almost his whole time sitting by the pond.
[Nicola:] Does he?
[Oliver:] . I haven't seen it since.... We got that woman coming tomorrow about umm next job.... Yeah. I think she said half eleven....
[Nicola:] You never know.
[Oliver:] She said there wasn't anything at the moment. She wanted to come and see me anyway so she's got all my details on record.
[Nicola:] Always makes me laugh the way he sounds so surprised that... announcing record profits and asking customers to pay more. How are they making record profits? By customers paying more. Mm?
[Oliver:] profits on?
[Nicola:] Water board.
[Oliver:] Oh.
[Nicola:] Oh do wake up!
[Oliver:] Well I didn't know you know!
[Nicola:] Well I only just heard it on the news. I hurt my shoulder when I was having a shower.
[Oliver:] Did you? How did you do that?
[Nicola:] I don't know. I think I must have... twisted round to get the shampoo awkward....
[Oliver:] Is the heating on?
[Nicola:] No, I haven't put it on. You cold?
[Oliver:] No but it's gonna get, it's getting cold now cos the temperatures are really gonna drop tonight. Dropping down about two or three degrees....
[Nicola:] I don't think it's cold at all. My teddy bear
[Oliver:] You want your teddy?
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] Now what were you doing in mummy and daddy's bed?
[Nicola:] Ah. I dunno.
[Oliver:] You don't know? You woke up didn't you and came into mummy and daddy's bed. And what's this? What's that?...
[Nicola:] Let me have a look see what's in this page. Look no page, look.
[Oliver:] Nothing on that page. That's a new book for you, isn't it.
[Nicola:] What's he got mummy?
[Oliver:] He's got a baseball bat.
[Nicola:] He got baseball bat as well. What'll they do with baseball bat?
[Oliver:] Well I should imagine they're playing baseball.
[Nicola:] Ohh. Mummy, who's that?
[Oliver:] What darling?
[Nicola:] Who's that? And the Joker.
[Oliver:] Oh! Batman and the Joker.
[Nicola:] And the Joker. I don't like the Joker.
[Oliver:] Don't you? Alright which cereal would you like for breakfast?... Come and choose one then.
[Nicola:] I don't like it.
[Oliver:] You've got to have some cereal. Get hungry.
[Nicola:] I won't get hungry.
[Oliver:] You must be hungry, you hardly had any dinner last night.
[Nicola:] There we are.
[Oliver:] Mummy look. They got saucer in this.
[Nicola:] The saucer in that one. You've got that story already haven't you?
[Oliver:] Mm. two ones aren't I.
[Nicola:] No. There we are. Sit down in the corner nice breakfast. You must be a hungry boy. Well it doesn't matter you can look at it afterwards.. Be careful. Don't get it in your breakfast. It's a new book isn't it?... Well look, if we put teddy on there okay. Put teddy like that..... Here, have your breakfast then we'll have a nice bath cos mummy's got a lady coming to see her today about a job. I'm full up now.
[Oliver:] Oh you can't be full up.
[Nicola:] I am.
[Oliver:] You can't be. Ah. Finish some more cereal you must be a hungry boy. And, d'you know where you're going today?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Where are you going today?
[Nicola:] I don't know.
[Oliver:] You don't know then do you? You're going... to... nursery!...
[Nicola:] take my cones.
[Oliver:] Oh you can take your cones if you want to.
[Nicola:] I will take my lunch box.
[Oliver:] You want to take your lunch box too?. I want a cuddleee. Oh oooh.. Ooooh. What would you like to do today?
[Nicola:] I like toys.
[Oliver:] You like toys?
[Nicola:] And I like swords.
[Oliver:] Right let's take this nappy off.
[Nicola:] I take my books as well.
[Oliver:] Well I don't think you ought to take your books to nursery do you? They might get lost. I tell you what you can take. You can take those umm... those facey yoghurt pots can't you. The ones with the umm daffy duck on the front. You can take them in to Mrs Wilkins and maybe she could do something with them. Do you want to put everything in your lunch box ready?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Yes. Shall we do that now?
[Nicola:] Yes. Please.
[Oliver:] Get your lunchbox then.... Which one are you taking, the turtle one?
[Nicola:] Dunno what's in here?
[Oliver:] What's in your lunchbox. Oh your flask. Right get the stool then you can help mummy put the things in here that you want.
[Nicola:] Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. Eee.
[Oliver:] That's it.... Right, now what d'you want to put in here?
[Nicola:] All of it
[Oliver:] Shall we take those in to nursery?
[Nicola:] Put those in there. there.
[Oliver:] Oh, oh, no. Oh no..... That's it shall we put all those in there?... And take all those to nursery, now what else did you want to take? Nothing else in here.
[Nicola:] I want take umm.
[Oliver:] What did you want to take, your cones? Well I thought we'd keep those because then you won't have any will you? So if we keep those here,
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] and then you can have those. And these we can take to nursery and we can leave them at nursery can't we? So all the other boys and girls can see them too.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Okay?
[Nicola:] I want those ones.
[Oliver:] No we'll leave those here because then we can play with them here can't we? Do you want to take some cones to nursery?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] Go and get your basket of cones then.
[Nicola:] Where they gone?
[Oliver:] There in front of you. There look.... Very careful, good boy.
[Nicola:] We
[Oliver:] Well if we can put them in little bags, ooh
[Nicola:] Oooh.
[Oliver:] Right get up back on the stool then.
[Nicola:] Yeah....
[Oliver:] If we put them in little bags... I think there's some more in the grass outside. See if we can collect some more before we
[Nicola:] Go and get some more.
[Oliver:] Well you'll have to go and get some shoes to put on.
[Nicola:] I'm going to put some wellingtons on.
[Oliver:] Well go and get your wellies then. D'you want me to help you?
[Nicola:] Yes. Are here....
[Oliver:] Right, as soon as we've done this then we'll have to go and have a, you can have a bath and mummy can have a shower because I've got a lady coming to see me about a job.
[Nicola:] What job?
[Oliver:] Well I don't yet she's gonna come round and see me to tell me what sort of job. And then... when she's gone
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] I'll take you to nursery. Okay?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] We're not staying outside thought cos it's cold.
[Nicola:] Well shall we keep some at home?
[Oliver:] No
[Nicola:] Well you've got lots in there. I don't think there'll be any room on the table. Will there?...
[Oliver:] Can't I put them on desk? put them
[Nicola:] On the desk? Well you've got to take these as well look.
[Oliver:] Ooooooh.
[Nicola:] D'you want to put that on the desk as well?
[Oliver:] Alright then.... read book
[Nicola:] Well, gonna eat your breakfast?
[Oliver:] Read book first.
[Nicola:] No, if you're not going to eat your breakfast then we'll go and have a bath and then I'll read you a story. Okay? Come on then. Quick.
[speaker005:] Pardon?
[Oliver:] They my friends.
[Nicola:] Who are your friends?
[Oliver:] My friends at nursery.
[Nicola:] What are their names?
[Oliver:] Umm. I don't know what are their names.
[Nicola:] You don't what your friends names are?... Right, well we'll park the car and we'll go off to buy you a doughnut....
[Oliver:] Where shall we park?
[Nicola:] Well
[speaker005:] I'm full up now.
[Oliver:] Are you?
[Nicola:] I'm full up now.
[Oliver:] Well put the gingerbread man back in the bag then. Don't you want to keep your umm... doughnut until you get home and you can have a nice drink?... D'you have a drink when you're at nursery? Did you? What drink did you have? You had some milk?
[speaker005:] what's this?
[Oliver:] Don't know.... It's about cowboys isn't it? Don't know what the programme's called.... Story about cowboys, horses.
[Nicola:] And that horse's got lost.
[Oliver:] Oh did he?
[Nicola:] And and he don't know where to go.
[Oliver:] Oh.
[Nicola:] And he, and he fall down.... And
[Oliver:] Pardon?
[Nicola:] What's cowboys got? What've they got?
[Oliver:] What cowboys? Umm... horses and hats... and guns.
[Nicola:] And what guns do?
[Oliver:] Well guns are very, very nasty.
[Nicola:] They go peeow peeow.
[Oliver:] Peel peel [LAUGHTER].
[Nicola:] They say
[Oliver:] Do they?
[Nicola:] and they come out with the gun.
[Oliver:] Look, they're on the horses now....
[Nicola:] Where they going now mum.
[Oliver:] They're going to find all the cows.
[Nicola:] Mum, what's that man talking about? Mummy.
[Oliver:] Pardon darling.
[Nicola:] Wh-, what's he talking for.
[Oliver:] Well he's talking to the good man, isn't he....
[Nicola:] He say. He's a good man. He's a good man isn't he?
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] . Got a gun. Mum, what's he got on his neck?
[Oliver:] He's got a scarf. Yes darling.
[Nicola:] Mum where's my painting?
[Oliver:] I put it away darling I thought you'd finished.... You can do some painting when you go to nursery can't you?
[Nicola:] go to nursery.
[Oliver:] Don't pull your jumper darling, please.
[Nicola:] It's coming on!
[Oliver:] Well watch it then....
[Nicola:] Mm.... mummy
[Oliver:] Yeah, give me those scissors, you're not rushing around with those.... Are you eating this yoghurt?
[Nicola:] What's that mummy? Bang.... Umm, what we do, we're owned by Grattans. We deliver parcels, all parcels for Grattans... and we also deliver for the Next Directory as well. And it's self employment so the couriers that we er supplied with the parcels with are... the p- umm er, they're liable for tax and insurance if any is due, I mean earn a certain amount of money before you start
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] and the rest of it's up... That is something that you'd have to find out
[Oliver:] But you are the
[Nicola:] Who me?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] No, I'm o, I I'm employed by Grattans, and Grattans employ. Anyway Grattan owns the courier.
[Bill:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] We own the depots. In fact we could be called Grattan... Couriers but... we call it, we're called Direct Line. Grattan Direct Line and we're just like a company Grattan but Grattan own it sort of thing and... basically what it is, it's a daily delivery to the door.
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] And we work in postcode areas.
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] And we, well we work it all into sections so that in your postcode, in V R 1
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] it's divided... [paper rustling] [LAUGHTER] much easier to show you I think. Right, take V R 1, okay it's that big slash line round there, in there.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Okay? Now in V R 1 split up into five pieces. postcodes V R 1 one something something, two something something, three or whatever. Okay? Now what we try and do is to put into sectors.
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] So what we'll look at and say right, how many are going there, how many are going there. Right there's enough parcels to make a nice little round so and she does that round.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Got another lady that goes to those two bits. Another lady she'll have that, you see. So we look at the rounds as being twenty to thirty parcels a day give or take. Some day it might be a bit less other days it will be more thirty umm but on an average we like to work out the girls to about thirty to twenty five a day. Which, when you look at it into time and money, yes we pay forty pence flat a parcel but the girls can go out, once they, once they know their area, they know the roads and they know where they are... they can go out and probably do about twenty parcels an hour.... When you forty pee it's like eight pounds
[Oliver:] Yeah it's a lot of money per hour.
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] work.
[Nicola:] That's it.
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] So, you work it out take home an hour but to be realistic you've gotta take petrol out of it. So let's just say, six pounds and costs because every day you know
[Oliver:] Mm. You're using your car.
[Nicola:] That's it. And you might be buying a sandwich, something like that so... realistically should be able to come out presuming twenty parcels in about an hour then get about five pounds.... That's realistically.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Er... obviously when you first start... and Kim found this as well, when she first started
[Oliver:] Well she said she, well let's be honest, she really hated it
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] She was going, she didn't know where she was
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] taking up most of her day. And then it just depended, it's up to you to get yourself so if you know you're going, well say I was doing Hayes. If I was going to see a friend in Hayes I would be crazy not to
[Nicola:] Deliver parcel [LAUGHTER]
[Oliver:] on the way.
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] But it's... why do two journeys.
[Nicola:] Yeah. People do fit it in around themselves. Umm... we get some people, when I went to see Kim, d'you know where this is. Oh yeah I know where all my roads are. And... you don't, I mean you think you do. But it's a case of, I've seen that
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] you know and it gets really frustrating. And like... Kim'll be the first one to say... she gave up after a few months
[Oliver:] Mm. Yeah.
[Nicola:] and said no, I can't do it. Then, she thought about it
[Oliver:] Realised.
[Nicola:] and said oh I did all the hard bit cos she did Christmas and remember that snow!
[Oliver:] Snow, yeah.
[Nicola:] She said really she did all the hard work, and then it became easier.
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] And, she's taken back on and she's okay now.
[Oliver:] Yeah I mean when I saw her round the park she said oh I'm really enjoying it this
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER] I really felt for her actually in the snow.
[Oliver:] You know it's, it's the money I mean why is anybody doing anything
[Nicola:] That's it. I mean however much you like doing something you wouldn't do it if you did it for nothing.
[Oliver:] No. No when you've got kids unless you're... unless you go back to work properly
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] You're earning a lot of money
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] you can't really, there's no point in childminding and nannies because your earnings
[Nicola:] Yeah. Well you've got to be able to earn double, treble
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] to make it w-, to make it, to make it worthwhile.
[Oliver:] Yeah. And if you make the conscious decision to stay at home... then...
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] I mean I've stayed at home for nearly four years now.
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] cos I'm not suddenly gonna to say to somebody now
[Nicola:] That's it.
[Oliver:] started school
[Nicola:] That's right.
[Oliver:] I enjoy it too much.
[Nicola:] Does he go every afternoon or
[Oliver:] No. Just two afternoons a week.
[Nicola:] When do they start him at school?
[Oliver:] Umm he won't be going to school until
[Nicola:] Till next... one. Yeah. [LAUGHTER].
[Oliver:] Yeah I mean he could go, he could go every day all day but umm don't enjoy it so I mean I enjoy it too much. Especially if he's
[Nicola:] I mean... it's an ideal job... you'd be able to fit a round in and do what you want to do.
[Oliver:] Mhm. Yes.
[Nicola:] Now... the payments are, are different. I mean you do get more than forty pee to do a parcel. What we do is we pay Grattan forty pence across the board.
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] There's no specific time for delivery, that's where the bulk of the work is so if we're talking an average round being twenty five parcels a day between Grattan and Next Directory.
[Oliver:] Right.
[Nicola:] Now those Next Directory customers, they pay for a delivery service whereas with like the Grattan and it's free you don't... they pay for delivery and we guarantee that they will get forty eight hour delivery service
[Oliver:] Yeah I've got a Next Directory.
[Nicola:] Oh well you know the system yourself then, don't you?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Now what we'll do is, we can actually get it down to. We'll get it to Kim a day before it's due
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] so on a Tuesday she'll get Next for Wednesday, Wednesday for Thursday etcetera. So it gives her a little bit of leeway. And what we say is as you know yourself you then have an am pm or an early evening call
[Oliver:] Mhm
[Nicola:] umm... an am and a pm during the week cos that's just like the Grattan.
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] If it's an evening then we'll pay you sixty pee to do that. But what we do say is if Kim's got a Wednesday evening and it's only one, she's only got one
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] what we'll say to you is that you got that parcel on Tuesday
[Oliver:] So it's up to you really.
[Nicola:] Why don't you get rid of it and give that customer a twenty four hour delivery service
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] and please yourself.... So as long as the Next directory is done early at all times
[Oliver:] You still get your sixty pee even if you do do it in the day.
[Bill:] During the day.
[Nicola:] Or... if you leave it with a neighbour then we've got a calling card to say thought you might like it early
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Mm, Mm
[Linda:] then, Mm
[Nicola:] then they can't really.
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] Umm... but if the neighbour will take it sign the receipt but that's fine. So again if we do say that the
[Linda:] next directory, Umm...
[Nicola:] you can still... suit yourself.
[Oliver:] Yeah I mean my stuff's always on the last but... I never seen
[Nicola:] No. He comes out and does the Next in the evenings because a lot of it umm... Linda goes and does all her Grattan.
[Oliver:] Yeah three or four children so
[Nicola:] Yeah. Yes.
[Oliver:] I've never seen... her
[Nicola:] She probably, she will come round and do the day. She'll probably do all the Grattan. It's just the way they, they, they found it easier umm
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] he'll probably come out
[Oliver:] Maybe he does shifts maybe he's around
[Linda:] [scream]
[Nicola:] So, what we say is that the more things are eight until twelve. Umm... it's Monday to Friday with Grattan and Next together, we do actually umm deliver on Saturdays for just Next.
[Oliver:] Right.
[Bill:] And for that we'll pay the girls a retainer if you like to deliver from one customer to thirteen customers on that Saturday. If they get one customer they get ten pounds but if they're unlucky enough to get thirteen they get ten pounds [LAUGHTER].
[Oliver:] ten pounds.
[Nicola:] If they get any more than thirteen customers which is highly unlikely unless there's a sale on... then we'll get them... we'll give them twenty five pence per customer on top.
[Oliver:] I see.
[Nicola:] And... if they come to collect and return because we run a return service as well
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] then we pay them forty pee to collect and return to. If they return, if their collecting the Grattan of Next returns all week it's.
[Oliver:] Right.
[Nicola:] The return system, we, we say to the girls they must come back... but they're to be incorporated within the round. So they'll either phone Grattan or phone Next and it will come on what we call manifests, the green sheet you sign
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] is what we call a manifest. And on that it will say an R for return or... whatever and give the girls instructions as to where to go to pick
[Linda:] umm, to pick...
[Oliver:] Yes, yes.
[Nicola:] Yes. It's nice when you can do the two together
[Oliver:] Yes.
[Nicola:] because it's less bother then, you don't have to come back again. So it it it gives, gives, gives the girls a lot of different sort of ways break it up, fit it in and... and I'm making it sound very nice
[Linda:] [shouting]
[Nicola:] but when you first start... it is horrendous, it really is. And... you, you get these parcels what we do is we map our route out. Then we know numbers on the parcels, one twenty the one you get is the one and it's a lot better I know I've seen road somewhere or you know it's a lot easier
[Linda:] []
[Nicola:] Well, like what?
[Oliver:] I dunno. Make me a cup of coffee if you're busy or something or
[Nicola:] No, I'll make the coffee.
[Oliver:] or umm
[Nicola:] I bought us some brackets.
[Oliver:] Oh did you?... Where you, where you said. Jean how much?
[Nicola:] I got them in umm... you know in Penge it was... Payless wasn't it?...
[Oliver:] Where you turn left for Janet's it was on the right.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] Yes, yeah I think so.
[Nicola:] No it's Do It All now.
[Oliver:] Oh.... That's Smith's isn't it, W H Smith's.
[Nicola:] Mhm. Six pounds for five.
[Oliver:] Oh well.
[Nicola:] So.... I think I need some more than that but that's all I had, the six pounds.
[Oliver:] Oh good. Well.
[Nicola:] These aren't bra-, these aren't really, they're... shelf brackets.... That's what they're meant for.
[Oliver:] Oh yes but they-, they're similar to what we've got holding that
[Nicola:] butter
[Oliver:] smaller because of the width of the shelves.
[Nicola:] They're half the price of hanging basket
[Oliver:] Oh.
[Nicola:] hooks.
[Oliver:] Well.
[Nicola:] And that's what I've bought before.
[Oliver:] Yeah, well what's the difference? I mean you don't need the size do you? And the basket's the thing. Oh good.
[Nicola:] I bought two small ones because I think I've got two small baskets.... So...
[Oliver:] Oh good.
[Nicola:] So I've got five. One two three four five. There's one in the garage I'm sure there was one left over in the garage.
[Oliver:] I think you said there was.
[Nicola:] So that's six. What? Oh!
[Oliver:] [LAUGHTER]
[Nicola:] The expensive watch. It looks nice doesn't it?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] I thought mummy was gonna keep it?
[Oliver:] Well, she said let me more than welcome but umm... well... when she came home it was in the... suede pouch and she said well... here y'are, here's you're watch, you know. So I tried it and I thought, well wearing it.
[Nicola:] It looks nice dunnit?
[Oliver:] Mhm.... It's leather so I. Genuine leather.... Smith's move... but made in Hong Kong.
[Nicola:] Is it battery?
[Oliver:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Well it looks nice dunnit?
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] Looks bigger than umm... Cos mummy had it with her when you came down... on Saturday.
[Oliver:] Oh, did she?
[Nicola:] [crockery noise] It looks bigger than umm...
[Oliver:] Bigger than you
[Nicola:] Well when she put it on, didn't look that big.... But
[Oliver:] When did I see it first then? [crockery noise]
[Nicola:] Right.
[Oliver:] I must have been at, well I'm sure it was at home.
[Nicola:] Yeah but I think she wasn't sure what she was gonna do.
[Oliver:] No she said there you are, there's something for you. She op-, give us the umm... after-, aftershave and deodorant which we said were the cheapest. And er oh... eau de toi- whatever. So she said well you know, at least I buy Aramis for Johnny and for you so the two purchases are not... just to get the watch. And she er, I said oh. And umm
[Nicola:] I think she was undecided what she was gonna do. I think may-, you know she thought maybe she might have kept it for an occasion
[Oliver:] Ohh.
[Nicola:] or something.
[Oliver:] Anyway, she umm...
[Nicola:] Pond needs cleaning out again as well.
[Oliver:] Does it? She said to the woman umm... I don't know, like is there any panic or, so she said well we've had quite a, only got five left. Mummy said how long, she said well while the watches last. I've only got five left. But I don't know how many they had.... Not six I wouldn't have thought, or ten you know I dunno but umm
[Nicola:] Never know do you?
[Oliver:] and, what was funny in the ad it didn't say where....
[Nicola:] Oh didn't it?
[Oliver:] No
[Nicola:] maybe it was everywhere then.
[Oliver:] Well yes. So umm anyway.
[Nicola:] Cos normally they'll say like Selfridges or Harrods or
[Oliver:] Well I mean said she got them in Dickens but she said Selfridges would be favourite probably. But umm anyway.
[Nicola:] Maybe they were doing it everywhere.
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Cos sometimes they'll say just House of Fraser stores or
[Oliver:] Yeah, yeah
[Nicola:] Debenhams or something.
[Oliver:] I er
[Nicola:] D'you wanna sandwich?
[Oliver:] Not particularly. D'you?
[Nicola:] No.... I don't fancy one. D'you wanna biscuit or something?
[Oliver:] Umm... yeah I'll have a biscuit please.
[Nicola:] Ohh....
[Oliver:] There's a film for you.
[Nicola:] Oh lovely, thank you.
[Oliver:] neither here nor there but twenty four.
[Nicola:] Oh okay.
[Oliver:] Doesn't matter does it?
[Nicola:] Well, anything's better than nothing.
[Oliver:] Yeah, so that's a twenty four, I mean you can have another... twenty four next. I dunno I just grabbed it and umm
[Nicola:] Ooh.
[Oliver:] You can always get some more I would think. Ah.... Well as he said... well he didn't say but I mean it's just a question of him putting them in the post.... How sensitive is the mike?...
[Nicola:] I'm not sure really.... Picks up the telly....
[Oliver:] D'you wanna look at these?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] What d'you reckon she looks like Joan Simms?
[Nicola:] That's what she... she said
[Oliver:] Current, current Joan Simms that is.
[Nicola:] Yeah, not carry on films Joan Simms.
[Oliver:] No.
[Derek:] That's how crowded it was.
[Nicola:] Uhum!... Deserted innit?
[Derek:] And I don't know why these didn't come out terribly... maybe because it was stormy and cloudy or whatever but, still.... [biscuit munching]
[Nicola:] Mm it is cloudy innit?
[Derek:] Mm.... I think that's where there was a storm brewing....
[Nicola:] Dark aren't they?
[Derek:] Mm.... And that, well... that was so nice and I didn't know quite what that'd go, I just took that, that was the arrangement in the, in the foyer.
[Nicola:] That looks nice dunnit? They're those things that uncurl, aren't they?... These.
[Derek:] Anthurium they are.
[Nicola:] Are they? They sort of uncurl don't they?
[Derek:] Mm. South African thing. That's the thing I didn't know about, and didn't ask anybody....
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] There.... [sigh]. saying what's that, what's that so I took, I walked, I walked down and took a photograph of it.
[Nicola:] Mhm. That looks like a cross between a... orchid and a gladioli. Dunnit?
[Derek:] Mhm.... That's from the verandah.
[Nicola:] Mhm. Lovely innit?
[Derek:] That's the park. And... well... I dunno if I took a... continuity one round to the left. Probably looking down I think, probably. Well that's umm... [crunches biscuit]... Oh that's, is that similar?... Well that's sort of like, yes it's like that, yeah.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] There's the tennis courts and you can see the beginning of, and the beaches round the corner. And this was San Key park.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] And that's the... can you see it there, or is it that one.... Oh yeah... As close as that... that's the dreaded bridge.
[Nicola:] Oh is it.
[Derek:] And you come over the bridge and the toll's this side of it. So it was, an entrance to the park was here and the entrance to the hotel is there
[Nicola:] Oh
[Derek:] so that's how close we were when we had the... blow out thing.
[Nicola:] Thought I had a puncture today. Well not cos I felt like it but I was at the lights in Bromley... this bloke, this, was stand-, sort of kept staring at my front... passenger side wheel.... He sort of walked away, he was staring like this...
[Derek:] Oh.
[Nicola:] But umm... I sort of drove on for a bit and thought it feels alright and then when I got to that, you know B P petrol station, I pulled in and got out and had a look.... I thought maybe I've got a puncture and I can't feel it or something sticking out of it or something but... couldn't see anything. He didn't say anything he was just like, but I mean he was really close. He was like as close as that and he was really staring and he wasn't staring at the road cos as I went on a few feet he stared at the car again. And, but he didn't sort of point and say anything. I don't think we've got anything particularly unusual about our hubcaps or... well if they were really sort of amazing hubcaps then
[Derek:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] but they're not.
[Derek:] Strange.. So nothing er
[Nicola:] Well I had a look and I couldn't see anything. I mean he... for him to see it walking along the road if there was anything. I mean... it's driving alright and I couldn't see anything sticking out of it....
[Derek:] Strange one again, but that's when, when I tried to get the lightning.
[Nicola:] Oh.
[Derek:] That's when it was all happening. And that's a crowded beach.
[Nicola:] [LAUGHTER]... lovely sand isn't it?
[Derek:] Mhm. That's where they set up the umm... these things for these
[Nicola:] Oh yeah
[Derek:] these, these people that use the conference rooms, you know?
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] Cos that was St Petersberg catholic ladies guild or something and another day it was something like I B M or... whatever you know. They run it rather like
[Nicola:] What sort of time was that? Umm, do you reckon?
[Derek:] Middling, late afternoon....
[Nicola:] No-one there at all is there?
[Derek:] No.... That's the. We were sort of waiting for the sunset thing. That's, this was, oh I dunno what time it was, between seven and eight. There's the swimming pool.
[Nicola:] That's pretty innit?... Those palm trees are so funny the way the grow straight up.
[Derek:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Derek:] There's the beach again.
[Nicola:] Hmm.
[Derek:] There's that drinks thing where you sit all round on the high stalls you know
[Nicola:] Oh yeah.
[Derek:] the...
[Nicola:] Nice innit?
[Derek:] Umm... this was sort of in... clear water, getting in more to clear water. Tried to get it all in. That was a s-, I dunno what it was, some... permanent... waterfall come mini golf thing. It was a sort of... what you call public council grounds I suppose you know.
[Nicola:] Mmm. Nice innit.
[Derek:] Mmm.... That's, well just across the... sunset.
[Nicola:] Oh that's lovely.
[Derek:] There's another one of the, well this was, that was cloudy.
[Nicola:] Where is that? From your room?
[Derek:] Umm... no... no, sort of, I think it was, wait a minute.... no, I dunno where that, I can't remember.... Could have been on that boardwalk thing that we spoke about just across the road.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Derek:] No it couldn't be cos that's the gulf where the sun goes down.... Oh yes that's... right, yeah. Don't remember offhand. There's the cabana things on the beach.
[Nicola:] Hm.
[Derek:] Mummy had this thing about these, I don't know what you'd call them, pelicans I'd... no, not pelicans, what do they call them?... Flamingoes! But not pink. I managed to get one in flight. They weren't, one or two seemed to hang around that thing where they used to throw out food to them.
[Nicola:] What, in the hotel?
[Derek:] In the grounds, yeah. Oh yeah used to walk around.
[Nicola:] Ugh. God!
[Derek:] What?
[Nicola:] Oh they'd freak me out they would.
[Derek:] Really?... Umm
[Nicola:] They're big, aren't they?
[Derek:] We-ell.
[Nicola:] Yeah well they're not like pigeons are they?
[Derek:] Skinny,... weigh about a pound and an half I would think that's all.
[Nicola:] Yeah but they're about three foot tall or something. Ugh
[Derek:] Oh yes.
[Nicola:] God!
[Derek:] Er... Paul again.... Cabanas.
[Nicola:] So what are they, white... flamingoes?
[Derek:] Yeah white and very, very skinny.
[Nicola:] They are flamingoes, not herons or something?
[Derek:] Well, I don't know. I just don't know what they are. But we didn't see any pink flamingoes. They're not as big as the, don't know what they are, could be herons as you say.... These other things are just like pterodactyls. The umm... with the big bill you know. That scoop the fish out. What
[Nicola:] Pelicans.
[Derek:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] They keep them all under there.
[Derek:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] The one's that are in St James's Park.
[Derek:] Oh, that was from the bus.... Yeah, we were back here. This way. And this is on the bus going in to Clearwater on the free... trolley as they call it.
[Nicola:] Oh I know.
[Derek:] That was, I got it on the coach quite a nice thing
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] over the bridge and into Clearwater proper. Er... there's one of the things in full swing.
[Nicola:] [yawning] Oh yeah [].
[Derek:] Now we drove up the road and looked at some of these, they're condominiums and a sort of... chalet type places. I stopped and mummy said, cor that'll be lovely, should take one of that. And they're they are. There's a public access down to the beach... and I just turned round and took it and there's these places that you rent you know?
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] With the, there's the beach as you can see I mean it's...
[Nicola:] It's lovely innit?
[Derek:] right there you know.
[Nicola:] That'd be nice if we all went together a lot with Oliver wouldn't it?
[Derek:] Oh yeah... yeah wonderful.
[Nicola:] No-one's got to go very far to take him down to the beach.
[Derek:] And we had a little... drive... to er... what was it called... Fast Eddy's.... Supposed to be quite well known. And it was a place where one of these boats went... well one of those ones from the lunch, lunch on board you know.
[Nicola:] Oh that's nice.
[Derek:] And there's the one before it left. And we were there when it left. And there's a walk.... A walk along with all the expensive yachts and all that round there you know you sort of approach it and walk along up here and...
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] get the, this was sort of part just along here
[Nicola:] there's paddle steamers along there.
[Derek:] Yeah, yeah.... And that's one the other way.
[Nicola:] You have to have lunch if you go on them? You can't just go on a trip or something?
[Derek:] No, no. It's a, I dunno how much it was
[Nicola:] A lunch and
[Derek:] leave about one o'clock every day. About two hours. And you can see it. It goes back, well not far. And it comes back up to like where we were.
[Nicola:] Oh.
[Derek:] You could actually see it. We saw it one day you know. Turns round and goes back again. That's one from the other direction. And there's also some shots in there.... But whether they've been opened or closed it's like a white elephant, I mean lovely place, look.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] But it was only about... two shops that showed any signs of life. And they weren't open. I mean shops had stuff in them. There was an icecream place. And there was another one with some, I dunno, gifts and souvenir but they were, they, and all the others were empty. I mean there was nobody there at all.
[Nicola:] So you don't know whether it had just been built and
[Derek:] Well it was newish but er... I mean one of the couriers mentioned it to us and I said well I dunno whether you want to pass the information on, whether you know, maybe you don't. I said but if you intend sending people there I shouldn't bother
[Nicola:] Nothing there!
[Derek:] because there's nothing to go for.... The shops are not open. The two that were... said like, nine thirty to something which was like one o'clock, and it didn't say lunch like you couldn't get any. The only place that was open was this Fast Eddy's... for lunch and whatever you know, drinks.
[Nicola:] Lovely place.
[Derek:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] It's like over here though, that umm Surrey Keynes where Bill and I went
[Derek:] Is it. No good? And we drove down to another place, I think this was, it was just called the pub. And we had a meal in there. And sat outside, there again wherever you look I mean... what you pay god knows how much here for for views, you know.
[Nicola:] Mmm.
[Derek:] Just sit there and look out, that's what you look onto.
[Nicola:] Lovely innit.
[Derek:] That's that lot.
[Nicola:] Mm. They've come out nice haven't they?
[Derek:] Mm. And this lot is some that I took down here. No that was the room.
[Nicola:] That's nice.... That's nice innit?
[Derek:] That was the front door. That's the adjoining one that mummy
[Nicola:] Oh yeah.
[Derek:] Two double beds and the sliding doors and verandah was this way of course.
[Nicola:] Mm. Nice lot of space.
[Derek:] Oh yes.
[Nicola:] Like drawers and cupboards and things.
[Derek:] And the Oh yeah. And behind here, up there, was a big big deep shelf which took the suitcases comfortably.
[Nicola:] Oh that's a good idea.
[Derek:] Underneath that, at waist level, was another shelf built into a recess. Where we put all our... the kettle.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Derek:] The, the ice buckets and all that, you know. Opposite that was the hand basin and round in behind the mirrors here was the bathroom.
[Nicola:] Mhm.... Nice innit?
[Derek:] Mm.... That was the er... tells you what channels you can get what you pay for
[Nicola:] Oh yeah.
[Derek:] and what you don't. I don't think we used all these. There was, there was two more, two more
[Nicola:] No. Loads of space.
[Derek:] along there. And these, just, you just the handle, and the door is two... I think... both doors had three, full length mirrors. And they just concertina open.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Derek:] And they, well, terrific size.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] That was taken for a joke on the place that, god knows what it was, what it was. I just said, I just said stop.
[Nicola:] Uhuh.
[Derek:] Stop for a minute you know.
[Nicola:] Uhum....
[Derek:] Mummy's birthday flowers.
[Nicola:] Oh they look nice, don't they?...
[Derek:] That's outside the front....
[Nicola:] Nice trees. In boxes with a bench.
[Derek:] On the boardwalk....
[Nicola:] Hm.
[Derek:] On the boardwalk.
[Nicola:] With Oliver's Disney carrier bag!
[Derek:] Yes. That's wh-, must have been virtually the last day when we discovered the Disney shop across the road.... And of course it's so umm... as I say it's so crowded you know, look.
[Nicola:] Uhuh!... You wouldn't believe it, would you? Still I, it's out of season innit?... Wonder what it's like in... November.
[Derek:] Well Derek said, was it November or December through January and February, that's the, it's like seventy. He said that's, it's beautiful then you know.
[Nicola:] Mm. What about the amount of people, does it really get crowded.
[Derek:] Well, I, I, I dunno. I can't remember whether he said... yes or no.
[Nicola:] Hm.
[Derek:] We walked there, it was quite a walk down to the water and you can see the depth of the
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] Well from the hotel, we walked down... and just happened to take, and where, where this chap that we met at... that had this hotel in Eastbourne. Either one or the other was a place where he went and looked and he, he was going back in October.
[Nicola:] Oh.
[Derek:] The, the um, you know, condominium things.
[Nicola:] Mm.... Lovely sand though innit?
[Derek:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Oh there's those bikes that go in the water!
[Derek:] Yeah.
[Nicola:] Uhum. They look really good fun, cos they're like pedalos but sort of different aren't they?
[Derek:] Yes they're back wheel drive and don't they with the
[Nicola:] Did they have any of those umm... scooters.
[Derek:] Saw some yeah, I dunno where from. Not, not, not immediate you know but sort of, they do go don't they?
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Derek:] There's another one of the... things going on.
[Nicola:] Oh looks nice dunnit? And barbie on the beach.
[Derek:] Mhm. That's the grass area, the pool was there. And we tended to come to this area, grass and there's that... bar thing again
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Derek:] the beach is down there, you can see the... things sticking up you
[Nicola:] The sky looks nice that day.
[Derek:] Oh yes. I mean it was, like that virtually every day.... And I think... now these are some I took for your...
[Nicola:] Uhum. Mm. Looks nice dunnit?
[Derek:] Mhm.
[Nicola:] Looks a lot bigger in the photos, the garden.... Mm it looks pretty dunnit, the garden?
[Derek:] Certainly does.
[Nicola:] That looks nice. Hmhm. They come out well haven't they?
[Oliver:] Mhm. So er... if you want to take all concerning you out I mean you know.
[Nicola:] I don't mind. It's up to you.
[Oliver:] Well.... We could always see them again and
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] we, we don't really need them at home, do we?
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] They're more for you to er
[Nicola:] Yeah. Okay. Thank you. They've come out well, haven't they. The holiday ones.
[Oliver:] Mhm. And we've got the negatives. I mean, if....
[Nicola:] A lot of that stuff we've got out the back on the bank is umm honesty.
[Oliver:] Which?
[Nicola:] Up there on that bank. This, you know... honesty
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] That's what's growing up there. Load of it. Some of the flowers, those wild flowers have become honesty.
[Oliver:] Really?
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Oh, well I didn't recognize it, not the honesty that I know.
[Nicola:] Yeah it is.
[Oliver:] Is it?
[Nicola:] Cos it's green now.
[Oliver:] Oh.
[Nicola:] Then I suppose it just becomes that transparenty, whitey stuff.
[Oliver:] Oh.
[Nicola:] There's some at the front as well. Some of those, you know the pinky and whitey flowers?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] Have become honesty. Drill, extension, steps [bang] brackets and a pen or pencil. Now providing I've got all that I can be doing some while you you've gone.
[Oliver:] Yeah well I'll be gone... sort of half an hour.
[Nicola:] Mm. [banging]... So you're going in half an hour.
[Oliver:] Yeah, then I'll be gone for half an hour.
[Nicola:] Alright then half an hour to get.... I was wondering is it worth me changing?
[Oliver:] It's up to you. You going out tonight?
[Nicola:] No.... Umm... Mummy's, mummy ph-, oh and she's coming up with Brian.
[Oliver:] Oh is she.
[Nicola:] At five thirty.
[Oliver:] So what are you gonna do? Leave here about five then?
[Nicola:] Well... fifteen... yeah, something like that. Get home. It doesn't matter if I'm not there but umm... you know with the time she's there and whatever. Which one shall we use? Ashtray?
[Oliver:] Well there's one being used already.... Somewhere....
[Nicola:] Here you are.
[Oliver:] Thankyou....
[Nicola:] And mummy also mentioned something about. Cos Brian told her that... they were doing a census... Sydenham. And if I wanted, you know go another way or something. And I thought well how long does it take. And it was just down by Lauries Park you know. I always come, always turn right from home. And then come down Crystal Palace Park Road
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] down, along all... Anyway, it was on the bend, and he just waved me they were still there lunchtime
[Oliver:] Mhm
[Nicola:] or what I dunno. He just waved me through.
[Oliver:] So you haven't sussed the Newlands Park umm... way yet then?...
[Nicola:] Umm... Not properly, no. I did. Now what did I do when, one day last week.... Oh, I was going to Beckenham.... But I didn't come out where you said. But I did something that I m-, should have done before, coming from umm Volkspares
[Oliver:] That's where you need to go.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] Down Volkspares Road. And when you get sort of to... [sigh] you have to go round and then you go like ro-, there's a big bend isn't there
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] like there's some council flats and you go down. And then you turn right where there's that big... well it's sort of obvious where you turn right. Umm... It's Leonard Road and then you turn right into umm [tut] forget the name of the road now.... But as you go round that bend, there's a turning, as you go round the bend and you go down. And I think it's signposted Penge or something and you turn right there. And you carry on straight all the way down there and just carry on straight, and then you come to umm a road that Kent House Road goes that way... Kent House Lane or Kent House Road. But you need to go sort of you, you have to sort of go over and like that and you go down Kings Hall Road.
[Nicola:] Yeah I think that's what I do. And where d'you come out?
[Oliver:] You go all the way down Kings Hall Road. And then you tu- you go all the way down all the way down, and then you turn right at Bridge Street.... You go over the bridge... and then you turn... and then if you're coming here, you go... turn right again into umm [snaps fingers]... [sigh] d'you know I can never remember the name of the road, another road anyway you turn right. And then you come out into Rectory Road.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Just by umm... the station.
[Nicola:] Oh well I didn't do that. I saw Kent House and I thought. Now I can't remember, if I go one way I'm gonna finish back up in
[Oliver:] If you go to Kent House you just come straight back out into Beckenham.
[Nicola:] Kent or something I'll take a chance and I'll go this way and I went, and I came out... there's a garage on the way to Beckenham.
[Oliver:] Yeah. Well you see you need to go
[Nicola:] On the main road. Thought well at least I'm heading in the right direction you know.
[Oliver:] But you need to go the one over. You need to go over. Where the road is, you sh-, you should sort of come out like that and the main road sort of goes round like that and you need to sort of go like that. You, you want to go... straight across but it isn't straight across it's sort of like that
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] but it's umm Kings Hall Road.
[Nicola:] Oh I'll, I'll have a look on the map.
[Oliver:] And you sh-, I mean it takes from here to your place, going that way can take fifteen minutes. I mean to get to Beckenham that way it takes. As long as Bromley's alright it can take sort of eight minutes.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] But then going the direct way to get to Beckenham, it's only Bromley... that holds you up. I don't know if umm... Jeff or, would know anybody or can do anything with this. The back is sort of all... floppy....
[Nicola:] The drill... the extension... and the steps.
[Oliver:] Right.
[Nicola:] Umm... Jazz F M phoned me this morning.
[Oliver:] Oh did they?
[Nicola:] Well I phoned them and said, I thought I'd leave it till this morning. And I said er so and so. Ohh I do remember. I said well I don't expect you to. Yes she said, the winner. I said well... apparently yes.
[Oliver:] The loser.
[Nicola:] Doesn't seem to be. So she said umm... I said well I haven't heard from anybody you know. I've heard bits and pieces... that someone overheard a conversation with your Malcolm Laycock but I haven't heard anything since. So she said oh I'll get Tim to ring you. Are you going out. I said yeah, one-ish. Anyway within about half an hour he came on and umm, been on to the record company sorting out a couple of records that we hope are the things you like, plus... they were going to sort you out some tickets weren't they? I said well it was mentioned. So he said well it's all, it's all in hand he said and you know so.
[Oliver:] Tickets for what?
[Nicola:] Some, I dunno.... That I don't know. These are a bit big I think. Oh I mi-, I could possibly... might be better if Jeff... I think that all these, no these are too big. Cos I didn't reckon on umm... I think
[Oliver:] [yawn] I think what it is is that, that thing there, that... I think this, and see that middle bit.
[Nicola:] Yeah, that needs to be bent down. To make it more
[Oliver:] Like a spring.
[Nicola:] Yeah. So that it works as a spring at the moment, just... No you need something finer than this....
[Oliver:] Bill used his umm trimmer edger.
[Nicola:] Oh yeah.
[Oliver:] Yeah, it's marvelous.
[Nicola:] Is it?
[Oliver:] Mhm....
[Nicola:] No, it needs something to go in there, very fine and that to be bent down.
[Oliver:] What d'you want?
[Nicola:] I haven't got anything suitable. I'm just looking at those to see if there's any weight on them it doesn't give any weight on those bags.
[Oliver:] Doesn't it?
[Nicola:] They used to be in... that size I, I can't remember now, that size used to be... I can't remember, no. I mean half a crown size. Can't see any umm.... More than a kilo innit? More than two pounds.
[Oliver:] Mhm.... I dunno.
[Nicola:] It's gotta be dirt cheap, what, what.
[Oliver:] Can't remember now.
[Nicola:] Three fifty was it? Four pounds or something like that I dunno. Right. Are we in the right area?
[Oliver:] Yeah, umm... cos I bought these little ones cos I've got two little baskets. Umm... wonder if a little one would be better here so it won't get knocked so much.
[Nicola:] Mhm.
[Oliver:] D'you reckon?
[Nicola:] Yeah, you don't want it too low do you because umm...
[Oliver:] Oliver can't reach it there.
[Nicola:] No.
[Oliver:] And... if you're coming round the corner you're not gonna knock that are you? You've got
[Nicola:] No, no
[Oliver:] plenty of room whereas if you put a big one there.
[Nicola:] Yeah well you have a look and, yeah well I mean.
[Oliver:] Yeah, cos anything bigger is gonna get knocked, isn't it?
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] Yeah. So put a little one there. Right.
[Nicola:] Right, that one goes there.... [banging]
[Oliver:] Umm... I think a big one here, cos I want to look at it from in there.
[Nicola:] Mm.
[Oliver:] Umm, the kids come round here to get all their toys so... there's a big sort of ridge there so it can't really go over that...
[Nicola:] Oh yeah cos er the screws will hold it, I mean don't worry about that.
[Oliver:] Well, just somewhere sort of, I mean it doesn't really matter. Somewhere... it's gonna be seen so... and the higher the better because all the kids... oh there's the phone.... I'll go and get the phone.
[Nicola:] Er can, [sigh]... can you drill into this concrete?
[Oliver:] Well it looks as though there's a... a masonry drill there, yeah I would think so.
[Nicola:] Cos you can't really put one on the fence. Cos it's too thin, innit?
[Oliver:] Mm.
[Nicola:] And there's no way of
[Oliver:] You can't.
[Nicola:] fixing it onto there, unless you've got like a
[Oliver:] Unless unless you bent it or something.
[Nicola:] So maybe umm... one over there like that somewhere.... Well it doesn't really matter where, if I just tell you where, it doesn't matter where on there. I mean the higher the better.
[Oliver:] Yeah.... It's a shame we can't er... we can't bend them.
[Nicola:] I mean that [blows through lips]
[Oliver:] gonna be alright?
[Nicola:] It's not gonna be in anybody's way.
[Oliver:] No.
[Nicola:] I mean the barbecue's here...
[Oliver:] Can't... no.
[Nicola:] Cos you can't screw into this fencing. It's too thin....
[Oliver:] Well... I'll have a go at drilling up there as high as poss.
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] level with the top.
[Nicola:] Yeah, and then, that'll be like that.
[Oliver:] Mm.... Yeah?
[Nicola:] Yeah, because that, it's not gonna catch fire cos the barbecue's here. And that's just a shelf, so when you've got the stuff coming out. Yeah.
[Oliver:] well you can always take it down anyway.
[Nicola:] So one there.
[Oliver:] So that's going up there. Up there. As high as possible.
[Nicola:] Umm. That one there, that one there. Umm got another little one. Umm, oh that's where I want one, here.... Well, one right over there or there. Umm....
[Oliver:] It can always be changed but I mean you've got the, got the lamp this side, and the barbecue.
[Nicola:] So if I put the lamp basket here.
[Oliver:] Well bit more, it'll be too much one side
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Oliver:] but that's up to you entirely....
[Nicola:] Maybe a big one there.... Sort of there I suppose is it?
[Oliver:] Well, it's in that line of con, just below that line of concrete and the top of the door.
[Nicola:] Yeah well, yeah
[Oliver:] Which is that way isn't it?
[Nicola:] Okay then.
[Oliver:] So... Is that it?
[Nicola:] Yup. Right, come and have your drink.... there's a cup of
[Oliver:] concrete in one.
[Nicola:] That's good. Umm don't do that darling to the flowers.
[Bill:] get the bumblebee.
[Nicola:] Well the bumblebee doesn't want to be got.
[Bill:] I'm trying to trap a bumblebee.
[Nicola:] You're trying to trap him?
[Bill:] Yes.
[Nicola:] I don't think he wants to be trapped. down.
[Oliver:] Yeah, why don't you just sit down and have our drink first. And Del's gonna have his tea.
[Bill:] That's worked out good. There y'are. [drilling noise] Mm. That was very hieroglyphic wasn't it?
[Oliver:] Yeah I think we'd better come away from that, thank you.
[Bill:] I'm going to one match. No I'm not.
[Nicola:] .
[Bill:] What have I done. One,
[Nicola:] No.
[Bill:] Two. Three. Four. Where are we going after tea?
[Oliver:] There's one there.
[Bill:] Oh thank you very much. Thank you.... Is this mine? Oh I'm sorry. I thought it was mine. I am sorry. I am.... let's get that bumblebee [drilling noise]. Right and have a drink and we're gonna, I'll do this in a minute. Where am I going?
[Oliver:] Two.
[Bill:] Oh yes, I can see the mark. Right it's tea first.... do that properly. What's the time, four. Good god is it already. Thank you very much.
[Nicola:] Come out of there.
[Bill:] Well I got lots of jobs to do.
[Oliver:] That fern is umm still alive.
[Bill:] Oh is it?
[Nicola:] Where's that bumblebee?
[Oliver:] That bumblebee, there he is on the end there, look.
[Nicola:] Where.
[Oliver:] Don't hurt him.
[Nicola:] I'm going to trap him.
[Bill:] He doesn't want to be trapped.
[Oliver:] No, no.
[Nicola:] Why?
[Oliver:] Cos they're very good. They do, I mean... they only, they only sting you if you, if you try and capture them.
[Bill:] If you trap them then they'll sting you.
[Oliver:] If you trap them they get annoyed then they'll sting you. But if you just leave them alone, he's doing.
[Bill:] He's just having some dinner.
[Oliver:] He's having some dinner in the, they eat, they eat the... thing in the flowers it's all like sweet sauce.
[Bill:] You don't really need to trap anything.
[Nicola:] I do trap.
[Oliver:] Which is mine? This one?
[Bill:] No, the other one.
[Oliver:] The other one. That one, no.... That mine? Is that my Shreddies there?
[Nicola:] . Alright I'm not gonna trap that bumblebee.
[Oliver:] There's a good boy. No don't do that.... Mm?
[Nicola:] Indians.
[Bill:] No thank you.
[Oliver:] Indians.
[Bill:] [sigh]
[Oliver:] .
[Nicola:] got this thing. They got a spear. You can
[Oliver:] Where's my special walking stick, I can't go out in the jungle without walking stick... cos I might slip over.
[Nicola:] I brought it for you.
[Oliver:] Oh that's lovely. Thank you very much.
[Nicola:] There's. That's my walking stick, I walking stick, I want to.
[Oliver:] You slipped over a few times but you got up alright didn't you? You fell down and slid a little way, didn't you?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Oliver:] On your bottom, you slid down on, cos it was all, bit slimy wasn't it?
[Nicola:] Yes. Are we coming down Saturday?
[Oliver:] Yes, please....
[Bill:] You got to take your sword.
[Oliver:] Is Nana and Del looking after you on Saturday?
[Nicola:] We're coming down to look after you on Saturday.... Will that be Okay?
[Bill:] Yes.
[Nicola:] Good. And if it's, if it's light. If it's still light and we can see what, I dunno what's happening on Saturday.
[Oliver:] We'd like to go out reasonably early if we could.
[Nicola:] But we can have a little game, can't we, outside? Before you go to bed. Pardon?
[Bill:] bed.
[Nicola:] Mm. We'll have a game before you go to bed.
[Oliver:] He's been a good boy. You've been going to bed nice and early haven't you?
[Nicola:] That's very good for you.
[Oliver:] Ooh.
[Nicola:] I watched that umm... whatever it was called, Japanese mafia thing last night.
[Oliver:] Oh, Robert Mitchum.
[Nicola:] I'd seen it before but... couldn't remember it you know.
[Oliver:] We didn't bother.
[Bill:] my walking stick. I've got my walking stick.
[Oliver:] Then there was er. Have you? There's a was in a thing. Later, I think it was on Anglia, was it?... The Connection, or was that on I T V? Don't know, we went to bed.
[Bill:] So I recorded that.
[Nicola:] this one. I can this one.
[Bill:] Can you?
[Nicola:] Yes.
[Bill:] One hand too. Very good.
[Nicola:] But I don't that one..
[Bill:] Oh, that is a pity, isn't it?
[Nicola:] Right, let me move into position.... See what we can do here. Now then.... That's done enough.
[Oliver:] I'm gonna with you. I'm gonna with you.. What are you gonna do that? I want put it on there.
[Nicola:] That's that. Now then, we're moving over here.
[Oliver:] Are you gonna play soldiers with me or not?
[Nicola:] all this drilling. See how we go for time.
[Bill:] Look at this, Oliver.... Look. We've gotta clean the pond out. Oh, maybe Del will help you do that. Look....
[Oliver:] What's that? What's that.
[Bill:] Pick it up. Let's show Del.
[Oliver:] It's
[Bill:] It's a snail.
[Nicola:] Don't hurt them.
[Oliver:] I'm trying to
[Nicola:] Don't hurt them.
[Oliver:] I don't like them.
[Nicola:] Well don't touch them then, they're not touching you, so don't touch them.
[Oliver:] I wanna make them dead.
[Nicola:] No, don't be so nasty.
[Oliver:] I am.
[Nicola:] Look what he's done? He's crushed a snail.
[Bill:] Crushed a snail?
[Nicola:] Yeah.
[Bill:] Aah.
[Nicola:] You're naughty aren't you? How would you like it if someone stamped on your head?
[Oliver:] I'm going
[Nicola:] You're just being nasty, that's what you're doing. Ow!
[Oliver:] What've you done?
[Nicola:] He trapped me.
[Bill:] Can you er, in a minute
[Oliver:] Mhm.
[Bill:] I think I'll have to have some of those rawplugs cos I'm running out of matches.
[Oliver:] Right.
[Nicola:] I'm gonna get my sword.
[Oliver:] No, I don't want you touching those snails. Cos they're not doing any harm to anybody at all.
[Nicola:] Look what you're doing to it!
[Oliver:] you haven't got matches have you? Ordinary wooden matches.
[Nicola:] Get off!
[Bill:] I don't want to. I'm
[Nicola:] If you want to jump on something you jump on the trampoline.
[Bill:] I want to sit mummy.
[Nicola:] Well you sit on it but you don't jump on it.
[Oliver:] shoes on.
[Bill:] four o'clock.
[Nicola:] Well take your shoes off then. Come on, sit down on the step. There you are.
[Oliver:] Oh that's lovely.
[Nicola:] Now, it's there isn't it?
[Oliver:] Just that one on that post.... They'll look nice won't they, once they're all filled up?
[Nicola:] Mhm.... Where did I... Did I have it?
[Oliver:] What?
[Nicola:] The bracket for this one?
[Oliver:] Yeah, I left them all out..... There it is.
[Nicola:] Where? Oh, maybe I fell down. So it's a... right that's there bits and bits.