[Mark:] I hope you realised they said a few a words on there that's... just been picked up like... while I was
[speaker002:] Yeah I know.
[Mark:] on the phone.
[speaker002:] ... I hope you're aware that....
[Mark:] [cough]
[Josephine:] They said record... everything.... Otherwise we will come and see how bad it is.... I shall be.... Is forty three okay?....
[speaker002:] Well what's Mark doing?... That's that's fine. Mark had.
[Josephine:] Mark... will he be first to finish? He can go and he'll be third.
[Mark:] You're telling me you have that round the house playing, on record all the time?
[speaker002:] So you can't
[Josephine:] That's right.
[Mark:] Ah?
[speaker002:] You can't. Well you wouldn't.
[Mark:] Will it be so unusual,?
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER] be good.... These are corpus records.... For the er....
[Mark:] Stick it in your bedroom. What, does it pick up the farting?
[speaker002:] What?
[Mark:] Stick it in your bedroom.
[speaker002:] Won't get nothing there.
[Mark:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] You'd have laughed.... Catherine's house the bed shop.... There was a man in the window and he jumped on the bed!... And he laid there!... And he must have been nearly ten minutes! So we sat and watched him. And he got up and he got on another bed!... And he laid there!... And he went round all the beds!... And then he bought head board!... [LAUGHTER]
[Mark:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] Ah? Unless he'd just bought a bed. Our dad's been away. She won't go out! Why?
[Mark:] She doesn't.
[speaker002:] From the... dinner time to tea time. No.... What's the matter with her? Well at least she's, he hadn't been doing enough work somehow!... Cos he come I have. back home! I've been... I've been to the...... Saturdays and Wednesdays Saturdays and Wednesdays, Saturday and Wednesday. No exception... Keep it up! Yeah, but whe, on the Tuesday and the Friday. But not on ... No? I do sometimes have a lay down... but in my school she says right, can you go and..., I go like that.
[Mark:] Must have.... Oh shit!
[speaker002:] Mm?
[Mark:] Supposed to be up Sally's for tea!... Shit!
[speaker002:] That's what I said! It's Thursday!
[Mark:] Oh Shit!...
[speaker002:] That's a new word for the dictionary, that! Paid up the insurance for the car, yeah?
[Mark:] No.
[speaker002:] That'll cost you a fiver!
[Mark:] .... It said nothing of the!
[speaker002:] We'd asked you
[Mark:] ....
[speaker002:] It was definitely he was getting the parts. Alright.
[Mark:] Yeah but that was
[speaker002:] Didn't he say?
[Mark:] two months ago!
[speaker002:] Six months.
[Mark:] That was too bad... cos... I said to this bloke.
[speaker002:] Then you can pay my car can't you?
[Mark:] Yeah I can.
[speaker002:] It'll be two years. I said, well.
[Mark:] Well Buddy, got the assessor back down there, as you know.....
[speaker002:] Did they charge you for the?
[Mark:] So he's... at least we'll go round all the... the.... It's only a small piece of carpet.
[speaker002:] Does, does the manufacturer, does the production and they can't make the part and we need part B... for it.... Cos the stock. Dad?..., see that over there?... That right? In between the.... And don't let guff right! Don't...! So it should been in it! They wouldn't have guessed, they could say we'll be out Friday night!...... I don't need it Friday night and leave it in the that. Stop it! it'll be... Don't!... Cos it'll be ... If they open that new garage then we will.... Are they gonna? Won't be open. Dad?
[Mark:] [cough]
[speaker002:] This, is costing me!
[Mark:] Pat's not with them.
[speaker002:] Perhaps they'll be writing if off? in again
[Mark:] Well no, he's gonna give us your car back. As soon as the bloke
[speaker002:] Do the same thing.
[Mark:] agrees.
[speaker002:] So.
[Mark:] So.
[speaker002:] [sigh] Ha []! What's to be done? At where?
[Mark:] ...
[speaker002:] Well, I'm afraid it could be there for six months!... Because the manufacturer the part... Ford.... Are not making... at the moment... the part, the problem with the manufacturer.... The manufacturer...... said she was having the problem there.
[Mark:] It's only a small body kind of thing.... what're they gonna have to order?
[speaker002:] Behind.
[Mark:] She said, the part they were gonna have to put on it
[speaker002:] To fix it!
[Mark:] was about a hundred and eighty quid!... And then they were gonna have cut most of that off... to replace
[speaker002:] to
[Mark:] cut a piece off.
[speaker002:] Well where do you think it comes from?
[Mark:] Dunno,....
[speaker002:] ......
[Mark:] Do you know the woman at the end of our road, right? Takes me to... school everyday.... She's got a D reg Sierra... with a, a locking petrol cap... something went wrong with this other one.... They couldn't get her a new one!... Ford. They could not get her a new one! She had to have it modified!
[speaker002:] I know, they've got to get it made!
[Mark:] Repaired.
[speaker002:] clutch
[Mark:] That's a D reg, nineteen eighty seven car!... But Ford could not get one in the new cap!...!... Incredible!
[speaker002:] ... there's a problem on construction line, to have it made and it won't done, cos there's a problem with it!... So that the....
[Mark:] You could send out to Japan quicker, for that part!... Been waiting for this, this is supposed to be... in the U K and you just can't get the part!
[speaker002:] Right, I'm going to the work, I'll see you later!
[Mark:] Bye!... Bye!
[speaker002:] He couldn't have the part!...
[Mark:] Are you coming off or what?
[speaker002:] He says one thing... not only do we Well I wonder where he gets that from? So there's me Can't.
[Mark:] No.
[speaker002:] Plus we got the trouble with the!... You can't blame.
[Mark:] I think it's gotta be through there.... You see, it's the same with, he didn't want the car to go into Green's.... And then they They say you've gotta put the car into Greens and that's!
[speaker002:] They recommend it anyway
[Mark:] Now that I've never ever come across that before!... They've, they've never in fact... that means they normally or something like this on a car.... They just....
[speaker002:] Perhaps they'll
[Mark:] I'll go down and show them... tomorrow.... Had the car... sometime, if I'm not there,. They'll take it.
[speaker002:] ... you would!
[Mark:] a time.
[speaker002:] ... on the bus............ fifteen pound eight plus vat... when they say five pound eight plus vat, plus insurance that's cheaper.... well you don't qualify for it.... So she goes I'll found out but I'm sure you don't qualify it.... And even if you did you couldn't get.... Yes, you qualify for it!..., you do qualify for it.... Under the....... and....
[Mark:] Oh.
[speaker002:] And I said to.
[Mark:] Yeah.... it happened to us... after forty eight hours!... But we got it.... We'd have had a car....
[speaker002:] Got this... got this quote, right, from... the other garage ... what just..., how much did you say? Seven... seven figure! Cheap... right!... They were gonna spray the whole car, which Green's won't do!... Green's would wanna charge another six hundred pound to spray half a car Six fifty seven quid. Right? Green's is a right rip off! Now... we, we've said that.... This other garage can throw in a courtesy car as well! And they've... it's gotta go into Green's because we've... we've paid our policy! Paid our insurance! Speedy and efficient. Yeah. I said, well I have seen speed at the moment, but I haven't seen any efficiency! Yeah, they've got to contact us now. And I'd like to see quality! Well I wouldn't buy a wheelbarrow at Green's No!
[Mark:] [cough]
[speaker002:] he's going to catch a cold! But the attitude.... I rang up Monday and I said to her You know, what's happening about What's happening about the car? When could the car be done? No, when... when No, I rang up to say... the car should be out on Monday should I like to say Wednesday, no problem.... No....... I said... problem?... No problem!... No, he told you that he definitely get it, eleven o'clock! He said, he said at I says
[Josephine:] Is he? Why?
[Danny:] He's taught me....
[Josephine:] all mine I suppose.... She and erm... the children.... And he dreams about a.
[Danny:] Won't have the.....
[Josephine:] You'll be coming round nan's then will you?... She'll have to go to town near Dudley.
[Danny:] ...
[speaker002:] That's.
[Tina:] He's supposed to go to er....... Gotta go to... what's it called again?
[Danny:] Oh look!... They've run over to the sheep!... Didn't know... pretending.... He's supposed to be or something.... Supposed to have let me know last night... again.... I don't know what's up.
[Tina:] You'll have to ring him up!... You did go in di, didn't you?... Go in.... From work I'll have to ring here... and we'll have to go and get him.... to er... just gotta go. He doesn't know what day.
[Josephine:] Well the forecast says... it's gonna be rough!... In the north of Wales that's in snow and blizzards all day!... They said that... or two.... And what about Tuesday?... Then we got... you know, next Tuesday.... Stroll on!... How's your fingers?
[Tina:] Sore, better, but a bit sore.
[Josephine:] It will be for a bit love.... How do you cut your fingers in your cupboard?
[Tina:] Dunno.... Cos they weren't near the glasses.... They were in the.
[Josephine:] .
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Always does
[Tina:] Yeah I will. Yeah.... See... see that.
[Josephine:] Not the finger.
[Tina:] Give me the.... It, it, they're always....
[Josephine:] Ooh dear!
[Tina:] ....
[Josephine:] But when we got married... but when we started to...... we went to we did our shopping in there.... There was a... a nice furniture shop... in... and there was a nice... hardware stores.... Didn't belong to the same people... But they did an awful lot of... trade.... You know, market days and.... And we got our furniture... furniture in this place and there's a story in this one.... So we to the hardware shop and we bought some mats and... dishes and... God knows what!... And we bought a...... Then a, don't seem to have heard of in a kitchen.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And... we bought this extra... and then went better side of the bed.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And... as time went on... course... I'd got no experience of house... cleaning boots... and managing, or anything like that!... Cos we had this mat there a long time... and I think we picked.... But it was a beauty!... Pretty one, you know, a nice one.... And... I didn't know what to do with the thing!.... I didn't know what to do with it dad!... No experience... of ever anybody doing it.... Can't... think to ask.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] So it's up in my bedroom... during the summer... scrubbing....
[Tina:] That's right, and windy!
[Josephine:] So I put it up... and I gave to... like that, I went put them in the water! Like this!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] But the, it was hot!... And to dry that one... and, and that came up like... pretty.... And that one.
[Tina:] I'm sure, you know, I was thinking there now, I think... there's a lot of wool in tha, in them.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] It's half wool, half nylon.... And I think that's why you cannot clean them, cos. And if I had my way, they would have
[Josephine:] And there was no nylon around in those days.
[Tina:] If I used this with my way.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] If I had my way, I'd have Axminster straight through the house.
[Josephine:] Or else
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] your way.
[Tina:] ... Well Violet is wasting her time isn't she?... She could have nice now, all ready.
[Josephine:] She could.... there'll be never be any other...... too young for her now.
[Tina:] No, kids there.
[Josephine:] That's why I couldn't keep my eyes!
[Tina:] Mm... yes, but even her spare bedroom needs, she could be doing it up and renting that one.... Couldn't
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] she?... But she won't be able to afford to now! Not right now!
[Josephine:] Mm, she could it rent
[Tina:] While they've got the chance to go.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Oh God, it's her bloody Honda []!
[Tina:] Nice sound.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Tina:] These are the new disabled stickers.
[Josephine:] Oh.... They used to be like that.... They
[Danny:] I i, is it for?
[Josephine:] No, you go in the box.
[Danny:] Yes.
[Tina:] Yeah.... Passport holders.
[Josephine:] Ah?
[Tina:] Passport holders.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] There's one in the G P O.... So where are you gonna put this now?
[Danny:] There's room in the front of the car.
[Josephine:] So, if you'd like to come down and have conversation?
[Tina:] Sue's gone to er... Llangywneth... Nathan, by his brain scan. I don't know, they think that he's got er... dead brain cell or something, yeah?
[Josephine:] Why?
[Tina:] Then here, going... she's now going to.
[Josephine:] It's... the back, the connection, from here to the brain.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] No, there's just something that... not him... here isn't connected to the brain properly.
[Tina:] Is it from here?
[Josephine:] That's... there's something wrong.
[Tina:] Why doesn't try out here.?
[Josephine:] They've done it!....... There's some connection. And they're going to find out what it is that the doctor said....
[Tina:] Do you think they will?
[Josephine:] ....... Er
[Tina:] How will I get one next?
[Josephine:] To, get it then!
[Tina:] But I can't afford to get it at the same time anyway cos he... he won't be down to
[Josephine:] Go get it.
[Tina:] But when I was....
[Josephine:] But er... How much did you pay for that black one?
[Tina:] My black waistcoat?
[Josephine:] Mm.... How do you learn to make a waistcoat out of it?.
[Tina:] .... Like heavy black.
[Josephine:] I like that coat,.... Cos I'm fed up of stuff going all bubbly!
[Tina:] The stuff that the wai, keep a waistcoat... for work.... If anything, it's....... Good God his trousers! Mm? He does know.... I put
[Josephine:] I know!
[Tina:] put him there!... He told me to put him there.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] He signed the papers and all
[Josephine:] Have you done the painting you done?... He relies on.... They can pay redundancy in the end, couldn't do that?... Pay redundancy.
[Tina:] .
[Josephine:] I'll try.
[Tina:] Right.... So when'll she be down now?... Ha?
[Josephine:] I don't know, cos she's going to a friend's for.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] doing tomorrow.... She wants a day in bed,she, breakfast in bed today.
[Tina:] Why?
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] Why does she want a day in bed?
[Josephine:] She just wants to be in bed for a day.
[Tina:] Lazy little bugger!
[Josephine:] ... Put that in jar!
[Tina:] I will put it out of
[Josephine:] God!
[Tina:] sight!... And then... you can go to er... your... [LAUGHTER]!... Right.... Right.
[Josephine:] I think that's horrible!
[Tina:] Right.... Tara! [clock strikes]
[Josephine:] [singing] Ha ha ha ha... ha ha ha ha ha [].
[Tina:] Right, she's took the trousers.
[Josephine:] Has she?
[Tina:] So shall we go round shopping?
[Josephine:] Yes... we'll go round to the to get... Don't know what's the matter.
[Tina:] Oh, it's two more grains in it more than the other I expect!... [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Right? No.... Colder.
[Josephine:] .
[Tina:] Do you think that it's going to snow?
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] Do you think that it's
[Josephine:] No!
[Tina:] going to snow?
[Josephine:] Not dow, not down here anyway.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] Says on the picture it will come to North Wales, but I doubt it.... We shall be a bit cold for that reason... no doubt.
[Tina:] Mm.... Clematis are going up the sticks now!
[Josephine:] Are they?
[Tina:] Mhm.... Except this.... it's going up
[Josephine:] I see them seven pound! ?
[Tina:] No.... They were four, five pound there... and they were only three pound and Wickland... And they're beauties! Th, that's the big one there!... These lovely.
[Josephine:] You get for them.
[Tina:] .... [whistling]... That's
[Josephine:] Oh, she's gone!
[Tina:] One
[Josephine:] Oh.
[Tina:] there... two there and... a little bit there.... Bit better. Perhaps it'll dry out.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm [].... [whistling]
[Tina:] Right, are you gonna get ready and go?
[Josephine:] And they're all tearing round, look at this!
[Tina:] I know!
[Josephine:] Dustbin lorry had it!... They'll be all these visitors campaigning for the election now!
[Tina:] Oh God yes!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Chap your door every five minutes!
[Josephine:] Be telling them then to grow up in er... Westminster.... Not act like a bunch of kids!... They'll soon be potato picking.
[Tina:] Yep.... I see where those sheep have been and grazed those
[Josephine:] Cabbages nearly gone.
[Tina:] cabbages
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] all on.... The grass is growing up through it!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] And all.
[Josephine:] Starting to be the growing.... The grass is green isn't it?
[Tina:] It's a wet month.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] That... that causes... everything to grow!... You know, the growing season.
[Josephine:] Mm.... I wonder why... Cockney won't let you pick
[Tina:] Ooh because the
[Josephine:] their own fruit?
[Tina:] because people pinch you see.... Pinch the... pinch yes.
[Josephine:] Yes, but it's against the law isn't it?
[Tina:] Well I don't know much
[Josephine:] And you can report him for that!
[Tina:] apparently he charges you see.... I don't know, is there a controlled price on... stuff like that?... But it's er... a London ca er... is that an old boy's principle?
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] The way he was brought up I suppose, but... it's a wonder it... it's a wonder he's got any business at all!
[Josephine:] Mm!... Cos everybody's fruit must be in the same way.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Those daffs have gone pale, haven't they?
[Tina:] And I, I,
[Josephine:] They're always dark brown!
[Tina:] If I was you now... I'd go to him and give it to him, I tell you!... You want your money back!... But he won't be there, quite likely!
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] And the girls won't give it back.... But if he's there give it to him an,an... an,an, tell him, you don't want that sort of thing! You've had too many of these sort of things and you don't want any more!... And if he says no... say thank you... we'll see about it!... Was it always a... man?... Who you go to?
[Josephine:] Weights and Measures is it?... Well, stand in a Fair Trading Officer!
[Tina:] That's right... Fair Trading Officer.... You haven't had a fair deal... so... that's the man to go to!... Well, the Town Hall!... Same place.
[Josephine:] No.... Is it?... Different place altogether!
[Tina:] For fair trading?
[Josephine:] He's in Pembroke
[Tina:] Well that's the Town Hall.
[Josephine:] Not Millford not.... There's one for the area.
[Tina:] No, well it's er... the County Town Hall.
[Josephine:] And the next time you go in he'll have bloody rubbish!
[Tina:] Not. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] I'll bet you!
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] He don't care!... Cos it's a market!
[Tina:] I know but you... but you see... if it came... to be something big and serious and it went into the newspaper... he would.... It's bad for business!
[Josephine:] That's down there innit?
[Tina:] I don't know.
[Josephine:] The yellow thing, that's Steve's!... I'm sure it was them.
[Tina:] Ploughing up the road again!
[Josephine:] Well I don't know what they're doing! It... could be outside somebody's house.... [yawning] Oh God [] market day today.
[Tina:] It's open.
[Josephine:] I aren't going to get down there!... I don't think!... About the nearest.... Yep.
[Tina:] .... I'm sick of seeing them all!... They're all dressed in the same.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Right, I shan't be long!... Into battle! I wouldn't give a damn!... I already have.
[Tina:] There's that
[Josephine:] Oh my God, wait a minute!
[Tina:] Looks as though he's.
[Josephine:] She got her silk coat done!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] No, you're not going anyway!... I shall let you know. Can I bring these back?... I bought them yesterday! All three of them!... They're all, urgh! Please.
[speaker002:] Alright love?
[Josephine:] .
[speaker002:] Okay?
[Josephine:] Yeah, thanks!... Ta!
[speaker002:] Do you sell ham? Linda!
[Josephine:] Sorry!
[speaker002:] Sorry! Yeah! Okay!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm []. Sorry about that love!
[Tina:] I didn't give you one on the end but I bought
[Josephine:] I said the thing is... that I pay sixty pence... for... five... well I said it costs me another sixty pence to come and change them!... And er... he said well... they are going off he said, but then
[Tina:] No, they've gone off!
[Josephine:] the girls haven't the time to go through them!
[Tina:] Oh, indeed!... They'll blame somebody but, it weren't his problem!... Did you tell we wouldn't want any more?... Well these are certainly grapes!... [LAUGHTER]... of course it's a... it's... it's a... but the orange season is getting over.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... Anywhere else down here you'd like to go?
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] I went and fetched them off the sheet counter.... [LAUGHTER]... I've come to change them! There was three girls with the sheets!... I said I'd like to change these please.... I said I bought them yesterday... and
[Tina:] Ooh
[Josephine:] they've gone off! Well
[Tina:] Why was this all so... tightly packed?
[Josephine:] Cos that's the bag o, that's rotting isn't it?
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] They don't open them []!
[Tina:] Oh it's alright, yeah.... Doesn't look the same breed as these though.
[Josephine:] Anything down here?
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] And call in anywhere?
[Tina:] Nope.
[Josephine:] Have a mooch?
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Got no money for mooching, no!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Good God! Looking for a silk
[Tina:] Ooh I say, there's a nice lot of flowers in that shop!
[Josephine:] sa, silk.
[Tina:] Ooh!... I don't know what they were.
[Josephine:] Mm.... Nothing down here?... Books.
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Go home.... I don't know where else you can go and look for nice fresh fruit.
[Tina:] Er well I
[Josephine:] There is no fresh fruit about!
[Tina:] The er... the only place here in Millford that I would suggest is er... Fine Fare!... No, well people go and do their shopping in
[Josephine:] Yeah, but a lot of that's packed!
[Tina:] Oh I don't know!
[Josephine:] Mm.... Cor little-un sitting up, sleeping like that!... [singing] Ha ha ha mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] Oh, got a!
[Josephine:] Mm.... Woogh... Everybody looks cold don't they?
[Tina:] Yeah, they do, yes.... Makes you shiver to think of them!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] You remember that man that used to keep that... furniture shop... by Cockney?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Where does he live now?
[Josephine:] By the Post Office.
[Tina:] Oh!...
[Josephine:] Well he still lives in Eaking but it... he's got a shop up by the Post Office.
[Tina:] Oh yes.... Yes, now I remember.
[Josephine:] Got a lot of stuff in there!
[Tina:] When I want a new chair I'll go and have a look at what he's got.
[Josephine:] Nothing!
[Tina:] Hasn't he?
[Josephine:] I don't think he does too much in the furniture!... Unless she's got an upstairs. Maybe I haven't noticed the stairs there.
[Tina:] Well when... when we were there before he'd got a lot there!... There are two little rooms with things in, you know?
[Josephine:] We never went upstairs.
[Tina:] No, I'm sure... that they'd got two little rooms on the ground floor and they were choc-a-block you could hardly get in!
[Josephine:] One room.
[Tina:] Well, it seemed two... two to me!... You know, one opening into the other like a... you couldn't er... you couldn't move!
[Josephine:] No, because that was by the Electric Board!
[Tina:] Oh!... I see the Gas Board... no.... Which is the one nearest Cockney's?
[Josephine:] Electric.
[Tina:] Electric.... Well the people going in and out there as well.
[Josephine:] They're paying their bills, they're... but there's nothing in there!... It's one
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] great big room... empty!
[Tina:] What is that, somebody?... [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] I don't know! Didn't look!... Jehovah's!... Ha, ha, ha, now look at this woman!... Never looked my way!... And if you run her down, it's your bloody fault!... Here's another one look! Look!... Never looks your way!... No place to park!... Here.
[Tina:] My... my.
[Josephine:] He's in there!
[Tina:] Oh, Christ!!
[Josephine:] But I don't think he's got an upstairs!
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] I dunno.... And that's all.... Dental surgeon there now! It used to be a bloody do-it-yourself shop!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Tina:] That's it, by the.
[Josephine:] All sorts of many stuff in there! Lovely shop in there!... Oh oh!... This is one.
[Tina:] He's in that car too!
[Josephine:] They're a bloody pest these kids!... Bikes are dangerous things aren't they?
[Tina:] Mm.... But no, nothing wrong with a bike.... It's the one that is riding it's a... the danger is!
[Josephine:] Yeah, well that's it! They whip
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] in and out and in and out, till
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] you don't know where they are!
[Tina:] In, In Holland... when we were there... motor cars were not allowed on the roads!... It was all push bikes!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] The main street, you know?... Course, there was a... at the far end of the street, a a red... long, long street it was! Very long!... There was factories on it... and of course the workers keep coming in and out.
[Josephine:] Look at the potatoes over there!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Under plastic.... Look at these!
[Tina:] Countryside what?
[Josephine:] Cheatering putting a new label up!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] [sighing] Ahh Oh God, there's scaffolding all around here now!
[Tina:] Mm.... They've put the glass in that.
[Josephine:] I wonder, perhaps it will be a little glass house?... I'd say the band, but there isn't room in it!... For the band to sit is there?
[Tina:] Not really.
[Josephine:] Hello David!
[Tina:] Hello!... No, it's just somewhere to sit in and look out at the... en, er the ships and boats going by.
[Josephine:] It's like a shelter.
[Tina:] Unless they mean to have a marina here are they?
[Josephine:] There's a marina down in the docks!
[Tina:] Oh, I see.... Well perhaps they're going to have races or something if the
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] the...... Couldn't be wider.... The
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] water wouldn't be wide enough.
[Josephine:] Mm.... Very strange!
[Tina:] What shops are they?
[Josephine:] Aha.... Well... this blue van is Parry and Blockwell the garage!... This digging was here.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Weren't it?... Well I'd have thought... I dunno!
[Tina:] By the church.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Mm.... Yes it was, wasn't it? Go down the bottom of the street.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... Hoh ell!... Let's go home!... Is there Internationals on today?
[Tina:] No idea!
[Josephine:] Football?
[Tina:] No idea! It's Friday today.
[Josephine:] I know.
[Tina:] It's football, as a rule, on a Friday innit?
[Josephine:] Oh it's Friday! I keep thinking it's Saturday!... No, there's is there?
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] She's umbrella []!
[Josephine:] Trying to hold it [LAUGHTER] together []!... [yawning] Oh []! A lot of houses for sale!... isn't there?
[Tina:] Yes I've er... that's what makes me wonder and they're... they talk about building more!... The chances are we won't be going!
[Josephine:] They're building more for council houses.... Council tenants.... Homeless... families.
[Tina:] Well they could buy some of these and turn these into council... houses or flats or... something like that.
[Josephine:] Well they could, but they won't!... Cos the people want too much for them!... Anything going on up here?
[Tina:] No, I don't think
[Josephine:] Yep... all looks quiet.... Bet that's getting damp!... And it seems to be in a hole don't it? It's down... it's below the road as
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] well!
[Tina:] Yeah.... I bet he's sorry he.
[Josephine:] I bet he's sorry he started them!
[Tina:] then he got his money in the bank, he was getting interest on it!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] And now deteriorating!
[Josephine:] That's right.... Be nice when you'll be able to go and pick your own strawberries again!
[Tina:] Ah?
[Josephine:] Be nice when you can go and pick your own strawberries again!... These daffs ave come out.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Mm ahhh
[Tina:] I think it's going to be a wet afternoon.
[Josephine:] It's sleety ooking... on the window look!
[Tina:] So I
[Josephine:] You watch the rain hitting the windows, it's like sleet!
[Tina:] Yeah, I think they said that er... you know... be today.
[Josephine:] Yeah!
[Tina:] Is that snow on the mountains?
[Josephine:] Didn't see it.
[Tina:] Looked a bit white, it might be polythene.
[Josephine:] No.... Can't see a mountain from here, we're on the top!... [sighing] Oh []!
[Tina:] Oh I see!
[Josephine:] We ought to have bought some knitting wool.
[Tina:] Ay
[Josephine:] We ought to have bought some knitting wool.... And done something.... Well never mind, you got trousers to shorten.
[Tina:] And that....
[Josephine:] Well you might as well do it and press the two together.
[Tina:] Two together.
[Josephine:] Ey ou got two to shorten now!... Oh God!... Sally says that... cardigan that I knit, that black one, she said tha i, it's lovely to wear she said! It's heavy!... And it doesn't stretch and it... er er er... it looks, it feels good she says!... Aha!
[Tina:] What's that one?
[Josephine:] You know that black one?... She wore it
[Tina:] Oh yes.
[Josephine:] with those black trousers?
[Tina:] Oh that cottony thing?
[Josephine:] The cotton.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] It's lovely stuff to wear! I said how much is it? One eighty a ball she said!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] I said I was thinking of making a waistcoat or something out of one.... And she said it doesn't go bubbly. The only, if anything... it might shrink a little.
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Not much.
[Tina:] But you'd have to hand wash it?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Does she?
[Josephine:] She boils hers and all!... All the white one.
[Tina:] Oh!... Yeah... but er
[Josephine:] Bleaches them and all!
[Tina:] Does she hand wash her woollies?
[Josephine:] Yeah.... So I might make a waistcoat.... A white one.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] For the summer.
[Tina:] Does it go very far?... No, it doesn't.
[Josephine:] Not too far, but it's not bad! Mm.... Look at him strutting along! Is the wind blowing in do you think?
[Tina:] Blowing him along maybe!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Look at these houses!
[Tina:] Oh!... They've let that.... That's nice that one.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Nice and plain.... They're nice lit, little plain one like that... gives you plenty of scope... for a... creeper up the wall don't they?
[Josephine:] I can't stand creepers on the walls! I'm afraid it brings the caterpillars in!
[Tina:] Oh no they don't!
[Josephine:] I dunno.... That's why I can't do it.
[Tina:] But some do.... It all depends on the variety and the
[Josephine:] There's house, we've just passed it now on the and it's er... a Montana Clematis.
[Tina:] Oh ey
[Josephine:] Well it's at, it's all in the bloody attic! It's everywhere!... Oh God, I couldn't have it!... Gives me the creeps!... That's what I'd be scared of... otherwise I'd put one.... That's it!
[Tina:] Do you want it or not?
[Josephine:] Mhm.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm [].... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm [].... Ooh!... Now it's starting.... Come in the... afternoon.... Oh oh!... And they'll be looking for... not for me I don't expect!... Ooh that's better! Get [LAUGHTER] in the corner []!... Watch your wires!... Go on!... Come on! Right. That's it!
[Danny:] The er... here.
[Josephine:] Do you think we're gonna have snow?... I hope not!
[Danny:] I'll tell you.
[Josephine:] Not, then yeah.... [LAUGHTER].
[Danny:] I told you
[Josephine:] . Oh I don't know! I don't know!... How much?
[Danny:] Twenty.
[Josephine:] You've had the two.... I think, yep.
[Danny:] Lovely! Ta
[Josephine:] So what they gonna build behind you, another garage? Is it?
[Danny:] Mhm.
[Josephine:] Be alright won't it?
[Danny:] Oh yeah, it's a big.
[Josephine:] Could be you extending?... other shop do you think?
[Danny:] It's all we know.
[Josephine:] What shop's down there?
[Danny:] It's all the same one at the back.
[Josephine:] Yeah but how many, how many times has it been a shop?... You don't seem to ge, er often does it?
[Danny:] No.......
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Tell you what'll end up there...
[Josephine:] So you wanna extend this back, this is in the right place this!
[Danny:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Cos it... people come off the sites... or go to the corner shop, don't cross the road.
[Danny:] Yeah, if that was... where that garage is and all of this was clear it'd be great wouldn't it!
[Josephine:] Yeah, you'd have your pull in as well!
[Danny:] .
[Josephine:] Go on... think about it!
[Danny:] Ooh, you never give up!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Well this is it?
[Danny:] ... of the...
[Josephine:] Oh the... the car people, it used to be!
[Danny:] We've already got
[Josephine:] Oh!
[Danny:] a garage... down the end there....
[Josephine:] If it was you see, they'd be quick enough coming to tell you! Ey... Right... tara... Thanks!
[Susan:] Snotty, drizzly, runny noses!
[Josephine:] the parents' fault!
[Susan:] everything he asked me to.
[Josephine:] He'll always, always, always do that!
[Susan:] Where does he get it from?
[Josephine:] You!
[Susan:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Josephine:] Always!
[Susan:] It's because you said to me!
[Josephine:] Well I'll.
[Susan:] Cos I says, when they do, you better have all the bloody jokes about that!
[Josephine:] No!
[Ricky:] There's big guys in rugby.
[Susan:] It's there when I put
[Steve:] Put some and some fingers
[Susan:] Mm?
[Steve:] I just wish you hadn't got the glasses.
[Susan:] It's for people
[Steve:] Is it to eat as well.
[Susan:] Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna be
[Josephine:] Well you won't have bloody!
[Susan:] No!... But I don't go round do I?... Running round, bumming round.... Ah?........
[Ricky:] Who me?
[Susan:] Mm.... I can't really sit them together, they're not relations!
[Ricky:] I've got fishing tomorrow.
[Steve:] I reckon it's not worth worrying about! Let's just leave that for now!
[Susan:] You're right!
[Steve:] I know.... Change it round then she won't come next time!... That's right.... gonna like it! You look more natural.
[Susan:] , cos we thought about getting a.............. We'll just be, be about open.
[Steve:] [whistling]... Well, didn't you... tell them we're going out tonight separately... and then there's the...
[Josephine:] ... well the thing is whatever they do to it now it's going to last for...
[Susan:] Two years.
[Josephine:] two years innit?
[Steve:] I dunno cos it's had a new exhaust on it.... And a new battery!
[Susan:] God bless.
[Josephine:] Who has?
[Susan:] I think
[Steve:] New brakes!
[Susan:] she's tired!
[Steve:] Two, three new tyres on.... Two new cy, cylinder!
[Josephine:] You can look after it now!
[Steve:] ... I wa, I'm gonna pick him up!
[Susan:] And not, come here!
[Steve:] If I get it through the M O T next February....... Here! Take that.... So that's just something.
[Josephine:] You've had your money's worth out of the new stuff
[Steve:] Well that's right!
[Josephine:] then!
[Steve:] Yeah. [clock strikes]
[Susan:] Grandfather clock.... More colder is it?
[Josephine:] That one.
[Ricky:] That one?... Ding... That'd get on my nerves every day!
[Susan:] How many is it?
[Ricky:] Knives and forks.
[Susan:] It's not long enough!
[Josephine:] Out here, in a minute.
[Susan:] Give them to me!...
[Ricky:] Yeah well only talk about fishing, you see? I'm gonna be fishing all around the boat!
[Steve:] No, not for long.
[Ricky:] But I got a good one!... I've been getting getting out fish.
[Steve:] Don't... you can catch fish
[Ricky:] Well... I'm gonna wait for while!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Ricky:] I'm afraid I'm gonna wait until it, cos you gotta wait for all of the salmon to come... up river.
[Steve:] Rubbish!... Rubbish!
[Ricky:] Because
[Steve:] If you catch a trout... you should catch it before
[Susan:] Not with flies!
[Josephine:] He's catching trout and he's
[Ricky:] No, I'm fly fishing!
[Steve:] catching salmon now!
[Ricky:] No way!
[Steve:] No!... There's a... there's all that fish...
[Susan:] So you like fishing?
[Steve:] Especially fresh water.
[Ricky:] Yeah!... Gotta go up the river as well!
[Steve:] Well where did he caught the fish?
[Ricky:] Down the bottom by Liam's, that's where he caught them!
[Steve:] Down river, or was it up the river?
[Ricky:] It's a river! You can't fly fish here!... Yes
[Steve:] I
[Ricky:] you can!... There's the bridges!
[Josephine:] I said, well he said, it's two bridges.
[Ricky:] Two bridges.
[Susan:] There's a road, you can't... cross them!... The bridge here with another on?
[Josephine:] How long is it?
[Steve:] Where he goes fishing, it's, the bridge is up
[Ricky:] Not me!... No
[Steve:] She was that!
[Danny:] I only do fly fishing!... As a rule.
[Susan:] Ah Jack does!
[Danny:] You ought to see it!... See the fish that we catch!
[Susan:] Carp for cooking.
[Steve:] Aspic's.
[Susan:] I don't.
[Ricky:] going down the right?..., five years old... down the river was the first time ever but just have to wait for him!
[Steve:] Oh!
[Ricky:] Two... two traps....
[Susan:] Get your hands off it!
[Ricky:] No!
[Steve:] Ricky!... Come on!
[Ricky:] Granddad's..., are you gonna eat it?
[Steve:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Yeah.... Yes indeed!
[Susan:] Do you want me to fetch those?
[Steve:] ... I go fly fishing.... You'll love fly fishing!...... You wanna see it!
[Susan:] When you gonna take me then?
[Steve:] You cast out... you see them... you see that fish!... And your lines...... and then you tease it!....
[Susan:] teasing it?... I'll do it twice, and then tease it!
[Ricky:] Same to you!...
[Steve:] I was talking about the club and... and that... she was there!... Then fishing... you know,.....
[Susan:] ?
[Steve:] I don't know what it was?... This is Bermondsey
[Josephine:] No.
[Steve:] just take the cover.... One of the lads had... nicked it... started cooking it!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Ricky:] So Scott!
[Steve:] .
[Ricky:] Dad!... Scott and
[Steve:] end up with bait!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Steve:] ... bloody eating it!
[Ricky:] Scott and, they caught a squid in Scotland... for bait now!
[Steve:] That's
[Ricky:] Yeah.... And then his mum goes, what's that in the fridge? I said squid. Get it out of here!...
[Susan:] Oh... is it?
[Josephine:] I've tried... brains.
[Ricky:] Oh,... my dad
[Steve:] Yeah we heard that other.
[Ricky:] I got more chance of catching a fish now cos we're going Saturday and Sunday!
[Steve:] That's good and it's a... what was this name?...... [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] She were you know, shaped in rings!... And she eat... she eat it!
[Steve:] [LAUGHTER]
[Susan:] That's!
[Steve:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Susan:] Well it is only... I've eat it!
[Josephine:] Oh!... No!
[Susan:] They weren't big enough.
[Ricky:] dad, did you get that T V from Comet?... The town Comet? Shall we
[Susan:] You want all yo, all your stuff from Ben in the
[Steve:] Bag.
[Susan:] I put all.
[Steve:] .
[Susan:] Oh!... Excuse me, don't say no! It's like being in Switzerland, you pay your brother's!... You've had warm weather out here. It needs to come down here.
[Steve:] ... I'll drop it down a peg.... On one television...... so they're forty eight years old... and they've never been.
[Ricky:] I would want to save one now.
[Susan:] I like it.
[Steve:] It's definitely... don't
[Josephine:] Did Ricky do this?
[Steve:] it's just that... er
[Danny:] she's been in.... Special offer... on Sunday.... Is a...... three or four each...
[Steve:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Yeah.... And a hundred and fifty to cost.
[Susan:] Even after he comes in.
[Steve:] Come in!
[Josephine:] Fourteen... forty
[Steve:] No!
[Susan:] No!
[Ricky:] Fourteen inch television, one in each room!
[Susan:] Excuse me!... They won't!
[Danny:] That's... slightly.
[Josephine:] One hundred and eighty five?
[Danny:] Yeah... one eighty five... I paid seven hundred and twenty five pound!...
[Josephine:] Is that?
[Danny:] Seven hundred and twenty five
[Susan:] It was my plan to get one though.
[Danny:] But, it's er... it's
[Josephine:] It's a marvellous thing!
[Steve:] They are! Yeah, but that's, mine had some
[Josephine:] And now they're telling you, you got the video aren't they?
[Steve:] And they'll give you... a one year... warrantee....
[Ricky:] And then granddad's got any videos,.
[Josephine:] ....
[Danny:] ...... it's... to buy that picture... a thou... a thousand pounds!... That's what
[Susan:] Rude, innit?
[Steve:] ....
[Josephine:] If you got.
[Ricky:] And!
[Susan:] What?
[Ricky:] Erm, Derek said, and Derek said that erm... that he now hoping you'd go down and stay when they get naughty pictures!
[Steve:] Yeah,!
[Josephine:] ! But the thing is, if you fall out of bed you ain't gonna sleep!
[Steve:] Cos they... their trouble that I... I... and away!... They says, well I...... here we go, on the chair... count to ten!... Divide by... the number of... that's not.
[Ricky:] That could be.
[Susan:] It's very full now!....
[Ricky:] You count that.
[Steve:] It's still going.
[Danny:] Just don't change it!...
[Josephine:] don't say nothing about it! Yes.
[Susan:] All your deck chairs.....
[Josephine:] .... For running people's?
[Susan:] Yeah.
[Ricky:] Yeah!
[Steve:] Oh yeah!
[speaker002:] Well... but I don't see why!
[Ricky:] Just cos
[Susan:] Well Hayden says to me, if you go either give me a ring, he said, and I.
[Danny:] Yeah, we'll have to do some work out....... Which is the or the... fourteen inch television... colour telly... I know... because, the blokes let us down!
[Susan:] No, Hayden says if we go to Comet... cos he said, cos I said I bought my video at Comet and they were offering... twenty five per cent off..., twenty five per cent off... off the at Comet... so that's about the third of the place.
[Steve:] Oh!
[Susan:] So he didn't,
[Josephine:] You get twenty five percent off.
[Susan:] We had fifty percent off the price you see!... total.
[Danny:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] What about after sales service?
[Susan:] Who Comet?... Well I asked Comet fridge!
[Danny:] , that's what she means!
[Susan:] Comet do it.
[Steve:] Well... they're.... I mean... when I had... we got C D serviced.
[Susan:] ... And Don
[Josephine:] And I
[Susan:] come and said sixty pound! No, but it be beneficial... if it's Comet... and the receipt came back for our insurance from Comet... erm
[Ricky:] Dixons!
[Danny:] They're all, they're all same,
[Susan:] They're all the same.
[Danny:] Comet and
[Susan:] Yes.
[Danny:] it's all owned by Kingfisher.
[Susan:] Kingfisher.... Because if we bought the fridge and the at Comet... and collected the receipts back on the insurance.... He said they're all the same.... They're owned by Kingfisher,.... We... we bought this fridge... from Comet... to keep the insurance
[Danny:] I was...... Oh it's still working, yes. [clock strikes]
[Steve:] ...... and he says that...
[Susan:] Well at least it's pounds off.
[Josephine:] Yeah, well mum's telly eleven.... And they said to her now, not to insure it. When it's gone, it's now.
[Susan:] .
[Danny:] ... I tell you what you. It's something like a...
[Susan:] How much did it cost last time?
[Josephine:] I'm them over.
[Susan:] Paul's mother's flipping well angry!
[Ricky:] Last time he... that's my....
[Susan:] Why does?... He, he might say to me you can't use.
[Danny:] That's a load of nonsense!
[Susan:] But I said to them, take that cheque.
[Steve:] Oh... fucking hell!............. Because... mum's territory is there... you got a few people complained!... And it's.
[Josephine:] And sure it was.... It's like I've got nothing to do!... The....
[Susan:] It's all downstairs.
[Josephine:] We've asked them to try. They're here to celebrate the.
[Susan:] How long till you're back in your now then mum?
[Steve:] You want to be sure of Comet.... Ask... where's my dealer?
[Josephine:] Where's the after sales service come from?
[Steve:] Oh, especially with a....
[Danny:] Mm.... Why didn't he give you some Hotpoints?
[Susan:] ... But who'd buy it then?
[Steve:] ...
[Danny:] That's where I've gotta go, yeah.
[Susan:] No you, you go down, off... and she said you can full holidays arranged daily, and we came... that was on the Tuesday, the Wednesday I had to phone them, done on Friday!... And they'll
[Josephine:] .
[Steve:] That erm
[Josephine:] I'll never know!
[Steve:] ....
[Josephine:] I don't want that!
[Steve:] ...
[Susan:] Oh yeah!
[Josephine:] That's Yeah, and that's nice!
[Steve:] Claimed about... half of it.
[Josephine:] Never heard of it!
[Susan:] Oh I know
[Steve:] anytime... She might have been....
[Josephine:] Or round?
[Steve:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] on the Monday.
[Steve:] It takes four
[Ricky:] Ah?
[Steve:] or five....
[Josephine:] You can look!
[Danny:] Mm....
[Steve:] Hard cash!......
[Josephine:] That one's a daisy!... Innit beautiful!
[Steve:] ... if you've got a T V...... remote control things......... Once he'd said that he'd.... So you're lucky!..., at least you know.... Cos there's one problem that... if you tape a programme.......
[Danny:] Mm.
[Steve:] And all I remember is the... then afterward....
[Josephine:] Well that's
[Ricky:] You can't ask I suppose?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Steve:] Yeah.
[Ricky:] And it's three
[Danny:] And they want
[Ricky:] forty the video innit?... We could've had a... two forty video tape, it said, two forty on it... and when we put it in weren't it?....
[Steve:] ...
[Ricky:] Said two forty on it, didn't it?
[Steve:] Two forty box!... Oh I shall.
[speaker002:] You can buy one video from here.
[Ricky:] Oh well
[speaker002:] How much does that cost?
[Danny:] Only one eighty.
[speaker002:] How much did that cost?...
[Ricky:] He just, he just
[speaker002:] I do, you put it in the big shop didn't you?
[Ricky:] I put it in, okay
[speaker002:] , over er... the pub at the end.
[Ricky:] You put it in, you don't go onto, you don't pay.
[Danny:] Well we got so... Phillips on the, on the sheet... and er... they're all.......... They're... he got all the videos from the States, in the States.... Sent over all these blooming... instructions for the video was all I needed!... And the American system
[Steve:] ...... from Argentina and er...... just... you got the switch?
[Danny:] Yeah, you got the
[Ricky:] No.
[Danny:] switch here.
[Steve:] But his accommodation over there.
[Josephine:] Unless you.......
[Danny:] Is that out there?
[Ricky:] She's coming back in the.... cos she just took them off and then... and now... now she owes me something posh. [LAUGHTER]... And now.
[speaker002:] So where do you get your television teletext then?
[Ricky:] all in the remote control for the lot!....
[speaker002:] We were looking at the and not teletext.
[Josephine:] Which is the smaller any more.
[speaker002:] No!... Not the one we looked at.
[Josephine:] Well mine and nana's isn't teletext.
[speaker002:] They're not all teletext?
[Steve:] No, course they're not!...
[speaker002:] Well it just shows
[Ricky:] The brand new ones.
[speaker002:] twenty, twenty one inch and not all of them with this.
[Josephine:] You can do it?
[Ricky:] Are they
[speaker002:] about
[Ricky:] about three. What? [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Oh!
[Ricky:] All you do... turn on the thing
[Josephine:] No, you let him show me alright?
[Susan:] No just show
[Josephine:] Yeah, alright then I won't move yet... Where do I keep
[Steve:] ...
[Josephine:] Mm.... But he does to me!
[Danny:] ...
[Josephine:] Oh right!
[Ricky:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Well I'm
[Danny:] Yes.
[Josephine:] put down.
[Ricky:] Do you have to?
[Josephine:] Yeah, well... Ah but I... walked through... u
[Susan:] Can he go out?
[Steve:] Oh yeah.
[Susan:] He's going now!
[Josephine:] Right!
[Sally:] before it be, be uncomfortable
[Josephine:] will it?
[Sally:] for him. But I'm inclined to
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Sally:] get a general impression right, cos
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Sally:] I'm finding something totally wrong with... and got shot of it... and then things have been
[Josephine:] Well actually he didn't, but he says
[Sally:] worse... thinking he'd been to solicitors... but I'm trying to track down anybody! Just trying to get some information.
[Mark:] Apparently... oh my God tha... they're that much within the law.
[Sally:] Yeah, that's what we've been told.
[Mark:] They must have a legal section cos this is one of the biggest organisations, leisure group in Britain
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Mark:] for caravans.... They, they, they,... they own
[Josephine:] They're going to clear themselves aren't they?
[Mark:] You clear you!
[Sally:] More than that! Apparently
[Mark:] They're not going to
[Sally:] one man told me, he said well if you think you might get some money at the end of the season, he said, you may find that you'll be paying them at the end of the season!
[Mark:] I mean, what's the good of it?
[Sally:] Yeah, you see!
[Mark:] Well we may as well have got that money and thrown it down the toilet!
[Sally:] Gone straight in the bin!
[Josephine:] Well that's right!
[Sally:] Straight away this year, you get a list through... now, do you want winter cleaning done, curtains cleaned,
[Mark:] Yeah.
[Ricky:] carpets cleaned, upholstery cleaned?... Or outside valet, do you want the underneath painted with grease and everything?
[Josephine:] I say we did have it done.
[Sally:] By the time you add all that up... if you're not local.
[Josephine:] All your profit's gone!
[Sally:] You'll... you will end up paying them!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Yes.
[Sally:] And then we paid for a winter clean.... And it's filthy!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Sally:] I had to go down there twice
[Mark:] To get it done!
[Sally:] Okay? Because the windows were filthy!
[Mark:] Twice, that we argued.
[Tina:] Well, well... you came here didn't you when the curtains hadn't been
[Josephine:] Jump down then Phillip!
[Sally:] And when I spoke to Mr, I said well... if I was renting a caravan and went to see it and it was dirty like that, I wouldn't want to take it on!... And, I said surely you have somebody who goes round and checks them before they're let?... No, he said!... So what they do is, apparently they wait for somebody to complain
[Mark:] Yeah.
[Sally:] and then they look at the caravan!
[Josephine:] Do they?
[Sally:] That's somebody who comes up to rent it!... So I said and in that case then... probably... you move them into another caravan?... Oh no, we clean it and... they go into it! I said, you mean to say people wait around while you clean the caravan? I don't believe it!
[Mark:] You're alright, you're alright for your holiday, find a caravan dirty, you've gotta complain before it gets cleaned!... Ha!... People will!
[Josephine:] They can complain to the Tourist Board.
[Mark:] to be done when he was he.... Should be bloody licensed!
[Sally:] You can did you say?
[Josephine:] You can.
[Sally:] You can't!... Well I shouldn't think so because
[speaker002:] Mum!
[Sally:] they're not gonna want to know!
[Josephine:] They don't belong there.
[Sally:] Yeah.... and you can't complain to th, the Chamber of Commerce because... if they show this up too much...
[speaker002:] Temby's [] gonna lose a lot of trade! [LAUGHTER] I don't want
[Mark:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Sally:] I mean
[Mark:] They have their, their...
[Sally:] I said to him we've been conned! I said we've been stitched up! That's how I look at it!... I was furious last week!... Mm, so I ju, I was just trying to find, but you see, there again you're new people, we found new people last week didn't we.
[Mark:] Yeah.
[Sally:] He wasn't happy... that man.... He bought a big caravan, he was very unhappy!... There we are!... The way they do
[Josephine:] No, but these caravans
[Mark:] Should you carry on?
[Josephine:] I don't know, is it here or over there?....
[Sally:] So you see, this is only way you can them!... Get to a situation where you've had a caravan before... and to make any money to pay, you've then got to... buy another caravan... to subsidise that one... and you seem to be... it's sort of like a chain all time.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Tina:] And the profit you've had from one is paying the expense of the other!
[Sally:] Tha, if you're lucky!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Sally:] I mean we heard some horrendous stories last week, walking round didn't we?
[Mark:] Yeah, we did.
[Sally:] ... Cor talk about make your curl!... Dreadful!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Sally:] So... as I say, but I'm just resigned to it!
[Josephine:] So what would you have to do now then?... Take your caravan off?
[Sally:] We can't!
[Mark:] Not allowed to move it!
[Sally:] We co, I mean, what do you do? You lose the money you've paid for the site!... Cos you can't take the site!
[Mark:] Paid for the site!... Plus the value of a brand new caravan!, they check!... A lot of people buy these on!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Mark:] Just pay cash
[speaker002:] Mum!
[Mark:] for them.
[Sally:] What darling?
[Mark:] In the end we're gonna out.
[speaker002:] Can we?
[Mark:] We feel
[speaker002:] Mm?
[Mark:] we're gonna lose not only... any money that we get back on it, but we lose... the letting money
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Mark:] we lose the investment!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Mark:] We lose the
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Mark:] out of the capital!... You see?... That's not a business venture!
[Sally:] Well it is for them!... That's right!
[Mark:] For them it is, yeah it's a good one for them!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] They're too big to fight, that's the trouble isn't it?
[Mark:] Are they?
[Sally:] That's what everybody says! I see, I'm, I... can't accept that, there's gotta be a way
[Mark:] No!
[Sally:] round it!
[Mark:] No, I'm afraid not!
[Sally:] I mean I don't care! I've, I've threatened him! I will be outside with a placard! Do not buy a caravan on Field Park!... I've threatened him, that's what I'm going to do!
[Mark:] of the er erm....
[Sally:] I've seen it done last week,.
[Mark:] Throw a brick through his windows!
[Josephine:] There's been nothing done!
[Sally:] I'd love to do it to him! Well I've got to.
[Mark:] Hang on!... We don't know what that.
[Josephine:] pain!
[Mark:] Alright!
[Josephine:] , was you was down here when I washed the caravan?
[speaker002:] No.
[Sally:] No, it was dark haired boy.
[speaker002:] Was it?... I know about your microwave.
[Sally:] Ha?
[speaker002:] I know about your microwave.... I used
[Sally:] What?
[speaker002:] I used to know your husband,.
[Sally:] Yeah?
[speaker002:] .
[Sally:] Was he pissed?
[speaker002:] Yeah.... What it
[Sally:] See what
[speaker002:] is now... When I drop this one round I'll tell you about then.
[Sally:] Yes.
[speaker002:] Okay?... Er
[Josephine:] Will we have hot water?
[speaker002:] Well
[Josephine:] Don't say no, cos I'm going home!
[speaker002:] Er
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] You can... What it is, there's new laws
[Josephine:] That's right.
[speaker002:] coming out now, it's no, nothing to do with us.... There shouldn't be any water heaters in bathrooms, okay?... Right? Now... we're gonna get it moved... okay? You can use it, but it's at your own... risk, alright?...
[Tina:] Oh that's
[Sally:] Well that's too
[Josephine:] Oh my God now!
[Mark:] Well what... what happened? What are we sure's gonna happen as far as?
[speaker002:] Well what it is... you've used it all last year haven't you? Right?... All you wanna to do is the ventilation on it.
[Sally:] Do you?
[speaker002:] Okay? Er
[Sally:] Oh.
[speaker002:] All, all our vans now are... are to be re-flued.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Are you with me?
[Josephine:] Yeah, cos we saw one in that
[speaker002:] Oh that's right.
[Josephine:] kitchen....
[speaker002:] That's right.... But what it is... er... they've been like that for years, like, in the bathrooms
[Sally:] To daddy.
[speaker002:] and all!... You know, I mean... all it is... like I say, it's... I'd use it, put it that way.... Right
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] I'd use it.... Er, I would not have worries about it.
[Josephine:] But if something went wrong then do you?
[speaker002:] Well all I do Come on! well... I suppose it could be done.
[Josephine:] It would?
[speaker002:] Well all it is, is er... the fumes Mum! given off from it.... Are you with me?
[Mark:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Like say, if you were in there like and you've got a closed door Mummy, there could be a build of fumes. When we going? Do you see what I mean?
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] You know, that, that's the only thing... er
[Mark:] Alright.
[speaker002:] what it's about, like.
[Mark:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] You know?... It's not dangerous or anything, like, it's not gonna blow up or anything like that!... It's just a carbon monoxide
[Mark:] Yeah but as far as it's sa
[Tina:] Enough to kill you!
[Mark:] Yeah, but as far as it's B S standards go, if it's not B S standard approved
[speaker002:] No.
[Mark:] that's the insurance on the
[speaker002:] No, well
[Mark:] boiler.
[speaker002:] That's right.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Mark:] So then are you telling me that these people are renting this place out?
[speaker002:] No, you can't rent it out until it's done you see?
[Mark:] So when was that... when was that done?
[speaker002:] This week.
[Sally:] We come in in here last week!
[Mark:] People were here last week then?
[speaker002:] Well I don't know that.... Who, who put them in there?... Town Park?
[Mark:] Yeah.... Who's the, who's, who's, who's the boss up here today?
[Josephine:] Yes, old age pensioners they were!
[Sally:] I don't believe they were mind!... Because the
[speaker002:] I don't think there was anyone in here this week!
[Sally:] still on the.
[speaker002:] I don't think there was anyone in here
[Sally:] Should be here.
[speaker002:] this week!
[Sally:] Two people.
[Mark:] Who's, who's, who, who's, who's the boss today up there?
[speaker002:] Well you wanna see er... David.
[Mark:] David?
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Mark:] And he's there now is he?
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Mark:] Okay.
[speaker002:] Have a word with him.... But that's what it is. I can't help with nothing else.
[Josephine:] Well that
[speaker002:] said erm... supposed to use it like, yeah.
[Mark:] As far as the leg, as far as getting the... the flue sorted out in this, how long do you reckon it'll take?
[Tina:] What do you say now?
[speaker002:] Er
[Sally:] I know what!
[speaker002:] Well, like I said, one of his contractors are going out to, like.
[Mark:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] That's why I like to know how... when they're gonna do it like.
[Mark:] So this caravan can't be rented out until it's sorted out, like?
[speaker002:] That's right.
[Mark:] Yeah.... And you don't know how long it's gonna be?
[speaker002:] Er... I don't.... I don't know how long it's gonna be, you know what I mean, I just
[Mark:] So... who covers the loss on the caravan and on the rental?
[speaker002:] that's not my
[Mark:] So it's Dave again?
[speaker002:] that's not my place!
[Sally:] Listen, you could
[speaker002:] He's the General Manager, like.
[Mark:] Yeah that's
[Tina:] Debbie should of come down.
[Mark:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] But er... that's, that's the reason for it like, you know?
[Tina:] Well why... what did you say then?
[Josephine:] We came down to wash the caravan
[speaker002:] Yes.... Yeah.
[Josephine:] And on the windows was the had all been serviced.
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] And that... blue thing now has gone on since! Tha, with red signs of all, across it!
[speaker002:] Yeah... oh.... Well they're doing them all now, for service
[Josephine:] Now, we were... washing
[speaker002:] you know?
[Josephine:] washing the caravan on the Sunday
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] and people were to come in here on the Tuesday.
[speaker002:] Oh, well I I thought, I don't know.
[Josephine:] A bus load er a... four, three or four bus loads from
[Tina:] Lancashire somewhere.
[Josephine:] Lancashire or North of England somewhere.
[speaker002:] Saying there was, what say?... Bus loads?
[Josephine:] Three or four bus... three or four bus loads of.
[Tina:] Old age pensioners!
[Josephine:] Pensioners!
[speaker002:] Last week?
[Tina:] So they said!
[Josephine:] That's what they told us!... Cos I said there's no way I'd sleep in it myself!... Cos it was too damp!
[speaker002:] Well we never had any... last week!
[Tina:] Well somebody said it....
[speaker002:] I I... I might, I might be wrong like!... You know.
[Tina:] Well that's what they said!
[speaker002:] I never see [LAUGHTER] []!
[Josephine:] You'll see a bus up there won't you?
[Sally:] Cos I'll.
[Tina:] We're learning
[speaker002:] Are you, are you sure it was this week, it was supposed to be? No, not next week?
[Josephine:] Last week, cos I had to get it all! I had to have the bedding in here.
[speaker002:] Mum, can I?
[Tina:] You see the, the boy
[Sally:] I mean
[Tina:] that, that just got out?
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Tina:] He, it's his weeks holiday and he was going to come down
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Tina:] here for the week.
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Now, there's no water here!
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Well, no hot water!
[Sally:] Well that's what they told us,
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Sally:] and that's why we've
[speaker002:] Well that's... like I say, with the
[Josephine:] We must have the caravan finished!
[Mark:] the thermostat.... Yeah, like I said... with the actual water heater there, it's been, there's been water heaters in caravans like that for years!
[Josephine:] When we to
[speaker002:] You know what I mean?
[Josephine:] We only had this at the end of the
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] summer.... And we've had trouble with it
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] all the time!
[speaker002:] Yeah.... But er... like I said, the fluing part of it, is, is out of our hands. It's not
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] it's not us who's put that on.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] You know what I mean?
[Tina:] The what, pardon?
[speaker002:] The actual water heater, the re-flueing of it.
[Tina:] Oh!... Oh!
[speaker002:] You know, the, the
[Sally:] The gas people.
[speaker002:] it's... yeah the gas council and all, like, these new bloody laws they've bought in like!
[Sally:] That's right.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[speaker002:] That's why you can see they've all had them
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] they've had to extend the pipes... all this and that like, you know?
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] But it's down to be getting moved.... You know what I mean?... But that's all it is, because it's in a confined space... and with a shower going they're worried about fumes and all like, you know, the carbon monoxide, like, you know?
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] But er... put it this way, I've been on courses, like I wouldn't... I use it.... You know what I mean?
[Sally:] Mm.
[speaker002:] Cos er... like I say, if I'd had a window open or so... you know what I mean?
[Josephine:] That's right..
[Tina:] And all if it's a little nippy you.... is it?
[speaker002:] But I said, that they've been in bathrooms for years like!... You know they... and smaller bathrooms than that like!
[Josephine:] Oh, well I don't know what to do!
[speaker002:] But like I said, it... it's just, it's gonna get moved like, no cost to you like, you know what I mean?... It's er
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Tina:] But an advantage to them! Is that what you mean?
[Sally:] But if something went wrong then, this caravan was burnt... that's the end of it!
[speaker002:] They... might just take those down.
[Sally:] Well i, cos the co, the insurance wouldn't cover it?
[Josephine:] Cos they have got these records... will have these records.
[speaker002:] No, you'll have a certificate then, and all, saying that the caravan covered, it'll be tested every year then.
[Sally:] So it isn't going to be used this week?
[Josephine:] But, no
[speaker002:] You know?
[Josephine:] not this week.
[speaker002:] No, not this week.
[Josephine:] So we shall lose our insurance?
[speaker002:] ... like that, yeah.
[Tina:] ... innit?... See that man and woman that, yeah?... Did you see these people in there?
[Mark:] What people?
[Josephine:] A man and a woman.
[Tina:] There was two people sitting there.
[Josephine:] They've just gone out.
[Mark:] No.
[Josephine:] After you came.
[Tina:] Well they've, they bought a... a caravan down here, a brand new one!
[Mark:] Yeah.
[Tina:] And they bought it last summer... and they've had trouble ever since!
[Sally:] And they're going around asking people what!
[Mark:] What's up with their's then?
[Josephine:] Well they've had to move the caravan!
[Tina:] It was dirty and damp and...!
[Sally:] They're going round the caravans.... [radio on]
[Josephine:] Ay
[Sally:] he hasn't come.... Oh!
[Tina:] Here Ricky!
[Ricky:] Yeah.
[Tina:] I'd like one of your crisps.
[Mark:] Any one would think that you were tired all day!
[Josephine:] Now we.
[Mark:] And you weren't told there was gonna be?
[Josephine:] No.
[Mark:] What the hell are they talking about?
[Josephine:] Nothing! We knew that they were testing them, and checking it over... and bringing it up to standard, but we didn't know anything about it other than that!
[Sally:] Only.
[Ricky:] You... take one, that's your one.
[Tina:] Lovely!
[Josephine:] Well it wasn't me anyway, I don't know!... Oh Mark'll be fuming that's for sure!
[Ricky:] Can he do?
[Josephine:] No.
[Ricky:] But what's in it for me?....... Ooh ooh!... How do you do it?...?
[speaker002:] Alright?
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Well I don't know what to do now?
[speaker002:] I'll tell you what to do.
[Josephine:] Do you?
[Sally:] Here without a damn thing, you can't use it can you?... What do you think?
[speaker002:] ... you know?... They never asked me if they could or the flue in so it's
[Sally:] That's right, say it like that!
[speaker002:] never been... repaired.
[Sally:] neglecting the.
[speaker002:] Well having said, what, what is it all about? It's because... the no, no water heater should be in the bathrooms!
[Sally:] So where's that gonna go then?
[speaker002:] Well it must either go in the kitchen or in the cupboard somewhere, but you know?... That's what they've er... put it to.
[Josephine:] what you said to me.
[speaker002:] Oh yeah.
[Sally:] Oh well we'll have to move won't we?
[speaker002:] Yeah.... It's working, like gas-wise, like I say, it is... it's virtually, it's just the ventilation clearing out the... the fumes... which are given
[Sally:] Mm.
[speaker002:] off from it.... Do you see what I mean?
[Sally:] Well it is... isn't there a, there's a chimney above there isn't there?
[speaker002:] Yeah.... That's right, yeah, but... but now... like I said, you're gonna have to, to have your certain pipes.... Like, have you seen them all going round? They got long poles on the back step.
[Sally:] Will it'll be longer than that?
[speaker002:] No... cos they haven't done this one... because it shouldn't be in here!
[Josephine:] Even in the fire?
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Sally:] Right.
[speaker002:] Yeah, I mean, it shouldn't be in here, like, that's why they haven't... that's why they've put it there. That's why they hung on the to the shipment cos these aren't supposed to be in... the bathrooms.
[Sally:] Right.
[speaker002:] You know what I mean.... You know?... The
[Sally:] Alright
[speaker002:] I think there'll be a lot of people who won't move off... to be honest!
[Sally:] They won't do?
[speaker002:] , cos they won't er... go to the cost of them.... But, like I say, we're covering that, like.... You know what I mean?...
[Sally:] Hoh
[Mark:] He's bloody!
[Josephine:] He didn't know. He doesn't know, he's the only one I can think of.
[Tina:] He, he's, he's not in a position to say whether he knows or not.
[Josephine:] He says he doesn't know!
[Tina:] Oh!... No, well I
[Josephine:] It's nothing to do with him!
[Tina:] It's not his department.
[Josephine:] But he said there is a gang going round, and some are putting the chimneys on... and the others are going in and doing the flues. And he said, it looks as though they've put the chimney on and found that the flue is the ba... the boiler's in the bathroom, so they've had to come down here.... Said because it shouldn't have a chimney on it!... But he said, I don't know it's no, nothing to do with me! It's the
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Bri... it's the British Gas that's doing it!
[Tina:] Oh... well that's right he's gotta blame somebody!
[Josephine:] But he said, I would do it because I know, I've worked for the Gas board!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] I would know how to handle it.... I said, well there's one thing certain, I can't!...
[Tina:] Perhaps, pay good money for it!
[Sally:] You said somebody wanted to know about.
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] No, it, it,
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] and she's going round, she's gonna try and take them to court!
[Sally:] So she should!
[Tina:] It's bis, I think they mean business people!....... And she's going... she got out papers and pencil!
[Josephine:] Taking names and addresses who'll back her up!
[Ricky:] Mum,.
[Sally:] You could see through the window.
[Tina:] And the rain comes in when you open the door!
[Josephine:] Blimey! And she said... and he said, well they told didn't they? Got three bus loads, three or four bus loads of people!
[Tina:] Yes of old age pensioners coming down!
[Josephine:] She said, they hadn't! She said!...
[Sally:] And they're in
[Josephine:] We haven't had anybody have we?
[Ricky:] Mum, will daddy be here?... Why doesn't daddy come?... Granddad.
[Sally:] He'll bloody come next week. Next time.
[Ricky:] Why?
[Sally:] Cos I'll make him!
[Josephine:] We let him out.
[Sally:] [LAUGHTER] No, I've been meaning to.
[Ricky:] Come on Mark!
[Sally:] See you later!
[Josephine:] Mark'll go bananas I expect!
[Sally:] Well now how long have they known you were going to rent a caravan?
[Tina:] Well it's been booked for three or four weeks hasn't it?
[Josephine:] Ooh, more than that!
[Sally:] on the bed.
[Ricky:] I was taking a long time!
[Sally:] What?
[Tina:] They're supposed to
[Ricky:] Ha! Ha!
[Tina:] to pay people... to come and clean the caravan out at the weekend.
[Sally:] No, I mean this flue thing should of been.
[Josephine:] The caravan's been cleaned!
[Tina:] Well you says they hadn't even washed the curtains!
[Ricky:] I'll leave it till next week.
[Sally:] What?
[Ricky:] I'll leave it till next week!
[Tina:] You said they hadn't washed the curtains!
[Josephine:] They're not washing the curtains, they're putting new ones in!
[Tina:] Yes, well that's their er... stipulations and... that's... what they're supposed to do once a year!... It hasn't been done has it?...
[Josephine:] No, they're not!... Danny's paid for new curtains to go up!
[Tina:] Yes, I know! But they haven't done it!
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Josephine:] No!
[Tina:] So that's another twenty, thirty, forty, fifty pound in their pocket!
[Josephine:] No, cos they're doing it!
[Sally:] will you shut up and wait!
[Ricky:] Why?
[Sally:] That's why! was closed?
[Josephine:] Yes... yes, they're not opening till next week are they?... Next week, is it warmer?
[Ricky:] Mum...!
[Sally:] You've just had!
[Josephine:] So next time you come down... it will be open and then you'll be able to go.
[Tina:] Oh, poor dolly!
[Sally:] What can I do first?
[Josephine:] I think ours and all will be going home. Going home minute of the day! No I bloody haven't! I kept the!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] And that woman!...!
[Tina:] I went out to check the date on the and to turn the place over.
[Josephine:] Gees I was shocked!... Brand new! She owned it!... Mm, yeah she had a with her!... And I couldn't wait you see.... Well I'd have had it all on tape! Have you gotta?... Have you?... No, you'll have to get in touch.... I'll just pack things all up shall I?
[Sally:] Ha?
[Tina:] What about these!... Diamonds
[Sally:] What are they?
[Tina:] rubies, no, and pearls
[Josephine:] Emeralds are they?
[Tina:] emeralds there!
[Josephine:] Yeah, and a ruby on the other!... [LAUGHTER] You found the good bit []!
[Sally:] Mm.
[Tina:] Well wait and see what er... Mark has got to say.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] laying properly.... Aha?
[Josephine:] No.... Let Danny do it.
[Tina:] That's them gone!
[Sally:] What's?...
[Tina:] Was that them?
[Josephine:] I don't know!
[Sally:] No it wasn't.... Some
[Josephine:] Who
[Tina:] No
[Josephine:] was it?
[Tina:] .
[Josephine:] So what did she say to you when she went?
[Tina:] She said....
[Josephine:] This woman and man.
[Tina:] Oh she said we'll make enquiries she said.... She was going on about the grass they've left on the
[Ricky:] Do you think I could leave it just there?
[Tina:] But she was in a frenzy you could see that!
[Josephine:] Yeah, she was a bit! She's looking for somebody to back her up!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And that's why I cannot get involved.... But we're gonna do it and she says she hadn't as yet!... That's what she said.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] .... I don't think she said she's doing extra!... She says you'll have the bill for this!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] A man just stated it! That we're taking responsibility... we'll be moving out!... We won't get paid for it!... We wanted to charge them!
[Tina:] I don't know anything them see.... It might be that they're in under promotions team.
[Josephine:] Their only parking!... I see us having to...
[Tina:] Perhaps
[Josephine:] last year.
[Tina:] perhaps erm... perhaps they're only parking... their caravan on the....
[Josephine:] And only letting it to friends and I suggest
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] their grandson.
[Tina:] But er... somebody was in and left it all filthy and mouldy and... what for!
[Josephine:] Oh!... Yes?... Had the cleaner gone in it?
[Tina:] I don't know.
[Josephine:] I don't think so, no.
[Tina:] How?
[Josephine:] Because er, I've seen it and dirty and that.... And they're bloody cooker's filthy!... It's true!... I have seen it.... I don't think it's really clean, and they charge you for it!
[Tina:] Of course they do!... They're out to get all they can out of them!
[Josephine:] Mm.... As he says... it, it's the biggest holiday
[Tina:] And
[Josephine:] company in Britain... and he said er, they just keep under... their
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] legal limit!... He said.... You can't get them to admit that.
[Tina:] And, and they'll keep all the profits that they can!...... They're not gonna let you get away with a lot!... You know, such as new curtains!... They try to bother... them.... And I dare say, like these he said they... they've paid for their caravan, cash!... So that's close to ten thousand pounds!... And they thought it was an investment!... Where as now they find it had been better for them to have left their in the bank!... Didn't say it so many words, but that's what he meant!... And an investment on ten thousand's about twenty pound a week!... So it's a lot of money to, I would think.... Perhaps he can
[Josephine:] She said thought, she'll only only let it out about six or eight times through the year!... Well they haven't got total control over letting it!
[Tina:] .
[Josephine:] No.... Perhaps they'll go.
[Tina:] Mark is making his will... isn't he?
[Josephine:] Ah a good!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] ... Oh she's left her dolly in there!
[Tina:] Ooh God, Sally was taking her out!... Who's key are all those?
[Josephine:] Dunno,.... I dunno!
[Tina:] Oh, she's, she coming back, look, there's her book and her pencil.
[Josephine:] Mark.
[Tina:] Well Sally was right anyway.
[Josephine:] This is the caravan... here.... Sally will take it off, Mark's....... I don't know what this is.
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] I know she bought any... there's her roller skates!
[Tina:] Oh yeah.
[Josephine:] Oh well, I'm off! I know, he was going into the office! Why?
[Sally:] I can't find... he's not in there... in reception?
[Josephine:] Perhaps he's gone to shops?... I don't know which way he's gone then.
[Sally:] What's surname?
[Josephine:] ... erm... No....?... Dunno!... Perhaps you ought to look for a phoney.
[Sally:] In the phone book see if there's any there?
[Josephine:] I dunno!
[Sally:] Then we can ring them, see what happens.... When we get home then.
[Josephine:] Yes.... But what if
[Ricky:] Oh look!
[Josephine:] Silly isn't he!... What about her doll and things? I'll bring everything home if I'm going home.... Tara She said they're getting money for nothing!... Hey?
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Josephine:] Now we'll go and find mum.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] I can't remember, the man he said....
[Tina:] Keep it on
[Josephine:] Ooh!
[Tina:] enough will be used at from it.
[Josephine:] Oh! and all do you think?
[Tina:] What kind is it?... A recording?
[Josephine:] Yeah, a Walkman.... It's recording everything.... You put the headphones on and you can listen to your choir!... Which is far easier than the one you were using.
[Tina:] Mm.... Oh, you put one of them in! Well it's going round like hell, any how!
[Josephine:] Well yeah, it's taping your voice!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Oh!... Oh, I hope it heard something nice []!
[Josephine:] Yes, well they're listening [LAUGHTER] for slang []!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Oh my God! [LAUGHTER] I said to her check the phone boxes and Penny's in there phoning [] Danny and, and bloody Lorna!... Mm.
[Tina:] I re, I er... I co, heard Sally
[Josephine:] And down there
[Tina:] counting
[Josephine:] phoning them.
[Tina:] but I didn't know... who it was... and I thought, God, has Danny arrived! [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] He does sound, that woman!... Can't understand her!
[Tina:] Oh yes
[Josephine:] She's out!
[Tina:] I can!
[Josephine:] She's in piling a bloody list!
[Tina:] Yeah, I'm, I, I can't
[Josephine:] And she's got it down... where do
[Tina:] I can't
[Josephine:] you come from? Your name?
[Tina:] I thought... when I was looking at her talking... and I thought, you're a school mistress.
[Josephine:] I wouldn't say that, I'd have said..., she's a landlady.... And this is extra.
[Tina:] Oh I would have said she was a... school mistress.
[Josephine:] And her... her... bed and breakfast is
[Tina:] Was a school mistress!
[Josephine:] bed and breakfast is er... paying... keeping this caravan.
[Tina:] No, I would say that they were
[Josephine:] And it's not
[Tina:] retired and he's had a good job in his time.... And, and this was a little
[Josephine:] Well I feel he's
[Tina:] But I said to him.... No.... I said to him... er that er... it was an extra... and he said that was the object of it. Helps the pension.... You know?... He didn't say it in so many words, but
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] It was an investment, that's what I said.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] He said yes.... So I shouldn't be surprised, they're both retired... and, and er... pension.
[Josephine:] She said they've had... they've had a couple of days out here trekking, trying to catch people!
[Tina:] Their pension is... their pension and their bit of income... keeps them, and that's all sort of thing, in a little bit of luxury.
[Josephine:] He... she's looking for tenants!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] How, I... did you find it clean?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] You know, are you happy with er... arrangements then?... What did you think of cleanliness and
[Tina:] Oh well of course that
[Josephine:] And then perhaps she'll take their names and addresses!
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] And the date see, Mrs so and so was in that caravan on such and such date!... If ever it came to court!... Cos he said... somebody's got to bring them down!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And he said, we're disgusted with our caravan!
[Tina:] Yes. Well of course, that might be a private!
[Josephine:] Well that's what I would say about this... if this was new I wouldn't let people go in!
[Tina:] Theirs might be a private caravan on the site, and le, like Jackie's.... And letting it as private.... See, Jackie won't let anybody in her caravan.
[Josephine:] But she said... they've let it to people and they've just wrecked the inside of it!... Everything she said!... It's a total mess!... And it's a brand new last July we've had it, she said!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And it's filthy!
[Tina:] Mm.... And she said that everything was mouldy... in er... you know the... even the curtains were mildew!
[Josephine:] And how did she put salt round? Because this is a hell of a lot damper today... than what it was when I had the salt about you.
[Tina:] you... but er... some people
[Josephine:] Course not!
[Tina:] Yes.... Well I'd never heard of salt being put down before!
[Josephine:] But she... yes, she told me that in all, in the shop.... In the reception.... She said, put it
[Tina:] Yeah, well...
[Josephine:] down.
[Tina:] yeah, these might tell you but... I always heard that salt was damp!
[Josephine:] Yeah but it attracts the
[Tina:] The
[Josephine:] water in
[Tina:] the
[Josephine:] the air, into the salt!
[Tina:] and of course, once it's in the salt, it's steams!
[Josephine:] Well it's only now it feels like this!... It was not like this when we were down here washing it.
[Tina:] Well that's common sense when you think about it isn't it?... You put, you put a drop of water on it... you put er... a bowl of salt... and... that will go down... eventually!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] If the air is damp.
[Josephine:] It's collected the water.
[Tina:] Once that's damp, that's rising the steam!
[Josephine:] So how else do you keep it dry? She said, straight to me now!... I said that caravan is soaking wet, I said!... The mattresses!
[Tina:] mm.
[Josephine:] And she said er... well it does take time for them to dry out doesn't it, she said?... But I, there was people in it last week!... Yes I know, she said!
[Tina:] Well if she's covering
[Josephine:] I said well there's no way I
[Tina:] she is paid to cover the boss!
[Josephine:] There's no way I'd of slept in it, I said and not... I wouldn't of done it!... Let alone, old age pensioners, I said!
[Tina:] And you know... we've been to a few caravans
[Josephine:] Go in that end bedroom and feel the bed!
[Tina:] that feel a bit, caravans that we used to go to were like this chalet.... The chalets we used to go to... Mrs er... I can't remember her name now!... But her boys used to run steam roller outside middle house and I used to take them in.... She used to see... that the beds were aired.... She did see to them!... She put oil heaters... in the caravan... and she kept the... the mattresses in her bungalow!... She'd only got about eight caravans then.... And... then we went in and had a caravan... somewhere up by Aberystwyth, Ginnie and me, and you kids.
[Josephine:] That was an old farmer's caravan weren't
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] it?
[Tina:] But it wasn't too, that was too damp to sleep on!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] who won the bloody war, roof up weren't it []!
[Tina:] There wasn't, there wasn't a cup and saucer each!... Remember?
[Josephine:] Mm.... [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] And these are no better! I mean, caravans are caravans, call them what you like!... Only one saucepan we had!... And it was stew everyday if we didn't go out for dinner!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Ah!... And you
[Tina:] Remember that cup of tea?... Remember that cup of tea... cos the water gave out on us at one stage!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, we had to walk across the bloody fields for water []!... And milk.... [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Yes, friendly woman at the farm! We should have had a time, we'd of had to go home!
[Josephine:] Well who's caravan was it?
[Tina:] Oh somebody who's lived er... out [LAUGHTER] Gloucester []!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Yes I know!... [LAUGHTER]... Perhaps that's where Aunty Ginnie got her
[Tina:] But er
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] bug from []!
[Tina:] But erm
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] the... people at the farm... they were supposed to seen... you know, for her?... She made out that she was paying at the farm to... clean it.
[Josephine:] Did you tell them that in the farm.
[Tina:] Well Ginnie did!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Got her to do the dirty work for... [LAUGHTER] for free []!... Well... same when we went and found them boys in it!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Oh he's walking back home in temper now []!
[Tina:] Well it was a job to get in here [LAUGHTER] just after []!
[Josephine:] And now you're on the staff!... Oh shush here's
[Tina:] Now he
[Josephine:] somebody! No, he's got another one!... No.
[Tina:] Yeah, they got a job to get him back!... Well it's clean here is it?... People have
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Tina:] left it clean?
[Josephine:] They haven't been here! There's been nobody here!... Come and have a look!... Cos everything is, as I left it!
[Mark:] How long do I keep that for?
[Josephine:] Somebody else been here,.... This water heater is not to be used as it failed to reach the er... oh well I now! Wait, and I'll go and find out!... That's for the bed er... television and the microwave.... This... and the water heater.
[Mark:] And ask her about the water heater cos if I can't take a shower I will stink!
[Tina:] Funny way of running business any how!
[Josephine:] Look at him with the bloody roll in the window!
[Tina:] Oh.... But er, Danny says that they said that they were
[Josephine:] People had been in!
[Tina:] overflowing!... Yes I know, but he... he said people are in last week! But that's what
[Josephine:] They're overflowing with bookings for the summer!
[Tina:] Oh!... And now?
[Josephine:] Yeah, cos they could have three times as many caravans!... By June... they'd let them go!... They're overflowing with them!
[Tina:] Not now!... Of course, you see, it's you that's using the caravan this week so they can come here... they can they?
[Josephine:] No.... Somebody comes quick and wants the caravan... they're supposed to be there ready!... Oh!
[Tina:] Ooh the sun is warm!... Can you feel it?
[Josephine:] Is it the sun [LAUGHTER] or is it this... heater []?... You can just see
[Tina:] Oh I dunno, maybe
[Josephine:] the sun!
[Tina:] maybe, maybe, maybe!
[Josephine:] Oh, and he's taking Tarzan for a walk!... Is that Sally?....
[Tina:] Mm?... Who's with her?
[Josephine:] ... it's somebody else!... Right!... Go and see her!
[Tina:] I dunno.
[Josephine:] Ha?
[Tina:] I dunno.
[Josephine:] What do you think,?... Now... erm Mrs and I down the caravan park.
[speaker002:] Right.... Yeah, they were.
[Josephine:] But people were in last week!
[speaker002:] Mm. Erm,.
[Josephine:] What?... Cos I came down!... And I... cos I was amazed they told me about this salt... rubbish!... So I did it... and bowls are full of water! I was shocked!... And then, I thought well I gosh this caravan isn't... is it because the salt had gone?
[speaker002:] I... i, it could be because it feels quite cold and damp.
[Josephine:] Anyway... there's er... there's no!... There's no television in there!
[speaker002:] Right.
[Josephine:] There's... and there's a big sign on the water heater... it's not to be used!
[speaker002:] Right.....
[Josephine:] And I said we are going back home!
[speaker002:] Er... would you
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] er...
[Josephine:] Yes, and I will from the.
[speaker002:] Yeah...?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Right, I'll go and get the.
[Josephine:] And I said there's a
[Tina:] Did you tell him, as he's threatened to come home?
[Josephine:] ... down there now. She said she's trying to find it.
[Tina:] Suppose we... better go back home!
[Josephine:] Going in the shop first.
[Tina:] Why is it?... She's got no excuse!
[Josephine:] I'll go down there first.... To tell them not to mess about with that water heater!... Ohhh... She didn't know!... I said well when I was here last... that sign wasn't on the... thing then!... Don't forget!
[Tina:] And I'll put them back in... the back.
[Josephine:] Is that the door key?... Who's in the toilet?
[Ricky:] Is?
[Josephine:] He's gone in there.... I'll take those out the window.
[Ricky:] What?
[Josephine:] What? Co... they're coming down now.... Er... I said, that the sign on the washing thing washing thing... wasn't there last.... Darren put the microwave into store.... And the telly is in store, and they'll be bringing that right now. Right, what about the... what about the water heater?
[Sally:] The microwave's with.... He took the microwave!
[Josephine:] No, darling, because... it just stays there.
[Mark:] Yeah, right... what about the water heater?... That's the more important thing!
[Josephine:] She said, she didn't know but she getting somebody down here now!
[Mark:] So we still don't know whether that's gonna be operational! Because, according to B S standards
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Mark:] that should be ripped off the wall, like!
[Josephine:] Right!... Well I don't know because they've put new flues and everything on these fires.... I don't know! And she's getting somebody down now!
[Mark:] Oh.
[Josephine:] So I haven't been to the shop yet.
[Mark:] Oh!... As long as they come down in the next twenty minutes!... Otherwise I'll go up there!
[Tina:] It was alright last season!
[Josephine:] Yeah!... She doesn't understand it herself! I said... we were here... doing the caravan, it wasn't there then!... Somebody's been in!... Somebody did, they was... there was two people in here... last week!
[Sally:] What to... rented it?
[Josephine:] Yeah.... Two old age pensioners.
[Sally:] They're supposed to be...!
[Tina:] In the end,!
[Sally:] What, so these two people have been in here, staying here, no television, no microwave?
[Josephine:] Yeah!... Two old age pensioners!
[Mark:] Are they ripping them off then?... The old age pensioners are paying for a caravan... including these, you know, facilities, and the people don't get them!
[Josephine:] I don't know! But that's what she told me!
[Sally:] I'll see about mic, microwave in the house.
[Josephine:] No, it isn't!
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Josephine:] , what's on the bloody thing there? The bur, the blue thing?... Can you read it from the inside?... I'll go outside
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Josephine:] and see it.
[Mark:] Yeah.... Water heater flue tested, failed!... Well that's a big job!
[Ricky:] Mummy!
[Josephine:] Well it's up to them put it right!
[Ricky:] Mummy!
[Mark:] Yeah but what I'm saying is... that's my week up the spout like, innit?
[Ricky:] Mummy!... Er... well how much
[Mark:] Oh by the way, Sally's got the shopping.
[Ricky:] be here?
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... [LAUGHTER] Oh we'll wonder shall we []!
[Sally:] Oh well come round and tell us!
[Mark:] They... they should have been, they, if they failed
[Sally:] Come on!
[Mark:] it, they should have reported it to you!... That's what
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Sally:] Only getting cold water!....
[Mark:] See.
[Josephine:] I can't do any more than that!
[Mark:] I'm not taking it out on you! I'll take it out on them! I just burnt twenty quid on food and if I stay here to eat it... I'll take it out on them!... You, you're paying you're paying us
[Ricky:] Ooh look at that!
[Mark:] a lot of money
[Ricky:] Ooh!
[Mark:] for them to give you this kind of service!
[Sally:] Your mirror's not back either!
[Josephine:] No!
[Ricky:] A man stole it!... A man called Mark!
[Mark:] No!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Sally:] Have you tried lighting that boiler then?
[Josephine:] No.... light it! What if it blows?... And I'll touch it later when... let them do it!
[Mark:] [sighing] Ha []!
[Josephine:] Ah?... That lights working. She said it's electric and gas. I said, yes, we've lit the fire in the bedroom!
[Mark:] Course it's electric, you put the fridge on before!
[Josephine:] And I said I put the fridge on. bulbs are.... And I said when we went in, I went in to show Mark now, but I said I can, you can do it myself. I was going in... I was gonna ask somebody to come down and show us how to light the boiler.... And I said there's a big blue sign across it, not to use it!... Do not use!... I said to her, that!
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Josephine:] I said well it's there, I said! And we haven't touched the!
[Ricky:] Mummy,, watch me!... Not very soft!...!... I better show off them big!... Do!
[Josephine:] Still wobbly innit?
[Ricky:] We'll... we'll lend you... which says only.
[Sally:] It's... Do you think they'll be long?
[Josephine:] Not long, why?
[Ricky:] Why is the man going to come here?
[Sally:] It's in the car!....
[Mark:] In the car.
[Ricky:] Go on then!... Come back here!
[Mark:] But then I wished they were a bit later!
[Ricky:] Come out here!... Go on!... Go and!... I'll hide from.
[Sally:] Mm.
[Ricky:] Shall I?
[Sally:] Quick!... Yes, go and hide!
[Ricky:] Why?
[Mark:] I'll start.... We're going to bloody
[Josephine:] The night
[Mark:] bad week... a, a week's in
[Josephine:] Darren... put the microwave into store!...!
[Mark:] Why didn't he leave it alone,?
[Josephine:] Switched off.... That's it!
[Sally:] And you've got it at home really.
[Josephine:] It was in store!
[Sally:] You've got it at home!
[Josephine:] So it's at home?... Put it in store, so he's finding another!... Right!
[Sally:] Said he
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Sally:] the water now!
[Mark:] For Christ's sake!
[Ricky:] Mum!... Have you thought about
[Sally:] Why?
[Ricky:] going to that fair yet?
[Sally:] No, cos we
[Mark:] So you're basically So what you're saying is you're
[Josephine:] No... it doesn't matter!
[Mark:] Oh God!
[Josephine:] I'm gonna fetch my mother in!
[Mark:] For God's sake!
[Josephine:] Right!
[Ricky:] Right!...!
[Josephine:] Are you coming to sit in?... I don't know where, when they'll come!
[Tina:] So you've got to wait?
[Josephine:] We'll have to!... We'll have to get your bags all in there... if we're not stopping, we can't stop!... There's a great big thing on the front go home!....... Leave your bag in the car mum.
[Tina:] Oh!... We'll have to stay here.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] There's nobody at the house.
[Josephine:] ....
[Tina:] Course you can!
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] What's all this?
[Josephine:] ...
[Tina:] ... but now they've put it....
[Josephine:] All in there.... Plenty of room for the chair.
[Tina:] Mm?... Room was just alright for the.... They knew you were working yesterday!... What is?
[Ricky:] on there.... are my.
[Tina:] Ooh!
[Ricky:] Look at me! Look at me!... I'm in here!
[Tina:] Alright.
[Ricky:] I'm gonna get the bed!
[Tina:] Oh crafty!
[Sally:] Mind your fingers!
[Ricky:] ....
[Josephine:] Well I shall make the beds anyway.
[Sally:] ... Has anyone not got a map here?
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Sally:] Is it up there?
[Tina:] I don't know!
[Josephine:] Why don't you?
[Mark:] Now, who got the cigarettes?
[Tina:] Oh, some of them are outside, yes.
[Mark:] And in ten minutes if they ain't down here, I'm going back up there!
[Tina:] What you going back up there for?
[Mark:] To get them to remember you.... I'll walk up there and he'll be coming back down, he'll give me a lift back down.... This is the bit where mama says I'm just like Susan, I'll have a go at it, I'll demand it!
[Sally:] Susan says she does it, but she doesn't really do it!
[Mark:] Yeah well, where as I will then!
[Josephine:] Ah... shut up for half an hour now will you?... Erm
[Mark:] Half an hour! Half an hour!
[Tina:] The er... the gas stoves doesn't!
[Josephine:] The gas is on!
[Tina:] Oh, it's on?... Oh I can see now, yes!
[Josephine:] But without that heater they've got no hot water, no nothing!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Have they?... So how could they let it out to
[Tina:] Yeah, that's what Paul said!
[Josephine:] Old age pensioners?... But it wasn't here!... It wasn't on then!
[Tina:] No, I've er, I, I, think it happened since.... And you see er... it's one of those things that can wait.
[Josephine:] But all were these were ta er... all these were tested.... Well Dave's done it!... Before we came down here to clean the caravan.... Cos the man said to me, look you've got a new flue on!... And that one over there has as well!
[Mark:] Well that fail sign... wasn't on the caravan... when we was doing that axle... underneath.
[Sally:] No, because
[Mark:] They were saying what
[Josephine:] The blue one was on... saying it had been tested!
[Mark:] That's not to say it failed!
[Josephine:] No.
[Ricky:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Well I come down the week after that.... There's a on then!
[Tina:] Children to sit on! Look!
[Ricky:] I don't!
[Sally:] Here they are then!
[Tina:] I don't why it's for children
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Tina:] to sit on it!
[Ricky:] Not or potatoes.
[Josephine:] Those pretty earrings you got!
[Tina:] Where did you get those from?
[Ricky:] [whispering] Susan gave them to me [].
[Tina:] Susan did!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Oh!... Well come and let me look at them.
[Josephine:] look at your new jumper now.
[Tina:] Well don't pull them!... Oh they are pretty aren't they! Little flowers!... Makes you a little clown doesn't it?
[Ricky:] No, you're a little clown!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]...... Ha!
[Josephine:] Has anybody
[Tina:] Hello darling! Little darling!
[Ricky:] I'm not
[Sally:] Ha?
[Ricky:] a dog like you are!
[Tina:] Perhaps he's working.
[Sally:] [whispering] Could just have forgotten []!
[Ricky:] Who's that?
[Mark:] What's what?
[Sally:] God knows!
[Mark:] Ha! Ha! Ha! [whistling]
[Josephine:] Sally you're windows, I can't open!... Here comes.... What? Inside?
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Oh well!... I nearly trod on your fingers then didn't I?... Did I? Mm mm mm.
[Tina:] Yeah... I thought I'd seen cloud on top on the hills.
[Ricky:] That's what you think!
[Sally:] Maybe!
[Ricky:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Oh I don't think, they only had the telly.
[Josephine:] Oh dear! Let her bloody, it's not cold! I know cold!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... Ooh look at dolly's knickers!... Just look at those!
[Josephine:] Ooh!
[Sally:] When they come down then... do we or what?
[Josephine:] And then!
[Tina:] Ooh I told
[Sally:] Got a tow truck?
[Tina:] I've counted about seventeen to... twenty caravans.... And there was er
[Josephine:] Oh you haven't been your wearing your glasses!
[Tina:] !... There was erm
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] six people.... Er two... two of them
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] five adults and a little one... a baby one... went
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] along there
[Ricky:] Shall I sit on here?
[Tina:] and the caravan next... the one opposite the shop
[Ricky:] Just sit here then.
[Tina:] or the business
[Sally:] go to your room.
[Tina:] caravan next door
[Ricky:] Do I have to go to sleep?
[Tina:] and those people got out a and I've seen.... So there are a few
[Ricky:] We're not going to be here tonight!
[Tina:] in the, in the.
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Ricky:] Can we... are we going to?
[Sally:] I don't know! See what time we've got left!
[Ricky:] ...... This is what I do to my teddy... just hold her by her leg... nice teddy, look!
[Tina:] You're dolly!... Ooh!
[Sally:] Ooh!!
[Tina:] Oh!... Have to get another sober!
[Sally:] .
[Josephine:] A bird on the roof!... Walking about.
[Ricky:] Can we walk... to grandma? I don't want to!
[Sally:] Well you just play there!
[Ricky:] In his Yes... and there's a bird on the roof and he was trying get up there to see his mummy!
[Sally:] Yeah!
[Josephine:] Here he comes!...
[Ricky:] What?
[Sally:] Good luck!
[Ricky:] ?
[Sally:] Mm.
[Ricky:] Mhm.... Sorry!
[Josephine:] .
[Sally:] Where does this mattress belong?
[Josephine:] Off this bed in here.
[Ricky:] Mum!...?
[Sally:] Can you hold on!
[Ricky:] What's that?
[Josephine:] Playing on the roof again.
[Ricky:] .... Perhaps he's flying down the chimney.... I saw something!... At the door!... It's open then is it? And again!
[Sally:] Help!
[Josephine:] He should do!
[Sally:] [singing] Mm mm mm, mm mm [].
[Ricky:] Do you know what, we haven't played any games?
[Josephine:] Haven't played the what?
[Sally:] No, she wants to go up to that playgroup!
[Josephine:] After!... Later!
[Ricky:] Later?
[Sally:] Later, we're going home!... Have to get ready for work!... [whispering] We shall have to... go up there []
[Ricky:] Not today!
[Sally:] [whispering] We will [].
[Ricky:] Can we have another?... Gotta go work mum!...
[Sally:] Come on mum, be the host! Make a cup of coffee! We're all dying of thirst!
[Tina:] Oh that's an idea!
[Danny:] Maybe we'll do two at a time.
[Tina:] Never thought about that!
[Ricky:] Shall we go see that thing, pool where you play in?... In between, it's got yellow flags.
[Danny:] I'll just get.
[Sally:] Later!
[Ricky:] But, we're going home later!
[Josephine:] Yeah, we have, I've gotta wait for the man to come!
[Ricky:] Why?
[Josephine:] I know, no hot water!
[Ricky:] Oh, no hot water!
[Tina:] You won't be able to wash your face!
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Sally:] Mm?
[Danny:] [whistling]
[Ricky:] When I went into the can we play?... Please?... Please mummy!
[Tina:] Do you know she's a little
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Tina:] bit, ain't she?
[Ricky:] What?
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] That cardigan isn't too long for her!
[Ricky:] Can I
[Josephine:] No.
[Ricky:] mum?
[Sally:] [LAUGHTER]
[Ricky:] Mum, can I?... Can I?
[Josephine:] then going to the shop.
[Danny:] Don't... why?... Oh, I've gotta go to reception first.
[Ricky:] Go to the shop.... Where you going?
[Josephine:] Are you going We're collecting now, wait!
[Sally:] What do you want from the shop?... Do you want some.
[Danny:] Some.
[Josephine:] Did you get one?
[Sally:] Yes.
[Tina:] Where's her shoes?
[Ricky:] Take me!
[Josephine:] So you're going up?
[Sally:] Well, not yet. I'll wait and see what happens!
[Josephine:] Well you can come back and I'll tell you what happens!
[Danny:] I'm going up to reception.
[Josephine:] So as I can take her for a ride and back.
[Ricky:] I don't want to go for a ride! I want to go that...!
[Tina:] Oh, that isn't until next Monday dear!... Monday or Tuesday.... And it's Saturday today. Now then... Saturday
[Ricky:] No, it's the one with the slide!
[Tina:] Yeah, well it isn't open until Monday or Tuesday.... So it's Saturday today
[Ricky:] Can we go and have a look in case she's wrong?... Can we?
[Tina:] I'll pop you out in the bag [LAUGHTER] in a minute []!
[Ricky:] Can we?... Why nanny!
[Josephine:] I don't know! I've got to wait for the man!
[Ricky:] Okay.... Mummy will.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!... Pull yourself together Sal!
[Sally:] Ha!
[Ricky:] I can come with you then.
[Josephine:] nappy!
[Ricky:] Why, why does the man wanna come?
[Tina:] Mind you don't fall!
[Ricky:] Why does wanna come?
[Josephine:] Just seeing why the water... heater isn't working!
[Ricky:] It is working!
[Josephine:] It isn't working!
[Ricky:] Which heater?
[Josephine:] In the bathroom!
[Tina:] It won't get hot! The water doesn't get hot! And it should when you have a bath... shouldn't it?
[Ricky:] Mm.... Do you know what? When... when the have
[Josephine:] Once upon a time!
[Sally:] Get off!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Ricky:] When
[Sally:] Come and get and get your skates in the car!
[Ricky:] Why?
[Sally:] Cos we will... have to go in the car.
[Tina:] Oh have you got your skates?
[Ricky:] Mum!... I want to go down see it.
[Sally:] We'll see that in a minute.
[Ricky:] Okay.
[Tina:] Gonna bring your bike down there?....
[Sally:] Stop it!
[Ricky:] We go and.
[Tina:] She even said it was quiet!
[Josephine:] I know, there's no crowd about!
[Tina:] Yeah!... Well
[Josephine:] Now's the time to learn innit?
[Sally:] You've gotta put
[Josephine:] Put a size of a on it!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Ricky:] Mummy, I want to go!
[Sally:] Well you've gotta put your wellies on and
[Josephine:] You gotta put your shoes on!
[Ricky:] Ha?
[Josephine:] Put your shoes on, quick!
[Sally:] Have to put your roller skates in the car.
[Josephine:] Outside. Your shoes!... Not inside! Get them on!
[Ricky:] Why?
[Tina:] Well, no why's about it!... Get them on!
[Ricky:] No!
[Josephine:] Yes!
[Ricky:] No!
[Tina:] Right this very minute!
[Ricky:] Wow you
[Tina:] Else I shall say ding dang on your bum!
[Ricky:] You can't make me!... cos... cos you're not gonna I'll give you a smack bum!... Urgh... You still got!... Here mum!... Mum!... Mama ma
[Sally:] Yes alright dear.
[Tina:] You've gotta have it done! [whistling]
[Josephine:] They're your snow boots aren't they?
[Ricky:] I just go
[Sally:] Come on then!
[Ricky:] I will!
[Josephine:] Are they snow boots?
[Ricky:] No, they're
[Sally:] Mountain climbing boots.
[Josephine:] Mountain climbers! Oh weh
[Sally:] climbed up on.... Do you want your coat on?
[Tina:] Did they know... that they we, these were coming down?
[Josephine:] Yeah!... And Mark, definite cos it's on the papers, it's on the books! We asked them.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] That's why ask what time of year!... This is, God, a bloody afternoon wasted! Damn thing's gonna be a bloody pest!... It will go!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... How much a week rent... do you pay for ground?
[Josephine:] No, it all comes out at the end of the summer, see.
[Tina:] Yeah, but d er, do they tell you... how much they take out?
[Josephine:] Yeah.... It's all laid out.... [singing] Ha QQ ho ha [].... Are the at the back any different is it?
[Tina:] Yeah.... But er, I think that the... the tiles a bit near the woodwork.
[Josephine:] Mhm.... Look at her, going on down the road! [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Oh she's got her bike.
[Josephine:] Roller skates.... Oh!
[Tina:] [sneeze]
[Josephine:] She'll never get her to go like that cos her legs are too stiff!
[Tina:] Oh, she like.
[Josephine:] Making harder work!
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] Making harder work for herself!
[Tina:] Mm mm!
[Josephine:] She's come off!... They're walking.
[Tina:] Hark at the wind coming in through the
[Josephine:] Fire, the vent.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] No.
[speaker002:] Sorry to trouble you, do you own the caravan I'm renting?
[Josephine:] I own them.
[speaker002:] You own it? Oh!... erm... we own a caravan. Could you tell me have you been very happy with the... services?... How everything works out, the parking charge
[Josephine:] Come in.
[speaker002:] and... that?....
[Josephine:] Well... come in!
[speaker002:] Thank you.
[Josephine:] I don't really know much about this cos my son does it all.
[speaker002:] Oh I see!
[Josephine:] Hiya
[Sally:] Hello!... I'm cold!
[speaker002:] You know... Nice way to get warm!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[speaker002:] .
[Josephine:] Erm... I don't really know much about it this is our first spring, you see?
[Danny:] There's all grass on there!
[speaker002:] Is it?... So this a new I'm afraid I brought that in!
[Danny:] Did you?
[speaker002:] Yes, it's off my feet! We've been ploughing all over the grass! I'd better stand
[Danny:] God!
[speaker002:] out there really!
[Danny:] You stand out there then!
[speaker002:] I don't want to walk all over your carpet!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] [LAUGHTER]
[Danny:] There's a there
[speaker002:] Yes.
[Danny:] and stand right on it!
[speaker002:] Erm
[Josephine:] Get tho... get those stools out.
[speaker002:] Is it a new
[Danny:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] one then?... Yeah, I mean
[Josephine:] Not brand new!... It was new to us!
[speaker002:] Was it?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] So this is your, really your first year is it?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] And, are you going to let it out?
[Josephine:] No.
[speaker002:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Why?
[speaker002:] Well, we bought a caravan last year... actually at the end of May
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Yes.
[speaker002:] And erm
[Danny:] Move out the way!
[speaker002:] we... it... we don't think it was let out very often.... That was through to the end of September.... When we came up to see it... well... it was a brand spanking new
[Danny:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] we nearly cried!... It was in such a state!
[Danny:] Only had it for a few months.
[speaker002:] Upholstery, carpets... the bath... the toilet... the cooker, the fridge... the whole lot was filthy!... And when we think that we saw it when it was new!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] And I went storming down to the office, didn't I? And I said renting it, because it must of been occupied by animals!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[speaker002:] It was disgusting!
[Tina:] Animals and.
[Josephine:] Ah know
[speaker002:] Well
[Josephine:] we've stated
[speaker002:] Yeah.... It doesn't matter what you state, cos we had heard... from other pe, I've been doing this, I've been up here last weekend... cos I am so angry about all this!
[Tina:] Well we've had a little
[speaker002:] It's just a joke!
[Tina:] problem now!... That's why we're here.
[speaker002:] Really?
[Danny:] Ah!
[Tina:] Er... there are so many... with nothing
[Josephine:] Well we came
[Tina:] to do with these....
[Josephine:] We came down... my son came down here... month... and he... and er, put red lead all underneath it. You know the?... Following Sunday I came down to wash it and polish it... and now we've got blue stickers in the bathroom... the heater!
[Danny:] We had a message
[Josephine:] And the
[Danny:] through
[Tina:] And the boys come down for a week!
[Josephine:] And they know it!
[speaker002:] How many
[Tina:] Here
[speaker002:] did they do?
[Tina:] Here he is... coming back!... Be careful, the door opens outwards!
[speaker002:] We erm... we had a letter through but it was to test the boilers, because.
[Josephine:] So we did and we've
[speaker002:] Yes.
[Josephine:] heard no more about it!
[speaker002:] Ah well... I... got a thing tested on ours... thought ours was alright. I hope so!
[Josephine:] Well there's a great On the Sunday we were here
[speaker002:] Oh was it?
[Josephine:] that blue thing was on the window!
[speaker002:] That's to say water?
[Josephine:] But now it's got red across it, failed!... And that wasn't there.
[speaker002:] And you've got to pay more money to make sure it's put right!
[Josephine:] I don't know!
[speaker002:] Yeah you do!
[Danny:] There are!
[Josephine:] Didn't know anything about it!
[speaker002:] You do! They tell you that!
[Danny:] The whole thing is just
[Tina:] There are no rules.
[speaker002:] This is... this.... See, ours was nineteen ninety one because it
[Danny:] You're joking!
[Josephine:] was er... absolutely
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Josephine:] Three years, or two years, I dunno!
[speaker002:] Ah well cos I think the newer one will be... this is some government thing to do with the gas. I mean with fitting the
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] flue.... So we had all that consequently!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[speaker002:] And erm
[Ricky:] Hey!
[speaker002:] some of them of failed, and if they fail you have to pay so much. You have to pay so much anyway to have it changed.... But, as I say, we've been very unhappy about it! We had erm... notes through about... Out of
[Ricky:] [cough]
[speaker002:] ten pillows, seven needed replacing and we needed a new milk saucepan, a new frying pan, a new ashtray
[Josephine:] Mm!
[speaker002:] cleaners etcetera!... So, I replaced most of them myself and then whenever we came down... course we complained about the cleaning!...
[Ricky:] [cough]
[speaker002:] When we came down... well... it was still... less that desirable!
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Danny:] It's terrible!
[speaker002:] And erm
[Danny:] The cooker was filthy!
[speaker002:] Yeah!
[Danny:] The fridge had mould in it!
[Tina:] All what?
[Danny:] I mean we're talking about
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Danny:] a thing that's been used for a couple of months!
[Sally:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Then he came in... er... sort of... right at the end said, well look, I'm so cheesed off with you lot
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Danny:] can't we do anything about it? She said, look... let me know, how much it's going to cost me to get rid of this, because I've had enough!... And we've only just bought it!
[Sally:] Well
[Danny:] So er
[Sally:] June, last year.
[Danny:] June, yes.... And so er
[Sally:] He came back
[Danny:] then erm
[Sally:] I think you can understand! Is this your
[Danny:] so, they won't give us
[speaker002:] caravan?
[Josephine:] No.
[Danny:] They won't quote any
[speaker002:] Oh!
[Danny:] price!... They quote anything!... So you find you're, you're on your own!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] And erm... you know, if we pay up
[speaker002:] Everything is
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Danny:] it's cost a fortune to actually the caravan sited... pay out six thousand quid right?... And then, you have to let it out then.... Through them... they have to have first option.
[Tina:] They're the one that gets the benefit!
[Josephine:] Well... two weeks ago
[speaker002:] But then they can't sell it!... They can't sell it! And that's only the new one!
[Danny:] Cos they said, I won't be able sell it cos they... they've got so many new ones on the site!
[Josephine:] Last week there was people in here!... So how could that water be like it is? Cos you can't use it!... There is no hot water!
[Ricky:] Well he can't!
[speaker002:] Well everything... everything is in their favour.... And I've... well the people, all the people I've spoken to... and everybody I've spoken to... is very unhappy!... I haven't spoken to one who's satisfied yet!... I've been on the telephone to people! I'm taking numbers off of caravans where they're letting... and I've been round and spoken to people who are in them caravans, and not one is happy!... Last week a chap down here, David
[Danny:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Told me, he said, well... ninety five per cent are happy.... I said, really? Well I haven't found one yet!... Out
[Tina:] Yes.
[speaker002:] of all the people I've spoken to!
[Tina:] What did they say now?
[speaker002:] They're all very unhappy!
[Josephine:] I tell you!
[Danny:] This woman doesn't know anything, like!... She just said there's two boys out on there on site... and the one, the, the ginger haired boy knows the... you know... the problem.... And I
[Ricky:] Mum!
[Danny:] said, well look I said, I don't wanna know
[Sally:] Hold on!
[Danny:] that! I said, is this he, water heater gonna be? I don't know!... I, oh it's alright, she said it's in the bathroom?
[Ricky:] [cough]
[Danny:] I said yeah.... She said well... he knows about it, it's all in hand!... Well
[Josephine:] Well I
[Danny:] that's no good to me, like!
[speaker002:] No!
[Josephine:] No it's He said he'd be one of the first. He's putting the flues on and he hasn't come down to check it so if he's down here I'm gonna bloody tell him....
[Tina:] pipes like that
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] And still they've condemned it.... Yes, it's surely their van.... And other flues all down along there.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] All on the grass see? It's coming out of here.... This bloke, he said. One of them goes round putting the chimneys on and the other checks the flue.
[Tina:] Oh....
[Josephine:] So I'll tell him that the fire will be on.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] There's some in the van there.
[Tina:] They're pretty good ones aren't they?
[Josephine:] Having their dinner. Yeah.
[Tina:] That looks nice....
[Josephine:] Perhaps they've been in and done it now.... [LAUGHTER]... bloody thing.
[Tina:] Well the one door is empty and
[Josephine:] And the first booking for the caravan, she just said it again. I've got it on my tape... is th the twenty first of March.
[Tina:] When the first comes in?
[Josephine:] When the first comes in.... On the twenty first of March....
[Tina:] And Danny said the third.
[Josephine:] Third did he? the first which was the Sunday and he had to get it ready because they were coming in on the Tuesday, on the third. That's why there was such a mad panic to get it done... on the Sunday the last day before... So why are the mattresses back there getting bloody damp?... Oh I forgot to give him them.... Mark isn't coming over to pick the car up. He doesn't want to. He's enjoying his break.
[Tina:] Oh he's... He's alright a couple of days and... getting old I think.
[Josephine:] Mark loves it. Loves being on his own.
[Tina:] Ah but he don't get the chance does he?...... Although I like being by myself.... But then I... different age isn't it, to?
[Josephine:] What the bloody hell is that? Montrose twenty eight. R twelve....
[Tina:] Well it's the key of somebody's cottage
[Josephine:] It's the key of somebody's caravan but it's not ours.
[Tina:] Perhaps it's the one he's got....
[Josephine:] I'll go and try these in the door now cos this is ours.
[Tina:] the door. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Look at that old thing squat on the roof....
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] It is. But they've got the bloody labels mixed up by the look of it....
[Tina:] Try them both....
[Josephine:] Yeah I'm gonna try the both. That is it. Well what the hell is that? Montrose, twenty eight. R twelve and that one's J twelve....
[Tina:] Oh, well what's the other one?
[Josephine:] this is....
[Tina:] Oh well anyway it's a code name, it's no business of yours. But what number's on the other one?
[Josephine:] one.
[Tina:] what? This is the owner's set, a Mr....
[Josephine:] Well who's are these?
[Tina:] Well you'd better see Mark first and... and let them have them back.
[Josephine:] Mark. It's nothing, these aren't nothing to do with Mark.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] They belong in the.......
[Tina:] ... It smells musty in here.
[Josephine:] Yes. This is a caravan smell and Mrs 's clothes used to stink by it.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Oh I don't believe this! [LAUGHTER] Couldn't be bothered to shop. [LAUGHTER]... I'll give them all to Mark. And then I'll go up the shop and get some, I'll need a couple of boxes.... Where's the microwave?... Ooh god....
[Tina:] gas on or should we turn the lights on so we can get the
[Josephine:] No paper. I've gotta have er paper to leave messages.... I was gonna ask Mark for a pen....
[Tina:] I've got a pen and I've got paper.
[Josephine:] A big... note.... So that I can say the fire's burning.
[Tina:] Mm.... Well you can call by and tell him that....
[Josephine:] Yeah but I want it for the men that's going to alter the gas.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] For signs.... I'm gonna put one in there... one on the kitchen
[Tina:] You'll have to buy a paper pad [LAUGHTER] that's all [].
[Josephine:] and one by the fire.... Yeah.... Then all the doors... should be open see....
[Tina:] They are damp but they don't feel too bad No.
[Josephine:] See if they leave the doors open it's not too bad.... Oh well....
[Tina:] coat hanger on the floor....
[Josephine:] Feel this and feel those beds in there....
[Tina:] But I mean this is a... er er er
[Josephine:] His home.
[Tina:] Yes but it's a... a cold room
[Josephine:] No that's wet.... Yes it's wet....
[Tina:] Well these were too weren't they? And he's stuck them by the fire.
[Josephine:] Yeah them all. Well I'm just gonna get the paper and that's it.
[Tina:] Costing a bloody fortune.
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Tina:] To light the fire.... goes out and
[Josephine:] Yeah....
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] any toilet paper. [LAUGHTER]... [singing] []... No paper or... Haven't got pens there. No pens.... No tissues.... Any tissues?
[Tina:] No....
[Josephine:] Erm...
[Tina:] How many pieces of paper do you want? Too hard. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Let's go down the toilet, see if it's open.... No wait a minute. No wait a minute.... disconnected the gas, took that bloody old heater off, connected it up somewhere else and whatever they're gonna do... and then... the gas is coming through a fire....
[Tina:] Well Mark is there.... We can pop across and see. He's not gonna go... round the caravan and... try each bed out is he?... He said he was going to... and see that it was done
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] things were done well that's a matter of....
[Josephine:] Oh it'd be better for him to put that fire on at night time... and go over in the morning and switch it off....
[Tina:] Well be at work before he can be out of bed probably, in the morning.
[Josephine:] Have to. And if he's gonna walk to Tenby they could be starting when he's in Tenby.
[Tina:] Well Sally will be there....
[Josephine:] Well Sally'll go with him.... Yeah?
[Tina:] I mean if, if he forgets Sally could remind him.... Two of them....
[Josephine:] If those men wasn't going there I would say right, put the gas fire on. Put it on low and leave it the night and day cos it was left on for a week once wasn't it?
[Tina:] Mm.... Oh god that was, that was at er... the flat. Left on for a fortnight.... Oh and it was a cold day. But it was in... August or the end of September or someth er er the beginning of September... and it was a chilly day but it was still summer.... It wasn't, you know, it wasn't terribly cold.... But we went home and I remember going in the room, I opened the door and... oh it's lovely and warm in here! So I stood by the door... I wait till dad come in cos he was the last out... and it was always my fault like, I would have left the fire on not him. So I stood by the door and I never moved till he went in... [LAUGHTER] oh he said... But with a caravan I don't know. Mm they're not very powerful grates are they?
[Josephine:] Dunno... Oh nan he says, get Mark
[Tina:] Is, is yours a heater?
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] Is yours a a long and...
[Josephine:] Well you either put one bar on... or the lot is on... or it's very dim like this is low and you can't see it at all.
[Tina:] There's no heat from it. You want something that gives heat
[Josephine:] There is heat. But you can't see it.
[Tina:] Oh. But you want to air them beds, you want to dry them beds.... I mean you've got to have heat there....
[Josephine:] Well Danny says get Mark and bung them in the bloody car and bring it home....
[Tina:] the best thing... you want to stick it in the room and put a... heater....
[Josephine:] Well we could put it in the spare bedroom. Put it up against the radiator.
[Tina:] Mm.... But if someone's going there next week, that's... two beds, three beds.... You could put them in the sitting room.... And put the heater on there, put the fire on there....
[Josephine:] Mm.... Well I dunno....
[Tina:] I do like this....... I'm afraid I
[Josephine:] You don't have to. Have a drink and it disappears.... Oh I dunno...
[Tina:] And there isn't the flavour in it that used to be....
[Josephine:] And this is Marks and Spencers?
[Tina:] Mm.... There's a... you know they used to put... I suppose vanilla essence or some of these... no almond would it be?
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] I don't know.... There used to be a lot more taste on it though than there is on that one anyway.... Well if he's going down there tomorrow why can't he bring them back?...
[Josephine:] Well I suppose he could....
[Tina:] I have to say it would help him.... I suppose they're... I suppose they're worrying him? They want something done about it.
[Josephine:] Well I wouldn't bloody. No way....
[Tina:] That thing on top of that mattress, the thing that doesn't fit... who's is that?... Oh theirs....
[Josephine:] Dunno. Belongs to the caravan
[Tina:] Yeah. Well that's what I mean, belongs to the caravan.... Why was it stuck on the bed?...
[Josephine:] Because that is the mattress for the bed that folds away in the sitting room.... Right?
[Tina:] But it seems to me to be a foam thing.
[Josephine:] It is.
[Tina:] And it's covered in a, in a... po polythene would you say?... Plastic... or what it is covered?
[Josephine:] Cloth....
[Tina:] Cos you couldn't put that by the fire....
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] It would melt.
[Josephine:] It's a cloth cover on it.
[Tina:] But I bet it's plastic inside it. It's like these cushions isn't it?
[Josephine:] It's foam. Yes.
[Tina:] Foam. But why was it so damp and cold here then?...
[Josephine:] Because it's wet and it's damp.
[Tina:] Well plastic doesn't hold the damp.
[Josephine:] It isn't plastic, it's foam!
[Tina:] Well the foam, it doesn't
[Josephine:] Oh god, yes....
[Tina:] Well you couldn't put them in the car could you?
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] The mattresses.
[Josephine:] Mm? Well I've put the big one in but I know that the rest wouldn't go in.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] But then the little bedroom wasn't so... didn't seem so damp.
[Tina:] But you didn't try it did you, really?... In that caravan... a caravan's a caravan, call it what you like... but in that caravan that Mark is in... there was that little... room where the w hot water heater is
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] and there was a hole er on the floor over there with a grating on it that was... you could see through to the ground.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Well if... through the winter months... when there's no fire in there, no nothing in there... the damp is bound to be coming through there.
[Josephine:] Fog gets in. Course it does.... All caravans are like that.... But you've got to have those caravan, those vents because the van is so small and you've got gas supplied.... It's rules and regulations.... If you've got a gas fire in
[Tina:] It it means that they haven't been doing their duty in the winter then. If they guarantee to put the mattresses all up... in the dry... they asked you to do yours... or did they say they would do it?
[Josephine:] They done it.
[Tina:] Well how's the damn thing on the bed then?
[Josephine:] Because they put it back there for these people... that was coming in.
[Tina:] Oh.... They didn't seemingly. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] We don't know.... Do we?
[Tina:] No. Well there were no there anyway. So they say. It's all hearsay.
[Josephine:] Well alright. Perhaps the man was working part-time. Perhaps he never noticed the.... Perhaps the people were in the van... and found the beds wet and said well we can't sleep here and they slept in the sit... with the fire on.... I dunno. It could have been. cos there was only two here.
[Tina:] cold weather in any case.
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Tina:] It's cold weather in any case.
[Josephine:] That's right. Shut the lights. You don't know.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] So you can't swear to that then.
[Tina:] No. That, that they weren't there.
[Josephine:] You can't, no. And then again alright, the fire was condemned on the sixth. Well those people were only there from Tuesday to Friday. And the sixth was a Friday. So it could have been condemned as they were going....
[Tina:] Oh. I don't know.
[Josephine:] Neither have I. That's why I
[Tina:] But er anyway if Danny's, if if Mark is there now... he can bring one home today and then he can bring the others tomorrow. Er it's only the two little ones. If there are two little ones there....
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] If there are two little ones there. If they're big enough for... for Susan's two boys. And and one for
[Josephine:] Well their girls have gotta sleep in them.
[Tina:] Mm. Er it's only one big one and two little ones.
[Josephine:] Well then you might as well push that little thing in as well mightn't you?
[Tina:] Oh yes.... And bring them home.
[Josephine:] But Mark won't be there when you take them back....
[Tina:] Well he says he's going to the, he said he was going to the on Friday and they would be... finished by Friday. And he was going to see that it was finished by Friday.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Well you could take them back on Friday.
[Josephine:] Mhm yeah, I could take them back Friday. How am I gonna get them in the van?...
[Tina:] What van?
[Josephine:] In, back into the caravan. On me own.
[Tina:] Oh....
[Josephine:] It's a double mattress, a double bedded mattress. I can't bloody lift that.... So the only thing that I would suggest is to
[Tina:] Well still Mark will be... there. Or he could come down with you on Saturday?... Or Sally maybe would be able to come down with you Saturday and help you?...
[Josephine:] Unless we went over the same day that Susan went over. And kept the mattresses till Susan goes.... But the understanding is... that like Mark has got the caravan this week.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] But if they had a booking to go into it, Mark's gotta get out....
[Tina:] Oh well he could ring you up and you could take them back down but at least they would be dried.... Cos if anybody... who could they come on if they caught cold and and
[Josephine:] Well I dunno.
[Tina:] You or him?
[Josephine:] I dunno.... It's like fighting a losing battle isn't it? If someone else I wouldn't worry at all. I wouldn't hesitate.
[Tina:] It's an embarrassment for people to come in and catch cold and think it's your mattresses that's done it.
[Josephine:] Mm.... If those men were not working on the gas I would go over there now, and I'd switch the fire and I'd leave it on.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Tina:] The thing is old Mark is there to see to it.
[Josephine:] Mark won't be there to see to it?
[Tina:] Why?...
[Josephine:] Because... how does M Mark know? Mark right, he's got up this morning and he's gone to Tenby. And he's gone to look around Tenby. While he's gone those men have gone in there. That's what I mean. He can't be standing there watching the bloody thing all the time.
[Tina:] No. But he could put a note on it. Please leave this fire on. Please do not touch this fire.
[Josephine:] Well they've got to haven't they? To disconnect the gas.
[Tina:] Oh I thought it was water problems....
[Josephine:] Gas. A gas water heater!
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] They've gotta disconnect the gas to get the water heater off the wall. And fix it to the
[Tina:] Well Mark will be back there tonight and he can switch it on when he comes home. Make it his responsibility.
[Josephine:] Oh you don't understand! In the meantime... the men have took the water heater off the wall. They've put it from that wall, and they've stuck it on to this wall. Oh let's connect it up... see if it works. Now in the meantime there's gas seeping through that fire there with no light.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] So you've blown your caravan.
[Tina:] Well then again, there's Mark and Sally.... You could take the mattresses and put them in their caravan in the spare bedroom. Is there a spare bedroom?...
[Josephine:] Well no. Cos Mark's going in one, Sally's going in the other....
[Tina:] Oh bring them home then.... Bring them home and tell them that you're taking them home to air....... And I don't suppose, they're not wet... you see. It's different... it's, they're damp... it's different if there'd been a hole and the water was coming in. They're not saturated.
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] It won't take them long.
[Josephine:] That's what I says. If those men wasn't working there I wouldn't hesitate. The fire would go on and I'd leave it on low
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] and the atmosphere would warm up... right through the caravan.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] But I'd hump them into the sitting room.... If those men came there on Tuesday
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] [sigh] and done their work... and Mark rang me here and said, on Tuesday... the caravan's great now, the fires are alright. I'd go straight over there and switch the fires on....
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] Well I'd even tell him to go down only he ain't got the keys....
[Tina:] Cos they're not going to take an awful long time in a good hot room... to dry....
[Josephine:] the only thing again that I'm thinking of... what if we gets them out of the caravan... and we gets them into the car and we're getting them in and out here... and then we gets them back into the car to take them back over and in to the caravan, what if we rip the bloody things?
[Tina:] Well if we rip them we rip them and I'll mend them.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] They are yours aren't they?
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] Put a patch on them....
[Josephine:] Then she turned round and she said, I said to her those beds are soaking, I said. There's nobody can sleep in those.... Yes, she said but er when I went down there to check after you'd gone, she said... erm... yours was erm... the driest of them sort of thing.
[Tina:] Suppose they didn't bother with them.
[Josephine:] And I said
[Tina:] Didn't bother with them. See they're alright....
[Josephine:] I said then... well I said from the time now, I said... there is nobody I said, can sleep on those mattresses. No she said, it does take a while for caravans to dry out.
[Tina:] Well say what you were saying
[Josephine:] So in other words... you don't go to the caravan.. Let it be their responsibility, they put them in there. Well Mark's going in at his own risk, see?
[Tina:] They sold them to you complete....
[Josephine:] So?
[Tina:] So they're yours. What's the good of a bed... a bed without a mattress?...
[Josephine:] I'm talking about the mattresses.
[Tina:] What are you talking about?
[Josephine:] The caravan!...
[Tina:] Well I thought you was talking about mattresses airing in front of the fire.
[Josephine:] Well that subject's gone!
[Tina:] Oh well
[Josephine:] I'm saying... that Park, what the woman said that she went down to check the vans... last summer
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] end of last summer.
[Tina:] long time since then....
[Josephine:] And to see that the salt was there and the mattresses were up and that was great. And she went down to check in the winter time and she said your van was really dry.
[Tina:] Oh. Well it all depends how she checked. perhaps.
[Josephine:] Well then they then they went and put the mattresses back... in their places.... Now the mattresses are soaking.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] And I said there's nobody can go and sleep on those mattresses. And she said well it does take a time for the vans to dry out.
[Tina:] Mm. Not until the sun comes hot and heavy on it....
[Josephine:] So whoever goes there, to anybody's van, that's what they're getting....
[Tina:] Oh well, I should take advantage now Mark is in, bring the damn things from there.... Then you can get him to help you take them back on Friday....
[Josephine:] I think we'd have to ring them up and let them know what we're doing....
[Tina:] Well go in office and tell them.... You can talk... personally better than on the phone.... Cos they are your mattresses aren't they?... When you take them back they're there for their inspection.... Unless you... you... take electric blanket down? Put it on, oh... You can't put that on a damp bed can you?
[Josephine:] Not really. Don't think so. Not...
[Tina:] Well they are protected.
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] Er er electric blankets.
[Josephine:] Don't know.
[Tina:] They're built er pretty, pretty good that way I think.... I don't know what about the lags for the wall
[Josephine:] And another thing, I didn't even look in Mark's room. Was there pillows and blankets and quilts in his... caravan?... I didn't look....
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... Well perhaps Sally had a hunt
[Josephine:] Dunno.... Oh well... Well I dunno I think I'll go and wash me hair. It's desperate for it.
[Tina:] I've gotta have a bath in the morning. tomorrow.
[Josephine:] Is it?
[Tina:] Well I'm not bound to, no.
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] Have a bath tomorrow. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Well you can have one []. Good god, you can have one now if you want it. [LAUGHTER]...
[Tina:] ...
[Josephine:] I hope... you know I'd er... see he'll have to put the back seat of the car down into a van.... Shit I'm afraid in case those mattresses rip.
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] Because they're so thin.
[Tina:] Well [cough] I'll mend the buggers [LAUGHTER] for you [].... And don't be afraid of a patch dear.
[Josephine:] It's not that I'm afraid of a patch....
[Tina:] Are caravan sizes the same as everyday sizes?
[Josephine:] The beds, the big beds are. The small beds aren't.... Well you can get erm two foot bunk beds nan.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] But they're not spring mattresses.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Although what's on the bed is nice mattresses.
[Tina:] Oh what's... have you got his dinner?
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Tina:] Oh. [LAUGHTER] Bloody cheek, do him the world of good to go without for a day or two. [LAUGHTER]...
[Josephine:] He won't eat it.
[Tina:] Well that's it, he he It's treating him like a kid of... five or six year old isn't it? He forgets that he
[Josephine:] Well the thing is he doesn't have a dinner every day of the week.
[Tina:] It won't hurt him. Lots of people don't have one at all.
[Josephine:] And then he looks forward to the weekends and that....
[Tina:] He had dinner yesterday before he went.... So that's his weekend dinner.... If he was in living in a flat by himself he wouldn't be having one at all.... Well I don't imagine, unless he went out for it.... Fish and chips at night is it, his dinner?...
[Josephine:] Look at the ruddy traffic.
[Tina:] Mm. Oh held up.
[Josephine:] Oh the lights have come higher up now.
[Tina:] Oh. It's Sunday today. There's more transport on the road I expect.
[Josephine:] The lights have been moved up the road.
[Tina:] Oh.... I don't like the glass in those windows.
[Josephine:] Where?
[Tina:] Coloured glass isn't it?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Don't look right somehow.
[Josephine:] Still, net curtains on them.
[Tina:] Eh?
[Josephine:] When you've net curtains on them....
[Tina:] There are four niggers in there.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] Four niggers in that.
[Josephine:] Mm.... Oh god.... Now I need the key.
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] Gonna need the key for this.... the west end of London....
[Tina:] The east end I think.
[Josephine:] East end then.
[Tina:] Oh he's got a nice shirt on. [tv on loud]
[speaker002:] in a pub he was, got drunk and for a twenty pound bet shaved off all his hair. [LAUGHTER] I still owe him the money. But he is stupid cos he went hitchhiking once and left a day early to avoid traffic. [LAUGHTER] Here, do you know what I fancy? I fancy an icecream. She said well I'll go and get you one. He said no, you know what your memory's like, you're bound to forget. She said no I won't, what do you fancy? He said well... I fancy [LAUGHTER] vanilla and strawberry icecream with chocolate sauce, raspberry sauce, crushed nuts and a flake. She said right, vanilla and strawberry icecream, chocolate sauce, crushed nuts. said right, I shall be back in five minutes. Two hours later she come back with a ham sandwich. [LAUGHTER] He said you silly cow! You forgot the mustard. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] East end. [LAUGHTER]... [tv on]
[speaker002:] This week on handy hints we are talking fishing. I once went for a job as a fisherman. The boss said Connolly you've got the job, you start on Monday. I said that sounds alright, could I have a sub? He said no you're on a fishing boat like everybody else. [LAUGHTER] Well one of the greatest qualities a fisherman can have is of course patience.... And you can spend the whole day without a bite. As for me, I always take my packed lunch. And pot noodles is one of my favourite dishes.
[Josephine:] No....
[Danny:] ...
[Josephine:] I don't think... that the pub is open... the cafs aren't open... the amusements aren't open.
[Danny:] The bar's open.
[Josephine:] No.... All locked up and in darkness....
[Danny:] ?
[Josephine:] We went there, had a look....
[Danny:] Perhaps they'll open at night time....
[Josephine:] Dunno. When he asked me when they opened. I don't know I said.... And what time do they shut? And I said I don't know but I said I shouldn't think it would be too late.... I dunno.... And er...
[Danny:] Did he eat the dinner?
[Josephine:] Well I dunno. I left it there and then... went down the caravan.... When we come back he'd got the dishes all ready for me....
[Danny:] So you don't know if he ate it or not?
[Josephine:] [yawning] No the dishes []. Mm? She gave me a key.
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] She told me here's your keys now she said because you've lost a set.
[Danny:] You didn't tell her any different did you?
[Josephine:] Well why didn't you tell me?
[Danny:] I did tell you! I told you yesterday.
[Josephine:] You told me they'd got a set of keys.
[Danny:] What's happened?
[Josephine:] So she give me a set of keys.
[Danny:] And?
[Josephine:] And erm... I give them to Mark.
[Danny:] Aye.
[Josephine:] And I told him I want them back, don't take them to the office.
[Danny:] So... what did they say about you keeping them on?...?
[Josephine:] I went in there again and I told her that you'd rung and some... Angela from sales... Andrea, we haven't got an Andrea she said.... So she said somebody else it could have been. I said I don't know I said.
[Danny:] Angela
[Josephine:] No.
[Danny:] I don't know....
[Josephine:] But erm... she said... she has said that we could do this and she said that's fine, she said. As long as you don't... as long as you don't put erm anything too near it.
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And I said Mark's here so that he can switch it... switch it off at nights. So anyway while I was there... Darren came in. Is everything alright? He said. Are all the jobs done?... And I said well look I said, I've got to come... because I said there's no way anybody... I said I wouldn't do it myself, I wouldn't put anybody in those beds.... I said something's got to be done and it won't wait. And I said I'm going to leave the fire on... and er Mark's here and he'll switch it off at night. That's alright she said. Let's see she said,th when's the first... when's your first booking? Not until, I think she said April twenty first....
[Danny:] Yeah that comes under the bookings.
[Josephine:] That's our first booking, paid booking.... Nothing about these ones that's already been in.
[Danny:] We're there
[Josephine:] Susan is there... she said the twenty first and I on the twenty first. But she wouldn't be on their books like that would it?
[Danny:] Well she'd be on a form, yes....... That's the twenty first of March.
[Josephine:] Yes. Well perhaps she was talking about Sue then. I don't know. I didn't really stop to find out. And er... she said that'll be alright. And Mark's there, I said he'll switch it off at night. Fine she said, as long as there's nothing left too near the fire.... So I took the envelope off those tickets and I tore that up and wrote down and I stuck it in the... water heater that the sitting room fire may be on, please check. I put another one then on the draining board. Cos if they're going to fix it round the sink, he doesn't know where they're gonna put it. You know, while I was there Darren came in. And he said er have all the jobs been done yet? And I said well no I said there's some water I said. Mark's on holiday this week I said. they've put him in another.... Oh that's right he said. I heard something about this he said, er... I was on holidays... all last week he said but erm... it's bloody lies cos I saw him last week.... And he said erm... yeah he said cos we've gotta pay this he said because it's all in the guarantee.... In the warranty.... And he came in and I said and the mirror on the dressing table isn't done.... You know and... that's gone and I said feel these beds I said. They're soaking wet. And he felt them and he said they are a bit he said. So I said well I... Danny rang this morning and he got permission to put the fire on... and put them, I'm going to move them all into the... front... and erm to air them up. And I said there's no way anybody can sleep in there. That's alright he said. And he checked and then he went... So I took the bags off the pillows in case they were sweating in the bags and I put them out on the seats. I put the quilts all out on the seats.... And.... Because there's eight... there's er... seven, there's eight pillows then and
[Danny:] He's done nothing.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] He
[Josephine:] ... Mm? The girl in the coun the girl behind the counter, the little tiny one. Small and
[Danny:] She's still there?
[Josephine:] tiny. Yes. She said how's Danny then? And I said oh he's at home I said this week I said and that oh and she said... well tell him to get over here and we'll sort him out. I said eh... I said when Danny comes in he'll sort you out. And she laughed about it.... Darren said you know the girls in the... were saying that you weren't well, how was you and... one of these days. I don't know what this is all for.
[Danny:] Well they th th the kids were there but
[Josephine:] And he said will you be there? And I said well I don't know.
[Danny:] You should have said yes, we're gonna try to. That's why I got the tickets.
[Josephine:] It depends now how er... mm I don't know.... tea?...
[Tina:] he enjoyed it for forty years.... two thousand five hundred pounds.
[Josephine:] Oh. He made a mistake. [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] You know, if there's nothing like the last week then... Did you have your tea Danny?
[Danny:] I had one piece of butter and jam. I can't take them tablets till I've eaten something.
[Tina:] Oh.... No empty stomachs.
[Danny:] No. So
[Josephine:] Terrible.
[Danny:] that was at four o'clock, I had to take a tablet....
[Josephine:] Mm. [yawn] Well Mark is quite contented where he is....
[Danny:] Sally said the caravan he's in is a lot better than mine.
[Josephine:] Ooh it's out of this world. I mean you can't compare it can you?... And the bedrooms!... You can't compare it, it's the rolls royce of caravans. That's, that Darren said oh aye, he's the one, he's in the maroon one he said. He's in the rolls royce. Top of the range he said.... Beautiful thing. Good god there's a mirror in the sitting room as big as that wall.... You'll see it when you go over there. Beautiful thing....
[Tina:] Yes,...
[Josephine:] And I said I've bought a box of matches for him to go down and light this fire... thinking you know he might need two or three matches at a time.... But er... well I gave him a box of matches to go with him and I thought oh well... he'll have plenty of matches then. And I took them in, he says... what do you buy them for? He said. I've got loads of matches. In this caravan everything's electronic.... Fridge, light switches ooh... beautiful thing it is.... Ten times the price of ours I expect.... [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] A caravan is a caravan after all, isn't it?...
[Danny:] But for what we want it for... ours is good enough.
[Josephine:] Good enough. That's what I'm saying perhaps... they must let it out though.
[Danny:] If we were having
[Josephine:] Why's Malcolm got it?
[Danny:] if we were having a caravan like that, I'd be too frightened to let it.
[Josephine:] I wouldn't. I wouldn't
[Danny:] Well there we are.
[Josephine:] let it.
[Danny:] There we are. I couldn't afford to pay for it then could I?
[Josephine:] No.... He's right up by the wishing wheel... well... or whatever it is.... You know this reproduction furniture?... And the little lead windows?... That's got it all inside it.... And the shower hasn't got a curtain it's got a big black door....
[Danny:] is it?
[Josephine:] No.
[Danny:] the shower is.
[Josephine:] ... Quite a few people there today. Whether it was the fine weather bringing them out or... yesterday.
[Danny:] Lot of owners where down checking it see.
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Danny:] Lot of owners were down... checking them.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] They were. You could see the mattresses all under the sheet.... And they were cleaning the windows and... washing the box
[Josephine:] I would do that next year.... Mm?
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] I'd do that next year.... We never saw that old girl trudging round today. [LAUGHTER]...
[Tina:] The life of a caravan isn't long is it?
[Danny:] Not we've got. When we bought it he told me I'd have at least ten years because the make of it is... it's a good make. And the make has got a lot to do with it.
[Tina:] Oh....
[Josephine:] And what is the make of it?...
[Tina:] Doesn't know why you let it like you do. You'll get kids in it running and jumping and wrestling about....
[Josephine:] And this woman said that she stated no animals. But she said they tell you that and she said they tell you, it's on computer she said, but animals do go in the vans.
[Danny:] Well I can tell you one thing, animals will not go into ours. And I tell you she's got a different contract with me altogether. You read our contract didn't you, last night?... It's there in black and white.
[Josephine:] Mm I know, that's what she said. I don't how she knows.
[Danny:] If I, if if I found out there was animals in our caravan, I'd take them to town....
[Tina:] But how do you know if you're not there every second?
[Danny:] You... you for one, like her, when you went to the caravan, you'd smell it like that.
[Tina:] Oh I.
[Danny:] But you'd smell it wouldn't you?
[Tina:] Mm....
[Danny:] And they know this.
[Tina:] Cos there are dogs there, great big ones.
[Danny:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Mm big white ones.
[Danny:] That... that man yesterday, he paid six thousand pound for his caravan. He s he said that on the tape.
[Tina:] Mhm.
[Danny:] I listened to the tape with her last night. He paid six thousand pound. We paid fourteen thousand seven hundred for ours.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] He hasn't got, ours is a gold golden olympic. He's not having the rent we're having.
[Tina:] No.
[Danny:] He's got a. He hasn't got a brand new caravan.... But he nearly gave six thousand pound for it.
[Josephine:] That's what they said though.
[Danny:] Yeah I know. I know they said it. I heard them. But a new caravan starts from eleven thousand eight hundred. That's the price of a new one.
[Tina:] I know they're as good as a house almost.
[Danny:] Well he said on that tape, I gave them a fat cheque of six thousand pounds.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] Well that isn't bloody... half of what we paid.... Yeah I'm paying for mine monthly, but I won't disturb fourteen thousand seven hundred.
[Tina:] Perhaps perhaps he's got a... an agreement. Like perhaps he bought the ground and the caravan, and then they had an agreement that er... Stone Park would er... b you know let it, be responsible for when they let it or something.
[Danny:] Yeah. See... there's different contracts altogether there.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] I mean he... she was going on that tape about she had to replace some things.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] She had... well I've got nothing like that.
[Josephine:] No.
[Danny:] If something is gone... they replace it.... That's part of the contract.
[Tina:] Well everything had gone on the one.
[Danny:] Well
[Tina:] Dishes and... furniture and
[Josephine:] Pillows.
[Tina:] everything was ripped out or destroyed.
[Josephine:] Pillows.
[Danny:] Well
[Josephine:] She had to pay for eight pillows.
[Danny:] Mm. We've had no bills like that. We were asked if we wanted to do the chassis.
[Josephine:] And... she was so toffee-nosed as if they said the curtains. Oh yes I'll have them c gotta have them done.
[Tina:] And and probably said they'd maintain the thing for her... at a price.
[Danny:] Well at a price yeah. I mean... they don't do nothing for nothing.
[Tina:] No of course not. They're out to get money, aren't they?... It's their living.
[Danny:] But when we had these things through for the chassis and the cleaning of the caravan, it was all optional.
[Josephine:] If I, if you wanted to go down there and scrub the van out, you go and scrub it out.
[Tina:] You go and do it.
[Danny:] And it saves
[Josephine:] And I will next year.
[Danny:] it saves thirty five pounds.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Danny:] But for that thirty five pounds... the carpets are shampooed, the seats are shampooed, the lot....
[Tina:] Were they in today?
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] The men?...
[Josephine:] Darren was there.
[Tina:] Oh he was the only one.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Cos there was two
[Josephine:] He come to see
[Tina:] two workmen went by.
[Josephine:] Yeah, further down. I even went, I was dying to go to the toilet... so I thought oh I'll go down to the big er... and I had no toilet paper... so I'll go down to the big toilets and shower rooms. They're all locked.
[Tina:] Everything's locked up there.
[Josephine:] Everything's locked there.
[Danny:] There's toilet paper in the caravan.
[Josephine:] No.... Not even the holder it was on. Gone....
[Danny:] Well when Roger and Mark was there, there was a toilet roll there.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Yeah well er Mark took a couple with him but course they're in the caravan with him.
[Danny:] No.... No.... He took them from here. When they went down to do the chassis
[Josephine:] Yeah, they took one
[Danny:] there was a toi
[Josephine:] in case they needed the toilet.
[Danny:] there was a toilet roll in there then.
[Josephine:] Well it's gone. And the cardboard roll off it....
[Danny:] Mm....
[Josephine:] I wonder who's got that grocery store?...
[Danny:] Oh when I was over there last
[Josephine:] It goes out to tender I expect.
[Danny:] when I was over there last they were, there was four trucks r loading that supermarket up.
[Tina:] Mm. Long lease I expect.
[Danny:] Four lorry loads of stuff there.
[Josephine:] Yes, it's could be like Thomas shop. He has it for so long.
[Danny:] Oh I don't know.
[Tina:] Mm. Three or four years perhaps at a time.
[Josephine:] Mm. And then you've gotta go. You've gotta put in tenders for it then.... Cos they must make a bomb though....
[Tina:] Unless Stone Park has got it.
[Josephine:] Cos a lot of stuff isn't in....
[Tina:] They could be put a manager in and... the benefits.
[Josephine:] I suppose they would. Mm. Perhaps they do.... And then there's staff there to run it.... I dunno.... Well the man with the bike, that's his business. And the ma and the people then with clothes last year, who were they now?... To the shop?...
[Danny:] [clears throat]... Was M was Mark's caravan warm?
[Josephine:] Well he didn't have a fire on, nothing. He was just lying there watching telly and reading the paper and
[Danny:] Did he have a paper?
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Danny:] Should have brought it back, did you?
[Josephine:] No. He bought the Saturday one that's got the week part in it.
[Danny:] Why didn't he come over and fetch the car then?
[Josephine:] Because he said there's no point, I don't want it.
[Danny:] Well I've got to take his over now, he'll have to bring me back.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] What I was going to tell him, if he was to come over, take my car there... when I'd have taken this car over, I would have had a car to come back.
[Josephine:] Well that's what he said.... He said you'd better keep the car there in case his won't be ready or something.
[Danny:] Mm....
[Tina:] Lot of kids about though....
[Danny:] In another couple of weeks spring then....
[Tina:] Would if the weather would take up.... But still they book regardless of weather don't they?
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Danny:] That's the night for my birthday.
[Josephine:] All the machines and everything are switched off in there.
[Danny:] Yeah but you see... on the, oh I don't know what date it is... sixteenth tomorrow... on the eighteenth erm... eighteenth, nineteenth, twentieth... they have Freddie and the Dreamers there....
[Josephine:] Well that's Wednesday.
[Danny:] Yeah. So they must be open at nights to practise.... Mark is there. Mark... Mark is going to it.... That George Roper's there the week after.
[Josephine:] Will Sally be able to go with him?
[Danny:] Course she will. She's got a member's ticket. She's a bloody erm member's ticket just like Mark has got. Don't cost her anything. But on that one, there's no children allowed in there.... It's adult only.... And there's a buffet with it. A free buffet....
[Tina:] Well now, do they run a show... and that racket's going on in the entertainment club at the same time?
[Danny:] Oh you can't hear it.
[Josephine:] The show is up in the other rooms. Huge big rooms up there.
[Danny:] In the room. It holds sixteen hundred and fifty people.
[Josephine:] We didn't go up there.
[Tina:] Mm. Well it must be one heck of a me er noises.
[Danny:] You can't hear a thing in there.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] No. We
[Josephine:] And there's a big dance hall there.... We didn't go into them because they were all closed up.
[Danny:] Do you remember that George and Mildred used to be on telly in comedy?
[Tina:] Oh yes. Oh I remember Mildred.
[Danny:] Well George
[Josephine:] Yeah well George's the drippy one.
[Danny:] She, she she's dead now er
[Tina:] Mm. Mm.
[Danny:] Mildred. Well George Roper is there... on the twenty eighth of March.
[Tina:] Oh is that his name?
[Danny:] Yeah.
[Tina:] George Roper.
[Danny:] Mm....
[Josephine:] George and Mildred.
[Tina:] She was funny. She was good....
[Danny:] He's there on the twenty eighth of March....
[Josephine:] Well what does he do then?
[Danny:] He's a comedian.... Well you know, bit of acting, comedian. Featuring stars cabaret George Roper and a full supporting programme....
[Tina:] I think that'll be very old.
[Danny:] Well he's fifties.
[Josephine:] Gonna say I don't think he could go on his own, go down on his own
[Danny:] Well. I mean they've got the comedians there er next week... for four nights. The ones that are on television. A string of comedians saying jokes one after the other.... Though this year
[Tina:] Well I I never thought much of George Roper. I I... he was nothing without Mildred.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] Well he like Harry Worth weren't he? It's er... the way he says things. He could make you laugh by looking at him.... I mean he is a comedian....
[Tina:] I thought she was the bottom of it all. It was she that kept the thing going.
[Danny:] Well no cos... the show was based on that er Spencer, what was his name?
[Tina:] Frank Spencer?
[Danny:] Frank Spencer and Betty thing. This show was based on the same thing. He was a s... she was the one that's alright and he was the stupid one. Like Frank Spencer used to do stupid things. Now that George used to have a bloody motorbike and a sidecar. The sidecar would go that way, motorbike would go that way. You know, stupid things....
[Tina:] Long time ago Danny. I don't remember much about these things.
[Danny:] I I remember that show. Never used to miss them.
[Josephine:] Reg On the Buses was like that as well.
[Tina:] Oh no I didn't like that.
[Josephine:] His sister and her husband, forget her name. Arthur was the husband.... Mm. Oh there we are....
[Danny:] Oh dear.... Ring Sally now then, cos she wants to put in the bath with her.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Well does she go in in the morning?
[Josephine:] No I dunno... Sally works on a Monday.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Danny:] Oh aye yeah.
[Tina:] So I dunno.
[Danny:] Eight o'clock I think she said last night.
[Josephine:] Finishing at eight?
[Danny:] She's going in about eight.
[Josephine:] Oh.
[Danny:] Oh I don't know. She'll tell you....
[Josephine:] That's alright then.... But I really should have looked at me plants.
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] I should have looked at me plants today.... Anyway our Darren came in, and I'm gonna forget... Darren came to the caravan and I was telling him about these wet sheets and beds and... the mirrors done and what I was doing there and... Oh he said and about the mattress he said... and I said to him mattress, it's still the same mattress. Yes he said, I've gotta wait he said. I'll be putting a new mattress in... er I'll be putting another mattress in. And he said I've got to put after dark. What do you mean after dark? I said.... He turned round well I've got to move about discreetly he said.... And I said erm you talking about then? And he said oh I've been taking it out of one of our own caravans, our own caravans he said.... new one. Oh there we are though he said, I don't want.... He said to me... have you got it on tape? I said no, no I haven't. No. And that's when he said... he said I'll be going up one night when it's dark he said. I'll take it out of one of our vans.... So I said what do you want me to do then, leave this mattress on the bed? And you'll be taking it?... And I said or shall I... it might not be done then I said so I'll have to air them. Oh yeah he said. That's what I'll be doing. Yeah. The microwave because... the microchef Mark... I forgot to ask you what was in the caravans, the sleeping arrangement.... Is there sleeping bags there? Is there... quilts or what do you know?... So I said to her take Kirsty's sleeping bag. Take your s... and I said have you got a sleeping bag? No.... I said well I gave Mark a sleeping bag and er... two blankets... and a couple of pillowcases. There must be pillows, I'm sure of it.... And erm... I said take Kirsty's sleeping bag... and call in here for a sleeping bag... and I'll give you a couple of blankets to go with it. And I said I'll.... So she said yes. She wants to know do you want buy her.... For a hundred and fifty pound....
[Mark:] Why is she selling it?
[Josephine:] No because er... well she said... Well I told her today, I said look Mark said there's no money. Or I said... the money you don't spend. I said when you come home... trousers, what you want.
[Mark:] What did she say?
[Josephine:] she said
[Mark:] small ones.
[Josephine:] Doesn't matter if they're long in the leg. He'll have to try the trousers on. He'll have to try the shoes on.... But he said on Wednesday and you'll pay in the money into the bank
[Tina:] Hannah was on.
[Josephine:] Oh god yes! Missed that and er... oh I forget where she went to.
[Tina:] Er Venezuela was it?
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] Erm where the... leaning tower of Pisa
[Josephine:] Pisa....
[Tina:] Nice, that's very nice...
[Josephine:] She don't go near a shop. She don't spend no money now much.
[Tina:] Oh yes she does. Oh yes she does. I see, she went in the shop and she bought the bloody shop.
[Josephine:] Did she?
[Tina:] A jewellers shop. And she bought a, a cameo... brooch with a little ring on top that she could put a chain in as well. You know, you can put the chain on it and
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] pin it on the brooch. And she gave two thousand lira for it. much. It was an awful lot cost two thousand lira. She's going to... next week she's going to the pope. Going to Italy and a visit to the pope.
[Josephine:] Rome....
[Tina:] Er Italy he said. But I thought er Pisa was in Italy....
[Josephine:] Ooh.... Clare Rayner.
[Tina:] God I do hate her.
[Josephine:] Look, she's getting bigger.
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] She's getting bigger as years...
[Tina:] she talking about?
[Josephine:] Still born babies....
[Tina:] What is all this? I don't know.
[Josephine:] What have you got?
[Tina:] The news and, oh yes... it's only a few minutes lovey.... Quarter past, no wait, quarter to six. It's quarter to seven.... Has your clock stopped?
[Josephine:] Quarter to seven.
[Tina:] So we've missed Highway?...
[Josephine:] We've missed the bloody lot.
[Tina:] Well Hannah's only just been on a second ago.... And then the news....
[Josephine:] Mm?...
[Tina:] Quarter to seven.
[Josephine:] Let's have a look what you've got.
[Tina:] Six forty five is quarter to seven isn't it?
[Josephine:] Mhm. So it'll come on after this.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] It's a documentary thing.
[Tina:] Yes, I suppose so.
[Josephine:] Ends, oh look......
[Tina:] Oh stupid old
[Josephine:] Mm.... Ooh....
[Tina:] Oh yes. Where's? No I don't know.
[Josephine:] I dunno.... [whistling]
[Tina:] [reading] has had to tear up its election coverage plans because tory ministers are scared to meet top industrialists [].
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Top industrialists, those are big business boys. [reading] Chancellor Norman Lamont and treasury ministers were told... er... chancellor Norman Lamont and treasury ministers were to be grilled like labour spokesmen by a panel of businessmen... and just one union leader []. But there was to be... Norman Lamont and a tr and treasury ministers, three or four of them. And there was to be the big industrialists, three or four of them. Same as labour was done the other day.... But the tories but the tories have scrapped agreed plans claiming the panel is not politically balanced.... [reading] The B B C two programme is regularly pr presented by Peter Jay who's Panorama Special on the slump was controversially axed last week [].... They're not willing to stand up... see erm... er what's it, Richard Dimbleby... was it Richard... or the other one?... Was
[Josephine:] Jonathon. Richard's dead....
[Tina:] No the boy, the other boy.
[Josephine:] Jonathon, Dick
[Tina:] No. What's his name?... The other boy. There's two boys alive....
[Josephine:] David?
[Tina:] Mm.... I don't know one from the other... by name. But the one was at him yesterday and he, well he didn't know what to say next.... He did quiz him.
[Josephine:] That's David....
[Tina:] Is it?
[Josephine:] On a Sunday.
[Tina:] Well... And, and er... Lamont even said... that er unemployment would get higher. He even said so yesterday
[Josephine:] Can't get no bloody higher can it?
[Tina:] Oh it could....
[Josephine:] Twenty two percent VAT if the tories get back....
[Tina:] Mm.... [reading] Jobless er tory jobless figures were exposed yesterday as a fraud. The official unemployment total of... two... two million six hundred... and four thousand one hundred... is more than a million short of the real figure... because the tories have found... thirty ways not to count jobless people []....
[Josephine:] That right?
[Tina:] They say unless you've been unemployed six months you're not unemployed. You're looking for a job. They don't call it unemployed.
[Josephine:] Well you can't go on the list for six weeks anyway.
[Tina:] Six months.
[Josephine:] six weeks, yeah....
[Tina:] Well if you haven't been working for six months you are looking for a job, you are not unemployed. They don't call that unemployment.... Course this is all... voting... propaganda again.... I mean when is it... it's a disgrace to the social service workers isn't it? To make them wear uniform.... They're getting them like prison officers and policeman and...
[Josephine:] Well it's the same as anywhere else.... If you work in Marks and Spencers you wear er their uniform.... If you work in the hospital you wear their uniform....
[Tina:] Yeah. That's only to advertise the place though isn't it? Marks and Spencers and...
[Josephine:] It isn't. If you went into your Clarke's shoe shop they've all got the same clothes. It's it makes it so easy that... the staff, one can't dress any better than the other. They're all equal....
[Tina:] When you go to places like... in the big stores... the staff have all got the same type of apron er overall. And that's for the customer, if it needs help they know who is who to go for advice.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] That's all it is. But when you've got people stood behind a desk and serving you and doing nothing but serving you as you come.... They'll be wanting bank clerks to have uniforms next.
[Josephine:] Good god bank clerks have been wearing uniforms for these last three four five years.
[Tina:] Oh I've never seen them.
[Josephine:] Well...
[Tina:] Never seen that.
[Josephine:] Well they all have.
[Tina:] It's customary to go to work dressed in black or white or suits or
[Josephine:] Not at all. It's navy blue with flowered blouse they've got.
[Tina:] I've never seen it.
[Josephine:] Each bank's different. Well they've had them for years. Well in the Midland Bank and they were wearing them the last time you were there.... The electric board wears them. The gas board wears them. Woolworths wear them.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And so really it is no different, just that they are making a song about it.... But there's no need to go to that prices....
[Tina:] a name on.... You can have the firm's name and give them a brooch or something....
[Josephine:] Well they've got them anyway, haven't they?
[Tina:] But... Val was on about it last summer. They was talking about it then. But she said that they had been so many months... or when everybody else had a pay rise they only had a little bit. And the extra that they should have had is going to pay for these uniforms.
[Josephine:] Oh....
[Tina:] didn't want the uniforms....
[Josephine:] Well a percentage is taken out of your money for them. There's no doubt about that.
[Tina:] Mm.... Well that's what she was on about that, and and they was... they were going
[Josephine:] Well everybody has got to do that.
[Tina:] to go on strike because of it....
[Josephine:] And really, it would be a good thing for Val.
[Tina:] Why?
[Josephine:] Well she's gotta pay so much for her bloody clothes.
[Tina:] She makes her own, a lot of them.
[Josephine:] She's still gotta buy the material....
[Tina:] Well she would rather have her own than be dressed up like... looking like rolled doll she said.... Cos they were all on about it. They were talking about going on strike over it, about it anyway.... Is it going to rain? Mm. Could have the odd little shower.
[Josephine:] No er tonight it's supposed to rain....
[Tina:] [reading] David the chief economist of Nat West Bank expects output to rise by only point six percent this year. A much lower rate than predicted by chancellor Norman Lamont... on last week's budget. Mr also believes interest and mortgage rates will remain high [].... So if people reads this paper... which is the, which of the papers are read the most? Which is the most popular paper?
[Josephine:] The Mirror and The Sun.... And Today I think isn't it?
[Tina:] Well The Sun is conservative. What's Today?
[Josephine:] Conservative....
[Tina:] I don't know.... Well The Sun... used to be a labour paper....
[Josephine:] Well didn't that er Rupert Murdoch take it over?
[Tina:] I don't know.... Rupert Murdoch? And he's a conservative? He's an Australian isn't he?
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] Whatever... I can't remember.... But I knew it before it was The Sun you see. No, what do you call it? Yes, The Sun. It was the Daily Herald wasn't it? When it came out first.... Ooh.... [reading] Senator Ted Kennedy revealed yesterday that he is to wed lawyer Victoria... who's father is to stand trial over an alleged fraud. Kennedy sixty started dating the thirty eight year old divorced mother of two last June. I love her and her children very much... he said. Victoria's father retired []... oh he's... [reading] father's... Victoria's father, retired judge Edmund denies fraud []. The Kennedy's are in... trouble every corner aren't they?...
[Josephine:] It's nothing to do with him.
[Tina:] No, but er I mean he's even marrying into trouble.... The whole of his family. His father and all.... [reading] Remand prisoners at a top security jail used a thin mobile phone to make threatening calls to court witnesses it was revealed yesterday. An astonished guard alerted Durham Jail chiefs when he heard a phone ringing in a cell. A search revealed the battery operated handset hidden under a mattress. Calls made from it were traced by police to the homes of witnesses due to give evidence in trials on Tyneside. At least one case is understood to be involved in a murder charge. A top level enquiry is underway into the racket. Dubbed by prison wives the cellnet scandal after the cabinet mobile phones system. Visitors are thoroughly searched before they are allowed in to the jail which houses two hundred remand prisoners, killers, I R A terrorists and rapists, and the investigation will examine whether a prison officer may have brought in the phone. One senior officer said... it would be extremely difficult to smuggle one in, security is so tight here on visits []. Oh well, there's always a lapse isn't there?... What time does this budget start today I wonder? Not that we've
[Josephine:] What budget?
[Tina:] heard it all before.
[Josephine:] What budget?
[Tina:] This er, the labour giving their... oh dear...
[Josephine:] Is Barnado's advertising?
[Tina:] ...
[Josephine:] Back again....
[Tina:] Oh there.... [reading] Make a credit card donation. Or for more information about our work ring []....
[Josephine:] Right let's go and empty the washing machine. Put another load in.
[Tina:] It's not drying.
[Josephine:] No I don't
[Tina:] Although the wind is rising apparently.
[Josephine:] Mm.... It's Des O'Connor tonight.
[Tina:] Oh god.
[Josephine:] So that's something to look forward to.... [LAUGHTER]
[Danny:] They were in a meeting.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] All of them, all of them
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] except for one
[Josephine:] The little one?
[Danny:] Aye.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Oh I said I wanna. I said I've got a tape here. I said I'm sure he'll want to listen to this?... And she said what do you mean? I thought you were gonna go and tell him... that he'd better see me today. I, I've got a tape here and I'm sure he's gonna be interested in this. Or I'm taking my caravan off here right now.
[Tina:] Oh yes. Get a forklift and put it in the bloody garden see.
[Danny:] So she said well you can't do that. I said I bloody can do that. That is my caravan, not yours.... I said I can do it. And I will do it if that man's not gonna see me.... So with that... call it coincidence, call it what you like... but one of these low-loaders come in... to pick up a caravan or something like. And I said there you are, he's there waiting to pick my caravan up. He was empty you see. I don't know who he was.... And she said wait here Mr and in she goes in to this bloody meeting... and out he came. And he said I'm sorry Mr but you haven't got an appointment. I said do you want me to have an appointment, do you want to listen to this tape? Or do you want me to take my caravan off here?... He said why? I said because I feel I'm being. I said I'm not getting a fair square deal here. I said and not only I think that, other people on the site think so.... He asked me if I could wait five minutes.... when I'm in there. And Darren was on a day off and he's been. And Darren come in spoke to me and he says... oh I Danny. I said no you bloody won't. You'll get in that office with me. I said I want him in there. He sold me the caravan. And I went in there. I says now... have you had any visitors from... a couple of nights in my caravan. No he said.... I said I think somebody's saying some untruth to me.... I said because I've got a tape here... and there's a couple who'll go to court if necessary. And I said is my caravan being cleaned weekly... as people go out if they've got it for a fortnight fortnightly. Yes he said. I said well you play that I said cos I've played it back. And out he goes and gets this woman and in she comes with a chart... with a woman's name... the job number, that done it week by week or fortnight, whatever it does. And that is all there and signed that she done the caravan.
[Josephine:] It's her signature.
[Danny:] Her signature. That the caravan is cleaned. It's got to be he says. He said because people leave their dirty things and beds and all this kind of thing. He said we cannot allow that.
[Josephine:] Well you can understand that.
[Tina:] Yes, well he knows from experience.
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Danny:] He said we can't allow people. He said if something like this got out, he said, we'd be out of business. He said and do you know that we're a multi- million pound organization.
[Tina:] Of course, of course.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] He said we're not. So I said well... a couple approached my wife here on... on Saturday. I said and they're very happy and ninety nine percent of the people on this site are happy. Solid like. And I said I... you tell me if I'm happy. Cos you've gotta convince me now, this morning, or my caravan's going off here.... I said and before you start... that the caravan can't go for four years,... on this tape.
[Josephine:] Did he listen to it?
[Danny:] Oh yes.... Bring that here. chicken or is it
[speaker002:] It's chicken.
[Mark:] I don't want no chicken, I just want the chips....
[Josephine:] Do you want some lamb then?
[Mark:] No I just want some chips.
[Danny:] If you'd rather have the lamb I'll have chicken.
[Mark:] No no. I just want some chips.
[Josephine:] Do you want tea?
[Mark:] I'll have coffee please.
[Danny:] Anyway he wants to ask when this tape goes back, if he can have a copy of it.... He rung his managing director up... there in front of me.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] At... Hemel Hempstead.
[Tina:] Hemel Hempstead?
[Danny:] Yeah.... And he said he'd got a very
[Josephine:] Pizza?
[Mark:] Yeah, please.
[Danny:] serious complaint that he'd just got. That... I'm in the office with him. ... And er he to the managing director that I was in the office with a very serious complaint. And making accusations.
[Josephine:] And you were making accusations?
[Danny:] Yeah. I was.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] And he wanted to know what steps he could take.
[Tina:] Well Danny wanted to know if it was true....
[Danny:] So they asked... they wanted to know how, how we got the tape. So I showed him that letter you had.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] And he asked me to a ask you to... when they ra give the tape back... if they could possibly supply a copy of it, of that tape... to them. In the meantime he's gotta write to these people. They know the people.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] To instruct them that their caravan must be taken off within twenty eight working days.
[Josephine:] They know the people who were talking?
[Danny:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] I said they would. Mm?
[Danny:] And the caravan must be taken off within twenty eight working days.
[Mark:] Well I think it was taken off this morning.
[Danny:] No, it's still there.
[Mark:] Cos I saw that er bloke in er park landrover.
[Tina:] Oh you saw him that day didn't you?
[Josephine:] Well they're moving and hunting caravans all the time Mark. They're on the roadways
[Danny:] Yeah well he he said he said
[Mark:] No I'm talking about I saw, actually saw that guy who's in our caravan
[Josephine:] Oh yeah?
[Mark:] in a landrover... with a park bloke.... And all of a sudden three big juggernauts came into the camp and one of them was on the back of a truck. They they they
[Tina:] Well er er sh
[Mark:] they took three off the site.
[Tina:] Did
[Josephine:] She said she couldn't take it off.
[Danny:] No, he
[Mark:] Maybe it wasn't him then. I just thought it looked like him.
[Danny:] He told me it was still there and that he'd been told he's got to write to them today... and they've got to get it taken off within twenty eight days.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Cos she was trying to find a, a reason... or an excuse... to sue them for it.
[Josephine:] She stated that.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] It's all on the thing. Mm.
[Danny:] And he said how can they do that? Is it in the law? They don't break the law. They can't afford to break the law.
[Tina:] No well
[Josephine:] But you can understand that.
[Tina:] The thing is Danny is that they said they'd only bought the thing in July. Well the, the, the camp is closed...
[Danny:] Yes.
[Tina:] in, in
[Josephine:] In October, end of October.
[Tina:] so that was only er July to September
[Josephine:] Don't give them time for the
[Tina:] to October.
[Danny:] Yeah well what they bought Hardly two months. was an eight year old caravan they bought
[Josephine:] Oh brand new.
[Danny:] No. Eight year old.... Six thousand pound
[Tina:] Brand new she told us.
[Danny:] But it isn't, it's eight year old.
[Tina:] Brand new she told us.
[Danny:] That's why
[Tina:] Emphatically.
[Danny:] she had to supply the blankets and dishes and everything else.
[Tina:] Oh! Coming round now aren't we?... That's what she told us, brand new.
[Josephine:] She's looking for batter.
[Tina:] Does it say that on your... brand new?
[Josephine:] Said it didn't it.
[Danny:] No, he just said he paid six thousand pound... on the tape, for the caravan. Which was true.
[Tina:] Yeah. Well does it say on the tape that it was brand new?
[Danny:] No.
[Tina:] Because they repeated that several times.
[Danny:] No, what she said was that we spent er no he said... I gave a fat cheque for the caravan. And then he said six thousand pounds. And he said of course the site fees are in that. First part of the year actually.
[Tina:] Yes. Yes well even so, if they bought it say the middle of July, there's July to September to October. Er they weren't in it three months. They didn't have it until the camp closed. Three months.
[Josephine:] They wouldn't have had it long enough to clear their own ground rent.
[Tina:] Expenses like
[Josephine:] Well apart from the cleaning and all that and getting a bit of profit.
[Danny:] Well we bought ours in August... and we had enough to clear the profit.
[Josephine:] Yes but it was already bookings from the year before weren't it?
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] It wasn't ours.
[Mark:] Plus the fact their bookings wouldn't be as much as yours if it's an eight year old caravan.
[Danny:] Mm.
[Josephine:] No....
[Tina:] But you'd have thought by her that it was immaculate.
[Josephine:] It was a luxury thing, yeah.
[Danny:] No. It was eight year old.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Wonderful how you isn't it []?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] This man... this Mr wants to meet you, to apologize to you
[Josephine:] Oh.
[Danny:] whatever. For the... discomfort, the upset that you went through... with having to listen to her.
[Josephine:] While I was there Mr was the other side of the counter.
[Tina:] But we enjoyed ourselves didn't we? We enjoyed it.
[Josephine:] And he just dived into the bloody office.
[Danny:] When you were in the caravan.
[Tina:] No. this people.
[Josephine:] With the fire?
[Tina:] With the people.
[Danny:] With these people.
[Tina:] This man and woman.
[Josephine:] Yeah?
[Danny:] He wasn't there then was he?
[Josephine:] No. Go on.
[Danny:] No. Well that's what he wanted to apologize to you for.
[Josephine:] Yeah....
[Tina:] Whereas it isn't his place to apologize is it?
[Danny:] No but he feels that
[Tina:] Guilty.
[Danny:] that you've been er
[Tina:] Put upon.
[Josephine:] Yes.
[Danny:] as he said stamped on, he said.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] Well it were unwarranted....
[Tina:] But it was a bit of a surprise, strangers coming to the door.
[Josephine:] Well I couldn't believe it. I wondered what the hell she wanted.
[Danny:] So he see he said... she did come here. I have spoken to her twice. And explained everything to her. And if she wanted to go in a silver olympic then... I needed to explain to her that she must buy a silver olympic caravan... to have the guaranteed bookings.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Oh they hadn't got
[Danny:] No.
[Tina:] that was the difference then, they hadn't got
[Josephine:] She'd got a square one in the middle like.
[Tina:] Sh they hadn't got er guaranteed bookings? It doesn't come under the same scheme.
[Mark:] Have you stirred this?
[Josephine:] Oh maybe not....
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] That's a new one.
[Josephine:] Oh mother! Go on I'm busy. [LAUGHTER] It would have been me pencil if I'd had a pencil in me hand. [LAUGHTER] Sure they do the work anyway.... Was he annoyed cos I'd taped it?
[Danny:] No.... He was annoyed at the bloody woman letting me have. Buy by god he made that woman come in there. Cos everybody in Park is responsible for
[Josephine:] For their own.
[Danny:] for a section.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Like Darren is responsible for sales.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] And that other one is responsible for the paperwork. And that bloke is responsible for seeing that everything is put in place.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] And this woman is responsible for all the cleaning staff. And you know that is one hundred and eighty people on the s cleaning staff in the season.
[Tina:] I dare say.
[Danny:] One hundred and eighty people.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] a couple of thousand more people there isn't there.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] To clean for.
[Danny:] And he said... he said... they've got eight hundred caravan parks throughout the country.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] And this is the smallest, park....
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] And he said I've been with them twenty nine years.... He said I started off with them when I left school. And he's been there twenty nine years.
[Tina:] Was it a surprise to him Danny?
[Danny:] Yeah well he said he hasn't heard nothing like it before.... And he said he, they even mention my name, he said.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... That is the only name on the tape. Cos she didn't tell us her name. She didn't ask us our name. Yeah yeah
[speaker002:] the kids can ring him tonight
[Josephine:] Ring you?
[speaker002:] Ah?
[Josephine:] Ring you caravan...
[speaker002:] Oh well, he'll, he'll have to wait until the car to get a car
[Josephine:] You win the caravan? mm
[speaker002:] What date?
[Josephine:] Saturday
[speaker002:] This Saturday coming?
[Josephine:] Yeah eh...
[speaker002:] I don't think I could remember cos I've got physiotherapy tomorrow at the hospital
[Josephine:] mm mm mm
[speaker002:] right
[Josephine:] So when you having the car back do you think?
[speaker002:] Friday but they're not making a promise, but they said that last week
[Josephine:] Yeah
[speaker002:] and have it back Saturday and then they ring up two hours later saying it's another week and a half again
[Josephine:] Yeah
[speaker002:] rang this morning
[Josephine:] Yeah
[speaker002:] and he said he was
[Josephine:] yeah yeah yeah yeah mm right, right mm Well it, and it feels nice and clean no, it feels clean don't matter, it just feels clean, I've had it short and shaped, have a good shape on it... and do you know the next time you have it cut... I don't know... you want looking at, now the next time you go, go to the Darrow in Milford... yeah... because you're in problems and they know you need it... because he'll give you a good shape on it... and then you have it shaped once a month or once every three weeks or once a fortnight and keep it looking nice that way and it's four pounds, four ninety nine, four ninety, four seventy five... yeah... but just keep it nice and shaped... and it won't look any different, there ain't nothing wrong with it... mm... mm... mm... no... no... right, right, right tra la
[Tina:] And when she came, when her mother came then she was blonde weren't she? A real old blonde
[Josephine:] I've only seen her once
[Tina:] the car do we?
[Josephine:] Yeah, that's one
[Tina:] Blonde Ain't got a blonde hair in her bloody head, no it's all grey
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Perhaps she'd like then, like a vitamin A
[Tina:] What is vitamin A?
[Josephine:] No it's not
[Tina:] have they put her on a diet?
[Josephine:] Yeah
[Tina:] They've given her something and she, she had to put this stuff on her hair, had to take a trip to the hairdresser... and he said to the hairdresser comb my hair first and then put this stuff on... and wait for a fortnight and it did come a little lighter, but it wasn't much
[Josephine:] well there you are she's been going to oh don't tell me that
[Tina:] What?
[Josephine:] she is always going to the hairdresser and having her hair frizzed oh, oh god
[Tina:] No she doesn't
[Josephine:] oh
[Tina:] no she does not
[Josephine:] oh, she might peculiar hairdresser
[Tina:] she's got her hair cut and she put her heated thing on the bottom of it, rollers
[Josephine:] Well that's just the thing you do with it
[Tina:] Oh god no it's not
[Josephine:] that's nothing, burn your hair like that
[Tina:] that doesn't touch the roots,
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] You never
[Tina:] You never put the colour in her hair, nothing
[Josephine:] Oh she doesn't have to put colour in, she's had a go at it, I've seen her doing it herself
[Tina:] What?
[Josephine:] er hot tongs and all that proper caper
[Tina:] They're not heated, it's a heated roller
[Josephine:] yeah well it hasn't
[Tina:] it's not
[Josephine:] always been a heated roller
[Tina:] Yes it has...
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Thank god when you was up in Liverpool up there somewhere, and she was working in that factory, she was at it every day, I was
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] The doctor had been he's seen her and he told her it's a hormone deficiency, nothing to what she done to her hair...
[Tina:] All she's supposed to do now is wait till it grow again
[Josephine:] If it grows, or she can lose the lot
[Tina:] I'll have to have a wig
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Tina:] Well she'll have to have a wig
[Josephine:] She said no, she said, he told her if she wanted to go to the expense of a wig, she could get a wig and she wear it when she went out, but when she comes in the house she must take it off, she must not wear that wig only
[Tina:] It would
[Josephine:] so I said as soon as you get your hair cut and shaved, then you're better off without your wig, leave it well alone, she said that's what I'm gonna do, that's what she's gonna do
[Tina:] Leave it alone
[Josephine:] she does wanna get a wig and cover it doctor said she could if she wanted to
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] only wear it to go out
[Tina:] and that, and there's a possibility then, that her hair will grow again
[Josephine:] said it looked alright, but to me she said it's terrible because it's so short, I've never had it this short in my life... but he said it looked OK
[Tina:] Mm
[Josephine:] she was going to fairly soon after the accident West Hill development, two to three bedroom bungalow for her
[Tina:] Oh god... it's good innit?
[Josephine:] perhaps he wanted to get in with her West Hill development
[Tina:] And all that houses here are waiting to be sold and... nobody seems to want, poor old house is getting for waiting
[Josephine:] Oh ours is the poshest
[Tina:] They don't, once they're empty they don't take long till they sell it... over there and there
[Josephine:] Its everywhere isn't it?...
[Tina:] how are
[Josephine:] I would think the D H S S take over a bit but then they haven't got money all the time to find go without, but at least they're having the money back aren't they?
[Tina:] Yes, and
[Josephine:] not paying out for it all the time
[Tina:] put them into upstairs and downstairs flats
[Josephine:] mm
[Tina:] you'd as quick as possible...
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Right, pushing you in?
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] That board comes in
[Josephine:] pushing you in, there you are everything always
[Tina:] What, I don't but er [LAUGHTER] it isn't often you see often you see, there isn't a lot of long red books about... well here's a good big one
[speaker002:] ......
[Josephine:] No innit?
[Tina:] Mm
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Oh Mark said he saw those people going from there this morning.
[Josephine:] No he said he saw, said he saw them there again this morning
[Tina:] Oh
[Josephine:] but he said that in a Landrover and he thought had a van, but the spare room I told Danny that he's got to get off in a he couldn't, it might not have been him cos I didn't think
[Tina:] no and we didn't see where they were, oh well
[Josephine:] Yeah we'll do it on the way back
[Tina:] Oh, sure of the time. I hope they can do it. Oh you went to doctors will you
[Josephine:] Yeah, well look at the time and I said got in here
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Oh god, oh god, oh that bloody dog last night I could've wrung his neck, mm I could've, he just didn't damn well stop...
[Tina:] Eh?
[Josephine:] Oh he's
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Oh dear
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Nothing at all is there one that does er painting?
[Tina:] Yeah no Easter I don't know what painting's out, look at all these but er, it's, it's a nice position
[Josephine:] I know, there's steps all the way up the front
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] go in
[Tina:] if you, if you you know if you're young it's, it's good, it's a nice I think that, every one of these in the area must be coming down now you mind, my god, I didn't he needs me... a new home
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] [yawn] oh dear I could rest
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... Another shop opened here where the chip shop was... ooh it is a chip shop
[Josephine:] Ah?
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Where are you going? Well I will go
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Tina:] will go home, I want take me coat off before I
[Josephine:] Why?
[Tina:] Because it will be one thing less to do
[Josephine:] Why do you
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] no wind, no nothing to disturb the atmosphere...
[Josephine:] Cold innit?
[Tina:] No it's not... oh...
[Josephine:] What?
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Why?
[Tina:] Perhaps he don't know when he'll be coming
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] None of these are parking in you know when you pick the kids up from school
[Tina:] Getting the kids now?
[Josephine:] Mm mm, mm...
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Did they have in the road this wide, when they could've had
[Tina:] a waste like that, it's a pure waste now
[Josephine:] Yeah, and made the road up a bit wider all the way, room for passing
[speaker002:] .........
[Tina:] The house going up next to the launderette
[Josephine:] Yeah
[Tina:] or is it extending onto the pub?... Funny innit? Stupid idea
[Josephine:] The height, with your bloody shoes on, cos I was gonna say I'm five foot and a half inch and I'm taller than you
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] and then I said oh look at the bloody heels you've got on [LAUGHTER] oh my god... can't get in there...
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] and er
[Tina:] you won't have time to make a row
[Josephine:] Eh?
[Tina:] There won't be time to make a row... who, oh, what a minute, erm...
[Josephine:] I'm doing it... The last one need a stand? and I think this one's gone
[Tina:] yeah
[Josephine:] Erm twenty four...
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] And she's got a bag whether she's been shopping or, I you know she's got stamps with her an'all...
[Josephine:] Ooh, [yawn] excuse me...
[Tina:] Me feet
[Josephine:] there's that man going down there, now, see, thank god he's deaf
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Look at the camellias that's come out
[Tina:] Ooh lovely
[Josephine:] It's gonna be a mass of bloom innit?
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] And I've seen them for years and years, twenty odd more than that years, beautiful,
[speaker002:] ......
[Tina:] Oh, erm when you was in the front office er, Mr and Mrs
[Josephine:] Yeah
[Tina:] he's got two dogs with them he's got another one
[Josephine:] I, you say they've got three dogs
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] well they still have three dogs
[Tina:] Well let's see he's got that old brown one, you know
[Josephine:] Mm
[Tina:] and that's er can, a little black er, oh scotty looking thing
[Josephine:] Mm
[Tina:] you know like that is only a black one
[Josephine:] Mm
[Tina:] he's gonna go
[Josephine:] Can you imagine the bloody things on in house
[Tina:] And they're only little tiny rooms
[Josephine:] Yeah
[Tina:] and, and now she's got a grey whippet thing
[Josephine:] Yeah... It makes you wonder where the hell he can put them.
[Tina:] I wonder why he keeps them? Er, I don't know what his job is, is he a manager or is he unemployed at the moment?... Er I was thinking they kept dogs in room
[Josephine:] He's the manager of Milford office
[Tina:] Yeah, but er there's no money kept in or anything like that
[Josephine:] No
[Tina:] but little, people couldn't break in for erm...
[speaker002:] .........
[Josephine:] Are you coming in
[Tina:] well there's no need keep that in case you got to pay for it, it er, you won't do it now this moment
[speaker002:] ...
[Mark:] Erm, forty or fifty seven in bulk and erm beech, copper beech mm, so you'll be more than welcome to come over, you will be
[Danny:] Father
[Mark:] we will speak as the symbols of and the
[Danny:] Where, where, where down by the
[Mark:] It's right in the centre of the village Danny, it's the and erm
[Josephine:] Let's have a look
[Mark:] I mean in the meantime I'll be and I've got er
[Josephine:] No we don't do anything like that, but you might be able to get that
[Mark:] oh from the National st, erm the National I get twenty pence coming from them you see er
[Josephine:] A new one in, where the
[Mark:] but yeah it should go well
[Josephine:] no, it's another one
[Mark:] it should go well
[Josephine:] in the precinct, yeah, where, they've got wedding dresses in the windows outside
[Mark:] and it was we could have erm
[Josephine:] and you go up in there, there on the right hand
[Tina:] Ah, right
[Josephine:] Erm, what is there
[Mark:] but that
[Josephine:] what is that still in the loft?
[Mark:] But yeah
[Josephine:] No, it isn't, it's the gremlins in the corner over there, it's alright
[Mark:] OK thanks very much
[Danny:] Thank you very much indeed
[Josephine:] Thanks
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Mm
[Josephine:] No, I he say I tell you where I get that he said, because There's one going...
[speaker002:] .........
[Josephine:] I know they put flowers all twisting up it and over it and round about it... and now's the weather to get the job done and get it finished, look at the weeds growing up through the garden
[Tina:] put that spray on it and kill it
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] and of course they've got to be careful in case they kill the grass and around the outside is what It don't last
[Josephine:] and it's like that and they haven't finished it
[speaker002:] ......
[Josephine:] I think it is moving a little bit
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] The little ones go out on their own
[Tina:] Mm...
[Josephine:] and there's a white one coming in look over the end of the jetty there
[Tina:] Oh yes...
[Josephine:] Good god you'd think erm [cough], to, er put the piles on that.
[Tina:] Don't they?...
[Josephine:] Mm
[speaker002:] ......
[Tina:] Mm
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Oh I, nothing in the cupboard
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Yes that
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Yes I put me belt on through
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] he's out of home now, he never used to be
[Tina:] No
[Josephine:] he use to have his own house, last year he went into it... you'd think they'd get some of it and to weed the gardens
[Tina:] pass the time looks to me as though he can hardly walk [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] that was his feet...
[speaker002:] ......
[Josephine:] They must be coming up to er... rush time
[Tina:] Yeah, and a lot of
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Anything exciting going on here? Perhaps has took his contract over... because he can't afford to put more of them, mm
[Tina:] No, and if they do that sort of thing they can charge the earth for it
[Josephine:] No they can't charge any more than what they've got now, because they can't bloody sell it, look at her Ah, it's a right teaser
[Tina:] Good enough innit?
[Josephine:] That's ah Mrs bloody dog [LAUGHTER] oh bugger it, why should she have to clean it up, she should take it, put it in the bag and post it to the environmental health
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Mm
[Tina:] That'll do them a favour wouldn't it?
[Josephine:] Once, you would think he, she wouldn't have seen it or she wouldn't have
[Tina:] No
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] I can just see David doing it
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] and he said of all the places along that road, they have to come and do it outside his
[Josephine:] Well it might as well be outside his as somebody else's
[Tina:] Well that's what I said to him, why not yours [LAUGHTER] he only just cut it, that couple of grandsons they've all done it all up
[Josephine:] Well that's ripe and fresh and juicy
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Josephine:] [sigh]... Oh well... you'll have to write that date down in your book now
[Tina:] Yeah...
[Josephine:] what did you say twenty second?
[Tina:] Yeah
[Josephine:] mm you bring your book cos you don't think to look at the card...
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Give us a car, look at this car
[Tina:] Oh that's a nice one innit?
[Josephine:] Green
[Tina:] Oh
[Josephine:] It's an antique.
[Tina:] Running the roads
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] Running the roads
[Josephine:] Oh it's not out very often Yeah, that's not very often...
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] Where we used to stay in people there they've got a good an enormous thing like a Rolls or a Daimler or a
[Josephine:] mm
[Tina:] Very, very expensive cars, they use big
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] I don't know but they used to go but they didn't really used to go
[speaker002:] ...
[Tina:] There's some more planning going on here
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] No If you pay for you wouldn't buy that for a grand off them people he said at no price belongs to the the garage
[Tina:] ...
[Josephine:] belongs to the Why? It's behind it ain't harming nobody
[Tina:] Oh well it's down the corner, it, you know, they build on it, you're entitled to go on it
[Josephine:] No, it's behind the shop where that rubbish all is...
[Tina:] blowing this way
[Josephine:] What the hell is this white car?... Stranger in the camp
[speaker002:] ......
[Tina:] Mm?
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Down you come and put it away...
[speaker002:] ......
[Josephine:] What?
[speaker002:] ...
[Josephine:] Yeah... Mark reckons they've done a good job on the water have they?
[Danny:] Well... I don't know....
[Tina:] When we were at the flat... er... I'm not quite sure, I think the one was a Tuesday and the other was a Sunday, when there was a bus used to go down to Tenby
[Josephine:] the bus?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] It still does.
[Tina:] Mm
[Danny:] It still does.
[Tina:] Does it?... Well Mrs er... and her family, you know, used to go down there.... Because we went once or twice.
[Josephine:] What, on the bingo bus?
[Tina:] Mm. They used to go about... one o'clock.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... And pick up at quarter past seven at night.
[Tina:] Oh they're still
[Danny:] Quarter past six.
[Josephine:] Oh six I mean and then they come back at
[Tina:] they're still going down?
[Josephine:] ten, eleven o'clock.
[Tina:] This one went down in the afternoon. After dinner.... come back about
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] nine to ten....
[Josephine:] Unless they've scrapped the noon sessions.... But the main bingo bus that used to go used to go about six.
[Danny:] Quarter past six.
[Tina:] Oh I don't know, this was an afternoon bus. You know, early afternoon.... And used to go on it....
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] ...
[Josephine:] It erm... well I dunno cos if you were in bingo they would say the bingo bus goes at...
[Tina:] Oh we didn't go to bingo. [LAUGHTER]... But it was though.
[Josephine:] Well that must have been just a bus going.
[Tina:] Well.... Perhaps they were having two sessions, afternoon and evening....
[Josephine:] Maybe. They'd of announced it wouldn't they?
[Tina:] I dunno....
[Josephine:] Won't be long then.... Ta ra Danny....
[Tina:] Is this thing on?
[Josephine:] Mm.... Won't be long.... Can you see the moss? Look. It's all round here.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Look at it all here, brightening up.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Look at it picking up....
[Tina:] It's our summer coming.
[Josephine:] Yeah, look at it. Everywhere.
[Tina:] And look at that.... Clover all in it.
[Josephine:] Yeah. Well I'd rather have clover than bloody moss.... I don't know what I can do with it. He won't. I told him last summer about it....
[Tina:] Well I think it's cheating...
[Josephine:] If I knew where it had come from I would do it.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] Look at this little one coming up here.... That's...
[Tina:] Oh there's our chimney having a smoking session. Is it?
[Josephine:] Aye.... Right.... Now there's somebody behind us....
[Tina:] Look at these baskets.
[Josephine:] Mm.... They're only baskets to keep the birds off.
[Tina:] Oh.... Oh Danny's been in this bloody car. Don't know how he does it. Yeah?
[Josephine:] Look there's the chimney.... phaw
[Tina:] Oh oh my goodness yes.
[Josephine:] stinking.
[Tina:] of it.
[Josephine:] Poof.... I'd like to see the flames go whoof out of the top.
[Tina:] Yes and me. [LAUGHTER] And the smoke coming up thick and heavy.... Look how those yellow flowers are coming out pretty.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] Couple of days makes all the difference.... Who is 's fish and chips?
[Josephine:] Well 's fish and chips.
[Tina:] Is that their name?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Mr and Mrs?
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] Oh....
[Josephine:] Oh!... It just looks foggy over here now.
[Tina:] Yes. She said it was going to be foggy tonight.
[Josephine:] Mm.... Daffs are looking nice aren't they?
[Tina:] Yeah....
[Josephine:] I've got indigestion since dinner.
[Tina:] Yes and me.
[Josephine:] Oh my god, it's terrible.... See if it was warmer and dryer, I'd go out there and I'd rake that... lawn.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Cut it short and I'd rake hell out of it.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] And then I would pour moss killer over it. Then you've gotta rake it again.
[Tina:] Well I I think it's a whole summer's job isn't it?
[Josephine:] Well how else can you get rid of it?
[Tina:] No, well it is. To clean a lawn like that, is a whole summer's job. You've gotta rake it
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] and rake it and rake it.
[Josephine:] Then nobody else'll do it, so I've gotta do it.... And even if you dig it up... turn it over and start again... that moss is in it isn't it?
[Tina:] That's it. The seeds are there.... No I would say it's er... it's er bunging the ground up. It's not aerating the ground at all.... You know the... the air can't get into the ground... to let the grass grow. It'll just take over.... Have you got a book that tells you what to do?
[Josephine:] I dunno. I've gotta read about it.... Wednesday today.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] He's still up on the roof then.... he's been reading his horses.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Waiting to cross the road perhaps.
[Josephine:] Bloody hiding from somebody by the look of it.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Waiting to see if they've come out.
[Tina:] what's running on the two thirty... wants to be there in time.
[Josephine:] ... That's way down the road....
[Tina:] That's what I say, perhaps he's waiting to cross and come down here.
[Josephine:] Well he's got a long wait. [LAUGHTER] You haven't stood at the side of the pavement.... Mm mm.... Now if this bloody electric board is shut
[Tina:] Again. What does it
[Josephine:] Oh god damn no. I'll catch it now before it does.
[Tina:] Oh it is open.
[Josephine:] Yeah because you've gotta go
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] to the post office.... This ruddy thing. I'll be glad when they move it back.... It's not much help to anyone.
[Tina:] No,... You'll have to hurry he'll be shutting the door in a minute.
[Josephine:] Yeah hang on, I've gotta go to the gas board first....
[speaker002:] Okay... see you. . All the best now. Thank you. Enjoy it. I will. Bye now. Bye....
[Josephine:] to switch me off at the flat. Do you think you could switch me back on? I want some hot water to clean up
[speaker002:] Well it is a final account. One Chestnut Way?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] Yeah this is a final account.
[Josephine:] I've got no lights see.
[speaker002:] Pardon?
[Josephine:] I've got no lights out there. No
[speaker002:] No well you see you've finalized now. You took a final reading.... This is the final account, so that means that you've finished altogether with the property. If you go back in then
[Josephine:] I see
[speaker002:] and turn the supply back on
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] well whoever moves in then will have to pay, you know
[Josephine:] Mm.
[speaker002:] You'll have to sign back up for it if you're gonna use it.
[Josephine:] Well I've got no I can't get hot water to, to wash out you know, before I leave it. hand the keys back Monday you see?
[speaker002:] You shouldn't have taken a final reading until you left.
[Josephine:] I didn't I didn't
[speaker002:] This is a final. O A is final.
[Josephine:] Oh they must have done that then, the meters were in a room outside you see.
[speaker002:] Well somebody. I mean you don't
[Josephine:] No.
[speaker002:] The supply is still on there.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[speaker002:] So I mean there's no reason why you can't get hot water, it's just that erm it's just that with this it means that you've finalized it in your name. So whoever's going sign up for it. You'll have to fill in another form now.
[Josephine:] Well just have normal electric then I suppose.
[speaker002:] Well it's just, it isn't off, it's off, just off at the mains.
[Josephine:] Oh.
[speaker002:] the whole quarter.
[Josephine:] But there's no electricity at all, it's black see. Can't get lights or nothing on. So there must be something wrong.
[speaker002:] Yeah but they haven't been there to disconnect.
[Josephine:] No but I mean there must be something electrical, a fault, an electrical fault of something.
[speaker002:] Well you'll have to get in touch with the council.
[Josephine:] Yeah
[speaker002:] Alright? Because the
[Josephine:] Er a small loaf of bread please. Erm
[speaker002:] A tin, a cob or a batch?
[Josephine:] Now then...
[speaker002:] Now it's decision time, your choice.
[Josephine:] Erm batch I think. I haven't had one of them for a long time....
[speaker002:] It's make up your mind time.
[Josephine:] Yes. Fattening time, that's the trouble.... When you start you never stop with them.... Great, thanks.
[speaker002:] Thank you very much....
[Josephine:] Weather's getting better isn't it?
[speaker002:] Yes it is. Slowly but surely.
[Josephine:] Fine, as long as it comes.
[speaker002:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] End of the month and it'll be great. Ta ra
[speaker002:] Bye.
[Josephine:] Did you make a note on the day you posted?
[Tina:] I dunno. I might have done. I dunno.
[Josephine:] No... cos if I haven't heard in a fortnight you know you're not getting any in.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... Amelia what? Amy Johnson. Mm....
[Josephine:] Aerhart somebody.
[Tina:] Oh.... Mm
[Josephine:] Mm.... Aerhart... She's the woman before Amy Johnson.... She crashed....
[Tina:] Her. She didn't survive did she?...
[Josephine:] Amy Johnson did....
[Tina:] Tom Jones and oh... they've got a lot of old ones
[Josephine:] Alistair Sims.
[Tina:] Oh
[Josephine:] Save them making new.
[Tina:] Yes.... Save the money
[Josephine:] The kids of today haven't seen them.
[Tina:] Save the money, well they were better... things than what they get today.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] So maybe the the
[Josephine:] But the kids of today haven't seen them.
[Tina:] maybe the taste is going backwards.
[Josephine:] Mm. Well it does go round in circles they see don't they?...
[Tina:] There's Little John look.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] Ah well....
[Josephine:] Well it's been dry for another day....
[Tina:] [yawn]
[Josephine:] Oh christ
[Tina:] ?
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] ... You want a Brighton rats?
[Josephine:] Do you want to buy some rats.
[Tina:] Oh....
[Josephine:] To eat. She's hungry look....
[Tina:] Is there nothing better than that on?
[Josephine:] I don't know.... No
[Tina:] That's Africa....
[Josephine:] Rowan Atkinson.... [yawn] Ooh. We have gifts for mother's day from March the twenty ninth....
[Tina:] Where?...
[Josephine:] ... Ooh.
[Tina:] They don't tell you where do it?
[Josephine:] No....
[Tina:] Oh the National... the erm the Midland is joining up with
[Josephine:] With Japan.
[Tina:] with Japan and somewhere else now.
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] Well there's there's er... more Japanese trade done in this country than British, so...
[Josephine:] Mm.... So we've got no knitting.
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] No sewing.... I've got some mending....
[Tina:] Have you?
[Josephine:] Well, I've got to shorten my trousers....
[Tina:] [yawn] Have you made fit?
[Josephine:] Have I what?
[Tina:] You know, have you got to cut the bottoms off?
[Josephine:] Yeah. Well I dunno, yes, I think so. Yes. Too big. Cut the hem off anyway....
[Tina:] Africa again look.
[Josephine:] ... It's Malaysia.... Ooh....
[Tina:] Look at her eating corn.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] Vegetable market look.
[Josephine:] Look at the kite.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] What if that got tangled up in an aeroplane passing?
[Tina:] No, Yes, yes.... Aeroplanes... Oh they're used to it then....
[Josephine:] Oh what are they all cooking?...
[Tina:] sold in the shop I expect.
[Josephine:] the rubber trees is it?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Or...
[Tina:] Look there, he's just chipping round the bark. er sap out of the bark.... running out....
[Josephine:] Rubber.... That'd kill a tree won't it?
[Tina:] No. No.... They only just touch the bark, they don't cut the trees.
[Josephine:] Yeah but if you run the sap all out.
[Tina:] Well er the tree makes the sap. It's a rubber tree.
[Josephine:] It doesn't look like a rubber tree
[Tina:] Well it isn't it isn't rubber, it's just a resin that converts. It's converted to rubber.
[Josephine:] Yeah but it didn't look like a rubber tree.... Wonder if Margaret's packed?
[Tina:] No. Margaret packed? No....
[Josephine:] [yawn] Well who's she gonna get to pack?
[Tina:] I'm certain. John always used to, I don't know whether he's still
[Josephine:] John or Richard. But you never hear them er about them do you?
[Tina:] No, John is her... friend of er... oh I don't... friend of what's his name... her husband, Margaret's husband.
[Josephine:] Oh.
[Tina:] Harry....
[Josephine:] Does she ever see him now?
[Tina:] Occasionally. The they don't have anything er she won't talk to him. She, you know... but... time of day sort of thing, a few words. They live a good way apart.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] I oh a long long way apart. I think, I'm not sure... but he's down near erm... is it Los Angeles or er San Francisco?... very often. But they have met....
[Josephine:] Ooh... isn't it?
[Tina:] Mm. Chinese.... Don't hear much about China. And that's only what somebody, somebody has brought out and put together like. It's not er... official news....
[Josephine:] All got strange names haven't they?
[Tina:] That isn't er China is it? That's er Malaysia chiefly.
[Josephine:] Mm....
[Tina:] But it seems, according to him now, times are better in Malaysia....
[Josephine:] On the line [yawn]
[Tina:] And if they've got the fire on.
[Josephine:] And when it's cold it's bloody cold in there.
[Tina:] Oh well that's only in the night isn't it?
[Josephine:] Well that's when you want to put it on isn't it?
[Tina:] I mean er it isn't cold. It isn't cold here at night... in my room and my room is cold....
[Josephine:] Well it shouldn't be.
[Tina:] Well it is Jo. It's colder than, than you're room up there....
[Josephine:] Cos it's got thermal bricks on.
[Tina:] Oh well.
[Josephine:] And polystyrene lined.
[Tina:] Most places...
[Josephine:] There is a grey blanket missing....
[Tina:] Oh well you won't have them to wash will you?
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] You won't have them to wash will you?
[Josephine:] No.... [yawning] They've took the grey one [].
[Tina:] Anything I can do?...
[Josephine:] Not really.... And they didn't even paper and pencil.... Oh well.... More for the next time.... Anything exciting there?...
[Tina:] I don't know er... no not really. But er... no.... You can't really tell what's on the programme by the of them can you?...
[Josephine:] Not really....
[Tina:] High Road. Oh we can High Road at er... ten past five....
[Josephine:] And isn't there on in the afternoon as well?
[Tina:] Yeah.... And that's the lot I think.... They've a double page story of a... of a... er... Glenys er
[Josephine:] Kinnock?
[Tina:] Glenys Kinnock. Listen [reading] Russian officers were trying to sell four stolen nuclear artillery shells to Iran... for six million pounds each... a German T V station claimed [].
[Josephine:] They're desperate for money see.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] So they've gotta do it. And all these Russian scientists with, you know, sending up these... rockets in the air, they're going to go over to Iraq.
[Tina:] Course they are. Well if there isn't one way there's another, you know?...
[Josephine:] Iraq's got the money to pay them....
[Tina:] [reading] Crooked bosses can easily steal their workers' pension cash... MP's revealed in a shock report. They can exploit tax laws to raid benefits by design. Workers may also lose out through innocent... says the Commons Social Security Committee Report. The, the committee which has been probing... probing... the massive pensions theft by former Mirror publisher Robert Maxwell warns that this could be just the tip of the iceberg. Other schemes may not be as secure... as staff believe it says. The Committees urge the next government to bring in tough new pension laws [].
[Josephine:] Maggie's er fan was fired.
[Tina:] Anybody can... you know... di er diddle the pension laws. I mean like er Mark now, if he's paying in to pension for his firm, they can do what they like with it.
[Josephine:] Yeah?
[Tina:] And he hasn't got a say.... Well that's gotta be seen to.... [sigh]
[Josephine:] Mm.... [reading] Queen mum spots shamrock nut [].
[Tina:] Well look at it....
[Josephine:] Hm big old tufts round their hats isn't it?
[Tina:] Well look at that one....
[Josephine:] Oh it's down over his eyes. [LAUGHTER]...
[Tina:] He's... Well I think she's pretty silly to come and sit out there in the rain and disturb the... I suppose it it... perhaps it is under cover I suppose.
[Josephine:] No.... But er... The mo monster raving luny party
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] could have it's own television election.
[Tina:] Mm....
[Josephine:] He funds that all himself....
[Tina:] Oh and there's, there's a bit in there somewhere... where a lot of er the... the tory party... the tory central party, what do they call it?... Has been writing to big businesses for money to help their funds.... And it's... stuck it in the paper somewhere that er... Branson has given money and er... oh you know lots of other people in big business have given money. And they've not.... And er they're wanting their name taken off their lists.... They're tory members you see. They, you know they are members.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Paid up members. But they're wanting out of their business....
[Josephine:] And this erm... this was er announced over telly last night [reading] five thousand Brits were urged yesterday to leave Libya
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] because the United Nations considers plans to ban all flights to the arab country
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] because of the Lockerbie bombing []. Cos those men got away with it.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And he won't let them come here.... Oh I don't... this erm... Midland Bank, have you seen griffin's eyes? [LAUGHTER]...
[Tina:] The Hong Kong Bank wanted them to do that or something. Because in nineteen ninety... nineteen hundred and nine is it?... What's it now?
[Josephine:] Two.
[Tina:] Nineteen ninety nine... China's going to take over Hong Kong.... And that's why the Japs wanted the British in there.
[Josephine:] Mm. Did you see this er body on the bal balcony?... [reading] An old woman sat on a freezing balcony []
[Tina:] Oh yeah.... Where was that?
[Josephine:] Stockholm.
[Tina:] What?
[Josephine:] Stockholm.
[Tina:] Stockholm.... Stockholm is in Denmark I think.
[Josephine:] See Ian next door... shopping with him to.
[Tina:] I know... I know.
[Josephine:] Whether he's living with them!... Cos he isn't home as much as he used to be.
[Tina:] Is that the eldest one?
[Josephine:] Yeah.... He's only home at weekends.... I couldn't see a car.
[Tina:] Ooh, Christ it's cold!
[Josephine:] [sighing] Oh []!
[Tina:] A woman and her
[Josephine:] That's nice innit?
[Tina:] Mm.... A woman and her little girl... a tiny little girl, about four I should think.... I don't know what she wants to be....... she stuck the kid in the back of the car and... put the grocery in... and she picked her up and brought her into the front seat,ti, tied her in... and and the... the, the, the, this thing was coming about
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] you know?
[Josephine:] Oh yeah! She shouldn't
[Tina:] It was
[Josephine:] be there!
[Tina:] She was kicking her feet about!... She didn't like it anyway!
[Josephine:] Well perhaps there wasn't room for her sit in the back!... But you gotta make bloody room! You mustn't put them in the front!... You can be summons now for it!... [singing] mm mm... mm mm mm [].... Please don't change!
[Tina:] Oh!... Am I disturbing you?
[Josephine:] No.... Not at all!
[Tina:] It'll keep smaller than that when they're brushed.
[Josephine:] Ha!... Ah well!
[Tina:] [whistling]
[Josephine:] Been mowing the grass, yeah?
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Oh!... Tea bags!... I'll have to go back up!... Tea bags... and no veg!... And a light bulb.
[Tina:] That veg is too dear at Wrexham Davis isn't it?
[Josephine:] Oh it's rubbish!... It's dear and it's dying!... I've never seen nice veg there!... Major road works and Fishguard. The main street is closed.
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] Mm!... [singing] Mm mm... mm mm [].
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Mm!... It's a doctor.
[Tina:] He's been for.
[Josephine:] No,.... Unless he's got a monthly account and he keeps it in a book!... I doubt that very much!... It's his shopping list and all the bloody [LAUGHTER] curry things he needs []!... Are you coming in?... Mm.... What you lost?
[Tina:] My book mark.... I don't know, it went in the book.... But I couldn't find it.... He was driving a ruddy big Rover anyway! Oh ey
[Josephine:] So his wages is alright!... Paying him well!... Must be in the thing.... Can't see it.
[Tina:] no.... Perhaps it isn't there.... Where do I get the mud on these wheels?
[Josephine:] We might as well go rou, oh I don't know!... Will they chase us if we went in there.
[Tina:] Oh, somebody would, yes!... Someone got to have it....
[Josephine:] Ha?
[Tina:] You can't go through here can you?
[Josephine:] Mm. Yeah.... This stool, that's a nice big one!... Nice little coffee table!... Like that stool! Mm.... Look at this, phone table.... All your bits and pieces in the draws
[Tina:] Pieces and books.
[Josephine:] and close it.
[Tina:] In the draws.
[Josephine:] That's nice innit?... And this one goes into a table.... Nice!... Look at that!... That'll do, if anything.
[Tina:] Look at the price!
[Josephine:] Reduced to clear!... It was two thousand, one hundred.
[Tina:] They're nice!
[Josephine:] Oh, a nice seat there!... Do you wanna sit?
[Tina:] No.... and get out.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... I wanted to have a look at the price of their erm... Chanderel... Look at this little chair!... Ah, go on
[Tina:] What for?
[Josephine:] for knitting. Sit on him and try it.
[Tina:] Bit.
[Josephine:] Is it?
[Tina:] It is.
[Josephine:] Well, I dunno, you bounced into it didn't you?
[Tina:] Yeah but... if your behind was down in it.
[Josephine:] [sighing] Ha []!
[Tina:] Don't always do it like that.
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] It isn't really worth my.
[Josephine:] That's all your getting for it.... [singing] Mm mm, mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] the brown sugar isn't it? The caster sugar... try and get. Have you got any bags of dried fruit? Which one do you want? The large one No,.... No. Oh! Are you! Oh, well this is the wrong way am I? Oh!... Well that's... understandable. What about? Ah lovely!... Oh great!... Thank you very much.... A bit of bread It's alright. Thank you. What do you want?... Do you want currants? Oh that was nice! What? . Yeah. . Nope
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm [].... Anything exciting?
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Nope... That's it then.... That's it.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] What you got here then?... Hot prawn crackers.... Mm mm!
[Tina:] Sounds nice don't it?
[Josephine:] Mm, no thank you!... Hot prawns is a... prawn and curry.
[Tina:] and all sort of
[Josephine:] Yeah.... And they gone and got.... Oh, razor blades for Tony!
[Tina:] Oh dear!
[Josephine:] Erm
[Tina:] Got plants in there.
[Josephine:] Down here.... [whistling]... Rennies, Settlers.... Nope... Tesco's sell them.... I can't see any here either!
[Tina:] I don't know what to look for.
[Josephine:] Razor blades.... Never mind, we'll have a look in Tesco's.... No.... You get them in... Tesco's cheaper.... Mm.... [singing] Mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm []. There's your book marker.... All with tassels Please do not move them,.... Oh!
[Tina:] I don't know! I had it in the car to
[Josephine:] Mm, and you can't
[Tina:] took it in my hand and my pictures in the bag.
[Josephine:] That's a word search.
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] What is that then?
[Tina:] Oh God! A... paper slider and a
[Josephine:] That's innit?
[Tina:] Ha.... One thirty five.
[Josephine:] It's a word search.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm []. And Cilla's big day! [whistling] There's razor blades up there. They're not them though.
[Tina:] No... I don't know what you're looking for.
[Josephine:] Purple one it is.
[speaker002:] Ah.... Yeah alright then.... Thanks.... It is all there is it? Yeah.
[Josephine:] Or leave them in the trolley. You can leave them in the trolley.
[speaker002:] You, leave them there can you.... And then I can go across... across this
[Josephine:] Oh sorry!
[speaker002:] it's.... It's.
[Josephine:] Do you mean we have to get our trolley from outside?
[speaker002:] No, I'm not sure
[Josephine:] Sure?
[speaker002:] it'll be necessary........ Did you have this...?
[Josephine:] No, I did as a matter of fact. I was gonna look at the skeletons.... It's a waste of time.
[Tina:] Oh I don't know.
[speaker002:] Okay?
[Tina:] The moths
[speaker002:] Have you got?
[Josephine:] Mm.... They might.
[speaker002:] You want the pate anyway? Yes.
[Josephine:] Shall I go and have a look and [tannoy] Shall I?... I'll come for this okay?
[speaker002:] Yeah, okay.
[Josephine:] There was er powdered, you can buy anything now!... What's that?
[Tina:] Home cook book.... Prime Minister... down.
[speaker002:] You'll have to wait... soup. Oh I opened a fresh one.
[Josephine:] [sighing] Oh []!... The film, look!
[Tina:] That's a picture innit?
[Josephine:] Well I have seen it there.... But I don't what price it is.
[Tina:] Mm.... Dark, rich blooded, it's a wa... waste of innit?
[Josephine:] Well what can I do?... It's going to rot altogether! What the hell we got here?... Lilies, of assortment.... Would they that?
[Tina:] Oh, yeah false... ro... rockery plants
[Josephine:] Look at these little tiny things!... Alpine.... Ah ha!
[Tina:] They want a damn good touch!
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] They want huge or something.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Well it's only a tiny box []! What did she want her epsom salts for? I've seen that
[Tina:] It
[Josephine:] .
[Tina:] What else you got there?
[Josephine:] It's for the garden.
[Tina:] Give it the horses they
[Josephine:] No, it's for the garden.... Here!... It's in these boxes here.... Somewhere.
[Tina:] But these are plant killers!
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] This is fertiliser... for strong leaf growth.
[Josephine:] See this is one I've put on.
[Tina:] They're wedged in.
[Josephine:] Lawn sand controls moss for a beautiful lawn.
[Tina:] That controls it.... Ah, that'll kill it.... Moss killer!....... See... it kills moss in minutes. Prevents it for months!... Once, one treatment lasts all the season.... Rapidly greens up the lawn.... This effect lasts... for about four weeks!
[Josephine:] No, that's eight pound... in four weeks.
[Tina:] Every four weeks, yeah.... The best thing is to cut it all off and just put... it means we've gotta get a bit more soil and a bit covered, to pull it off.
[Josephine:] See this... use at any time... and repeat as required for... treat in the autumn or the spring.... It doesn't say. Quickly kills moss, algae and lichen on lawns, paths, fences and.... Helps to control diseases on lawns.... A little bottle.... Apply... over... twe, twenty five foot, square feet... how much is twenty five square?... What is that front lawn? About a hundred square feet?... Sure to be.... We want two of these. No, I wouldn't say that!
[Tina:] Oh, yes it's nothing!... Hundred square feet is nothing!... I thought it's a hundred but it... it's getting on.... More than fifty.
[Josephine:] Oh they're all bloody disgusting aren't they?
[Tina:] They will be!
[Josephine:] Mm.... A second application may be necessary after one month to control the more stubborn weeds.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] It don't say moss!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Moss, a bloody thing on it's own!
[Tina:] It's not, that's a lawn food and weed killer.... Yes.
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] Yes, it is moss killer, look.
[Josephine:] Mm.... But this is debris.
[Tina:] Mm.... Here you are... for best results... treat autumn or spring.... Now is the time then.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... No, I'll get some of that sand and throw on it first.... Why should I waste my money!... It's gotta be done....?... Ah?
[Tina:] I think there's no other way would... take it off and.... You've gotta treat the soil after.
[Josephine:] Well... I dunno. How would you put the paving stones down?
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] You have to put.... Well... yes.... You could leave a hole in the middle... to put a plant or a tree or something in it. You fill the middle bit with
[Josephine:] Ah, that's it.... Isn't it?
[Tina:] I think so.... Mm, I glass, look!
[Josephine:] Mm.... It's expensive glass!... Nice up there!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] This is Darlington glass!... That is nine fifty.
[Tina:] Oh!... Oh yes, this one?
[Josephine:] Eight fifty.
[Tina:] No.... It wasn't.
[Josephine:] Oh no!
[Tina:] it isn't the same.
[Josephine:] Yeah well, the three there.
[Tina:] ... here... like this one here.
[Josephine:] Eight fifty is on the end down there.... Ah well!... Dan isn't so bothered about it!... Is he?
[Tina:] Ah?
[Josephine:] He isn't so bothered about it!
[Tina:] Well he's sure he wouldn't spend that money!... Very silly of him in the first place!
[Josephine:] Who... Dan?
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] No, before I got there.
[Tina:] I'll get these.
[speaker002:] Thirty five... six pound
[Tina:] Oh, thirty!
[Josephine:] Thirty, yeah.
[Tina:] Fifty.
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... One forty eight.
[speaker002:] There we are!... Many thanks!
[Josephine:] Great!
[speaker002:] ... very much.
[Josephine:] You don't er... sell er... Gillette razors the ba erm
[speaker002:] What sort of razor have you got?
[Josephine:] Oh, mark two. No, I think you've got the plus there haven't you?
[speaker002:] .
[Josephine:] Yeah, right.
[speaker002:] Sorry!
[Josephine:] Thanks.... Changed the shop window again!
[Tina:] Mm.
[speaker002:] You going upstairs again? [LAUGHTER] I don't know, []! I don't know!... I buy you a quick
[Tina:] A... for me.
[Josephine:] .
[Tina:] Ah?... What?
[Josephine:] He's come down off........ They're all coming down off the bloody erm....
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Josephine:] All come off.
[Tina:] Which is the nearest?
[Josephine:] Like meeting at the market!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] isn't it?
[Tina:] Going to the market.
[Josephine:] Oh!... God that wind's gone cold!
[Tina:] I say that's a draft [LAUGHTER] coming across us []!
[Josephine:] Mm!... See that man.
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] Doctor.... He's aneis... anaesthetist
[Tina:] Oh.... Oh God have knocked across!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm, mm mm mm mm mm [].... Oh!
[Tina:] It is cold!... Innit?
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm [].... Porgh
[Tina:] Oh, look at this!
[Josephine:] I'll erm... it'll be cheaper to go and two bags of bloody sand!... And throw it on.
[Tina:] But that won't kill it!.
[Josephine:] No, it drains it, see.
[Tina:] Ah.... How does it drain it?
[Josephine:] Makes the ground too dry for it to grow on.
[Tina:] You're wasting your money!...... and get this... the grass, the moss through.... It's a devil of a thing, moss!
[Josephine:] I knew those bloody people!
[Tina:] Oh ey... Yeah, they were new ones.
[Josephine:] I didn't think he would! I don't know why!
[Tina:] Well he don't know anything about gardening, you see!
[Josephine:] But I bloody would!
[Tina:] And, and Lincolnshire, now just think... Lincolnshire... is a county full of woods... it, it's a
[Josephine:] What's that gotta do with it?
[Tina:] It's in the New Forest.... It's a... full and full of, full of woods!
[Josephine:] What's Lincolnshire gotta do with it?
[Tina:] Because he says it's Lincolnshire!
[Josephine:] No, he didn't! He said it's Nottingham!
[Tina:] He... Oh!... Nottingham.
[Josephine:] And you buy Nottingham grass seed.... And grow your own turfs.
[Tina:] I don't know... about the.... And I thought they're no... woods... forest.... Robin
[Josephine:] Nottingham!
[Tina:] Hood's forest, innit? Lincolnshire.
[Josephine:] Nottingham!... Sherwood Forest... is in Nottingham!
[Tina:] I said I think it's forest innit?
[Josephine:] But it's in Nottingham!
[Tina:] Oh yes, well
[Josephine:] But you buy the seed! Grass seed!... Nottingham seed.
[Tina:] Yeah, well that's grown special, for the seed.... But this is, evidently out of somebody's own wood. You cut down two trees and the... the grass has been left and they... took advantage of the bit that was there.... Where did he get the address from? The... the... you know
[Josephine:] I don't know! Out the
[Tina:] recommendation?
[Josephine:] paper I think!
[Tina:] Oh yes!
[Josephine:] In Camarvon... The only thing is, see what I'm scared of now, you go and put the mower in there... and cart it out the back... and the... bits of moss dropping off the mower onto that patch!
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] So you've spread it!... It'll be front and back!
[Tina:] Mm.... Those tiles... square.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Like the man next door. But I think they're about three pounds each!... The last I heard of them.... I don't know what they are now.
[Josephine:] Yeah, but in places you can have them a pound!
[Tina:] Yeah.... Well, when we had them... they were a pound each.... That's a very long time ago!... And I think David had some... er
[Josephine:] He bought the coloured ones.
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] They're dearer.
[Tina:] And they were three pounds each.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... But on the way to Chearell arket... they're a pound each!
[Tina:] And would you want... about four or five dozen? More than that perhaps?
[Josephine:] I don't know, I might.
[Tina:] But the width of the thing.... About four foot wide isn't it?
[Josephine:] Not a clue!
[Tina:] No, nor me.... I'd say about four by... six... eight, perhaps?... So that's, four eights are thirty two, to say the least.
[Josephine:] Mm!... Ah, ha ha ha... ha ha ha!
[Tina:] Oh, I say! Look at that sultry lot!... Up there.
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] Him and her sat on the fence, the... they're slobbering away!... What's on up here then?
[Josephine:] They're pulling the scaffolding down and Susan, it's bloody month too late! [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [sighing] Oh []!... [singing] Mm mm mm mm, mm mm mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm [].
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm []
[Tina:] Oh, shall we go to the job centre?
[Josephine:] I don't think it's worth it!
[Tina:] See what's going.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] Oh, Woolworths.... What have they got there? Glasses. Oh look,.
[Josephine:] Well... what's going on here?
[Tina:] Well what is that going on up there?... At the roundabout.
[Josephine:] It's a ruddy dustbin lorry!
[Tina:] Roundabout's there.
[Josephine:] Yeah, I think I'll go this way too.... And now you'll find the same up this bloody way or something!... Stupid!... Ha ha ha ha!... Mm mm!... [singing] Mm mm mm mm
[Tina:] Posh shops up here! Showing their corsets
[Josephine:] mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] and their underwear!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm
[Tina:] And the family butcher got not meat!
[Josephine:] mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] Oh, some lovely walking sticks! Ooh!... Yum yum!
[Josephine:] Shop full.
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm, mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm
[Tina:] Gees that bloody car frightened me then!
[Josephine:] mm mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] It's a wonder they don't make a car port here... you know?
[Josephine:] This is bloody ridiculous! What we've got here now?... Oh they're surveying.... Has that little house gotta come down?
[Tina:] No, they're doing it up.... Oh, they're gonna cut that corner off I think, by the look of it.
[Josephine:] Lose part of the garden or something.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Look at those paving slabs, we'll have to take one of them away today.
[Tina:] one a night!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Have one a week!
[Josephine:] Oh!... [singing] Ah ha ha ha [].... God, the hospital's gone!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Flats.... All in here, see them?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Gone.
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Pity!
[Tina:] These little towns
[Josephine:] What a ruddy way to come and avoid that bloody street, isn't it?
[Tina:] are so old... and maybe, so many and all... drains and this and that, and the next thing!...!
[Josephine:] Watch that bloody dustbin [LAUGHTER] lorry come in here now!
[Tina:] It's er... i, it's like a... jigsaw now isn't it?
[Josephine:] Mm mm!... What are we going here for?
[Tina:] Vegetables.
[Josephine:] Veg.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm []... Oh God, I hate this! Well for a Thursday, look at the car park!... Mm?
[Tina:] Not many about is there?
[Josephine:] There's a lot more in Quicksave!... Yeah?... I bet they have seen a change only he wouldn't admit it, if they did!
[Tina:] Mm.... Cos Leo's and all has come on.
[Josephine:] Yeah.... That's down in the town, see.... Do your shopping, then go round the shops there!... But this is up out of the way!... I bet they have seen a change!... Yeah, they'll never admit to you!
[Tina:] No, well you see they'll it in their annual returns.... But er... it doesn't get put in the paper... you know... individually.... It's just, you know,s, so many million less this year, than last year!... That's all, you know.
[Josephine:] Mm.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm [].... Oh Christ! This is getting closer!
[Tina:] That'll do!... Go on!
[Josephine:] Oh, and I've gotta go to Weslicks after this!
[Tina:] Gotta go where?
[Josephine:] Weslicks... [singing] Mm mm mm mm [].... Yes please. Mhm.... Hark at that dog! Just to knock your hand in.
[Tina:] the dole brings you to.
[Josephine:] Does!
[Tina:] Oh?
[Josephine:] No problem!... Well I can say it's Ally's car!... Does! You've got to use whatever you put your hands on!
[Tina:] I mean it isn't... it isn't necessarily the goal!... I mean if you've got your house on a mortgage and you're on the dole, takes all your money too!
[Josephine:] Everything!
[Tina:] There's, there's nothing left for anything other than to eat!... That, that you've earnt like!
[Josephine:] That's right!
[Tina:] I noticed that there was only one man, that's all I heard of.... Er er... really attacking the, the... the poor people!... Not, attacking them, standing up for them!... Er... how did he expect the poor the people to live and... pay mortgage and... er, you know... all this and that on dole money!
[Josephine:] Side, you can't choose anything!... You've
[Tina:] No!
[Josephine:] gotta have what you've got and that's it!
[Tina:] And everybody is at risk of employment!... Which is... either business... side of
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] it... and, and there was one, like a... why all this er... er er oh, why are the schools so bad? And why are the... hospitals so bad? And, why is everything so bad?... But they're not! They're not, he kept saying! They're not! We've just given them so much bloody... and if your houses are in bad condition... go to your council!
[Josephine:] Ey if you've got a council house, it would be wouldn't it?
[Tina:] Ey go to your councils! They have the money!
[Josephine:] But they're not interested in the ones who've bought!
[Tina:] Yes, it was all nonsense he was talking about it! He was covering up all the time!
[Josephine:] Covering himself!... Just saying something to pass it over!
[Tina:] Yeah. Cos it was only on the telephones, you couldn't see the!
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] But this one man did give him Rule Britannia, and got him... all taking the same time as him!... Didn't know what anybody was talking about!
[Josephine:] Mm!... Be glad when it's all over!... Every time you hear the word election, you start to cringe!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] And will do!
[Josephine:] Ey... That's a Jewson bus, look!
[Tina:] Is it?
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Looks as though he ought to be []!
[Tina:] Ooh I say, got the caravan in front of the house there!
[Josephine:] Living, living in that till the house gets built!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] When their house is finished, they'll sell that!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] To somebody else then who wants to live in it just till it's built!... They might keep it in the garden and have it as bed and breakfast!
[Tina:] It only needs that heater on... don't it?
[Josephine:] It's warmed the car up.
[Tina:] Oh, I saw Mrs!
[Josephine:] Did you?
[Tina:] Ey she looked... with the red scarf who's been having problems with it!
[Josephine:] Yeah?
[Tina:] Well... she went... she'd left him... with their baggages on the seat... at the front of the shop
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] and she went across the road for something... and while she was across the road Mrs came and was talking to that man.
[Josephine:] Did she see you?
[Tina:] No.... She was er er... she was really Mrs... she was in a tearing hurry!... You know, never
[Josephine:] Well I'd have stopped her! I'd have er
[Tina:] Oh, she didn't know!
[Josephine:] to find out who's about
[Tina:] But she was
[Josephine:] this!
[Tina:] talking oh... she was talking with him, so it's rude to interrupt like that!... And always, before she'd talked, finished talking to him she was off on down the road.... But it was her, and I was thinking after... she's sure to have retired now.
[Josephine:] Oh I dunno!
[Tina:] She will be retired when she's forty, see!
[Josephine:] Why?
[Tina:] There's six behind her
[Josephine:] She can go on till she's sixty five!
[Tina:] I don't think so!
[Josephine:] But she's the breadwinner!
[Tina:] Well I think he's getting the, you know?... She can't leave him or something like that, maybe?... She told, she told dad she didn't want to give up work!... She should hate the day when... she... a, hadn't got a job to go to!
[Josephine:] Yeah well, don't forget now she's on her way back to school, see!
[Tina:] Oh I dunno!... She might be but er... she'd got the same red skirt on as she had... she were wearing... when we were there!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] She didn't look quite as natty as she usually does! But, of course, it might be an... off day on her!... With the wind, the wind blowing.
[Josephine:] Ah!
[Tina:] But it was Mrs alright!... The he was very good... you know, he was quiet and peaceful.... Didn't disturb anybody! Not do anything, but still... you can't depend on that can you?
[Josephine:] The daffs there!
[Tina:] Yeah.... They're beginning to fall all o, now.
[Josephine:] Mm.... But they haven't had much sunshine really!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] A ruddy mess outside your door innit?
[Tina:] Mm mm.
[Josephine:] See this woman? She walks up to the shop here! She don't go to Busters I don't know why?... It's a Polish woman.
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Well they're probably cheaper!
[Josephine:] Oh I see.... Perhaps it is. Well the milk is!
[Tina:] I don't know what the
[Josephine:] So probably she coming up
[Tina:] I
[Josephine:] for her milk!
[Tina:] I don't know! What about the groceries?
[Josephine:] And it's exercise for the dog, see?
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] No, but her daily milk is a big difference! Thirty three
[Tina:] Oh yes.
[Josephine:] to twenty six!
[Tina:] But I don't know! What about her groceries being cheaper, and that is... in the long run!... But er
[Josephine:] No, but if, if she had her milk there every day!
[Tina:] And her veg there!... Cos they grow a lot of veg in there!
[Josephine:] It's exercising the dog!... And it's cheaper!
[Tina:] Oh, look at the greens!
[Josephine:] Willows.... Pussy willows coming out!
[Tina:] No, I think it's all gone innit?
[Josephine:] These are, yeah.
[Tina:] ... yeah.
[Josephine:] It was pussy willows all back there.
[Tina:] Yeah.... Couple of.
[Josephine:] It's gonna rain!
[Tina:] Oh if we're, we're coming.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm [].... Well I wonder, did Mark enjoy his days work?
[Tina:] He said so.... Oh, what's he doing?
[Josephine:] Yesterday!... He was working!
[Tina:] Oh!... Said he was enjoying his holidays!
[Josephine:] Mark would there! On his own, he'd love it!... He would like it better if Sally wasn't there!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] But he said it's make it awkward! Sally has holiday on her own but she can't... go about.
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] As er, she can go if... they won't let Kirsty in, she can go one night, he can go another night.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] It's a change, but er... it's a change to have somebody to talk to as well!... isn't it?
[Tina:] But will he?... Even if it's
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] next door innit?... The way of life is different for a
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] week.
[Josephine:] Oh well they'll be no cooking! And she'll make him bloody wash up!
[Tina:] Will she?
[Josephine:] Oh, he'll have to do his whack there!... [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!... Sally won't let him get away with it!
[Tina:] Oh, whatever's on the road!
[Josephine:] Paper bag.... Yes, he'll have to make his beds and he does his share of the cooking and all!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] All the way.... Half and half.... But even, you know,e, even if they go for a walk into to Tenby, it's company!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] But Mark... would like to do it without the company!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Sally would like that bit of company. Well she's on her own all the time, see!
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] What the hell is... Oh tractor!... Ooh!
[Tina:] I don't know what's going on down there.
[Josephine:] Oh, surveying.... They're starting the dig out. It's coming up for Easter, see?
[Tina:] Oh yes.
[Josephine:] They're all ready! And where they're gonna go, and what part are they gonna do!
[Tina:] Is that the old erm... er... map there, sort of?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] So they know where the buildings were.... Mm mm mm.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... ah ha ha ha... ha ha ha ha [].
[Tina:] Got that little... corner there.... Little greenery around that corner.... It's all dandelions!... Great long-uns
[Josephine:] Yeah but get that
[Tina:] like this!
[Josephine:] Let a tortoise loose in there for an hour or two.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm... ha mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... ha ha ha ha... mm mm mm mm... mm mm... ha ha hum []... Some daffs all the way up.
[Tina:] Yeah, but they're so white aren't they?
[Josephine:] Yeah.... Well, better than nothing at all!
[Tina:] Funny way they get them all the way out to the other side!
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] The flowers all up on that side of the road. There's some here look!... On the bank.
[Josephine:] This is the new part, see?... That other part the bank is the old part!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] I expect there's... there's bushes all here, see?... They'll all fill in, just now.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm []. Look at him digging a bag of bones somewhere!
[Tina:] .
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] .
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Oh God!... Ha ha!
[Tina:] Oh I say!... [LAUGHTER] She don't know which end her coat is at []!
[Josephine:] Well it's a tatty looking coat anyway!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] [singing] Ah ha ha ha [].
[Tina:] Have you got much shopping to do?
[Josephine:] Not a lot.
[Tina:] Well I pay for the copper!
[Josephine:] Where are the vegetable pies?
[speaker002:] Vegetarian?... That's just pasties.
[Josephine:] I'll have one of those then please?... You haven't got the corned beef?
[speaker002:] You want corned beef?... Yes... at the top there.
[Josephine:] These?... One... oh can I have lightly baked one?
[speaker002:] Alright?
[Josephine:] Good!
[speaker002:] ... Okay?
[Josephine:] Fine.
[Tina:] Ah, two well baked loaves please? And... I think,.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm... mm... mm [].
[speaker002:] Three twenty.
[Tina:] Here you are.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm [].... Hiya
[speaker002:] Hiya!
[Josephine:] It's horrible, this job shopping innit! [LAUGHTER]... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm []... Gonna switch this off.
[speaker002:] Three pound and three please?... Three's five ten, and ten is twenty. Thank you.
[Josephine:] Thank you. They know in their in their own fashion don't they?
[speaker002:] They're up there!... They're up there love!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] Do you want a cup of tea?
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker002:] ... Here love, come... puff pastry.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Give me that one.......... Do you want them?...!....... Gone away!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Yes! No! I won't!... I won't forget!... Chocolate.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Do you want a cup of tea? No I... No idea!... The other thing. But I need them! I'll get four chips with them.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... Oh!....
[speaker002:] Tins of baked beans love! [bell ring] One.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm, mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm []. Yeah.... [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm, mm mm mm... mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm, mm mm... mm mm, mm mm... mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm, mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm... mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Oh stop it!... Get off the ground! Would you please stop! ...!... You're not!... Big fat! Yep!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Oh that bloke's a real! [bell ring]
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm... mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm
[speaker002:] Don't no one look!... Oops! [bell ring]
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm [].
[speaker002:] Excuse me! Have you got the time on you please?
[Josephine:] No.... Erm...
[speaker002:] Cos I... I got a watch and it says... five past twelve, but it's more than that!
[Josephine:] Yes
[speaker002:] Because we
[Josephine:] I think it's more than that!
[speaker002:] Yeah, I put wrong I think, yeah.
[Josephine:] No, sorry!
[Tina:] And she was born into it.... Her father, you know?... Into high society in then.
[Josephine:] Oh well!... The thing is... what's she doing with all these bloody skiing holidays for?... Then she's not learn what she's gotta do!
[Danny:] Oh God I just about it!... The pressure... of the work. The Queen in other words... expects too much... of them!... And she might come at you very... very...... but.... She's taking too much out of them!.... This is what the people are saying.
[Tina:] It isn't too much Danny!... She isn't doing... enough!... You know, she's living too wild a life!
[Josephine:] Too wild a life!... They're not knuckling her down to concentrate!
[Tina:] You know, they have to go and... speak at meetings, and shake hands with everybody
[Danny:] I know!
[Tina:] and all that,!... And she'd rather jump on a pony and go!
[Josephine:] Because the Queen Mother... isn't.
[Danny:] Well I saw........ Yeah.... What's his name?
[Tina:] Wesley?
[Danny:] No.... I'll come to it.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] He's, fooled her twice today.... I had to, the second the time... only after... the bloody!... I thought I recognised the voice... I says, you got the wrong number pal!... I'm sorry sir, he said!... He said I didn't want to bother you........ Well!... And he would ring off.... And I put the phone down as well.
[Josephine:] Well, did you ask to go to the?
[Danny:] He said hello Mr.
[Josephine:] Well, he had the right number then didn't he?
[Danny:] I didn't say it!... I asked him if he had the right... number?... I didn't know who he was!... Then he said the same.
[Josephine:] Oh!
[Tina:] I suppose he thought he was talking to Sally.
[Danny:] Oh!....... I didn't.
[Josephine:] Mm mm!... He didn't say what he wanted?
[Danny:] No! I didn't ask him!... Cos I thought... that he had the wrong number!... I didn't know who bloody Wesley was!... I didn't know his name!
[Josephine:] Could of asked him!
[Danny:] Well he bloody said but... but I didn't know him!... Never mind!... All I've been introduced to that bloke as... Sally's... friend!... I've never been!... So how was I to know?
[Josephine:] ... [sighing] Oh []! Mm?
[Tina:] There wasn't much in that magazine.
[Josephine:] Got your car though.
[Tina:] It's cold isn't it?
[Josephine:] Soon know.
[Tina:] The Queen... the Royal Family get paid in this.
[Danny:] Well the solicitors... do.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] The Queen's supposed to know.... It's where I get
[Tina:] though.... But Andrew will have to keep the children.
[Danny:] Well they want, they want divorce and they'd rather custody of the children... and if they'll some... but she can allow them to take the children away cos the... well the media coverage, they've obviously got... they have a law.... Cos they don't know whether she's going to America... or Australia.... The to her.... Her mother's in America... and her sister's in Australia.... Her sister is... parted from her husband... went through a divorce so,
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] Catherine.... But two cars took her out against...... and they believe that... she's gone to the airport and... they didn't know where... where she was excised.... Ah?
[Tina:] They wanted Texas where her father... her mother lives.
[Danny:] Yeah, her father's dead,... two years ago.... Where it says step-father.
[Josephine:] You wouldn't recognise him!
[Danny:] Oh yeah........ This reporter's saying that... it's her mother's,yo, you'll see!... she married.
[Tina:] And they said that the one in Australia, her sister in Australia wouldn't tolerate it!
[Danny:] No, but it's... what they're saying to Fergie, is just go!... Get away from it all.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Danny:] Because the media... they will not give her peace!... The... and all the crowds.... There's hundred weren't there!... All the time!
[Tina:] Even the... police cars are there!
[Danny:] The police can't bloody move unless... to her!... There's something there!... They, they can't er... restore it up... where there isn't any!
[Tina:] I know.... And they're looking for the first little thing!
[Danny:] Oh!
[Josephine:] I mean, now... you get... big money for the first story!
[Tina:] Ey it's like that one from America
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] offered her work.
[Josephine:] Two million!
[Tina:] Two million dollars, for her!
[Josephine:] Get out of my bloody shoes, Mick!
[Tina:] I'll, I'll laugh... laugh if you like that magazines or something.
[Josephine:] Tough luck!
[Tina:] Ey
[Josephine:] They ain't going for them!... Tough luck!
[Danny:] ... Probably end up getting.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm []... Now we've started.... No, well... it's their problem!
[Tina:] It's the husband, it's the kids that suffer anyway!
[Danny:] That's right.
[Josephine:] Well they won't!
[Tina:] Oh they will, mind, they'll want to know where their daddy is, and why he doesn't come!
[Josephine:] Yes... but I suppose if you get custody... holidays... they can afford the best of everything!
[Tina:] Mm!... Tap dripping.
[Josephine:] .... Time for a dog's bowl!
[Tina:] Can you put some of them scraps in it?
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Tina:] It's four o'clock!... You'll have it... on, on her.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Told you he wouldn't, didn't come.
[Josephine:] He didn't come!... Nope
[Danny:] Ah, well that's you then cut out mum!
[Tina:] Ey...!
[Danny:] You won't keep, you'll get whole book!
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mm mm mm... mm mm mm mm mm [].
[Tina:] rung.
[Danny:] bloke.....
[Josephine:] Bet she was really.
[Danny:] Ah,.... I didn't know... the bloody blokes name!... I happened to have it, the phone use his hands.... It could of been Sally's friend.
[Josephine:] But you could ask, who are you... who are you looking for?
[Danny:] Yes.... I know what's really cutting her up about too... is very near... I didn't know what to... what to do.... Get that the paper out today?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] Where is it?
[Josephine:] Well I don't, there's been her and Lisa!
[Tina:] I thought we should of... nicked that lot!
[Josephine:] That's about quarter of an hour isn't it?
[Danny:] That was the last one.
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] Well that one looks twenty er... the wash basin in it.
[Josephine:] That's too much... going on too long!... It's either the shower or
[Danny:] Now it's your wash basin!... I heard him shouting at it.... I was there last night.... Before she ran into the... wash basin.... Come on, where do you leave the paper?
[Josephine:] What?
[Danny:] Read the paper.... Have a look at all the pages.
[Josephine:] What erm... what time did he ring?
[Danny:] About one, two o'clock.
[Josephine:] And why does he sit in her house waiting for her?
[Danny:] Well it's on his way home.... Private home.... It is a private number... it wasn't a phone box....... I didn't know the bloke by his name! I didn't know who I was talking to!
[Josephine:] You should of asked!
[Danny:] [shouting] I did! He said ra []... Jesus Christ! I'm talking to a wall!
[Josephine:] And, what's her number?
[Danny:] .
[Josephine:] Doing a fine job!
[Tina:] Are you? What in?
[Josephine:] Polish! Polish! Polish!
[Tina:] Oh!
[Josephine:] Must make a Friday, a Polish day.
[Tina:] A what?
[Josephine:] A polish day.... [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Right.
[Josephine:] Even just to... wipe the polish round
[Tina:] No, it's, yes.
[Josephine:] And then you, you
[Tina:] You polish them.... Well you're supposed
[Josephine:] You went on Monday
[Tina:] you're supposed to give it a good bees waxing once a year!... The rest of the time you, you... you warm the polish rag and rub that over.... And then I, I,
[Josephine:] Have you done the radiator?
[Tina:] hard rubbing... is the... secret of it all.
[Josephine:] And we've done the window sills all upstairs.
[Tina:] And it absorbs it don't it?
[Josephine:] I put a good bit on there and soaked it... let it soak in.... as if you would... have a polish day every Friday... you could put it on... Thursday night.
[Tina:] You don't want to put it on early but
[Josephine:] And polish it off
[Tina:] If you
[Josephine:] Friday.
[Tina:] Yes... but you see... if you put a lot on it's sticky!
[Josephine:] Oh yeah.
[Tina:] You gotta keep them, you know?
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Rubbing it ahead with a duster will do for... weeks!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Oh are going through the hoop!... It is erm... a fact... boys pour your money into BUPA bank robbed.... And they
[Josephine:] put it in, if he's
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] going.
[Tina:] Yeah.... And it says a,i,i... it's stating things here... er... if you've been wanted operation a long time... the N S H... er... N S H... that is it, yes.
[Josephine:] N H S.
[Tina:] N H S... they will re transfer your name to Bupa... and Bupa will write to you... and say they've got a bed if you'd like to have it.... Because you've gotta pay for that.
[Josephine:] Danny could have had his operation three years ago!
[Tina:] If you'd been on Bupa.
[Josephine:] The first thing they asked him was how much money he'd got!
[Tina:] Yes.
[Josephine:] And, do you belong to Bupa?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And he said, how the hell can I pay that!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] And they said well it's.
[Tina:] Well... in... in nineteen seventy nine... before the Tories, there was only one Bupa hospital.
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Now there are thirty!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] And another fact is, last year... Bupa announced record losses... of sixty three point three million!... Fact... the Department of Social Security... is splashing five million for health cheques... for it's staff... all on Bupa!
[Josephine:] Mm.... To keep the private one going!
[Tina:] Prime Mist... Prime Minister Major spoke last year... at a nurses awards dinner organised by Bupa... he said there was now much more scope... for private health firms.... A, Health Secretary William Waldegrave is a member of BUPA.... That's the Health Secretary!
[Josephine:] Mm!... But if you listen to him on telly, he isn't!
[Tina:] Oh well.... No.... Course I er... the main subject today is the pot calling the kettle black!
[Josephine:] Mm.... M F I, sixty five percent off look!
[Tina:] Mm.... [reading newspaper] Elderly patients cower in terror as two nurses battle it out on a ward!... A tribunal heard yesterday.... Tempers exploded at breakfast time after Rosemary... and Carssier...... who had feuded for a month accidentally bumped into each other between two beds... and their slanging match to violence... when Rosemary shouted... what you need is a man!... Bed ridden patients at St Mary's A... St Mary Abbots Hospital... are geriatric and... and psychiatric unit in London's Kensington... narrowly escaped injured... injury as five foot two... Carssier... grappled with Rosemary... six foot and well stoned!... And it was Rosemary who finished... up in casualty after Carssier kicked her three times in the stomach!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] The ides... industrial tribunal in Chelsea was... the fight ended only when they were pulled apart... by the angry matron!... Rosemary, twenty eight, claimed... that Carssier grabbed a patient's... organ... no... angry Rosemary, twenty eight, claimed that Carssier grabbed a patient's orange juice... threw it over her and kicked her!... But Carssier thirty two... insisted she only tried to defend herself after Rosemary repeatedly punched her!... Rosemary who had a caesarian operation just four months earlier, said... she did not touch Carssier... She told the tribunal, just look at me!... If I had touched her it might have been a very different thing!... Simon, ex-manager of St Mary's... Mary Abbots, said... the safety of patients was put at risk!... Cassier of Notting Hill... so she's a black-un!... [reading] Was sacked by Riverside Health Authorities... after disciplinary hearing.... She claims unfair dismissal [].
[Josephine:] Cassier's the white one!
[Tina:] Oh yeah.
[Josephine:] From Notting Hill.
[Tina:] [reading] She claims unfair dismissal... and the case continues [].... So... Mm!... Oh, [reading] Cilla Black... met Mickey Mouse yesterday... and the excited scouse laughed!... Put on a pair of Mickey Mouse ears for the occasion.... But it was easy to tell the stars apart... Mickey was the one who could open his mouth and smile without looking like Goofy []!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] [reading] He got together with the T V presenter... when she opened a half size replica... of Sleeping Beauty's castle at Battersea Park, in London... the castle, giving visitors... a preview of the Euro-Disney Centre... which opens near Paris... on April the twelfth.
[Josephine:] See they're still saying April the twelfth.
[Tina:] Will stay at the park until Sunday... before moving on to Birmingham and Manchester []....... Oh yes, well I dare say isn't finished!... It might be finished all but from painting and... you know?... Extra trimmings. I mean, they're working there forever and a day!... [reading newspaper] Fergies twenty million kiss-off.... The Duchess of York... will be ordered to [].... It was I, it was in the book, Fergie and.
[Josephine:] She can't do it!... She can't do it!... But if she opens it... gonna take her to the cleaners!
[Tina:] She'll get the house if... [reading] The Sunnin... Sunninghill... the five million house, built... for the couple... at the Queen's expense... will remain Fergie's home for the... foreseeable future.... The Queen who gave it to Andy and Fergie as a wedding present... has made it clear to her advisors... that the Duchess should not be forced to leave, as long as the... she adheres to her agreement... not to talk about the marriage break up [].... But, a broke up's a broke up, innit?
[Josephine:] Well she's been talking hasn't she?
[Tina:] [reading] The decision means the children will remain physically close to the queen... and Princess Beatrice will be able to remain at the same school.... The house is not regarded as a ac... architectural masterpiece!... It is nicknamed Southyork... because of it's resemblance to R J Ewing's ranch, Southfork... from the soap opera, Dallas!... The house is like a fortress behind eight... foot walls... and set in four acre grounds. Various critics... have likened it to a Tesco's superstores!... The little chef... and a glorified council house!... It has... pseudo-Tudor beams... no expense spared furnishings, including a dome glass roof... in the entrance hall... and vast main function room with a marble fireplace... and a galleried landing [].... Musicians gallery, innit?... [reading] The house has twenty five rooms including... special quarters for the Queen... and the Duke of Edinburgh... and Charles and Diana.... It is multa... and... it is mortar and bullet proof. Outside is a twenty five foot... swimming pool and landscaped gardens [].
[Josephine:] I don't think Fergie would want to stay there.
[Tina:] It is like er... it is like
[Josephine:] She'll leave the country I think.
[Tina:] It is like Tesco's isn't it?
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Oh yes, she'll go probably, I should imagine.... [reading] The mul, and the Duchess of York will become a multi-millionairess, in her own right, as a result of the break up of the marriage to Andrew... we can reveal today [].... Possible job, they can reveal it because it said in the... on the front page that... there's nothing been decided!
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] [reading] Fergie will receive a mammoth payment of twenty millions pounds,!... Which will come out of the Duke's personal trust fund.... And another five... hundred thousand every year... paid for by the Queen!... This will more than insure that she can continue to live... in the style she's enjoyed since her marriage.... Quite separately, the two children, Princess Beatrice, three, and Princess Eugenie, two, have been independently looked after again by the Queen!... On their births a trust a fund... of tens of thousands of pound... was started for them in their names by their grandmother....... This will guarantee all their school fees... and the basis of their future.... The huge down payment will come from a trust fund... of one million, set up by the Queen for Prince Andrew, the day he was born [].... See, they've put that million pound into... into a fund for him and that's been getting... erm
[Josephine:] Interest and interest on it.
[Tina:] twelve, twelve, thirteen, fourteen percent interest... a year!... And, you know... compound interest.... [reading] His sister and both brothers have identical trust funds... this million pound figure... has grown to the size, just today... around forty million... because Prince... because the Prince has not touched it... in all these years.... As Andrew's wife, Fergie can claim... half of everything he owns []!
[Josephine:] And they've given her half of it aren't they?
[Tina:] Mm.... Well everybody can do that.
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] Only it's just lucky that he's got a lot!....... [reading] Senior Buckingham Palace aid confirmed last night... the Duchess is entitled... to claim half the sum now... contained in that fund.... City experts had... calculated last night that the original million pound will be grown... with wise investment... to thirty eight and forty million.... In addition to this lump sum the annual []... Of course, they don't pay tax!... [reading] In addition to this lump sum the annual half a million pound... allowance will be paid to the Duchess by the Queen... partly to ensure that she is never tempted... to publish memoirs... or talk about her failed marriage.... Such,shu... shut up money... arrangements are never openly discussed, but the financial arrangements within the Duke and Duchess will include a contract... with a silent clause.... The senior aide said last night there will be carrot and stick clauses.... The Duchess will be told quite clearly... that if news or information gets out publicly... in any way... she could be fined, for example will be warned... that... time spent with her children will possibly be curtailed... if she doesn't tow the line [].... And it goes on and all.
[Josephine:] Well if she does... she can have the children taken off her!
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] Her time spent with the children.... So the Queen would hire a nanny to look after them
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] at Buckingham Palace, and she'd visit... occasionally.... Well they'd give them to her too.
[Tina:] [reading] Regular bills... include a household expenses... food, eating, a dress allowance... and the retention of two nannies... they've
[Josephine:] Here is er, Fiona Armstrong presents a special item in the national.... In the na, to the nation, her baby daughter.....
[Tina:] Oh.... Nobody else ever had one.
[Josephine:] She's on the telly every day! She's part of your household isn't she?
[Tina:] Well not mine!... I don't even know who she is!
[Josephine:] Well she, she reads to you often enough!
[Tina:] Oh!... Oh, but I don't know her name.... Oh watch the news.
[Josephine:] No, I'm just going to sleep at ten o'clock!....
[Tina:] Got her.
[Josephine:] No, she'll never.
[Tina:] She is as common as what.... He must have been a fool for her... er, you know?
[Josephine:] Well she was getting at Koo Stark!
[Tina:] Well I don't know!... When you come to... check up on it... Koo Stark... is so,so,... society!
[Josephine:] Yeah?
[Tina:] But that was nothing!
[Josephine:] Oh.... Oh... Well I wonder will Robert and Diane stay tomorrow?
[Tina:] Dunno.
[Josephine:] They usually, you know, say on the telly what they intend doing!... I can't understand why they left it till the last moment?... You know, before running up the door!... Cos there'd usually be a... how are you? Or... talk to you!... Nothing!
[Tina:] You don't know what has go... amongst them.
[Josephine:] But, but he'd of said wouldn't he?
[Tina:] But erm
[Josephine:] We can only stay... you know, we'll be coming on that night.... He always does!... We'll be coming over because of so and so, so and so, so and so!... We won't be staying he'll say.
[Tina:] They might of been out you see!... And Robert's in bed and overslept maybe?... And when he gets up and he's got to do this and he's got to do that,!....... And perhaps the... the neighbours leave the dog with Mandy... how ever it is....
[Josephine:] The dog stays in the house on his own.... Every day they go to work!
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] Christine goes to work!... The dog stays on his own!
[Tina:] Well, Christine takes him up there if they come here for the weekend.
[Josephine:] Oh yeah.... Or he, he goes and opens the door to let him out.
[Tina:] Well there you, you see!... Perhaps, perhaps they've... arranged to go somewhere on Saturday. They might tomorrow night, I don't know!... It's a great events coming here isn't it?... When they're all and!
[Josephine:] Well she doesn't go with Violet, does it?
[Tina:] If they're, I bet she's got her nose in everything!
[Josephine:] No, I don't think she would.
[Tina:] But if she wants.
[Josephine:] If they ask her to do something!... She, she will.
[Tina:] And if she wants a new pair of shoes... she's gotta go to a new town and pay for them.... everywhere to buy them!... Got her a paper of shoes today for.
[Josephine:] Yeah but I haven't er... decided right, I don't know her yet!
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] I haven't decided, but I don't know her yet!.... Can't wait till Margaret's gone!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] I'll go down then.... Hoping that's gonna, ready like.
[Tina:] Apart from everything, we know something about Margaret coming, see!... And they're al, alright.
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Shouldn't that be?
[Josephine:] Mhm.... They will know nothing! Nothing wrong with her!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] Yeah... er... [reading newspaper] Prime Minister, John Major... John Major's anxious wife, Norma... has a job keeping her cool... as she faces the anger of a town... blighted by unemployment.... The couple were both shoved and jostled... as around one hundred demonstrators greeted them with jeers and shouts in Bolton, Lancashire.... Police helmets went flying as officers formed a protective cordon around the Majors.... Bricklayer, Tony... one of the town's twelve... thousand jobless said... I came along to show my contempt with his government policies!... Mr Major abandoned the plan of twenty minutes full campaign... walk about... after just five minutes []!
[Josephine:] Mm.... We don't want them, you see!
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] It looks better all the time don't it?
[Tina:] Well i, if, it would be like that all over the country!... But in one place!
[Josephine:] Well it is like that all over the country though innit?
[Tina:] No.
[Josephine:] Well I think the sky is brightening up!... I do hope so!... I mean, you can see that red bush in the corner quite clear now!
[Tina:] Can you?
[Josephine:] Mm.... And I would see it a lot clearer if my glasses were clean!
[Tina:] Well I saw something here! I don't know what it was, but only a little tiny wee bit... and it was real funny!... I think.... I can't find it now!... It's always the way!... No!
[Josephine:] Well I got some of.
[Tina:] I can't remember where it... is.
[Josephine:] [singing] Mm mm mm mmmm mm mm mm... Oh ho, off to work we go... da da da dum dum da da [].
[Tina:] What about?... James... and Stuart... a couple of and when he was preg erm... that's... Douglas Hurd.
[Josephine:] Oh yeah Dougie!
[Tina:] He, when he was Foreign Secretary.... What is he now?... Foreign Secretary, you know?
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] He's so... public, him.
[Josephine:] Oh God!... Who would imagine!
[Tina:] [reading newspaper] Foreign Secretary Douglas Hurd is on the telly all the time... telling us he can't put his eye on a labour government... to be firm with Gadaffi of Libya... or sa... or Saddam Hussein of Iraq.... So here I publish a picture of him ten years ago... when he was Junior Minister... he is enjoying a marvellous a party at London's... Intercontinental Hotel.... He's forced the Libyan government... a cause for celebration... the tenth anniversary of the coming to power... of their president... Colonel Gadaffi.
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] Previous year Mr Hurd... on behalf of the Foreign office was celebrating in the.... The great event, an anniversary of the coming of power... of the... the... dictatorship.... And who was top man in that dictat... in that dictatorship... to which Iron Man Hurd raised his glass!... Saddam Hussein []!
[Josephine:] Mm.... didn't it?
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Mhm, and now they're trying to fight to get him from there!
[Tina:] Well now they are fighting! I mean the, they've done it once a, and... didn't do it!... That's all creating him back up now isn't it?... He was given a, a week
[Josephine:] [yawning] Ah, ah, ah, ah []!
[Tina:] or a fortnight or something... to do something with their lot.... It isn't raining is it?
[Josephine:] No, I don't think.
[Tina:] A bit foggy!
[Josephine:] Dunno.... Well, let's hope this weather picks up for when Margaret gets here.
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] Or she'll be looking a bear skin!... And her super warm coat!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yes []!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] Well i... ah, I dunno.... Well she won't think it's cold because... I mean, it's sunny every day is it?
[Josephine:] Well she couldn't of had it colder... than when dad was in hospital!... And by hell it was cold!... Bitter cold!... And wet! And blowing! You couldn't had it worst! The only you could of had was the snow!... Ooh, but that was!... Well she shivered! And she shivered!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []! Yeah, and what, new clothing
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] and she said as, well what she used to say about it was nobody's business!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]... And I mean, if they get a we, a wet day isn't it just rainy in there, it's lovely and warm!... In there, well, but it isn't warm.... But it is to us who is used to this sodding weather!... We had lovely weather then!... And, and we only had a rain... on one day I think it was.... Er, you know, like a shower, one big shower. Well normal shower.
[Josephine:] And it must have been cold bloody flat!
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] Must of been, cos they'd been out all day.... No fire, no nothing on! And then to go home, tired and cold in an empty place, and cold and... must of been terrible!
[Tina:] Oh I dunno if yo... you... get into bed and the blanket was on,yo... you know, you know?... She said she wasn't expecting to go out, out all day!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]... Well she erm... she can't remember exactly!
[Tina:] But I mean er... she knew
[Josephine:] But Rowan and her went on Boxing Day. When did David and Pam go?
[Tina:] I've no idea.
[Josephine:] Cos she didn't sleep here.... So they all must have gone out for the dinner.... So they must of stayed until erm... Boxing Day, Christmas Day rather.
[Tina:] Oh they're coming here for Christmas.
[Josephine:] Wish they was........ And they went on Boxing Day dinner.... They had their dinner and went!
[Tina:] I've no idea!... Not the foggiest!... Didn't they stay at the flat?... Somebody did!
[Josephine:] Yeah, David and Pam and Margaret all slept at the flat!... And they must of come over for Christmas dinner. Yes, because David tucked into his er... Christmas pudding!... He loved it!... And Pam was shouting about the bloody cholesterol!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] And then they had Boxing Day dinner.... And David and Pam must have gone as well, cos... Margaret went with... Rowan.... Up Newtown way, they were going up to Ruth.... And
[Tina:] Wonder where she got?
[Josephine:] I shall bloody quiz her about that!... And er... David and Pam must of gone the other way... you know, they'd gone their way home, and had gone her way home.... But er... and then Astra was here and she was going bloody North! She goes ey and it's colder [LAUGHTER] up there []!... Well she found it cold here and she.... Oh it was hysterical because it was blowing a gale!... Violet and me were over cleaning your flat.... That was the day you was taken into hospital... and she was in the bed, cos they were on their way down... so we were changing [LAUGHTER] the bloody beds!... And you come down through the alley way... and you could not keep your feet on the floor!... You could move!... And we'd got these bags,, I said... just bang all the sheets into bin bags, we can wash them next week if you think I'm starting!... But make sure, you know, you... well you take over the house, so we know what's in them in case they get thrown out with the bloody rubbish!... So we put them all into bin bags and we was trying to carry these bin bags [LAUGHTER] so the wind was taking them like balloons []!... And you were hanging on... and trying to keep your feet on the floor! God, I laughed!... And then er... they came.... I can't remember what time or anything about it.... I think they must have come to the flat. They'd been for a meal and they came to the flat and they rung us to say they were there.... Something like that, I can't remember.... And then, the next day they came over.
[Tina:] I think they came that night.
[Josephine:] The next day they came over.... And this gale was still blowing!... And it was blowing! You just couldn't
[Tina:] Well I dare say they went back to the hospital!
[Josephine:] No, they didn't!... No they didn't get, be there till eight!... Just eight-ish... something like that.... Cos they'd been for a meal on the way as well!... Cos I've said come over for supper. No, they didn't want supper.... Cos they'd had this meal.... And erm... then the next day... they came over... and David was laughing, he said, do you, do you know the alley way down between he said, well it blew it her up right against that bloody wall he said! Well Aunty couldn't move he said!... [LAUGHTER] He... I []... and I said, and you laughed at her? Course I did [LAUGHTER] he said []!... And I said, did you help her? No, I didn't. Let her battle it out he said!... Well they came over here then and they'd been up and they come back... with Gillian and all that and they stayed. And they went from here about... nine-ish I suppose?... They'd had supper anyway.... Then they were going over and they were gonna go to bed.... They'd been to the hospital, and they'd been over the flat so I said to them... well pop the blankets on... and come over here then and have your supper... and go back.... And the beds will be nice and warm for you to get into.... But anyway, they left here about nine o'clock. Well... she'd gone out through the door and the wind took her down the [LAUGHTER] bloody street!... I said to though, he said she was going there another way!... And David was there was laughing []!... And it was just... [LAUGHTER] she was running with it!... There's just her battling against it []!
[Tina:] They have mid-winter days just like our high summer!
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER]
[Tina:] It was lovely!
[Josephine:] Oh and we laughed about it! And I said, better go and [LAUGHTER] collect her!... But David said look at shifting []!
[Tina:] Yeah... but er you see... on Christmas Day... children were going about in bikinis and... and shorts, or no socks or so
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] I couldn't, you know,i,i, it's difficult to put it in your head, like when I was there! Oh, it's Christmas Day you know?
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Tina:] Christmas Day!... And I get us up in the morning now... and, she... said... she said the temperature rises to... sometimes a hundred and twenty in the summer!... And if it's a very hot day you try to stay in.
[Josephine:] Yeah, but it isn't summer yet!
[Tina:] Mm?
[Josephine:] It isn't summer yet!
[Tina:] No!... But if, if it'll do that at mid-summer i, it
[Josephine:] It's about ninety there now! Eighties.
[Tina:] Yes.... Eighty to ninety, sure to be!... And that's one of our terribly hot days!... Of course, everywhere i,i, it's all air conditioned and... and it's, obviously.... Definitely mustn't open a window!... Then the, daren't open the window!... Cos the flies will come in.
[Josephine:] Well she'll have bloody shock if she was here in the summer then!
[Tina:] Yes, I think.... Of course, I don't know, perhaps they
[Josephine:] Couldn't live in the winter!
[Tina:] Perhaps their flies are different to ours. [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] They are, they're the, the same.
[Tina:] Th They're mosquitoes.... Now then, she mosquitoes so they, they bite.
[Josephine:] Anyway you get a mosquito bite.
[Tina:] Yeah but, she said they don't da,the they bite you and it's got poison if you're not careful!
[Josephine:] I could never live with the window shut!
[Tina:] Of course, the room is air conditioned... all the time.... They have the batteries going and all.
[Josephine:] Yeah cos they have it keep pushing!... Same here!... One place to another!
[Tina:] Yeah, but it, it's circulating i, isn't it?
[Josephine:] Yeah, but it's all the same.... not too nice. It isn't fresh!... I was saying Danny the other day... do you remember the time he came and got out his in there?... I would get a piece of erm... well I got a piece in the greenhouse... it wouldn't worthy of it then, but it doesn't matter!... Piece of board... and fix in the doorway... and fix it open.... Put it high enough so that the cats wouldn't come, but leave it then.... It's just a big window open.... Cos then yo, once you have the doors closed as low as that... cos no air gets in!
[Tina:] No, actually cos it's not air
[Josephine:] We opened the
[Tina:] conditioned here! They are there!
[Josephine:] You open the top... and then let the cats in at the bottom!
[Tina:] Yeah, that's it!... And, and circulate air, you see.
[Josephine:] So I put a board across there.
[Tina:] They've got double windows.... Like, they got the window... and then they've got erm... a, a... sliding
[Josephine:] Sliding window inside.
[Tina:] Yeah.... Like a, a, a net... to keep the flies out. You can open the outside window.
[Josephine:] What do they call them?... Yeah.... Erm
[Tina:] Mosquito thing.... Well we used to have them in Middle House.... Erm, but ours was a piece of... frame work and a... grating on it, and you stuck that in the window, when you opened the window you push that in... so the air could come in and... mosquitoes couldn't.... You used to mo, mosquitoes dreadful at Middle House when the lake was there.
[Josephine:] It's the damp... warm and damp.
[Tina:] No, the lake was mouldy you see!
[Josephine:] Yeah, oh!
[Tina:] Stale, dirty water!... Was a breeding... place.... And we'd be out in the middle of that! Buzzzz... All in your face!
[Josephine:] Mind you, you do everywhere!
[Tina:] Yes, but that was a breeding centre there. It was... they were back and forward there by the thousands!
[Josephine:] [sighing] Oh I knew [], I shall have to go and er... put my bits back together again! I got the clock all on the floor now!
[Tina:] Well, yes.
[Josephine:] Anyone put their bloody foot on it!... Oh well, the sky is looking a lot brighter.... Isn't it?
[Tina:] Well it's still got a lot to do.
[Josephine:] Er, oh well it's er
[Tina:] That's if we've got it back!
[Josephine:] It's about somewhere!
[Tina:] It's poking through somewhere.
[Josephine:] Oh God!... I shall be satisfied that er er these things are shooting up.
[Tina:] I, I in, in the night.
[Josephine:] Good God, that one is going now!... Don't know where the hell it's going!... That one's going right up! It's nearly up on the fence!
[Tina:] When it was a.
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] The clematis.
[Josephine:] From erm... Wales.... It's sort of pale innit?
[Tina:] Which one? Which one?
[Josephine:] And the daffs are still looking nice!
[Tina:] Tomorrow is it, coming here?
[Josephine:] No.
[Tina:] Oh.... No, Violet was... It'll be Easter won't it?... Next week, the week after or something?
[Josephine:] Well I thought, she's coming down with Martin and Uncle Marvin and all that, and she's going to be here for dinner, now she isn't!
[Tina:] Oh.
[Josephine:] going up the step.
[Tina:] They look a lot better than they did last year!
[Josephine:] Well they've spread it now.... What about this poor thing in the corner?
[Tina:] Come in ruddy cat!... You come in.... It's a late one.
[Josephine:] Two week.
[Tina:] Oh is it? Oh!
[Josephine:] [whispering] Come in []!... Here, you alright now?
[Tina:] You got a white one.
[Josephine:] What?
[Tina:] There's a lot of white ones! There the ones you brought in er Are they?
[Josephine:] white.
[Tina:] Undo it all.
[Josephine:] There's an animal up there.
[Tina:] Oh!... Oh yeah, they were a mix! She did get a few out of one bag and a few out of another...., but I said I didn't want er... Narcite
[Josephine:] Aren't those funny? Those two... that you had in, you'd of thought they'd have... bloomed quicker, but there's... they're like that!
[Tina:] [LAUGHTER]
[Josephine:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah []! What happened to them?... Growth perhaps?... See them go, well they have now!
[Tina:] Well, they've been up there long enough now to
[Josephine:] To spread.... Yeah I know.
[Tina:] Tried the again?
[Josephine:] Mm.... Mm mm,
[Tina:] I think the cat's are trying to ruin it!... This is a miserable old lot here!
[Josephine:] That one's quite pretty, it's this bloody cable here!
[Tina:] Oh I like that one!
[Josephine:] Well I think he's quite pretty!... Poor old cactus!
[Tina:] First... it's erm... it's erm... they're too small!
[Josephine:] [whispering] They're not []!
[Tina:] No, well you want to put it in that front lawn.
[Josephine:] There's enough in that bloody front lawn, I don't know where ca about it!... Know what to think about.... I didn't know what to suggest about it.
[Tina:] Well there is not because... that doesn't seem to right
[Josephine:] I think they're guarding their van!... Oh, there's plenty in there now.
[Tina:] Ah, but this is the better of the two.
[Josephine:] A flaming lorry load of stuff!
[Tina:] Ah but they, I don't know i,i, if
[Josephine:] I dunno.... I can't answer!
[Tina:] ... Moving the or something.
[Josephine:] Put the bloody paraffin on it and burn the lot off!
[Tina:] by the roots you see. It's the roots that you've gotta get them by the top.
[Josephine:] Leave for three years.
[Tina:] Oh good!... No, take the paper.... Oh no!... Yes... that's right.... Yeah, that's it.
[Josephine:] Here you are then!
[Tina:] Nothing on the telly is there?
[Josephine:] Go and collect my bits out there.
[Tina:] Oh no look at that!
[Josephine:] Right then!... Go and collect all my bits.
[Tina:] Well have you finished.
[Josephine:] And they were forty what?
[Danny:] Forty two.
[Josephine:] Let's have a look.
[Danny:] [whistling]
[Josephine:] [singing] La la la la, la la... ah la la la la la
[Danny:] [whistling]
[Josephine:] mm mm mmm...... mm mm mm... mm mm mm
[Danny:] [whistling]
[Josephine:] Fisherman's friend....... Which friend are they talking about then?... I said do you go to?... Oh!....... It's for a.... Are you coping then?... Ay
[Tina:] ... retire soon.
[Josephine:] Oh, so they're retired?
[Tina:] Mm.... They still don't they?
[Josephine:] .
[Tina:] don't do anything!
[Josephine:] Tomorrow go and do the lawn.... Christmas I think... was the last time.
[Tina:] What is the date... today?
[Danny:] Twentieth.
[Josephine:] Twentieth.
[Tina:] Tomorrow is the first day of spring.
[Josephine:] Mhm.
[Tina:] Hopefully!
[Danny:] You eating some more potato?... They just swapped another.
[Josephine:] Labour did?
[Danny:] He made his... press speech this morning... saying that she couldn't even... cos he thought that... go down... the hospital.... And he saw many patients.
[Josephine:] Well that's what Norman Tebbit's telling him isn't it?
[Danny:] Open the book.
[Josephine:] No... and
[Danny:] It isn't!... It was about the same.... He's already made the statement this time.... And he was telling the opposite!... And.
[Tina:] Oh dear!
[Josephine:] gonna get the push first!
[Tina:] Mm?... Well I... seems like every bank's lending!
[Danny:] Just let me have the today.... They should know... after their
[Josephine:] Mm?
[Danny:] game.... Ha!
[Tina:] went to Bolton yesterday.
[Danny:] Ey... he said.... In his
[Tina:] He had a rollocking there!
[Danny:] He said that the... they, him and Linda pack up.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Josephine:] And then him and Nora... is.... Norma.
[Tina:] Norma.
[Josephine:] And police protection, get out of the town!
[Danny:] He's gonna find a lot of that!
[Tina:] Well when he gets in the right places... he's only been doing... schools and... you know?
[Josephine:] Hazel knows nothing about it.
[Danny:] That's the first time he said yesterday... he says... will you do something to
[Tina:] Yeah and then... you know... he knows that er... the su, ones.... But he hadn't been out in the
[Danny:] That's why
[Tina:] world yet!
[Danny:] Mind you, that had always.
[Tina:] Mm.
[Josephine:] That wasn't her earlier.
[Danny:] No, but she was always out there.... Never slept through!
[Josephine:] Oh yeah.
[Tina:] And I don't think his wife... is that type of woman.
[Josephine:] She can't stand that bit of pressure!
[Tina:] Well
[Josephine:] Wait till the eggs start flying!
[Danny:] painful... You!...... which is... strong
[Tina:] I agree.
[Danny:] strong conservative
[Tina:] Very well!
[Danny:] strong!... Have you
[Tina:] Oh!
[Danny:] maybe she does deal with
[Tina:] Ooh!
[Danny:] with the conservatives.... Five, six er
[Josephine:] Mm.
[Danny:] Do you wanna watch it before I tape over it?... Cos it's really worth watching!
[Tina:] Is it?
[Danny:] That is... bound to get some stick!
[Tina:] Ooh!...
[Josephine:] What's that?...
[Tina:] I'm not gonna!... Cos like they say yesterday er....
[Danny:] It's their... down the road.... I was really amazed... at the people... every time going round spoke... the chair
[Tina:] Mm!
[Danny:] they're so staunch... conservative!... They have five seats in Bedfordshire... they're all taken with conservatives!
[Tina:] Good Lord!
[Danny:] Only one side of them is crisp.
[Tina:] work for her before they go.
[Josephine:] I'm fighting working harder... they can't clear what they said... what's happening without the other group coming.
[Tina:] They're fighting with their lives aren't they?
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Tina:] Probably have to work harder!
[Josephine:] But they're not, they're not going to... get anywhere are they?
[Tina:] What is Major's job when he isn't Prime Minister?
[Danny:] I'll tell you which his job is,.
[Tina:] Not at all?
[Danny:] Dunno.... He used to work
[Josephine:] You mean the cabinet?
[Danny:] He used to work in the dock's offices.
[Tina:] Yeah.
[Danny:] As a clerk.
[Tina:] No, I know he was that.
[Josephine:] The next Prime Minister will get him a job, see.... Won't he?... Anything.
[Tina:] Well... he'll have a nice lot of money when he... finished being Prime Minister.
[Danny:] ....
[Tina:] Mm mm.
[Danny:] Yeah,.
[Tina:] Oh!
[Danny:] And I can't
[Tina:] There's too much of that P D R and Z Y X business!
[Danny:] Ey
[Josephine:] And what's it mean?
[Danny:] ... representation.... What it is......... anyway... proposal representation... are being sent out...... if anybody down here... you'll go into England...... if I voted conservative... you know, just say for example it wouldn't be the one past the post... it'll be the one with the most votes
[Tina:] That'll get the job.
[Danny:] that'll get the job... for the county.
[Tina:] Mm.... And that's what it is.
[Danny:] No.... Anyway... he says... it will be decided upon... cos... it's the... half an hour to go at it, you watch in the end....... He said if there's one thing... I always carry quite close to my... heart... and if you'll just give me a minute I'll take out.... And he read this...... this P R... and he said... this is from a junior minister, Conservative... minister... in nineteen eighty four... wro... wrote these words in a book... and he says... that up and coming... Conservative young minister... was none other than than Chris Patten.... And he was sat right next to him.... He didn't know anything about this... and he had to admit, he did say this!... This....... But now, he says, it'll change his mind.
[Tina:] Mm... To change his mind.
[Danny:] You should of heard the people in the audience!
[Josephine:] Well you can change your mind if you want to!
[Danny:] Yes but he wrote a book called this...... because he thought that er...... the conservatives were losing.... And they thought they were....
[Josephine:] Yeah.
[Danny:] And all he could say to them was...!... Nineteen eighty three.
[Josephine:] Well what's gonna come in to save them this time?
[Danny:] They're hoping... fall all back down again... that they're gonna fall back.... Fa
[Josephine:] You reckon?
[Danny:] go back again.... And they think other people will change their minds.... To keep the same Prime Minister now.
[Josephine:] You're wrong!
[Danny:] I like