[Julie:] On?
[Gary:] Right, I'll go and get a video, okay?
[Julie:] Yeah I don't know what's on.
[Gary:] Alright.
[Julie:] And er... warm this food up again.
[Gary:] Right. Do you want the telly on?
[Julie:] What you doing Vick? Eh? What you doing?
[Vicki:] I'm watching telly.
[Julie:] Are you? Playing with your teddy?
[Gary:] Ah?
[Julie:] You go building together. Put it back together then. You show Mummmy how it goes. Alright? There! You show me what a clever girl you are?
[Vicki:] ... and look.
[Julie:] Ooh! Ooh ooh ooh! He's fallen to pieces ain't he?... Can't do it like that can you?
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] No, oh oh oh!... Mummy go and put the kettle on.
[Vicki:] Ee ee.
[Julie:] You what?
[Vicki:] Ee ee!
[Julie:] Lee?
[Vicki:] Lee.
[Julie:] Yeah, Daddy's picking Lee up.
[Vicki:] Yeah. Oh!
[Julie:] Yes, he's doing the leaves.
[Vicki:] Put it in. Okay.
[Julie:] Ha!
[Gary:] Where's his chair?
[Julie:] Behind you!
[Gary:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] Hello sausage!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER] [].
[Gary:] That's your brother!
[Vicki:] He was crying.
[Gary:] Mummy wants to move the.... Please?
[Vicki:] Pour that in here.
[Gary:] I ca oh!
[Julie:] Have you put his er... bib on him?
[Gary:] Yeah, I see.
[Julie:] If he's gonna have his gonna have his er
[Gary:] Put it back!
[Julie:] dinner come tea s
[Gary:] Good girl!
[Julie:] so he didn't eat it all at dinner time.
[Gary:] Yeah. Good girl!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]... That's me!
[Gary:] No, it's just the
[Julie:] What are you gonna have for tea Vicki?
[Vicki:] And please
[Gary:] Get up!
[Julie:] Please
[Vicki:] can I have sausage, bacon and eggs?
[Gary:] Can you hold him... up a minute.
[Vicki:] Yes please.
[Julie:] What do you want? Well he's still got his bib on.
[Gary:] Yeah, and I was trying to do it up.
[Julie:] Oh!
[Gary:] No, no, no, just leave it!
[Julie:] No, cos you're no good at doing up! There are look, like that!
[Gary:] That's it.
[Julie:] There are.
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] He's funny ain't he?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Ooh my head's gone!
[Julie:] Er ah! Looks as though he's got his nappy on his head!
[Gary:] Ah! My headache's gone isn't it?
[Julie:] Vicki look, what you gonna have for tea?
[Gary:] Bacon.
[Vicki:] !
[Julie:] What you want for tea?
[Vicki:] I like!
[Julie:] You what?
[Vicki:] Lee.
[Julie:] Yeah, Lee's gonna have his. And he's gonna have this now.
[Vicki:] I'll... I'll ki ki Lee.
[Julie:] Yeah Lee.
[Vicki:] I'll....
[Julie:] Yeah, Lee's gonna have his tea, what do you want for yours?
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] Well don't you want any then?
[Vicki:] No.
[Julie:] No? Fine! Please yourself!
[Vicki:] That's Lee's.
[Julie:] Yeah, I'm gonna do Lee's now for him.
[Vicki:] Ki ki
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah []!
[Vicki:] He
[Julie:] Look at him laughing look! Hello cheeky!
[Vicki:] Hello cheeky!
[Gary:] I'll collect
[Julie:] Yeah, here's your cup. Can you stir his food round please?
[Gary:] Yep!
[Julie:] In this dish?
[Gary:] You having tea? But, oh.
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] No?
[Gary:] No?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Vicki:] No!
[Gary:] No?
[Julie:] No! Ooh!
[Gary:] Ooh!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] No?
[Julie:] I'm not moving!... In't she naughty eh? Your sister naughty?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Did you?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] No!
[Gary:] Did you?
[Julie:] Did she?
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Vicki:] Er ah
[Julie:] What? You what?
[Vicki:] No!
[Gary:] Yes!
[Julie:] No. as you're told.
[Gary:] Daddy said yes.
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] Are you naughty?
[Vicki:] Mm.
[Julie:] Are you naughty?
[Gary:] Ha!
[Vicki:] Well said no!
[Julie:] No, you're not naughty?
[Vicki:] Move! Move!
[Julie:] I'm not moving!
[Vicki:] Go over Daddy.
[Julie:] I'll smack your bum!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]... Cheeky!
[Julie:] Will we eh? Shall we smack her bum!
[Vicki:] No, it's not yours, it's your brother's.
[Julie:] Shall we smack her bum? [LAUGHTER] Hey []? There! Like that! [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] I want... Mummy!
[Julie:] You gonna have your tea? Are you?
[Vicki:] ... Daddy!
[Gary:] How much do you want in?
[Julie:] Well not very! Gotta be a bit thick! Ain't they, eh? Can't have it all runny
[Vicki:] Aha.
[Julie:] can you? That'll do!
[Vicki:] Cheeky!
[Julie:] ... that'll do!
[Gary:] Shall I add all that round the side which went all hard?
[Julie:] It's alright! Put it in. You've seen it
[Gary:] It's not the only thing that goes hard you know!
[Julie:] [whispering] Shut up! []! Oh yeah!
[Vicki:] Eh eh! Ki Vicki's.
[Julie:] No it's
[Gary:] Your
[Julie:] not Vicki's! It's Lee's!
[Gary:] You'll
[Vicki:] Ha ha!
[Julie:] I know, I just had some of it!
[Gary:] Oh yeah?
[Julie:] Yeah. It's not yours! Now go away!
[Vicki:] [crying] []
[Julie:] It's your brother's... innit? This is his only, this is first week on so
[Gary:] We try and
[Julie:] Yes you can. This is only his first week on... food like this. Dinner then.
[Vicki:] No.
[Julie:] So bog off! Mummy will do your tea afterwards.
[Vicki:] Where is... where's?
[Gary:] Well she's going round to Mum and Dad's. [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... Well she obviously knows. Gary! I can't feed her without
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Julie:] blooming!
[Gary:] Come on! Come on!
[Julie:] How can I feed him on this!
[Gary:] Do you want the rest of your crisps?
[Vicki:] Er no!
[Julie:] No! No!
[Gary:] No?
[Julie:] They're all
[Vicki:] Ha! Oh oh oh!
[Gary:] What do you want, a glass of lemon? Or lemonade?
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] No, don't want that.
[Vicki:] Lemon.
[Julie:] Yeah. Lemon?
[Vicki:] Daddy.
[Gary:] Come on then!
[Julie:] Go on then, Daddy'll get you some. And ask Daddy to do Lee a bottle.
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] It's alright.
[Julie:] Will you do him his bottle as well Ga?
[Gary:] Yes.
[Julie:] Then you have your tea, eh?
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Vicki:] Ah! Oh oh!
[Gary:] Lemon?
[Vicki:] Daddy!
[Gary:] Or?
[Julie:] Come on then, let's stiffen it up.
[Vicki:] ... It's mine Daddy!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Come on []!
[Gary:] Want this?
[Vicki:] Alright.
[Julie:] That's better.
[Vicki:] Daddy. It's,da Daddy. Oh!
[Gary:] There we go!
[Julie:] Come on then! Alright now Vick? Vicki? Are you alright?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Hey?
[Vicki:] Ah.
[Julie:] Mm! What does that mean? Yeah?
[Gary:] Then to go... where they are, yeah?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Coffee?
[Julie:] Yes please. Who's coming tomorrow Vicki?
[Vicki:] Di
[Julie:] Is she? Is Di coming? No I don't think so.
[Vicki:] Nanny.
[Julie:] No, nanny's not.
[Vicki:] Oh yeah.
[Julie:] No, who do you go shopping with?
[Vicki:] Ganga
[Julie:] Granddad, yeah. Is Granddad coming tomorrow?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Is he? Pick it up!
[Vicki:] Ganga... car.
[Julie:] You go in his car do you?
[Vicki:] Yeah. He... ha ah!
[Julie:] What do you do when you see Granddad coming down in his lorry?
[Gary:] What's that? Can I put the water on?
[Julie:] You don't need it on!
[Vicki:] Like... like that!
[Gary:] I've done the washing.
[Vicki:] Bath... bath!
[Julie:] Yeah, you can have a bath later.
[Vicki:] Yeah!
[Gary:] Daddy take you?
[Julie:] You have a bath after you've had your tea... and then you go to bed.
[Gary:] Daddy take you after tea?...
[Julie:] What do you do when you see Granddad coming down there in his lorry? What do you say?
[Gary:] He don't come down there now does he?
[Julie:] No. What do you say?
[Gary:] He doesn't come down there.
[Julie:] What do you do? What do you say? I know
[Vicki:] Granddad!
[Julie:] Granddad! What else do you do?... Go and get me your book then? Where's your book?
[Vicki:] I want
[Julie:] , you won't like it!
[Gary:] Did you have a card? She said this morning.
[Julie:] A card?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] Birthday card?
[Julie:] Oh yes, from Nicky! She says she's going to come round and... see me some time.
[Gary:] Which one.
[Julie:] Er... the bottom... bottom one nearest the stereo. In the unit.
[Gary:] Mm mm. With the bell in it?
[Julie:] I can't see it.
[Gary:] Is it up there?
[Julie:] That's the one. Next to your Mum's.
[Gary:] We will be seeing her, seeing, we're going out aren't we, in a couple of weeks time?
[Julie:] Well, we don't know yet do we?
[Gary:] What day is it?
[Julie:] Well it's supposed to be the second week in March that Lyn and Gary come down.
[Gary:] Oh your Dad said he'd be alright... to stay here.
[Julie:] Who did?
[Gary:] Your Dad.
[Julie:] Did he?
[Gary:] Oh I think so, yeah.
[Julie:] No! I ain't asked him yet! Aye, he said to your Mum... cos I thought she said might she'd have them again.
[Gary:] No! It's too much innit?
[Julie:] What? Won't hurt her Gary!
[Gary:] Or your Mum?
[Julie:] Yeah, but they're decorating aren't they?
[Gary:] Well they're not... for another two or three weeks!
[Julie:] How do you know that? They've already started!
[Gary:] It's....
[Julie:] No, it's, they just started the kitchen!
[Gary:] Started the kitchen.
[Julie:] Yeah, and he's started the kitchen. I don't think you want that do you mate? Is his bottle ready?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah, can I have it, he don't want this food.
[Gary:] Try it first bottle.
[Julie:] No it's, when I phoned her, went and saw the other night. What night was it? Tuesday night weren't it, when Dad was here?
[Gary:] Yep!
[Julie:] I phoned her up and er
[Gary:] Is this ready for wash?
[Julie:] Yeah. I phoned her up and... she said they'd started decorating... lifting the tiles off on the kitchen wall.
[Gary:] Are they?
[Julie:] Yeah. That's why he don't know when he's gonna get round to see Kevin.
[Gary:] Ah yeah!
[Julie:] He said it might be... tomorrow night, it might not be.
[Gary:] He might pop round tonight.
[Julie:] Well they might do but... I'm, dunno wouldn't like to say. Cos Mum didn't seem to think when she'd be down... with him doing that and then they've Di's bedroom to do.
[Gary:] Is he drinking that?
[Julie:] Yeah. Well seems to be.... You put the top on right haven't you?
[Gary:] Yes. Coffee madam!
[Julie:] Ta! Oh!
[Gary:] Mm!
[Julie:] I'll have to put it here.
[Gary:] I've got some Put it there look.
[Julie:] touch it. No, cos I want... can you pass me the ashtray and the fags. Thank you. Mummy can have a fag now you're not eating it. In fact, can you stop doing it on the.
[Gary:] Yeah certainly! I'll let you finish your fags.
[Julie:] Oh yeah, not up there
[Gary:] Well I dunno where
[Julie:] cos of Vicki.
[Gary:] you wanna put it!
[Julie:] Prefer it to be down there... then I... can you stay there!
[Gary:] Can I put me slippers on?
[Julie:] You've got your own drink haven't you?
[Vicki:] Oh yeah! I I.
[Julie:] Alright mate! Hold on!
[speaker004:] Er er er!
[Julie:] it.... Go on then, drink up! Good boy! And where are you going?... Get me your book then Vicki?
[Vicki:] No.
[Julie:] No, not that one! Go and get me your little one. Where's the red one with the... toothbrush and that in it?
[Vicki:] Eh?
[Julie:] Is it out in the kitchen?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Well go and get it then. Ask Daddy to get it.
[Vicki:] Oh oh!
[Gary:] What's that?
[Julie:] She wants her book off the... top.
[Gary:] ?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Those miniature books,?
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] Er er....
[Julie:] Come and sit down there and do it with Mummy.
[Gary:] Sounds dirty!
[Julie:] No! She goes through the book don't she? Tells me who's got shoes and... hat and coat and everything. Right! What, no, you can't do that! Now you can. Here are then.... Move your bag over there.
[Gary:] Hello mate!
[Julie:] Right, come on then look!
[Gary:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Right, Mummy turn the pages over and you tell me... what they all are.
[Vicki:] Oh!
[Julie:] What's that?
[Vicki:] Cat.
[Julie:] Cat. And who's got a cat?
[Vicki:] Ganny.
[Julie:] Granny.
[Vicki:] Er, I don't like that!
[Julie:] I know you don't like that, it's a panda.
[Vicki:] Pinka
[Julie:] Panda.
[Vicki:] Choo choo!
[Julie:] What's that?
[Vicki:] Er... a teddy.
[Gary:] Oops!
[Vicki:] Train.
[Julie:] It's what?
[Vicki:] A train.
[Julie:] A train. Good girl! And who's got a train?
[Vicki:] Vicki.
[Julie:] Yeah, Vicki has! Yeah, it's over there innit? And what's that?
[Vicki:] There.
[Julie:] Yeah, but what is it?
[Vicki:] Baby
[Julie:] Baby boy. That's right! And what's that?
[Vicki:] That's a brush.
[Julie:] Brush.
[Vicki:] Comb.
[Julie:] Comb. What's that?
[Vicki:] Toothbrush.
[Julie:] Yeah, it's a toothbrush innit? You clean your teeth with that don't you? What's that? Shoes. And who's got shoes?
[Vicki:] Di!
[Julie:] Dianne has she?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Well I think most people have got shoes Vicki! What's that?
[Vicki:] Socks.
[Julie:] Socks. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Boots.
[Julie:] Boots. Who's got boots?
[Vicki:] Fly.
[Julie:] Fly has has he?
[Vicki:] And I.
[Julie:] And I!
[Gary:] And Daddy.
[Julie:] Yeah that's right. And what's that?
[Gary:] Daddy's got boots.
[Vicki:] Coat.
[Julie:] Coat. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Hat.
[Julie:] Hat. Who's got a hat?
[Vicki:] Carl.
[Julie:] Carl. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Shish.
[Julie:] You have your dish don't you and your
[Vicki:] Spoon.
[Julie:] spoon for your tea, yeah. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Cu
[Julie:] Cup. What's that?
[Vicki:] Teddy.
[Julie:] Teddy. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Dolly.
[Julie:] Dolly.
[Vicki:] Mm.
[Gary:] She can't answer it!
[Julie:] What's that?
[Vicki:] Ball.
[Julie:] Ball, yes! And what's that?
[Vicki:] Kick it.
[Julie:] Yeah, you kick the ball don't you?
[Gary:] You kick with a ball, that's right!
[Julie:] What's that?
[Gary:] What's that Vick?
[Julie:] What's this?
[Vicki:] Car.
[Gary:] And what do you do in a car? Go out?
[Julie:] Well what's that?
[Vicki:] A cow.
[Gary:] And how's a cow
[Julie:] A cow.
[Gary:] go? Moo!
[Julie:] And who's got a cow?
[Vicki:] Nanny.
[Julie:] Nanny has. And where's
[Vicki:] That
[Julie:] nanny's?
[Vicki:] cow.
[Julie:] Nanny's got a cow on her fridge ain't she?
[Vicki:] cow.
[Julie:] I know what's in there! I spot check! Cheeky little sod! What's that?
[Vicki:] A cat.
[Julie:] No!
[Vicki:] Sheep.
[Julie:] Sheep. [LAUGHTER]... What's that?
[Vicki:] Horse.
[Julie:] Horse, that's right! And what's that?
[Vicki:] Ah.
[Julie:] Hen. Yeah. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Cat ah.
[Julie:] A cat.
[Gary:] Good girl!
[Julie:] And what's that?
[Vicki:] Little dog.
[Julie:] It's a dog innit?
[Vicki:] Ke
[Julie:] Uncle Kev and?
[Vicki:] Sa
[Julie:] No. And Aunty
[Vicki:] Samma
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] No!
[Julie:] Uncle Kev and Aunty?
[Gary:] [whispering] Ang [].
[Julie:] Ang. And who else has got a dog?
[Vicki:] De... Kevin.
[Julie:] Where did we go for dinner on Sunday? We go to Aunty
[Vicki:] Shello
[Julie:] Shelly.
[Gary:] And Uncle?
[Julie:] Right! And who's car did you go in?
[Gary:] Uncle?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Phil's [], that's right!
[Gary:] Phil's.
[Julie:] And what's that?
[Vicki:] Mhm.
[Julie:] Lee goes in that does he? He goes in a pushchair don't he? Yeah! What's that?
[Gary:] [cough]
[Vicki:] Chair.
[Julie:] Chair. And who's got a chair?
[Vicki:] Vicki.
[Julie:] And what's that for? What do you use your chair for?
[Vicki:] Tea!
[Julie:] Tea, yeah. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Baby
[Julie:] Baby what?
[Vicki:] boy.
[Julie:] Boy, yeah. And what's that? No, baby?
[Vicki:] Boy.
[Julie:] No, that's a baby boy and that's a baby?
[Vicki:] Boy!
[Julie:] No, what are you?
[Vicki:] Baby.
[Julie:] What are you?
[Vicki:] A girl.
[Julie:] Girl.
[Vicki:] Baby boy.
[Julie:] And what's that?
[Vicki:] Tree.
[Julie:] Tree yeah! And where are the trees? That's right! Outside aren't they? And what's that? Flower. Where's Mummy's flowers? Where are Mummy's flowers? Up there look! Aren't they? And who bought them for Mummy?
[Gary:] As Aunty... Pam would say there's Mummy's coronations!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah []!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah, Aunty Pam can't say carnations can she Vicki?
[Gary:] She has to say coronations!
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] What's that? What is it?
[Gary:] She can't say carnations!
[Vicki:] Boy.
[Julie:] Boy. And er?
[Vicki:] Girl!
[Julie:] Girl!
[Gary:] Girl.
[Vicki:] Shoes!
[Julie:] She's got shoes on has she?
[Vicki:] I've....
[Julie:] What have you got on?
[Vicki:] I've shoes.
[Julie:] Shoes?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] No, what have you got on? Pop-ons.
[Gary:] You got your pop-ons.
[Julie:] And what's that? Truck. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Bricks.
[Julie:] Bricks. And who's got the truck and bricks?
[Vicki:] Vicki.
[Julie:] Yeah, Vicki has! What's that?
[Vicki:] There.
[Julie:] Yeah, it's over there innit? That's right! What's that? What's this?
[Vicki:] Erm... book.
[Julie:] Book. And what's that?. And what's that? Say it again.
[Vicki:] A bag.
[Julie:] A bag, yes. And what's that?
[Vicki:] Keys.
[Julie:] Keys. And who's got... who's got keys?
[Vicki:] Granddad.
[Julie:] That's right! And what's that?
[Vicki:] Clock.
[Julie:] Watch. What's that?
[Vicki:] Lorry.
[Julie:] No, it's not a lorry. What is it?
[Vicki:] A bus.
[Julie:] It's a bus innit? And what's that?
[Vicki:] Car.
[Julie:] A car, that's right! Alright, so what's this?
[Vicki:] Orange.
[Julie:] Orange.
[Gary:] Good boy!
[Julie:] And what's that?
[Vicki:] Apple.
[Julie:] Apple.
[Gary:] You want pudding?
[Julie:] And what's that?
[Vicki:] Orange.
[Julie:] No!
[Vicki:] Nana.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Nana []. Yes! And wait for it! What's that?
[Vicki:] Bath.
[Julie:] Bath. And what's that?
[Vicki:] A duck.
[Julie:] Duck.
[Vicki:] Soap.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Soap []. So soap!
[Gary:] Ooh! Ooh!
[Julie:] Bloody hell mate! [LAUGHTER] Who's got wind []? And what's that?
[Vicki:] Boat.
[Julie:] Boats. And that's it! All done! Good girl!
[Gary:] Good boy!
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Your brother got wind!
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[Vicki:] Oh no!
[Julie:] What's that? That's a rabbit
[Gary:] Bu
[Julie:] innit?
[Gary:] [belch]
[Julie:] And what did Mummy have to do
[Gary:] Good boy!
[Julie:] with your rabbit? Mm.
[Gary:] Is that better?
[Julie:] Yeah, your cuddly rabbit that er... Aunty Nicky bought you for Christmas weren't it?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] It's in your bedroom innit?
[Vicki:] Mm. Mummy! Mummy!
[Julie:] Yeah, what darling?
[Vicki:] Mummy!
[Julie:] Yeah, Mummy put it away
[Gary:] Tickle ickle ickle ickle ickle!
[Julie:] didn't she?
[Gary:] Tickle ickle ickle ickle ickle ickle ick!
[Julie:] Yeah. You're not to be frightened of it you know.
[Gary:] What's that?
[Julie:] That's cos it's
[Gary:] [cough]
[Julie:] like Thumper innit? Like she's
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] got? Innit?
[Gary:] [belch]... Pardon me!
[Julie:] Look! Another rabbit look on the telly! That's like that one innit?
[Vicki:] A orange rabbit.
[Julie:] Well if Daddy turns the telly over... can watch Edd can't you?
[Vicki:] Yeah. Edd. E
[Julie:] You don't have to turn the sound up.... Here are, look who's that? [LAUGHTER] No it's not Neighbours! Not yet []!
[Vicki:] It's it's Abers.
[Julie:] No it's not Neighbours! Who's that look?... Who is it?
[Vicki:] It's E
[Julie:] Edd. And who's got Edd?
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Julie:] Who's got Edd?
[Gary:] His eye looks sore.
[Julie:] Does it?... Edd the Duck innit? Who gave you your Edd?
[Vicki:] Ja
[Julie:] Jason did did he?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] And?
[Julie:] Who bought your other one? [LAUGHTER] No []! Mum
[Gary:] No!.
[Julie:] didn't!
[Gary:] Mummy.
[Julie:] Mummy and Daddy.
[Vicki:] Oh.
[Gary:] Mummy bought it for Daddy really!
[Vicki:] And it's Abers.
[Julie:] No, it's not Neighbours! [LAUGHTER] Not yet []!
[Vicki:] Ah.
[Julie:] Yeah, you'll see Edd again in a minute.
[Vicki:] Yeah. Ooh!
[Gary:] Oops!
[Julie:] Right in the old left
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh!
[Vicki:] yeah.
[Gary:] Was that funny?
[Vicki:] Mm mm.
[Julie:] That hurt me!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Was that funny?
[Vicki:] Ah, it was.
[Julie:] Does your Dad know you've come home?
[Gary:] Jimmy was gonna let him know.
[Julie:] Oh was he? So you didn't say anything this morning?
[Gary:] He said... gonna try and last up to, I said well I've gotta go... so I'll see how I go but... I was shaking I just couldn't!
[Julie:] What did your Mum say then?
[Gary:] She give me some T C P pastilles.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... Is that all?
[Gary:] Dad give me wha what he had in his truck as well.
[Julie:] I thought they were for sore throats and things Gary?
[Gary:] They are.
[Julie:] Well you haven't got a sore throat have you?
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Oh you have! Hello mate! Are you cheeky!
[Gary:] Had a sore throat for a couple of days!
[Julie:] Hiya cheeky! Oh Mummy
[Gary:] But it's not just the sore throat, it's when I cough... it hurts all over.
[Julie:] I forgot to ask your Mum yesterday, Dad wants two films getting... before next Saturday.
[Gary:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] For Di's do.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] But he says he's gonna pay me on... he's gonna give me the money on Tuesday
[Gary:] Shall I get her to get them... tomorrow?
[Julie:] Eh?
[Gary:] Shall I ask her to get
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] them tomorrow?
[Julie:] No, cos sh... I always give her the money beforehand. So on Saturday... I'll ask her if she can get them Wednesday for me definitely cos then you can... I can get the money off Dad Tuesday... you can give it her Wednesday morning, and then I can pick them up Wednesday afternoon when I go over. But as long as she don't forget Ga... cos I won't see her, well we'll see her on the Saturday but it... well I suppose that'll... that won't make much difference will it? I suppose we could have them then. Provi he wants to put them in his camera and that see, so
[Gary:] Mm mm.
[Vicki:] Oh!
[Julie:] Yeah, what is it?
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [cough]
[Julie:] Are you going in the bath later then?
[Gary:] Daddy take you for a bath?
[Vicki:] Mm. Mm.
[Gary:] Not yet though.
[Julie:] No, not yet. All have some
[Gary:] We'll have so some tea first.
[Julie:] We'll do tea early seeing as her Daddy's home from work.
[Gary:] Put the fire back on again soon.
[Julie:] Oh no you'll have to.
[Gary:] No, leave I've gone cold again!
[Vicki:] Eh! Ah!
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] Ah! Ah!
[Julie:] Oh yeah it's hot innit?
[Vicki:] Cold.
[Gary:] Mummy.
[Julie:] It's not cold!
[Vicki:] No, warm.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Warm is it []?
[Vicki:] Mm.
[Gary:] Look cold... his hands are closed.
[Julie:] You been in the bedroom haven't you mate? And you... the heater's not on. I ain't put the heater on.
[Gary:] Oh ain't you?
[Julie:] No!
[Vicki:] It's warm.
[Julie:] It's warm is it?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Where is it warm?
[Vicki:] In... there.
[Julie:] You what?
[Vicki:] Warm.
[Julie:] Warm? I see!
[Vicki:] Ah! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Warm your hands up don't you, when you're cold? Ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER] It's
[Julie:] Can you do it Mummy. Do it to Mummy. That's it!
[Gary:] Ooh what a smile!
[Julie:] Rub my hands together.
[Gary:] Smile for Daddy.
[Vicki:] Cold.
[Julie:] Am I cold am I?
[Gary:] Can you smile for your Daddy?
[Vicki:] Ah! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Can you smile for your Daddy?
[Julie:] Pardon! [LAUGHTER]... Vicki!
[Gary:] Oh Vicki!
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] What was that?
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Hmm!
[Vicki:] Mummy.
[Gary:] Oh dear!
[Julie:] It wasn't Mummy!
[Vicki:] Vicki.
[Julie:] Yeah, it was you weren't it?
[Gary:] Sounded like Mummy!
[Vicki:] ... my Mummy nice.
[Julie:] Is it?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Really []?
[Vicki:] It's, Daddy. Granddad.
[Julie:] Is it?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Alright then.
[Vicki:] That was Daddy.
[Julie:] Really! I dunno what you're saying!
[Vicki:] I've
[Julie:] What are you trying to tell me?
[Vicki:] [cough]
[Julie:] Cough it up! Not like yesterday. You're not gonna be sick are you?
[Vicki:] I kiss you.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... You dirty little devil!
[Vicki:] No, Mummy you!
[Julie:] It wasn't Mummy! It was you!
[Vicki:] I made Mummy.
[Gary:] Mm!
[Julie:] Really?
[Vicki:] And
[Julie:] What do you think you're doing miss! Now what you got? You ain't got a dirty bum have you? Oh!
[Vicki:] weren't very nice!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You smell!
[Julie:] Did it? Have you?
[Vicki:] It is very
[Julie:] Hello mate!
[Vicki:] nice.
[Julie:] You need a bath!
[Vicki:] A bath!
[Julie:] You need your face washing
[Gary:] He can have one tonight as well, yeah.
[Vicki:] But I... I
[Julie:] Oh God! You don't wanna clean your teeth do you Vicki? It takes you about three hours!... Are you going in the bath?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Well I know you are!
[Vicki:] I want with Daddy.
[Julie:] Daddy's going to take you is he?
[Vicki:] Yeah. And Mummy.
[Julie:] No, I'm not!
[Vicki:] Daddy.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] I, Lee.
[Julie:] Lee's gonna have a bath is he later?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Shall we get some sausages out then darling?
[Julie:] Go on then. Haven't drunk my coffee yet.
[Gary:] I'll do it for you my love!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh you bloody creep []!
[Vicki:] Oh.
[Julie:] What are you doing?
[Gary:] How many
[Vicki:] I just
[Gary:] do you want?
[Julie:] You're doing. Only four. Oh, and you better make it five cos
[Vicki:] And me!
[Julie:] Vicki can have one.
[Gary:] Aren't we having
[Julie:] Well don't yo... you don't want anything cooked do you? Do, yeah.
[Gary:] We gotta put them in the deep fat fryer.
[Julie:] Oh no! It's not worth getting that out is it?
[Gary:] I dunno, it's up to you.
[Julie:] No, I wouldn't
[Gary:] It's just as easy innit?
[Julie:] No
[Vicki:] [singing] [].
[Gary:] Get them all in one go then.
[Vicki:] Mummy, my Mummy.
[Gary:] Yeah. Get them all in in one go.
[Vicki:] Mummy you.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I've left the lot out.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Vicki:] [singing] Mummy, my Mummy [].
[Gary:] You want five do you?
[Julie:] Mhm. Well what are you trying to say?
[Vicki:] Yeah. It's
[Gary:] It's up to you, what do you wanna do? Wanna get the deep fat fryer out or not?
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] No, okay
[Vicki:] Erm
[Gary:] then. Put them on a plate, right?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Vicki:] I said... that!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Pardon []?
[Vicki:] I said... ah... er... er.
[Julie:] Do you wanna sausage sandwich for tea?
[Vicki:] Daddy! Daddy! Okay.
[Julie:] Then we have roast tomorrow night can't we?
[Vicki:] Yeah. chair Daddy?
[Julie:] Mm?
[Vicki:] A chair.
[Julie:] No, you won't go in your chair yet!
[Vicki:] I'll wait for Daddy.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] Er!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] That's twelve out, okay?
[Vicki:] Ah
[Julie:] Bloody hell! I thought you were gonna have the bacon?
[Gary:] Well I'll have a bit of bacon as well. There's not a lot of bacon. Can you get some tomorrow?
[Julie:] I'll haven't I?
[Vicki:] Dad, Daddy! Day Daddy.
[Julie:] Well I didn't get any last week cos there was still a lot, lot in there Ga.
[Gary:] Well taken a lot.
[Julie:] Has he? Are you talking as well? Eh?
[Vicki:] And me!
[Julie:] You what?
[Vicki:] That's boy.
[Julie:] That's Mummy's coffee! Leave it alone!
[Gary:] Don't get them same time will you?
[Julie:] Keep your eyes off!
[Gary:] You won't ke get all them under the grill as well as the bacon.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Ya.
[Gary:] Will you? Eh?
[Julie:] Ya. [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Thought that was Dad then, but it's not he's at work. No Vicki! You won't get all them
[Julie:] No, don't do that!
[Gary:] under the grill will you?
[Julie:] Sh
[Gary:] As well as the bacon? Do the bacon with the... in the erm... frying pan. Shall I whack it under... the grill now?
[Julie:] No, not till after.
[Vicki:] play.
[Julie:] No, leave him Vicki! He don't wanna be lifted up!
[Gary:] Think we eggs? weren't they?
[Vicki:] Say
[Gary:] We'll leave it.
[Vicki:] Say... train, play.
[Julie:] Pick his bottle up Vicki please?
[Vicki:] Want... some more?
[Julie:] No, go and take it out in the kitchen for Mummy.
[Vicki:] More?
[Julie:] No I don't think he wants it!
[Vicki:] No.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Vicki:] No.
[Gary:] It's okay.
[Julie:] He don't want it!
[Vicki:] More.
[Gary:] Give it Daddy darling. Give it to Daddy.
[Vicki:] There.
[Gary:] No, give it to Daddy.
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Gary:] Give it Daddy.
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Julie:] No it can't go up there.
[Gary:] No, give it Daddy!
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Gary:] Here are, Daddy take it out in the kitchen.
[Julie:] Ha!
[Gary:] No?
[Vicki:] No.
[Gary:] Oops!
[Julie:] Ooh God! You sat on him! [LAUGHTER] Ha, ha ha ah ah []! You give him a kiss now cos you sat on him. Look! Mm?
[Gary:] Will I do tea?
[Julie:] Not yet!
[Gary:] No, nothing like that.
[Julie:] She's trying to put that up there Gary.
[Gary:] Right, Daddy do it? There you go!
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] Shall I give your brother a kiss cos you sat on him?
[Julie:] Good girl!
[Vicki:] Sorry!
[Julie:] Sorry! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Sorry!
[Julie:] Yeah, she's saying to him.
[Gary:] Good girl!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Where you going now?
[Julie:] You just laugh don't you mate, eh?
[Gary:] Come back here.
[Vicki:] Sorry!
[Julie:] Sorry, yeah alright, you said sorry!
[Vicki:] Sorry!
[Julie:] Oh!
[Vicki:] Sorry! Sorry!
[Julie:] It's alright innit mate?
[Gary:] Come back here! What you looking at? What have you seen?
[Vicki:] No, oh oh oh oh!
[Gary:] No, no, no, no, no, no!
[Vicki:] No! No! No! No! No!
[Julie:] Don't kick Vicki!... Oh look Vick! Look what's on the telly! On our telly look!
[Gary:] [whistling]... Vicki! Vicki!... I was gonna clean my tank tonight Jean but... [LAUGHTER] I suppose that's [] Mm? Don't kick Mummy darling?
[Julie:] It needs cleaning though doesn't it?
[Gary:] It does need cleaning,!... Peepbo!
[Julie:] You tired mate? Ooh mind your feet Vick!
[Gary:] Peepbo!
[Vicki:] No.
[Julie:] Don't want any kicking!
[Vicki:] Daddy's.
[Julie:] No, it's not Daddy's, it's that lady's innit?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] That lady brought it
[Gary:] Yeah don't touch that!
[Julie:] didn't she?
[Vicki:] Mummy.
[Julie:] Yeah, well you don't touch!
[Gary:] It's not ours!
[Vicki:] Daddy.
[Gary:] A lot of money that!
[Vicki:] Lady.
[Julie:] Yeah, that lady brought them didn't she?
[Vicki:] Mm.
[Julie:] That's right!
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Was she outside was she, in a car?
[Gary:] Is she gone? Have a look see if she's gone.
[Julie:] Ga this blooming... cup's all sticky!
[Gary:] Mm!
[Julie:] With his food!
[Gary:] Mind you don't fall! Has she gone?
[Julie:] Who can you see out there then Vick?
[Gary:] Er, a lady.
[Julie:] No, that lady's gone ain't she?
[Vicki:] Oh! Yeah.
[Julie:] She'll be back next week.
[Vicki:] Yeah. And... back.
[Julie:] Ooh! Oops! Ooh bloody
[Gary:] Oops!
[Julie:] hell! She nearly
[Gary:] You alright?
[Julie:] went!
[Gary:] Ooh ooh ooh! Ooh ooh, what have you done? Nearly fell didn't you?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] You're silly aren't you?
[Vicki:] Mm.
[Julie:] Are you silly?
[Vicki:] A yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah? [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] Daddy.
[Gary:] You watch you don't fall!
[Vicki:] The lady.
[Julie:] No, the lady's gone!... Is it snowing out there?
[Vicki:] I she... ah,!
[Julie:] Leave that on tape. I quite like that. No, don't turn it up!
[Vicki:] Ah! Ah!
[Julie:] They'll make up some
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Julie:] you can still er
[Vicki:] Ah! Ah! Ah, ah, ah!
[Julie:] follow it cos, they probably don't
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Julie:] You have to make up words from the letters that they've er... but in that order. Like that erm... erm [LAUGHTER] I can't think of any []! Er
[Gary:] Big words?
[Julie:] Well no!
[Gary:] Could be anything... at all.
[Julie:] But they've gotta be in that order.
[Gary:] H L T
[Julie:] Like it's gotta start with a P, then it's gotta have a P before the, before the H.
[Gary:] Mhm.
[Julie:] If you see what I mean?
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Me and your Mum sitting doing one on Wednesday. We're a bit we're a bit thick []! Then again they don't give us enough time. You could do with like, longer.... And then it's er... this is Catchword, then at half past four it's Countdown.
[Gary:] Is this how you what as he got
[Vicki:] Daddy.
[Gary:] little glasses.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] Lady. Lady.
[Gary:] [cough]
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] I don't think Mummy's gotta get up now cos I'm stuck on the floor!... It's all gone.
[Gary:] [singing] []!
[Vicki:] I,.
[Julie:] Mind your brother please. Nice?
[Gary:] Yum yum!
[Julie:] Can you hold that a minute for me while I get up? Ta!
[Gary:] Cor!
[Julie:] Oh these are quite good! Anagrams or something. All of Red Ben is er... there are! Alfred Noble. [LAUGHTER]... It's alright when they bring it up on the screen and then tell you.... Ooh! [shouting] No []!
[Gary:] [shouting] Put him down []!
[Julie:] No, Vick you don't pick his up!
[Gary:] Gently!
[Julie:] I'll come back for you Vicki cos er....
[Vicki:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Beep beep a minute!
[Gary:] Is that all the way round?
[Julie:] To er... Gary turn the tape over in a minute, alright?
[Vicki:] Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!
[Julie:] I'll chuck this food in the bin Gary
[Gary:] Okay.
[Vicki:] Mummy! Ah!
[Julie:] cos it's not worth, he can't eat that again. Shouldn't have really warmed it up the first time.
[Vicki:] Ee! [baby crying]
[Gary:] ... Ooh dear!
[Vicki:] I... here.
[Gary:] Where's your dummy?
[Julie:] It's there somewhere isn't it? It should be there. Is he sat on it?
[Gary:] Have you sat on your dummy?
[Julie:] Oh, I'll go and get it, it might still be in... in the... in the car.
[Gary:] Yeah. I put it in!
[Julie:] No, I haven't seen you, I ain't seen him with it! Not while, not since you brought him in.
[Gary:] [singing] [].
[Julie:] I'm just gonna go to the
[Gary:] No not with Mummy darling.
[Julie:] Are you ready?
[Gary:] Where's Mummy going?
[Vicki:] Pee!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Where?
[Vicki:] Pee. Pee.
[Gary:] Going to the toilet.
[Vicki:] Ah, Vicki.
[Gary:] No, you stay here with Daddy.
[Julie:] No Vicki!
[Gary:] Boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing!
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Gary:] Oh!
[Vicki:] Bang!
[Gary:] Bang!
[Vicki:] Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
[Gary:] You alright?
[Vicki:] I'm going pee, pee! A pee!
[Gary:] Eh?
[Vicki:] A pee. Mummy. Erm
[Gary:] Put it together then.
[Vicki:] !
[Gary:] Put him together. Put together. Watch you don't fall!
[Vicki:] Bye! Bye!
[Gary:] Oops!
[Vicki:] !
[Gary:] Sorry?
[Vicki:] Pee.
[Gary:] No it's not a potty. There's your potty under there. But Mummy's gonna change you in a minute.
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] That's it! Gently! Just do it gently like that. That's it, press, that's it! That'll do nicely won't it? That's nice innit? Yeah! That's it now, no, no harder. gentle my love.... Ooh! Ooh ooh ooh!
[Vicki:] Baby! Baby!
[Gary:] Gently Vicki! What's on tonight? What do we dance to? Top of the Pops! You and Daddy dance? Yeah? Tonight, bop? You bopping? Are we gonna bop?
[Vicki:] Yeah. Yeah!
[Gary:] Yeah! We do don't we? And who was on last night? Boxing. Can you box?... Yeah!
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] No, not on your brother!... Not on your brother I said! No!
[Vicki:] Poo!
[Gary:] Not on your brother! Leave him alone! Box with Daddy don't you?
[Vicki:] On Lee?
[Gary:] Yeah!... [shouting] Are you alright Jean []? Who's this coming?
[Vicki:] Mummy. Mummy. Mummy. Mummy.
[Gary:] Do do do do dee do!... The lady. Ah, ah ah!
[Vicki:] Oh! Oh!
[Gary:] ... Yeah okay.
[Vicki:] Ah!
[Julie:] Is it still going Gary?
[Gary:] Looks like it.
[Julie:] Yeah, it's nearly finished.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] I se... see Helen, Mum might be going tonight with my er... prezzie. They might come and pick up the.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Well they might do mightn't they? Cos I didn't see her yesterday. Look at those the marks all over the the window! After that man cleaned them didn't he Vicki?
[Vicki:] Oh!
[Julie:] Pity they can't do inside as well!... What's she sat on?
[Vicki:] Oh!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] put on with it.
[Julie:] Oh well she must be sat on her potty! Oh just
[Gary:] She wants changing first. Oh oh oh oh!
[Julie:] Yeah I know. I'll do her in a minute.
[Gary:] Put the fire back on eh?
[Julie:] Mm.
[Gary:] I've gone cold!
[Julie:] Mm. It in't very warm in the bedroom I'll have to go and put the heater on... in
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] there after tea cos
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] of Lee going to bed.
[Gary:] I'll do it now.
[Julie:] Alright then. Those jeans are on there but they won't hurt.
[Vicki:] No!
[Gary:] Oh!
[Vicki:] And er Ah ba! Ah ba!
[Julie:] Oi no! If you do Vicki and Lee... if we do Vicki and Lee then we can put the water on when they a... when they're having theirs. Can't we? It's a bit early yet Ga
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] That's that erm... Dartmoor Wildlife Park, that's Dartmoor or wherever it is! When he was little he was sat in his buggy
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] his lunch. And she gotta showed down
[Gary:] Fifteen bits and then
[Julie:] from on top of a
[Phil:] Now that's right!
[Julie:] building.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Right on top of him... and it turned round and smacked
[Gary:] Oh!
[Julie:] him in the face and he's never liked them since.
[Gary:] No, leave the sound! You can listen to it without the sound.
[Phil:] Why, what you got on?
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Ha! This []!
[Phil:] There's ashtray there.
[Shelly:] Oh well aunty Julie's had a little boy then Sam?
[Sammy:] Yeah I know.
[Phil:] Could. No, you're not allowed to have it.
[Shelly:] Yeah exactly eight pound.
[Phil:] Eight pound? That's quite big innit?
[Julie:] Not really. Not seeing the size she was.
[Shelly:] No! And they said it was gonna be a difficult birth and that cos
[Phil:] Can you see the spikes?
[Shelly:] baby isn't she?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Just see them can't you?
[Shelly:] didn't she?
[Julie:] I thought she was really lucky though!
[Phil:] Mind you don't bang your head. Alright?
[Gary:] Yeah not bad for trainers as well in't they?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Normal
[Vicki:] Lee!
[Gary:] normal trainers but they just got spikes in them. Seventy, about seventy five pound a pair!
[Julie:] So he's gonna do it cash?
[Shelly:] Well the chap came yesterday
[Phil:] Watch!
[Shelly:] when
[Vicki:] Ouch!
[Phil:] Exactly!
[Shelly:] she was on her way into town see
[Sammy:] [screaming] Ahhh []!
[Phil:] Well I don't know which turns out... best
[Shelly:] And she came out a you know seeing who was going in
[Sammy:] [screaming] Ah ah ah ah ah []!
[Phil:] They know when.
[Shelly:] and Phil went round there yesterday afternoon.
[Phil:] Fifteen quid for this.
[Shelly:] And she said that she'd had the baby she was great.
[Phil:] How many am I losing? Yeah but, and she should of phoned, did she?
[Shelly:] She did!
[Gary:] Well yeah, we had a
[Phil:] And if you wrap them round the
[Julie:] Supposed to be going down there this afternoon but
[Phil:] Well should have won
[Sammy:] oi!
[Phil:] the shoe. Yeah.
[Gary:] They had a bit of bad luck they reckon it was
[Phil:] Oh, yes I know. He sat in seven minutes didn't he?
[Shelly:] We'll just drop the kids over Beryl's and er
[Gary:] And leave them, leave with them
[Julie:] [cough]
[Gary:] don't they?
[Shelly:] Got to just pop into town.
[Julie:] Okay.
[Gary:] What's that? Oh Malcolm does like turkey so we'll have turkey tomorrow.
[Shelly:] Yeah, I couldn't get one down Co-op yesterday, they didn't have any. Well they did
[Phil:] Well chicken.
[Shelly:] You could either have a ten or a twelve pound
[Phil:] No, not that.
[Shelly:] one
[Gary:] You not getting them and all?
[Shelly:] or you could have a
[Gary:] What about you?
[Julie:] I gotta cook chicken for them.
[Shelly:] Or you could have a
[Vicki:] No!
[Shelly:] piddling little chicken
[Vicki:] No!
[Shelly:] for about four pound
[Phil:] You don't get nothing on them chickens?
[Shelly:] cos only had... not ha, I thought no way!
[Phil:] At least I'll give you, who's gonna bet right, who is... at first place tomorrow, they're bound to be two, first of the day, so
[Shelly:] I thought well in town you can get about... they have er... a big turkey. I'll go and get one this afternoon. And I've gotta get erm
[Vicki:] No!
[Shelly:] It's your granddad's birthday innit, on Tuesday?
[Vicki:] Urgh!
[Julie:] Sit down!
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] I'll get him a card.
[Vicki:] [crying]
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Shelly:] Well I'm only
[Gary:] Stop pulling her hair!
[Shelly:] I'm only giving cards out because as you know nan doesn't bother with birthdays
[Sammy:] Yeah sit er!
[Gary:] Terrible! Them two! Pulling hair!
[Vicki:] [crying]
[Julie:] Well you're pulling, you little bugger!
[Shelly:] And I suppose I better get er... Carl's birthday card while I'm at it.
[Gary:] oi!
[Julie:] You saw that card I brought for Andy didn't you? Oh I didn't show you it. Just come this way. Have a swinging birthday
[Gary:] Take this... take this
[Julie:] no, it's your birthday have a swinging time on
[Gary:] Come here!
[Julie:] and then inside it said... gotta make sure you give in any... no, let's hope you you get
[Phil:] Up you get!
[Julie:] what you've got!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Sammy:] Yo you've got a.
[Julie:] Get Julie a card as well.
[Phil:] I should thrash her!
[Shelly:] I ought to go to the party.
[Julie:] Oh I think I've got one.
[Phil:] Oh yes.
[Julie:] Yeah, it's a lovely from erm... Avon for Anne. But er... be fine for the baby and everything.
[Shelly:] And where else?
[Phil:] But er
[Julie:] That's right, yeah.
[Phil:] where do you put your
[Julie:] so I ordered a... so many
[Vicki:] mum mum!
[Shelly:] That's right. hotel.
[Phil:] Not quite there. Get that hat.
[Julie:] Cos I said.
[Shelly:] Yeah she used to nice.
[Vicki:] Ah no! No!
[Phil:] nought point ten and going up... point two of a second, that is fast!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Have you gotta get a card for Julie as well?
[Gary:] First leg look.
[Phil:] ... that's what's...
[Julie:] Yeah, Vicki bought a birthday card for nanny when it comes round.
[Phil:] what I reckon, easy that, that easy to get that... far outright.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] ... uncle. There are! New baby.
[Shelly:] Oh and it's blue as well!
[Julie:] Yeah. I knew I'd got one somewhere.
[Gary:] That's from
[Vicki:] [cough]
[Phil:] That's the
[Julie:] I got a wedding... wedding day card there
[Phil:] that's the one.
[Julie:] you don't know anybody that's getting married do you?
[Phil:] I think that's. And our boys been there haven't they? Canada.
[Shelly:] Oh right!
[Gary:] This is fixing it innit?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] There was a
[Gary:] Aha.
[Phil:] charity match.
[Julie:] Got one haven't I?
[Gary:] Come on!
[Phil:] No.
[Julie:] No we, well you know I bought
[Sammy:] You you get the handle
[Julie:] who's some of that for?
[Sammy:] you get, hold onto the handle... no not there!
[Gary:] Erm... I'd like to see whoever wins this.
[Sammy:] Erm... making a car!
[Phil:] Can't wait to see their face!
[Julie:] Well my mum got it for
[Gary:] What, whichever gonna get mi, if somebody, they get a medal don't they?
[Julie:] Well mum, mum got me this when
[Phil:] It is
[Julie:] cos a friend of mine had a... baby and we thought it was gonna be a boy and she had another bloody girl!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] First!
[Julie:] She'd already bought the bloody card!
[Gary:] Cos there's only three lots been down in't there?
[Phil:] Four.
[Gary:] Oh well the French. then aren't they? Can't go any higher. Stu, they'll go down now look, you watch! Oh, they're second!
[Vicki:] A ca car go down. A car!
[Julie:] No it isn't granddad.
[Phil:] They're in the house now.
[Vicki:] A car!
[Sammy:] What?... Shut up!
[Vicki:] Mummy!
[Gary:] That's.
[Julie:] Yes.
[Vicki:] That was Vicki's
[Phil:] Eight point one of a second!
[Vicki:] car!
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Yes. It's my granddad's innit?
[Vicki:] Yeah! And Vicki's
[Gary:] Seventy six.
[Vicki:] !
[Gary:] Wait! They're getting slower!
[Vicki:] A A key... a
[Sammy:] Ah.
[Vicki:] Ah key ah key!
[Shelly:] How can you?
[Vicki:] He... Ah!
[Gary:] Which one's that of ours? The second England soon innit?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] the first.
[Vicki:] Daddy!
[Phil:] They were ninth weren't they?
[Gary:] Well they ain't gonna stay there long! We got all the big blokes to come yet! They got Vanden
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] What's his name?
[Julie:] Hang on a minute! Out the way a minute!
[Vicki:] Oh oh!
[Phil:] The German?
[Gary:] Popoloff, no what's his name?
[Phil:] Er
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Popoloff []!
[Phil:] Hopa.
[Gary:] Hopa.
[Phil:] I wonder if Hopa will get out of that?
[Gary:] They got bars up their sleeves in't they? The Hopa's of Germany.
[Phil:] Andy Pandy for... What was that?
[Julie:] That's a new one.
[Gary:] A slip.
[Julie:] Well it's a
[Vicki:] I see! Mummy! Mum!
[Phil:] Oh full points!
[Vicki:] [shouting] Mum! Mum []!
[Phil:] Cor! Not good! Or watch Kirsty.
[Gary:] Oh well it should be fun now, Kirsty!
[Julie:] Oh well
[Gary:] Tell.
[Julie:] Kirsty and Sam the other night, they were punching shit out of each other weren't they!
[Gary:] they plenty of ti, they got plenty
[Phil:] Where are they now?
[Gary:] It won't be all Kirsty now, they're in one already! Germany.
[Julie:] Carl will speak to Michael now.
[Gary:] Well di, did Andy want a boy?
[Julie:] No! He wanted another girl didn't he?
[Gary:] No, he wanted a boy.
[Julie:] No, cos Julie wanted a boy... and Andy wanted another girl!
[Gary:] He wanted a boy!
[Julie:] Well why did he say to me he wanted a girl?
[Gary:] I done, was having. Cos she was something one night, well said yeah that she wants more than, he wants more than two.
[Phil:] If it was a girl
[Vicki:] !
[Gary:] he'd have a
[Phil:] if it was another girl he would have another one.
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Vicki:] Yep!
[Gary:] Gently! I know you! Be nice!
[Julie:] Ooh ooh ooh ooh!
[Gary:] Vicki!
[Julie:] Gently! You little sod!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] oi!
[Julie:] Go and do it with your dolly, go on! Where is she? Go on I'll go and get her.
[Phil:] That's sick!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Disgusting innit []!
[Julie:] Mind your foot Vicki!
[Gary:] Come here!
[Sammy:] Keep still Vicki! Mind the chair!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Oh God []!
[Gary:] It's her! What is it about hair?
[Julie:] She didn't hear us!
[Phil:] Nearly!
[Gary:] She did! oi!
[Julie:] Gently! Oh! Give her that back!
[Gary:] Gently!
[Julie:] Go and play! Go on then! [shouting] No []!
[Vicki:] Get off!
[Gary:] Well let go then! Give it back to Stephanie... nicely! Come over here!
[Vicki:] [shouting] No []!
[Julie:] Who come see
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] you last night?
[Vicki:] Di.
[Julie:] No she didn't!
[Gary:] Fifty eight point
[Vicki:] Nana and granddad.
[Phil:] What is it gonna be?
[Vicki:] Di!
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] Take fifty three.
[Vicki:] No!
[Julie:] Who come to see you?
[Phil:] Fifty five
[Vicki:] Granddad.
[Phil:] fifty six, fifty seven, fifty eight
[Vicki:] Granddad
[Julie:] No, who's got a blue van? Well
[Gary:] That's three in one is it?
[Julie:] No Pete!
[Phil:] Just the three.
[Gary:] Three in one.
[Shelly:] Pete?
[Julie:] Uncle
[Gary:] Three in two.
[Vicki:] Stuart.
[Gary:] I got three in one to come yet! Banda! And they Hopa yet, for Germany.
[Phil:] This is Havvaher.
[Julie:] Gerald!
[Vicki:] Gerald.
[Sammy:] Gerald.
[Phil:] It's all on that fall.
[Vicki:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No this is one
[Vicki:] !
[Gary:] Yeah but is that Canada one or Canada?
[Julie:] No you're not having any sweets cos
[Phil:] It was Canada, was it Canada one or Canada two?
[Vicki:] Yes my okay.
[Julie:] Joe give, oh yeah Joe will give you sweets won't he?
[Vicki:] Ah! I like pee pee! Give me!
[Sammy:] Yes, yes we
[Phil:] Upset.
[Sammy:] gonna get them now.
[Gary:] Yeah?
[Shelly:] Go on then you'll be able to see mummy from work.
[Vicki:] Granddad.
[Gary:] I've been up the bath.
[Julie:] Oh yeah.
[Shelly:] He come home Thursday. Here are Phil. That's... what?
[Julie:] Has he got that thing going?
[Phil:] I don't wanna make.
[Shelly:] Yeah I think so.
[Vicki:] Nanny!
[Phil:] Yes.
[Shelly:] What?
[Julie:] Why have you got the sound up on the telly then?
[Shelly:] Philip!
[Gary:] Cos I'm listening to the kids.
[Shelly:] Philip! You and the bloody telly, he sat there with the ashtray in his hand and all bloody ash is falling out the bottom!
[Julie:] Just rub it in.
[Phil:] Who's that?
[Shelly:] Here are.
[Gary:] I dunno.... Is the guy with this?
[Phil:] Yeah. This is the Hopa, this German man.
[Vicki:] Weeee
[Gary:] No, this is a Swede!
[Julie:] You got a nappy on!
[Gary:] Bander.
[Vicki:] Oh!
[Gary:] No. They've already won a two man bobsleigh.
[Vicki:] Ha!
[Julie:] oi!
[Phil:] Yeah, that fucking England should have won that!
[Gary:] Well yeah but that's life innit?
[Phil:] Fucking so, Grundy, fucking
[Gary:] The
[Phil:] lost it all!
[Gary:] They're having fucking!
[Phil:] Thorpe wasn't too bad. For the first leg he was
[Julie:] Oh it's cold innit?
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Julie:] And really windy do you think?
[Gary:] The course was crap!
[Shelly:] That man coming to do
[Phil:] Here are look!
[Shelly:] my windows again Thursday.
[Sammy:] But I... but I
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Sammy:] hit eye.
[Phil:] And what about?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... You don't like him do you?
[Sammy:] No.
[Gary:] Which one?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] But they keep it. They keep the lead
[Julie:] Well
[Gary:] don't they? And they don't.
[Sammy:] Here are!
[Phil:] Most of them get back into it in a big way.
[Shelly:] Come and clean my windows and I owed him from the last time.
[Phil:] That's why they do it in the middle but it's
[Vicki:] Go on!
[Phil:] the first still.
[Vicki:] Car! Come and look!
[Sammy:] Ooh ee!
[Julie:] Mm.
[Vicki:] Gone.
[Gary:] He's harmless thought ain't he?
[Julie:] Yeah he's gone.
[Vicki:] I sit a mummy.
[Julie:] Don't you think it's horrible round here?
[Vicki:] Ooh!
[Sammy:] That is, this.
[Gary:] But he won't do them now! Not only that, if you paid thirty pound you could go down there couldn't you?
[Vicki:] Ah mummy!
[Phil:] There's a
[Julie:] Yeah?
[Phil:] I mean he wanted
[Gary:] Ah.
[Phil:] to keep them
[Gary:] Ah.
[Phil:] .
[Vicki:] ! Mummy!
[Phil:] They're not interested in them
[Julie:] Yeah?
[Phil:] now cos.
[Gary:] But the thing is you won't
[Phil:] They're seconds The thing is
[Julie:] So where's England? England's been knocked right down now haven't they?
[Phil:] Seventh.
[Vicki:] [shouting] Hey []!
[Julie:] Vicki! Vicki!
[Phil:] But erm... but the thing is... they ca, they co the blokes don't have to... behind don't see that much do they? They got their head down, see that
[Gary:] Right!
[Shelly:] Play with the other one Sam?
[Phil:] Here's Hopa!
[Vicki:] [crying]
[Phil:] See they got they're... head down all the time.
[Shelly:] Have to get out one of them dolls Phil. Gonna have to get one of them dolls, she loves them.
[Phil:] Yeah alright. Alright.
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Gary:] He's got hasn't he?
[Phil:] Oh yeah.
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Shelly:] Play with the other one!
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Shelly:] Look! Play with that one!
[Gary:] That one's nice over by there cos it's got the long hair.
[Julie:] Yeah but one's not gonna fit!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Gary:] Yep! I knocked out by four.
[Phil:] I'll play er... Germans.
[Julie:] I'm waiting for you.
[Gary:] Germans.
[Julie:] Even wait outside.
[Phil:] German's off!
[Vicki:] Mummy! [screaming] Ah []!
[Julie:] Vicki!
[Gary:] Where's she's going to? Where's she going?
[Vicki:] Not me!... [crying]
[Julie:] You're not to come down until baby!
[Vicki:] [crying]... Aye []?
[Gary:] said so.
[Phil:] Fifty eight point one.
[Shelly:] What about the baby look!! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Mm! Eight pound!
[Shelly:] Ooh! That's a weight of
[Gary:] Did you tell her we'll wait here?
[Phil:] I'm waiting here so
[Vicki:] But ma mummy!
[Shelly:] Don't you think so? We left off eight pound and
[Vicki:] Mummy!
[Shelly:] at three and a half months!
[Phil:] Yeah, I mean personally.
[Vicki:] She.
[Julie:] She. That's right.
[Sammy:] It's!
[Julie:] Oh you want in that do you?
[Gary:] Think so.
[Shelly:] Right.
[Phil:] No! Going in all over... that's the position anyway!
[Julie:] There are Phil
[Phil:] That's from last night.
[Julie:] if I give you that four.
[Shelly:] Alright.
[Vicki:] Vicki!
[Julie:] Mm mm!
[Vicki:] Wee wee!
[Phil:] Is that for me?
[Julie:] That's for your sister.
[Shelly:] There you go! Oop!
[Phil:] Had my
[Shelly:] Ah shit on my foot!
[Phil:] cos I was late.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Vicki:] Wee wee!
[Shelly:] Do you see Brookside last night?
[Julie:] No! No cos he don't let me watch it!
[Gary:] Crap!
[Julie:] You don't!
[Gary:] It wasn't me last night! That's crap!
[Shelly:] Why don't you watch it?
[Phil:] last night.
[Sammy:] Urgh! Hello!
[Shelly:] It was good!
[Gary:] Then I do normally watch it with you. You didn't watch it last night.
[Julie:] Only Mondays.
[Gary:] Your lying again
[Phil:] Well
[Gary:] again to me!
[Julie:] I'm not allowed to Wednesdays cos your mum don't watch it on a Wednesday!
[Gary:] Well that's nothing to do with me! You can't blame me
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh that's nice []!
[Gary:] then can you? Can't blame me for that!
[Phil:] Er... end of. Cos she was would she? cake
[Gary:] Who? Cake? No!
[Phil:] for her birthday.
[Julie:] Yeah, a big cake.
[Phil:] Got her some. Said Happy Birthday
[Julie:] Well na we, they the cake and er... she wouldn't... wouldn't sit down so... Terry kept saying to her right now what you doing? She said, hang on
[Vicki:] Wee wee!
[Julie:] a minute!
[Phil:] They come right up.
[Julie:] Called us all in the lounge... and gave us a bottle of Taboo
[Phil:] back in with her, like.
[Julie:] and about that much left in the bottle... so er
[Phil:] Seventy mile an hour.
[Julie:] went and got the lemonade... so I was tipping it in, so Terry goes, he goes I'll have it all!
[Vicki:] Urgh!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... Throw us a drink!
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah, one point two.
[Julie:] Gerald come in and he said you been on the piss already? I said am I hell! I said I gotta be bloody sober!
[Gary:] You didn't you get?
[Shelly:] You got cake as well then?
[Julie:] Yeah! Bought me a chocolate... sponge thing. Oh... Gary and... me and
[Phil:] I feel
[Julie:] her and Vicki had a piece.
[Phil:] And he said, yeah take what.
[Julie:] And I said, well I'll put it back in the fridge and she said no, she said take it home she said
[Gary:] Yeah but
[Julie:] I bought it for you.
[Gary:] when you're thinking about it it's not even a second out.
[Shelly:] What's wrong with her?
[Julie:] So then she come round and she said I don't even do this for Karen!
[Phil:] Another one down there.
[Julie:] She said Karen wouldn't be very happy if she found out!
[Gary:] Ooh yes! If she finds out.
[Julie:] I said, but who's gonna tell her? Who me?
[Phil:] It's a lot innit Ga?
[Julie:] So I thought well... I'm not!
[Gary:] What?
[Phil:] It's a lot in this innit?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah! And then she said er... when she
[Phil:] All that!
[Julie:] come home from work... she said I've been looking round in Boots and that for you, she said er... I've decided, she said I was gonna get you a gift voucher.
[Gary:] Twice you've just I'm watching you two!
[Julie:] for for Marks and Spencers or
[Phil:] Ah?
[Julie:] somewhere like that... she said, but I've er decided not to, she said I'll give you the money on Saturday if that's alright?
[Phil:] Only.
[Gary:] You mean what I said
[Julie:] So I said er... but I know you're off to Torquay on Friday with Di, cos that's him hinting, thank God it's out!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] So she said er
[Gary:] After calling me a bastard and all this now
[Julie:] so she I, I'll sort you out on Saturday! So
[Shelly:] What
[Gary:] Ah!
[Shelly:] next Saturday?
[Julie:] Ooh! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You love them really don't you?
[Julie:] So she said er... it won't only be fiver cos she said
[Gary:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] you can't get a lot with a fiver.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] So I thought well!
[Gary:] Put it back!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Probably five pound fifty []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []! Yeah! I thought about that!
[Gary:] Listen no wonder he's world champion he can go afford to skiing, his dad's a multi-millionaire!
[Julie:] But er... no, we were talking and she said if I give you the money you won't go and spend it on the
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] kids will you? I said, you gotta be [LAUGHTER] joking []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I said, I normally do
[Gary:] He's loaded ain't he?
[Julie:] but I said no, this time I said
[Phil:] He goes for it don't he?
[Julie:] not likely!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Mm. With Vicki just having her birthday she's got all she needs now isn't it?
[Julie:] Well that's it and....
[Gary:] But she hasn't got a helicopter.
[Shelly:] You leave him alone! Leave him alone!
[Sammy:] I want a!
[Shelly:] ?
[Julie:] No, I'll go and spend it in one myself.
[Gary:] That's alright. You'll have to off to do something like that, communal
[Sammy:] I want a wee wee!
[Julie:] And Di will be really pissed off
[Gary:] Anyway
[Julie:] by the time we've walked round all them shops!
[Gary:] Ooh! Ooh! Ooh ooh ooh ooh!
[Phil:] Just there on the last
[Gary:] No!
[Phil:] ain't he?
[Sammy:] I want a wee wee!
[Julie:] Well how come
[Gary:] Yeah they're just showing some of the mistakes as well the windy down. Ooh! Here comes the
[Sammy:] I want a wee wee! I want a
[Vicki:] Sammy wants a wee wee!
[Gary:] Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
[Shelly:] You fellers I'll get up!
[Gary:] Ooh! He's gonna do the sound effects! Down... down and out.
[Vicki:] Wee wee! Wee!
[Julie:] Wee wee! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] See him.
[Gary:] No, no.
[Shelly:] Do it yourself!
[Gary:] Yeah, he's alright.
[Shelly:] Go away!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[Shelly:] Go away you! Go away!
[Phil:] Well won yesterday
[Julie:] Aye!
[Phil:] to the, the
[Julie:] No!
[Sammy:] But th
[Shelly:] Wee wee.
[Julie:] No, you don't want a wee wee cos I have to go.
[Sammy:] A wee wee!
[Shelly:] No, you don't! You got a nappy on!
[Sammy:] Ooh!
[Gary:] Oh a big miss of that gear though innit?
[Shelly:] Where's daddy? Where's daddy?
[Julie:] Bet your popular with Nanny!
[Phil:] I am aren't I?
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Julie:] What is it?
[Shelly:] Get up!
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Gary:] You love it really don't you?
[Julie:] Oh, what?
[Gary:] The hole in the head, ain't you?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Come on Phil!
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Phil:] Alright then.
[Julie:] It's alright Phil, I'll have him.
[Sammy:] [crying]
[Phil:] You mean... aye?
[Julie:] Yes, his next month out of his wages!
[Shelly:] Listen to me! Shut up!
[Julie:] Can't get no birthday money out of him!
[Gary:] Who?
[Shelly:] Hurry up Phil!
[Julie:] Any of yours?
[Gary:] What thing?
[Julie:] You shouldn't put there.
[Gary:] Yeah, but yeah I do say so!
[Sammy:] Come on daddy!
[Julie:] Tomorrow morning, go down to Marks and come back for my wages.
[Gary:] Oh that's alright then.
[Shelly:] My twenty five percent here... cor that'll be an expensive month!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... I've already had mine.
[Gary:] You'll get this and nothing more!
[Vicki:] And you
[Julie:] Wow!
[Vicki:] will get this and
[Julie:] for twenty five pounds, aye? [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Well I'd better go and get changed hadn't I?
[Shelly:] Twenty four!
[Vicki:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Shall I go and have a wash now? We're ready then? We're ready!
[Julie:] I've only gotta change
[Gary:] Ready?
[Julie:] him. Just have to.
[Gary:] So we'll see you later!
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] What time?
[Gary:] We'll be about
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] No I was to co...
[Julie:] There's no black.
[Shelly:] Yeah! That's right.
[Gary:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] There's no black.
[Phil:] Got the there?
[Shelly:] We can still play
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] play with bank and then erm
[Gary:] Right! Kick arse! We're gonna kick arse! Who's first then?
[Phil:] Cor he's just the same!
[Gary:] Dot with, go fir don't we? Yeah.
[Shelly:] Whoever gets the highest dot can go
[Gary:] Can I borrow your ashtray?
[Shelly:] clockwise from there.
[Julie:] Here are.
[Gary:] Are you two keeping the ashtray?
[Julie:] No. Alright?
[Phil:] There the I better grab hold of it. I got one here.
[Shelly:] Oh he's got one.
[Gary:] [belch] Ooh pardon me!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] They're gonna wonder what the hell they're listening to, ha []!
[Gary:] Right.
[Julie:] That's alright. So I Gary, gotta swap tapes alright?
[Shelly:] Don't be swine! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What we doing then?
[Shelly:] Ten thousand pound.
[Julie:] So, you found a new one is it?
[Shelly:] It's only half there.
[Gary:] He had it going for a while.
[Julie:] I know but that's
[Gary:] I'll keep my eye on it.
[Julie:] that's only side B innit?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Mm.
[Gary:] Yeah, cos I su
[Phil:] Yeah it is.
[Gary:] scrubbed out all the erm... the bath antics and all that! Couldn't hear nothing for splashing!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Come on then! It's what? Where's the start?
[Gary:] Your leg ke kept
[Julie:] Erm
[Gary:] knocking against the side of the bath.
[Shelly:] There!
[Phil:] Start of graduation, right.
[Shelly:] I'll be the little house then.
[Julie:] I'll be
[Phil:] Gary's
[Julie:] the re, I'll be the
[Phil:] Gary's the boat are you?
[Julie:] if you like?
[Gary:] I'm the ca, I'm... the boat, yeah, King rat!
[Phil:] Well that's it.
[Shelly:] Oh thanks
[Gary:] Oh the
[Shelly:] Phil!
[Gary:] Trouble is our bath Ju it's not big enough we'll get a bigger bath won't we?
[Julie:] Mm mm mm. Saying nothing!
[Phil:] Go on then.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Phil:] I can't see all the way over the way tu tu
[Julie:] Four
[Phil:] Aye?
[Shelly:] Is there a lighter over there?
[Phil:] If it's double do I get a second go?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Dunno.
[Shelly:] No!
[Gary:] No!
[Phil:] Don't you get two goes for a double?
[Gary:] No!
[Phil:] It's not like Monopoly then?
[Shelly:] Yeah when you start the actual game you do.
[Gary:] Do you?
[Phil:] Oh so as I get another chance then?
[Shelly:] No you don't! Not on this one.
[Phil:] So I got four.
[Shelly:] Now you can have a go.
[Gary:] Is this for... highest score?
[Shelly:] This is who
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] starts
[Gary:] Have you been?
[Julie:] No, Phil has!
[Gary:] Well, he's going that way ain't he? He's cocked it up! Don't matter well
[Phil:] Alright! Alright! You start first!
[Julie:] No you don't go
[Shelly:] Ah, only cos you got a low score!
[Gary:] No he's... his counts as four.
[Julie:] Seven.
[Gary:] Seven. Right.
[Julie:] Mm mm.
[Gary:] Going clo, clockwise?
[Shelly:] Doesn't matter which wa, that is clockwise!
[Phil:] Don't matter
[Gary:] That's right! So, you were doing it right you prat!
[Shelly:] Six.
[Julie:] Phil was right!
[Gary:] Mm.
[Shelly:] And then... whoever gets the highest starts on there and goes clockwise.
[Julie:] Four.
[Gary:] Four. Oh
[Julie:] Right.
[Gary:] yes!
[Julie:] Gary!
[Shelly:] So it's Gary
[Gary:] Right!
[Julie:] You.
[Shelly:] going this way innit?
[Gary:] Going that way now?
[Phil:] Well that works out alright
[Julie:] No!
[Phil:] anyway Ga... Gary had seven
[Julie:] Erm
[Phil:] and you had six.
[Julie:] No!
[Phil:] Four, four.
[Julie:] Clockwise!
[Gary:] Have I got, I'm going that way.
[Phil:] Is that the way it goes is it?
[Shelly:] I don't know which way you go!
[Gary:] Clockwise!
[Shelly:] Which way do you go?
[Phil:] I would have said that way.
[Julie:] Well you normally go
[Gary:] No, I'd have said clockwise.
[Julie:] normally go clockwise don't you?
[Shelly:] Yeah. Cos you don't start right next to those... don't go straight across the racecourse.
[Gary:] Right here we go then!
[Julie:] that way don't you?
[Gary:] Stop the chit-chat! Let's go for it!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Seven.
[Phil:] Don't forget it's, no cos it's a.
[Gary:] Gift from dad, collect a hundred pound.
[Phil:] What do you say?
[Julie:] Oh you big head!
[Shelly:] I missed that!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] What did you say []?
[Shelly:] Oh hold on! What are we gonna
[Phil:] Don't forget it's
[Shelly:] do?
[Phil:] You gotta go round
[Shelly:] Two
[Phil:] once!
[Shelly:] you gotta earn two... things... and
[Gary:] Yeah?
[Shelly:] five thousand pound and either a... the diploma or a membership.
[Gary:] That's right! Before you can go up.
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Gary:] That's right!
[Shelly:] And then
[Julie:] Unless you land
[Shelly:] five
[Julie:] on... that.
[Gary:] Unless you land on
[Shelly:] So it's five thousand and two for that one, and ten thousand and two for that one. What are we setting the... end for? Fifty thousand?
[Gary:] Well it says the... No!
[Julie:] No, cos you only have to go round five times don't you?
[Phil:] Ten thousand.
[Gary:] Don't matter! You do it as you says don't you?
[Shelly:] Unless you set a time or something. Cos then go
[Julie:] It can't be ten, I mean you collect ten thousand as you
[Shelly:] Every time you go round, so that's five times round.
[Gary:] Yeah, but that's why we done it though weren't it? Or didn't you wanna do it like that? I don't mind!
[Shelly:] Cos you gotta set a target now before
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Well we've only got
[Shelly:] we start.
[Phil:] one thousand anyway! Two thousand.
[Shelly:] Yeah, you need five thousand to get up into there.
[Phil:] Aha.
[Shelly:] And then you need ten thousand to get from there to there.
[Phil:] So, twenty thousand.
[Gary:] Well you lot make
[Shelly:] No! Cos you only have to go round twice cos you collect ten thousand when you pass there! And
[Phil:] Say twenty thousand!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... That's ten times round innit?
[Gary:] Up to you!
[Shelly:] Yeah, that's easier
[Phil:] Say
[Shelly:] cos it's only a small board innit?
[Julie:] Hundred thousand?
[Gary:] Still takes a while though dunnit? Cos you keep going round!
[Phil:] Say fifty thousand.
[Shelly:] Alright, fifty.
[Gary:] Fifty thousand.
[Julie:] Alright.
[Shelly:] Ooh! About quarter past nine at [LAUGHTER] []!
[Phil:] Do we want the five on or not? No?
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] Just pass.
[Shelly:] Gotta go round once before you can buy.
[Gary:] That's right!
[Julie:] Mm.
[Shelly:] Same as... thingy. Is that the same on all... different games?
[Gary:] Yeah all board
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] games innit. Same with Monopoly or
[Shelly:] But even when you go up you gotta go round once before you buy as well haven't you?
[Julie:] Mm, I suppose.
[Gary:] Mm. What's that? Mm. A, yeah you gotta say you're going up. You say yo
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Gary:] I'm going to the higher class or whatever
[Phil:] Yes.
[Gary:] it is.
[Julie:] Yeah, you say it... after one go and you go up to the next go don't you?
[Phil:] Is that right?
[Gary:] No.
[Phil:] Six.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.
[Phil:] Your go Ga!
[Julie:] We've all got the same money. Started off with a thousand pound, two thousand pound.
[Gary:] No I'm not, no it's not that I'm thinking of.... Ten.... What's that? Nothing exciting!
[Julie:] It's a beauty shop.
[Shelly:] Twelve. Oh shit! Oh I wanted that football pools! Got eighteen and a half today on the pools! Six, seven, eight!
[Gary:] Lot of score draws in that weren't there? Lot of no fo
[Shelly:] You have a go on that.
[Gary:] Lot of no-score draws weren't there?
[Julie:] Now then, I can't remember what do you do! Erm
[Gary:] What's that?
[Shelly:] You can make that... and put down as much as you want and then you roll the dice.
[Phil:] Mm. Then you got it more than three times.
[Gary:] That's right, you can only do a pair or something.
[Julie:] [sighing] Oh []!
[Gary:] Is this your pairs?
[Julie:] Normally seven or an eight innit?
[Gary:] Well what yo, it's up to you innit?
[Julie:] No, that was what we used to do weren't it?
[Gary:] Yeah, we used to, yeah.
[Julie:] Well, cos I'm a bit I ain't got much at the moment, I'll have hundred pound on
[Shelly:] Two.
[Julie:] seven.
[Gary:] Go for it!
[Phil:] On seven.
[Gary:] Get three attempts don't you?
[Phil:] Six
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] the first time innit?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Shelly:] Yep! Throw three.
[Julie:] Two to one, and then one to one. Shit!
[Gary:] Nine.
[Julie:] Nine!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Three.
[Gary:] Whoa!
[Julie:] Five.
[Shelly:] Where does that hundred go then?
[Julie:] In the bank.
[Phil:] In the, in the bank.
[Shelly:] Oh right!
[Gary:] Does dunnit?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Gary:] Do you remember?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] I think you put it in the middle and then... so like
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] if you land on a certain square [LAUGHTER] you can keep it []!
[Gary:] No that's only
[Shelly:] That's what you do in Monopoly! If you put all the fines and that in the middle if you land on free parking you can keep it.
[Gary:] What's that one say?
[Shelly:] Collect wages, two hundred pound.
[Gary:] Yeah, you ain't gone past it yet.
[Julie:] No! It don't matter!
[Gary:] Don't matter!
[Julie:] Should have it when you land on it.
[Gary:] Like there,
[Julie:] Or if you go past it.
[Gary:] Then you try and get you see.
[Phil:] Collect wages. Ah, you gotta go past it to collect wages.
[Gary:] Nine.
[Shelly:] Ooh ha!
[Gary:] What's that?
[Shelly:] Well away from the wedding! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] mine. from mine.
[Gary:] From the wedding you can go straight up can't you?
[Julie:] Yep! But then you're absolutely skint when you get up there if you go straight
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Julie:] away!
[Phil:] Two, three... why you gotta get some money before we go up there then?
[Shelly:] Well you haven't got to! If you land on it you gotta go up!
[Julie:] Eight. Six, seven, eight.
[Gary:] [belch]
[Phil:] Eight.
[Gary:] Pardon me!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven... eight. Yeah.
[Gary:] Four.
[Shelly:] Phil used to wait till I landed on the wedding
[Gary:] What's that? Collect
[Julie:] Good night at bingo collect hundred pound!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... That's what you'd like innit Phil? Pat took home erm...
[Gary:] Yeah I heard about this.
[Shelly:] four hundred and twenty five quid she won!
[Gary:] Yeah, the other week
[Julie:] Did she?
[Gary:] weren't it? And they shared it
[Shelly:] last week.
[Gary:] between them weren't it?
[Shelly:] No.
[Phil:] Am I having two dice?
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, one, two, three, four, five. No it's not to go together is it? Or is it?
[Gary:] No!
[Shelly:] Don't know.
[Phil:] No!
[Shelly:] And that was, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.
[Gary:] We'll have to arrange that Phil.
[Shelly:] !
[Gary:] Eight.
[Julie:] Steal most of the food!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Want some more? This lovely!
[Shelly:] I ain't drank it yet!
[Gary:] That good is it?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's there look!
[Gary:] Still ice in there as well, you might as well have them!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] , inherit two hundred, miss a turn... business lunch. What does that mean?
[Shelly:] You inherit two hundred pound and you don't get your next go!
[Gary:] Go on then!
[Shelly:] Have you found out any?
[Gary:] Somebody's died see! Somebody's died, that's why!
[Shelly:] Phil?
[Phil:] What?
[Shelly:] Found out how granddad is today?
[Phil:] No.
[Gary:] My go?
[Julie:] Mm mm.
[Phil:] That's four, now someone's gonna go.
[Julie:] And Gary's dad wouldn't know!
[Phil:] You gotta land on that to get
[Gary:] Yeah you miss your next go!
[Shelly:] No! You gotta go
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] pass it.
[Julie:] To pass it.
[Phil:] So you got two hundred?
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Phil:] Stop here!
[Gary:] Graduation day Phil.
[Julie:] And you can buy now.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Gary:] We could all buy now couldn't we?
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] Phillip can't cos he's gotta miss a go!
[Julie:] I can't.
[Phil:] Your go.
[Julie:] Oh my go is it?
[Phil:] Eight.
[Julie:] Eight.
[Gary:] Eight.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
[Shelly:] You can start buying now.
[Gary:] Olive's Jewellery.
[Shelly:] Er a hundred pound.
[Gary:] Quartz watch, a hundred pound. Hire purchase is twenty.
[Julie:] You haven't got the cards though have you Shel?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah go on then!
[Shelly:] Or even if I haven't, Oh I've got them haven't I? Cos you pay me that! Ha! Ha! Thank you!
[Phil:] So what do you get all the... cards from?
[Shelly:] Gotta have two of the cards
[Gary:] Need that first.
[Shelly:] and the money, and then a diploma or a membership card to go up. Yep!
[Phil:] Just two of the cards? You don't have to have them all at one time?
[Shelly:] No. Just
[Julie:] Yeah, but what happens if there were som, if somebody landed on it?
[Shelly:] Dunno!
[Gary:] Nothing!
[Julie:] Oh nothing? It's not that?
[Gary:] All you gotta do, you gotta get from there to there to there... and the one who gets there and gets a hundred thousand or whatever it is innit?
[Shelly:] Fifty thousand we set it up to.
[Gary:] Oh! Fifty thousand.
[Shelly:] They win don't they?
[Gary:] They win! Is it fifty thousand? Yeah, it's enough innit?, mm mm mm
[Shelly:] Remember I used to go
[Gary:] mm mm mm mm mm mm mm.
[Shelly:] up to there, I always used to land on a bloody divorce!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Black's Art Gallery, I'll buy it!
[Shelly:] Well we haven't got the cards for that but you can still buy it and I'll give you... a credit card or something to use instead.
[Gary:] Yeah, whatever! What is it, twenty innit?
[Shelly:] So if you just use it like that then at least it shows you've got a card.
[Julie:] Hundred. Hundred!
[Phil:] Hundred.
[Gary:] So it is!
[Shelly:] And you get twenty back don't you, when you sell them back to the bank... or whoever?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Four. One, two, three, four. Ooh I'll buy one of them!
[Phil:] You can make the cards
[Julie:] What's that?
[Shelly:] Fifty pounds worth of tuition. Cos I need one of them, that's, what's that, a membership or a... no, it's a diploma innit? Right, I'll have one of. I need one of them.
[Julie:] Seven. One, two, three
[Shelly:] Yeah!
[Julie:] four, five, six, seven. Ooh twenty times
[Shelly:] Put
[Julie:] twenty times roll of both dice!
[Shelly:] Both dice? Bloody hell!
[Gary:] No!.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Want a big one here []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Must have three or four now.
[Julie:] Twenty, twenty
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh bloody hell []!
[Phil:] Three.
[Gary:] Twenty times?
[Julie:] Three. That's only sixty innit?
[Phil:] Sixty pounds.
[Julie:] Yeah, twenty times... roll of both dice.
[Shelly:] There you go!
[Phil:] I get
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Thank you very much!
[Gary:] You've had that all time though Ju, ain't you?
[Phil:] Five.
[Julie:] What's that?
[Gary:] Low scores when you come on that one.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah. Used to have that wi
[Phil:] Stock exchange.
[Shelly:] That's that one. The person on your left throws it for you. Gary.
[Phil:] Yeah. And what
[Shelly:] So if you wanna put like a hundred or something on
[Gary:] It's up to you what you put in on the sto, stock exchange.
[Shelly:] then Gary throws it
[Phil:] Go on then.
[Shelly:] and he can have up to three goes. Like, if he gets two you lose all of it... but if he rolls a twelve you get your hundred pound back plus ten times that amount.
[Phil:] So what number do, do I have choose a number?
[Shelly:] You don't choose a number.
[Gary:] You don't choose a number? That's right!
[Shelly:] No.
[Julie:] No, he don't choose
[Shelly:] You just throw it.
[Julie:] a number you just throw it. He's put in a hundred so whatever... you throw
[Shelly:] Gotta work it out then.
[Gary:] You know how to do this girls?
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Phil:] Just one go?
[Shelly:] No, you can have up to three goes. Four. Lose a third of your investment.
[Phil:] So that's er... yeah.
[Shelly:] Seventy five quid.
[Gary:] What do you wanna do? Do you want me to go again?
[Shelly:] I'd go on it. But change that
[Phil:] That's!
[Shelly:] Oh shit!
[Phil:] That's! Thirty five.
[Julie:] No he don't have to go for that
[Gary:] No.
[Julie:] does he?
[Gary:] He can,yo can, you get three goes at it.
[Julie:] He don't have to pick
[Phil:] Oh!
[Julie:] he doesn't have to go for that.
[Phil:] No I've got three goes.
[Gary:] You can, you ca you
[Julie:] He's got three goes.
[Gary:] You got three goes.
[Julie:] And it's up to him
[Gary:] And it's up to you. Do you wanna go on
[Julie:] Go again.
[Gary:] and see if I can get higher
[Phil:] Go again.
[Gary:] for you?
[Phil:] Go on!
[Julie:] Six.
[Gary:] Six.
[Shelly:] Six.
[Gary:] I got six.
[Shelly:] Lose a quarter of it.
[Phil:] No, go again.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] You'll probably a twelve []!
[Gary:] Nine!
[Phil:] Nine.
[Julie:] Nine!
[Shelly:] Plus equal amounts. So you keep that
[Gary:] Plus.
[Shelly:] and you get hundred pound of that. Jammy bastard!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] My go next. Twat dice!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Mike used to do that didn't he, to me? I used to lose all mine!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] ... Not very good! But though is it? What's that?
[Julie:] No, how many have you gone?
[Gary:] I went.
[Shelly:] Mm. Gonna have to start changing up the hundreds cos we've run out in the bank.
[Phil:] He can go up now!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] He can go up if he wanted to couldn't he?
[Shelly:] Now, there's five of
[Gary:] Change this.
[Shelly:] mine.
[Julie:] No cos he hasn't
[Shelly:] One, two
[Julie:] got erm
[Shelly:] three, four, five.
[Julie:] he ain't got two
[Gary:] Cos I'll have a
[Julie:] two cards or a diploma or a
[Shelly:] Change that
[Julie:] membership.
[Shelly:] Does anyone else wanna change up any hundreds cos we're erm... getting a bit short!
[Julie:] Ha!
[Phil:] Got loads of them here!
[Shelly:] Oh yeah! Big head!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] How many... did we start off with?
[Julie:] I've got
[Shelly:] Four.
[Julie:] I've only got four.
[Shelly:] That's alright.
[Phil:] Six
[Shelly:] And I've changed that five
[Phil:] seven
[Shelly:] of mine.
[Phil:] eight
[Gary:] Plus five.
[Phil:] nine, ten. I got ten.
[Shelly:] Well you don't wanna change them all do you?
[Phil:] No, I'll change five. Alright?
[Shelly:] This gives us some more back in the bank. Make sure it's only one I'm giving him!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Another... there's another five.
[Shelly:] How many does that leave you with then?
[Gary:] None! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yeah but you wanna keep some in case you land on the
[Gary:] In case?
[Shelly:] stock exchange.
[Gary:] I've gotta get my two hundred first
[Phil:] Shel!
[Gary:] haven't I?
[Phil:] Did I just
[Shelly:] I just gave you it!
[Gary:] Oh did you?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Shel!
[Gary:] Aye I just give you five so how can you give me [LAUGHTER] two hundred []?
[Phil:] Yeah, that gives you six.
[Shelly:] Mm!
[Gary:] Ah! Ha, ha ha!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I didn't
[Gary:] Honest Phil, yeah!
[Phil:] I didn't.
[Shelly:] Hold on! Gary's given five, I gave five, and there was one left in there... so that's one, two
[Gary:] Oh aye!
[Shelly:] three... ooh, three
[Phil:] No, I've only got this!
[Shelly:] four, five. That's Gary's five, that's
[Phil:] That's Gary's five innit?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Three, four, five.
[Gary:] I know you!
[Shelly:] That's my five. One, two, three, four
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] no, that's mine!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] And you give five []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] That's right.
[Gary:] They're trying it on again!
[Phil:] Two hundred. Another hundred, that's... that's how it was before?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Oh! That's right, sorry!
[Shelly:] Thank you!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Sorry!
[Shelly:] Cor! Trying to con were you?
[Phil:] Well I counted ten!
[Gary:] Aha. [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I like you!
[Phil:] How, how can you have ten? Aye?
[Gary:] I've been round once more than you?
[Julie:] Cor! I'll have a go on that!
[Gary:] No, I had that hundred didn't I? I had that extra hundred for the erm
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Gary:] for granddad or whatever it was or something weren't it? Granddad's birthday or something.
[Julie:] Go for eleven.
[Shelly:] Ooh! Will you now!
[Phil:] How did they get so far in front of me!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Throw them off the board on purpose and, you know... you lose all your money!
[Shelly:] Shall I take both of one of them?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] You pass it to the... two blokes. The only two blokes in the game.
[Shelly:] Do you want that or eleven?
[Julie:] Eleven.
[Gary:] Don't she? Aye? Right! Throw the dice off the
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Ooh []!
[Gary:] table twice
[Julie:] Oh Gary, shut up!
[Gary:] you lose all your money and give it to me and Phil!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Is that right []?
[Julie:] Well ain't bloody on is it! They are!
[Gary:] We used to gang up on our Ju, didn't we
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Gary:] darling?
[Shelly:] Five to one, so that's only five hundred quid innit?
[Julie:] Hm mm.
[Shelly:] Ooh ooh!
[Phil:] Jammy devil!
[Julie:] I like this game!
[Gary:] That weren't fair really because
[Julie:] Three.
[Gary:] you cheated then!
[Julie:] Ooh! One, two, three. I'll have one of them!
[Gary:] She cheated Phil didn't she? That's why!
[Shelly:] What's that? Membership, fifty pound.
[Gary:] Ooh country club! Oh she's going posh!
[Phil:] How did they get in front?
[Shelly:] Well you had to miss a go
[Phil:] Yeah, but I was
[Julie:] You did. You miss a go.
[Phil:] I was up with you lot then.
[Gary:] No, you missed a go because of you got that two hundred pound.
[Phil:] Yeah, but I was still up with them two! Cos I had the highest score.
[Shelly:] Yeah, but you're a go and we've been to.
[Gary:] Did you want any, anybody want any crisps yet or not?
[Shelly:] No I haven't even finished
[Julie:] There's some crisps down there!
[Shelly:] my sandwiches yet!
[Phil:] Seven. One
[Shelly:] Pickles there! Pickled onions if you want them.
[Phil:] No.
[Gary:] Get the pickle out then.
[Phil:] I can't buy it cos Gary's gone up.
[Shelly:] You can! There's more than one!
[Gary:] There's more than one.
[Phil:] [belch] Buy it then!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [belch] Buy it then!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... They're gonna think we're a right bunch of swearing pigs on there!
[Gary:] Is it still going?
[Julie:] Mm. Alright if I smoke?
[Gary:] No, because I've
[Shelly:] Right! Who's go is it?
[Gary:] I've
[Shelly:] Gary's go.
[Gary:] Did quite a bit of it
[Shelly:] It's your go Ga!
[Gary:] this morning didn't I? That's why you didn't hear... any of the bobsleigh... cos I had the bloody thing going
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] just as a dummy run.
[Julie:] Yeah, and I thought you said that you'd scrapped all that?
[Gary:] No, I... started again didn't I? Didn't I Phil? Cos, who was it who said to me... are you taping us? Cos
[Shelly:] Me.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah, I thought something was going on cos you left the sound
[Phil:] Ten.
[Julie:] down.
[Gary:] Six. One, two, three, that's right, four. What's that?
[Shelly:] Green furniture.
[Gary:] Yeah go on, I'll have a bit of that She!
[Phil:] He's gotta get... two of one
[Julie:] Hundred pound.
[Phil:] type.
[Shelly:] Ooh a microwave oven!
[Gary:] Ooh a microwave!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Gary:] I've always wanted!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] No.
[Julie:] Two of anything innit?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] It's not er... two of just one
[Shelly:] No, it's two of anything.
[Julie:] two of anything Phil. But you've gotta have either a night school or a... you gotta have a diploma or a membership, plus all the money.
[Shelly:] I know!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh she's got []
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] No, you got a microwave []!
[Phil:] I thought you had to have both?
[Gary:] I was gonna say, I'm
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] honest, I was gonna give
[Julie:] Only one.
[Gary:] it to you. Is that and? Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah. Why you take it off my pile did you?
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] No, I couldn't reach your pile []!
[Shelly:] I know I've only got two there anyway! I think? Yeah. Ooh eleven again! Shit! Why couldn't I have had that last time!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, ah! [singing] Dum, doo doo doo []! Where do I go to?
[Julie:] Over there.
[Phil:] Divorce! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yeah, that's what I land on nearly every time!
[Gary:] She's gone up now.
[Shelly:] Aha. Oh shit! That means I gotta sell this back!
[Julie:] I was gonna say and change you
[Shelly:] How much do I want erm
[Gary:] Yes, you gotta... that.
[Shelly:] You just give them back don't you.
[Gary:] No, you can sell somebody
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] who needs them.
[Julie:] You can sell to somebody that wants them.
[Shelly:] Anyone wanna bid for it?
[Julie:] No, I've got mine.
[Gary:] Aye, where's my card! I didn't get, oh there's my card!
[Phil:] Yeah, I'll I'll bid for that.
[Gary:] What is it?
[Phil:] I'll bid for that.
[Shelly:] Diploma.
[Phil:] It's a diploma.
[Julie:] So you
[Gary:] How much?
[Julie:] could get that
[Gary:] Yeah!
[Julie:] as well!
[Gary:] I'll give you twenty for it!
[Shelly:] How much you give me for it?
[Phil:] Thirty. Mm!
[Gary:] I'll go hundred.
[Julie:] Yeah, but you gotta remember
[Shelly:] You could buy it for fifty!
[Julie:] you gotta remember you can buy them for fifty if you land on it.
[Gary:] That's true, yeah.
[Shelly:] So Shel can sell it for a lot more than that.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] Cos if you remember Mike used to go to bloody stupid
[Gary:] Yeah but he he he well he
[Julie:] five hundred didn't he?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] he probably thought he was it because he was the new salesman, salesman director and I used to take the piss out of him!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] And we'd turn round and say well keep it! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] What have got, go up to?
[Gary:] I'll go to hundred.
[Phil:] Go on then.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I don't thi, I didn't buy any property either did I?
[Julie:] Aye! Excuse me I'm!
[Gary:] So that means, what do I need now then? Diploma?
[Julie:] I'm you!
[Gary:] Would I get a ta... Aye! You took two there didn't you?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I didn't! I took one []!
[Gary:] aargh. I know your type.
[Shelly:] You now owe me five thousand pound and you can go up into the middle.
[Gary:] That's what I've fucking always wanted!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What I need is
[Phil:] Once you get on the wedding!
[Gary:] Either
[Julie:] Seven.
[Gary:] that or high society.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five six, seven.
[Gary:] Country club! I need Country club then don't I?
[Shelly:] No, you'll need one or the other.
[Julie:] Shel
[Gary:] I got that, I put that
[Julie:] what have I got?
[Gary:] and I've got a credit card!
[Phil:] Got one of those.
[Shelly:] No, one of the two
[Julie:] I'll have one of those Shel.
[Shelly:] things.
[Gary:] But that's a credit card!
[Julie:] Well if you give me
[Shelly:] Well it's only cash!
[Gary:] That could buy me in!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Oh!
[Julie:] If you give me a hundred... and then... I, that's my hundred from
[Shelly:] Oh right!
[Julie:] there innit?
[Shelly:] Yep!
[Gary:] Yeah but count
[Shelly:] Ooh I didn't collect mine when I went past either did I?
[Gary:] Yeah but Shel if you got a credit
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] card can't you just go stra... buy and... just write a cheque out and go straight in? Say well, here's my credit card
[Julie:] So I've bought that and I've my
[Shelly:] Yeah you can but if you land on
[Phil:] See that's diploma and that's not.
[Gary:] The thing is this isn't a credit card is it? This is what's her name innit?
[Julie:] So I can
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] If I had five
[Shelly:] That's half of the
[Julie:] thousand pound I could
[Shelly:] Exactly!
[Julie:] go up now.
[Shelly:] But
[Phil:] No.
[Shelly:] if you land on that
[Phil:] This one's...
[Gary:] That one?
[Shelly:] and you've got five thousand pound credit
[Gary:] Mm.
[Shelly:] it's still the same.
[Phil:] Oh yeah! That one.
[Julie:] Yeah. That's my
[Shelly:] That's right.
[Julie:] membership
[Gary:] That's class or Black's Art Gallery
[Julie:] and that
[Gary:] innit?
[Julie:] that is
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Julie:] classed as
[Phil:] Mm.
[Julie:] a
[Phil:] I thought they had... to be both the sa, same.
[Gary:] .
[Julie:] No, you
[Gary:] How we are ta, doing for time?
[Julie:] No, just two of anything.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Gary:] He wants to bust the!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I wanna bust something else!
[Gary:] Do you see Madonna in the paper yesterday?
[Phil:] Five.
[Gary:] In the news?
[Shelly:] No.
[Gary:] Did you see Madonna in the paper yesterday, naked!
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Ugly looking bitch!
[Phil:] I'll buy it! I'll buy one of those!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] For fifty quid []!
[Shelly:] There are see! Phil's just landed on it, it's only cost him fifty quid!
[Gary:] That makes me sick!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I ain't got five thousand pound.
[Gary:] You see Madonna in the paper? Have we got yesterday's paper?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] In there?
[Phil:] There you go!
[Julie:] I shall
[Shelly:] ... on Saturday.
[Gary:] No, it's not on there.
[Shelly:] There's Friday's.
[Phil:] So I can go up
[Gary:] Look at the state of this Phil!
[Phil:] a after I've got the card.
[Gary:] She looks repulsive in this!
[Phil:] Got my card.
[Gary:] I think she looks... disgusting!
[Julie:] Have you got five thousand pound?
[Shelly:] fifty pound now, oh right!
[Phil:] No!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] She looks bloody disgusting
[Phil:] Were you going to tell me that?
[Gary:] don't she?
[Phil:] It's alright.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh my God!
[Julie:] Posing as a bun
[Phil:] on the front there.
[Julie:] bunny girl for
[Gary:] As a bunny girl for bloody
[Julie:] a... porn magazine!
[Gary:] porn magazine.
[Phil:] Come on! Your turn Ga!
[Gary:] Gone right down now! She was on my... favourite top ten list, but she's not now! Mind you, she was brilliant in bed!
[Phil:] Oh!
[Julie:] Dream on!
[Gary:] I don't need that do I?
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] Cos you don't need to keep buying
[Julie:] You just gotta keep going round
[Gary:] yeah, that's right!
[Julie:] collecting money.
[Gary:] Shit! Go on then!
[Shelly:] I! Er, one, two
[Julie:] Did he wake up then?
[Shelly:] three, four, five, six, ooh ooh!
[Julie:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Ooh shit! Six.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] What do you get then?
[Gary:] The shits!
[Julie:] Complete the course then.
[Phil:] What do you get when you pass there?
[Shelly:] A thousand pound.
[Julie:] A thousand pound.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Shelly:] So if I go round in
[Julie:] Oh!
[Shelly:] five times... then get divorced
[Gary:] Is that the thing you get?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] and I can go straight
[Phil:] What?
[Shelly:] back up when I've bought [] the two of them then.
[Julie:] Er, ten. One, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] Did you have any of them pickled onions or not?
[Julie:] six
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] seven, eight
[Gary:] What they like?
[Julie:] nine, ten.
[Phil:] They're alright. A bit strong.
[Julie:] Don't need five.
[Shelly:] Got ten.
[Julie:] I've just gotta get one now.
[Shelly:] They're certainly not as old as ours are they? We've had ours about two years!
[Phil:] Twelve.
[Julie:] Mr thought they were [LAUGHTER] nice though []!
[Phil:] Must be getting that way.
[Gary:] Mind you, she did them about four year ago! [LAUGHTER] Aha []!
[Phil:] Twelve.
[Shelly:] Er
[Julie:] Ten, ten times the roll of both dice. Two hundred quid Shel.
[Shelly:] Oh! haven't I?
[Julie:] Ooh! Hoo! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Four hundred and... twelve thousand two hundred! No!
[Phil:] Twelve thousand two hundred.
[Gary:] Twelve hundred.
[Julie:] Yeah, that's erm
[Gary:] Twelve hundred pounds.
[Phil:] That's it!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Mm.
[Gary:] It's not funny!
[Phil:] I failed to get there!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's that, six?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Gift from dad
[Phil:] Could of told you it was!
[Gary:] collect a hundred pound.
[Julie:] Oh I could do with one of them! Is my dad gonna give me a hundred pound?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Ooh I keep sa []
[Phil:] Go on Ga! What do you do with that hundred pounds is the trouble!
[Julie:] Mm mm!
[Shelly:] I got it!
[Gary:] And more.
[Shelly:] Welfare payments.
[Julie:] Mm!
[Shelly:] Fifty times ro, oh, roll of one dice!
[Gary:] Love! Good one!
[Julie:] Six.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] How ma []
[Phil:] Three
[Julie:] Hundred and fifty.
[Phil:] three fifties then.
[Julie:] Nine. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
[Gary:] Get out of there! Nine.
[Shelly:] Stop tapping dear!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Look at all these scum down in that lower class! Ha!
[Gary:] And you fucking lot in the middle class!
[Shelly:] Oh hold on, I've got to collect this thousand pounds and I'll
[Julie:] Oh right!
[Shelly:] have a go on the race track. Mm! What! What! You lot
[Gary:] Can you throw those dice here.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Snob!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Another five hundred there, what!
[Shelly:] Ya!
[Gary:] Everything okay ya! Ya! Okay ya!
[Shelly:] That's forty
[Gary:] Okay ya!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Erm... I'll go from ten actually!
[Gary:] Yes,!
[Shelly:] Oh fuck! I should of gone up there!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Two to go then.
[Shelly:] And I'll go up.
[Gary:] Woa!
[Julie:] Oh!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] ! Yeah, put it in the bank!
[Shelly:] Shit!
[Gary:] High class! Stuff it up your arse! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh excuse me, no I'm middle!
[Julie:] Middle.
[Gary:] Oh middle class, stuff i
[Shelly:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] Oh middle class, stuff it up your arse! That's English!
[Shelly:] seven. Oh there you are again! Football... winnings, twenty times roll of both dice.
[Gary:] Oh sure.
[Julie:] I'm gonna get bloody twelve or something like that! Oh shit! There are see, six! So what's that?
[Phil:] That's six
[Julie:] Six twenties are hundred and twenty.
[Gary:] Six twe er, hundred and twenty.
[Julie:] Oh better than nothing I suppose!
[Phil:] Eight.
[Gary:] Oh middle class, stick it up your arse!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
[Gary:] I'm in the higher class, well shove it up your arse! Leave that there. It's on the table.
[Phil:] Mm.
[Gary:] One, two, three, one, two, three! Oh shit!
[Julie:] Here are. Can I change that?
[Gary:] This is what I done last time, and I stayed behind and I just
[Shelly:] Don't matter.
[Gary:] sneaked up, and sneaked up, and sneaked up and won!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] And I woke up then!
[Julie:] with his mouth shut!
[Phil:] And yeah, wet dream then didn't you?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Come back for
[Gary:] And how would you know?
[Shelly:] Problem is
[Gary:] Was you there?
[Phil:] Yeah I was.
[Gary:] Oh!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] !
[Julie:] Here are. Have one of them.
[Gary:] Tape's still rolling!
[Julie:] Four.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Shall I in
[Gary:] [singing] And I'm still rolling along []!
[Shelly:] in five minutes []?
[Julie:] Four.
[Shelly:] Tape's still rolling! Ha!
[Julie:] Here are!
[Phil:] Come on down! The price is right, so they say!
[Julie:] It's bugger all!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Er er er!
[Phil:] Gary stop coming!
[Shelly:] Just cos your jealous cos you don't know how to!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Teach me! Teach me!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] So you'll probably them sent
[Gary:] Five.
[Shelly:] to you with an obscene note []!
[Gary:] One, two, three four... [LAUGHTER] Can I have my two hundred please?
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] Oh wow! Make it two hundred pound.
[Phil:] Well it's better than a kick in the teeth isn't it? In a... win five hundred pound
[Shelly:] Three.
[Phil:] on the race horses.
[Shelly:] One, two, three. Oh fucking hell! I got another hundred! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
[Gary:] No, I ju, did you see that? That was sneaky Phil, weren't it? It was sneaky!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] We were putting our money there, money!
[Phil:] Just
[Shelly:] So Ga
[Gary:] Your.
[Shelly:] I've only gotta go round here five times now and buy
[Gary:] Shit! You!
[Julie:] Two. That didn't get me very far did it?
[Gary:] No!
[Phil:] Your going right up to the top aren't you?
[Shelly:] Ha.
[Phil:] Your in the high class now aren't you?
[Shelly:] Ah ya! I'm a proper snob now! Mm! What! What!
[Phil:] You stick by one. Two hundred pound please?
[Shelly:] Oh! Gary! Your go my love!
[Gary:] Just cos the Ferrari the other night!
[Julie:] Seven. Now where are you?
[Gary:] Seven. I'm up here dear! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Can't do any frigging worse have I?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Your not. I got a long way to go to get to high class.
[Shelly:] . One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Gary:] I could buy my way out couldn't I?
[Shelly:] ten thousand pounds!
[Julie:] Oh yeah, real snobby oh, aye!
[Phil:] Jammy tike!
[Shelly:] Oh, better make space for my money, what!
[Julie:] Nine.
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah,wa watch her she's a, she's in charge of the fun
[Julie:] Er Who would listen to that
[Gary:] Yeah, okay.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] through a at the beginning of every single tape []!
[Gary:] It's good i
[Phil:] Yours.
[Gary:] Mine. Thank you. Did I get I suppose!
[Julie:] Yes you did!
[Gary:] Oh right!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Had that bloody ages ago []!
[Gary:] Stop it!
[Phil:] No, it's not it's that shit that...
[Gary:] No I ain't got one of them. Got one of them!
[Phil:] Fuck off!
[Gary:] Haven't we?
[Julie:] He paid out two quid for that as well!
[Gary:] Alright! Don't keep rubbing it in!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Don't worry about it! I'm not depressed! Yet!
[Shelly:] Two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four
[Gary:] Pass.
[Shelly:] five.
[Phil:] Pass. Better than prison!
[Gary:] Pass.
[Shelly:] Three, one, two, three, good night at bingo collect a hundred pound.
[Phil:] Gee!
[Gary:] Oh right!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Shame I don't go!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah, go on have this one here!
[Julie:] I can't remember the last time I can I?
[Shelly:] Yeah, I know.
[Phil:] Er
[Shelly:] Ooh but the thing is.
[Gary:] My go is it?
[Phil:] No mine.
[Gary:] You been?
[Shelly:] This is nice!
[Gary:] You been?
[Phil:] Spring, spring onion?
[Shelly:] It's difficult to say
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] he's just done here.
[Gary:] What's that, two?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Oh!
[Julie:] Phil have, have you been Phil?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] No. Four
[Gary:] Ain't he? Oh I'll go again!
[Shelly:] five hundred, thirty four.
[Julie:] I can't buy nothing cos I can't afford it yet. [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [belch]
[Phil:] Mm mm!
[Shelly:] Ten.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] ten. I got one of them.
[Gary:] So have I.
[Julie:] Don't want one.
[Shelly:] Yeah, but he's.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh aye!
[Phil:] Six.
[Julie:] Sex. [LAUGHTER] Ha []!
[Shelly:] Give some back it's
[Julie:] Cor! It's obviously not real is it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] More like a loan aye, Phil?
[Phil:] Six.
[Gary:] I've got, I've got buy this, another thing yet.
[Julie:] permission
[Phil:] Football pools winnings... twenty times
[Julie:] Aren't you?
[Phil:] both dice.
[Julie:] Well, he's gotta buy another
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] thing.
[Phil:] Six.
[Julie:] Well buy and olive one.
[Phil:] Twenty sixes.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Phil:] Six twenties would be five
[Gary:] A hundred and... one thousand two hundred and twenty.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Well!
[Phil:] God sounds too high!
[Julie:] One, two, three
[Phil:] Oh!
[Julie:] four, five, six, one, two, three, four, five.
[Shelly:] And times!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yeah might just a little banker!
[Phil:] So why
[Julie:] Well it's
[Phil:] haven't you bought anything yet?
[Julie:] my banking system is.
[Shelly:] Well I can't afford it! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's only three thousand!
[Shelly:] I wish I could! Five, six, eight.
[Julie:] Only!
[Phil:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Okay.
[Phil:] you bet your
[Shelly:] there are
[Phil:] ten thousands
[Julie:] I got that again.
[Shelly:] I'm gonna wait till I've got enough money.
[Julie:] Oh! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I'll be up there! I'll be going in a minute!
[Gary:] Take your turn again.
[Julie:] Seven. So seven twenties, hundred and forty.
[Gary:] I keep my money hidden me cos it's
[Julie:] Keep landing
[Gary:] safe.
[Julie:] on that don't I? I'm doing
[Phil:] Four
[Julie:] quite well!
[Phil:] three, four
[Julie:] Your go.
[Shelly:] Run out of tens.
[Phil:] So... I'll have a go on the race track.
[Gary:] Don't send me off. Don't send me off Phil!
[Phil:] Alright. Do I have to open them? I have to open don't I?
[Julie:] Well if I give you them back
[Shelly:] Yeah, that's five.
[Gary:] We can have a go at this as well can't we?
[Shelly:] No.
[Phil:] No you can't.
[Shelly:] It's only on the lottery where you can go on there.
[Julie:] Two, three, four... if I give you five... alright?
[Phil:] I'm pissed off!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I might as well go to
[Julie:] [cough]
[Phil:] nine... go for nine alright?
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Yeah! Three hundred pound!
[Gary:] Oh you do it! Cos I got the Camden Race Course.
[Phil:] No, that's your line of work.
[Shelly:] They can be so kind!
[Julie:] Shit! Hey!
[Phil:] Jammy shit!
[Julie:] Nine hundred.
[Phil:] Nine
[Shelly:] Nine
[Phil:] hundred quid.
[Shelly:] Plus that... van.
[Phil:] I'll keep mine.
[Gary:] No he
[Julie:] Yes.
[Gary:] keeps that. That'll just mean
[Julie:] So if you give us... two of
[Phil:] I do
[Julie:] them back.
[Phil:] Two of them.
[Julie:] No, one of them.
[Shelly:] No, ten times
[Gary:] One of them.
[Phil:] One of them.
[Gary:] Just one back.
[Phil:] That's ten in... ten into one. And I've got three hundred on so I get
[Julie:] Oh yeah!
[Phil:] three hundred pound!
[Julie:] Mm!
[Shelly:] You jammy bastard!
[Phil:] I know. Mm. Your go again.
[Gary:] You nearly took that off my fucking pile!
[Shelly:] You'll soon have the five thousand Phil!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Not as daft as you though!
[Shelly:] You've can't
[Gary:] You got
[Shelly:] bloody talk! Yeah, well I keep winning
[Gary:] you just took that off my pile!
[Shelly:] the er football pools and [LAUGHTER] the bingo []!
[Gary:] You just took that off my pile!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Unemployment insurance payments ten times roll of one dice.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Gary:] And as well?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] That's great! Six.
[Shelly:] So, that'll be forty... two.
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Mm mm []!
[Julie:] I'm watching you! You were getting a bit close to my bloody money then!
[Gary:] I'm not like that!
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] Don't run in the family!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Don't you [LAUGHTER] you! Your supposed to be sticking up for me love!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You know I'm not a bad loser! Fucking hell!
[Phil:] shout to get on the
[Gary:] You know I'm not a bad loser! So don't do it else I'll pull the table apart [LAUGHTER] like I la, tipped the table in the air []!
[Julie:] Oh very stroppy! I held
[Gary:] Oh get stuffed!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I thought I was tricked! Mm!
[Gary:] Well... on the top and your the one with five hundred, you scrooge!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I've only got three hundred.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] And you've gotta beat
[Julie:] Three hundred and we're only the lower card!
[Gary:] Yeah!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You call yourself a Scot!
[Julie:] Number eleven this time. Mm that's
[Gary:] Put it in the bank!
[Julie:] Ooh!
[Gary:] Just put it in the bank!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Two, two, two, two, four, five, four, five... [singing] money bye bye
[Shelly:] So that's a thousand pound you messed up down there!
[Gary:] money, bye bye []!
[Julie:] Eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Ooh! Stock exchange, two hundred pound. Now then, what happens here, can't remember?
[Shelly:] Person for.
[Julie:] Oh my God! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Use your, use your two hundred pound then you've saved up.
[Julie:] Yeah. Go on then Phil.
[Phil:] What shall I go for? Anything?
[Julie:] Yep.
[Phil:] I know the
[Julie:] That'll do!
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Eleven.
[Shelly:] Eleven. Plus five times.
[Julie:] Yeah, we'll stick with that. So
[Shelly:] Do you get that back plus... a thousand.
[Phil:] Interest free.
[Shelly:] Ooh! Thanks very much Phil!
[Julie:] Aren't you ready to go up yet? Join me and.
[Shelly:] Can't I don't think, I ain't got five thousand.
[Gary:] But I have!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I have, but I'm not going up.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] I'll have some more of this delicious
[Phil:] seven.
[Gary:] cope!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Roll one dice and it's ten pounds
[Gary:] Bacardi and coke
[Shelly:] Oh well
[Gary:] really!
[Shelly:] liquid, you have owe her thirty five pound.
[Julie:] Here are, do you wanna change that first. Right.
[Phil:] selling that.
[Gary:] Thirty.
[Shelly:] No I've only got three and half thousand... at the moment.
[Gary:] More than me then!
[Julie:] I've got twenty... to, about twenty three thousand.
[Phil:] We'll be going prisoner in a minute!
[Shelly:] Well a bit more
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Well not yet []!
[Shelly:] than that, I might have got... nearly four thousand... haven't quite got enough
[Phil:] You got erm
[Shelly:] yet.
[Phil:] You'll be going to prison in a minute!
[Shelly:] I'll be getting divorced! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Is that okay?
[Gary:] I got three and a half thousand.
[Phil:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] You stay.
[Phil:] Ain't I Melanie?
[Shelly:] Who's go?
[Phil:] Your go Ga!
[Julie:] Gary's go.
[Gary:] Oh!
[Shelly:] Shit! If I get
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] that's a thousand times a roll times a roll one ooh ooh ooh!
[Gary:] If we if we get to alimony, I've seen the film!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Four. You're out!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four. Bloody hell! Oh that's all it was!
[Gary:] That's er, give that to me I'm not a bloody
[Julie:] But you can sell your things off.
[Gary:] Oh yes! I got a... two lovely there. Who wants. I only want
[Phil:] I'll buy you out on that Ga.
[Gary:] green furniture.
[Phil:] Yeah, yeah I'll buy that?
[Julie:] Who wants, who wants another coffee?
[Gary:] Go on, do something quick!
[Phil:] No.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I'll pay you fifteen quid.
[Julie:] You only get twenty back
[Gary:] Go on then fifteen.
[Julie:] if you sell it to.
[Gary:] Do you want this, The Ploughman?
[Julie:] No I've got that one.
[Phil:] No, just have twenty in the bank.
[Shelly:] You don't get anything back for them do
[Julie:] No.
[Shelly:] you? In the bank.
[Gary:] Oh screw you!
[Julie:] So you can get twenty back for your other one.
[Gary:] I got fifteen.
[Julie:] No! For your other one!
[Gary:] Oh yeah! Oh yeah, I'll have... don't they have one as well?
[Phil:] No,
[Julie:] No, so stop it!
[Gary:] Give us another twenty, fifty
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] A twenty, ha []!
[Gary:] Do I get my money as well for passing?
[Julie:] You got your money for passing!
[Gary:] You did not just give me my money for passing!
[Julie:] You got it from there! Cos your own insurance!
[Shelly:] Yeah! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Alright!
[Julie:] I've just been, I got to there.
[Gary:] Oh yeah, so have I.
[Julie:] You were on
[Phil:] Shit!
[Shelly:] Ha.
[Julie:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, six oh shitting hell!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I keep landing
[Gary:] Five.
[Julie:] on that!
[Gary:] Patience is a virtue darling, you'll soon go up!
[Phil:] Eight.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Make them as bad as a!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Five.
[Gary:] [belch]
[Phil:] I'm up.
[Gary:] No you're not!
[Julie:] No you're not!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] How did you work that out?
[Julie:] You're on insurance, one, two, three, four, five.
[Phil:] Gary had it... that's four and he went up and he was one place
[Shelly:] Yeah!
[Phil:] in front of me.
[Julie:] No, you were both on that.
[Gary:] You got five?
[Julie:] Yeah Gary had, yeah Gary had
[Shelly:] landed on that.
[Julie:] four, one, two, three, four... you've got five.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah but I was, I was on the same place as... I was one behind him!
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] No you weren't
[Julie:] You were on that one.
[Gary:] you on the stock exchange!
[Julie:] I was on the stock exchange.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] But? You're doing it again, you're trying to cheat!
[Phil:] No! No!
[Gary:] Ce certainly weren't me!
[Phil:] I was trying to
[Gary:] You go there.
[Phil:] work out what I needed to go up see.
[Julie:] Get divorced.
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, one, two, three!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Julie:] Can't buy till you've been round once!
[Gary:] I know! Screw you and all!
[Phil:] She's gonna get
[Shelly:] One, two
[Gary:] I'm not a bad loser Phil
[Shelly:] three, four, five
[Gary:] but, you know!
[Shelly:] Oh I think I'll buy one now.
[Gary:] If you know the table's going up in the air you know it's time to
[Shelly:] , oh that's mine I can't buy my own!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's alright we've got plenty of time!
[Julie:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, ooh!
[Gary:] Who's got the control to the, to the telly?
[Julie:] but I'm gonna miss a go.
[Gary:] Who's got the controls to the telly.
[Julie:] I have, down there.
[Gary:] Oh Jason's on, Jason!
[Phil:] I might set the tape.
[Gary:] I see erm... Philip Schofield's finished the old er
[Shelly:] And it's erm
[Gary:] Joseph and the er
[Shelly:] That tape's got One Foot in the Grave on it?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah. Richard Wilson.
[Shelly:] That's on Sunday night innit?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] Nine.
[Shelly:] bloody brilliant! Did you see last week?
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] nine. What's that? Yacht club.
[Shelly:] That's your membership.
[Julie:] You haven't been
[Gary:] Yeah, yeah.
[Julie:] round yet.
[Gary:] How many?
[Shelly:] It only wants a measly thousand pounds, alright?
[Julie:] Oh no, you ca you gotta go round first Ga.
[Gary:] I've gotta go round the start haven't I? Yes. A measly? It's good enough for me!
[Shelly:] You were gonna buy that weren't you?
[Gary:] Snob!
[Shelly:] Two, three, four, five, six, one, two, three, four, five! Hold on! Where was I? One, two, three, four, five, six, one, two, three, four, five, oh for... [LAUGHTER].
[Julie:] Have I gotta miss a go?
[Shelly:] Oh I gotta collect ten
[Phil:] Watch her Ju, she cheats!
[Shelly:] thousand.
[Julie:] Oh I'm my own bloody square again
[Phil:] Eight!
[Julie:] so I can't buy it!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Oh I'll have another go.
[Gary:] Yeah, down.
[Julie:] Rich uncle leaves you
[Shelly:] Ooh! Ooh!
[Julie:] five hundred. You want.
[Gary:] Well leave that for a minute then.
[Shelly:] Just down one. One, two, three, four. How you doing down there?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh God []!
[Shelly:] What is it?
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. So you can guarantee if I get divorced from there down to there I'll land on fucking and end up back here!
[Phil:] Lovely innit!
[Julie:] Then I got pots and pots of money!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] !
[Julie:] Loads of money!
[Gary:] ... what's that say?
[Phil:] It's just a thing that
[Shelly:] So haven't you two got five thousand pounds yet?
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] What's that, a three?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Gary:] One, two, three. Enter oh Christ! What does that do?
[Phil:] You can start buying now.
[Gary:] Yes.
[Shelly:] Three. One, two, three. Ooh, well I'll buy one of those! Ooh! One can only get three thousand pounds. Mm mm! Well for the time being
[Julie:] I don't wanna go up!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... One, two, two hundred and fifty
[Julie:] You're in the middle aren't you? So there are!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five
[Julie:] A designer jogging suit!
[Shelly:] Ooh! Is that it? Hey! Put it them in the top!
[Julie:] Oh no, the top! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Aha! What do you think I'm
[Julie:] Oh sorry!
[Shelly:] paying for
[Julie:] Mink coat
[Shelly:] I was gonna say, cor!
[Julie:] Mink coat for Pamela.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... No, it should be artificial shouldn't it?
[Gary:] Get her some coronations!
[Shelly:] Why, who calls them coronations?
[Gary:] She does.
[Julie:] Your mum was saying don't
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] she? You know those flowers that you bought Pam?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] And they were carnations weren't they?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] She went into work and told everybody they were coronation! She said it wrong!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Coronation Street []!
[Julie:] Ten. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Shelly:] You can go up now can't you?
[Julie:] I'll go up next go. Well no, I've gotta have your next got haven't I? And then go up.
[Shelly:] No, you can sit up there now.
[Phil:] You don't, you gotta, you gotta past there and say... go past there... and say you're going up the next time
[Julie:] Yeah alright.
[Phil:] in the middle class.
[Shelly:] Oh, making up new rules as he goes along here!
[Phil:] That's right innit!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Got to stop and then you say you're going up to middle class.
[Gary:] One, two, three, four
[Shelly:] Flipping talking, when they listen to that they'll burst their bloody ear drums!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] It's a good job it's not a video though innit?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] My God!
[Gary:] See all the cheating going on wouldn't they?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Five.
[Gary:] Stock exchange.
[Shelly:] I know, you going to have a go on that Phil?
[Phil:] Yes, I'll have a bit of a do on that.
[Shelly:] Or is it going to be a measly five hundred, what?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ooh!! Mm! Oh I've done it haven't I?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Number two here we go!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I dunno,
[Julie:] Oh that's lovely!
[Gary:] that'll do me! five times.
[Shelly:] Five thousand pound.
[Julie:] That means you can go up.
[Phil:] And chuck one on the floor.
[Shelly:] That's what
[Gary:] I didn't want that one did I?
[Julie:] No.
[Phil:] Put one back now.
[Gary:] You give me two. I'm honest, see!
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] You can go up then after you've been
[Gary:] Yeah, you thought I'd be a cheat didn't you? he said that
[Julie:] Got a five
[Phil:] Yeah alright.
[Shelly:] Oh he's got a ten thousand anyway ain't he?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Yeah. He was holding his hand out hoping that he would er... get a bit... and well I said if you give me
[Shelly:] After they've
[Gary:] three
[Shelly:] gone out! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I'll buy one of tho, oh no I won't!
[Gary:] Yeah, if you want it.
[Julie:] Oh go on! Oh! Oh, oh no I haven't got much change at the moment Ga.
[Gary:] How much do I need to go up?
[Julie:] I've only got ten thousand!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] How much do I need to go up?
[Phil:] Ten thousand.
[Gary:] I can go up.
[Julie:] Erm
[Phil:] Yeah, but you're gotta get... of these.
[Julie:] You have to have two of your properties
[Gary:] That's right! I don't wanna go up anyway.
[Julie:] two of your
[Gary:] I wanna stay, I'm happy where I am!
[Julie:] properties plus your membership.
[Gary:] I got my Yacht club thing have I?
[Julie:] Yeah, cos I've got that I think.
[Shelly:] three thousand, there you go darling!
[Gary:] Where di, yeah but you didn't give me it!
[Phil:] Oh you can have er
[Gary:] Did you?
[Julie:] What?
[Gary:] My yacht club.
[Julie:] No, you landed on it but you haven't been round once. Oh that's right, yeah you have just now!
[Gary:] Mm.
[Phil:] bought a car for Dianne!
[Julie:] Oh!
[Shelly:] Oh yes!!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Porsche with the engine in and that!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh we got Porsche! Have you? No, I've got a stil, I've got an e, I've got an engine in the back of my car, oh it's a Porsche!
[Shelly:] A turbo
[Gary:] Oh yes!
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six. I'll be
[Shelly:] Right! You going up now?
[Phil:] Shall I go there somewhere
[Gary:] No! You gotta wait
[Shelly:] Oh no you've passed that one now haven't you?
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Shelly:] Then when you get back you pay, you gotta pass it.
[Gary:] So when you got pass there Ju don't forget you say I am going up to middle class!
[Shelly:] You'll be ready to join Gary will you? What! What! What!
[Julie:] What do I do when I get
[Phil:] Five. That's a. Oh that's mine anyway.
[Gary:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, one, two. I can buy now anyway can't I?
[Julie:] A jogging outfit there!
[Gary:] Yes, I shall have one of them. How much?
[Shelly:] I thought you be rich in a minute!
[Julie:] Five. [LAUGHTER] No chance []! I doubt it!
[Shelly:] See, right if he still wasn't speaking to me properly I wouldn't have brought that off him! I
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I would have waited and bought one off Gary... and then he wouldn't have been able to go up would he?
[Gary:] That's not very nice that!
[Julie:] No, that's right!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No, that's spiteful! I do that later... don't I darling? [LAUGHTER] In real life I do []! In real life I normally do. No, I've just had a go.
[Julie:] She's had a go.
[Gary:] You happy?
[Shelly:] I'll go again
[Phil:] No offence!
[Shelly:] last night. One, two, three, four, five, one, two. Right, I've already got one of those haven't I?
[Julie:] Yeah. [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah!
[Shelly:] It's er... it's an artificial
[Julie:] Five. one, two, three, four, five, oh shit!
[Shelly:] an artificial mink coat for.
[Gary:] Taxes.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[Gary:] Good job you stayed on there Ju!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Bloody hell!
[Gary:] Gonna have to stay there another, a longer darling!
[Shelly:] Oh bloody hell!
[Gary:] Twelve... twelve
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Want to ask me what they want Ju?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] See, I knew she was gonna say that []! Oh bugger!
[Gary:] Oh you're gonna set my cousin off there!
[Julie:] I'll take a hundred and fifty now!
[Phil:] Seven.
[Shelly:] [cough]
[Julie:] Cor! I always land on that bloody thing!
[Phil:] Credit due.
[Julie:] Pay ten percent interest.
[Gary:] Pay ten percent interest.
[Julie:] No you haven't got any credit have you?
[Phil:] No.
[Gary:] No. Alright then! Six. One, two, three, four, five
[Phil:] How do you pay for printing then?
[Gary:] six. Yacht club please?
[Shelly:] Only if you're up here!
[Gary:] And my thousand please?
[Shelly:] So you only want... eight hundred.
[Gary:] Why?
[Julie:] Yeah, cos it's two hundred
[Gary:] Sorry, is it? Oh yeah!
[Shelly:] One, two, three
[Phil:] Is it all worth it just go on that?
[Shelly:] then someone's hogging all these one hundred pounds!
[Phil:] I've got some.
[Gary:] I've got some if you want some. I got about... fifty of them if you want them.
[Julie:] Now, two three, one, two, shit!
[Gary:] Five.
[Julie:] Well I'll cut my ten
[Shelly:] There are.
[Julie:] thousand, I've got a roll
[Shelly:] There's five from Phil and five from me.
[Phil:] I'll hold on to mine. Is that the Yacht club? Better check mine.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yep!
[Gary:] Did I have mine on there? Yeah, I did didn't I?
[Phil:] How many times you been round Shel?
[Shelly:] Dunno. Why?
[Phil:] Only about three innit?
[Julie:] Who's go is it?
[Gary:] Why is she cheating is she?
[Julie:] Have you done, have you yours Shel?
[Shelly:] I've had my go.
[Gary:] She cheating or something?
[Shelly:] She's on taxes.
[Julie:] Go next.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] She was trying to get out of that []!
[Shelly:] What is it?
[Julie:] Pay a thousand pound.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Shelly:] Roll the one dice?
[Julie:] Both dice.
[Shelly:] Ha! Ooh! One go?
[Gary:] Yes!
[Shelly:] I got double six!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Five thousand!
[Phil:] Five thousand charlies!
[Shelly:] Oh well wow!
[Phil:] It's only a measly
[Shelly:] Bless you!
[Phil:] round the go once innit?
[Julie:] This is the money.
[Phil:] It's only once round the track isn't it? Isn't it?
[Shelly:] Six. One, two
[Julie:] Oh!
[Shelly:] three
[Phil:] Isn't it?
[Shelly:] four
[Phil:] Isn't it?
[Julie:] Ooh I've only gotta get my
[Shelly:] I need that!
[Julie:] diploma now haven't I?
[Gary:] Yeah but you, you wa you want the er... how much do you need fifty
[Julie:] Oh shit! I need fifty don't I?
[Gary:] You haven't got it you got ten, twenty
[Phil:] One, two
[Gary:] you got about twenty five if you're lucky!
[Phil:] I've gotta get er
[Gary:] I'm not gonna give it you now!
[Phil:] I've got er
[Shelly:] Fifty seven, seven, twenty eight
[Phil:] Er... go up next go.
[Gary:] [belch]
[Phil:] Four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Gary:] Now you say it!
[Phil:] ten, eleven
[Julie:] He has done.
[Phil:] eleven.
[Julie:] Well you... put yourself there now don't you?
[Gary:] No!
[Julie:] Yeah, and then his next go starts on that.
[Shelly:] Yeah!
[Phil:] So... I've just
[Gary:] You mean, you mean
[Phil:] I just
[Gary:] again?
[Julie:] No!
[Phil:] should go up there.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] innit? You prat []!
[Julie:] You'll be, you'd be going
[Phil:] The
[Julie:] all bloody night wouldn't you!
[Phil:] That's my erm things start from counting from there.
[Shelly:] Yeah!
[Julie:] Yes!
[Phil:] Two, three
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] Yeah, cos he had eleven.
[Phil:] five, six... seven
[Julie:] Oh no, no, no!
[Phil:] eight
[Gary:] No! No! No, no, no, no, no you cheat!
[Phil:] eleven. I would have landed on stock exchange.
[Gary:] No! Cos you gotta stay down
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] there. No, that's it.
[Julie:] Yeah. As soon as you
[Gary:] When you get to there.
[Phil:] Does that mean I've gotta stay on these?
[Gary:] When you get to there... yeah, or
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] whatever! I'll be them.
[Shelly:] But we don't need them!
[Phil:] Just going back to the bank for twenty
[Gary:] So
[Phil:] pound a time. Twenty
[Shelly:] Whoever you bought them
[Phil:] pound a time.
[Shelly:] off of.
[Phil:] Don't wanna keep the
[Gary:] No! No, no, no!
[Shelly:] No, cos it's two hundred in that one and
[Gary:] You gotta start afresh to go above there and you want five thousand as well don't you?
[Shelly:] Aye, hold on!
[Phil:] Do I have to pay five thousand?
[Julie:] No! You only need five thousand.
[Shelly:] I don't need a thing! I don't need a membership for that!
[Julie:] No, cos there isn't one!
[Shelly:] Oh wow! [LAUGHTER] Ha []! Right, so I owe you twenty pound... I haven't got any tens, you'll have to change that.
[Phil:] Banks.
[Shelly:] No, that's mine!
[Julie:] Mm mm.
[Phil:] Oh you have to
[Shelly:] And the bank owes you twenty pound, forty pound.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four
[Shelly:] You owe me thirty pounds.
[Julie:] Mm. Right!
[Shelly:] Thank you. Oh I like this game!
[Gary:] Sorry!
[Shelly:] I've only got to go round another three times! Not bad on that!
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
[Shelly:] Thank you. Five hundred
[Julie:] Again!
[Shelly:] pound.
[Phil:] Ha!
[Gary:] Just put it with the... you know, about eighty thousands I've got!
[Shelly:] Ooh! Not bad for!
[Gary:] I don't
[Julie:] Eight.
[Gary:] want any there st, looks like a
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven and oh wow!
[Gary:] Oh, here we go again! Can we go to the bank. Go for a hundred pound.
[Julie:] Oh it's me innit?
[Shelly:] Er
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] We, it's that all the... Christ!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] That's why I said your going for a thousand []!
[Phil:] Yeah!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Look at all that!
[Shelly:] No!
[Gary:] Take a chance on it!
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Shelly:] Eight.
[Gary:] Eight.
[Julie:] Your best move plus one half
[Shelly:] One half.
[Phil:] Ooh! Go for it again and see how much
[Gary:] Yeah, go for
[Julie:] No, go on!
[Gary:] hundred!
[Shelly:] Oh my God! Do you trust me?
[Julie:] No! [LAUGHTER]... Ooh no!
[Phil:] Seven that time.
[Julie:] Go again!
[Phil:] Seven. Go on then! I might do another one! Eight again!
[Shelly:] Eight! Ah, that's back, take that and then five
[Phil:] Investment first one hour.
[Shelly:] hundred.
[Gary:] Watch her Ju! Watch her!
[Shelly:] Oh where shall I put my five hundred? Got a lot of, lot of room have I?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Just stick it in that hole there!
[Shelly:] Ooh, get lost! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Three.
[Shelly:] Ooh look at that!
[Julie:] One, two, three. Right, I'm up!
[Gary:] There you go. See you in a minute! See you in a mo! Soon I'll be rushing
[Julie:] Oh!
[Gary:] to
[Julie:] I'm getting
[Phil:] That's twelve
[Julie:] then.
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Phil:] eleven, or whatever I had. So you're
[Gary:] Sell it back to whoever.
[Phil:] really. Bank.
[Shelly:] One's mine.
[Julie:] Yep.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] You sod []!
[Phil:] So it didn't matter what I got as long as you got a
[Gary:] You, you want your
[Phil:] a.
[Shelly:] That's twenty pound innit?
[Gary:] One two, three, four
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Phil:] five, six, seven
[Julie:] You don't get anything for eleven.
[Shelly:] Aye, I gave him twenty pound for that
[Phil:] Aye, Olive's Jewellery.
[Shelly:] fucking membership!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Shall I buy Olive's Jewellery?
[Shelly:] , that's good!
[Gary:] No you can't cos you can't buy till your
[Julie:] Okay.
[Gary:] first round can he?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] What's that for? Can't buy till you've been round once?
[Shelly:] I paid you twenty quid for your bloody membership! Kept back for that!
[Julie:] Oh! Oh!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Don't tell me that!
[Gary:] What's that, seven? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I'll buy the Northend Bar did we?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You need two of them didn't you?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Gary:] And one of them?
[Julie:] Yep! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Er er er! Another ten thousand, what, what, what! Nearly there! Nearly there, nearly there chaps!
[Shelly:] What?
[Gary:] Twenty thousand we said didn't
[Julie:] Four.
[Gary:] we?
[Shelly:] No, [LAUGHTER] fifteen []!
[Julie:] One, two, three, four.
[Shelly:] I can't buy anything cos I gotta round once.
[Phil:] She's gotta go down! She's gotta go down! Gotta get
[Julie:] This is the first time I've stayed up this long!
[Phil:] A six.
[Julie:] And it's a good job it's a woman saying that cos they'll wonder what the hell we're on about! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Five, six.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Up!
[Gary:] No! No, you can't!
[Shelly:] Yeah what did you do that for?
[Gary:] You gotta go round once and you ain't gone round!
[Phil:] I still collect money!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] six.
[Gary:] Six thousand. Bad loser I'm no not! Okay? [LAUGHTER]... One, two, three, four, [singing] fi i i i i ive []! I'll have that one.
[Julie:] That's Phil's.
[Gary:] Do I need that one?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Car Sale. I'll have one of them Phil.
[Phil:] So that's just a five hundred one innit?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I'm in the cars. Well that's... that's er... and I look down on no one actually.
[Gary:] Ching
[Phil:] But I look. Because she is... hire class! It's called a CV two.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Yes []!
[Phil:] And check her round about... for Jane. [singing] Thank heaven... for little Jane []!
[Shelly:] Oh thank God for that!... Seven.
[Phil:] [singing] Cos little Jane couldn't get as clo [], if I sing they might
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five six
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] say []
[Shelly:] I can't buy anything cos I'm on my first time round.
[Julie:] Any chance of being recording, come
[Phil:] I'm off!
[Julie:] for you!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four
[Gary:] Yacht club!
[Phil:] Can't buy it though!
[Gary:] No you can't.
[Phil:] It's only first
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Mm []!
[Phil:] time round.
[Gary:] Eight. One, two, three
[Shelly:] A recording contract's not a company.
[Gary:] Stock exchange and higher than mine, ha ha ha ha ha ha!
[Phil:] . And you're frozen!
[Gary:] Yes.
[Shelly:] Sells.
[Phil:] Sells.
[Shelly:] Oh oh oh!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] They want a low one look at them!
[Julie:] Ooh bloody hell!
[Shelly:] How much is he putting on it? Three thousand? Get a two.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Ooh!... Eight thousand! He trusts you!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] May as well give it straight to the bank. Oh what have
[Gary:] That'll do me!
[Shelly:] you done!
[Gary:] investment plus five times!
[Shelly:] Eight thousand. Five eight, forty thousand!
[Phil:] [singing] Thank heavens... for
[Shelly:] Have you got that much?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] cos I'm nearly there []! It was on there Shel aren't I?
[Shelly:] Are you sure that's right?
[Phil:] I must be there Shel.
[Julie:] Yeah, you got eleven didn't you?
[Gary:] Yes, that's right.
[Julie:] So investment plus
[Shelly:] Oh hang on! Sorry!
[Julie:] is plus five times. He put in eight thousand... so five
[Phil:] Ah yes.
[Julie:] eight thousands... five eights are forty, forty thousand.
[Phil:] I'm not far off am I?
[Shelly:] That's more than I've got!
[Phil:] I should come down aren't I?
[Gary:] Yeah, you must have forty.
[Julie:] Yeah, cos you've only got, that's
[Gary:] But i
[Julie:] five thousand
[Gary:] i is there four? Yeah,yo don't put
[Phil:] Are they?
[Shelly:] Are you sure?
[Gary:] forty eight thousand.
[Julie:] Mm mm!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] You could go up to top group... ri straight
[Phil:] Well yes
[Gary:] away.
[Phil:] but do I want to? That's the thing, do I want to? I'm there aren't I?
[Julie:] Well with th... yeah, cos put in it
[Gary:] Have they changed your two hundred pounds in there?
[Shelly:] You put in eight thousand. Yeah, I was gonna say hundreds!
[Gary:] So change six hundred thousand.
[Shelly:] No we've put in eight thousand.
[Phil:] Eight thousand.
[Shelly:] So five eights
[Phil:] I do I don't mess
[Shelly:] are forty.
[Phil:] when it comes to the big stuff, go for it! Don't I darling?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Gary! Your go.
[Gary:] He's always got no fucking money!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What are we doing? Are we going to a hundred thousand then or what?
[Julie:] My God! I've only got three!
[Phil:] Could we go to hundred thousand or not?
[Gary:] Dunno. It's only a thousand pound.
[Shelly:] Yeah, cos if you're going for fifty
[Phil:] We'll go
[Shelly:] if you're going
[Phil:] we'll go to a thousand
[Gary:] If you go to a thousand she'll only have to come and do it now cos... well... I've won ain't I?
[Julie:] Well you've still gotta get your
[Gary:] I don't need to do I?
[Julie:] your things.
[Shelly:] He's got them!
[Phil:] He can go up! He can go
[Gary:] I I
[Phil:] up now.
[Gary:] alright, but I don't want to.
[Shelly:] Yeah but you have to put onto them...
[Julie:] No, you haven't got them for your
[Gary:] No, what the hell! I'll stay, I'll just, I'll just
[Julie:] Yeah because you could end up
[Phil:] What we going up to?
[Julie:] being divorced.
[Phil:] What we going up to now then?
[Shelly:] Whatever! Fifty or ten, whatever! Hundred and fifty, or hundred and ten, yeah. [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] That's terrible!
[Julie:] Hundred thousand
[Phil:] Hundred thousand, right
[Julie:] cos that's only ten times
[Gary:] We did with Martin and Kim didn't we? Cos they had this argument before, Kim said five, five hundred... fifty o... fifty thousand and Kim said no we'll make it hundred thousand cos Tell you about that
[Julie:] Have you been Shel?
[Shelly:] Yes.
[Gary:] With a throw of a dice you can go right up couldn't you?
[Julie:] You've been up again?
[Gary:] Here we are, spinning!
[Phil:] How much is it to go up anyway?
[Gary:] Six
[Julie:] Five.
[Gary:] seven thousand.
[Julie:] nine. Ten thousand actually.
[Phil:] Can't afford it like that.
[Shelly:] Yeah, you just got a fucking forty thousand you bastard!
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
[Gary:] Have over ten thousand.
[Julie:] I'll have a thousand, er Shel?
[Gary:] Five hundred! Er!
[Shelly:] I still can't buy cos it's only my first time bloody round!
[Phil:] Go for it! You don't, you just go straight for it!
[Julie:] So's Phil innit? We can't buy at the moment.
[Phil:] Did you give me money did you?
[Shelly:] Yeah!
[Phil:] Oh! So I've kept my money.
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] So
[Gary:] Yes.
[Julie:] Oh yes.
[Phil:] Too late to give me a loan?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... What do you need a loan for? You've got more money than what I have!... I think I'll try that next time I'll save it for myself!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] You didn't say that, you're going up this time if you wanted that.
[Gary:] I could do couldn't I? I've gotta get to there though first.
[Phil:] Aha.
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Gary:] Mm. Oh. What's that?
[Julie:] Six.
[Gary:] Six. One, two, three, four, five, six. I'm going anyway.
[Phil:] That's the size of the bloody
[Shelly:] Bloody hell!
[Julie:] It's a good job it's not five thousand innit? Er, I mean fifty.
[Gary:] [singing] Gree dee da da da da da da []! I've gotta sell these off now.
[Julie:] Let's hope you get er, one, two
[Gary:] And open the middle class
[Julie:] three, four. Let's hope you get
[Phil:] And both of you get past
[Julie:] to five.
[Phil:] Ten you can rent ones.
[Julie:] Yeah you can buy off Ga.
[Gary:] Yes, you can you can buy off
[Shelly:] Mm.
[Gary:] me.
[Shelly:] Me and Phil then?
[Gary:] Yes. I've got two... I've got ee, erm clo Yacht Club card for sale.
[Phil:] What do they get back on them? They only get hundred pound do they?
[Gary:] I'll give them hundred for them.
[Shelly:] Yeah, but you don't get anything for his Yacht Club. So he paid two hundred quid for it. [whispering] Damn good []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Give him hundred
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]... Hundred and thirty!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh my, you total sod []!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Can't you make it a rounded fi, hundred and fifty!
[Phil:] Hundred and fifty then!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah. That's what I was gonna say! Well I've gotta have it haven't I?
[Gary:] Who's gonna have the other fifty.
[Shelly:] So have I!
[Gary:] oi! Who's gonna
[Shelly:] Hundred and fifty.
[Phil:] I'll give him the two.
[Shelly:] What, the two hundred?
[Phil:] Cos you got haven't you?
[Shelly:] Two fifty. I'm not going any
[Phil:] Okay.
[Shelly:] higher!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] She takes it!
[Phil:] Well if I'd have known that before else I'll go and land on the.
[Shelly:] Yeah, you bloody wait! I'll go and land on it now and I'll be bloody pig sick!
[Phil:] I'll give you
[Shelly:] Thirty, forty
[Phil:] I'll gi yer
[Shelly:] fifty
[Phil:] I don't want hundred quid notes I ju, oh well...
[Shelly:] I ain't got any fifty pound notes so!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Well, []!
[Shelly:] No I won't!
[Gary:] Want these? Anybody want these?
[Phil:] I'll I'll give you hundred quid for each one.
[Gary:] Oh well! It's your money!
[Phil:] Aye, aye, aye yeah! I'll do the here!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I'll take that off you because
[Gary:] Right.
[Julie:] he's decided to sell it to Phil now!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] And I... and these there, I got two of these for sale?
[Shelly:] And I used your five hundred.
[Julie:] When it's, you paid five hundred each.
[Gary:] I paid five hundred for them.
[Shelly:] But he can only get a hundred pound back if he's get it from the bank.
[Julie:] Hundred and fifty... for one.
[Phil:] Each.
[Gary:] For one?
[Julie:] Mm.
[Phil:] Yeah, for one. Correct. I'll give you hundred for that other one.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] That's all you get fro from the bank.
[Gary:] No.
[Phil:] I could buy it straight
[Gary:] More!
[Phil:] away.
[Gary:] How
[Julie:] No.
[Gary:] much do I get from the bank?
[Shelly:] Hundred.
[Julie:] Hundred each.
[Gary:] I'm gonna be a bastard! Give me two hundred for them both.
[Shelly:] That's right! Cos you're more likely to land on
[Julie:] Oh hold on!
[Phil:] I can't
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I ca I can.
[Julie:] No you can't!
[Shelly:] Yes!
[Julie:] You've gotta give him hundred for yours and you've gotta give him hundred for yours!
[Shelly:] Yeah, cos it's not innit?
[Gary:] Oh shit! Course you have, yeah!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Never mind I'll, don't matter does it? What?
[Julie:] You've gotta give him hundred quid.
[Gary:] You've gotta give me a hundred.
[Phil:] Yeah!
[Julie:] And I've gotta give
[Phil:] one of them now.
[Julie:] Gary hundred.
[Phil:] Alright.
[Gary:] Ah shit!
[Shelly:] Bloody hell!
[Phil:] My eyesight that bad now is it?
[Julie:] your thing.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four
[Phil:] Have I been? Don't I get a go then?
[Julie:] Yeah, you've been!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve.
[Gary:] Oh yes, I'm up with Shel aren't I? Up in the higher class.
[Shelly:] Yes!
[Julie:] Blimey we ain't even gone round once yet Phil! I can't buy anything
[Gary:] Enter the higher class!
[Julie:] yet! Until we get to bloody there!
[Gary:] Do you want some more of this lovely Coke!
[Julie:] Oh God! A ten.
[Shelly:] Haven't got a glass.
[Julie:] Oh look at that! Just missed the flipping
[Gary:] Stil missing some some there.
[Julie:] taxes!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] About time!
[Phil:] Still going now! I don't whether there was something there's another bottle of that.
[Julie:] Anybody got any more nuts?
[Gary:] Three
[Julie:] That was nice!
[Gary:] four, five, six.
[Phil:] Bought some coke?
[Julie:] No I'll go.
[Phil:] Alright, we've just got the green ones.
[Gary:] No not like that.
[Phil:] I was gonna say do you want... got any dosh? Get another bottle?
[Shelly:] Oh Phillip don't be such a swine!
[Phil:] Yeah, I I'll pay for it! I got loads of dosh, look! Here are Ju,gi you some money go down and buy you some
[Gary:] Go on!
[Phil:] Buy yourself a new fur coat and that!
[Julie:] Oh yeah! I don't want a fur coat!
[Phil:] Could you imagine it, going in? Go in
[Julie:] I've had that coat
[Phil:] Could you imagine it though going into so somewhere like Dotty's or whatever and saying well
[Julie:] Well, I bet I have
[Phil:] Help yourself darling just... just take one of these little notes and, ya!
[Shelly:] So you can buy a... twenty four carat gold necklace darling! What! What!
[Gary:] Ah! Not for you that's for certain!
[Julie:] No it'll probably
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] in the shed wouldn't it dear?
[Gary:] Yes. My go?
[Shelly:] Mhm.
[Gary:] What's that? Six.
[Shelly:] Bit below the belt that!
[Gary:] One, two, three, four
[Julie:] No Shel!
[Gary:] five, six... black, oh it's Guy!
[Julie:] You been round once?
[Shelly:] No you haven't.
[Julie:] You haven't been round once yet.
[Phil:] Put them back!
[Gary:] I'm just looking! Only looking!
[Shelly:] I ain't even got round!
[Julie:] My go!
[Gary:] How you doing Shel?
[Shelly:] Not very well!
[Gary:] Nor me?
[Shelly:] Two. Shit! One, two, three
[Gary:] You know.
[Shelly:] four, five, six, one, two, three
[Gary:] It's only a gamble! It does quite well sometimes.
[Shelly:] four, five. I'm divorced!
[Gary:] I've done that a few times with Ju ain't I?
[Shelly:] Are you divorced!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh you're not are you?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Oh what a shame! [LAUGHTER] Ha ha, oh what what []!
[Shelly:] Shit! A thousand poun, times roll of both dice!
[Gary:] Pay alimony a hundred times the roll of both dice, return to lower class!
[Julie:] Eight thousand!
[Gary:] Lower class! Return to lower class!
[Phil:] Yeah but where to though in
[Julie:] Shame innit?
[Phil:] lower class? Just there?
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Phil:] She goes back to there?
[Julie:] Mhm.
[Phil:] there. And she's gotta go round
[Shelly:] Eight thousand. Well he's only getting
[Phil:] She's gotta sell them all off.
[Shelly:] two thousand back!
[Julie:] Yeah, you gotta sell them all off now!
[Gary:] Yes! And I don't need any of that!
[Phil:] For how much?
[Julie:] Whatever
[Phil:] We gotta give them back to her?
[Gary:] I'll give you
[Phil:] We gotta give her
[Shelly:] No, Gary can buy them off me if you want. But I can get five hundred from the bank.
[Gary:] I'll give you
[Julie:] Or five hundred each of.
[Gary:] I'll gi you five, I'll give you five hundred from both.
[Phil:] You'll still be in debt Shel cos he's got forty
[Shelly:] Well shall I give him
[Gary:] [belch]
[Julie:] She can get five hundred each off me and Phil.
[Gary:] Oh can she?
[Julie:] Yeah, because they're our cards.
[Gary:] But I, I need them don't I?
[Julie:] Mm!
[Gary:] Go on then love!
[Phil:] No you've been round now you can start buying your own.
[Gary:] I could do couldn't I?
[Julie:] No he hasn't!
[Gary:] But I
[Phil:] But don't forget she paid
[Shelly:] two thousand.
[Phil:] She paid three thousand for them so
[Shelly:] For each one. Yeah, it's your big idea!
[Phil:] I'll give you two thousand
[Gary:] I'd be a bitch and sell them!
[Shelly:] Each?
[Gary:] No you cheeky sod!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Well why not? It's still saving you two thousand!
[Gary:] No I said two thousand.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Not each!
[Shelly:] Well I need the bloody money now! Thank you!
[Gary:] You will do, yeah, after this alimonies's over!
[Phil:] Now you gotta pay money haven't you?
[Julie:] Right so Shel's down. So
[Shelly:] I've paid my bloody you cheeky
[Phil:] Yeah but
[Shelly:] sod!
[Phil:] You haven't!
[Julie:] No!
[Phil:] You gotta throw your dice now, it's alimony.
[Julie:] No she's done that!
[Shelly:] I've just done that!
[Julie:] Eight thousand. Just changed the ten thousand.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Julie:] Yeah!
[Phil:] I didn't see that. I'm sneaky!
[Julie:] Twelve! Gosh I'll be able to
[Phil:] Well
[Julie:] buy something.
[Phil:] now I'm up here all on my own in the higher class!
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten
[Phil:] look down on you in the middle class!
[Julie:] eleven. Fucking hell! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] And you look up to me!
[Shelly:] You can guarantee I'll divorced straight away again now!
[Julie:] I'll have one of them Shel?
[Shelly:] To five hundred.
[Phil:] I'll count my winnings so
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... He'll probably win now he's got those cards
[Julie:] There you go!
[Shelly:] as well!
[Gary:] Yeah, he's gotta get... he's gotta get one of them
[Julie:] I only need one more!
[Gary:] as well.
[Julie:] And then I've got to have my lunch.
[Phil:] Give you the Yacht Club.
[Gary:] No, I'm gonna
[Julie:] Ten thousand.
[Shelly:] Ten thousand.
[Gary:] I... take a chance in a minute on Stock Exchange and wack my lot on!
[Julie:] I've only got to bloody si, I've only got about the same.
[Shelly:] Yeah and I'll throw a ten!
[Gary:] Eight.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[Phil:] Oh God!
[Shelly:] And then you'd need a credit card wouldn't you Gary?
[Phil:] Five, six, seven... eight
[Gary:] I would that!
[Phil:] Welfare payments.
[Julie:] Fifty times roll of one dice.
[Phil:] Fifty times roll of... one dice.
[Gary:] You gotta pay that on it Phil?
[Julie:] No! Oh yeah! Erm
[Phil:] Welfare payments
[Shelly:] Yeah, you gotta pay that.
[Phil:] ten times roll of one dice!
[Julie:] Fifty times.
[Shelly:] Fifty.
[Phil:] That's what I said, fifty times roll of one dice!
[Shelly:] Hundred and fifty. Oh well that's not much is it!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] It is when you []... if, you're money's running down Phil!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four. One, two. Can I have my
[Shelly:] Ten times.
[Phil:] my little... note badge to go underneath on the
[Julie:] Oh! What, just there?
[Phil:] Just slip it under there my doll! For me please.
[Julie:] There we go! Is that it?
[Phil:] Okay! Spiffing
[Julie:] One
[Phil:] what!
[Julie:] two, three, four, five, six, seven, here we come!
[Gary:] How many do I need, ten?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine....
[Phil:] Can't buy, you gotta go round twice. Or once.
[Julie:] Once
[Shelly:] Ten
[Julie:] thank you very much!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. I'll have one of them.
[Gary:] Ooh! That's one of mine!
[Shelly:] Oh shit! Don't! He'll be up in, he'll fucking win it now! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] That's er, this one five hundred isn't it? That's er
[Julie:] Solarium.
[Gary:] A solarium, yes.
[Julie:] Just fancied a solarium.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Never be able to afford one!
[Shelly:] Well you've just bought one!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] So all I need now is ten thousand pound!
[Phil:] So you've just handed five, you can't afford a bloody... solarium as well!
[Gary:] Have a go on the Stock Exchange shall we?
[Julie:] Gary, go on Gary throw in!
[Phil:] Three.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] How many did grab it in a pile and chuck it on there!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Let's hope there's there!
[Phil:] There should be a limit really! [LAUGHTER] There should be a limit really []!
[Julie:] That's three.
[Phil:] I think there should be a limit don't you?
[Julie:] one
[Shelly:] Yeah, twenty thousand!
[Julie:] two
[Phil:] Yeah!
[Julie:] three thousand! Go on Ga!
[Phil:] Well Mike used to do it like that
[Gary:] Ah!
[Phil:] and Mike lost all his!
[Gary:] Wait there! Can I have my
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Oh not that!
[Phil:] Mike got a really big head didn't he?
[Shelly:] Yep!
[Phil:] He bul
[Shelly:] You didn't get a thousand then
[Gary:] Hope so!
[Shelly:] plus did you?
[Phil:] Mike got really
[Julie:] Oh no!
[Phil:] big headed once
[Julie:] About that.
[Phil:] and thought he was gonna wi, how much you got there? How much you going for?
[Julie:] Three.
[Gary:] Three. Three thousand.
[Shelly:] I've got eight thousand. I can build
[Phil:] Righto! Ready boy?
[Gary:] Yep!
[Julie:] Get a two and he's on a winner with!
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Seven.
[Julie:] You're gaining another one.
[Phil:] Go for it!
[Gary:] Go again.
[Julie:] Ten.
[Shelly:] Ten.
[Gary:] Ten. That'll do.
[Julie:] Plus two times.
[Gary:] Yeah, that'll do.
[Shelly:] So he put in three thousand. Six thousand.
[Julie:] Six thousand back.
[Gary:] Shall I go? See what it'd have been shall I? Can we just see what it'll be?
[Julie:] Yeah, go on then.
[Gary:] Woa!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] ! Ooh! Ooh hoo!
[Phil:] I'd get quite a bit now
[Julie:] Well there you go!
[Phil:] can't I? Once I bought. And what have I gotta get?
[Julie:] And you've gotta get, you got that membership as well.
[Phil:] [whispering] One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four [].
[Gary:] [singing] It's a self preservation society []!
[Shelly:] Ooh gosh! I collect a thousand pounds! Wow!
[Gary:] Oh is nice to be down there!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Not really []!
[Gary:] I look down on you!
[Julie:] Eleven, one, two three, four, five
[Gary:] Look up at me!
[Julie:] six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.
[Phil:] Then it's you.
[Gary:] Because I'm in the high class and you're in the middle class!
[Shelly:] I only need my money now before I go
[Phil:] Oh!
[Shelly:] up.
[Gary:] One, two, three, four
[Phil:] Taxes! Pay taxes!
[Gary:] One dice or two dice?
[Julie:] Both.
[Shelly:] Both.
[Phil:] Both dices.
[Shelly:] Hundred times.
[Gary:] Four.
[Shelly:] Four hundred quid!
[Gary:] Oh that's alright.
[Shelly:] Four thousand quid!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Right. One, two, three, four, five. Divorce, pay alimony!
[Shelly:] Aargh!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] You bastard!
[Shelly:] He'll probably get double one now!
[Phil:] Doo, doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
[Julie:] Ah, as well please! [LAUGHTER] Ha []!
[Phil:] I know.
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Seven.
[Julie:] Seven back.
[Phil:] Now you can sell us our, our tickets back as well.
[Julie:] Ooh yeah!
[Shelly:] Ooh yeah! I need a couple
[Gary:] Yes!
[Shelly:] of them!
[Gary:] Shit!
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Gary:] Mm!
[Shelly:] Mm! Mm! Mm! Mm!
[Phil:] Seven thousand pound!
[Gary:] But you don't go pink one.
[Julie:] How much do you say? I had to pay eight didn't I?
[Gary:] Square her a yellow one.
[Phil:] I'm sure I had a pink one somewhere.
[Shelly:] Mm! Mm! Mm! Mm! Mm! Mm! Mm!
[Julie:] Such a shame! gotta pay them
[Phil:] It'll go round
[Julie:] twenty for... ten thousand haven't I?
[Shelly:] [singing] Mm mm []!
[Phil:] Will you... know what
[Julie:] .
[Phil:] That's mine.
[Julie:] Is that yours Phil.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] [singing] Mm mm mm
[Phil:] And
[Shelly:] mm mm mm mm mm mm
[Phil:] There you go Ga
[Shelly:] mm mm mm mm mm [].
[Julie:] Er excuse me! Some of us might want to bid on it!
[Phil:] Mm, we can't bid on it we're not in the top group.
[Shelly:] Ah no, ah ah!
[Gary:] No.
[Julie:] Oh well I needed
[Gary:] I'll have them
[Julie:] a couple of them.
[Gary:] [singing] Di di di di di di
[Julie:] No, we're in the higher!
[Gary:] di di da []
[Phil:] He's in the, he was in the higher group....
[Julie:] Shit! I can't buy there!
[Gary:] I was the only one up there!
[Shelly:] Yeah, so how much do we
[Phil:] Five hundred. Gotta give me my five hundred.
[Julie:] Is it five hundred?
[Gary:] [singing] Di di di di
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] di [].
[Julie:] Yeah, I don't like to say nothing.
[Phil:] He pa, he paid us
[Gary:] [singing] di di
[Phil:] er
[Gary:] di [].
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] Three thousand.
[Shelly:] Three thousand.
[Julie:] That's right. Five hundred and the
[Phil:] No!
[Julie:] three twenty innit?
[Gary:] [singing] Der di di di di da da da da er []!
[Julie:] Yeah. You get five plus, you have to pay five hundred and just
[Gary:] [singing] Dee di di da di di di di di di di di []
[Phil:] That's three thousand
[Julie:] twenty. So, it's my go isn't it?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, one, two and oh!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] What's that? Erm eight. Okay. One, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] [mimicking crying]
[Julie:] six, seven. Oh shit!
[Gary:] Eight.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Two hundred times.
[Julie:] Ooh! Wish I'd just said seven now! Bloody hell!
[Gary:] That's what I like about you Julie!
[Julie:] !
[Shelly:] Oh ah!
[Julie:] Flipping hell! Twelve hundred quid. It is twelve hundred this time!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Oh sod!
[Phil:] I can go up once I get my can't I?
[Shelly:] Ooh I need a couple of them tickets Ju!
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell!
[Gary:] Seven.
[Phil:] [singing] Nothing really matters
[Julie:] Right!
[Phil:] in the same
[Julie:] Don't get anything for one.
[Phil:] old way []!
[Shelly:] Oh I'll bid for it!
[Phil:] [singing] Even go a walking in the
[Gary:] Who's got the green ones?
[Phil:] same old
[Julie:] Oh I've got it!
[Phil:] way []!
[Gary:] What you whispering about?
[Shelly:] Yeah alright!
[Gary:] No bloody you two!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] oi! We wanna know what you're going on about!
[Shelly:] Just change.
[Gary:] What is it?
[Phil:] Aye!
[Gary:] Aye!
[Phil:] What about me? Don't I get a go?
[Gary:] Aye! No!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm in on this and all! What
[Phil:] That
[Gary:] is it?
[Phil:] That's a card for this innit?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] How much is it?
[Shelly:] Oh hundred and fifty!
[Julie:] Bid two hundred and fifty.
[Phil:] I'll give you five hundred.
[Gary:] six hundred.
[Julie:] Aye? Three hundred, how much?
[Phil:] I'll gi you five.
[Shelly:] Well you and your fucking money bags, keep it!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I'll give you six.
[Phil:] One thousand!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Listen to him []!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Any higher?
[Shelly:] One thousand, one hundred.
[Phil:] I'll gi you fifteen hundred cash on there!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Cash []!
[Phil:] Ah ah, I want that one anyway!
[Julie:] No more Phil?
[Phil:] No oh! No, I can wait!
[Shelly:] That's not you
[Julie:] Go on then!
[Shelly:] anyway! That
[Gary:] Shel?
[Shelly:] That's Gary's. No you get stuffed! I ain't paying that much
[Julie:] Here are!
[Shelly:] for it!
[Julie:] Here are! Here are, here's your money!
[Phil:] ... I'm losing all the money!
[Julie:] And that's his own anyway! You wanna
[Shelly:] I'll a go.
[Julie:] bid for it!
[Shelly:] And I don't, I'll get twenty er
[Julie:] No we were
[Gary:] How much do I get for this?
[Julie:] we were bidding for this!
[Gary:] Yeah!
[Julie:] So you me and Phil can bid against that one.
[Shelly:] That's right.
[Phil:] Bidding against me and I don't want that
[Julie:] Ooh right!
[Phil:] that's what I want.
[Shelly:] So what can you get? That's that.
[Julie:] Well you needed, yeah you needed that.
[Shelly:] I'll gi you a hundred and fifty.
[Phil:] What does she get back?
[Julie:] A hundred.
[Gary:] Right. Give you two.
[Julie:] Four.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Ha []!
[Gary:] Five.
[Julie:] Five fifty.
[Shelly:] I mean, only cost you five hundred anyway! Go on!
[Phil:] Alright then, go on then take it!
[Julie:] Alright.
[Shelly:] Do you want the money or can I pay you later?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh bloody hell!
[Phil:] I I'm buying my own race track! Cos I'll move Gary's up first.
[Julie:] Yeah. And I get
[Gary:] That's right.
[Julie:] we get for that one? Erm
[Shelly:] Oh that's another one we can bid on.
[Julie:] Oh yeah that's, yeah. That's another one
[Shelly:] Oh right!
[Julie:] you can have.
[Gary:] What's this one?
[Phil:] I I'll... I'll buy that.
[Gary:] What's this one we're bidding on?
[Julie:] Yeah you can bid three.
[Gary:] What we bidding on now?
[Shelly:] The card. There's a black... art gallery there.
[Gary:] Ee ee he shouldn't be able to buy them cos he's only just gone down!
[Phil:] Doesn't matter, I got the money!
[Shelly:] No it doesn't matter!
[Julie:] Still got the money! Well you can all
[Phil:] Cos I've come from higher class... to the low lower class.
[Julie:] You can all bid for that one cos that's the black art's gallery and you all need it, so
[Gary:] Black art's gallery in the middle of the road
[Julie:] Well you put, should only get another one.
[Phil:] I'll give you two hundred fifty.
[Shelly:] You can only get a hundred pounds for it.
[Gary:] I'll give you two fifty. How much?
[Phil:] I've just said two fifty!
[Gary:] I'll give you three hundred!
[Shelly:] I'll let you two bid for it then! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Go on!
[Phil:] Three and half.
[Gary:] Four.
[Phil:] Well, he's got one though ain't he? He don't need it!
[Shelly:] No he hasn't got one.
[Julie:] No he ain't got one.
[Phil:] What's that one then?
[Shelly:] He's only got membership.
[Gary:] Four.
[Phil:] What do we need
[Shelly:] Well you need
[Phil:] art gallery for?
[Shelly:] You need a membership and another
[Gary:] Do I need to go round before I can
[Shelly:] one of them or something.
[Gary:] before I
[Phil:] So I I'd I, I don't really want one!
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Cos I buy one
[Julie:] Well you can buy one, yeah.
[Phil:] Well then you can have it for whatever it was for.
[Julie:] Four hundred and fifty.
[Gary:] No I said four!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh yeah, four.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Try to, trying to up us!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I've just added on race course, alright?
[Gary:] Give us them two back... and we'll call it quits.
[Phil:] So... I'll put erm... two grand on that.
[Shelly:] I ain't got hundred!
[Gary:] Oh well, ah, you owe we hundred!
[Shelly:] You bugger off!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... What have you got?
[Gary:] Er, I just give you it! Five hundred innit?
[Julie:] That's for that one!
[Gary:] Oh is it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] No, that's what... Shel paid me
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] for that!
[Shelly:] I just gave her that! Look, this one!
[Julie:] I'm just miles, bloody hell! Miles away now!
[Gary:] I'm missing out on something here aren't I?
[Julie:] You owe me four, four hundred.
[Gary:] No! No! Just one.
[Julie:] Well change it in the bank
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] cos I haven't got it I'm afraid.
[Gary:] This... yeah, I got it in ones, so I'll give it you ones, alright.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... I've gone bloody back down to the bottom! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I landed on those ones.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] There you go!
[Phil:] Your black, I was just having a go.
[Julie:] I know but you only need six next [LAUGHTER] time []!
[Shelly:] Right, you want the race track how much you putting on?
[Phil:] Two.
[Shelly:] Two thousand.
[Julie:] What number.
[Phil:] Er, ten.
[Julie:] Ten.
[Phil:] Come on baby!
[Julie:] Seven. Eight.
[Phil:] Eight
[Shelly:] Have a go!
[Gary:] Not bad Phil! Put it in the bank!
[Julie:] Six. [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Leave it in the bank!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Look at his fa []!
[Phil:] I can't buy can I now?
[Julie:] Not yet, no not yet.
[Phil:] No, not until I go round
[Gary:] round once
[Phil:] to the... there?
[Julie:] No, like me I've gotta get round there.
[Phil:] Back round to there innit?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Shelly:] And I've just about nearly round.
[Phil:] Shit! Right. One, two, three, four, five, seven, eight, nine. No.
[Gary:] You could afford to go up Shel can't you?
[Shelly:] Oh I haven't got any car, I've only got one card.
[Gary:] Oh I'm doing okay, aren't I? Yes.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six... I can start buying now!
[Gary:] If I get pissed off now I might just do!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Course you can't, I can't go up anyway!
[Julie:] Nine.
[Gary:] Not yet.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight... lottery.
[Gary:] Lottery. Right, this is the fun bit. This is where we all bang in!
[Shelly:] You choose how much you wanna put in.
[Gary:] And we can all bang in with her!
[Shelly:] And the one who throws the highest wins it.
[Gary:] out of this we can all, we could all bang in!
[Julie:] Well I'm a bit er
[Gary:] But we gotta go the same as what you'd go.
[Julie:] Yeah, you gotta go the same
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] as what I go. [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] So if we go?
[Shelly:] Whatever you go I do
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] I'm chucking off my []
[Gary:] So if I went like that you've gotta go the same? Alright?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] No make it a thousand.
[Gary:] You would! What a little de, yeah!
[Julie:] Cos I'm a bit skint on the thousands.
[Gary:] I am as well darling! I know!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] But I'm hoping that I get the highest
[Gary:] Yeah. Alright.
[Julie:] Right, so you go first Phil!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm I'm the same as you... I'm the same darling!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] I'll make him feel
[Gary:] We're all skint! Seven.
[Phil:] Seven.
[Julie:] Look Gary's not gone out.
[Phil:] Well that's fucking brilliant that is isn't it!
[Gary:] That was devil! Do you want me to go again?
[Julie:] Seven.
[Phil:] Seven. That's, that's two at seven.
[Gary:] Two at seven. They'll have to go again by the sounds of it.
[Phil:] Five!
[Shelly:] Five!
[Julie:] Enough!
[Gary:] It looks like the seven will have to go again! You, you silly... for doing that darling!
[Julie:] Four.
[Phil:] Four.
[Gary:] Four.
[Phil:] ?
[Gary:] No, it don't count cos I didn't have that you cheat!
[Julie:] Oh [LAUGHTER] well you []
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] It's between these two whoever's gonna get this!
[Gary:] Someone's fixed these dice I tell you!
[Julie:] Oh
[Phil:] Ooh eleven!
[Julie:] shit! [LAUGHTER] You need twelve []!
[Phil:] Or eleven to draw.
[Gary:] We'll take the card!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Go on, get in there []!
[Gary:] Your go
[Phil:] My
[Gary:] innit?
[Phil:] That's my money back innit?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] My go?
[Shelly:] Yeah. No, Phil's go.
[Julie:] No, Phil's go.
[Gary:] Shit!
[Shelly:] Cos I just landed on the bottom.
[Julie:] He'll land on the divorce now!
[Gary:] Six.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] He has done []! I said that didn't I? [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You gotta sell Phil! You gotta sell your properties!
[Phil:] Four
[Julie:] Four
[Phil:] Four hundred.
[Julie:] Four hundred.
[Gary:] I'll pay... I'll give you four hundred for that bloody
[Julie:] Hang on! Hang on! Let him pay his alimony.
[Gary:] [cough] I'll five hundred for your card.
[Shelly:] Well that's not right cos I've got... that's wrong.
[Phil:] Five hundred.
[Julie:] I don't need it cos I'm on [LAUGHTER] the wrong one []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] And... she could of bought next time round anyway.
[Shelly:] I can buy now. What's that for?
[Phil:] That's my hundred pound.
[Julie:] Oh that's your change.
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] Gary's go.
[Phil:] I can't buy yet though can I?
[Shelly:] So me and Phil
[Julie:] No, I can.
[Shelly:] are back round again!
[Gary:] You sent that on to me!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] No, you're there!
[Julie:] You're there!
[Gary:] I've been round once ain't I?
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] No.
[Phil:] No. Try again mate! Oh I better count my money again
[Julie:] Eight.
[Phil:] hadn't I?
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. The Stock Exchange! Here we go again!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [singing] Nothing really matters in the [singing+laughing] same old
[Shelly:] Oh if I can get you this time!
[Phil:] way []! See the... [LAUGHTER] []! That did it
[Gary:] No.
[Shelly:] No way!
[Julie:] Mm. Eight.
[Gary:] Eight.
[Shelly:] Plus one thousand. So you get ten back.
[Gary:] I get ten thousand back, what's that? Roll again.
[Phil:] [whispering] Fucking hell []!
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] You're gaining back now.
[Phil:] Go for it!
[Shelly:] That's if I get a fucking eleven I'm gonna kick them up there!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yes! [LAUGHTER] Ha ha []!
[Julie:] Five.
[Shelly:] Move for half of it.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Bastard!
[Phil:] Well that's
[Shelly:] No, should of done it to me cos I threw!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I should of gained that. Should of.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I know []!
[Gary:] Not going greedy and offered a thousand shouldn't I?
[Shelly:] Right, where am I?
[Gary:] Was a thousand last week.
[Shelly:] Oh right!
[Gary:] Now it's ten P [LAUGHTER] for twenty pounds in there []!
[Shelly:] One, two
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] three, four, five, six.
[Gary:] Shall I get loads of them? I'm only talking about twelve pounds!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Right []! I'm off back round again!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Seven []!
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I can't buy anything yet.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] All this bloody money! Well more than what
[Shelly:] More than what you started with! [LAUGHTER] Look at his all sprawled out over there!
[Phil:] Yeah, that's what I said!
[Gary:] Two, three, four, five, six
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Six [].
[Gary:] four, five.
[Julie:] Oh well! Here we go!
[Shelly:] Now it's Phil's go. We gotta put it in whatever he puts in.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh shit []!
[Phil:] How much you got there Ga?
[Gary:] Not a lot mate!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I bet []!
[Gary:] I'm down to a measly
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] But I'm gonna now mate!
[Shelly:] Two, three, four, five... I've only got five thousand! [LAUGHTER]... [LAUGHTER] He's a bloody swine he is! You! You bastard []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] You've only got five thousand []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Well... not including my five hundred, so I've only got... er six thousand
[Phil:] You're not having no!
[Shelly:] seven thousand... seven tho, seven now... I can't even stretch to [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] So you got more than we got then! You got more than me!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, you []!
[Julie:] I'll clear that.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Ga
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I knew he was gonna do that []!
[Phil:] You got another five thousand cos you've just been
[Gary:] The same as that.
[Phil:] up haven't you?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] We got the same now!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Back... back to square one again Shel!
[Julie:] He's got five thousand! [LAUGHTER] How'd he get that []?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Are you being insolent []?
[Shelly:] Aha.
[Julie:] Yeah, but I'll tell you what I'll laugh like hell if I get the iron! Two, three
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] four
[Gary:] You don't care Ju do you? You love it!
[Julie:] five. No, I don't give a toss me!
[Phil:] Move on to
[Shelly:] But look!
[Gary:] fives.
[Shelly:] No but you love it!
[Gary:] Eighty five thousand.
[Julie:] Eighty five! That's only a thousand!
[Gary:] Oh! One thousand!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Two thousand, two thousand five, two thousand six
[Phil:] I aren't gonna bother!
[Julie:] two thousand seven
[Phil:] I've got ain't I?
[Julie:] three thousand eight.
[Gary:] Yeah you got to!
[Phil:] Can you find just one?
[Julie:] Here are! Two... no, two thousand eight
[Shelly:] No you gotta find
[Julie:] Eight. Right! Here we go! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yes I'll take that!
[Julie:] Eleven.
[Shelly:] Plus five times.
[Julie:] Fifty thousand she's got!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five!
[Gary:] Aha.
[Shelly:] Ooh! What! What! Three!
[Julie:] I'm ready to go up now look!
[Shelly:] One, two three. I can't buy anything yet! Well that's mine anyway look!
[Julie:] Ah, ha ha! Budgy boy! [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Four. One, two, three, four. I'll have a go on the stock exchange.
[Julie:] There are Ga! Cos you gotta throw.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I know.
[Julie:] He was [LAUGHTER] []!
[Shelly:] He's getting a bit skint now ain't he?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Is it me to go?
[Phil:] So when you'd gone down you
[Shelly:] So collect two hu two hundred when
[Phil:] You're nearly there aren't you?
[Gary:] I want seven.
[Phil:] Should have.
[Julie:] Oh yeah! No!
[Shelly:] You get your two hundred.
[Phil:] Your nearly there aren't you?
[Julie:] I've got that!
[Shelly:] I'm only in the middle though.
[Gary:] Oh yes!
[Phil:] Four thousand.
[Shelly:] Can't go up yet.
[Gary:] That's a shame!
[Julie:] Four thousand?
[Phil:] Go on then Ga!
[Gary:] Yeah, has to go up to
[Shelly:] No.
[Gary:] five thousand
[Phil:] [cough]
[Julie:] Go on then Ga! Seven
[Gary:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Regain investment.
[Gary:] I would think, well I don't.
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Go on []!
[Gary:] Four.
[Julie:] Four.
[Gary:] Well that's everything what I done! [LAUGHTER] Christ []!
[Shelly:] You lose a... a thousand don't you?
[Julie:] Only three quarters.
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Gary:] Three quarters
[Julie:] So they leave leave
[Gary:] so you leave a thousand.
[Julie:] Yep! [singing] Ha ha ha! What what what []!
[Gary:] That's everything that I done didn't I? Sorry mate!
[Julie:] No here!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Lose three quarters of investment. So you're only left with a thousand so
[Gary:] Twelve.
[Shelly:] Ooh! Cor!!
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve. Can I have my er... fucking need it!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Woa!
[Shelly:] Mm!
[Julie:] Five hundred pound!
[Gary:] Yes.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Eleven. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten
[Phil:] Terrible innit really!
[Julie:] eleven. Well I can buy but that's mine anyway!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Gary:] Ooh! Just missed it Phil!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Shaky mate weren't it!
[Julie:] Ten.
[Gary:] I got one!
[Julie:] Oh.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yo you've got one already Ga.
[Shelly:] Yes. Nearly a thousand already.
[Gary:] What number?
[Shelly:] On number eight. No, seven. One, two
[Gary:] How much do I need?
[Shelly:] three, four, five, six, seven.
[Gary:] How much do I need to go up again?
[Julie:] Er... oh I've forgotten now!
[Shelly:] Erm, ten thousand from there to the top.
[Phil:] Er er we've had one thousand.
[Shelly:] Which is one of these four.
[Gary:] I'm going up! Next
[Shelly:] What?
[Gary:] go.
[Julie:] Yeah, he's got his money ain't he?
[Shelly:] Well stick yourself in the highest class.
[Phil:] A and why do you think I haven't said anything cos he could of gone up!
[Shelly:] Oh no, he's gotta pass middle. He's gotta get passed
[Julie:] Oh you've gotta pass there.
[Gary:] That's why I'm not going up innit?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] I've been round once haven't I?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah but you gotta pass mine.
[Gary:] That's right! That's why I say I'm going up next go.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I'll have one of them!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Stick that up your jumper []!
[Julie:] Well I cos it's only hundred pound innit? I can afford one of them Ga.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh very funny darling!
[Julie:] Right, that's one of mine on the way!
[Gary:] Doesn't see you! Doesn't see you!
[Phil:] Five.
[Gary:] Means it doesn't suit you!
[Phil:] One, two, three
[Gary:] Okay?
[Phil:] four, five. Oh!... That's Gary.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Gary:] One, two, three. I'm on the race track. Cos I'm going up see what happens. Do I go on the racetrack Six, no! or not?
[Phil:] You carry on. You just go straight up.
[Julie:] You can have a go on the racetrack.
[Shelly:] Aye!
[Phil:] I if that was the case my twelve should have carried on. When I was down
[Gary:] No. On that... then I sa, I said I was going anyway.
[Phil:] I know.
[Gary:] But I was on the race, I was going on the race track. Do I go on the race track or do I go straight up?
[Julie:] Yeah, his... his number's on the dice happen to leave him so he was on the race track, so it's up to him now.
[Phil:] Yeah but mine left me u... down the bottom
[Gary:] No, but you
[Phil:] somewhere on the Stock
[Gary:] yeah but that was you
[Phil:] Exchange or something like that.
[Gary:] No it wasn't Stock Exchange!
[Shelly:] No, you were on that. On there.
[Julie:] So he can have a go on the race track or he don't have to bother if he don't want to. He can just go straight up.
[Gary:] But I can go straight up there anyway!
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] But... me like I am... being a greedy bastard I didn't!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's making money me money so you can't go up!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'll go for race track.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Phil:] Aha. What number you going on?
[Shelly:] How can I rig these dice?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] No cheating Shelly!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Julie:] Ooh!
[Shelly:] Ooh!
[Julie:] Bloody hell!
[Phil:] You still waiting this to go up haven't you?
[Shelly:] Gonna carry on? Or
[Gary:] I haven't said a number yet!
[Phil:] Ain't said a number yet.
[Gary:] It's turn innit?
[Shelly:] Oh no! You do that one then don't you?
[Phil:] Why's that?
[Shelly:] I've got to bloody!
[Phil:] Go down further out than that don't get any money!
[Julie:] No, two for the money as well!
[Gary:] Eight.
[Shelly:] Five.
[Julie:] Nine.
[Shelly:] Nine.
[Gary:] Bastard!
[Julie:] Mm mm.
[Shelly:] Eight.
[Gary:] Yeah! Ho ooh!
[Julie:] Ten to one.
[Gary:] Oh! Which is?
[Julie:] Another two of that one.
[Gary:] Another two of them will do me then.
[Phil:] No!
[Gary:] Two to one.
[Phil:] Just one more!
[Gary:] No! Two to one!
[Julie:] No, you get your back.
[Gary:] I get my two plus my, my investment back.
[Julie:] Yes.
[Gary:] I'm on... high class anyway. So I'm selling these in a minute Shel.
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Gary:] Anybody on middle class wanna buy them. Who's on middle class?
[Julie:] No.
[Shelly:] I am. Oh! Well Shel do you wanna buy them?
[Phil:] You got one more in the
[Shelly:] Oh shit! One for my own anyway cos I've gotta give you back... hundred pound for that one
[Gary:] Five hundred!
[Shelly:] Hundred!
[Julie:] No! Hundred!
[Shelly:] It's my own.
[Gary:] Oh is it?
[Shelly:] Mhm.
[Gary:] Oh! What about the Yacht Club.
[Shelly:] Yours, I'll have, ooh you a Yacht Club and a black burger.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Shelly:] A nig-nog! Um
[Gary:] Will I get in the er... if I sell them back?
[Shelly:] You don't get nothing for that. I'll give you fifty quid for that one.
[Julie:] And a hundred for the other one... you get back.
[Gary:] No I wouldn't get more than
[Shelly:] If I give you two hundred for... the both of them together.
[Gary:] No! Two hundred for that one.
[Shelly:] Can't I
[Julie:] No, you don't get, you don't get anything for the membership!
[Gary:] Well put that one back then.
[Shelly:] Can't I buy it off you?
[Gary:] Nope!
[Julie:] Oh you rotten thing!
[Gary:] And put that one back as well!
[Shelly:] So he gets bloody
[Phil:] Yeah, she's gotta get one membership. Told you you could of done it to him after you let him buy them last time!
[Shelly:] I was kind to you last time! Right!
[Gary:] Yeah, but I'm up now I don't want you to come up yet do I?
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six. Welfare payments times the
[Gary:] If you come up you've won haven't you?
[Shelly:] roll of one dice. Yeah! Near enough.
[Gary:] Well then!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... Oh! She's got fifty pound!
[Phil:] She's got more money than you mate!
[Gary:] I know. But if she comes up she's won ain't she?
[Phil:] Might sell it back to you.
[Gary:] Yeah, but she's gotta go up to win ain't she? And if I let her out I'm stupid aren't I? She's won the fucking game!
[Julie:] Two. I'll have one of those.
[Phil:] Black Art's
[Gary:] You sure?
[Phil:] Gallery.
[Julie:] I'll have one of the Black Art's Gallery.
[Gary:] [cough]... God! Sorry!
[Shelly:] Die quietly!
[Phil:] Stock Exchange again! Gary! You gonna do better for me this time Ga?
[Julie:] Apart from one of the Black Art's
[Gary:] Course I will mate! Course I will!
[Julie:] Then I only need
[Gary:] Who's on Stock Exchange?
[Julie:] then.
[Shelly:] Ta.
[Gary:] Two thousand back. We want one.
[Shelly:] One what?
[Phil:] Just get it!
[Gary:] Stop that out there! Is that seven?
[Shelly:] Seven. Get your.
[Phil:] No, ten we want.
[Gary:] You sure?
[Phil:] That'll do me!
[Shelly:] Ten.
[Phil:] Ten. That'll do me!
[Shelly:] Plus two times.
[Julie:] Yep!
[Shelly:] Plus my four thousand.
[Phil:] Four thousand.
[Shelly:] Give us one of them back then.
[Gary:] Right. One, two, three, four, five
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] One, two, three.
[Julie:] Lovely! I love it!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Throw the dice.
[Julie:] Serves you right!
[Shelly:] A hundred times! [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] I said to mysel, I said to [LAUGHTER] myself
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm not going on that one [] I'll
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] and now it's that!
[Phil:] Then you got a sa... a ah you went and got
[Gary:] I had a [LAUGHTER] []!
[Shelly:] Nine thousand!
[Gary:] I had a fucking policeman... anyway didn't I!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I don't want to go up anyway!
[Gary:] Bastard!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Just got rid of all your cards []!
[Phil:] Oh screw you! No, fucking pissing... game
[Shelly:] Oh I'll buy one of them! Oh I'll get my thousands.
[Gary:] You been round... once?
[Shelly:] I've been round a couple times thank you been up there ages!
[Gary:] Get another tape out in a minute Ju!
[Julie:] Aye?
[Shelly:] Erm
[Gary:] Get another tape out in a minute!
[Shelly:] six hundred. Pay six hundred for it. And I'll
[Julie:] [cough]
[Gary:] Typical innit! Go up jus to get banged [LAUGHTER] back down again []!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Shelly:] All I need now is another card.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
[Gary:] I've only sold one of these
[Julie:] Well I want the bloody
[Gary:] cards at the moment!
[Julie:] membership or something.
[Gary:] You going for that card are you?
[Phil:] One, two, three. I'll buy that one. Who's got green? That's alright, I'll buy that one then.
[Shelly:] [singing] Ooh microwave oven []!
[Phil:] I'm not buying e, anyone else's!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You tight sod []!
[Phil:] No! I'm not
[Julie:] [cough]
[Gary:] Thanks mate!
[Shelly:] Why not? I helped you two by giving you two thousand of mine.
[Phil:] No, no one
[Gary:] Seven. One, two, three
[Phil:] no one helped me!
[Gary:] four, five, six
[Julie:] You didn't help me!
[Shelly:] I did!
[Julie:] You didn't help me when you were
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Lovely! I love it!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Four hundred times
[Gary:] [cough]
[Phil:] is the amount of dice.
[Gary:] [cough]
[Julie:] Four hundred.
[Phil:] Four hundred.
[Gary:] Ding, ding ding ding ding.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] And you gotta go all the way round the board!
[Julie:] , one, two, three, four, five. Shit! Seven. Five hundred times
[Phil:] Yeah but he can't gi, so that means you can't go up cos you haven't got a chance to buy one.
[Julie:] Ten. One, two
[Shelly:] Why?
[Julie:] three, four, five, six, seven eight, nine
[Phil:] Not before you get to there!
[Julie:] ten.
[Vicki:] You need to have one more to get, buy one and then go up.
[Julie:] Oh I don't need one of them cos I've got my I've got my two er things, I just need er
[Gary:] I only wanted a couple of laps up round there
[Julie:] membership and all.
[Gary:] I wouldn't give a shit then! I wouldn't mind a couple!
[Shelly:] How near am I now?
[Phil:] Eight.
[Gary:] Very close!
[Phil:] Two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Shelly:] Three, four, five, six, seven... eight.
[Phil:] Eight.!
[Julie:] Phil,
[Shelly:] . Ooh! We, can we do it!
[Phil:] I'll give it another grand on th... eights.
[Shelly:] Oh wow!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Right?
[Gary:] On eights?
[Phil:] No, wait there!
[Julie:] You want one or two to one.
[Phil:] I'll have go on at nines alright?
[Shelly:] Mhm.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You should of gone eight!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Seven.
[Phil:] Eight.
[Shelly:] Oh yeah, eight!
[Phil:] That's on eight.
[Gary:] Seven. Look at that!
[Shelly:] And you were saying about... don't do you any favours, you didn't do me any when you stuck bloody five hundred on the fucking lottery!
[Julie:] Five thousand!
[Gary:] Can't do anything with it!
[Shelly:] Five thousand!
[Phil:] I'm I'm divorced.
[Shelly:] Five thousand Phil, and that's all I had left!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No, I made sure you had eight thousand!
[Shelly:] seven, eight, nine, ten. Oh! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Julie:] Yeah eight times.
[Shelly:] Oh God we're all back down on the bloody board [LAUGHTER] now []!
[Gary:] Come on then!
[Phil:] You got the lottery again.
[Julie:] Oh fucking nine hundred quid!
[Gary:] [singing] Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo []. See you down the bottom Shel! [singing] Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo []! See you down the bottom Shel!
[Shelly:] And you said you could play most
[Julie:] Four.
[Shelly:] games with him on nights.
[Julie:] Go four.
[Gary:] You can keep hold of them can't you?
[Julie:] Don't need that cos I got my two
[Shelly:] No.
[Julie:] things on
[Shelly:] You gotta sell these ones now.
[Gary:] No you haven't!
[Shelly:] Yeah I've gotta get rid of them cos then we're
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] bidding the bottom of that.
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] Right.
[Phil:] seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Gary:] I thought you keep hold of that Ju?
[Julie:] So you owe me... a hundred pound.
[Gary:] I thought you could keep hold of that?
[Phil:] Eleven.
[Julie:] No!
[Gary:] Have I gotta give you money?
[Julie:] He's up to the middle class!
[Shelly:] You have, yeah actually.
[Gary:] One, two, [LAUGHTER] three, four [] five
[Phil:] Have a drag for the next hour!
[Gary:] One, two
[Phil:] Racetrack.
[Gary:] three, five!
[Phil:] Race, racetrack.
[Julie:] Four!
[Shelly:] Four!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Five []!
[Shelly:] And racetrack.
[Phil:] Racetrack. I had eleven.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yes?
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Yeah. He's up then. So you're selling yours Phil?
[Phil:] Yes. Anyone wanna buy one?
[Julie:] No because I've got.
[Gary:] What are they lower class?
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah! Lower class []!
[Julie:] Lower class.
[Gary:] I'm in the lower class. How much?
[Shelly:] I'll give you fifty!
[Gary:] I'll gi you hundred.
[Shelly:] I'll give you hundred and fifty.
[Gary:] Two hundred.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Keep it []!
[Julie:] I don't need another race.
[Gary:] Two hundred so er
[Shelly:] No, two hundred and fifty!
[Julie:] I want a
[Phil:] Two hundred and fifty.
[Gary:] You can have it then!
[Shelly:] We've all gotta go round once yet anyway!
[Julie:] Mm.
[Gary:] So have I!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Your go Ga!
[Gary:] Eight. One, two, three, four, five, one, two, three. Racetrack.
[Phil:] Racetrack.
[Julie:] Racetrack.
[Shelly:] Just ten pounds.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Your money must be going quick!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I've still got
[Julie:] Ooh!
[Shelly:] eighty thousand there.
[Julie:] He's putting ten thousand on the racetrack!
[Phil:] On racetrack!
[Gary:] Eight.
[Phil:] No I had eight. Seven.
[Shelly:] Eight it is! He goes twel...
[Julie:] Seventy thousand.
[Shelly:] back?
[Julie:] He's, he's got the same amount as me now.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell!
[Shelly:] Three fifty down there.
[Julie:] One, two, three
[Shelly:] Gary!
[Julie:] , five, six, seven. Ten thousand commission.
[Shelly:] Right, my go is it?
[Julie:] Is that thunder?
[Gary:] Mm. Mm.
[Julie:] It might be them downstairs. Oh God! Where am I?
[Phil:] You gotta go round yet.
[Julie:] Ten. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Gary:] [cough]
[Shelly:] Shame I won on that lottery Gary! I could put a couple of these in!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Julie:] Ah! I want one of them Shel!
[Gary:] Night school... diploma.
[Julie:] That's all I want.
[Shelly:] Fifty pounds innit?
[Julie:] Yep.
[Shelly:] Diploma is that one is it?
[Julie:] And how much d'you need? Five thousand?
[Phil:] Five thousand to get it.
[Julie:] I'm going up next time.
[Phil:] When you get round to there.
[Shelly:] Oh you gotta back past yet.
[Julie:] Yeah. Oh yes, I know.
[Gary:] I'll buy you card darling!
[Phil:] What's that, eleven?
[Julie:] I ain't got there yet Gary! I've just gone
[Phil:] Eleven
[Julie:] past the bloody thing!
[Shelly:] Yeah.... Do you want er diploma?
[Phil:] I can't buy it I haven't got been round.
[Gary:] No he's
[Shelly:] Oh no!
[Gary:] go round once ain't he? Twelve. One, two, three, four, can I have my money? Five, six, [LAUGHTER] seven, eight, nine [], ten, eleven, twelve. What's that one?
[Shelly:] Somebody's got a lot of hundreds
[Julie:] One of mine!
[Gary:] Yeah I'll
[Julie:] No you can't buy it! You haven't been round yet.
[Gary:] Well let's see if I've got some here.
[Shelly:] Somebody's gotta change up some hundreds.
[Gary:] Yeah, I've got some hundreds, here are.
[Julie:] Oh yeah! I think we've got some!
[Gary:] Two, three, four
[Shelly:] I've only got two!
[Gary:] five, six, seven
[Shelly:] going.
[Gary:] eight, nine, I'll have, I'll have ten.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Gary:] I'll have ten thousand.
[Shelly:] eight, nine, ten. I'm on the Stock Exchange.
[Julie:] Oh I can't, I've only got four!
[Gary:] I'll have ten thousand.
[Phil:] I've got five.
[Julie:] He's got, they've got loads!
[Shelly:] A thousand!
[Gary:] Oh! Well, sorry! Yeah.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I'm not that stupid []! One, two
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Aren't you []?
[Shelly:] three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Gary:] I'll have another five then. Five thousand. Five thousand.
[Julie:] No wonder I've only got a four! And you've got them all Gary!
[Shelly:] Right, I've gotta collect two
[Gary:] Trying to keep mine quiet!
[Shelly:] hundred for going round
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] there, I'll put that straight in on the Sto... no I won't! I'll put... It's me I ain't got enough!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Why do you want a sub here?
[Shelly:] I was going ten thousand on the Stock Exchange.
[Gary:] Ju?
[Julie:] Mm?
[Gary:] Look at this!
[Julie:] Shel,.
[Gary:] Bloody awful in't it?
[Shelly:] Mm mm!
[Julie:] Five. [LAUGHTER] Two! Now I'm on the Stock E []
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Keep a low one please babe. Oh!
[Shelly:] Eight.
[Phil:] You idiot!
[Shelly:] Plus one half. So I get a pink one and that back. That's not as bad.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] It's losing the lot []!
[Phil:] Oh what a shame!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Shelly:] What d'you mean what a shame?
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Ooh, here we go again!
[Phil:] Yeah. I reckon we should put a halt on this bloody hundred thousands don't you?
[Julie:] Twenty thousand roll of both dice for the football winnings!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ooh! Ooh!
[Phil:] These ten thousands.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] What's that?
[Phil:] You land
[Julie:] One twenty
[Phil:] Hundred and ten pounds.
[Gary:] No, twenty times!
[Julie:] Twenty times
[Phil:] What twenty?
[Julie:] eleven.
[Phil:] Two hundred and twenty.
[Gary:] Two hundred and twenty.
[Julie:] Oh yes, so it is! There are Ga.
[Gary:] for me weren't it?
[Shelly:] Mm mm.
[Gary:] Won't you?
[Julie:] Mm! That's not bad. I don't mind. If I hadn't have got that twenty thousand
[Gary:] Seven.
[Julie:] I would have been right down!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Seven. One, two, three, four
[Julie:] Well fifteen thousand.
[Gary:] five, six... seven. I'll buy it!
[Phil:] No, don't buy that one!
[Shelly:] That's
[Gary:] No
[Phil:] Buy it for a thousand... or whatever. Four. Where am I?
[Gary:] One, two, three, four. What's that?
[Julie:] finger!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] finger []!
[Phil:] I can't buy it!
[Shelly:] Seven hundred pound. [LAUGHTER] Well what d'you mean you can't buy it []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] You haven't been round once yet!
[Julie:] Shit!
[Phil:] Nor have you.
[Shelly:] No, I was only one away from the wedding.
[Gary:] Moor View? That's in erm I've heard of Moor View, that's in... Chuddley innit, Moor View?
[Julie:] Nine. One, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] Innit?
[Julie:] six, seven, eight,
[Shelly:] There's a Moorland View
[Julie:] nine.
[Shelly:] in Buckland
[Julie:] Oh shit! I need buy a new, new horse.
[Gary:] No, there's Moor View in Chuddley
[Julie:] And it's ten times roll of one dice. I've gotta pay that have I?
[Shelly:] Yep!
[Gary:] Mm. I would have thought so darling. They're not gonna pay you! One!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's on that? Cos have you got a? Where's the
[Phil:] That's mine!
[Gary:] Who's got the controls?
[Julie:] Me! It don't matter about the
[Phil:] Nine.
[Julie:] telly.
[Gary:] Well turn it off then!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] Wasting more electric!
[Phil:] six, seven, eight
[Gary:] D'you want it off?
[Julie:] Mm.
[Phil:] nine. Credit due
[Gary:] Ooh it's Barbara Streisand!
[Shelly:] You in't got any credit!
[Gary:] Shit hang on! It's our Barbara!
[Julie:] You can't turn it up Gary!
[Gary:] I'll tell you to fucking!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... It's our Barbara! I'm telling you to fu... you can switch that lamp up if you want.
[Gary:] What's this one? Is this here?
[Julie:] That's just a blank one.
[Gary:] Right then..
[Julie:] Don't need that on. That's better innit?
[Gary:] Ooh shit!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Ooh!
[Phil:] Go on then, your go Ga!
[Shelly:] That must sound disgusting! Turn the light off. Bang! Your go Ga!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] It's []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Look at that! One, two, three.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] You wanna do a porno one for them []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Ah yes, I'm coming! I'm coming! I'm coming! Ah!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] You got it baby []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Go on. Oh!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Ooh I've gone all hot and sweaty! Gone all hot and sweaty!
[Julie:] Five. One, two, three, four, five. Ooh! Oh I don't need anything! I'm going to get round to there!
[Phil:] Four. One, two, three, four. Football winnings. Hundred times roll of dice.
[Julie:] Both dice.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] You son of a
[Phil:] Hundred times. One thousand two hundred.
[Julie:] Yep!
[Shelly:] Hundred and twenty.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Five. One, two, three, four, five. Can I have... oh I'll buy that one myself.
[Phil:] Buy that one boyos!
[Gary:] Can't afford it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []
[Gary:] Can't afford it. Don't know if I can afford it.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Thank you. Oh I just might be able to afford that.
[Shelly:] Ooh! I'll have another go on the Stock Exchange.
[Gary:] Ooh!
[Shelly:] Julie!
[Julie:] Oh yeah it is innit?
[Gary:] No you were showing on the bottom of me aren't you?
[Shelly:] Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
[Julie:] Ten.
[Shelly:] I'll keep that. That and two times.
[Julie:] Plus two times.
[Shelly:] Ooh bugger me! Bugger me! My money's gone right up! No I think I got ten thousand there ain't I?
[Julie:] Six. One, two, three, four, five, six.
[Phil:] I've already passed that.
[Julie:] to the bloody end!
[Shelly:] Have you?
[Phil:] Mm mm.
[Julie:] One, two, three, four
[Phil:] Well I had seven, you only had four.
[Julie:] five, six, seven
[Gary:] Five.
[Julie:] seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Phil:] One, two, three, four.
[Julie:] Ten thousand? I'm already past that.
[Gary:] I'm over it! I'm over it! Yeah, and me.
[Phil:] I'll buy that one.
[Shelly:] I mean, that's a hundred thousand!
[Julie:] a hundred and fifteen.
[Phil:] Aha, I'm over the hundred thousand I mean.
[Shelly:] Oh are you?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] I'll buy that one, who's got that one?
[Shelly:] Me! Me! Three thousand.
[Gary:] Three hundred.
[Julie:] No five hundred.
[Shelly:] Five hundred.
[Gary:] A, one, two
[Shelly:] Ooh it's the necklace again! We just got rid
[Gary:] Right.
[Shelly:] of one them!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Did I lose one? Did I
[Gary:] Four.
[Phil:] lose one? No. One, two
[Gary:] Five.
[Phil:] three, four five, five, six, seven eight, nine, eight.
[Gary:] Well at least I got
[Phil:] nine, eight.
[Gary:] past that.
[Phil:] Eight. I've only, I've only got eight
[Shelly:] Till the next time though!
[Phil:] I've miscounted now!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Did I lose one somewhere along the way?
[Gary:] Go on your go!
[Phil:] Jus, yeah I did I lost one on something didn't I? On one of the.... Tha on the er... racetrack.
[Julie:] Yeah, then you won again didn't you?
[Phil:] Did I?
[Gary:] Six. Browns I don't really wanna buy that do I?
[Shelly:] Four. One, two, three, four.. I'm gonna have to change up
[Phil:] Big money!
[Shelly:] some of these hundreds.
[Julie:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, six.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five
[Julie:] seven. Ooh!
[Gary:] On the Stocks
[Julie:] Stock Exchange! But I'm going up anyway next time. No. No.
[Gary:] See the bottom of the Stock Exchange is still
[Julie:] Yeah!
[Gary:] going up!
[Shelly:] Ah yeah, but we used to have three thousand have to go up with.
[Julie:] Yeah!
[Gary:] Ah!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Ah!
[Shelly:] No, five thousand!
[Julie:] Five, yep! So if I put, oh no it's only throwing it innit?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... No
[Gary:] What?
[Julie:] five thousand Phil.
[Shelly:] Yeah, you wanted twenty thousand didn't you?
[Gary:] Eight.
[Phil:] Eight. Invest plus one half.
[Julie:] No, go on.
[Phil:] Just investment.
[Gary:] Seven.
[Phil:] Seven less.
[Julie:] Go on.
[Phil:] Regain investment. And regain investment
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh free []!
[Phil:] free.
[Shelly:] total except ten. So the ten pounds you get back innit?
[Gary:] Yep!
[Julie:] Yeah. Yeah, I still got er
[Gary:] Said to you regain investment! And now you're up anyway in't you?
[Julie:] We got some stuff to.
[Gary:] Yeah, she's going up.
[Julie:] Yes I got some
[Shelly:] Oh right! I need some stuff. Right!
[Phil:] Oh yes Ga!
[Shelly:] Oh well Gary can't have the brown one cos that's his anyway.
[Gary:] No, so
[Julie:] Right, so yo... you can can't you?
[Shelly:] So he could, you could only get twenty Phil, so I'll give you thirty. [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah, go on then!
[Phil:] You sell
[Julie:] Right!
[Phil:] I would have chucked more than that off, loads of it!
[Shelly:] Alright I'll give you a hundred! There you go!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] That's how much you would have fucking paid me anyway!
[Julie:] Right! What do you, you can have either of these two.
[Phil:] I'll have both of them, I'll give you a
[Julie:] Shel only needs the diploma.
[Phil:] I'll gi you five thousand... on both. No I won't!
[Shelly:] Five thousand!
[Phil:] A thousand, I'll gi you a thousand for them both.
[Gary:] Shel gonna
[Shelly:] I paid a
[Julie:] How much do you
[Shelly:] thousand just for the diploma!
[Julie:] So how much for the diploma?
[Gary:] Aye? You don't want them up in the top... the next group
[Phil:] Do I want
[Gary:] with us do you?
[Phil:] Do I need, I need a
[Gary:] You don't want them in the next group with us do you?
[Phil:] country club don't I, to go up?
[Gary:] Well just give the diploma back to.
[Phil:] Will the diploma take me up if I had them two?
[Shelly:] If you bought both of them, yeah.
[Gary:] Yes. That'll take you up next time round. You don't want that do you?
[Shelly:] I'm giving a thousand
[Gary:] They got all the money!
[Shelly:] just for that!
[Gary:] They got all the money!
[Phil:] Well I'll give you two for both.
[Julie:] That's right. Now,.
[Shelly:] What?
[Gary:] Put them in the bank.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Fair enough!
[Phil:] You gotta get on them haven't you?
[Shelly:] So how much d'you get back? Twenty innit?
[Julie:] Only twenty.
[Gary:] Right! No!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Ah! I'll remember that!
[Gary:] Well that's stupid! I wouldn't do
[Phil:] What?
[Gary:] it like that!
[Julie:] You did to me!
[Gary:] That was, I was, I was in the money!
[Shelly:] Yeah, you said Phil said that you two have got all the money!
[Phil:] She sa, she needs some money doesn't she?
[Gary:] Four.
[Phil:] Yeah, but you need the money!
[Julie:] Mm.
[Gary:] Who's got the red ones?
[Phil:] Over two grand! You jus, just
[Gary:] Who's got the red ones?
[Phil:] Well you made plus hundred
[Gary:] Those?
[Phil:] and twenty!
[Julie:] What d'you want?
[Gary:] Okay? I'll buy that one off you.
[Phil:] No wonder I fucking got no money
[Shelly:] No, you make them the same as us!
[Phil:] in the bank!
[Julie:] Ooh a five hundred one!
[Phil:] You all chucking it away like that!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] There you go!
[Phil:] I'll have one of them anyway, country club.
[Shelly:] Fifty pounds!
[Phil:] So shove it where the!
[Julie:] There are see, you've landed on it now!
[Shelly:] [cough]
[Gary:] Have I got a fifty pound? It's one of them big ones, I haven't seen one of them before! First one of them I've seen! I didn't know we had them!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I've been seeing
[Julie:] We started off with them!
[Gary:] I've been seeing these funny yellow ones! I don't know what they are!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Go up and go down!
[Shelly:] The ten thousands we haven't even seen yet!
[Gary:] They go and go down! [LAUGHTER] They keep going then going down []! Well they're fucking doing well
[Julie:] Oh well!
[Gary:] aren't they?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Oh shit!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] How can you cos they ain't got it? Fucking ridiculous! You got,ha, what have they got?
[Phil:] I got ten thousand.
[Gary:] You can only go what they've got. Mm. Probably have actually.
[Shelly:] No you don't. I go five thousand.
[Gary:] Right. Cos they can go that actually.
[Shelly:] And you gotta go in like Julie!
[Gary:] It's only cos the.
[Julie:] Oh my God!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm not gonna do, I'm not I'm not going in.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You don't have to go in do you?
[Julie:] Yes
[Shelly:] No.
[Julie:] you do.
[Shelly:] No you don't!
[Julie:] Oh don't you?
[Gary:] You don't, no.
[Phil:] Don't you?
[Gary:] But I'm gonna cos I'm... I'm like that. You go two fives?
[Phil:] And if you don't, I'll I'll cry!
[Julie:] You just take one of them out.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I need my to go up in a minute.
[Gary:] Okay.
[Shelly:] So are you going for it or not?
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Julie:] I've still got
[Shelly:] ... Five, six, seven
[Gary:] No, you've gotta go in it
[Shelly:] eight.
[Gary:] you gotta go in it! Everybody's gotta do it in the long run.
[Julie:] I've still got ten thousand.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] No they haven't []!
[Gary:] Haven't they?
[Julie:] But I've only just gone up anyway.
[Shelly:] You're chickening out are? [mimics chicken]
[Gary:] Alright then I'll... I'll go up.
[Julie:] So who's in it?
[Gary:] Everybody.
[Shelly:] All of us.
[Julie:] All of us?... Eight.
[Phil:] One nice!
[Julie:] Sh!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] ... [LAUGHTER] He'll take won't he the next time []?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Five.
[Shelly:] Six. Oh I'm winning so far!
[Gary:] Don't let her win Ju!
[Shelly:] Make it a nine.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Shit!
[Gary:] Told you Ju!
[Shelly:] Eight two!
[Julie:] Anyone wanna buy a crystal thing?
[Gary:] Who the hell is it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No! You can have it.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] A crystal []!
[Phil:] She's not been round once.
[Shelly:] Eleven. One, two,
[Phil:] Ah!
[Shelly:] three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.
[Julie:] D'you know what's nice? Toast dipped in tea!
[Shelly:] Yeah. I gotta go all the way round yet. Oh God!
[Julie:] Toast, yeah, in tea it's quite nice.
[Shelly:] Oh toast dipped in tea, yeah! The only trouble is you get all
[Phil:] Four.
[Shelly:] butter floating [LAUGHTER] on the top of you cup of tea []!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four. Take, and a thousand pound. What's that one? What's a?
[Gary:] Never mind one of them! I don't need another one of them!
[Phil:] Mm.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You what? Vagina!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, something like that, yeah []! Two.
[Julie:] That's a good start love!
[Gary:] I'll have that one! Cos I need one of them to go up.
[Shelly:] Hundred pound.
[Gary:] Do I want one of them?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Do I?
[Julie:] Yep!
[Gary:] Have I got hundred pound?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] But you still gotta pay up
[Gary:] Julie's coming on alright now aren't you? You jammy sod!
[Julie:] Well not really.
[Gary:] Well you got a couple of yellow ones now!
[Julie:] No, one!
[Shelly:] One.
[Gary:] Oh and the be
[Shelly:] One, two, three
[Gary:] pink. Quite a few pink.
[Shelly:] Twenty times roll of both dice.
[Gary:] Two!
[Julie:] That's thirty thousand that's all! Eight.
[Gary:] Eight. Hundred and si, three hundred and sixty.
[Julie:] You still got more than me!
[Shelly:] Oh yeah! One sixty.
[Julie:] Nine. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
[Shelly:] Ain't it gone quiet!
[Gary:] She daren't buy it you see!
[Julie:] Right.
[Phil:] I've had no money yet!
[Julie:] Oh you want money do you?
[Gary:] Have I been round once?
[Shelly:] Oh! No, you're just coming up to your first round.
[Julie:] I
[Gary:] I
[Julie:] ain't been round yet.
[Gary:] I thought I had already.
[Shelly:] Well you must have been round because you've
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] one. How have you been round.
[Gary:] I just missed that wedding.
[Phil:] No he in't... but
[Julie:] No. But
[Gary:] Do I need to go round. Yeah I do don't I? No, cos I bought them off erm... somebody just go another
[Shelly:] Yeah you just bought off me though!
[Gary:] one on.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] So I gotta give you the hundred back, you gotta give me five back.
[Gary:] That's right!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Ha ha ha []!
[Gary:] Cos I can't buy it can I? Just missed the wedding by one!
[Shelly:] I've been round already haven't I?
[Gary:] No idea!
[Phil:] Can I have my hundred please?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight... nine!
[Shelly:] You got a hundred on both of those?
[Gary:] Oh you're next to me now cos
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] That's one of mine Ga! You need that. D'you want it?
[Shelly:] He's gotta go round yet!
[Gary:] Haven't been round have I?
[Julie:] Oh you haven't been round!
[Gary:] I haven't been round so I can't have it! They just took it back off me!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] One, two, three, four, five [], six, seven, eight. Ooh! [singing] Here we go! Here we go! Here we go []!
[Julie:] Here we go! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Just you dare!
[Phil:] Now!
[Gary:] Keep them low babe!
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Gary:] And again babe! Keep them low!
[Shelly:] That's two fours.
[Gary:] when you get a low one and you get seven.
[Julie:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Regain investment.
[Julie:] Phooey!
[Gary:] Whoa! Shaky, shaky Shelley! [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] two, three, four, five, six. I can't buy anything yet that's why I've gone past.
[Phil:] Seven. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
[Gary:] And he's on the racetrack!
[Shelly:] Oh God! I've gotta go all the way round to get a diploma and all the way round there!
[Phil:] And he's doing us here boy! The girl! On the te
[Julie:] No! They stru, he does himself.
[Gary:] Oh yeah!
[Julie:] What number?
[Gary:] A number nine!
[Julie:] Nine.
[Gary:] Come on baby!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Gary:] Eight.
[Shelly:] Eight. [LAUGHTER] You should of gone for eight Phil []!
[Gary:] What's he gone for?
[Shelly:] Nine.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Nine []!
[Shelly:] And somebody's on
[Julie:] Who's awake?
[Gary:] Probably Vicki
[Shelly:] Twelve.
[Gary:] fell down.
[Phil:] Look at that! It's my twelve!
[Julie:] Where's the stuff then?
[Gary:] Put it in, put in th... [whispering] []. Sounds like Vicki.
[Phil:] [whispering] [].
[Gary:] [whispering] Don't touch it []! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] What are you two doing?
[Gary:] Can't do anything with that going can we?
[Shelly:] What are you stuffing in your, in your?
[Phil:] You.
[Shelly:] What? Take your slipper off!
[Gary:] I said we can't do anything with that.
[Phil:] It's on tape [LAUGHTER] innit? [LAUGHTER] What we're doing []!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Yeah, you're don't have to talk to make the money! I know how many things I've
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] He said we sho
[Shelly:] fucking got!
[Phil:] he said... she didn't realise the tape was on []!
[Gary:] Who is it?
[Phil:] Sh! Don't.
[Gary:] Who was it, Vicki?
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] [whispering] I don't think so [].
[Julie:] It's okay.
[Gary:] Put that back cos that's mine!
[Shelly:] Excuse me! No che, I'm gonna stay in here with him while... so
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] he don't fucking cheat!
[Phil:] That's the bags.
[Shelly:] Go to the toilet one at a time!
[Phil:] Must be.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] See... I'm not cheating!
[Shelly:] I'm next in the toilet!
[Phil:] Is she alright?
[Shelly:] Who?
[Phil:] Julie in there?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] What toilet?
[Shelly:] Not in the loo! No, she's
[Phil:] No, right.
[Shelly:] gone to see Vicki!
[Phil:] Just going to the toilet alright?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, I know you are []!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Shelly:] You can go up to the! [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Don't cheat Shelly!
[Shelly:] give diplomas [LAUGHTER] don't worry []!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Just under
[Phil:] Don't cheat!
[Shelly:] the table for a minute []!
[Gary:] That's cheating! Julie.
[Shelly:] ... How many for a divorce? [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [whispering] Is she asleep? What did she do, fall out of bed []? Dreaming?
[Julie:] Well she'd got all her.
[Gary:] Watch them Ju! They're cheating these two!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... If you and Philip were gonna cheat then you'd!
[Gary:] [cough]... Philip went... Philip said, shall I nick a ten thousand? Didn't realise the tape was on!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... She's got one of her cuddly toys! I don't know which one.
[Gary:] I give her... teddy
[Julie:] Oh!
[Gary:] bear.
[Julie:] Did you? Well that's what it is then.
[Gary:] Oh!
[Julie:] And it was on the floor but she was lying on the bottle. Lying on her bottle.
[Gary:] I didn't take her
[Julie:] So
[Gary:] bottle!
[Julie:] I did, I took her bottle back to her.
[Gary:] Oh course you did! She asked me to get her
[Phil:] Pass me five thousand!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] bottle []!
[Julie:] Oh God! There no toilet roll down here!
[Gary:] Oh my God! You been on the shit again!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No!
[Gary:] No splashing the pan!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I don't know wanna re-coat it! It was re-coated [LAUGHTER] last week! Pebble-dashed []!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Oh yeah! Len lend us one. Just finish this. Eight.
[Gary:] Six.
[Julie:] Can you now
[Gary:] What.
[Julie:] Can you pop down with one box tomorrow or Saturday?
[Gary:] What for?
[Julie:] Beryl's collecting up some toilet rolls from the up St Meringer for two P.... I've got two.
[Gary:] I'll phone you on Monday if you want? From work. He won't be coming till Tuesday.
[Julie:] Yeah alright.
[Gary:] If you want.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] I say, I wouldn't realise you see. Can you get us some toilet rolls... I put the last one in the bathroom or summit.
[Julie:] Well he said yesterday had we, we'd got enough and I thought we had.
[Gary:] Mhm.
[Julie:] But there's only two under there.
[Gary:] I shall use kitchen roll till he comes around then.
[Julie:] Well it's Vicki innit! Every time I go for a wee I en she comes with me and pulls a load off to bloody blow her nose!
[Gary:] Who's go is it? Mine innit?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Everybody ready?
[Julie:] Mm mm. Oh shit!
[Gary:] Shut the kitchen light out? Turn the se, turn the bloody kitchen
[Shelly:] Do you want the kitchen light on or not?
[Gary:] Turn it off. [LAUGHTER] Shut the kitchen light off []!
[Julie:] I put her on her back and she's gone back to sleep.
[Shelly:] So how much were they at the Swan's then?
[Gary:] Nothing.
[Julie:] Nothing!
[Shelly:] I had to a man with the stick earlier.
[Gary:] What's that? Yeah!
[Julie:] Oh I dunno what he's got in there!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's that? Collect hundred pound go in last night.
[Julie:] No! There's nine at bingo.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Which one's collected hundred pound on granddad's birthday?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Grandma's fu [], grandmother's funeral!
[Julie:] Inherit two hundred pound.
[Phil:] Oh!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four
[Gary:] Shall I give him the hundred? Is that my hundred Shel is it?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Didn't see you put it there.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Well I did []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Cos you're winning!
[Shelly:] Ah, I can buy now! Two, three, four, five, six. Ooh! Oh! Yes!
[Phil:] Yeah, I fancy that a lot really don't I?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Is that
[Julie:] No, I only go five thousand.
[Shelly:] Oh my coffee's, coffee's gone cold now!
[Julie:] Ooh God!
[Gary:] Six, sixty.
[Julie:] Six, no.
[Shelly:] Ha hoo hoo! Five thousand! Ooh!
[Julie:] Four.
[Gary:] Four.
[Julie:] Four. No! No!
[Gary:] Oh no, the other.
[Shelly:] Eight.
[Julie:] Eight. That'll do!
[Shelly:] Plus one half.
[Gary:] Not my go anyway!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] Give it back []! One, two, three, four, five, six
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Hundred times roll of both... [LAUGHTER] dice []!
[Phil:] About hundred thousand!
[Julie:] No!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Don't wind him up
[Phil:] Ah!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] []! Four.
[Shelly:] Four.
[Julie:] That's mine anyway!
[Gary:] Say no to me!
[Phil:] I'm round now I can buy can't I?
[Gary:] for me.
[Shelly:] Hundred.
[Phil:] Been round haven't I?
[Julie:] I give you a hundred back
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] And the other one's
[Phil:] I can buy now.
[Julie:] yeah, hang on a minute!
[Shelly:] No, you're only there!
[Phil:] No, I've been round once ain't
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Phil:] I know? So I can
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Phil:] make that.
[Gary:] Hang on!
[Shelly:] No, it's when you pass there!
[Phil:] Haven't I been round yet? I've been round!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] No []!
[Phil:] I can't, I can buy can't I?
[Shelly:] I it says on the bottom of this Phil!
[Julie:] Oh yeah, you were up here weren't you?
[Phil:] Can I buy it or not?
[Julie:] No, I am!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] What?
[Julie:] Er
[Phil:] I'll take it!
[Julie:] Erm
[Shelly:] Yeah but you're not in the middle!
[Julie:] You're not in the middle!
[Phil:] Ah! Near the.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I'm in the middle now.
[Julie:] Yeah, so I can buy that off him.
[Phil:] Oh yes!
[Shelly:] Yeah but I'm on my way up there in a minute [LAUGHTER] hopefully []!
[Phil:] Oh he's in middle class isn't he? Yes!
[Julie:] I can buy that off him if I
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah I know []!
[Julie:] want to. Er
[Phil:] I thought if you went up... and yo... and yo we, you went back down you could keep... your higher class.
[Shelly:] No.
[Julie:] No. You have to sell them all off. Er
[Phil:] Or
[Julie:] how much are they, five hundred?
[Gary:] That's a bit of cheating! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] How much is the value of this?
[Shelly:] Well it was a hundred... what one is it?
[Gary:] Give him two hundred of yours!
[Phil:] Cash.
[Shelly:] Can I?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah, but you can sell it me, see.
[Gary:] Cos she's in middle class.
[Julie:] Cos I'm in the
[Shelly:] Oh!
[Julie:] I've just had my own, own back. Erm... I'll give you hundred and fifty, no higher!
[Gary:] How much you'd paid again was it? Oh I paid you alimony
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] paid any []!
[Gary:] Paid your alimony haven't you?
[Julie:] This one Phil?
[Phil:] Well I
[Gary:] Haven't you?
[Phil:] ain't got nuffink!
[Gary:] You paid your alimony?
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Too right!
[Phil:] I think it's safer to be on the bottom. Six.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Well you can't go anywhere can
[Phil:] Six.
[Julie:] you?
[Phil:] Six.
[Shelly:] Time to start buying! One, two, three, four, five, six. on there. Got a greeny, with a
[Julie:] A six.
[Shelly:] six browny! [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six. Ooh I'll have one of them! Cos I can buy now.
[Gary:] That's your diploma innit?
[Julie:] Yeah! And a, I need one. I need all of, all of them at the moment.
[Phil:] Seven.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] One, two, three [], four, five, six, seven. I could buy anyway Shel! I've
[Shelly:] Why?
[Phil:] been round once. I've had hundred.
[Shelly:] Well you bought that one, they were selling them off.
[Julie:] Mm.
[Phil:] Oh! Ah! I'll try again.
[Julie:] Now you can buy. Can't he?
[Phil:] Stock Exchange.
[Shelly:] Mm.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Well come on make up your mind!
[Phil:] Are you trying to frighten me?
[Julie:] No yo
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Been elevens every time []!
[Julie:] Ooh!
[Shelly:] Ooh!!
[Julie:] Six. Lose that
[Gary:] Lose that quarter. Now go on!
[Julie:] Eight. Investment plus a half.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Mm!
[Phil:] Seven.
[Gary:] Well we took the next
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] gonna be.
[Phil:] around that stuff.
[Julie:] Same again.
[Shelly:] Nine.
[Julie:] Oh yeah, nine!
[Gary:] Investment plus equal amount.
[Shelly:] Plus equal amount.
[Gary:] Oh well!
[Julie:] My God!
[Shelly:] Oh shit! I've gone past it again!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Five, six... oh five hundred.
[Phil:] Right.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Need that just at the minute. Oh God only just!
[Phil:] innit?
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, ooh six! Ooh, here we go!
[Gary:] Julie's on the stock exchange!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh no!
[Phil:] Eighty five.
[Julie:] I don't like him sat there! Erm
[Phil:] I was on winning to don't I?
[Julie:] I know!
[Gary:] I tell you what this game's... doing quite well!
[Shelly:] Started about quarter
[Julie:] Three
[Shelly:] to nine didn't we?
[Julie:] three thousand
[Shelly:] Been going an hour.
[Julie:] I'm not having that!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Well I'll soon tell you.
[Phil:] Six.
[Julie:] No, go on.
[Gary:] Tape's still going again.
[Phil:] Back we go!
[Gary:] Looks like forty five minutes
[Julie:] That'll do, nine.
[Phil:] on one e, one side of tape haven't we? So we haven't been playing long
[Julie:] No, not yet
[Gary:] have we?
[Julie:] three thousand.
[Gary:] Right, is that all you get.
[Julie:] Yeah I only put in for three thousand, he got me a nine.
[Gary:] Yeah. Eight., one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
[Shelly:] D'you want some more wine?
[Gary:] Phillip, six.
[Julie:] No.
[Shelly:] No. D'you want one of them?
[Gary:] Can't buy it! I haven't been round once.
[Phil:] He ain't been round once.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I haven't got any
[Gary:] It's not funny anyway!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] It's fucking hilarious []!
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. I'll have that! Rose's Clothes
[Julie:] Ooh!
[Gary:] or whatever it is!
[Julie:] There are!
[Shelly:] Hundred pound!
[Julie:] A latest style suit!
[Gary:] And I'm going up next go! I can't say it yet can I? Yeah I can.
[Shelly:] You haven't got, you haven't got a diploma yet. Oh yes you have!
[Gary:] Yes I have! Yes I have!
[Julie:] Yeah you got enough.
[Gary:] Shut your face!
[Shelly:] Shit!
[Julie:] You gotta get round to there Gary!
[Gary:] Yeah, but I can say it now.
[Phil:] Yeah.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] So when I'm there I can go up straight away.
[Phil:] Ah, ha ha!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm Rosie!
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight! Yes!
[Gary:] [singing] Rosie and Ju, Rosie and Jim []!
[Shelly:] I'm going up next time! How much is that?
[Gary:] [singing] Rosie and Jim go round
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh, fifty pounds []!
[Gary:] . Rosie and Jim
[Shelly:] Oh! Oh it's a
[Gary:] Rosie and Jim! []
[Julie:] Oh I know! You aught to be here on bloody Monday with Vicki!
[Gary:] [singing] Dee dee dee, dee dee []
[Julie:] Oh it's my go innit?
[Gary:] D'you watch it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] No I don't watch
[Gary:] Rosie and Jim?
[Shelly:] those things []!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Ah ah ah []! One, two, oh shit!
[Shelly:] I just like Pingu. D'you used to watch Pingu?
[Gary:] You watch this... look!
[Shelly:] A little penguin!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... Hundred times roll
[Gary:] Why what's that on that?
[Julie:] of both dice. Four. Four
[Shelly:] Four hundred.
[Julie:] hundred.
[Gary:] Where's the name...?
[Shelly:] Bumps on at the moment innit?
[Gary:] One, two
[Julie:] Is it?
[Gary:] three, four
[Shelly:] [singing] Doo doo []!
[Gary:] five, six, seven, eight
[Shelly:] Oh how does the music go on Bump?
[Gary:] nine, ten.
[Shelly:] [singing] Bump, bump, bump, bump [].
[Julie:] Oh he's up!
[Gary:] Society weddings. [singing] He's in the high society []!
[Julie:] No!
[Shelly:] No!
[Phil:] No!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm in the low
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Cheeky shit!
[Phil:] I'm in there again...
[Shelly:] You ain't got nothing to sell have you Phil?
[Phil:] No.
[Gary:] Seven. One, two, three, four
[Phil:] I've gotta
[Gary:] five, six, seven.
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Gary:] [singing] This is the self preservation society []!
[Julie:] He's ain't half in't he?
[Shelly:] Ooh nine!
[Gary:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Plus equal
[Julie:] Plus equal amount.
[Gary:] Yeah go on then.
[Shelly:] Oh bollocks!
[Julie:] We're running out of these now!
[Gary:] Just see what it have been Shel. Let's just see what it have been.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No, I ain't even got
[Shelly:] You've got them all!
[Gary:] Shel just do whatever!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Oh eleven!
[Shelly:] Ooh! God!
[Phil:] Investment plus five times.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Ooh []!
[Gary:] Actually the first one isn't bad.
[Phil:] Should have gone for two shouldn't I? Go for number two usually. Eleven times investment. Five times the other investment.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Ooh racetrack!
[Julie:] Ooh racetrack!
[Phil:] Greed did get you a bit more! When you run out of money you know the one who's got the most... when you run out of money
[Gary:] Yeah, a hundred thousand... you go down to the bo, what's left
[Julie:] Ten thousand.
[Gary:] Ten thousand I'm getting carried away! Ten thousand... then... you get rid of all the
[Phil:] Yeah, but there can't be... there can't be enough o, enough erm... te ten thousands and this has to go right up to the top.
[Gary:] That's right.
[Julie:] No! So what we used to do, when we played with Michael
[Gary:] You count it up.
[Julie:] and Ken we used to write it down on a bit of paper... who had what and who owed what and
[Shelly:] I'll change that for a pink one. And I'll
[Gary:] Watch her, watch her Ju!
[Shelly:] One! Two! Three! Four! Five!
[Gary:] What's this for?
[Julie:] Racetrack.
[Gary:] Oh!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... Oh right! Now I'll go for number... eleven. Ooh ooh!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ten!
[Shelly:] Ah!
[Gary:] Bye bye money! [singing] Bye bye money []!
[Julie:] Oh shit!
[Shelly:] Oh balls!
[Gary:] [singing] Bye bye money doo doo doo doo []
[Julie:] I'm on the bloody black one!
[Shelly:] Cla one of these bugger's wrong innit? [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Nine. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. Oh I'll have one of them.
[Gary:] See, she's sneaking that if you
[Shelly:] Oh I did
[Gary:] look.
[Julie:] Five hundred pound.
[Shelly:] Did you get your two hundred?
[Gary:] No, you didn't give me my hu, no
[Julie:] Neither did I then!
[Gary:] whatever it is!
[Phil:] Nor did I!
[Julie:] You haven't passed it yet!
[Phil:] Yeah! I went passed once, I got to wedding so I
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Phil:] must have.
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Shelly:] Fucking hell! Dishing out the money now aren't I?
[Julie:] I'll have one of the green ones Shel?
[Shelly:] Ooh, one of mine?
[Julie:] Mm. No, green one.
[Shelly:] How much are they?
[Julie:] Five hundred. There you go!
[Shelly:] Ooh! A lovely video machine!
[Phil:] It's terrible being
[Julie:] Oh lovely! I'm gonna leave those on. Yeah.
[Shelly:] Yeah, bloody disgusting innit!
[Julie:] Well I got... about ten thousand.
[Gary:] Julie's got a few of them yellow ones now!
[Julie:] I haven't! Only got one.
[Shelly:] Oh, how the
[Gary:] Eight.
[Shelly:] hell did you get that one?
[Julie:] On that er
[Shelly:] Oh yeah!
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] bloody... lottery. I've won twice ain't I?
[Gary:] six
[Shelly:] Mm mm mm.
[Gary:] I don't think anybody's brought a brown one!
[Phil:] One.
[Gary:] Seven.
[Julie:] Seven.
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Oh Shit!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's that, taxes on what?
[Julie:] Pay ten
[Shelly:] Ten times
[Julie:] times roll of both dice.
[Gary:] That'll do me! Seventy, seventy pound. Well if you can't them to lose their money.
[Phil:] Two, three, four,fi oh gee! Didn't want a blue one! Is that it Shel?
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Phil:] Make sure it's all there!
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I will []!
[Julie:] Don't wanna do you
[Phil:] Is that
[Julie:] out of anything do you Ga?
[Phil:] Your go Shel.
[Julie:] No.
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. A night at bingo, ooh er missus! Ooh! Promise that'll be this Tuesday.
[Julie:] Eight. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Oh shit!
[Shelly:] Fifty times roll of one dice!
[Phil:] Fives... five fives are twenty five, two thousand
[Julie:] Two hundred an
[Phil:] five.
[Julie:] Two hundred and fifty!
[Shelly:] Two hundred and fifty!
[Phil:] Two hundred and fifty.
[Gary:] Oh! Still not there Shel!
[Julie:] Nice try Phil!
[Shelly:] Aye?
[Julie:] Ten
[Gary:] Still not there.
[Julie:] three, four, Who bought
[Phil:] Seven.
[Julie:] mine?
[Shelly:] Ten off you.
[Phil:] One, two, three
[Julie:] There you go.
[Phil:] four, five, six.
[Gary:] Five.
[Shelly:] Six, seven.
[Gary:] Oh I might be with my change.
[Phil:] A thousand Shel.
[Shelly:] Then that's going the... bank.
[Phil:] Shel? A thousand!
[Shelly:] Give us a chance!
[Gary:] I might be with my change. How many is it?
[Phil:] And I'll had three hundred on
[Shelly:] I got ten there.
[Phil:] the racecourse.
[Gary:] Well I might be with my cha
[Phil:] On an eight. Okay?
[Julie:] He's going
[Phil:] Yeah, that's it.
[Julie:] three hundred on the race track for an eight.
[Phil:] Seven.
[Shelly:] Seven.
[Phil:] Ooh that's it! Thirty seven.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I was watching! What was, what was that about twe
[Julie:] No,tha thrown that one.
[Phil:] Dee dee dee dee!
[Julie:] Seven. That's two sevens Phil.
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Cor! Bloody hell! That one's... forty, twenty and twenty one!
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Unlucky!
[Phil:] Well he's got eight so many other times so I thought I'd try it!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Six.
[Gary:] !
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six.
[Shelly:] When you pass
[Gary:] I was going up anyway, I said
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Gary:] didn't I?
[Shelly:] So am I.
[Julie:] You gotta get there yet Ga!
[Shelly:] Yeah, that'll do me! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, it's that.
[Gary:] Oh well that can go on the straight on the
[Shelly:] Right, so I gotta be, er ah, I can't come off can I?
[Julie:] No. So
[Shelly:] So you owe me?
[Julie:] can't we?
[Shelly:] twenty quid... and the bank owes me twenty quid.
[Julie:] Five. Do I collect my thousand this time? One, two, three
[Gary:] Of course.
[Julie:] four, yes! And I'm on the racetrack!
[Shelly:] Straight on?
[Julie:] Yep!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] That'll do! We'll we'll stick with that!
[Phil:] Go on then. Stand up.
[Shelly:] Aye?
[Julie:] Seven. I know how many's there! I'm!
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah. You keep saying! I'm a.
[Shelly:] Ten.
[Gary:] I just said... you were losing up there.
[Julie:] Pi picking up a one. So
[Phil:] That's six.
[Julie:] six thousand.
[Phil:] Six thousand Shel.
[Gary:] Well done Ju! I wouldn't nick them! Don't look like that!
[Shelly:] Aye, we didn't see that!
[Julie:] Three.
[Phil:] Eight.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] He did.
[Gary:] No we didn't, I was watching you.
[Phil:] One, two, three
[Shelly:] Oh yeah?
[Phil:] four, five, six
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] seven, eight.
[Shelly:] Phil would soon tell me.
[Gary:] I've go I've gotta watch
[Julie:] You jammy sod he's up in high class!
[Gary:] He's not, he's not over
[Shelly:] Any
[Gary:] the top Ju!
[Julie:] You bastard!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You sod off []!
[Shelly:] Got anything to sell?
[Phil:] Nope!
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You've haven't got any, hardly got any money []!
[Gary:] one, two, three.
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I was going up weren't I?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah.
[Gary:] Sh! Don't matter. So I gotta give these back now ain't I?
[Julie:] I don't know how you're gonna
[Shelly:] Julie's gotta pay four hundred and Phil's gotta
[Gary:] Julie's gotta give me
[Shelly:] pay for one.
[Gary:] a hundred
[Julie:] How much?
[Shelly:] Twenty.
[Julie:] Twenty.
[Gary:] And Phi, Phil's gotta give me a hundred.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Twenty [].
[Gary:] And nobody's gonna give me nothing for that are they?
[Julie:] Alright. Thank you very much.
[Gary:] I'll get it Phil! Don't worry!
[Phil:] Oh you little bastard!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] It's alright mate!
[Shelly:] Seven.
[Gary:] Don't worry about it!
[Shelly:] Shit!
[Gary:] Plenty of time! Plenty of time!
[Phil:] Julie's putting nothing in!
[Shelly:] One, two
[Julie:] Oh no!
[Shelly:] three, four, five, seven, oh! It's fucking got up there now sell off all my...! Seven hundred.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I think Shel's got down to the beginning again!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You'll be back down there in a minute!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I bloody will! I'm still down
[Gary:] He
[Julie:] here at the moment!
[Gary:] he he he will be.
[Shelly:] You'll get a seven!
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell, eleven! One, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven. Er, oh I'll have one of them!
[Shelly:] Oh good! Five hundred, that's alright. Thank you.
[Gary:] darling!
[Julie:] There you go!
[Gary:] Land on one
[Julie:] Mine.
[Gary:] of mine for a change!
[Shelly:] Oh how about bloody
[Gary:] You never land on any of mine! I'm skint!
[Julie:] You know
[Shelly:] Yeah.
[Julie:] never used to go up. I'm going up next time.
[Gary:] Six.
[Julie:] When I get past there.
[Shelly:] But, yeah.
[Julie:] Right Phil!
[Shelly:] we should still be up! We should have won by now!
[Julie:] Phil you'll be in the higher class.
[Shelly:] Oh I can see that!
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, [LAUGHTER] One, two []
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]... That one?
[Shelly:] Yeah, I'm just gonna keep going till I land on the wedding.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
[Julie:] It was me that went down first weren't it?
[Shelly:] Go back down.
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah []!
[Julie:] Eight.
[Gary:] No, I went from there
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] []!
[Gary:] to there... to fucking there!
[Julie:] Yeah, well that don't make, that don't make any difference cos I'm going up
[Gary:] Your not!
[Julie:] and I'm selling these off then!
[Gary:] I was up there, I was looking forward to my first ten thousand, I went from there to there, to fucking
[Julie:] Gary!
[Gary:] there!
[Phil:] It's only Gary innit?
[Gary:] What?
[Julie:] It's only Gary that wants these. I've got all
[Gary:] What?
[Julie:] these three.
[Gary:] All three? Then I'll have the lot!
[Julie:] Right! Now then, I'd get two hundred for them
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] I wouldn't get anything for that.
[Gary:] Mm.
[Julie:] So you can have the whole lot for four hundred.
[Gary:] You got a deal! Cos I love you!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You bloody creep []!
[Phil:] Getting him up there quick! Right?
[Shelly:] Yeah, he can go up here to fucking win that!
[Gary:] Give me one, give me hundred back! Give me hundred back!
[Julie:] Oh yeah! So he can!
[Gary:] Give me hundred back!
[Julie:] I ain't got hundred! Mi, I've only got five hundreds.
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'll let you off then! I'll gi you the five hundred pound.
[Julie:] I owe you hundred then.
[Shelly:] Yeah, cos all he needs to buy is two of them and he's won!
[Gary:] I'm going up next go.
[Julie:] He'll probably go straight back down!
[Gary:] Thanks a bunch!
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] He's still gotta go all the way round the next one.
[Phil:] Yep!
[Gary:] Well it don't matter anyway!
[Phil:] Ten thousand.
[Gary:] But I'm just letting everybody know I'm going u, I'm going up next time, alright? We'll probably find out none of this have come out [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] What does she want?
[Shelly:] another one
[Gary:] Oh what a shame bye bye money, put it in the bank
[Shelly:] Yes
[Gary:] it's only
[Shelly:] five to one, ooh we haven't got five of these left I don't think, one, two, three, four, five, ooh and there
[Phil:] jJust in a minute you'll
[Shelly:] ooh
[Phil:] have to get me that big yellow
[Shelly:] I've got fifteen
[Gary:] if I got ten before I get to the top I've won haven't I? Because I'm there and you're not, your money doesn't count then
[Shelly:] Well if everybody wants to, I'll, I'll give everybody one of these and I'll go up to the top [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Wait till I get it
[Shelly:] It's a good try innit?
[Phil:] Cor, nine
[Gary:] In't that right? Is that right I've won?
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Gary:] Not that I'm being nasty
[Shelly:] not the first time round
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Well that's right innit?
[Julie:] Six
[Gary:] Is that right or wrong?
[Julie:] one, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] I go to the top, I win if I got, if I got
[Shelly:] Yeah, but you've got to buy two of these first
[Gary:] but I've got to make sure that I've got ten in't I first?
[Phil:] But your first time round
[Shelly:] and you've got to have two of these for
[Gary:] Yeah, eight
[Shelly:] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] how many do I need? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven ooh, ah shit
[Phil:] Ooh close
[Shelly:] now I've got to go all the way round again, so no good buying nothing it's not worth it is it?
[Phil:] Ten, ooh
[Shelly:] Keep going till I land on it
[Phil:] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten can I have my er
[Shelly:] Ooh last one
[Phil:] get that yellow
[Julie:] Eight
[Phil:] bit of paper
[Gary:] That yellow pad there Shell
[Phil:] and what happened, the pen was around somewhere
[Gary:] Phil had the pen, Phil get the pen and will you add it up will you cheque book, by your cheque book weren't it?
[Julie:] Buy that one
[Gary:] Oh that's one of mine
[Julie:] no I won't
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] The only ones you want to buy is the green and the black cos they're in the bank
[Julie:] I don't want I don't want to buy yet
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] that's all I've got
[Shelly:] I know
[Julie:] I can't
[Gary:] And you can't get any more money
[Julie:] you need it don't you, you got, you will, what you're thinking about based on that
[Gary:] you're fucking out
[Julie:] you cunt
[Gary:] I missed a divorce anyway so I'm alright
[Julie:] Can you get the pen, bastard [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] got a pen?
[Gary:] What do you want a pen for? you had it
[Shelly:] Cos there ain't any of the ten thousands left
[Julie:] Cos you had it
[Phil:] And you're going up as well ain't you?
[Gary:] And I'm going up as well, but I'm
[Julie:] Where'd I put the pen?
[Shelly:] You're on
[Gary:] but I'm going race track as well so I'm on the race
[Phil:] It's on the book weren't it?
[Gary:] I'm on the race track
[Phil:] On Auto Trader
[Gary:] I'm on the race track now... I throw the dice myself here don't I? I go one, right, I hadn't said a number yet
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I keep doing that it's all right, I have you got the pen?
[Shelly:] It's on there Phil
[Gary:] I've got to stick with eight ain't I, cos eight's got to come again six
[Shelly:] Six
[Gary:] how many? Five
[Shelly:] five...
[Gary:] ten
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] ooh the bank nearly then
[Gary:] something up top, so I'm selling
[Shelly:] Back on the bottom
[Gary:] so I'm selling these come on, who wants these?
[Phil:] Oh nobody, cos no one 's in the middle
[Shelly:] Yeah we are, me and Phil are
[Gary:] Where Shell?
[Shelly:] Oh no we're not
[Phil:] No we're passed
[Shelly:] we're not in the middle
[Gary:] You in the middle?
[Shelly:] No
[Gary:] Oh aye so he's, he's back down there, is green owes me five hundred
[Phil:] The bank
[Julie:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Oh shit yeah
[Phil:] that's olives
[Gary:] that's green it's five hundred
[Julie:] Not er, hundred, not five hundred
[Shelly:] Not five hundred, it's only a hundred innit?
[Phil:] What?
[Shelly:] nice try Gary but it didn't work
[speaker004:] ...
[Gary:] Who's go? Shell's go?
[Shelly:] Mine I've got two, I've gone from one side of the wagon to the other
[Julie:] I keep getting there
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven
[Phil:] You get the last one again, ha
[Shelly:] Oh here we go
[Gary:] Who's got the pad?
[Shelly:] Me
[Phil:] She has
[Gary:] Keep count then
[Julie:] Five, one, two, three, four
[Shelly:] Don't have to at the moment... don't forget to call straight away
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, one, two, three I'll have that one
[Shelly:] You would of been divorced if you'd been in the middle
[Gary:] I can't buy, I can't buy yet
[Shelly:] Oh a couple of twelves get me right the way round, one, two, three, four, five, six, one, two six, one, two, three, four, five, six, ooh, I'll have one of them... oh that's not mine you could of
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Who keeps puffing smoke
[Julie:] it's from here
[Phil:] Three thousand pounds, ooh
[Shelly:] One, two, three
[Phil:] oh it's only three of them little yellow ones
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] golden ones
[Julie:] Six
[Gary:] Better than a kick in the teeth innit?
[Shelly:] Ooh what's this, this is a
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six
[Shelly:] ooh a Louis the X V commode
[Gary:] oh lend me ten thousand
[Shelly:] Oh there's none of, oh yeah I can do these now can't I?
[Gary:] Yeah, do them with them can't you?
[Phil:] Yeah until we haven't got any
[Gary:] Right, now I've got to throw the dice
[Shelly:] We've got quite a few to go
[Phil:] A thousand times rolling those dice
[Shelly:] Ooh seven thousand
[Julie:] Give me two thousand, three thousand, give me two
[Shelly:] That's what we like Phil see cos that means you keep all the pink ones back
[Julie:] five, six, seven, eight, one, two, three, four, five, one, two, oh shit can you ten thousand
[Shelly:] Ah
[Phil:] Ah
[Shelly:] you sure you don't want me to keep it?
[Phil:] three thousand
[Julie:] money comes to money I say
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] That's what Pam says every time your mother wins at bingo
[Julie:] It happened to her
[Shelly:] and every, it's always money goes to money she was born with a silver spoon, I was born with a wooden spoon...
[Phil:] Oh I've got to miss a go anyway haven't I? Oh
[Gary:] Yes, don't cheat
[Phil:] I'm being honest
[Shelly:] Seven
[Gary:] That make's a change
[Phil:] Whoops I was on there wasn't I? One, two, three, four, five, six, ooh, here we go
[Shelly:] Will it be a little yellow one?
[Phil:] Don't know
[Gary:] Got a few of them though
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] she must have a few of them, she's been up there a while
[Shelly:] What?
[Phil:] I've got three now, I've only got three
[Shelly:] Only
[Gary:] And a few fives, a few fives, look at all them fives
[Julie:] God she
[Shelly:] no, cos Phil's gonna erm
[Phil:] Seven the game's over
[Gary:] What number you going for?
[Shelly:] I'm not, it's the stock exchange
[Gary:] Of course it is
[Shelly:] That'll do
[Phil:] One, two, five
[Gary:] That fifteen, I, I keep on doing eight
[Shelly:] Oops sorry
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, might go on it
[Julie:] Gary, I'll kick your arse
[Shelly:] Oh he's on the stock exchange [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] That's right you want
[Julie:] five there...
[Phil:] Just think, down one each side
[Gary:] Nine
[Shelly:] Nine
[Phil:] Nine, that's equal amount
[Gary:] Er what?
[Phil:] you're investing
[Gary:] Yeah, go on then
[Shelly:] What would the last number of been?... Ten, ha plus two times
[Phil:] It's sure to come... come on then Gal
[Shelly:] Shit Phil did I turn the fire off?
[Phil:] Eh? Haven't got any credit
[Shelly:] Phil did I turn that the fire off at home?
[Gary:] Soon find out when you get home won't you? If the lights are still on
[Shelly:] Yeah, but did I turn the bars off?
[Gary:] Not bad about it
[Shelly:] The fucking dog'll sizzle up
[Gary:] Well the dog'll sizzle up, the dog taken it over will he
[Julie:] Seven
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Gary:] Not gonna buy anything?
[Phil:] what do I need?
[Shelly:] This stuff I'm going round and I'm gonna get
[Phil:] I need a, I need another thingybob, oh shit
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] smiling at, oh four, that's how I go, right
[Julie:] You were saying you need another what in a minute?
[Phil:] a thousand times oh, shit, I'd better do that first oh
[Julie:] ah, no, you're there, you're there, you are on stock exchange, is she?
[Phil:] Yeah I was then I had three, yeah, good
[Shelly:] Oh
[Phil:] I was just about to get rid of that
[Julie:] Oh shucks
[Gary:] Six, one, two, three, four, five, six, I'll buy that one
[Shelly:] Ooh
[Gary:] yeah
[Shelly:] ooh
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I say you wouldn't buy mine
[Gary:] No I won't buy it
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] ...
[Gary:] Six, one, two, three, four, five
[Phil:] Oh I thought you were going down then Gary...
[Shelly:] Ten, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten... ten, oh, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten and I've already got one of them, thank you
[Phil:] Is the iron off?
[Gary:] five, one, two, three, four, missed the fucking taxes thank Christ for that
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] six, one, two, three, four, five, six
[Shelly:] Yeah, you seemed to gain your ten thousand don't you, then you lose it [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] three there
[Phil:] Oh one, two, three, two hundred quid, wow... six
[Gary:] put
[Phil:] one, two, three, four, five, six
[Shelly:] Six, now I'll have one of them, that's yours Phil cos I need another one
[Julie:] Do I have to sell it?
[Shelly:] Yeah, but he was a bastard to you wasn't he?
[Gary:] Of course you do
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, you didn't want one of mine did you?
[Gary:] No, nor mine, you should of
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... There you go
[Julie:] Three thousand
[Phil:] Yes I know, this' ll make me sick
[Shelly:] Go at it with a fast engine
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] Yeah [LAUGHTER] go round about
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
[Julie:] You want to buy me out then?
[Gary:] Yeah
[Phil:] He needs his own [LAUGHTER]...
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, I'll buy that one then
[Gary:] No you can't, cos you haven't been round
[Shelly:] You haven't been round yet
[Julie:] I have
[Gary:] that's your first time of going round, no
[Julie:] I have
[Gary:] you haven't
[Julie:] I've been round once, of course I've been round once you pratt
[Gary:] No you haven't, you only collected a thousand
[Julie:] The second one, yeah
[Gary:] that's your first time round, we've only been round twice
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] What? I've been round twice ain't I?
[Phil:] No not yet
[Julie:] On that pokey little, er I think I have you know I think you find that I have, I have
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five
[Julie:] I've been on stock exchange at least once
[Phil:] oh race track, ooh
[Julie:] I think you'll find that I have, tell you the truth I think you'll find that I have
[Phil:] two thousand
[Julie:] but no I don't, I don't give a fuck
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] erm
[Julie:] I've been round there twice because I've swiped this, one I've been round there
[Phil:] number eleven again
[Julie:] cos I said to you last time, I said fucking, that was close weren't it?
[Gary:] No that was the first time round
[Julie:] Was it?
[Shelly:] Ten... [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Put it in the bank
[Shelly:] This bank's getting quite healthy here
[Gary:] it's is good innit? The way you've got haven't you got nine
[Phil:] Nine
[Gary:] fifteen haven't you?
[Phil:] one, two, three, four something like that five, I don't need them any more
[Gary:] Cos you had that seven didn't you?
[Phil:] it's just my money I need...
[Gary:] Seven one, two, three, four, five, six, seven...
[Phil:] Don't you want Aunty Pam's fur coat?
[Shelly:] Do you want one of them Phil?
[Julie:] No I keep on landing on that one
[Gary:] one, two, three, four
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm on the stock exchange
[Shelly:] Oh hell
[Phil:] Mm, mm
[Julie:] Borrow that
[Shelly:] Oh shit... number one spin time, five lose half of it
[Julie:] Get the, that's it
[Shelly:] ooh [LAUGHTER] alright oh shit yes it did
[Gary:] does you too that's one plus two times...
[Phil:] Twenty pound
[Shelly:] What was it last time then? Ooh
[Phil:] mm
[Shelly:] ooh a shit, that's what I need, does, does that count as my go?
[Julie:] No
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] you can't go up just like that
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five
[Phil:] Another hundred pound
[Shelly:] Bloody hundred
[Julie:] Oh that's mine as well innit?
[Phil:] Eleven... one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven can I have ten thousand
[Gary:] Credit due
[Phil:] please Shell? I haven't got any credit
[Gary:] twelve, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, can I have my...
[Julie:] Can I have mine as well please?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I like to use the money
[Julie:] But you must be nearly out, two hundred thousand
[Gary:] Who?
[Phil:] ten, twenty, thirty, forty, forty five, fifty, fifty five, sixty, sixty five, seventy, seventy five, eighty, eighty one, eighty two, eighty three, eighty four, eighty five, eighty six
[Julie:] She's been up there a long time hasn't she?
[Phil:] eighty seven
[Shelly:] I've got fifteen of them
[Phil:] eighty eight
[Julie:] She's been up there quite a long time hasn't she?
[Phil:] eighty nine thousand, I need another go round and another thousand pound and I've won because I've got me two thingybobs
[Shelly:] I've got fifteen of them here and I'm still in the bloody bottom class
[Gary:] And your go, your
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] My go already?
[Phil:] Gary must of got more than me though
[Julie:] No you've just had your go it's Julie's go
[Shelly:] You've got a lot more than me, but
[Julie:] Not a lot
[Shelly:] Where are you then, yeah, but, you're up in the high
[Gary:] But, he, he ain't bought anything
[Phil:] He can start buying now
[Gary:] he ain't bought all his
[Shelly:] Yeah, but, so with that all he only needs, he only needs to get
[Phil:] What are you doing with a diploma?
[Gary:] he ain't bought any yet he just should of had that one
[Phil:] You don't need a diploma
[Gary:] but er pay back, straight back in the bank cos nobody's in that one
[Julie:] It's the diploma I want
[Phil:] you only, you only need to buy two
[Gary:] You don't need the diploma at the top
[Phil:] You need one
[Gary:] gotta buy two after you st, start going round
[Phil:] so if
[Shelly:] No
[Phil:] you've been round once
[Gary:] I've been round twice but nobody believes me
[Phil:] if you manage to buy two before I get eleven thousand pounds
[Julie:] Yeah I've been round twice, but it doesn't matter
[Gary:] a hundred thousand yeah, yeah yeah you want eleven thousand
[Phil:] yeah if you manage to buy two things before I make eleven thousand you've beat me.
[Gary:] I know, I've been round twice that's what I'm trying to say
[Shelly:] Seven
[Gary:] Oh I would of won by now, but somebody cheated
[Shelly:] one, two, three, four five, six, seven oh shit me and my big mouth
[Gary:] I've just gotta say Shelly
[Shelly:] So that's the ten thousand gone
[Gary:] can you handle a lot of money?
[Shelly:] I need twenty one thousand
[Gary:] But I'm the winner
[Shelly:] Now, hang on
[Gary:] I've only gotta go back down
[Shelly:] hang on
[Gary:] again haven't I?
[Shelly:] Er
[Gary:] Oh pissed off then
[Shelly:] where are one, we're up in the high aren't we? yeah, but Gary needs them... you, you need the green one and Gary needs both so
[Julie:] My blue one's there
[speaker004:] Just give Phil's back and give the bank's back [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Just give me, give me a bill for that
[Shelly:] No because that means you've won
[Phil:] No cos like, no I ain't
[Julie:] Phil's got a long way to go actually [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Give me, give me a bill for that
[Julie:] So do you want the green man Phil?
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] Now it was three thousand weren't it? How much did the bank give me?
[Shelly:] Five hundred
[Julie:] Five hundred you can have it for fifteen hundred
[Phil:] Go on then and I'll have mine back for five hundred, yeah...
[Julie:] Yeah cos you've had a
[Phil:] so two thousand for the lot
[Julie:] Yeah, cos you've still only got one then haven't you? And you'll want that, right, thank you very much
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] and I'm back in it?
[Shelly:] It's gone your fireworks in it?
[Julie:] Yeah I see if you had it Gary you would of won
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven race course
[Julie:] Race track
[Phil:] fuck this, ah shit I'm at the race course
[speaker004:] You can just say that
[Julie:] Yeah, but you're not stupid enough to sell them to me would you?
[speaker004:] Cor I'm so fucking poor
[Shelly:] No
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ten
[Gary:] Three
[speaker004:] three, seven
[Phil:] Put it in the bank
[Gary:] Give it to me
[Julie:] seven
[Gary:] give it to me then Shell, give it to me, have I had mine?
[Julie:] Oh so I'm bloody back down again
[Shelly:] Yeah you've had yours
[Gary:] Four, one, two, three, four
[Julie:] Wait a minute that's mine
[Gary:] I've, I've oh shit that's one of my own
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I've never had one of my own before...
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six, oh
[Julie:] I've got to go all the bloody way round before I can buy anything. Six, one, two, three, four, five, six, oh shit [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] This is better than nine, one, two, three, four, five, six [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] seven, eight, nine, I've put, erm yeah I, er, no, I can buy that one can't I?
[Julie:] Mm, mm
[Shelly:] Mm, mm
[Phil:] Yeah, I'll buy that one
[Julie:] Why don't you use three of the other ones?
[Phil:] Yeah, I'll use three thousand
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] How many more do you need Phil?
[Phil:] I've got about forty five thousand
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] fifty thousand I've got... oh shit, roll again
[Julie:] Oh, one, two, three, four
[Phil:] at least I know I haven't got to worry about divorce
[Julie:] five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten
[Gary:] Do I get a card?
[Phil:] at least I know I haven't got to worry about a divorce
[Julie:] No not this time though oh yeah, yeah
[Phil:] What's that?...
[Julie:] Seven, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven Ascot fruit stake, ticket on a horse [reading] roll a double and you win a thousand pounds, roll an even and you win two hundred, roll an odd and you []
[Phil:] We haven't landed on that yet have we?
[Julie:] No
[Shelly:] Oh shit you've won a thousand pounds
[Julie:] even, oh yeah double... that's the way to do it
[Shelly:] no thank you or nothing
[Julie:] Thank you very much [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm alright, I'm safe
[Julie:] Gal
[Gary:] up there
[Julie:] you can win
[Gary:] Yeah, but you wouldn't do it would you? Are you gonna be nasty to us?
[Julie:] Well we could we could start all over again then couldn't we?
[Gary:] Why we've got it, yeah, whatever, yeah whatever going you've got in there
[Shelly:] You don't have to sell them back to him
[Julie:] he's gonna win anyway
[Shelly:] But why?
[Gary:] Not yet
[Julie:] in two rounds
[Gary:] Not yet I'm not
[Shelly:] No
[Julie:] right
[Shelly:] I could get up there before he buys
[Julie:] alright
[Shelly:] anything [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Alright
[Shelly:] Not likely, but I might, I need one, two, three, four
[Julie:] it's up to you
[Shelly:] five, six, seven, eight
[Julie:] if you want to finish it, depends if you want to finish it
[Shelly:] How many tens of boxes have you got?
[Julie:] Like that
[Gary:] I think I could just do it
[Shelly:] Sex, that sex maniac card game
[Julie:] Yeah, but you see he's still gotta find two
[Gary:] Yeah
[Julie:] so that's gonna cost him six thousand of what he's got
[Gary:] yeah I know...
[Phil:] So how much you got? [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm not quite sure I'm counting actually
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'd say I've got ten, plus my bits... that's why I've got to stay up here a bit longer really innit?
[Julie:] Erm, where am I, I'm on there, so what is it a thousand, do you want to pay my bill?
[Gary:] I've won then haven't I?
[Julie:] Yeah, then we start the game again don't we? What about a game of that sex maniac
[Gary:] No I'm not playing sex maniac so
[Shelly:] Mother bought that for me for Chris for us for Christmas and you've never played it?
[Gary:] Do you want to?
[Julie:] I don't mind
[Gary:] Do you want to finish it or not? No you see I, see how I go for a minute
[Julie:] Right, then we'll wait a bit longer
[Shelly:] So you're gonna pay his bill for those? For that one?
[Gary:] No I don't wanna do it cos I wanna go up there, I wanna win
[Julie:] Right sorry
[Shelly:] Phillip you dickhead
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm not being nasty I'll give him the money, but
[Shelly:] I was on there
[Gary:] I just didn't want to fill that, I wanna win fair and square I wanna win through, somebody give me his cards
[Phil:] Five hundred each one
[Julie:] One was a diploma I think
[Gary:] No, not up on the top one
[Julie:] no, was er black
[Gary:] not one I see no cos you've got that my last
[Shelly:] I did
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] That's what that diploma was, you know, paid me for it for that five hun, that's what it was
[Shelly:] Ah, I've been using me credit cards
[Gary:] for the art gallery
[Julie:] No you had two like that, er I hope we don't break down going home Phillip so I'll feel a twat walking around with your work socks
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] work socks and slippers
[Gary:] Stock exchange, I'm on nine
[Shelly:] You see he could lose the lot now Phil
[Phil:] No he won't, he's erm, erm
[Gary:] I'm not stupid
[Phil:] he's not collecting ten pounds
[Shelly:] You going to invest money?
[Gary:] What's that seven? No... no I or not
[Phil:] Yes
[Shelly:] That's a house
[Julie:] What's that?
[Gary:] Could of thrown them a bit, bit better than that, give them a fucking shake and I'll just
[Shelly:] Why couldn't I of kept the exam
[Gary:] cheating shit
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] bad loser that's your trouble
[Phil:] You don't want your ten thousand to pass under it
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] No I haven't had that yet my ten thousand for passing... er she takes her two hundred though from my ten thousand
[Shelly:] Right and I'll erm
[Gary:] you watch them
[Shelly:] race track
[Gary:] good on
[Shelly:] and I'll have one of these cos I
[Julie:] Ooh
[Shelly:] that one I've got [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] decisions, decisions
[Shelly:] Eleven, ha, oh shit that would mean twenty to one
[Gary:] That was close weren't it?
[Shelly:] oh fucking hell
[Gary:] Cor that was even closer weren't it?
[Shelly:] Oop, I moved your pen
[Phil:] what a shame put it in the bank
[Shelly:] Shit
[Julie:] Ten
[Phil:] Bye bye money, give me that in a minute will you?
[Gary:] I'll have it back in a minute
[Shelly:] Six, one, two, three, four, five, six, I ain't gone bloody round yet
[Gary:] Fifty one thousand I've got, more than that
[Julie:] I've got, let's see...
[Phil:] Eight
[Julie:] I haven't bought one up there yet I think
[Phil:] one, two, three
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] four, five, six
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] His face then
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, I'll buy that one whatever that may be, olives, olives, olives whoever she is
[Julie:] Olives that's Shell's
[Gary:] Is it?
[Julie:] Mm, mm
[Gary:] Do I need it?
[Julie:] Ooh diamonds for investment, ah give me the money for them
[Shelly:] yeah [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Piss off
[Phil:] Cos I think we're all in for a chance to getting it now, fifty thousand
[Shelly:] No we're not, cos he's only got to get another one... yes, yes, bastard, one, two, three, four, five
[Gary:] But I've got to go round to that again haven't I?
[Shelly:] Ah?
[Gary:] Haven't I go to go back round or not?
[Julie:] No
[Gary:] When I've got them all?
[Julie:] as soon as you've got the money you win
[Gary:] Soon as you've got them all
[Julie:] Mm
[Gary:] and the money, I win... she's close but she's on
[Shelly:] Eighty three thousand
[Gary:] Yeah, but you're one below me aren't you now?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] What a shame
[Shelly:] I've got fourteen and
[Julie:] Seven, one, two, three, four, five, six
[Gary:] What a shame, yeah, you in front of me, what a shame
[Julie:] seven
[Gary:] money wise, but you're not now are you? You, you, you're what you
[Julie:] I can't buy yet, I haven't passed the middle
[Gary:] call shit at the bottom aren't you?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Five, yeah, five, one, two, three, four, five
[speaker004:] I don't know why I didn't start buying them actually
[Shelly:] Oh you wanted that Phil
[Gary:] Could of got that Ascot thing, should apologize for making her take, give him a grand
[Julie:] Three
[Shelly:] Fifty pounds
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] What a shame
[Julie:] Oh, is that a one? You'll have to throw that one again cos nobody can tell, one, one, one, ah got it
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Give me, me a a yellow one
[speaker004:] My money
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [singing] Need a yellow one on top how I love you chicken pots []
[Shelly:] One, two, three, four, five,si oh god
[Julie:] Five, one, two, three, forty, five, [reading] put for winnings a hundred times roll of both dice []
[Gary:] Go on babe, go for it babe
[Julie:] Seven hundred
[Gary:] just dar
[Julie:] Darts you were gonna say weren't you?
[Phil:] seven
[Julie:] Thank you
[Phil:] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven
[Julie:] I never did much fucking look at that
[Gary:] five, taxes, one, two, three, four, five
[Julie:] I was saying I hope I don't go on five, hope I don't go on five, what do I fucking end up, on five seven thousand
[Shelly:] seven thousand
[Gary:] Cor can I afford it?
[Julie:] He can have light yellow ones
[Gary:] yeah, go on, cos I'll get them back in a minute won't I?
[Phil:] And you've still got another ten thousand I think
[Gary:] I think so, I think could just, no I haven't got the ten thousand I'm just under
[Shelly:] Ah, I've got to miss a go haven't I?
[Gary:] Could of lost that four didn't I
[Julie:] Ah yeah
[Gary:] in one go?
[Julie:] Oh no
[Phil:] So you haven't got a hundred thousand?
[Shelly:] Ten, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, oh golly here we go again
[Gary:] She has, she has but she's at the bottom, so if she give me three of hers I'd be alright, ha
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] [reading] Art show, fifty quid []
[Gary:] Jul I want three of yours, will you give me three of yours
[Julie:] Ah, sod off
[Gary:] Go on I'll make you a drink [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Eight, one, two, three, four
[Julie:] What you doing?
[Gary:] That's mine
[Shelly:] There are
[Gary:] Cor I shouldn't of been there I think I should of been the next one along
[Phil:] Three, four, five, six, seven, eight... I start mine again then six
[Gary:] Six, one, two, three, four, five, six
[Julie:] You've already got one... er one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Shelly:] Oh god... why can't there be a
[Julie:] seven, one, two, three, four, oh that's not
[Shelly:] you were on there
[Julie:] I was on there weren't I [LAUGHTER] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, I still can't bloody buy, and I need er thousand pounds please Shell
[Gary:] I can I don't know
[Julie:] I can't I haven't been bloody, yeah you have now, I've still gotta get to there yet before I can bloody buy anything
[Gary:] Eleven, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, I'll buy that one, er what's that?
[Julie:] Two hundred...
[Gary:] One, two... leave the stock exchange again, at last I won this
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Mm
[Shelly:] You gonna keep going?
[Gary:] Yeah, but fucking shake them Shell, don't cheat
[Julie:] Shit
[Shelly:] Oh bloody hell
[Gary:] I'll have that investment plan ten times
[Shelly:] That's ten times
[Julie:] That means he's gotta have
[Gary:] I've, I've won haven't I, I reckon?
[Julie:] a hundred thousand
[Gary:] All I've got to do now is
[Julie:] two, three, four, now five
[Shelly:] You haven't got enough have you?
[Julie:] six, seven, eight
[Shelly:] Oh yeah
[Julie:] nine, ten, why don't you just take the whole bank
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What and use
[Julie:] there you go
[Gary:] Think I should win then
[Shelly:] There are Phil that's yours
[Julie:] two ten, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten
[Gary:] Do you want to change it to fifteen hundred thousand?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Yeah, I'm only ten away from that
[Julie:] The only trouble is I wanted a seven, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven I haven't got
[Gary:] change it then
[Phil:] Ten
[Julie:] I want to buy in a minute
[Phil:] one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] a hundred times Phil...
[Gary:] Nice one mate a nice low one
[Julie:] Nine, nine hundred...
[Gary:] Six
[Phil:] I thought that was two then
[Gary:] six, one, two, three, four, five, I'll buy that one, then I've won
[Phil:] That's the game over then
[Julie:] Mm, yeah
[Gary:] cos I've got about, cos I can double it and treble it again I reckon, I can, cos I had fifteen
[Shelly:] Let's see if I can get the same then
[Gary:] I had fifteen before I had the ten Shell
[Julie:] No
[Gary:] Can I have fifteen, shall I carry on? Is that, how much you got there?
[Shelly:] You owe me three thousand first
[Gary:] What for?
[Shelly:] For this, cos you
[Gary:] Oh we, were gonna do all that first are we?
[Shelly:] No, you, I, you just bought that a new cos you've just landed on it
[Gary:] I've won
[Shelly:] Yeah I know you've won
[Gary:] Well then so I haven't got to give you nothing
[Shelly:] No, okay
[Julie:] I've come second
[Gary:] See, no, no you don't, you've got to count up
[Julie:] Well Shell's bank has come second
[Phil:] Yeah even though she's down on the bottom she's bound to of come second
[Shelly:] And me and Phil come
[Julie:] I've probably got more than you here
[Gary:] You haven't
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] I think, you can't, how can you
[Phil:] No, not if he's won
[Julie:] Oh no, he's just won
[Shelly:] He's just won on the houses ain't he?
[Gary:] Plus I already had that, plus I had another five I didn't tell you about, I had fifteen when you said you had fifteen, look, one... there's me first ten...
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER] Eighty, ninety []
[Julie:] I've only got two of them...
[Shelly:] Fifteen, sixteen
[Julie:] no eighty, eighty two fifty, erm, eighty two thousand and fif, no eighty thousand two hundred and fifty
[Shelly:] sixteen hundred thousand whatever it is
[Phil:] Four, five
[Shelly:] and a hundred and
[Phil:] six, seven, eight, nine
[Julie:] You had more or less double what I did didn't you?
[Phil:] ten
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] I've double, I've got twenty, I've got two plus one
[Shelly:] Right, put them into er
[Gary:] Two, three
[Julie:] Oh don't worry about putting them in piles, they only get chucked in the bottom of the box
[Gary:] four
[Shelly:] Oh do they?
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] hang on four, five, hang on I'm still going Shell
[Shelly:] aargh mine's disgusting as well
[Gary:] Five... six, seven, I say again seven, no I'm not, hang on... eight, I'm twenty eight, two hundred and eighty thousand there
[Shelly:] That would just about buy er, a three bedroomed house [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] It would would it?
[Julie:] Pity it isn't real really innit?
[Gary:] And a bit of change and a bit of change, a bit of pocket money
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] That's what Phil's got innit Phil?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You've got pocket money [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I, I have er fifty five thousand
[Gary:] That was a long game actually
[Julie:] Yes I've known
[Gary:] Don't want to start do we? What are we gonna do?
[Julie:] Gonna have a game of that?
[Phil:] Whatever, I'm gonna for a piss first
[Shelly:] What?
[Gary:] So you can cheat now, I don't care, yes so I had, I had fifty before I had the ten Shell
[Phil:] Have another game of this Shell?
[Shelly:] I don't mind
[Julie:] Show Gary how to I was just waiting
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] We didn't need that... put that back in there
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Oh there's the spastic spaky band here
[Julie:] Mm, mm
[Shelly:] never mind
[Julie:] now your, is your job alright now then Phil?
[Phil:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Yeah they've taken on extra staff
[Julie:] Are they?
[Phil:] I would think so anyway
[Shelly:] Yeah that he just, he asked Gary this morning if he was looking for a job
[Phil:] Asked Gary I would think they're taking on extra staff
[Shelly:] you've been told you've been training people ain't you?
[Phil:] I haven't been told that, but
[Julie:] What night?
[Phil:] yeah I would think so nights or days I would of thought... nothing's been really said about what's happening on that yet, not till the end of towards the end of the
[Shelly:] get offered the job first don't they?
[Phil:] Yeah they get offered the job, but, I told Gary if he puts his erm name forward, is that the Monopoly game?
[Shelly:] Mm
[Phil:] Could of had a game of Monopoly
[Julie:] His dad was saying that er Devon Desserts were looking for a fork lift driver
[Shelly:] have you got a fork lift?
[Phil:] Yeah, what sort of price is it? Wages is it?
[Shelly:] Dunno, he didn't say he just said they need a fork lift driver
[Phil:] Right, what's this game all about then?
[Shelly:] No I was thinking, will you be able to get time off in September?
[Gary:] We got Monopoly, you've got Monopoly ain't you? Did you bring Monopoly?
[Julie:] Yeah they have
[Shelly:] Is it September time you wanna go to Alton Towers?
[Gary:] Yeah, whatever, what, was
[Shelly:] You can get your holiday whenever you like can't you?
[Gary:] Yeah
[speaker004:] Why don't, you've got to be careful now haven't you? What ones have you booked? Do they still count now it's changed manager?
[Julie:] Yeah
[speaker004:] So what ones have you booked?
[Gary:] They can't stop you
[Phil:] I've got one booked in Oct September now
[Gary:] they can't stop you
[Phil:] I only want one day anyway, don't we? Cos we're only going away for a weekend then aren't we? A long weekend
[Julie:] Yes a long weekend
[speaker004:] Yeah, cos you'll want, you'll want
[Shelly:] You'll only need Monday night off won't you?
[Phil:] We're going, we're going on a Friday
[speaker004:] You'll only need the
[Julie:] Sunday night
[speaker004:] Sunday night off
[Phil:] we're going on the Friday and coming back on
[Shelly:] And the Monday especially if we're travelling back on the Monday
[Phil:] we're going on the Friday morning and coming back on this
[Julie:] No we can't go the Friday morning
[Phil:] Oh no
[Julie:] because of the kids
[Phil:] we'll go on the afternoon
[Julie:] because everybody else will be working
[Phil:] and we're, we're going on the Friday afternoon and coming back on the Monday afternoon.
[Shelly:] Yeah, so really driving back all that way you want Monday night off as well, you'll be knackered
[Phil:] Take Monday, take Fri take Monday off as well
[Julie:] Take Sunday and Monday off?
[Phil:] cos what we'll do we'll go out for a meal in the evening if we've got the money
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Why don't we just go to Keith's and let him do something? Cos they always cook for us anyway
[Phil:] No, eat out somewhere I think
[Julie:] Please yourself, we'll go with Terry and Kath
[Phil:] just B and B, no, well Dot'll probably down there, you know what she's like
[Julie:] Yeah, that's what I mean
[Phil:] Well if not, we'll go, eat out somewhere, it's just as cheap innit?
[Julie:] Well we won't have to go to
[Phil:] Look how much it cost us to go to that bloody restaurant with Chris and Keith
[Julie:] Yeah but look how far that
[Phil:] not Chris and Keith, Chris and Dot
[Julie:] Yeah it was
[Phil:] Keith, Chris and Dot, no Keith didn't go, you me, your dad
[Julie:] Oh that's right
[Phil:] Chris and Dot...
[Julie:] She'll be alright if I come
[Phil:] it was only about a mile down the road that place
[Julie:] How far?
[Phil:] [yawn] through the sticks, right what do you do with this game then?
[Gary:] Dunno, you don't win nothing
[Shelly:] Yes you do
[Julie:] You don't wanna go, you don't wanna go October do you? If your aunt asks you
[Phil:] [reading] To play shuffle the cards and place face down in the centre of the
[Shelly:] No cos
[Phil:] playing surface []
[Shelly:] it closes in October don't it? Cos we went there
[Phil:] Do you know
[Shelly:] the last week in September and it was the last week it was open, so you're better of going near the middle or I mean the beginning or
[Phil:] all we've got to do is phone
[Shelly:] the middle of September
[Phil:] we'll phone Chris and Keith and ask them the best time for us to go when the kids are not there, and she'll tell us
[Julie:] When do the kids, the kids go back to school the first week so if you go
[Shelly:] First week in September
[Julie:] the second week in September
[Phil:] Yeah, well you check on that, but I think that'll be okay won't it?
[Julie:] cos that's when we went weren't it? Second week
[Phil:] Yeah
[Gary:] What do you, what do you do here then?
[Julie:] Cards have got to go face down on the table
[Gary:] Yeah, shuffle, I read that, [reading] decide who goes first, the rest following in succ [] er whatever, [reading] start playing in a clockwise direction
[Julie:] You've gotta read one of the two questions on it and there's like
[Gary:] the player takes the first card and looks at it, if it is a question card ask the next player, one of the two questions []
[Julie:] Oh shit, they're, they're all together now
[Gary:] if the card is the instruction card, do you know what happens if you don't get it right then?...
[Julie:] Yeah, it just goes to the bottom of the pack, but erm there's numbers up there, you've gotta collect them to spell out sex maniac
[Shelly:] Mm, mm
[Gary:] so you've got to keep hold of that
[Julie:] Whoever spells out sex maniac, but if you have more than nine, every card
[Gary:] Ah so it's the first person who spells sex maniac
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] easy innit?
[Julie:] every time you get a question right you pick a card, but if you have more than, once you've got more than nine cards you've got to put one at the bottom of the pack again
[Gary:] Yeah, but you keep them all tidy won't you?
[Julie:] Yeah, I'm just trying to shuffle them to keep them together
[Gary:] You don't shuffle them like that you doughnut, how you shuffle cards with a pack of playing cards
[Julie:] Yeah they're a bit thicker than these
[Gary:] you stupid cow
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] moo
[Shelly:] Well no how much does it work out to to stay at Kit's twelve pound a night innit?
[Gary:] I dunno that, I mean you're gonna have to find out, find out if it's cheaper to stay at Keith's or not
[Shelly:] That's for both of you
[Julie:] I was gonna say it's ten pound a night each at that place we saw that was lovely weren't it?
[Gary:] Yeah, these, these are nice, these are nice
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] But you see we get
[Gary:] this is nice
[Julie:] they're all en suite rooms nice
[Gary:] Yeah and you've got your own showers
[Julie:] and some of them you've got your own toilet
[Gary:] got your own toilet, your own shower, now
[Julie:] two the double rooms got it, he's just had it all done ain't he?
[Gary:] Yeah, we'll have the double rooms, yeah? Cos they're nice aren't they?... How much?
[Julie:] He's alright he is
[Gary:] It's her uncle
[Julie:] they're alright
[Gary:] We'll eat, we'll eat in the dining room
[Julie:] you know the second week in Sept
[Gary:] we're not eating in the back room, he can get stuffed, we'll eat in the posh end for a change Jul, like we did last time
[Shelly:] If we go the second week in September, then that way we can
[Julie:] Well we won't when we get there, they don't do evening meal
[Phil:] Cor blimey that's tasty innit?
[Julie:] It, it has to be the first weekend does it?
[Phil:] Breakfast breakfast I think
[Julie:] Yeah
[Phil:] did you have it quiet when you went?
[Julie:] Oh yeah it was lovely, the only trouble was we had pigs outside the fucking window and we sat there with the bacon
[Phil:] Yeah, but did you have a big fry up?
[Shelly:] Yeah, but what you had
[Julie:] You had a choice of two cereals to start
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] plus a fresh squeezed orange
[Gary:] Help yourself to that
[Julie:] great big jug of orange juice weren't it between us there?
[Gary:] It was only us two there weren't it?
[Julie:] Yeah, because it should of been fifteen pounds a night and we got it for ten
[Gary:] Only about, only about a mile away from the fucking
[Phil:] That's right it was help yourself wasn't it?
[Julie:] It was in Norton itself, yeah and what else did you get? oh what about that place we stayed, we were gonna stay at? And the stairs were like that weren't they and I said oh no way am I staying, get pissed out your head and come down them stairs and mm
[Gary:] Said to you, cos oh well I thought about because we know the pubs and we can go to Queens or whatever for a few days
[Julie:] See open there were only, oh god remember that big posh place tripped over going in the door, we ran straight back out again
[Gary:] right here we go then
[Julie:] Yeah, right down the bottom
[Gary:] Right
[Julie:] there was a street light coming up the bloody
[Phil:] Who's going first then? We're going round this way, erm Gary's first I suppose then
[Julie:] Julie you're first
[speaker004:] No go on Shell
[Shelly:] So I've got to ask you the question? When Gary's stopped dying
[Gary:] I haven't stopped dying yet
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh here we go
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] so this is all gonna be on there innit?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] This is where I'm no, leave it on Gal
[Gary:] I am, I am, I was just looking at it
[Shelly:] killing herself I haven't even read it out yet
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You haven't even read it out yet
[Shelly:] you wait I've gotta ask Phil [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Does it go round like that until somebody answers it?
[Shelly:] No I only ask Julie
[Julie:] No, but the next one I'm gonna ask him
[Gary:] Oh
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] [reading] Who swung over the audience on a swing and [LAUGHTER] pissed all over them []? Was it A, Annie Sprinkle, B, Lulu, or C Cosi Fan Tutti? Pissed all over them []. A, B or C?
[Julie:] I dunno, er B [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] No, that one goes it was that erm Cosi Fan Tutti
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Never heard of it
[Shelly:] yeah, right Phil
[Julie:] Yeah it's easier than picking the pack up innit?
[Gary:] I dunno, I suppose you've got to pick the pack up ain't you?
[Shelly:] no just keep putting them on top and when you get to the bottom
[Julie:] Trust me to get
[Shelly:] that one, just start again
[Gary:] Clever aren't I?
[Shelly:] No you don't
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] because then that'll be at the bottom won't it?
[Julie:] That's right
[Shelly:] Fucking you clever, like hell you are
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I like this one [reading] what is the capital []
[Julie:] Hold on you've got a choice of two don't forget
[Shelly:] Oh
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] That's all we're gonna hear on this tape now
[Shelly:] Bloody hell [reading] what is a Wankel? [LAUGHTER] I can't say that without laughing, right []
[Julie:] What is a what?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] A wanker or wrangle?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] See him smiling [reading] what is a Wankel? A, a rotary car engine with a triangular rotor, B a do it yourself circumcision kit or C a cuddly toy []?
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] B
[Julie:] No A, a rotary car engine with a triangular rotor
[Gary:] I thought you would of known that
[Julie:] I thought you weren't gonna tell the answer
[speaker004:] I don't know
[Julie:] You didn't
[Shelly:] Yeah I did
[Julie:] did you?
[Shelly:] That Fan Tutti woman pissed all over the crowd
[Julie:] Oh was there, I thought you was
[speaker004:] Yeah
[Julie:] cos you remember it when your
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] If you get it right, you'll put it to one side yeah?
[Shelly:] Yeah you keep them
[Gary:] What I do? If I get this one right it comes to me?
[Shelly:] Yeah you keep the card
[Gary:] Right, give us a card then Phil
[Shelly:] you've got to spell out sex maniac
[Gary:] Give us the card then Phil
[Shelly:] that's [spelling] S E X M A N I C X, no C [] yeah
[Julie:] Yes
[Shelly:] sex maniac...
[Phil:] Right [reading] why did Victorians put skirtings around the table legs? A to help men get sexually aroused, B to make them... make them look like women's legs, C to prevent men getting sexy aroused? []...
[Gary:] C
[Shelly:] Oh, don't let other people see what letters you've got
[Phil:] That one was easier, it was orgasm or
[Gary:] Oh I would of got that one [LAUGHTER] I would of...
[Phil:] it's all the big words I look at
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] That's why you obviously don't like playing it then innit?
[Phil:] I like reading them...
[Julie:] Well he hasn't laughed yet
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] Who had a man obsession with a Mormon []?
[Julie:] With a what man?
[Gary:] A Mormon
[Julie:] A Mormon
[Gary:] it's er a religion innit? [reading] A, Madonna, B, Joyce McKinny or C Donny Osmond []?
[Julie:] C
[Phil:] It's not it's A
[Gary:] No it's B easy that it's a religion innit Mormon?
[Phil:] How are we supposed to
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [reading] Where did Marilyn Monroe say she kept her undies? In the ice box, in the President Kenn Kennedy's pocket, or in the post []?
[Julie:] A
[Phil:] B
[Shelly:] In an ice box
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I bet she had a cold cunt every morning
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Frozen orgasms
[Gary:] she did didn't she yeah
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] all your cards with the player to your right, so you've got to give me all your cards, and I've got none, so
[Shelly:] So you get that one
[Julie:] You lose a fucking card Gal, that's not fair is it?
[Gary:] Kick her in the head
[Phil:] I don't get a go?
[Gary:] Yeah
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] you can't do it that way, you just slide the pack out
[Julie:] So what now I get another Phil?
[Gary:] Cheat, no... yeah of course you do, must do mustn't you?
[Shelly:] No... no you must miss out on a go, oh it doesn't say, let him have another go then
[Gary:] It doesn't say?
[Shelly:] It doesn't say, no... wait for it [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Oh you're only allowed to have eight cards at one time
[Shelly:] [reading] Who said sex appeal []
[Gary:] so can you win it if you only have eight cards at one time? You can't have all ten?
[Julie:] Yeah, cos like if you've got three Ss or something then you put one at the bottom of the pack and keep the card if you've got an got to try and save up for them
[Gary:] What was that card again?
[Julie:] Swap, it was an instruction card
[Gary:] [reading] If this card is an instruction card it must be obeyed by the person asking the question, the instruction card is then placed at the bottom of the pack, instruction cards are ren randomly mixed with the question cards and can change directions of play, make you give to the player to the left one of your cards etcetera, if a player has more than [] it doesn't say.
[Julie:] No alright
[Gary:] Oh I just
[speaker004:] [reading] who says sex appeal is fifty percent what you've got and fifty percent what people think you've got? A, Sophia Loren, B, George Burns, or C, Terence Trent D'Arby?
[Julie:] C
[speaker004:] No
[Phil:] Sophia Loren
[Julie:] I ask, one night I sat there
[Gary:] Julie grab that won't you?
[Julie:] Alright
[Gary:] Grab it towards you whatever, like you did that money, grab that money
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] One night I had some
[Phil:] Anyway it's number A
[Gary:] No it ain't don't tell me the answer
[Shelly:] I asked all these questions to
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Well I should play this with Uncle John
[Julie:] Oh god
[Gary:] If you wanna, do you want to do all the movements then?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] He'll wanna show you what, what, what these things are won't he?
[Shelly:] What so he's
[Gary:] we haven't looked at that, we haven't looked at that video yet have you?
[Shelly:] No, we asked him and he said it was with his work mates
[Phil:] [reading] Post, post courteous ominor ominer
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Ominer
[Phil:] animals,est, testes []
[Gary:] Testicles
[Shelly:] Intestine
[Phil:] no, animal estesties means
[Shelly:] Ain't the other one easier?
[Phil:] means A all animals are
[Gary:] Bollock-less
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No, sad out of the bonking, all people secretly like to bonk animals
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] all animals are tired after bonking
[Gary:] C
[Phil:] No
[Gary:] A
[Phil:] Yeah
[Gary:] Embarrassed at bonking
[Shelly:] Curious way to bonk animals
[Phil:] No at A... he didn't want that letter anyway it was number A
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Gary:] Ah it's too easy for you
[Julie:] [reading] What is a Don Juan? A, an ol an old on going erotic role playing game, B an attractive reckless seducer and C a drink which is consumed in one go []?
[speaker004:] B
[Julie:] Shit
[speaker004:] Mm ...
[Julie:] Here we go my turn
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah, let's kick some ass man, what do they call a blow job cos, it's not a blow job is it?
[Shelly:] [reading] What is a
[Gary:] You don't blow you suck.
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] what is an agent []
[Gary:] What about a deep throat
[Julie:] Gary
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I've seen it so, go on
[Shelly:] [reading] What is an agent provocateur?
[Gary:] Not one of them
[Shelly:] [reading] A sexual go between, a secret agent planted to seduce the enemy into misbehaving, a chemical in massage oil which makes you tingle []
[Gary:] In a bathroom having a wank
[Julie:] Erm A
[Shelly:] No, it was an agent planted to seduce the enemy into misbehaving, listen to this one, [reading] does a lollipop lady do blow jobs in blue movies, help British children across the road, display downward trends at the stock market [] it's fucking easy innit?... Oh shit...
[Julie:] [reading] What does the book, The Joy Of Sex, describe an orgasm as? A, an enormous explosion
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] B, the most religious moment in a person's life []
[Gary:] What's this?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] hang on Gal, [reading] or C like jumping off a cliff into the sea []
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's this one?
[Julie:] [reading] What does the book, The Joy Of Sex, describe an orgasm as []?
[Phil:] I'll give it C, I give C
[Julie:] No B, the most religious moment in a person's life
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh yeah I suppose you shout oh god I'm coming [LAUGHTER], every time that bloody thing goes off [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] I've gotta go and blow my nose myself before a piece comes out of it
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Gary hasn't seen er, shall we, Walk on The Wild Side has he?
[Julie:] Dunno, don't think so...
[Shelly:] Oh god
[Gary:] And then she took half a roll
[Shelly:] come on it's your turn Gary
[Gary:] I know she's got a big conk, but bloody hell
[Julie:] Oh [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Right let's go
[Shelly:] should of had the microphone out of the
[Gary:] Hit me with it quickly, do you want some more?
[Shelly:] No thanks I've just had to spit me coffee back in there [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] You're not bloody
[Phil:] Erm
[Gary:] Well what happened?
[Shelly:] I had a mouthful of coffee and I thought that she farting
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] When did she make the coffee?
[Shelly:] No that's still the first one, urgh
[Julie:] That's what I made earlier
[Gary:] Urgh fucking hell Shell
[Phil:] Got a
[Gary:] tip your coke, why don't you tip your coffee back in there and then there's this coke
[Shelly:] No I'm drinking that and that's secondhand that.
[Phil:] [reading] What does, what does Lou, Lou Reed describe at the beginning of his song, Walk On The Wild Side? Right, A, shave pussies
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] B, transvestite
[Gary:] Finger licking good
[Phil:] C, wandering down Sidney Oxford Street []?
[Gary:] What was B?
[Phil:] Transvestite...
[Gary:] C
[Phil:] No, B
[Gary:] B fucking transvestite, I thought it was
[Phil:] I've heard of it
[Shelly:] What was the first one licking pussy?
[Phil:] No
[Gary:] finger licking good
[Phil:] first one was erm shave pussy
[Shelly:] Oh
[Gary:] Shave pussy
[Phil:] Yeah finger licking good
[Julie:] Finger licking good and wipe under the table
[Phil:] Swap one card with a player of your choice, ah I swap with you cos I don't think you're the only fucker that has got one have you?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] Other than me
[Julie:] I ain't got one yet Nor have I
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] An A for an A [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Well go to the top of the class for having an A, well don't tell them what we've got Shell
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh here we go...
[Gary:] That other one was easy
[Shelly:] oh which one do I go for?
[Phil:] It's gonna be a fucking long game and all, there's worse to come
[Shelly:] [reading] The Three Hundred Club is for people who have A, done a South Pole streak from sauna, two thousand, oh two hundred degrees Fahrenheit to outdoors minus one hundred degrees Fahrenheit or a penis, a penis of over three hundred millimetres long or a club for people who have made love in a helicopter []?
[Phil:] Oh I got a
[speaker004:] Oh the last one
[Shelly:] No the first one
[speaker004:] Oh was it?
[Shelly:] someone who's done a streak from a sauna to outdoors in the South Pole, mm, that's enough to turn your nibbles on
[Gary:] I know where number two club is, but that's about it...
[Julie:] [reading] In a nineteen sixty eight sex survey, which men preferred small breasts? A, depressed men, B, men who played indoor games or C, men who take their coffee black []? B No A, depressed men
[Shelly:] You depressed are you Phil?
[Phil:] Yeah, I'm always happy darling, I shall want, I don't have black coffee, what was the other one?
[Shelly:] Play indoor games
[Julie:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Mm, you're playing an indoor game now
[Phil:] We do in bed don't we, that's a little game
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Squash
[Phil:] ah, when we play
[Shelly:] middle
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] ...
[Phil:] I hide it and she finds it [LAUGHTER], she seeks for it anyway
[Shelly:] yeah his eyebrows go right down don't they?
[Phil:] And glasses do you see?... Go on Gal give me a nice easy one...
[Gary:] Nothing, can't even read that one through, go with this one. [reading] Happy weekend is the name of A, a kit sold in sex shops for dirty weekends, B, a German sex magazine listing positions, or C, allow Abba L P []?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I nearly said an L B
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] B
[Gary:] Yeah I
[Shelly:] cor where'd you buy it from then?
[Gary:] The other one was erm, important men can get erections and it was pretty easy so I thought fuck it
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] fuck it I'll give him all the easy ones don't I?
[Julie:] Go on then your go
[Phil:] You'd of got the second one wouldn't you?
[Julie:] I don't know
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] This is a good one Jul, you'll like this one
[Phil:] Touch her
[Julie:] Yeah this is to Shell, what do you mean I'll like it?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Er, no I, I'm gonna do the other one, but the other one will be a laugh for work for the boys at work, but I can't say it
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Say it afterwards
[Gary:] Yeah [reading] what is the percentage of uncircumcised men in the world? A, eighty five percent, B, fifty five percent or C, ninety percent []?
[Shelly:] B
[Gary:] No it's A, but this one [reading] what were the knee pads associates [] [LAUGHTER] brown noses you know
[Julie:] Oh yeah
[Gary:] Adrian
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] No Adrian, well erm the bosses men see, they wear the knee pads every day, I say to Jack I say you got a game called Sex Maniac, he says yeah, I'll say well you're fucking in there, knee pads associates...
[Julie:] Your dad was quite chatty, wasn't he at work
[Shelly:] I thought you didn't want to know
[Gary:] What about?
[Julie:] At work
[Gary:] Oh yeah I suppose he was in the sort of
[Shelly:] [reading] Who reputedly sold sex for luncheon vouchers?
[Gary:] Aargh fucking weren't me
[Shelly:] Quinton Crisp
[Julie:] Golden Wonder his name Crispen weren't it?
[Shelly:] Frank Harris or Cynthia Payne []?
[Phil:] Oh definitely
[Julie:] Cynthia Payne
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] yeah it had to be
[Gary:] Yeah it had to be didn't it?
[Shelly:] I don't know, who is she?
[Gary:] She's the one who got done, that
[Julie:] She's the whore isn't she?
[Gary:] She's the one who had the whorehouse, she had the whorehouse
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] Yes she's the
[Gary:] She's the one who did it for money
[Phil:] That's the one in Texas
[Julie:] No, she had the luncheon vouchers
[Phil:] she had, she had the whorehouse in Texas didn't she?
[Julie:] Yeah but what she call it?
[Phil:] Chicken, chicken something
[Gary:] House
[Phil:] chicken ranch
[Gary:] chicken, chicken, chicken
[Julie:] No what is she?
[Gary:] chicken whore she's a fucking
[Julie:] No not a whore she was named
[Phil:] She was a pimp
[Gary:] she's a something girl, she's a fucking something girl
[Phil:] Yeah, she's a
[Julie:] Oh god, yeah
[Phil:] she's a firm
[Shelly:] Scarlet [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] I can't remember
[Phil:] Cos it was a chicken ranch, there was a programme on one night about it
[Gary:] She's, she's she's what's it called, her
[Julie:] Madame Cynthia
[Gary:] Madame Cynthia, is that what she was, yeah?
[Julie:] I, I'm trying to think, oh that's mine innit?
[Shelly:] What letter was that?
[Julie:] I'm not telling you
[Gary:] A bit smokey in here
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] I haven't even lit them up yet
[Julie:] [reading] Which famous hotelier forbade unlawful sex in their hotel? A, Meg Richardson, from Crossroads, B, Basil Fawlty
[Gary:] Had this one before
[Julie:] or C, Charles Forte []?
[Phil:] I'll got for B
[Julie:] Yeah
[Phil:] Basil Fawlty
[Shelly:] Really?
[Julie:] Yeah Mm
[Phil:] Yes
[Julie:] Fawlty Towers
[Phil:] I've heard it before
[Gary:] Yeah, that was an easy one actually, cos that one was on telly
[Julie:] Was it, was it then?
[Shelly:] Yeah, he went bonking with his missus every night on Fawlty Towers didn't he? Oh no they had single beds didn't they?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] Gary it's not yours
[Shelly:] Who's go is it?
[Julie:] Oh oh he's looking at the card, Phil's go to Gary...
[Shelly:] See somebody could of won by now
[Phil:] Some of these
[Shelly:] they're all brainy
[Gary:] Depends what these questions, you don't have to be fucking brainy have you, you've got to know all about sex
[Shelly:] Yeah, but I asked a load to Phil's dad and
[Phil:] What's that word Jul?
[Shelly:] he answered every single one of them right
[Phil:] Just tell me what that word is
[Gary:] Just say no more, than that shit
[Phil:] just say that, how's that
[Julie:] Need that
[Phil:] Ask Gary that question
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell
[Gary:] Yeah, but they're looking at this tape and they're saying cor they're a bunch of fucking thickos aren't they?
[Shelly:] Yeah, but I wonder how many of them can answer these questions
[Gary:] Yeah, they'll be
[Shelly:] have a fucking go at that matey [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Right this is Phil's question to you [reading] what is furthest titism? []
[Gary:] Furthest titism
[Julie:] furthest titism
[Gary:] Titism
[Phil:] Right
[Gary:] Yeah
[Phil:] [reading] the female provarian no the female preference to male clothes, B, children, children's habit of dressing up in their own parents' clothes, C, a morbid fear of eggs []?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] A morbid fear of?
[Shelly:] Eggs
[Phil:] [spelling] E G G S [] you know comes out of fanny's clit
[Shelly:] What
[Phil:] no, go on then
[Julie:] Comes out of a chicken's arse don't you mean?
[Phil:] Yeah, but go on, go on
[Shelly:] a fanny's clit [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Fanny, yeah
[Julie:] Oh, who's going first?
[Gary:] B
[Phil:] No, A, a female preference to male's clothes
[Shelly:] Is it in your way?
[Phil:] Who's way me, that was me
[Shelly:] you've won a card have you?
[Julie:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Oh yeah Basil Fawlty one
[Julie:] Mm
[Phil:] You asked if I'd got it that's how I got it, knew what it was
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Fish tank I can hear
[Gary:] Yeah, turn it off then, just that, just turn the light out, save the electricity
[Julie:] How much electric does that use?
[Gary:] Not a lot that black box, give it a white switch, no there's a white switch at the bottom, no, on, in front, behind the, that's it.
[Julie:] Can you imagine playing this when you're just out your head?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] What is the modern implication of pride in relation to sex? A, slapstick [LAUGHTER], slapstick sex using flour, love of the family or pride in being gay []?
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] No C
[Julie:] Oh... how do you know they're saying the right
[Shelly:] Yeah [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You can have a look then if you don't believe me, cunt...
[Shelly:] Oh you're giving me a card are you?
[Julie:] I think I'll have one of your cards...
[Shelly:] Oh for fuck sake I've got to swap one of mine for one of yours now...
[Julie:] That's better.
[Gary:] You got to go again cunt [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Yeah she hasn't had a question yet
[Shelly:] Yeah, I haven't had a question
[Gary:] Don't shuffle with my words do I?
[Julie:] No
[Shelly:] Ah, ooh shit
[Gary:] I thought I shuffled them quite well then, don't you?...
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Ah shit, which one shall I go for?...
[Julie:] Any one, we'll make a move soon
[Phil:] It's twelve o'clock
[Gary:] We haven't finished yet...
[Shelly:] [reading] Who is a pop singer, who is the pop singer with pierced genitals? [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Mary Hopkins, Ozzie Osborne or Genesis []?...
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ozzie Osborne
[Gary:] Gotta be innit?
[Shelly:] No Genesis
[Julie:] I was gonna go for that but I thought that was too bloody obvious
[Shelly:] The other one was
[Gary:] No, no I thought Ozzie Osborne
[Shelly:] [reading] What is a merkin, a pubic wig
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Cornish slang for a prostitute or a jock strap worn by, initiates in a masonic ritual []?
[Phil:] C
[Gary:] C
[Phil:] C
[Shelly:] It's a pubic wig
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] How do you know he's that bulge down there [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Just what you've always wanted, oh
[Shelly:] Pubic wig, have you ever heard of a pubic weapon
[Gary:] See me as a, you know when, when the bloke comes running says it's funny
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] did it and the chest wig comes off, you imagine with a penis, you go up with a penis and you, oh what's that she says, what's that?
[Shelly:] Oh no, can't read that one, that's too easy
[Gary:] She say, what's that?
[Shelly:] [reading] what's the opening []
[Gary:] you can have a bit more space then Phil can't you?
[Shelly:] Shh, shh, shh, shh, hang on a minute can't
[Julie:] Watch his feet Gal
[Shelly:] [reading] what's the opening immediately behind the clitoris []? [LAUGHTER] You'll like this one Gary, [reading] is it A, the virgin []
[Gary:] Erm
[Shelly:] no wait for it, [reading] B, urethra P hole or C, the nook where the clitoris hides, so men can never find it [] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Gary:] C
[Shelly:] No B, the urethra or P hole key hole I was gonna say
[Phil:] I was gonna go for that one, but the, the last one going was pretty good
[Julie:] Well it would of been easier for a woman to answer wouldn't it?
[Phil:] That would of sounded good
[Julie:] Cos like you always thought that women only had two holes...
[Phil:] They have haven't they?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Your go Phil
[Julie:] what are you doing Gary? Oh a bloody fag
[Gary:] Yeah I'm trying to get rid of it, bit more left though, long time, it's fucking too much
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Come on []
[Phil:] [reading] Ooze means to []
[Julie:] What?
[Gary:] Sorry?
[Phil:] ooze
[Shelly:] Ooze
[Phil:] right, which is spelt [spelling] O O Z E [] right?
[Gary:] Mm
[Phil:] [reading] means to make love in mud, B, use bodily secretions from one part of the body on another part
[Shelly:] Oh
[Phil:] C, move your feet slowly and sneakily []?
[Gary:] A
[Phil:] No, C, move your feet... that one was about another fucking film or something
[Gary:] Was it the word fucking, it's, some of these words
[Julie:] Oh, who's thought up this bloody game he must be sick in the head, Paul Hammond...
[Phil:] You need about fucking forty eight hours to get through this
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] Is with butter used as a sex aid, A, MASH
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] B,
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] A, MASH, B, Out of Africa or C, The Last Tango In Paris []?
[Julie:] C
[Shelly:] Ooh
[Phil:] Paris so it's gotta be dirty innit?...
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh here we go...
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] [reading] what is the donkey pump [LAUGHTER] a special sex position used by men with large organs... an extra spare steam pump or a device used for ar artificial insemination of donkeys []?
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Bloody hell... dunno A
[Shelly:] No it was B
[Julie:] B
[Shelly:] Oh bloody [reading] what is the black bore, oh fucking hell, a foreskin gun []
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] cor fucking hell, that makes me cringe that does
[Julie:] Right Phil your turn...
[Shelly:] Oh god
[Phil:] Pretty serious
[Shelly:] I still can't get over that woman pissing on the audience...
[Julie:] Oh god they're not very good [reading] who had an I Q four times their breast size? A, Mary Pickford her bust was thirty two inches, B, Jane Mansfield, her bust was forty three inches
[Shelly:] Fucking lucky bitch
[Julie:] or C, Albert Einstein his bust was forty six inches []? [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I'll go for B
[Gary:] C
[Julie:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Gotta be C innit?
[Julie:] No B Jane Mansfield, her bust was forty three
[Phil:] B he's, he's gotta have more than forty, he's gotta have more
[Julie:] the other one was a bit, [reading] what was the love that dare not speak it's name? Homosexuality, love between nuns, or sex []
[Shelly:] What was that?
[Julie:] I dunno
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] A
[Phil:] Homosexual
[Julie:] was it A?
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] That was a guess
[Phil:] Let's see if I can read this one, I'm not reading all that lot
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Ooh he's trying to wank the table leg now [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I'm not
[Phil:] Look, look at all that, fucking reading that out
[Gary:] Fucking hell is that the one, is that for one answer?... Fucking hell, go for it then, we've got all night, we don't have dinner till one o'clock so it don't matter, we'll still be sat here.
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Mm
[Gary:] Cow's that make the tea...
[Shelly:] [yawn]
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Come on
[Phil:] No, I go for this one
[Shelly:] Oh god
[Gary:] it's shorter
[Phil:] [reading] Is Miss Brit Ekland
[Gary:] Brit Ekland, yeah
[Phil:] Ekland, talking about when she said it can handle a woman like a lift, he knew exactly where to locate the top button, one flick and we were on our way
[Gary:] Only one question whether she was up or down
[Phil:] Warren Beatty, A, Warren Beatty, B, Stan Laurel, C, Tom Cruise []?
[Gary:] A, Warren Beatty...
[Shelly:] Another A [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Thank you
[Phil:] Only one letter asked...
[Julie:] We've all got two cards now haven't we?
[Shelly:] Oh we're all getting there [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] No Gary's got three I think
[Shelly:] taken us, mm, half an hour [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] Which monarch had a liking for sex with horses []?... it's er, done that one, but it don't matter
[Julie:] Well do the other one then
[Gary:] No it's fucking longer
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] A, A, Frederick the Great, B, Charlie Mangly [], fucking hell who's he?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] and C, Catherine the Great []?...
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] C, Catherine the Great
[Shelly:] She had a what?
[Phil:] Had to be a woman something liking to horses
[Gary:] [reading] Which monarch had a liking for sex with horses []?
[Shelly:] Cor, she must have a big fanny [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] That's why she was called Catherine the Great [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] especially if it's that horse out in Spain, cor his dick was dragging along the bloody floor weren't it and everyone was taking photos of it
[Gary:] that's why she's called Catherine the Great
[Phil:] Have fun
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] She should of fucking put
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]... [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Fucking
[Shelly:] I bet you were [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Fucking horse sick more like it
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [reading] What do the letters T W A T stand for?
[Gary:] [spelling] T W A T []?
[Shelly:] Yeah twat
[Julie:] self help group at the, for tiny penis men
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] which is tiny willies are tremendous []
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Is that what your joining Gary?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] that's what, I was gonna say that
[Julie:] [reading] a safer sex education manual for street walkers, which is Tuscan, Whores And Trends or the Times World Air Tours []?
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] A
[Phil:] C
[Julie:] B
[Shelly:] B
[Julie:] Save the sex education manual for Tuscan, Whores And Trends... you were smiling then Oh god, who's to my, you're to my right aren't you Shell?
[Phil:] Gal
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] gotta change all of them?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] Oh so what crap have I got now?
[Shelly:] swap all your cards
[Julie:] Oh I've got them two back again [LAUGHTER], ah so one of you, yeah
[Shelly:] Right, ah god
[Gary:] Swap back
[Shelly:] [reading] Swap one card with the player of your choice [], so Gary...
[Julie:] Silly really, cos er, you have that one
[Gary:] mm
[Julie:] You didn't shuffle these very well did you? Ah...
[Gary:] Shall we shuffle them again?
[Julie:] No
[Gary:] We get them fucking out
[Shelly:] Then questions we've answered will come back up
[Phil:] We don't even need them do we?
[Julie:] [reading] What is not a sleazeball? A, an annual gay party in Sidney, B, a [] [LAUGHTER] oh I can't even say that word, hang on
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [reading] make laughing, a derogatory terming degenerate or C, a penis that's so shrunken it looks like a pair of testicles []?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] So what is not a sleazeball?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] A
[Julie:] No C, a penis so shrunken it looks like a pair of testicles, they'll be killing themselves won't they?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] They'll probably go out and buy the game, oh my god it's sick
[Julie:] I thought you, could of stayed the night, couldn't you?...
[Shelly:] Got the dog though ain't we? Means going back in the morning and taking him for a walk...
[Julie:] I know but I've turned it off, so my electric bill will be sky high.
[Phil:] [reading] Why did Japanese stop calling their brother Turkish baths, number, nobody understood they were supposed to be brothers, brothels [], sorry
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] and then the question, instead of the
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I've said the fucking question wrong anyway
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [reading] Why did the Japanese stop calling their brothels Turkish baths anyway, nobody understood they were
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] supposed to be brothels, the Turkish government requested it, they didn't want to, to discriminate against the Greeks []...
[Gary:] A
[Phil:] No B
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] You should ask them both questions on the card, that way we've got a better chance of getting them bloody card for yourself innit?... [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] no
[Gary:] crying over that one
[Shelly:] Mm
[Phil:] [reading] What was the wet dream for A, laundry day at Eton
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] B, sex festival in Amsterdam in the early seventies or C a side show at Blackpool []?
[Julie:] B
[Phil:] Yeah had to be Amsterdam didn't it? Dirty bastards, oh god
[Shelly:] Oh bloody hell why do they have to put such long words in them?
[Julie:] ...
[Phil:] You can piss on coke
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [reading] Who threw off his clothes and danced naked in front of the Holy Art? David king of the Jew, David Bowie or David Frost []?
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Bloody hell, A
[Phil:] A bit frosty weren't it?
[Shelly:] Yeah it was
[Julie:] Had to be didn't it? Yeah Couldn't of been David Frost
[Phil:] Chuck us over a packet of crisps will you? I'm starving
[Shelly:] I've got some crusts down here if you want to
[Gary:] What you got prawn?
[Phil:] Fish, only when you have a bit of sex innit?
[Gary:] I like fish... no thanks
[Julie:] No [reading] Which Hollywood actress had alleged to have had sex with an entire football team which
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] included John Wayne? A, Joan Sutherland, B, Shirley Temple or C, Clara Bow [] Gotta be Shirley Temple then she loved her who is it?
[Gary:] A
[Julie:] No C, Clara Bow
[Phil:] I haven't even heard of her
[Gary:] [singing] On the good ship lollipop [] oh that was Shirley Temple
[Julie:] The other one was a bit silly really cos it says [reading] what is not a shag []?
[Gary:] What is not a shag?...
[Julie:] Yeah, but it, erm, er something dance in the sixties, a med medieval something or other and something else...
[Shelly:] He always gets a crease when he's chewing, his eyebrows when he's concentrating.
[Phil:] [reading] How long does it take to the nearest hour for snails to bonk?
[Shelly:] Do what?
[Gary:] For a snail to bonk
[Phil:] for snails to pbonk []
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] A
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Just thought of something [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I tell your dad cos he called you, he said that you go at a snail's pace didn't he today?
[Phil:] Oh yeah
[Shelly:] When they were watching the bloody running this afternoon
[Phil:] Mm, [reading] A, twelve hours, B, one hour or C, twelve, twenty four hours []
[Julie:] To what?
[Phil:] For snails to bonk...
[Julie:] C Twenty four hours
[Shelly:] A
[Phil:] A
[Julie:] I should of gone for twelve hours
[speaker004:] Twelve hours for a shag, my god
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Be a fucking pensioner
[Phil:] I knew it was that one
[Julie:] before you
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] Twelve hours just to get in the right position
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It is though innit? That's before they started
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] No, if he's not taking much of this in he'd wanna start talking
[Julie:] He's just sat there and when he starts smiling
[Phil:] Must take him about two weeks
[Gary:] [reading] Which of the following is a constant cam campaigner against censorship []? oh no, not that one, [reading] who formed the British prostitutes union? A, Lynsey Saint, Saint Clare, B, Penelope french lessons
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] or C, Her in Buckingham []?
[Shelly:] A
[Gary:] No C
[Shelly:] C, shit
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] He's alright, he likes this time of night don't he?
[Gary:] Mm he'll probably sleep all night... see, see if he does
[Shelly:] No I think he had a dirty bum.
[Julie:] [reading] Which commandment forbids adultery? The fifth, the seventh or none of them actually forbids it []
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] No seventh
[Julie:] Seventh
[Shelly:] Oh
[Gary:] seventh, adultery innit? Us being religious we would
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] You are not
[Phil:] Last commandment that is there's only seven commandments anyway in't there?
[Shelly:] No there's ten
[Gary:] Ten
[Shelly:] I know that much
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh god
[Phil:] What's the other one?
[Julie:] Here are Phil ready?... got to clear me throat for a minute
[Shelly:] The seventh
[Gary:] the why come from where he cometh
[Shelly:] [reading] What does the expression cod piece mean []? [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Now are you ready for this?
[Phil:] Do you know he's just woken up then?
[Shelly:] [reading] A, a fishy smell
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] B, a scrotum protector
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] or C, a play that is a hoax on another play []
[Gary:] B
[Phil:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Yes
[Julie:] Oh
[Shelly:] a scrotum protector
[Julie:] last time I pack my
[Gary:] I've had that one before
[Phil:] Mm
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] not for that, I haven't heard it for that cos I've heard
[Gary:] Yeah I've heard that as
[Phil:] I knew it was definitely one of them
[Julie:] that's why your clothes are always fishy when you take them off at night then?
[Phil:] I knew it was definitely not that
[Gary:] We're even-stevens at the moment, we've both got three
[Julie:] Mm
[Phil:] That's three, six
[Julie:] Yeah, but you've got decent letters I know damn well I haven't
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] I've got three different ones
[Gary:] Yeah I have now because I changed with Phil didn't I?...
[Julie:] Yeah, I didn't have until I had to swap them all round No this one will do me, [reading] what is a man []? Right [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] not a Gary and not a Phil
[Phil:] No
[Julie:] [reading] A, someone with X and Y chro, chromosomes
[Shelly:] Chromosomes
[Julie:] chromosomes, B someone who pees standing up [LAUGHTER] or C, something with, some, someone who has testicles []
[Shelly:] Well it can't be B because Stephanie pisses standing up [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] What is a what chrom
[Julie:] What is a man?
[Shelly:] What is a man?...
[speaker004:] He's gotta think about that [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [reading] The one with X, Y chromosome, someone who pees standing up, someone who has testicles []?...
[Phil:] Two
[Julie:] What?
[Shelly:] It's gotta be C
[Phil:] Two
[Julie:] It's gotta be A No it's not
[Shelly:] A
[Julie:] there is no real definition, the closest is B
[speaker004:] Someone who stands?
[Phil:] I was gonna say B
[speaker004:] Someone who pees standing up?
[Julie:] Yeah, but that's the closest
[Phil:] cos when you said
[Julie:] but there's no real definition
[Shelly:] yeah but you can have a sex change and pee standing up and have testicles, but you can have the X and Y chromosomes... can you? Cos they can't transplant all your hormones as well
[Julie:] Well that's the answer
[Shelly:] Excuse me you twats from the university, send us the answer [LAUGHTER]...
[Julie:] Come on Gal
[Gary:] Sex, sex, sex [reading] What did
[Julie:] sex [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] You've got an A have you?
[Gary:] what did fraud oh Freud believe that most sons wanted to do to their mothers? A, wet their pants [LAUGHTER] wet their pants to annoy them... B, suckle and C, make love to them []
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] You've gotta be in the, no actually it's B
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] really
[Gary:] Mm [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] you wanna fuck your mother do you? Right, go ahead
[Phil:] No I'm not really...
[Julie:] I flashed last time...
[Gary:] Need to annoy their mums mm
[Phil:] Everybody's got three have they?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] Yeah
[Shelly:] I can't fucking read them names
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [reading] Which sex magazine is now run by the founders daughter? Playboy, Men Only or Penthouse []
[Julie:] Penthouse
[Shelly:] Wrong, A or B, well A and B, Playboy and Men Only
[Phil:] You had two chances at it
[Julie:] Mm I went for the wrong one... oh your turn
[Shelly:] Oh god
[Julie:] That's what I like about you darling you're so intelligent
[Phil:] What you've got?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] You've got three A's have you?
[Julie:] [reading] What, what is a cricket? A, a male deer, B, a clitoris or C, a picket line in a sex toy factory [] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What's a cricket?
[Julie:] Yeah that's the answer, that's the question
[Gary:] Mm
[Phil:] A
[Julie:] Yes you're right Phil
[Shelly:] A male deer's a stag
[Julie:] No, says a male deer's a cricket
[Shelly:] Oh I'll know that the next time it comes up in erm
[Gary:] So oh, cricket
[Shelly:] Take A Break
[Julie:] Mm
[Shelly:] that was in this week's and it was a stag... I haven't got this week's, not out today
[Julie:] No, not until Monday, mine's delivered...
[Shelly:] either that it's funny or he can't read the fucking question [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] he likes this one I think
[Phil:] Yeah I like that, I like the sound of that one, but it's got a few big words in it
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] No it's gotta be this one, I might have to get someone to read out the answers
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [reading] What were a crocodile's testicles and alligator's tail used for []? I can read the first question, [reading] A, spices for cooking especial especially Dundee cake
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] B [], you fucking read that
[Shelly:] Oh, [reading] aphrodisiac, aphrodisiac
[Gary:] Mm
[Shelly:] aphrodisiacal potions
[Gary:] Mm
[Shelly:] or primitive contraceptive de, devices []
[Gary:] B
[Phil:] Yeah that's right anyway
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] if I knew what that fucking second word was
[Gary:] Aphrodisiac
[Phil:] I, I wouldn't know it myself, so
[Shelly:] No aphrodisiacal, cos it's got the A, L in
[Gary:] It means something like erm, what it says
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What was that then?
[Shelly:] Cor who gets turned on with fucking crocodile bollocks?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] You never know
[Shelly:] Urgh, can you imagine drinking crocodile
[Gary:] have you seen it, is it monkey's nuts? Er fucking, I tell you, trying... could the player to your, your my
[Shelly:] Right
[Gary:] That's right, give them one
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Give me one of your cards
[Shelly:] let them all out
[Phil:] Give me your cards dear
[Shelly:] Get out the cooking oil
[Julie:] I bet he's got four different ones
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] I had to do it that way didn't I?
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] Looks like he's choking on a crocodile's bollock there, [LAUGHTER]...
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Right [reading] which English monarch [], I'm always getting the Monarch ones, [reading] had a [LAUGHTER] had a red hot poker shoved up his royal
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] shoved up his royal backside []?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] That's, this one's easy
[Gary:] This is an easy one here, [reading] A, George the Fifth, B [] I'm ready
[Phil:] He fucking wasn't erm ready, when that went up was he?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [reading] or C, Edward the second []
[Shelly:] That's that
[Julie:] easy, I know that
[Shelly:] C
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] It's C
[Julie:] Oh is it?
[Gary:] She does, I was gonna say this one
[Shelly:] Not another A is it?
[Gary:] [reading] how many concubine King David son of Solomon have to the nearest hundred? A, ten, seven words for ea each concubine [LAUGHTER] B, two hundred, a hundred and forty was, sixty concubine [LAUGHTER] or C, a thousand, seven hundred wives or three, three hundred concubine []
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Fucking hell he had seven hundred wives
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] fucking hell, fucking hell
[Julie:] Oh it's a different one
[Phil:] Once you get to nine you can't have any more letters
[Julie:] Yeah you've gotta put one at the bottom of the pack
[Gary:] Eight innit?
[Phil:] Well that's no good cos you can't spell sex maniac
[Julie:] Oh more than nine
[Shelly:] It's when you get to ten you've gotta stop, you've got to put one at the bottom
[Phil:] Yes, so you can get, once you've got your tenth one, if you can make the word that's it
[Gary:] You've won, but if you can't you've got to put one at the bottom
[Phil:] Mm
[Gary:] What's concubine?
[Julie:] Don't know, get a dictionary dictionary...
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]... That's fucking smart arse is and all, this one
[Shelly:] [reading] A sexual surrogate will A, have sex with you if he can't find anyone else, all the things nobody else is prepared to do with you sexually, or teach you how to... draw you the partner you want []?
[Julie:] A
[Shelly:] C
[Julie:] Oh
[Shelly:] teach you how to draw the partner you want
[Phil:] Not like saying you would of got it after you did get it
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh god here we go
[Gary:] What?
[Julie:] I'm not saying that one cos that's what we were on about earlier
[Shelly:] Oh the or whatever it is
[Phil:] Here it is concubine
[Julie:] Oh hang on
[Phil:] [reading] woman cohabiting with a man to whom she's not married, second wife [] fucking hell that's er
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] some we had, what was it
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Three hundred and fifty
[Phil:] dick must of fell off... did you have the answer right or not?
[Shelly:] Yeah I did, didn't I?
[Gary:] Yeah you got the answer though
[Shelly:] Three hundred concubine
[Gary:] And how many fucking wives? Seven hundred
[Shelly:] Seven hundred
[Julie:] So he had a thousand women
[Gary:] A thousand
[Julie:] altogether
[Gary:] dirty bastard
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Fuck me they had no telly in those days, but that's fucking beyond a joke
[Julie:] right ready Phil I was gonna read that one out Jesus but you'll already get that
[Gary:] He must of been totally fucked
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] two a night, fucking shit
[Phil:] Fucking hell
[Gary:] very nice
[Julie:] [reading] Whose penis was said to be as damn near as big as his guitar?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] A, er Eric Clapton, B, Keith Richard or C, Jimmy Hendricks []
[Phil:] Oh I dunno
[Gary:] A
[Shelly:] I dunno
[Julie:] No C
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] Jimmy Hendricks
[Julie:] the other one was [reading] where is the G spot located []?
[Gary:] Yeah I know that
[Julie:] but I heard that er, you didn't know that...
[Gary:] No I did
[Shelly:] No, none of us got that one right to start with
[Gary:] I said in the fanny
[Shelly:] no, we never got it right, what were the answers on that?
[Julie:] [reading] Inside the virgin, on the in underside of each breast or behind the knee []
[Phil:] And that big bogey up your nose
[Shelly:] oh
[Phil:] [reading] They were both castrated
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] they were both treated with ex,ex,extrotic, no
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Erotic
[Phil:] ex, yeah, [reading] erotic for homosexual symptoms, they both had VD []
[Julie:] Oh no I've had this one
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] I'm going for B but I
[speaker004:] Yeah it is
[Julie:] think it's C
[Phil:] It's C anyway
[Julie:] Yeah, both had VD
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER] How did, how did
[Julie:] I knew it had
[Phil:] they know, how did they know he had VD when he fucking died
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] and they, they never even found, found a fucking body
[Shelly:] He committed suicide because he found his gas bill
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Shelly:] how can he have VD if one bollock's in the Albert Hall?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] That's baffled Phil, that's too complicated for him
[Phil:] No got, no I've got all got VD as well, no all got VD as well
[Julie:] Don't want to find
[Phil:] [singing] Hitler's only got one ball, the other is in the Albert Hall
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] his mother, the dirty bugger, a little
[Julie:] Okay, yeah I could of done with that this afternoon when Eleanor were there.
[Phil:] What?
[Julie:] Yeah that was really good when stand up there [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's a serious day again
[Shelly:] You should of heard the argument about the poll tax, that was funny
[Gary:] [reading] What sex aid did the Tibetan monk invent? A, the vibrator, B, the french tickler or C, crutchless knickers []
[Shelly:] A monk [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Tibetan monk I suppose that is, A, the vibrator, B, the french tickler or C, crutchless knickers
[Shelly:] A
[speaker004:] C
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] No C, the crutchless knickers
[Shelly:] Oh, dirty bugger
[Gary:] no B the french tickler
[Julie:] I said B
[Gary:] Yes you did darling, sorry
[Julie:] Mm...
[Gary:] what's a french tickler? It's one of those fucking ticklers innit?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's like a feather thing innit
[Gary:] It is innit?
[Phil:] on the top, Ken Dodd used to have one
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] He did
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] A tickling stick, yeah
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [reading] What did Ancient Roman men hold when swearing an oath []?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Their penis []
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [reading] Their testicles
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] their or their wife's tits []?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Or their wife's tits []
[speaker004:] Yeah, their wife's tits
[Shelly:] Their, their testicles
[Phil:] catch the pubes
[Julie:] Right then Phil oh
[Shelly:] Swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but
[Gary:] Ha ha, squeeze, cough
[Julie:] give the player to your right one
[Gary:] squeeze, cough
[Shelly:] Oh yeah
[Phil:] Give the player to your right one
[Julie:] One of your cards it says underneath
[Gary:] Just give the player to your right
[Julie:] That's Shell
[Gary:] Oh again
[Julie:] Mm, mm
[Gary:] you don't take one back, you don't take one back, just take another one
[speaker004:] Well that takes you two up I suppose Julie, been wondering about you lately darling
[Julie:] No, I've only got to give you one card
[speaker004:] Wonder why you've been funny about it
[Shelly:] Oh Julie
[Julie:] What, oh
[Shelly:] one, two, three four
[Julie:] oh god, swap one card with a player to your right
[Shelly:] Right you should have that bugger back, that leaves me with four
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh shit
[Shelly:] oh bloody hell, I suppose you'll give me another one, oh... oh my I, [LAUGHTER] how many have I got? Two, four
[Julie:] she keeps on getting them don't she?...
[speaker004:] [reading] What are Chinese balls? A device women insert up their fanny to arrange themselves, B, the dry testicles of balls which the Chinese consider a great aphrodisiac or C a venereal [LAUGHTER] a venereal disease which makes your balls turn yellow [LAUGHTER] []
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] So, ask the question again?
[Julie:] What are Chinese balls?... Are they something that a woman inserts
[Shelly:] They're all fucking yellow aren't they?
[Phil:] Yeah
[Julie:] up them
[speaker004:] Eh?
[Julie:] or dry testicles of balls which the Chinese consider a great aphrodisiac or a venereal disease which makes your balls turn yellow?
[Gary:] I'll go B, but I reckon it's C
[Phil:] I go B
[Julie:] No it's A
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] a device women insert up their fanny to arrange themselves
[Gary:] Yeah and when they move they fucking move up and down don't they?
[Shelly:] I thought it would of been C cos they're yellow over there in't they?
[speaker004:] Mm?
[Julie:] Is it, I wonder, it was on telly once
[speaker004:] I don't know
[Julie:] where they shove them up
[speaker004:] What you looking at me for?
[Julie:] and then they walk along and when they walk they go ooh nearly killed herself, she stuffed a up her fanny and it stuffed all her
[Phil:] Reverse the directions of play
[Julie:] intest, all her insides up well it would wouldn't it?
[Phil:] Your go
[Julie:] No it's Gary's go
[Phil:] No, change direction, reverse the direction of play
[Julie:] Oh it's my go, oh brilliant
[Shelly:] Oh no...
[Phil:] To Shell this is
[Julie:] [reading] In two different films, Yul Bryner and Julie Christie both have sex with the same thing, what is it? A, a rabbit, B, a bookcase or C, a robot []
[Shelly:] B
[Julie:] No C, a robot
[Gary:] Fucking bookcase
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Your go Shell
[Julie:] You got to read one to Gary now
[Gary:] fucking bookcase
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh your turn to read one to Phillip
[Julie:] Oh god... and again, you didn't shuffle these very well Gal
[Shelly:] Ah... this is to you, cos we've swapped directions again
[Gary:] I did shuffle them Jul
[Julie:] Mm
[Gary:] there's so many of those
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh I, I read this one to you, oh fucking hell [reading] in what way is the whale's penis similar to the elephant? It rolls up, it, it's retractable inside the body or it drops off after an orgasm []
[Julie:] It's retractable inside the body
[Shelly:] Yeah, have an N
[Julie:] There are big head I've nearly won ain't I?
[Shelly:] Ooh imagine it dropping off after having an orgasm
[Phil:] I said that though didn't I? I said that answer, cos it, it
[Shelly:] think of the
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] What did you say?
[Phil:] No I said A, I said the one that you said, so I got that one right
[Shelly:] Retractable inside the body
[Julie:] To you now mate
[Shelly:] oh theirs just drags along the floor...
[Gary:] You can have that one, how many you got?
[Phil:] I've only got four here
[Gary:] [reading] What is a lipsy loop? Tongue in and around the outside of a lovers mate, an inter-uterine device for contraception or a special type of horse race track? Horse race track [reading]
[Phil:] Er loopy loo?
[Gary:] Mm lipsy loop
[Phil:] A
[Shelly:] C
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] It's B, bet you would of got this one wouldn't you? [reading] What is D P? A, D P's the penis, B, double poke, C, double penetration []?
[Phil:] Double penetration
[Gary:] Fucking easy innit? I said you would of got that one
[speaker004:] Probably reverse it to me now [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Probably reverse it again...
[Phil:] Oh that one's not fucking clever is it? Oh, I'll just say this one, but it's fucking easy, [reading] what were the sex pistols []? That's fucking easy
[Julie:] A group
[Phil:] Yes, a punk group, that was one
[speaker004:] ...
[Phil:] [reading] Who edited the, who illus, illustrated presidential report of the commissioners [] [LAUGHTER] oh I wish I didn't have to fucking read
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] this lot, I haven't
[Gary:] No it's not to me it's not
[Julie:] Can't I just have the other one, cos I got that one right?
[Phil:] No I said it was easy anyway
[Gary:] [reading] the commissions of, of and pornography []
[Phil:] [reading] A, L Camp, B, John Holmes, C Henry Kissinger []
[Julie:] Dunno C
[Gary:] C
[Phil:] No, L Camp, A
[Julie:] Wouldn't of got that would you? You could of let me have the first one
[Phil:] No, that one's too easy innit?
[Shelly:] Yeah, well we need to get the cards to win, don't we?
[Phil:] That was an M I wanted an M, start with sex man... cos I've got the L, got that one, got that one, got that one...
[Julie:] [reading] Blade Star is famous for her enormous breasts which she displayed while stripping, her affair with the Governor of Tennessee or her enormous feet []?
[Shelly:] A
[Julie:] Mm
[Phil:] Yeah that one was easy
[Julie:] well that, that's wrong actually
[Gary:] What's that Jul?
[Julie:] Well it's got here A, is her enormous breasts which she displayed while stripping right, well the answer is A and it's got her affair with, with the Governor of Louisiana... where do they want, oh yeah
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh god I've got another one of them
[Julie:] Yes, sorry [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [sigh]
[Julie:] it's alright the other one was her affair with the Governor of Tennessee, I'll get it right in a minute
[Shelly:] Phillip I've got a problem where's my I know you've got a decent hand [LAUGHTER] you fucking arsehole, I've got to ask a question now as well haven't I?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] At least I'm only two away from getting them...
[Shelly:] No you're not
[Phil:] two away from getting all my nine, then I'll just swap in whatever letters I want, pick out another one.
[Shelly:] [reading] Who created Susie Cream Cheese?... Frank Zapper, The Swiss or Pretty Polly Tights and Pantyhose []...
[Gary:] A
[Shelly:] Mm, have another M [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] I haven't got a fucking M my love
[Shelly:] I gave you one of them last time didn't I?...
[Phil:] How many have you got now? You got
[Julie:] I've only got two [LAUGHTER]...
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] I only need an S too and the C
[Shelly:] Well don't tell everybody cos then they'll change
[Gary:] [reading] What, which famous writer has an obsession with his lover's farts?
[Shelly:] Aargh
[Gary:] James Joyce who wrote Ulysses, Kenneth Graham who wrote The Wind in the Willows
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] or C [reading+laughing] Jeffrey Archer [reading]
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] who wrote Cain and Abel []
[Phil:] I'll go for B
[Gary:] No it's A
[Shelly:] Wind in the Willows, it's pretty obviously it's not gonna be that one
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] that was you the night the doctor came round he, he nearly threw up
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] oh god it was, laid in bed, no joke, his fucking pants blew out that far
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Shelly:] he went into the toilet, sits down, fucking pebbledashes the bloody place
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Mm, toilets take a thrashing don't they darling?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] There, ours there the last few days in it, those two being fucking bad
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You mean you
[Gary:] Oh thank you darling, thank you for er, erm
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] They'll probably send down er, a needle, have to stop the runs or something
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Fucking hell, I can't say that one to her can I?
[speaker004:] Why not?...
[Julie:] Mm [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] ain't she?
[Julie:] Yeah, should do
[speaker004:] Oh I like that
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] [reading] When, when the censorship was operated, in Hollywood, what did the amorous couple do to prevent a film from being censored? A, not show their tongues, B, keep one foot on floor, C, profess love before kissing [] this one's easy as well, both of them are easy, because I've heard that before
[Shelly:] B
[Phil:] No, that's wrong, A it was, yeah B it was, that's right
[Shelly:] Oh
[Phil:] but the other one's how many lips does a woman have? That's fucking easy, one, two, or three
[Shelly:] Four
[Phil:] Fucking three
[Shelly:] It's four
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] It's only a choice out of one, two or three Shell [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] It's gotta be three that's
[Shelly:] I actually got that right
[Julie:] Oh yeah [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] bloody hell
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] gosh... [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Sorry about that
[Julie:] I've we've, just, when we get home you can count my lips for me [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] Depends if you're down all the time or not [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [reading] Where is the video porn centre of the East?
[Julie:] Sorry Jul
[speaker004:] Bangkok Thailand, Manila Philippines or A C T Australia []
[Shelly:] The Philippines
[Gary:] B
[Julie:] No C Australia, that a bit weren't it?...
[Shelly:] Ooh fucking hell... [reading] which animal has the most sperm in one ejaculation? A horse, a mink or a golden hamster []...
[Gary:] A mink
[Shelly:] A horse has eight billion
[Gary:] Mm
[Shelly:] mind you it's not surprising the size of their dicks when they get horny is it?...
[Gary:] It's the mink that kills the er female innit? After he's made love to her
[Phil:] That's why there ain't many left in the country innit?
[Gary:] What's that?
[Julie:] I've put down that rat races is Waddington's and toilet rolls [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Yeah Waddington's, cos we've always been saying ain't we?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] What just to remind you?
[Shelly:] Yeah you wanna go to Ostens and get the address of them
[Julie:] Mm...
[Gary:] [reading] What is a? A, a
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] yeah for a specific part of the body, B, a sex party or C, a device for separating dogs who get locked together during sex []?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Oh, dogs who get locked together during sex [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] One, two, three, four
[Julie:] Your go Phil
[Gary:] people won't say that though will they part
[Phil:] five, six
[Gary:] , for two of them
[Phil:] eight
[Gary:] you'd part them wouldn't you?
[Julie:] You've got eight have you?
[Phil:] Yeah
[Shelly:] Nearly all A
[Gary:] You've got eight?
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] You only need two As anyway don't you?
[Julie:] he had to do a swap didn't he with Shell?
[Shelly:] Yeah and now I'm left with four
[Julie:] Mm
[Shelly:] I thought he had more than that, he was saying he's got sex man
[Julie:] Do you have any of them Shell?
[Shelly:] Only about seven of the buggers
[Phil:] Oh dear
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh
[Gary:] How many cards, how many you got Juls?
[Julie:] Three [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Got one more than you
[Phil:] Alright
[Shelly:] Oh here we go might have
[Phil:] [reading] Which star did er Florida, police compel to perform without moving? Elvis Presley, Linda Lovelace or Don Johnson []...
[Julie:] C
[Gary:] A
[Phil:] A Elvis Presley
[Julie:] Oh, wouldn't of got that either...
[Phil:] Here you go Jul
[Shelly:] innit Phil?
[Phil:] Yeah I know
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] [reading] Whose words are these? It is in sleep that the wild beast in our nature rears up and walks about, Mary Shelley, Alice Cooper or Plato []?
[Shelly:] B
[Julie:] No C, the other one was a bit daft as well, a bit like that
[Phil:] Should of swapped with me Gal, those two are the only cards I don't need
[Shelly:] [reading] Either change direction or reverse the play []
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Right ready Phil? Oh god, give the player to your left one oh shit
[Shelly:] You should read the last word on this
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] I'm not doing very well here
[Shelly:] Oh you're down to two now
[Julie:] Right, yeah, I'm still on, down to two now, no you don't have to swap with me
[Phil:] Don't I? Well I've got nine now
[Shelly:] If you get any more you've got to put one back on the bottom of the pile
[Julie:] [reading] Which duke was denied entrance to a club because he was wearing trousers? Duke Ellington, The Duke of Wellington or The Duke of Edinburgh []?...
[Phil:] Depends on which way he comes
[Gary:] Duke of ski pants
[Phil:] A
[Julie:] No B, you could of had the other one actually, Hoffmeister is, but I mean that's an easy one innit?
[Phil:] Lager
[Julie:] But I didn't give you it.
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] Come on
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Good lord
[Phil:] This is it, [reading] what did Victorian men do to prevent themselves getting aroused while sleeping []?... Do you remember this one?
[Shelly:] No
[Phil:] [reading] A, tie a string around their penis... B, [LAUGHTER] sleep with their penis in [LAUGHTER] in a bowl of cold water
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] C, play with themselves before going to sleep []?
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] C
[Phil:] Answer A and probably C [LAUGHTER] A
[Julie:] Well I can have that
[Phil:] No, and probably C
[Julie:] Well then
[Phil:] They probably fuck and play with themselves anyway
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] They tied their fucking penis
[Phil:] No, the answer was tied string around their penis, their penis
[Shelly:] Oh you'll have to try that tonight then Phil
[Phil:] but they probably played with themselves before they fucking tied the string round, no
[Julie:] I think I should have that don't you everybody?
[Phil:] says, it says A and
[Shelly:] No
[Phil:] probably
[Julie:] I did say A, B
[Phil:] look, look
[Shelly:] no
[Julie:] I did say A, C didn't I?
[Phil:] it says A
[Julie:] Yeah
[Phil:] and then in, erm things, and probably play, play with them, the other one was erm [reading] who slept with naked woman on the, either side of the test with foul of
[Shelly:] oh come off
[Phil:] upside down Ghandi [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] here, you've gotta fucking read upside down really have
[Phil:] You would of got that, you would of got that...
[Julie:] I didn't think this game took so long...
[Shelly:] It doesn't cos how many do you need Phil?
[Phil:] Done with
[Shelly:] mind, you've got to change his nappy
[Gary:] Yeah
[Julie:] Mm
[Phil:] I need three different letters now, no, if it, if how many letters, I need four
[Gary:] [reading] If you were, if you were a castratie what would you do for a living? A, look after a harem, B, cut up meat, or C, sing []?
[Shelly:] A
[Gary:] C
[Shelly:] No you cataramie
[Phil:] Cut up meat
[Gary:] is it cataramie that's what I said?
[Phil:] cut meat weren't it?
[Gary:] cataratie or something castratie er, or something, casteratie, casteratie...
[Shelly:] [reading] What is a common symptom of alcoholism? Bigamy forgetting you already have a wife or husband, thinking you have two partners, when you only have one or permanent impudent []
[Julie:] B
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] Got three, three cards now ain't you?
[Shelly:] yeah...
[Julie:] [reading] What is a humby An erection on public transport, an irritating noise whilst driving a car or humming up the vagina []?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Hum [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] hum
[Phil:] I'll go for C but it's B I would of thought, I'll go for C
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] It's A
[Phil:] A is it?
[Julie:] It's A, an erection on public transport
[Shelly:] Next time you get out on the bus ask them personally if you've got a humby Is that still going?
[Julie:] Mm
[Shelly:] Righto
[Julie:] there's not a lot I can do about that
[Gary:] You cut, there's your card
[Julie:] Ah
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] you are now mate, you only need one...
[Julie:] Do you?
[Phil:] No, I ain't got sex, he has nearly sex
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Oh don't worry about it, nor have I I've got C...
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] Is Gary there?
[Julie:] Phil's to Gary
[Phil:] Fucking hell, these are too easy... this is you, you might not get
[Gary:] Good
[Phil:] [reading] who said she was a, as pure as er driven slush? Julie Andrews, Olivia Newton John... Tallulah Bankhead []
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] that's what it says, torn unless you that, unless you wanna say difficult
[Gary:] B
[Phil:] No, it was the C one
[Gary:] Who was she?
[Phil:] Tallulah Banks, Banks something
[Gary:] No, a bit of a shaggy dogs story
[Shelly:] Right your go Gal
[Julie:] Cor wouldn't of fucking got that one
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] What a shaggy dogs story.
[Julie:] Go on then
[Phil:] Yeah
[Gary:] Oh yeah, something
[speaker004:] ...
[Gary:] Ah Julie knows that one
[Shelly:] But you have to the questions in there
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] [reading] What is a butterfly kiss?...
[Julie:] Well go on with it then
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]... what is a daisy pal? A, having hairy buttocks, B, a prehistoric monster with large fingers
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] or C, an Egyptian style of body painting []?
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] Yeah, but er a butterfly kiss, [reading] light feather, feathery kissing, kissing during mid or pattering of the skin with eye lashes []?
[Julie:] C
[Shelly:] C
[Gary:] Yeah
[Shelly:] I should get two cards for that shouldn't I? Ha, oh god
[Phil:] I've got the nine have I? Yes I have, game innit?
[speaker004:] No you ain't got the right ones
[Julie:] He's got nine
[Phil:] I've got his
[Julie:] change hands it says till the person
[Phil:] change his innit?
[speaker004:] yeah, but he's not got the right letters
[Julie:] Yeah, but he's
[Phil:] No, but I'm asking
[Julie:] he only needs a couple to get them
[Phil:] I only need about five
[Shelly:] [reading] What was the philosopher Manuelle Kans when he died? Very happy, very ill he had
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] or he was a virgin []?
[Julie:] C
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] That was only a guess, oh shit I don't want that
[Phil:] How many letters have you got? all different letters have you got?
[Julie:] No, I've got three different letters and one that's the same as another
[Phil:] I was new before I met you...
[Julie:] [reading] Complete the film title, prick up [] er, oh start again, [reading] prick up your ears, bottom or pantyhose []?
[Gary:] Ears
[Shelly:] Oh it's ears I think
[Julie:] I don't think you'd be very pleased at that
[Phil:] No I don't know
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] no, there's only one set E in sex... fucking hell this is the one I wanted
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] he wants it as well, you need this one Gal?
[Gary:] It's getting late mate
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] One o'clock
[Shelly:] Fucking hell
[Gary:] it's fucking late mate
[Shelly:] we've been here twelve hours
[Gary:] it's getting late mate... yeah there's better than my sandwiches, alright innit dinner?
[Phil:] Yeah, this one, cos he knows quite a few,thi, few things about films so I won't say that one
[Julie:] Mm
[Phil:] that one
[Gary:] I don't actually I'm not very good on films at all
[Phil:] [reading] In order to still his sexual passions Sir Frances took an unusual wife, what was unusual about her A, she was made of snow, B, she had no vagina, [LAUGHTER] C, she lived a thousand miles away []?...
[Julie:] Yeah, well the fucking snow, gonna marry fuck all after that
[Shelly:] I was gonna say A
[speaker004:] No
[Julie:] C
[Phil:] A
[Julie:] B
[Shelly:] Oh was it?
[Phil:] she was made of snow [LAUGHTER] why do you think
[Julie:] What was the film one?
[Phil:] fucking cold made in fucking
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Oh yeah good one
[Gary:] [reading] In which film does the Dustin Hoffman character has sex with both mother and daughter []? Actually I didn't fucking know that one
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You still didn't get it
[Julie:] well which, what was the titles then Gary?...
[Gary:] Mm
[Julie:] Which film does he have?
[Gary:] Dustin Hoffman that was
[Julie:] Yeah, which film does he have sex with mother and
[Gary:] Midnight Cowboy, The Graduate, Rainman
[Shelly:] The Graduate
[Gary:] yes
[Shelly:] Oh, thank you
[Gary:] Rainman was the last one and he didn't have sex with her
[Julie:] Yeah Tom Cruise
[speaker004:] Very good
[Gary:] Very good, yeah [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] in that bloody film...
[Shelly:] Is that all we've
[Julie:] yeah...
[Phil:] I only know that one for being a decent driver...
[Gary:] [sigh] [reading] What is a chin chin? A, dispute in a Chinese marriage,
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Chime, chime
[Gary:] rubbing the undersides of chins together or a toast []?
[Shelly:] B
[Julie:] B
[Gary:] A toast
[Shelly:] Oh
[Phil:] See fucking chin chin
[Shelly:] What about driving then?
[Gary:] Fucking, what is a dead policeman? What is a dead policeman?
[Shelly:] Them balls in the road
[Phil:] mm, slows traffic
[Gary:] Slows traffic
[Shelly:] What's that got to do with sex?
[Phil:] Slows traffic down
[Gary:] What does a dead policeman do or something?
[Phil:] Slows traffic down
[Gary:] Fucking it slows, he's dead in't he?
[Phil:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] He's dead, [LAUGHTER] they all go over him fast then kill the bastard they go []
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Don't fucking moan when he's dead does it?
[Shelly:] [reading] What giant sexual organ escapes in Woody Allen's film Everything You've Always Wanted To Know About Sex?
[Julie:] Ah, I've seen that
[Gary:] So have I
[Shelly:] A, a breast, B, a penis or C a pussy...
[Julie:] Yes C
[Shelly:] A
[Julie:] Oh have got that either Have you ever seen a film called Jungle Burger?
[Phil:] Yeah,Jun, Jungle Burger? Was it Jungle Burger with a
[Shelly:] What is Animal Farm like? Everyone keeps going on about the Animal Farm
[speaker004:] Here are then Phil are you ready?
[Julie:] You Jane, me shave
[Phil:] Oh
[Gary:] Hanging from his fucking dick
[Phil:] dick, going along and sing
[Gary:] fucking monkey, yeah
[Julie:] [reading] How long was Errol Flynn's nob reputed to be to the nearest inch?
[Gary:] They say he was a big boy don't they?
[Julie:] Fifteen inches []
[Gary:] No fucking hell it's not he's
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] he sat there he's going, no it's not [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] They reckon he was a big boy though don't they?
[Julie:] [reading] Twelve inches or eight inches []?
[Phil:] Eight, no, no it's not, it's erm... ha... it's the first one eight
[Julie:] No it's twelve
[Gary:] It's fucking twelve
[Phil:] Twelve
[Gary:] they reckon he had a big dick didn't he?
[Julie:] That was the C did you want that?
[Gary:] Cos every time he was fucking
[Phil:] No
[Gary:] Robin Hood and [singing] Robin Hood, Robin Hood riding through the twang []
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] it was bad fucking balls
[Phil:] Gal you need this one to match
[Julie:] Oh god here we go
[Shelly:] Oh dear
[speaker004:] ......
[Julie:] This time next week lad you'll be at nanny's, you've got to be a good boy
[Shelly:] Oh yeah it's party innit?
[Julie:] Yeah
[speaker004:] ...
[Julie:] Hope Terry and Kath will be here
[Shelly:] Who?
[Julie:] My cousin, I hope they come down
[Phil:] These are both fucking easy, you should get, you should get this anyway
[Gary:] You wanna fucking bet? I can't get, I can't get the easy ones, I get the hard ones...
[Phil:] [reading] What happens to a male bee after he mates with the queen? He mates with another male bee, his nob gone
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] He can't say it now
[Phil:] his, his nob drops off [LAUGHTER] and then he dies, he has the bees equivalent of a cigarette []?
[Julie:] The bee's equivalent of the cigarette
[Gary:] B
[Shelly:] B yeah
[Phil:] Yeah alright
[Shelly:] his nob drops off and he dies
[Gary:] yeah
[Phil:] yeah right
[Julie:] I knew that but I didn't know if he did
[Phil:] this one, this was other one [reading] what has Cher got tattooed on her backside? A pink
[Gary:] A rose
[Phil:] a pink shuff shuffalot, lent or something
[Julie:] Sheverlay innit a plant?
[Phil:] the words Son Sonny side up []
[Gary:] Sunny yeah, sunny I think
[Phil:] or sunny, yeah
[Julie:] sunny
[Gary:] Sunny
[Phil:] right, [reading] or butterfly with a flower []?
[Shelly:] Butterfly and a plant
[Julie:] Butterfly and a plant
[Phil:] Yeah
[Gary:] Butterfly as well is it? I knew it was a flower, I said rose didn't I? I haven't got that one did I?
[Phil:] No you haven't got that one, see, that comes in handy, now you've got ten you've got to get rid of one have you?
[Shelly:] Yeah, you need two
[Phil:] You need to have
[Shelly:] As
[Phil:] you don't need an, that E, one of these you can chuck
[Shelly:] Phillip
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] Well they swap don't they
[Phil:] and er one of them
[Julie:] so he knows
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] mainly what he's got
[Phil:] one of them
[Gary:] Mm
[Julie:] so that's gotta go on the bottom has it?
[Gary:] hang on
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] hang on
[Julie:] Oh
[Gary:] yeah
[Julie:] yeah?
[Phil:] So you've got sex
[Gary:] hang on, yeah
[Phil:] so you've got the sex and you've got, you need an N, that's all you need innit?
[Shelly:] You don't want to say it out loud Phil cos if I have to swap one of my cards I'm not gonna give him an N
[Phil:] Oh you need another S
[Gary:] Whatever you say then Phil
[Shelly:] Your turn to read
[Phil:] you haven't got an N
[Gary:] [reading] Give a player to your right one []
[Phil:] You can have my card
[Gary:] what? Give a player to your right one...
[Shelly:] You don't swap he, he gives you one...
[Phil:] There's nothing that I want though for spare, cos I've probably got it
[Gary:] Tough titties...
[Shelly:] Swap your card with the player to your left
[Julie:] Mm...
[Gary:] [reading] Swap one card with the player to your left []
[Julie:] Was it?
[Shelly:] Mm
[Phil:] Somewhere, swap another card, oh
[Gary:] What?
[Phil:] you've got to swap one to the left, Shell
[Gary:] Fucking hell
[Phil:] you've still got nine though haven't you?
[Julie:] Yeah he should have cos he swapped one with you ain't he?
[Phil:] No he just had to give me one
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] You're not my type darling
[Julie:] Oh yeah he did
[Phil:] I've got two of them, three of them
[Gary:] Wait, change hands, swap all your cards with the player of your choice
[Julie:] Oh bloody hell
[Phil:] You might as well swap with me I've got the most
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] How many have you got?
[Phil:] One, two, three, four, five
[Julie:] Phil's got hundreds, I've only got four
[Phil:] six, seven, eight
[Julie:] and mine aren't even
[Gary:] How many you've got?...
[Shelly:] Five
[Gary:] How many you've got?
[Julie:] Four... bloody hell, are you feeling alright?
[Shelly:] He reckons he's gonna answer more questions than you
[Phil:] Your go still?
[Gary:] Yeah
[Phil:] Swap it
[Shelly:] Now swap your cards, [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Erm you've just swapped your cards too, swap your cards to the player on your left
[Julie:] Shell
[Shelly:] Oh god, I ain't got
[Phil:] No, what
[Julie:] No... I need two
[Phil:] How many cards you've got altogether?
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
[speaker004:] [reading] How long was Napoleon's penis measured to be after his death? A, six inches, B, twelve inches or C, one inch []? Who's
[Shelly:] Twelve inches
[Julie:] One inch [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] shrivel don't it?
[Gary:] Shrivels when you're dead you soft cow
[Shelly:] Oh does it? Oh god Phillip
[Phil:] If you go in the freezer
[Shelly:] there's no point when you die, there's no point in me [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] if you go in a freezer and it shrivels so then if you go in the fridge
[Shelly:] And when you go down the aqua slide
[Phil:] you've gotta
[Shelly:] in Spain it shrivels doesn't it dear? [LAUGHTER]
[Phil:] Sticks out more
[Gary:] when you, when you used to go down the beach and do fucking moonies with all the you can't find it [LAUGHTER]...
[Phil:] Come on, we're gonna have to hurry up
[Gary:] I'll give my wife a chance thank you dear thank you dear
[Shelly:] [reading] What is a seventy eight?
[Gary:] next to Friday
[Phil:] After seventy nine, one, two, three, four, seventy nine
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]...
[Gary:] It's not though
[Shelly:] a Victorian tin miner, a prostitute term for a client who's quick to come, a sixty nine [LAUGHTER] for on the side on []?
[Julie:] B
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Gary:] Well done darling that's your winner innit?
[speaker004:] Had to be didn't it?
[Julie:] Yeah
[Gary:] That's all you need now innit?
[Julie:] No
[Phil:] Shit
[Julie:] you're wrong I still need two letters
[Gary:] What let what's that?
[Julie:] I
[Shelly:] How many cards have you got now, nine innit?
[Julie:] Yeah
[Phil:] Yeah, she don't give them away on that
[Julie:] got the nine... oh [reading] who said they were less worried about dying than about sex after death? Dave Allen, Peter Sellers, Berk and Hair...
[Phil:] Who the fuck's Berk and Hair?
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] I don't know []
[Phil:] I'll give a guess at him though
[Julie:] No A, Dave Allen, you didn't want that one anyway
[Phil:] What was that?
[Julie:] A... or did you?
[Phil:] Yeah I did tell you the truth
[Julie:] Oh did you?
[Phil:] Mm, I want another A, I don't want any fucking more Ms, A...
[speaker004:] Turn that other glass drink it, I've got to drink this down, oh I won't do another thing
[Gary:] No, I've got
[Shelly:] Can you re-visit?
[Gary:] No I don't think so
[Julie:] Who's nicked my cards then?
[speaker004:] Nobody, you must of taken then with, oh you've put them in your pocket did you?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Trust us like mad
[speaker004:] Oh yeah
[Julie:] You know what I've got anyway
[Shelly:] Your turn Phil
[speaker004:] Yeah I do
[Julie:] Is it for me Phil this one is it?
[speaker004:] Yeah...
[Shelly:] Ah come on
[Phil:] Shell would know this one
[Julie:] Being easy is no good to me though
[speaker004:] [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] So
[Phil:] [reading] Who said I thought
[Julie:] I've got three now ain't I?
[Phil:] of losing my virginity as a career move? Madonna, Clive James or Miriam Stoppard []?
[Julie:] Miriam Stoppard
[Phil:] No
[Shelly:] Madonna
[Julie:] Madonna
[Phil:] Yes...
[Shelly:] Yeah that's obvious, she's a fucking sex maniac
[Phil:] Yeah, mm, mm well... quite an easy one that...
[Julie:] What about is it then?
[Phil:] that's easy that one as well, fucking hell both of these are easy
[Julie:] Erm
[Phil:] both of these are easy
[Shelly:] Go on
[Gary:] What do you need?
[Shelly:] Quite a few [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Good, I don't know which one to go for...
[Phil:] rave up do you?
[Gary:] Eh? [reading+laughing] The condom is a name [reading] the condom is named after A, single people living in condominium, B, the man who invented it Doctor Condom or C the Egyptian word for testings []
[Shelly:] B
[Gary:] Yeah, you've got A, A, er that one as well [reading] what is a hermaphrodite or whatever it is? A half man, half women, a man with two penises, a Greek goddess of love []
[Julie:] a Greek goddess of love
[Shelly:] A
[Phil:] B
[Gary:] Half man, half woman yeah
[Julie:] Oh
[Gary:] er something like that's yours
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] have a card
[Julie:] Oh thank you very much
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [yawning] Oh dear you've got it []...
[Shelly:] Oh you've got to put one back now ain't you?
[Phil:] Get rid of one that you don't want, don't forget there's two As in maniacs
[Julie:] I don't have
[Gary:] she gets
[Phil:] that's alright
[Gary:] Ain't you?
[Julie:] go to school, should of gone to King's Head
[Phil:] Do you need one letter or two letters then?
[Julie:] Two still
[Shelly:] [reading] How many nipples did Anne Boleyn have?
[Phil:] This one's easy
[Shelly:] One, two or three []?
[Julie:] Three
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Phil:] That's, that's easy
[Shelly:] how the hell do you have three nipples?
[Phil:] that's easy
[Gary:] Two on one tit I'd expect
[Julie:] I've got to get rid of another card now haven't I?
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] I don't want that one either
[Phil:] You're winning now babe, come on
[Julie:] Oh shit I want this one [LAUGHTER] this is to you, no mm, [reading] what is wet wear? Adult nappies, water resistant erotic computer games or novel about arti [], oh god, [reading] a novel about artificial intelligence []...
[Gary:] C
[Phil:] B
[Shelly:] B
[Julie:] C, have you got it? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
[Shelly:] You counted two instead of one then, I mean one instead of two
[Julie:] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, how many have you got now?
[Shelly:] Have you got it all?
[Julie:] No I ain't got sex, I ain't got S, change
[speaker004:] ...
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] That's it fucking did get a decent hand
[Julie:] You'll go again Phil
[Phil:] I've got two fucking Es that I have
[Gary:] Bad tempered that, bad tempered person here...
[Julie:] How many have I got?
[Phil:] You don't need this fucking one
[Julie:] He could of swapped with me
[Phil:] Not unless you want four Ms if you've got nine you can have
[Shelly:] He had to swap with the person on his left didn't he?
[Julie:] Oh yeah, I still need bloody two
[Shelly:] Come on Phil you've gotta read a question
[Phil:] Yeah I've gotta find a question... [reading] who condemned the war between the sexes as being just a joke? Clive James, Bonnie and Clyde, George Orwell []
[speaker004:] Just guess
[Gary:] Clive James
[Phil:] Wrong
[Shelly:] C
[Phil:] B, George Orwell
[Shelly:] Yeah cos you've never heard of him [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] Who's the bloke Clive James?
[Shelly:] Clive James is the one who does that
[Julie:] He knows who Clive James is
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER] Dick shit
[Phil:] How comes I get down to four then?
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER]
[speaker004:] ...
[Phil:] change cards to the person to your right, that's you...
[Julie:] They've got some boots in
[Phil:] can I just
[Julie:] black one erm
[Phil:] Go on can I just have a look
[speaker004:] with like, well like my browny ones really, but
[Julie:] [reading] Which actress has reputed to have eaten garlic before doing love scenes for, with her leading man? A, Diana Rigg, James Bond movie, B, Kathleen Turner, Crimes of Passion, C, Kim Basinger, Basinger in Eight and a Half Weeks []
[Shelly:] Kim Basinger
[Julie:] A, Diana Rigg, James Bond movie
[speaker004:] they've got like erm, laces up the back
[Shelly:] Yeah
[Julie:] that you do up, nine ninety nine
[Shelly:] the sizes though, they usually only have them in about a three and a four don't they?
[Julie:] They had four and fives
[Shelly:] How much were they?
[speaker004:] Nine ninety nine
[Julie:] You'll have them back in a minute what you done with them?
[Gary:] Put them in order for me
[Julie:] All you need is
[Shelly:] [LAUGHTER] Oh how sick
[Julie:] [LAUGHTER] [reading] Who described sex as five minutes of squelching? [LAUGHTER]
[Shelly:] Oh my god
[Gary:] [LAUGHTER]
[Julie:] Sid Vicious []
[Gary:] You only have to talk quietly, it comes out so well doesn't it?
[Phil:] Stephanie... Stephanie
[Julie:] Why hello there
[Gary:] Come on Vicki darling come to daddy, good girl, Vicki, come on let's dance, come and sit with daddy we'll dance, yeah, come here
[speaker004:] What happened to the tea towel?
[Gary:] What tea towel? It's on top of the fridge
[speaker004:] Can you
[Gary:] it's on
[speaker004:] tidy up some of this then? Cos I
[Gary:] why it's up on top of the fridge
[Phil:] Oh
[Gary:] Clifford, say hello, hello mummy
[Vicki:] Hello mummy, Shell
[Gary:] and Aunty Shell and Uncle Phil
[Vicki:] Hiya
[Gary:] Uncle Phil, no you don't want to eat it
[Vicki:] Hello
[Gary:] hello, don't eat it
[Vicki:] hello
[Gary:] hello
[Vicki:] hi
[Gary:] yeah
[Vicki:] it's er Gary
[Gary:] Yeah, you can't hear nothing you idiot, go on then, okay let go, let go
[Phil:] Do it again
[Gary:] Good girl
[Vicki:] Daddy
[Gary:] up you get