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Iiow TO GIT A LOAN OUT OF TnR u.
MON BANK I'VE have heard much com
plaint of tho partiality and injustice Of
this institution, in the distribution of its
loans. Perhapsa hint ortwo to our friend.
who wish to borrow may be of service. In
the first place, it is necessary that all ap-
pllcants should abuse CIV. McNutt in good
round terms. lie must be cursed with nc
measured denunciaiion. You must have
no conscientious scruples about profane
swearing.


In the next place, YOU must take an
oath that every thing the Union Bank has
done was right, that the directory are the
wisest men living, and that overy man
who doubts it is fool and ought to be be-
headed


In the third place, you must produce n
certificate from the sheriff of your county
that you are insolvent, and will be sold
out in twenty days if you don't get a loan.
If you are in good credit you cannot be
accommodated These are the 3 grand
essentials which are indispensable. Then
there are several other things which
should be thrown in by the way of soft
corn For instance, you ought to humble
yourself before each directory when you
meet him out. You should always make
very low bow. You should tell him that
be is the handsomest man, the cleverest
man, and the greatest man living. Call
him the Biddle Of the Union Bank. Sew
eral of the directory are ambitious of be
ing gallants you should insnuate that
they are irresistible among the ladies.--
Above all, you should make up a poor
mouth, tell of your wants, beg and suppli-
cate humbly, and then, perhaps, you may
get that which you are entitled to as
right Mississippiaa.