

"variety is the spice of life. /"
{"newspaper_name": "The Washingtonian.", "edition": "01", "page": "p3", "byline": ""}
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Southern Adonis, no way celebrated for |
his personal attractions, on completing a some |
what protracted toilet one morning, turned to !
his servant and inquired:


"How do / look Casar?n


"Plendid, massa, plendid;" was ebony's |
delighted answer.


Do you think I'll do, Casar?" Giving him
piece of silver.)


Guy, massa, nebber see you look so fierce
in all my life; you look jist as bold as lion."
Why, what do you know about lion?
you never saw one, Cesar"


"Nebber see lion, massa! Guy, see
massa Peyton's Jim riding one ober to de mill
ebery day."


No, you fool, that's donkey"
| "Can't help dat, massa-you look jis like
him"


Land ',ear-"Can you see land?" inquired
one of party, who, from birth, had Stunned
the acquaintance Of soap and water.
| Yes, Stree" replied wag, Withdrawing
his eyes from the encircling horizon, and pla-
cing them on the interrogator-"Y Yes, sir,
see your face" @t
The animated dirt mizzled.
The rum bottle is the devils crucible, in
which he melts down all the fine gold of mans
nature.
The Temperance people Of Doylestown, Pa,
have organized stock company-shares five
dollars each-to establish a Temperance house
in that place. A most excellent move.
| ARich Town.-New Bedford contains $4,000
inhabitants, and it's valuation $l2,0OOOOO, be-
ing $l 900 to each man, woman, and child.
| An inebriate of Philadelphia, named McA.
nnlly, on Wednesday, so injured his wife by
beating, that she was taken to the hospital,
and he then attempted to cut his own throat,
IN which ne was very nearly successful.
| A lo,o bred Wonaan-One who stays at
home, takes care of her children, and never
NEEDLES with the business of her neighbors
Species almost extinct.
| sailor being summoned to give testimony
before, court, was questioned by the judges
as to his religious creed:


Are you an Episcopalian?"


"A Catholic!"


"No, SIR"


! "a Methodist"


"No, SIR"


What are you, then?"


I'm captain of the foretop, sir"
BUTCHER KILLED HMsELF.-A butcher in
Fulton Market, New York, on Saturday night
about o'clock, was cutting piece of meat,
when his cleaver slipped from the block and
glanced into his body, in the lumbar region.
He ran for physician, but before he reached
the house, he fell dead. The name of the un-
fortunate person was John Van Rapp.
| The Cleveland Herald, in giving an account
OF public execution, states that "hundreds
were present in women's Clothes" Never was
! there more deserved sarcasm.
| man tried to pawn his wife the other day
for half dollar. Mr.. Monevman told him he
had better take her to a junk shop, and sell
her for old junk.


Great Mechanical Derterity-It is stated of
tailor, named Metzgar, residing in flourish.
ing inland town of PENNSYLVANIA, that in one
day, from from sunrise till eight o'clock, P. M.
he made eleven pairs of pantaloons, two waist
coats, and round jacket for a little boy. He
was obliged to keep bowl of ice-water con-
stantly by him to cool his needle in. Deci.
dedly the fshiest yet.


The Cincinnati Enquirer says. an old man,
aged sixty, on the canal, was knocked down
and kicked by drunken son, against whose
evil practices he was demonstrating.


The same paper furnishes the following:
SHOCKING oh God! let me go home TO my
CHn0 was tue exCldIndtOn lndt rang In our
ears night before last on Sth street, in the loud
and clear notes Of woman's voice. Some
poor creature was in the hands of the watch
men, ,swho had found her wandering in the rain,
realing under the effects Of liquor, and unwil-
| ling to be conducted to her abandoned home
and family. She showed the vestiges Of fine
looking woman, and was, as she declared, the
mother Of three small children. Probably a
once happy wife and mother depraved-a
husband aienated-a home desolated-
dren beggared-but how can all this be help
ed! the city must hare rerenue!
In mandatory in France, they are now
making glass pipes for the conveyance of
water, which will cost nearly 80 per cent. less
than iron pipes now used and will bear far
greater external pressure.


The editor Of Buckeye paper has been
threatened with Aogging. He very quietly
intimates that he may be found up stairs, and
that 1t is "but forty feet to the bottom"
Daguerre, through whose inventive genius
perfect face is transcribed in, a few seconds of
time, has discovered metlsod Of making trees
only three months old bear fsut.


WoMAN.--A mother, she cherishes and cor
rects US; sister, she consults and counsels
US; sweetheart, she coquettes and charms
U.S. wife, she comforts and confides in us |
without her, what would become of us!


A man by the name of Bliss, lately stole