{"newspaper_name": "New-York daily tribune.", "edition": "01", "page": "pNone", "byline": ""}
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fore and ait Sometimes the nat rose up III pl /
amidal majesty; sometimes II was shut IN IKE a
telescope wanting to be pulled out And then
every kind of fancy man had q fancy nat there
was the Neck nothing hat, the Bang-up, Tue
Corinthian, the Jerry and the Logic; or else DIS
tinguished leaders OF the ton lent their names 10
it. and we had the Peiershams, the barFngtons,
&c. Through every degree OF aosurdltv mas the
chapedu r0nd passed, until II seems to have SET
tied down into that quiescent state OF fhedlocrH
which marks the decline OF empires and OF mats.
The brm is no longer only halt an inch broad as
il was once, nor four inches as we also remem-
Der it, it seems 10 vary between the limits OF one
inch and two-a breadth Just sutilclent 10 lei ue
line of shade, when the head Is erect, come upon
the eyelids, and just sufficient to clear the cars
Bnt if the head be moved ever so little, or II the
rain come down ever 50 s!anungy the services
OF the hat are at end II Is well enough 10 H.
tercept anything coming down perpendlcularly,
but " slaniendiculary, as Trend sick says-no.
lis present height is just enough to prevent your
wearing il in carriage, and such, too as 10 give
a moderate wind good puachase upon II: the
substance is such that the least exposure TO wet
ruins il. whether of beaver or silk; moderate
blow will crack or break its form and for the
first week, if YOU have anything like sensitive



ing from your Uranium, you are doomed TO inces
SAINT headaches from hat-pinchinss. II has 10
properties Of usefulness to recommend it, and
none of ornament, saving this-if it can be called
such-the being an invaluable appendage for a
little man to make himself appear tall What
wide interval from the simplicity OF It's Phrygian
original.


Having, therefore, criticised our present head
al hats IuithpjIt Duup
them TO pieces, led us inquire what proper COW
ering for the head should be: first of all i'll point
of usefulness, and next in point OF comely ap-
pearance. But let no man vainly imagine that
we expect TO suit the fancics OF all the creatures
privileged 10 wear hats or even TO cover their
heads we do not pretend % invent, or decide
upon, any one given type or form OF head-dress.
So many are the wants of a man III covering his
head, so widely differing from each other are the
exiaencies of different people, that uniformity IN
hats is to be given up as bad Job: 10 attempt 1t
would foil the strength OF Hercules the utmost
we can hope to effect is 10 lay down certain Inn
its for the variations of this apex OF human pride


For us, then. who live in a climate rainy, WIN
do, hot and cold, all within any twenty-Our
hours Of the year, Just as the case may be, 1t Is
plain that we want for general use something
that will be proof against the atmospherical accl-
dents that may bcfa any man who goes abroad
to take the air. And here let ii be observed,
that in reasoning about hats, all thoughts about
that effeminale invention, the umbrella, are 10 be
laid aside This u,ensil is truly disgrace 10 the
manhood of the times and lis existence, by al
lowing people to dispense with warm cioaks and
other anti-ran appliances, has caused more dis
ease, in letting them catch cold, than anything
else we know Of Our stalwart ancestors did ad-
mrabv well without umbrellas they wore good
cloaks or coats, and broad beavers to keep the
rain out of their necks, aring not jot the worse
for it. Umbrellas are only lit for n-mliliners,
Cockney travellers and women. The nature OF
a hat, we flatter ourselves, is something independ
cnt of cotton and whalebonc; and instead OF the
umbrella claiming precedence over the hat, the
hat, we take 1t, should he above the umbrella
An Englshman's hat, then, should be something
that will keep the rain off his face and neck
when the weather is bad and shield his eyes
from the glare of the sun on the few days when
sunlight is oppressive-and these two require
mens settle AT once, OH all principles OF common
sense, that man, ii he has only one kind ot COW
cring for the head, should have n hat with broad
brim. This is the very foundation OF the dellnl-
ton OF an useful hat, providing tha; hat is really
TO be the thing worn for protecting mans upper
story. Usefulness will also decide against height
in the crown. Cui B0no this same high crown
of ours, that looks more like a watering-pot de-
prived OF lis spout and handle than reasonable
article Of human apparel Down with the
crowns, say We. II you will wear a hat, down
with your crown. You may put down your halt
sovereign or sovereign, or Whatever you please,
for your new hat first OF all, but down with your
crown too. Here, gentle reader, you VIII eN-





claim against our taste, and will protest that we
would sacrifice everything 10 tlathorrld unitarian
principle, which opposes all ideas oi beauty and
poetry. We are free TO confess that, IN our opln-
ION, there is not much poetry 10 be made about
such sublcct-uncss some obsolete verses, " All
round my hat" may be alleged 10 the contrary ::
but as for the beauty of the head piece, we pro-
test that admit lis existence, and think that 1t
should be consulted by whomsocver would pay
proper attention to his own outward appearance.
The merely useful may possibly make the shape
approximate TO that OF Quakers or Jarvey $,
but the beautiful has to elevate and modify it into
the mystical proportions iii for man Of TASTE
One other quality, however, which is intiRlately
connected with the useful. has to be noticed.
The substance should not be hard and unyield-
ing Witness, ye reminiscences-ye painful! ina
ges of bvgone headachs, even yet fitting through
our brain like Titanic thundcrbolts accused
be the memory of that fellow Tightfit in Old
Bond Street who used to screw his hats on our
Uranium when we were young, and ere London
had awakened us, As you value your comfort,
dear reader, never purchase hard hat. a hard
heart may be borne with, but hard hat-never
And last of all, {; hat should be light-yes, the
lighter the better-ight as gossamer web though
'tis simie that will not bear stretching. lou
NAV have the msloruns TO be 4 heavy headed
man. but DO not add TO it that of being heavy
hated Avoid the extremity Of suffering; and
observe the climax of i'll from which we would
shield your head-a narrow brimmed, hard, hea-
Wy high-crowned hat


-odc, yao Bporois psy,orOY qA0e7 es es0Y sas0'


The covering of the head, then, must have lis
usefulness made ornamental. il not beautiful, and
the due ornamentaton OF it will depend pTlnci-
pay upon lis form, but also upon It's color ana
material Now. form is the principal thing; every
one that has half an eye for art will tell You tins
It's an admitted axiom. Either, then, the shape
OF the covering should conform TO that OF the