CERTAINLY A ,PREDICAMENT,
{"newspaper_name": "The North-Carolina standard.", "edition": "01", "page": "p1", "byline": ""}
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A few nights since, says an Albany paper, d
tali, eccentric parsonage was observed by The ten.
ants Of the cabin Of one of the Albany boats TO
perform sundry strange eVoiutions garnishcd BY
variety of hops, skips, and jumps, which belo+
kened any thing but a sane mind in The performer.
The movements of this parsonage betrayed tron-
bic and pain, and they were at last so perfectly
distressing TO the behoders that consultation was
held and coinmittce of three appointed to inquire
into the cause of the Strangers unaccountable
movements With due caution tho deputies ap4
preached their man, while the others gathered
around within earshot to witness whatever "tale"
might be "unfolded" The committee stated their
reasons for troubling him with what might be-
deemed impertinent intcrrogatories and concluded
their remarks by requesting to know the reuSono Of
his apparent perplexity, and whether or not they
could render him any aid.
"WalI," said the stranger, who was Yankee,
and who spoke in the most solemn accent, while
bis face evinced deal Of pcnt-up sorrow, I" Wall,
don't know but you might help fellow little.
Pm in heap Of pain-bothercd like sixty. I'm
| in predicament"


The ears Of the entire party were distended, and
mouths pcrceptibly parted 10 wonder width. ~


In predicament" said one of the trio, spray
what is it2 We feel desirous of alleviating any
misfortune that may have befalIen you"


"Thal's clever" said the Yankee. "Wull.
may be none of you was ever kicked by a hoss?"


All admitted that they had escaped such ca.
lamity.


d" Nor bit by spider 2"


No one pleaded guilty


" Nor chased by rattlesnake q


No-unanimously.


= " Nor been caught in thunder shower with
gal, and felt mcaneF AN thunder ?"


Not man in the assembly had experienced
that mishap.
4" Wall, my prcdicamcnt is worse, calculate,
than any of them" ts


Do tell us what it is" was the earnest re-
quest of very respectable clergyman.


+" Wall, gents, rather guess will The sole
Of my right foot itches like sin can't get off
nv boot TO scratch it,"


The cabin was cleared in about The spaee Of a
minute.


We heard the following "good un " the other
day A tall gawky Yankee sauntered into a rooFA
where some half a dozen girls had assembled,
smoking "long ninr," made of rotten tobacco.
and after putting awhile inquired if they liked
smoking By acclamaiion the girls replied No,
we don't" "UmphI'' said the Yankee, ga
good many people DON'T" and he kept on smolt-
ing. Western Spy


We have read, frequently, an onecdotc equal to
the above. An old salt, just returned from long
cruise, roaming at large, full Of fun and froic,
in one of the Eastern cities. Tired Of footing his
way along tho pavement, he got into an omnibus
Afer seating himself he pulled out a long nine,
lit it with match, and looking around upon his
lfellow-passrngcrs remarked: May be smoking
is disagreeabIe 10 youq p "Yesr "ycsl" "yesp
Immediately responded several men "Well IL IS
10 some folks," replied old SALT and he whitfield a.
way with renewed energy. Mash. Gazette.