{"newspaper_name": "The Columbian fountain.", "edition": "01", "page": "p1", "byline": ""}
{"character_count": 959, "word_count": 168, "ccnet_language_score": [0.9233999848365784], "ccnet_perplexity": [802.2999877929688], "fasttext_language": ["en"]}
WANTED, 375 young men, of all shapes
and sizes, from the tall graceful dandy, with
hair enough on bis upper works to stuff a
barber's cushion, down to the little hump
backed, freckle-faced, bow-legged, carrot
head upstart. The object is to form a
gaping corps to be in attendance at the va
rious church doors in this city on each
Sabbath before the commencement of di-
vine service, to stare at females as they en-
ter, and make gentlemanly and delicate re-
marks upon their persons and dress. All
those who wish to enlist in the above corps
will please appear at the chuhrch doors
next Sabbath morning, where they viii! be
duly inspected, and their names, personal
appearance, and quantity of brains register
ed in book kept for that purpose, and pub
lished in the newspapers. To prevent ge-
neral rush it would be well to state, that
none will be enlisted who possess intel
lectua capacity above those Of an ordinary
well bred donkey.


RECRUITING SERGEANT.