From the London Magazine,
CAI.ANlTIES OF LONDON.
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No t,oubtthere are plenty of them, enough
70 make a most luguhrious article tor hea-
w magazine, or a serious period'cai: res
,erdav morning, as Mr.. and Mrs. lomkins,
with their youngest child, we're proceeding
in their gig towards Clapton, just as they


were, syc--"Last night an alarm OF hre


broke out in the premises OF oh


Monday about ten o'clock in the morning,
the scaffoid erected in front OF Mr.. lturke's


house, Oxford street, gave way wheh
shocking TO relate ."--Such arc the melan-
choly paragraphs which meet our eyes cv-
ery morning at the breakfast table, inter-


.persed with fashionable intelligence, 10


cose police reports, Lord Norbury's luries,
and the sparkling effusions OF CharIcs
Wrght's poetry. But these are not the ca :
lsmities which are the present SUBJECT OF
complaint; neither are they the endurance
of London in September, nor one OF its logs
in November; nor the want ct an invitaton
to dinner, nor of hackney coach to so 10
one in a shower of rain nor the losing your
snuff-bo at crowded theatre; nor your
pocket handkerchief. after taking pinch
which is Just as bad; though these ihaeeo'
NAV be calamities to excite Mr.. Iesty's IT.
ritation or Mr.. Sensitve's spleen. The ca
/ lamities now to be complained OF are OF a
! more SSrlOuS HilNii bue ehNy


door calamities, and will be immediately
recognized as vexing evils, besetting all IN
/ every street of the town, only to be remedi-
| ed by the immediate and the vigorous inter
! ference of the laws strong arm. 1t may
not be pleasant to be thrown from gis, or


ne burnt to death by fire; but it is lesser


evil (certainly it is more harrassing ana soul
distraCting> to have ane's walks intercepted
and ones thoughts interrupted, any where


within a quarter OF mile ct either OF the
Theatres. and about the hours OF five, SIX or


seven in the afternoon. by set OF ragged


BOYS and shirtless idlers, who press upon


YOU, bore you, importunc you, follow you the


whole length of the street, screaming N


YOUR ears the reiterated, unqueli6le request
to "buy bill of the play" las VAN &c


saw YOU are not going; vain to tell a lie, ane


say YOU have got one; equally vain to kick


strike, or swear at them, push one away


and another succeeds like the heads OF the


HYDRA. Conceiving that prudential and eco


nomical motives alone prevent your Pur'


chasing their damp and dirty scraps, they
enforce their thirty-times urged request, bl


the assurance that it is only benny. WITT
quickened pace, and sickened visagc, ant
hand constantly feeling to see it your pock


ct et-handkerchef is safe, you at last escap
from the CALLING running fire OF this scuf
fling crew. You find yourself now perhap
i in the Strand, and wish to cross over to tn
other side; the street is hlthily muddy, ou
| you dare not take advantage OF the clean'