Question: What do you do with a 17 year old girl who got her GED 1 year early and now wants to do whatever she pleases? My daughter is 17 years old.  She earned her GED this summer.  She has no job and hasn't attempted to look for a job in the last few months.  Yet now she has decided she is grown and should be able to do whatever she wants.  Example includes - spending the night with her boyfriend at his mother's home.  When I say "No" then she is "moving out".  I don't want her to move out yet but I can't go on like this.  Any advice?

Answer: Well, you've got to make a decision and stick by it.  Ever heard of "tough love".   This sounds like my daughter at 17.  From experience, let her go.  If that's what she really wants.  What you are allowing her to do is called legal blackmail and you are not teaching her any values at all by allowing her to get away with this.  She's smart.  She knows how to work you and push all the right buttons.  You better for her own good stop using your heart to make your decisions and use your brain and do what's right for her..........  Give her a deadline to get a job.  If she is so bent on moving out,  LET HER GO!  You want her to be a viable adult, then she needs to learn.  SInce she thinks she's grown, let her be grown.   She needs to get a job and pay you rent. Or, get a job and get her own place and move out.  This will teach her some responsibility which is what she is lacking at the moment.  You have contributed to this.  You need to help her and yourself.  As long as you continue to go the way you are going, nothing is going to change.  One more thing, how did you put yourself in the position of her not having any respect for you?  Do you have a husband.  Where is her father or does he not help. I had no one and I made the same mistakes you are making.  It was a disaster. \n There is way more going on here than meets the eye with you.  Continue to make yourself the door mat and life will do nothing except get worse as you will have taught her nothing; or stop it and make the change no matter how much it hurts to do it.\nYou will help yourself and most especially your daughter.
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