[Name] Holovirus [Source] Red Dwarf: Quarantine [Symptoms] 
Discovered, contracted and possibly created by viral researcher Hildeguard Lanstrom, this nasty condition can only be passed between holograms. It can be transmitted across radio-waves and drains the victim's life-force while endowing them with powers such as telepathy, telekinesis and hex-vision. The sufferer tends to go insane long before his or her demise. Suggested treatment: A remote link to the hologram disk projection system, a detachable power transfer adapter capable of holding spikes of up to five million volts, and a B47/7RF resistor. Plus confiscation of equally deranged penguin glove-puppet