where in the south i ask as somebody who was raised in the south heres my own personal anecdote im black my family is black and most of my friends are black presumably i would here the word nigger thrown around by friends and enemies alike but that was not my case the only people who actually said the word in regular conversation werent black and they were always upset at not being able to say it like other terms of endearment those that spit the word as an insult didnt care so that begs the question why do you care so much about using that word when you have alternatives like dude or bro why use the word when it can easily be conflated with the insular connotation that racists use