it would be awkward if you had to grab someones crotch in order to figure out which pronoun to use so we align pronouns with two things what the person asks us refer to them as they do this through employing what amount to stereotypes associated with a gender and then we use the corresponding pronoun we assume sex and use the pronoun we are comfortable using this being considered rude by many eg if you see a tranny woman you might call her him because youre not comfortable with the obviousness of the transition theyve made i believe that if some asks me to call them jane i call them jane even if i might want to call them lisa or joe same for pronouns the labeled gets to determine the labelnot the labeler