words like this have a really complicated history and its hard to figure out what to do with them and i think its best to let the targeted group make this decision for themselves some groups have decided hate words like kike and chink need to be totally thrown out other groups have tried to reclaim hate words like queer and some other lgbt slurs nigger is kind of in the middle it has in some ways been reclaimed by its community but it still carries a hateful tinge when used in the wrong context as a nonblack person i think its most respectful to just stay away from it and not include in your parlance with others