I’m 14 almost 15, I’ve been depressed since about 11, but it got a lot worse when I was 13, and has only gotten worse since then, I’ve been self-harming on and off since 10 and right now everyone thinks I’m clean but I’m not. My anxiety has been through the roof and it’s nearly impossible to socialize or leave the house without being on the verge of a panic attack and not be able to move or speak at all. I’ve been on antidepressants since October 2020, celexa for a majority of the time and I’ve been on Zoloft for about two months, neither have worked at all. I am constantly exhausted but force myself to do stuff so my parents think I’m fine because if I don’t clean my dishes or make food they call me lazy which doesn’t help. Suicide is constantly on my mind and every morning I wish I hadn’t woken up. I haven’t felt genuinely happy in years and nothing is helping, my physiologist doesn’t do anything and neither does anyone else. I have no one to talk to and I hate feeling like this. I don’t want to hurt my family but living is so horrible I just want to end it