Hiya, I was diagnosed BPD and bipolar II a little over a year ago, and haven't really had anyone to talk to that I feel comfortable with about my mood disorders stuff, especially the BPD, which wasn't something I had ever really known about before being diagnosed. I had always felt things incredibly strongly, shifted moods quickly on a dime, had major abandonment issues, acted impulsively, used sex and weed as a way to cope, and lots of other textbook bpd shit, but had never connected the dots. The past year has been incredibly hard and confusing, full of shit, including my being raped by and allowing myself to be in an incredibly abusive relationship with a man sixteen years older than me for month where I practically lived with the fucker. I was diagnosed with severe PTSD just a few weeks ago from that after having to take over a month off work, where I spent way too much money on drugs and essentially just tried to distract myself from the fact that I had had a major breakdown at work in front of my coworkers, and had recently managed to work up the courage to tell my mom about being assaulted and was now being held more accountable for my mental health and shit. Basically, I'm at a super weird transitional stage right now it feels with all of this, and have been feeling incredibly alone and shitty for trying to reach out to my boyfriend for help understanding my own mental health, but too scared to talk to anyone else. My BPD has been essentially out of control for a month straight now, mood swings all day every day, two meltdowns a day usually, and I have no idea what's happening sometimes and honestly feel like I'm going crazy, my brain can be so far out of my control, it feels like. Basically that's what brings me here. I'm looking for maybe a few people to message about bpd and share stuff about our experiences so that maybe we all can feel a lil less alone. I'm especially looking for people to talk openly with about sex and BPD, as hypersexuality is a huge thing for me, and my therapist doesn't seem super comfortable with me talking about it to her, and I don't really have anyone to talk with openly about experiences with sex and BPD, and have questions about other people's experiences. Let's be honest, I'm looking to feel like I'm a lil less alone, and less like I'm slowly going crazy and am an uncontrollable mess. So... hey? 