Apologies if this is confusing, I’m having an anxiety attack while writing this

Like most people at the start of the pandemic I got sent to wfh, which eventually turned into permanent wfh. I loved it, my job doesn’t involve speaking with people unless it’s on my own time, and I’m only in charge of a handful of people and only deal with the people who need the most help. I got to sink into my own little bubble, and it’s coming back to bite me. I’ve realized my social anxiety has gotten so much worse than it ever has, I have so much fear just speaking to other people that I feel insane acting like this. Recently a promotion became available, and I don’t want to apply. I made the dumb mistake of telling my partner about the opening and he’s pressuring me to do it. I feel physically sick at the idea of doing this. Some of it is because I’m going to be judged, but a lot of it is because I will have to do more in the sense of talking to people. I can’t get away with 3 meetings a month with people I already know, it will be constant employee contact, and even meeting with people I don’t know. I’m stressed. If the pandemic had never happened, I could do it. I use to be able to flick a switch and become a whole different person at work who only had minimal anxiety. Now, because home is work I can’t feel that separation. I try to make my work in a different location within my house but it’s not easy with my house set up. I know I’m going to have to do it whether I want to or not because we need the money and the benefits, also I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I didn’t at least try, but I’m so scared. I’m worried if I do get it that I will be having constant anxiety attacks until I’m use to the job. I just don’t know if I can mentally handle that. I’m worried if I don’t get it I will just be constantly overthinking and causing myself anxiety over not being good enough. It’s a lose lose situation for me, and there isn’t anything I can do. I just want to run away and bury my head in the sand. But I can’t, so I’ll do it knowing the consequences and hope for the best.