I don't really know how to start... 

I don't really expect anyone to read to this, but my life is genuinely shambles. I have massive trust issues, constantly scared, suicidal thoughts, giving up, letting go. Cutting myself from everywhere. Idfk you name it not going to lie.

I feel, one of my only friends, is genuinely slipping away from me, and he's been beckoned over by other people who really really hate me. They always say nasty things behind my back, and genuinely openly express hate that I am there. And the shit they say is genuinely hurtful.

Before any of you say, that I am probably overworrying, or overthinking, or have I tried talking to him. I have seen the comments myself so idrk what to say, and I have talked to him before.... But idk.

If they do make him hate me, at the end, than honestly, and I really mean I'll lose the only friend I actually have. And I am really just not ready to take this world alone again. Really not again.