Does anyone here feel like the world is about to end every time after meeting up with people like friends and colleagues? I feel like talking with people is a difficult thing to do and don’t see the point of it. But there are occasional instances where I’m asked to go somewhere someplace by them and I don’t know what should I say to reject them. 
Plus the work I’m doing right now requires me to meet up with colleagues from time to time and I find it difficult to talk to them because I just can’t be myself and I know they probably don’t like me due to the rumours people have been spreading behind my back. 
I know it’s probably not responsible to resort to substances but i think this is the only thing that is keeping me alive. I don’t even know what I’m thinking or what I want but I just can’t seem to find anyone that I can trust around me to talk about this so I only have this thread to talk about it 😂