
Theres so much going on inside my head, it’s hard to find the right words to express these ugly feelings I get so often. Most of the time I feel like no one cares to hear how I’m feeling so I never speak out on my depression or my bipolar disorder, I bottle up until I’m able to cry alone, feeling completely alone. There’s so much I want to say, so much I wish I had the courage to say but I just can’t.... 


Dealing with mental illness and trying to get out of an abusive relationship is hard, I’m tired... 
all my life its been a cycle, I don’t want to be in this spot anymore. I’m trying and every single time that I try to leave, everything is flipped on me and I’m blamed, I’m told that I'm crazy!? I’m not crazy... I’m depressed, I have trouble dealing with my depression but I stay to myself, I don’t ask anyone for help.
My thoughts, my feelings are always bottled up, I hardly talk as I use too, I try my best to make it seem like if I'm okay, to stay out of people’s way, and im told that IM the crazy one? What more do I have to do to make people see that it’s not me? I’ve been trying so hard to leave, at this point I’m giving up. I’m jus tired. 
Since I was a kid, this is all I’ve ever known. I don’t think I’ll ever get my happily ending, at least not with a partner. I’m so numb, I don’t know what to do anymore.