*Trigger Warning* 

My anxiety has gotten to the point where I can’t handle it for much longer. I don’t control my own life. Its like I’m tied up locked In the trunk while anxiety is behind the wheel. I have no joy in my life. Due to social anxiety I have no one. 21 and never had any sort of relationship. I’ve had few friends, none close enough to share what I’m going through. I’m alone. The only people I can talk to are ones on the internet that don’t know even know my name. Now the trigger warning. Suicide is in the back of my mind all the time, not necessarily because I’m sad and depressed, but because I’m fairly convinced it’s the only way to get rid of this anxiety feeling I have all the time. People in the comments will tell me it will get better. I used to believe that. But I start to believe it less and less each passing day. I have a little bit of fight left in me for now. I don’t want to die. I fantasize that I can live a normal life, find someone I love, be a functioning member in society. But then I remember I can’t even talk to a person without having a panic attack. Im going to keep going for now, but I need to find relief soon.