Hello i apologize i dont normally get on Reddit so this is a throwaway account. I don't think this is something i can bring up with anyone irl. 
To be frank i think it might be possible i was a victim of sexual abuse as a child possibly from a family member and i am repressing the memory. Im not sure who would have done it or when or how but i have a few reasons i think this. (By the way im 19 and female)

To start off here are some reasons why i think something happened 

-i have ptsd over diffrent things that i can remember and i know what triggers me and why but latley i've realized that incest triggers me and i don't know why other than the fact that its disgusting. And when i say triggered i dont mean disgusted i mean i shut down and get really anxious and upset and even have thoughts of self harm (i have a history of self harm but havd been clean for many years) this happened as recently as yesterday (the topic of siblings having a sexual relationship got brought up in a conversation not by me)

-i am female and when i had consensual sex with a guy for the first time it felt... Familiar? Im not sure if thats the right word to use but there are some things where you only know how they feel if you've done them in the past and sex is one of them. When i had sex for the first time i got the feeling like i had done this before even though i dont ever remember anything happening and this has honestly been really bugging me latley.

-i actually have slight very blurry and indistinct memories of being sexually abused as a child but i don't have any proof they happen other than the reasons above, but since false memories are a thing im taking them with a grain of salt.

-i honestly wasn't really sure weather to add this one but i also have memories that i do know are real of me when i was very young and my vagina hurting really badly for no reason. (Sorry this sounds stupid) i remember that i had problems where it would hurt when i peed, but i think its possible i just had a yeast infection but i was like 4-5 years old and it happened a lot so im not sure how that works.

But i also kinda dont think anything happened and heres why

-i have a history of mental illness and mild to moderate delusions although i have not had problems for around 3 years since i started taking medication. Although i just recently had a change to my medication. I am also generally a very paranoid person.

-i also have a history of sexual abuse and harassment that i do know for a fact happened in my early teens and i have ptsd from it however i know what triggers me and incest is not really something i have a reason to be triggered over and i honestly dont know why it does.

I apologize if this is inappropriate in any way this is just something that has really been worrying me latley and i would like to hear some thoughts and opinions from people who do not know me who have had similar experiences. I dont want to bring this up with my therapist because i don't want to seem like im accusing anyone of anything. If anything i kinda just need to get this out to talk about it and process it because its also very possible its my mental illness acting up. 
Thank you for your help and understanding and sorry this post is a mess.