I've been trying for 3 years to see a psychiatrist. 

It was so fucking rushed. I brought up possible ADHD and she's like yeah we can't really diagnose that over the phone. And I'm already on medication that supposedly helps with it but it hasn't.. so pretty much ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

 It was so rushed I didn't even get a chance to bring up BPD. I just wanna know what I fucking have. 

And at the end she said she won't make another appointment with me as she doesn't see a need too. Cause I'm not suicidal and I don't go batshit crazy? It's all internalized. I'm sick of feeling like this and it's impossible to get help.