I've been trying to rewatch shows and moves I used to love when I was younger and new shows I know I would like. But I can barely get past the first episode or two. I'm lonely and depressed, and every time I see a character that kinda reminds me of myself, I have to stop watching. Or if I watch something where a characters are in a happy relationship, I feel shitty about myself.

Another example is I'm a huge history buff. I also love anything involving paleontology. But I can't even watch those types of channels of Youtube anymore. Whenever I do, I start thinking about how those people are living my dream job, and how my lack of self-confidence led me down the completely wrong career path. I'm filled with so much regret that I have to stop watching.