I’m sick of tip-toeing around threads that could even mention BPD, because I know the brigade is coming. The stigma for personality disorders has always been bad, but on reddit it’s particularly vicious and especially for borderlines. I know you know what I’m talking about. Cue the 30+ people chiming with: 

“She’s a borderline fucking run.” 
“Borderlines will ruin your life.” 
“Sounds crazy, probably borderline personality.” 

And I. Am. Sick of it. One mention of BPD and suddenly everyone online has a master’s in psychology (we won’t even get started on the bias in the professional community.) Do they take misdiagnosis into account? No. Of course they don’t. They wouldn’t know BPD is one of the most misdiagnosed disorders because they don’t care to know - they care about giving their abusive ex/friend/parent a box to fit in.

News flash, just because your ex bleached your clothes doesn’t mean he/she had BPD. Maybe your ex was... drum roll... just an asshole. There are those who are abusive who do not have BPD. There are those who are manipulative who do not have BPD. There are those with abandonment issues who do not have BPD. You’ll notice none of these people address symptoms that aren’t volatile, vindictive, or manipulative. Believe it or not, anger is not the only symptom of BPD! Would you believe it, that this very complex disorder includes a whole spectrum of symptoms with varying degrees of severity? 

But they will never focus on that. They will never entertain the idea that borderlines have symptoms other than the ones that directly negatively affect themselves. Why would they? That would obliterate their narrative and humanize their villain. They don’t want that. The idea of kind, functional borderlines who strive to get better? They don’t want that. Borderlines who have lower levels of anger? They don’t want that. Borderlines who can maintain a healthy relationship? They don’t want that. Honest borderlines? That doesn’t help them. That would require changing the idea of this big bad scary illness that they love to hate, and they’re not interested in that. 

And one last thing while we’re here. Assholes suck. BPD sucks. Assholes WITH bpd are the absolute worst and you’re ruining it for all of us. Accept the problem, work on it, be kind.