Hi guys!

 In the past I was diagnosed with BPD traits. I'm saying traits because I do not fit all the stereotypical symptoms of BPD. I do not get irrationally angry, I don't try to be manipulative and various other things. The trait that I HAVE possessed are the irrational fear of being abandoned, empty feelings, anxiety, depression, terrible self esteem, etc. I've been working on myself for years to finally get to the point where I can live happily and healthily. I no longer have abandonment issues to a extreme, my self esteem is MUCH better, I'm no longer suicidal. And most importantly, I can be happy on my own.

I have been in a relationship with an amazing man since mid summer. In the beginning, I warned him of my BPD traits since it was something that had been important in my life for a long time. I didn't realize that he would research BPD and read lots of stories about severe BPD sufferers. I'm not in the severe category and my therapist didn't think so too either. However, because of the stereotype of the "typical BPD sufferer", my boyfriend does not trust that I won't suddenly wreck our relationship.
I have never given him a reason to worry about such things and we have a great relationship. Today I am extremely sick AND I'm on my period. A sensitive matter was brought up in our conversation and he assumed (incorrectly) that I would be against him or turn against him at some point. As I scrambled to defend myself and assure him otherwise, he thought I was attacking him and hung up on him with no warning. He wouldn't answer my texts so I freaked out and sent him one telling him not to leave me alone and that I was scared. (Which I was. He is my best friend and we have a great relationship. I don't want it to be ruined over something extremely stupid). He gets back on skype and starts telling me that its not fair of me to hold him hostage by threatening to hurt myself. Mind you, that is NOT what I did. I have NO intention of all of hurting myself and I have no intention of using such a terrible thing to manipulate anyone. He than told me that he was afraid I was going to act like the BPD sufferers in the relationships who mess everything up. He seems to constantly project this untrue stereotype on me and he fears me because of it. 

I have NEVER had a relationship ruined just because of my BPD. My ex-fiance even told me that I had never treated him badly during our relationship. The things that have happened in the past happened because my exes and I just weren't right for each other and they all had their OWN baggage to worry about.

How the heck to I convince him to stop making up this untrue identity of me within his head? I don't do anything to make him feel this way, but now I just constantly regret even telling him about my BPD. If I never told him, he would have never read all those stories and we would be doing great instead of having to work through this constantly.  It hurts to have to constantly reassure him that I'm not going to suddenly leave him or that I'm going to suddenly hate him or anything. I want him to trust me and I feel like I deserve to be trusted.  For once in my life, I know I'm doing wonderfully and I do not want to be brought down by an identity that isn't even me! 

**TL;DR I used to suffer from BPD traits, told my boyfriend at the beginning of our relationship and now, even though our relationship is fantastic (even our friends are jealous of it), he is projecting untrue stereotypes of BPD onto me and assumes I'm going to wreck everything.**