I hate hate hate myself.
I hate being like this. I hate all of it. 
I wish I could be a "chill" cool girlfriend, but nope. I get so jealous and so toxic and awful. 
I asked my boyfriend if we can watch a movie today and he said maybe later coz he's going to watch a movie with his best friend (who is a girl)

I'm not gonna say anything to him about it coz like I said, I don't wanna be toxic, but jesus christ I just feel like I'm going to explode

Depressive episode here I come lol