
My ex said I was abusive am I?(21F)(31M)

I started dating Bo when I was 20 he was 29. I always thought we connected well we both had a dark sense of humor and love for film. He worked a decent job but over his life had bouts of depression where he has significant gaps in his resume. He didn't finish university because even though he went to a phenomenal university, he said the classes didn’t interest or challenge him enough.
I 


I work and go to school part-time at a university in the Los Angeles area. About six months into our relationship, he quit his job because he said they were not letting him progress. He had to move home to Denver in with his parents because he couldn't afford rent. I was devastated and hurt because I tried to talk to him about options for a new job, but he was stubborn and refused. I bring up how much it hurt he left he says he doesn't feel bad he did nothing wrong





He has been home for a year and a half not working because he says his depression is so severe. When he moved back, he tried to talk to me about suicide. I said I'm not a professional I love you, but you need to speak to a doctor I can't handle that. He brings up consistently how I abounded him in his time of need. He had gone to a residential treatment place before but left because he thought they were ripping him off and that their advice was terrible. I stopped dating him officially after he moved but still talked to him.




He would say that I'm a liar. He would always try to catch me in lies like ask me aggressively if I've taken my sleeping meds (I'm proscribed this) I feel awkward to put on the spot so I say no then he goes and counts my pills. If I send him a photo, he's checked the metadata to see if I'm lying and if I don't say the exact date he calls me a liar.





He says I lie more than anyone he knows. He brings up the time I drank some of my roommate's juice or smoked one of her cigs and said I didn't. We will be texting every day frequently. He’ll ignore me for days saying he can't talk because of the depression I get upset and try to text him.



He says I'm entitled and I'm not allowed to someone's attention that I need to learn boundaries. He would bring up regularly how he misses perks from his old job. If I ever criticized him or lost my temper with him he would say I’m the meanest person he’s ever met. When I bring up the mean stuff he’s said about me he says “everything I say about you is objective fact with evidence behind it everything you say is a petty insult”






I would say to him he quit that job for no reason he could quickly get it back or live with that choice. He says I'm mean because I never let him vent. He always tells me my memory is terrible and reminds me about lies in the past. When I try to bring up something from the past, he says,” I trust my memory MORE THAN YOURS.” When I lost my temper he’s sent screenshots of the texts to mutual friends making me look bad. I would never send private texts to a mutual friend.





His plans are nothing at this point he says he's just there that he isn't going to kill himself but too depressed to work. I stopped talking to him because of other reasons, but I can't stop shaking the feeling. Do I come off as a liar? Do I sound like a bad liar? I have bad anxiety and feel not open; sometimes, I go to therapy twice a week. 




tl;Dr: Guy I dated for a little accuses me of being a liar.