Hello,

I need an advice because honestly I feel a bit lost.

These years were rough for me: my mom died in 2020, my long term relationship ended in 2022 and I got a burn out + harassed at work. I'm suing my employer now and I'm on sick leave. On top of that, I broke up with my new boyfriend recently as he was too immature to commit in a relationship, and my cat has a liver issue (hopefully it's nothing). 

Personality wise I'm usually quite bubbly and sociable, not introvert but not very extravert as I do need sometimes to have my alone time. I have multiple outdoor and indoor hobbys and have been always interested into discovering new stuff/people. 

That's what I used to be. Nowadays (it's been six months) it's hard to get up from bed before 10:30 am. My sleep pattern is crap and I feel anxious and sad everyday. Not all the time though. My appetite is off but I do eat regularly. 

I still feel happiness when I see friends, watch a good movie, listen to music, read a good book, but overall I'm sad and anxious, life feels mostly gray. I can't focus on things that I love, like reading or watching movies. Everything seems to be a bit difficult to start. I feel tired everyday. I drink coffee to stay awake. 

I miss my exes even it's for the best we're not together anymore. I feel regularly ugly, fat and uninteresting even if I know it's not the case. I still try to keep a schedule to eat, sleep, shower/make myself pretty and see friends regularly. I take care of my pets, I do my laundry and I keep my flat clean. I seriously miss who I used to be. I don't feel I'm progressing in my life and it's hard to make plans for the future. 

I don't know if I'm depressed or just taking a bit hit from everything that happened in my life recently. I did the test online and it seems that I am. My doctor thinks I am too. However as I said I'm not fully apathic or not taking pleasure in anything : I still feel happy sometimes. Yesterday I was volunteering in an association and it really made me happy. I love my cats. I went cycling with friends last week and it made me happy. I'm still am interested in a lot of things but can't manage to do them because I have no energy. 

I don't know if I'm depressed or I'm just too harsh with myself.