I feel like shit posting something like this when others here have it much more harder, but here goes. I live a relatively good life. I’m 21, got a stable job that pays well, got nice friends and a supporting family. Yet, i’m unhappy. Been like that since i was smt like 14 y/o. Since then, i’ve been thinking about ending it all, kind of a break in case of emergency thing. I made an attempt 2 years ago and well since i’m here you’ll guess that it didn’t work. I’ve accepted death, i don’t fear it, almost welcome it these days. I’ve talked with friends, my mother and recently, a psychologist. I feel that all of those conversations i had with either one of them felt useless, annoying or just plain stupid. Everyday i just put on the mask and go on with my day. But the Suicidal thought is always in a corner of my head and it just never goes away. When i come back to my place i just sit down and i’m just down, sometimes crying myself to sleep on the couch and then wake up to go back to work. I was in a relationship not so long ago, it made it better but we ended things, kinda went back to that sad hole. Not sure what i’m looking for here but i just thought i’d vent here. Not really necessarily looking for an answer to my post but it feels nice being able to talk about it without the emotional consequences it would bring to my entourage if i came out with this. Sorry for the messy post, my mind is just racing and I’m incapable of making any sense of my thoughts.