Me asking for more, him not giving it to me then me absolutely losing my collective shit and letting myself get thrown into that pit of despair thats always hanging below my feet waiting for me to fall. 
I'm sick of feeling the emotion this hard. I'm sick of thinking I'll be all alone if anything changes. I'm sick of being this way I wish I could feel normal. I'm sick of overthinking and overanalyizing and not taking people for their word, sick of him being normal and saying what he means and me reading between empty lines. 
I'm sick of letting a relationship affect me this much. It's so embarrassing, I want to be able to be alone so badly but I'm too fucking scared of it.