I want so badly to reach out to people, and have friends. But all my prior friendships met dramatic fall outs. They’ve always been my fault. I’ve hurt so many of my people who were close to me, and sometimes without evening knowing it.

 I feel guilt about 90% of the time. I’ve heard the things that they say to others about me, and I want nothing more than to erase myself from the face of this earth so maybe the people I’ve harmed can feel peace. I’ve tried so hard to be good, but it’s safer for the general population if I just keep my toxicity to myself. 