I feel constantly mentally tired. I have so many negative thoughts and get absolutely defeated over very small things. I can never focus or stick to anything for long and have no real passion for life even though I really don’t have much in my life to be upset about. And I’ve tried all the “natural” ways, eating right, exercising, proper routine, journaling, etc. All very short bursted, artificial feelings of happiness. Depression runs in my moms side, I’ve also been diagnosed.

I’ve been on antidepressants before. I was on 20mg of Citoprolam (also known as Celexa) for a good 8 months. It really did help when I was at my absolute worse, I was crying nearly every single day for very insignificant reasons and it did help regulate and stabilize my emotions. But after I was out of that dark spot it just made me feel insanely numb to emotions of all kinds. I dont think I cried for the whole 8 months (not even when i got out of my year long relationship lol). After that I talked to my doctor and she put me on 10mg of Prozac and that made me absolutely insane lol. I have never been as depressed and suicidal as I was for the two weeks I was on it. Since then I’ve been terrified of trying another one but I feel like it’s finally I take care of myself and get back on it. 

Does anyone have any recommendations? A similar story to me? How have the meds made you better? Any side effects? I’m not just set on antidepressants I would also try anti anxiety meds as they usually can go hand and hand. I appreciate any advice anyone has to give me greatly! Thank you so much