hiiii :))), i was recently diagnosed with BPD and ptsd. I was diagnosed with bipolar until i finally met a psychiatrist who took an hour instead of 5 minutes to actually talk to me and listen to everything i've been to. I feel like i've taken a huge step towards getting better at managing BPD and already feel comforted reading others' posts that i'm not alone. 

My therapist and i have been drawing connections with past experiences to BPD and i realized that a lot of things i missed out on were due to it. I was basically non existent before my sophomore year of college, even now im still somewhat non existent. 

I would really appreciate any stories of people over 20 doing well with BPD or anyone around my age relating to the next paragraph:

I'm about to turn 20 and got hit with a major depression episode. i realized that i lost all my teenage and childhood years to bpd and i cant do anything about it. I constantly see instagram posts with people my age having fun and it makes me realize how many of my goals that i set when i turned 13 were never achieved. I wanted to lose weight and get my health issues under control, do well in school, and as silly as it sounds i wanted to have a sneaker collection by the time i was 20. i didn't lose weight or become some super pretty person, i'm not even doing half well in school. i graduated high school at 16 and that's my only achievement that i ever had throughout my entire life that i base my entire personality off of. I feel like i've accepted that my youth is over and every time i think of something cool to do i automatically tell myself my kids will do that (not planning to have them anytime soon lol). For example, my friends will talk about how they're going to festivals or have gone and instead of telling myself i should go to one, i automatically think about how i'll let my future children go. I feel like i've kinda accepted ill never do anything youthful and just have to accept ill be working some full time after school and barely be making ends meet with how poorly doing right now.

&amp;#x200B;

i have nothing else to be proud of and i just need to know if im not alone in feeling like im mourning experiences or my younger years