I don't have any friends for one simple reason: I've never really made the attempt. I've been alone for practically my whole life. Yes, I have parents and a family. But I mean aside from them. I was shy growing up and that just morphed into me being introverted and preferring quiet solitude. Yes, I live in a bubble of my own making. But I also don't really have much of a desire to want friends either. 

What I want, truly want, more than anything, is affection. That's all. I don't hate people. Not at all. I'm not a hateful person. But I want to at least know what holding a girl's hand is like. Even a kiss would suffice but hopefully build up from there. 

Yet, even though I make myself sound virtuous, I'm afraid me not having friends will be a deal breaker for a girl. Or, if not a deal breaker, she'll treat me with suspicion and likely leave. 

And I'll be alone at the end of my days.