Anyone been successful when the spouse is partly responsible for the PTSD and is the focus of all their triggers now? 

My wife has PTSD, and it causes her severe anxiety, and I trigger her everytime I am around her. I've acknowledged that I was a husband who was checked out, neglectful, and in a depression fueled by alcohol. This went on for years. I've since, in the past 3 years, stopped drinking, been supportive, and done everything I could to be a great husband. And my wife has forgiven me, and wanted to have a future, but now she's in a place where she doesn't see it now. I know I've caused much of her PTSD over the years, but I also feel she had a childhood with one parent passed and another aloof, a previous abusive marriage before ours, and another relationship that she feels tremendous guilt over because it greatly affected her child from the previous marriage. And then I added to all that when I should have been her support. But I do feel her focus is solely on my mistakes and not the other factors. 

4 different therapists have said no, there is no moving forward in the marriage, and healing can only happen with an end to the relationship.

There are two young children involved, 7 and 5, 7 year old with autism, so we will still be in each other's lives.