It makes me sick how the majority of people only really give a shit about themselves. People have told me in the past that I feel that way because I lack boundaries and expect other people to be that way too, and I think this has been true in some cases especially when my own emotions are involved. But I also think I have really valid reasons for feeling this way. 

Like I've noticed that a lot of people who do good things for others only do it so that they can feel good about themselves and they will brag about the nice things they do so that they can get recognition. These kind of people annoy me most because they appear to be good but if you ever need them when it's inconvenient for them then their true colors will show and they'll always prioritize what is good for them. 

Also the majority of people I encounter don't really wanna listen to you in conversation. They just want to talk about themselves. I feel like I can tell that they're just waiting for me to stop talking so they can say what they want to say. The only exception to this is when I'm telling them something that is applicable to their life, like when I'm giving them advice or helping them somehow. 

And I guess it shows best in how quickly people are willing to leave you. They think I'm the fucking best at first, so cool and understanding and fun to be around. But then as soon as I'm in a bad place emotionally they leave. They don't care to take the time to understand why I am the way I am and they don't care to ride out the stormy moments because in the end it's all about them and they don't have any dedication to sticking around as soon as they feel slightly uncomfortable.

Are the majority of people actually painfully self absorbed or is this bpd lying to me?