I originally posted this is a different sub but I need advice from anyone, including those with BPD. Before I get started I want to say that I love my boyfriend and I care for him deeply. I do not stigmatize and I empathize with anyone who is suffering or struggling with BPD. My relationship with my boyfriend hasn't been the healthiest for quite some time, but it doesn't take away the fact that I care for and love him and just want the best for him, but I know his mental health gets the best of him sometimes and it affects me negatively sometimes. 

So....me and my boyfriend got into a heated fight yesterday because I got defensive when he was suspicious and accusing me of doing shady shit with other guys. We left the mall and I started driving home. He was pushing my buttons and pushing me to the edge while driving so I some what lost it and told him to shut the fuck up. I'm not proud of it and feel awful but I was just tired and he would not stop. We have been having arguments like every other day and I am just mentally exhausted. After I said that he screamed at me at the top of his lungs which I wasn't going to take while driving, so I told him to get out of my car. I was going to pull over so he could calm down and collect himself but he took that literally and jumped out of the passenger side while I was going like 40mph on a main road with cars behind us. He could have easily kill himself, injured himself badly, or caused me or another car to crash. I was shaking to death after. 

I am traumatized and feel completely awful. I don't know what to do. His mental state is not the best right now and he is not getting treatment or help and hasn't been for the 2.5 years we have been together. He has been suicidal many times. He told me that sometimes you have to take extreme measures to get your point across. He has essentially been spiraling for the past few weeks or so. And now he is feeling guilty and awful about yesterday. I care about him a lot and I want him to be safe and get help if he needs it. 

Would contacting his family and letting them know what happened be a good idea? I don't want him to hate me but I feel that they should know so they can help him. (We are both 22 and 23 living at home). I don't know to do in this situation.