whenever i touch something, i feel as though i’m not grasping it enough, like there’s something missing from my surroundings. everyday feels like i’m floating and i don’t feel my body at all, like i don’t really belong in it and that every action i do has no effect on me because everything doesn’t feel real. i remember going to a park at night and looking up at the sky, and i felt more float-y (if that makes sense) more than i have ever felt before, and the voices around me became random sounds i could no longer understand. i am emotionally numb towards everything, but i can still feel heavy sadness and anger that never goes away. i have been like this for almost two years now and i know to myself that i’m getting worse, i just don’t know what it is.