Okay so I’m currently in a Open LDR (we’ve never met in person) with my boyfriend of 3 years. We both have bpd… let me just start by saying he’s probably the only man I have had the longest relationship with, my past was filled with flings and one night stands but never a committed relationship. So we both got jobs this year and I thought this might be a good thing for us cause now we’ll be able to meet with no financial stress. Now when I got this job, my main goal was to save as much money as I could so I could relocate overseas (English teacher in SK) now he knows this very well because I practically tell him everything. From my pay I only use 20% and save the other 80%, living at home though has been hard and has meant that I have had to dip more frequently and this has been taking a toll on me because I feel like I’m getting no where with my future plans. Now he is very aware of this because I tell him EVERYTHING! But recently he’s been asking me for money and obviously I’m not going to say no I love him but it’s really bothering me especially considering the amount keeps getting bigger… 
Another thing to add is our relationship has become very strained lately due to him being busy alll the time and sometimes going days with no communication, which I understand though because he has work and studies and he smokes weed a lot so it knocks him out easily. But I’m also working and studying and I always make time for him… I don’t want to seem like an annoying girlfriend but maybe I’m expecting too much from him. My closest friend even tells me to leave him but I can’t because of the love which I sometimes question thinking it may just be because of trauma bonding. It’s not like we’re going to last anyway since we both want very different futures. He wants a wife and kids but I don’t want to get married or have kids. Should I just break it off now?