Hello, I’m kinda new to Reddit and this is practically my first ever post on a subject like this. I’m 22 years old and haven’t achieved much in my life. I usually work dead end jobs until I impulsively quit thinking that everything will get better in the future. I’m lazy, sometimes bipolar, and even when I’m happy, I tend to have self-destructive behaviors where I know it’ll only lead to negatives, yet I keep doing so. Even in moments where I’m beyond happy, I have an intrusive thought 10 minutes later that’ll completely ruin my day and depending on the reasoning behind it, I’ll distance myself from the people that correspond with my thought. I don’t want to, but it’s sort of the self-destructive behavior I was talking about. I’m not even sure why I’m posting this or what I’m really looking for but I figured I’d rant and this seemed like the appropriate place to do so. I never think about inflicting harm on myself or anything like that but it’s just aggravating that I can go from being happy one minute and being so positive, just to end up having an intrusive thought that instantly kills my mood. My days don’t consist of much anymore. I’m currently out of work, I don’t go to school, I vary from doing nothing but sleeping to then getting absolutely no sleep, and I lack the energy or motivation to put my mind to things now. I guess I’m just seeing if people deal with similar things yet push through those obstacles to brighten their future