Hi, fellow borderliners. I have an issue that is profoundly damaging to me and everyone around me.

So, this is what happened:

A friend of mine and I agree to talk on the phone, doesn't text me until tomorrow, explaining she had a bad day. Apologizes. Ok, understandable. Apology accepted. But, you can at least fucking send a quick message, so I don't wait for nothing (wrote her this). Not the first time this happens. One day later, still resentful, and lonely too. Especially because she doesn't text me or reschedule. And, I don't fucking believe her. I believe she talked to someone else instead that evening and lied about being in a bad mood. Leaves me on fucking read. Now I want to text her she is a deceptive bitch, who only comes to one when her first priorities aren't available. How hard can it fucking be to send a quick message? Are her prefrontal cortex underdeveloped or what? It drives me bonkers. I have to suffer for days every time something like this happens because my emotions are so extreme. It's like wrapping a ticking bomb in a birthday present expecting the present to shield the explosion. Sooner or later, it will explode when no one expects it. It is obsessive thoughts 24/7 and I cannot concentrate on anything.

Radical idealization, followed by radical devaluation has happened here. I know.

I can also see it this way: She is speaking the truth: She had a bad evening and her not texting me as usual and leaving me on read is nothing other than a coincidence. I can easily see this perspective, but my emotions are so extreme they don't recede.

What can I do to improve this?