For the last few years I've seen a pattern in my life: every 1.5-2 months I have around a week where I feel the worst (thinking of quitting everything, starting new addictions, self harm, low self esteem, not being able to do anything even if I have so much to do to the extent of having a fear of leaving my bed, etc) and I don't believe that will ever end.

After that follows a week when I have some sort of god complex and I have so much energy and I work all day. People usually notice that sudden change and tell me without hesitation because that seems odd to them.

In between this god complex week and the next bad week my mood gradually declines. 

If this matters, I usually sleep around 3-4 hours, go to sleep around 3 am.

Yes, I know that it would be ideal to ask a therapist, but I can't afford it and my parents make fun of my for bringing up going to therapy and won't approve of it.

So my question is: do you think this is related to bipolarity? If not, is it something else?

To be honest I'm scared of either having or not having it, since not having it (or something else) means I can't understand what's wrong with me and why this messes up my life.