Since I can remember, people around me treat me like a dog because I'm more quiet. I became more annoyed at it throughout the years. But cheerful people, even teachers, strangers that normally are loud, would change their tone and energy around me.

My fp told me that he 'vibed' more with my friend than he ever has with me. What tf am I supposed to do about that?! I'm trying so hard to talk about normal things w him and being more like her and even that, he gives me mean responses. But if it was her, oh how things would be different.

Why. The. Fuck. Does. It. Have. To be. Like this.

I'm pretty loud as well when I'm very close to someone but even then, I start to question whether that person was holding themselves back because of whatever the fuck I have that makes people act this way towards me.
I hate that I'm needing his validation, because rn I feel like shit but if only he told me what I want to hear and thought of me as I wished, I'd be fulfilled.