I’m so fucking upset 

It’s retriggered so much I thought I was doing better with. I feel so fucking empty and I can’t stop crying. 

I was having such a good night with my new friends who have been amazing and were amazing to me today and last night, and it all went to shit so fucking quickly. 

I’ve been trying so fucking hard not to just,,,up and leave like I do every time I feel like shit isn’t going to come back to how it was afterwards. My friends had to come and basically force their way to see if I was okay cause I just went radio silent which I am,,,so so grateful for. I just feel so fucking stupid, and ashamed, and guilty for completely shutting everyone out but I just do not want to exist right now.