I just thought of this as I noticed how I'm going through a 'phase' again. Where I desperately try to cling onto an identity and become really obsessed. Its weird and really annoying, since I know it'll probably change again in a while. So like I'm half hispanic and the past month I've really been into latin stuff, I've been improving my spanish, doing my makeup differently etc etc. It literally makes me cringe typing this out

I used to be the biggest chola tomboy and earlier this month I became friends with this girl who's just like that. I'm so obsessed with her like I just wanna BE her (she's not even my FP) so I'm just completely changing who I am.. again. I don't know how to stop it since its already in my head, its like I become a different person. Like having a lite version of multiple personality disorder. My whole personality just changes, lately I've been more extroverted, loud, angry whereas I've been the opposite for the few months before

Its so annoying realizing I do this and I wonder if my long term friends notice, because it must look ridiculous. Luckily career wise I'm pretty stable, but my hobbies or the things I like do change a lot too

Typing this out makes me CRINGE so bad, especially knowing I'm aware of this and have been several times in the past fuck lol. Its not really the worst thing, like nobody's ever really commented on it but its still a severe problem for me personally. None of the BPDs I've talked to have identity issues this bad. I don't really know what to do