Soo, it's not directly related to BPD, but I struggle a lot with relationships and I need to vent and I need your opinion on something. I have BPD and it's made me act like an ass before because of it, but I've worked super hard in the past year and am finally to a place where I can say I co-exist with my BPD, it doesn't completely run my life anymore. Soo, I've been in some kind of a relationship on and off with someone and I've made mistakes in the past. I never cheated on them or anything like that, never even thought about it but I wouldn't tell them everything because truth is, I was scared (again, BPD-related habits or reflexes trying to ruin my life).  It's the first time in many years that I care in that way about a person. But they have wounds from past traumas, so they have a hard time with trusting. And so, they ended things again a few days ago. I worked a lot on myself in the past year and so for the past 4-5months, I was finally able to be my true complete self with them and I do believe I am good for them because I know what it's like to feel insecure and not so confident and all, so I always made sure to try and make them feel good (without saying it directly, but you know, giving them compliments, offering my help, asking what they needed and doing it, etc). Anyways, they asked that we don't see each other nor talk for a good while, until they "are ready to try and just be friends".
I really want to respect that, I do. But all I see and hear from all that is that they are so scared, that they'd rather push me away than work through this with me. I know there is a huuge connection and a lot of love between us, and they told me it was hurting them just as much to do this, but they had to.
So if you've read this far, here's what I need help with or at least your opinion or some kind of pointers:
- For the first time EVER in my life, I know I don't have much to blame myself for, I've been there to listen and help them and even asked them what they wanted me to do to make sure I respected their limits and their pace. So, how can I eliminate this feeling that I have failed. I have always been overthinking everything my entire life, so for me to recognize that is a big deal, but I still feel like I failed
- Has something similar ever happened to you? How did you deal with the anger and the urge to contact them or try to be there and obsess over their well-being from a distance ....

Am I crazy for wanting to fight for them and wanting to keep on trying to treat them right and give them the love they deserve? They gave so much to everyone their entire life and received so little. I would very much love to keep on being the person able to give them back all this help and love. But it just makes them feel bad, like they shouldn't accept it. Do I fight, or do I just accept that they can't receive it and give up? 
How do you give up on good people??

Oh folks, you probably won't read all this, but it still feels good to just share it, get it out of my head a little. I do still hope I'll get a little bit of feedback, that I'm not the only one.