Lately, I've felt like I'm being more impulsive with... everything, especially money.

I've been spending as if there is no tomorrow, buying shit I don't need, I've been either eating a lot or eating barely enough, I've had to held myself back from saying that I am definitely killing myself someday, I am... turning into a weird person ?

Idk if it is because I know how I'm going to try kms, if it is because I can't think about the future (since I don't really want to live even a week more), but it feels like sometimes I'm crossing a line, behavior wise. I feel like I'm crossing my own limits and idk what to do