All the women he follows on social media are literally women with eating disorders. His preferences are beyond even 'natural skinny' even though he insists all of them are healthy and I'm like 'uh, no??? Healthy BMI don't fucking rant about how fat they feel and how they wanna eat like five fucking pizzas' and ON TOP OF THAT a good majority of his exes were SUPER FUCKING SKINNY where I'm obviously overweight.

Like, fuck, I can't even glance at his social media because everyone is petite or perfect 'lolita' body types and can't help but feel super inadequate despite him insisting he loves me regardless of size. He tried to mitigate the past gf thing by pulling up the social of a PERFECTLY FULL BODIED EX and was like 'see, I've dated bigger girls just fine' which sent me absolutely fucking REELING internally because I'm nowhere NEAR that hourglass body type and am now in a full blown quiet relapse because I can't take it anymore. Did I mention he has nudes of all his exes still? I went into the relationship knowing this but I feel like a fucking idiot for pretending I'm okay with it.