I’m a 21F. I just started crying bc i should be packing to go for eid at my uncle’s and i still haven’t done that. I should also pack to move out. I have nothing to eat for iftar and my room is literally disgusting. I haven’t showered in two days and everything about me is a complete mess.

I literally just randomly started crying and screaming. I miss being mentally okay. I forgot what it feels like to be okay and not suicidal. I miss taking care of myself and my looks and my room. I had the cleanest room in my dorm and the clearest skin ever. I always looked and smelled good. My life was never as messy as it is rn.

I’m helpless and i hate it. I can’t stop thinking about taking my own life. I want to confront my family about it but I don’t want them to think i am a failure and I don’t want to be a burden on them. I really want to kms bc i feel like i’m a burden on myself and my surroundings. 

Please pray for me. It’s ramadan. I’m a muslim. Allah accepts prayers from all religions and all people. Pray for me. I don’t want to take my own life because it’s a sin in my religion. And thats the only thing keeping me alive.