I've posted here in the past about how my FP gave up on me after I fucked up hardcore by not respecting boundaries. A mutual friend listed all these reasons why he did and some of them were things he said, others not. It's been 2 months since and the mutual friend blocked me even though I haven't talked to her for 5 weeks. It's brought back a lot of memories and I'm so upset for myself and blaming myself for *everything* that happened between us and him. My therapist and everyone around me says it's not all my fault and actually, most of it is the mutual friend. On top of that, she gaslit me to make me blame myself. Everyone is saying to hold out and eventually he will contact me (including my therapist). Right now, I hate myself for what I did but I don't even know what to believe was my fault. I'm so tired and exhausted about it all, and that this person has manipulated me since I knew her about 2 years ago. Even now she's hurting me and I don't talk to her. I'm lost. I'm confused. I'm ready to be done.