I just saw an ask reddit of "what would you do if the world was ending in 10 minutes?" And I said I would let my autistic son tell me all about his dinosaurs in his game he loves even though he tells me every day, I usually just cut him off if I'm busy. I would wanna die seeing him at his happiest and him to be the happiest he's been. 
Now I'm sobbing because I'm just imagining him passing away and how that would make me feel if he was gone and imagining yhe fear he would have.....I have a huge phobia of loved ones dying, especially my son. Or me dying and leaving him behind and him not understanding.