I was diagnosed with BPD almost 2 years ago but haven’t received too much help specifically for the behaviors that I’ve built up. I’ve done so much work on myself the last 6 months and I’ve felt significantly better day to day. Now I’ve started expanding into trying to socialize and date, realizing I haven’t made as much progress as I thought. Throughout the process I’ve been trying to rationalize all my thoughts and dismantle them if needed. I started casually speaking to a guy about a month ago who lives far away, so I haven’t met him yet but am supposed to in a month. I’ve told myself over and over again to not let this dictate my life, that it is CASUAL. I’ve felt pretty good about it and haven’t had too many thoughts of commitment as I would in the past. We had the conversation today about long distance not being an option, which I 10000% agree I’m not ready to be in a relationship let alone a long distance one. 
But I guess it’s the sheer fact that he communicated it to me that made me extremely anxious. I knew logically that this would be the outcome but the anxiety is overcoming me with thoughts of abandonment and worthlessness. I’m upset I haven’t made the progress I did. 
Has anyone been successful in controlling these thoughts, and if so, how?