TW (mention of self harm) I don’t have a formal diagnosis but recently I’ve noticed I have a lot of the symptoms of bpd. A lot of my relationships (familial, romantic, and platonic) are really tumultuous bc of my immense fear that everyone hates me. I tend to act on that fear in really harmful and toxic ways. I’ve physically harmed myself in the past but now i think the harm has transpired into a more psychological form. My therapist has told me that I’m a “highly sensitive person” which seems to me almost analogous to someone who has bpd. (I don’t mean to insensitive I’m just very ignorant about HSPs and BPD). 

Recently I learned about the concept of FPs and I think I have one. I told this person that I think they’re my FP and they said that they can’t be in my life anymore. They said they can’t handle that responsibility. I told them it’s not really something I can control bc it’s how I feel. We’ve had a rough relationship for the past couple of years but all I want really is to make them happy and to be around them. They blocked my number (albeit bc I asked them to) and I can’t handle it. I feel like someone cut off one of my arms and I just want things to be normal. I regret telling them that I think they’re my FP since I’m not even sure that if it’s true. I don’t know what to do..