I'm sorry , this is my first post ever on reddit ,,

 I've been getting so self aware recently of what I do and say. I sometimes find myself holding my own hand when I'm anxious and I feel like that's not normal.. . I almost always have my jaw clenched whenever I'm feeling stressed. I'm super shy at conversations too, I feel like i think too hard about what to say and what people will think of it,

I always compare myself to other people, thinking I'll never be good as them, 

I always ask my family if I'm normal; and they say I am, and I just ask the same thing over and over again, I feel like i always need reassurance,,. about a year ago because I was stressed about not being normal, I went to go and get a diagnosis; when it finished , i was diagnosed with anxiety and no symptoms of anything I was concerned about. I was relieved then but now these feelings are back again.


Its just beating me up and I don't know what my head wants from me anymore , it just finds things to constantly worry about  😔


I recently turned 20 too, and it's really starting to make me sad , the thought that im getting older and that my mental health makes it harder for me to  be who I want to be, it's just emotionally draining and I can't help it but cry jsjdh 


I'm sorry if this is all confusing or anything , :(