Hi. 

First and foremost, I want to highlight that this post does include mentions of suicidal ideation, and self harm.  Before I get into the purpose of this post, I just want to give a little context to my partner and I's relationship. We have been together now for about 11 months, and I have never been happier. Over the course of these 11 months though, there have been a few events that have not been super great. 

My partner rapid cycles every once in a while, and when they do, they get to a very very low and dark place. They could be extremely happy in one moment, and we could be having a very good time together, but in the next, they are accusing me of not loving them, and become very depressed. My partner has struggled with their mental health for a very long time, and have significant trauma. I do my best to be as sympathetic as possible to them, as what they have experienced is horrendous. 

Recently, we have begun to talk very seriously about counseling for them. They keep going back and forth on the idea, and have not quite committed to anything yet. I can feel that they want to get help, but I'm unsure of how to nudge them in the right direction, and maybe help them in this journey. I am confident that they will try counseling though, as they do really seem to want to try it, but maybe are a little fearful. Over the last week, I have done a deep dive into BPD. I want to understand my partner, and the way they feel and operate. I want to support them however I possibly can. I really care for this person, and love them more than anything. 

With all of that said, here is the current issue. I am going to Florida next week with my mom and brother, and this has not sat well with my partner. They feel as though I am abandoning them in their time of need. I have been planning this trip with my mom and brother for months, and with it being so close to the date, I don't think I can cancel the trip. I have asked my partner if they wanted to come, but they don't want to, and don't think they would be able to come anyway. I have asked mutual friends of ours if they can make plans with them while I am gone, and have tried to keep my partner looking to the future. 

How can I best support my partner while I am away? What things can I do to reassure them?  I want to be able to enjoy my trip, but also let my partner know that I have not abandoned them. Also, what things can I do to make counseling more appetizing to my partner? Would couple's counseling be effective?

Sorry for the long post, and thank you so much for reading. I hope to hear from some of you soon.