Uh ...so yes, it may come off as childish....but the friends I have/had who are well off make me insecure .
I grew up and have been under the poverty line. In general, simple things make me happy ...like knitting, or going to my local park, hiking the same trail, eating the same food..... Used to be the type that complained about the lack of art and culture back in my highschool and community college days...I was very artsy type ..until I transferred to Berkeley .
Berkeley was the first exposure I had to very wealthy peoole and the woowoo new age vegan yoga crystal life on steroids. The hyper performative artsiness, radicalness , intellectualism and spirituality I encountered in these people put me off from that world. I realized I was a big fish in a small pond back home and it kind of broke me. Do I really want to continue in that artsy hipster rat race?
And I AM a mibimalist. All my clothes fit into a 70L backpack, my phone is a free phone etc etc...but the minimalism is half from poverty and half from personal anticonsumer beliefs, but the minimalism does not look minimalist modern hipster Instagram type.

So I do have a friend who is like that and another I fired for this reason: these people make me insecure. I just feel like a stupid, poor , uncool Mexican around them . They don't tell me directly, but just hearing them say how much more cultured Berlin , Tehran, Taiwan,New York etc feel like personal attacks because Im quite happy with this area for the nature. I have no desire to see much of the world.

For the food bit... I am not a super picky eater because food is food and I have been homeless, I have spent many times without food...but these people are the kind who won't eat something if it is microwaved. Or look down on certain foods ..not realizing their privilege .

The other is the aesthetics/art/design/fashion. They always dress so clean and modern. Me? I ....look like a bum. Jeans, rainbows or vans, baseball tee , flannel jacket and my backpack because I do not drive.  I am also curvy in the right places. So when I do go into artsy/minimal places like hipster stores or friend's house.... I feel like a huge muddy dog running into an all white gallery with glass pieces displayed that I can potentially bump into .

These hipster minimal modern designer stores or just homes or places set up like that ... just makes me focus on how much stuff i carry with me or just how ugly i dress or space my body takes up. I am happy and ok with myself when by myself .
But the minute I hang out with my friend or ex friend and go to those places with them or visit their house....all these insecurities come flooding into me.

So I can admit it ..but now what?  I embraced not trying to be anyone or anything as a reaction from Berkeley and what I saw there ..but I feel like such an uncultured ignorant pos when around my friend...and she only has an AA and not the brightest crayon .... Why am I allowing people i dont even admire affect me like this?

Tldr: clean minimalist modern hipster places and things make me hella insecure even if i dont want to be like that. Why???? Now what do I do after realizing this?