19m I feel like i try so hard everyday to just make it through a day and it never gets easier. I continually get disappointed by other people and I can’t even make sense of what to type i. here because i’m literally tired of this. i’m tired of working for absolutely nothing i give i’m such an asshole and i literally just make peoples lives worse. I think about killing myself every single day for years. I don’t see any way i can make life worth living i am a pessimist i find the worst in every situation. I don’t even know why my friends like me i will catch a bitchy attitude so fast like it’s not even enjoyable to be around me as a person. I’ve tried before to make things better for myself so many times but i always fall back into my toxic cycle of hating myself, everything around me, and smoking so goddamn much that i can barely breathe. I really don’t enjoy this and i don’t know any way to help. I’m reading over this now and i can barely understand what i’m saying i’m sorry.