I haven't been to the doctor, counselor, therapist.. but i am in a constant struggle in identifying what is wrong with me .

It all started in starting of 2021. Due to some traumatic event and overlapping exams , i started to get anxiety attacks (reaching to a point where my my hands started shaking).

Anyway time went by and by the end of 2021 i became hopeless about the future , time started to pass by , i stopped thinking about myself and i didn't had any desires.
(Lost the desire to go out , shoping, enjoying). 

I always thought that i don't belong here and i have done nothing to get anything i have (meaning i don't deserve what i have ).

2022 started and i cannot specify the exact time but i became NUMB to almost everything. To this date, i still go to college. 
I stress about small things.

Feel hopeless about everything.

Hate almost everyone and everything.

My decisions change in a snap because my mood changes 
(At one instance i want to go out and then i think of not going anywhere)

Fear of future , no emotions 

always talking about how my life is miserable

I am tired...