I remember I used to always say "are you dumb" to people and I felt rly bad afterwards and I'll always apologise. It has gotten better recently and I have more control of what I say nowadays. But yesterday my stepmom started to scream at me again and while hiding in my room I heard her say "is she dumb or something" then I realised maybe it came from her. I feel so disgusting. I hate so much, I wish she would die. I don't wan't to be like her. I feel so disgusting and I just hate myself so much right now. I hate myself so much. I want to erase myself I'm so disgusting.