My whole therapy and management has revolved around being a loner and handling symptoms as they come. Basically cutting myself off from external stress (i.e. other people).

Made a really bad life decision, got myself a lover, when I've never had one in all my adult life and I'm nearing 30. Not only that but it has become a serious relationship. Now I got this person in my life I'm very in love with.

I don't know how to handle my symptoms. I think I've been trying to do the most mature thing, when I feel ill I just isolate myself, I come out of my hole after a couple of days. I'm not exposing my lover to being seen like this, and I'm applying damage control to the relationship. Either way I'm the problem here. I make sure I am NOT ghosting the other person by chatting up through the day. Like "I am busy, don't feel like going to your place".

I've been pretty honest about having BPD comorbid with depression and psychosis, requiring meds everyday, therapy once a week and ocassionally having to end up in the psych ward. Haven't been honest about the magnitude of it. My relationship is only a couple of months old. We never argue, no conflict, nothing to fight about, secrets are minimized, no jealousy. I know when I'm feeling low or happy or being erratic and I just hide. This will be an issue and I don't know how to takle it.

TL;DR loner with BPD got a lover, lover is great, never fight, no need to. Got episodes of being low or erratic, don't know how to express this to lover. Think I'm better off just hiding until it goes away.