I have BPD and I wonder what the other perspective is like since all my relationships have ended badly and I'm in a journey of healing from my toxic traits but also accepting who I am. 

Most of the responses that I see while googling this are so negative and I feel like ill never find a healthy relationship because ultimately I feel like I am damaged. So I kind of wanna investigate how it looks like on the other side to maybe reach an understanding on how it looks like dating someone with BPD since I only have my own perspective and feel like I'm messing up all the time no matter what I do. 

Been getting memories of my past behavior and how I hurt others which I didnt do on purpose but it happened. the only ex that I'm still friends with mentioned that I gave him both the best and worst memories of his life but in my mind all I think is the negative parts that I don't see how I could've given him or anyone good memories.