I’m not sure if I have BPD but I’ve suspected it for a long time. 7 years ago I had my best friend/ Girlfriend slowly abandon me before blocking me entirely. I cried for 3 straight months and I would still break down crying for a year. Recently I got a job that was too hard for me and I broke down crying. I hadn’t seriously thought about her in a year but for the past week, she is all I can think about. It is interfering with everything, I have this apartment that I can’t afford now and I’m desperately trying to get a job to make rent but everything seems so hopeless. I have tried to contact her multiple ways but I am always ignored. I don’t know what to do anymore, my life feels empty without her friendship. I don’t know what to do anymore, I pushed her away because of my mental illness and my life has only gone downhill since. I’m so lonely and scared.