been broken up with my ex for months now but i come home every day from school and just cry about how he treated me at the end. 

i started convulsing really and uncontrollably shaking for what seems like eternity 

the crying gasps feel like somebody’s suffocating me and i cannot stop wailing 

it passes within 1-2 minutes but starts again within the next 30 minutes as i keep remembering and triggering myself with memories of him. this happens around 4-6 times more lasting 3 hours. 

i have become more functional without him because before i couldn’t even eat. how long will this last? i am journaling, meditating, even trying to forgive. i have not spoken to him in a month. our last interactions were neutral and he is desperate to still reconcile as friends in future.