I keep expecting to go to sleep and not wake up but I'm still here and I hate it. I don't have anything to offer the world, no talents, I'm not smart, and I'm more of a burden than anything. I'll just end up working for minimum wage the rest of my life if I don't die soon. I don't want to continue this worthless life if I'm just gonna die anyway. It's my fault that I'm so alone, I pushed everyone away and then blamed them. I'm not even trying to get better, I gave up awhile ago. I'm not gonna kill myself because I'm too afraid of the nothingness but I just wish I could disappear.