I’m suffering a bit now. Saw a white light pass by when I was outside. I friended many people from support group on Facebook. They look fine… going out to lunch/movies, enjoying themselves when symptoms don’t flare up. I am not too aware of the situation. I recently friended a person from a birthday party. I have a soft spot for her since she is straightforward whereas most normal people can hide their flaws. I think it is time to work on my weight since I’m looking a bit chubby and tired lately and the guy I like is in his 20s. My goal is to overcome the things I cannot see. That said, I’m thinking about my relatives abroad. Social pressure is really high there and my cousins aren’t really rich. One works at the mall. She recently divorced her husband because he wasn’t rich enough... It just feels like the stigma of being lower class is worse than in the Western world and the poor are drugged by television and consumerism and dream of living the good life so the system can be maintained. I don’t mind visiting, though. Ironic since I live in Hawaii. My mom’s side is rich though. Great grandparents moved from their Hakka village to Indonesia and became rich through business. I recently put their photos on social media and now the poor cousins might have seen them… I‘m zoning in and out of psychosis and all that helps are food and rest.