(18M) This is my first post here. I got diagnosed with Bipolar 2 a few months back and my psychiatrist prescribed topiramate. I just got out of the hospital. I was there for 3 weeks. While I was there I was miserable and I wanted to die. But now I feel great. I last slept more than 78 hours ago. Initially I felt really productive so I went on a coding run for a few hours. But I noticed that I'm acting like even more of an asshole and just pushing my friends away cus I'm angry and frustrated. I completely changed my hairstyle (got dreadlocks and dyed them red). I spent hundreds on new clothes. 

I hate the feeling of the topiramate so sometimes I dont take it and I also started doing lean (codeine / cough syrup). I'm a straight A student but these last few months I've been slipping. I'm fully aware this is a new low but it feels so good.