So i just found an online forum for those who have a pwBPD in their life and at first I was thinking like "oh this is so great, maybe my SO should check this out" and I imagined it was going to be a lovely community of caring people trying to figure out what their loved ones are going through and how to support them. Almost all the posts I saw though were people discussing how toxic and manipulative their pwBPD were/are. I'm not here to trash talk that online community, I'm writing to reflect on how I could maybe react in a less panicked way to seeing people stigmatize BPD.

I also get it. I understand that everyone needs support, but reading the posts got me really paranoid and I started spiralling and believing that I must be abusive and toxic. The posts I saw felt like affirmations of all my worst fears of how others must view me.

In reality I have quite healthy relationships and I really don't think I'm being manipulative toxic or harmful. Reading those posts though just give me terrible thoughts about myself and I feel emotionally exhausted now. Sharing these feelings here helps me cope when spiralling. Thanks fam &lt;3