When I'm feeling depressed, suicidal, or anxious, laying on a pillow and pretending it's someone important to me always helps. It could be my parents, friends, or crush. Just reminding yourself that someone cares and reminding yourself of a reason to live can really help. Even if you don't have someone to imagine, you could always just picture that it's someone who cares about you. I promise it helps. It has calmed me down so many times :)