I don’t know why I suddenly i feel heavy and dark today. I went home earlier than my colleagues and on my way home I just want to jump on the metro rail and die, and that thought made me feel good. I don’t know but I just do. I felt hopeless and helpless and felt like the world doesn’t give a shit. People don’t  really care. I dont really care.I don’t even know what’s my intention in writing this. I guess just to vent out. The world is so numb and I feel so sensitive. All senses are heightened. And I Don’t know what to do. no energy to socialize and fix these issues. Why can’t I be like the rest of the normal people. Why do I even think that way? It’s a sad sad world. I don’t know if I can survive this.