I know having a fp is a huge part of bpd. Maybe it’s because I’m so self aware and damaged by my past relationships, or maybe it’s because I’m extremely selfish, but I just don’t have a favourite person nor can I think of ever having one. My last (and only) relationship was ridden with my BPD toxicity and abuse from his end too, but he was never a fp. None of my friends growing up (not that I had many) were ever a fp. Even now, I have few friends and none of them have ever been close enough to me to consider a fp. The person who now experiences my BPD the most is my mom, and she’s not my fp either. The only thing I idolize like a fp is my cat. 

Anyone else just not have a fp, or has never had one?