I was so in love for the first time ever and truly cherished a relationship for the first time but I convinced myself that I was going to ruin him and I need to do him a favor and leave him before I do too much damage. In the moment I felt I would feel fine without him. Yea it’s gonna hurt but I’ll live. 

Fast forward to the first week of him not hanging out with me and I’ve cried every single day. I’ve texted him called and yelled at him so many times. Telling him he doesn’t give a fuck about me because if he did he wouldn’t move on this quickly. I can’t stop crying I feel like I’m going crazy because I can’t believe I let myself give him this much power and the worse thing about it is I thought I was stronger than this.

I feel so alone but I’m mad at myself because I should be able to be alone and be happy with myself but I’m not. I’m miserable and I have no idea what to do with myself. I don’t want to work I don’t want to leave the bed I hate looking at myself. Who the fuck am I?