I’ve been depressed and at times I’ve been trying to get through it and at times I feel like I don’t care to fight anymore 

Tonight, I spoke to a friend and said that I simply didn’t want to fight and strangely this actually made me feel better admitting that I didn’t want to get out of depression, that I didn’t want to pull myself up and try again 

The sentence sounds like utter defeat but I seem to have felt some relief in just admitting and accepting that 

Any thoughts?