I've started this post and then erased it a hundred god damn times, trying to make sure I didn't disclose anything that could reveal who she is. Just in case. This is the best I can do. This is my all time FP and my soulmate. For a variety of reasons our relationship needs to be kept secret, even though we've been pretty well behaved recently and things had really mellowed out between us. It's really just been a friendship for a while. Then, bam, this. Something has happened to her today. I'm not one hundred percent sure what that is; not sure if she even knew. The call was brief and stressful. She sounded scared. Something about the hospital and some other vague stuff. Then nothing. I should definitely be at her side, but I can't be. Because of the nature of our relationship and some additional extenuating factors I can't even call where she said they were taking her and ask to speak with her. Even though we've been good for a while, no one in her life knows about me.  She has a lot to lose if she got caught having an affair and a strange guy calling after her in this situation would be too much to explain away. I can't risk hurting her like that, but I'm losing my god damn mind sitting here not knowing a fucking thing. I'm stalking the social media of her friends and family for any mention of what the fuck is happening, but nothing. Not a peep. I guess I will take no news as good news, while I sit here and climb the fucking walls. I'm high as fuck, so I hope I've covered up our tracks well enough, but I needed to unload this somewhere. 

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