I (30f) hold back on myself a lot. I’m decently attractive I guess, I have a unique attractiveness? I get told frequently, but it gives me anxiety when people say it. I don’t believe them. I’m starting to get back out in the dating world- and while I know my personality is.. definitely unlike most, I can’t help but feel like everyone is way out of my league- that they are grossed out by me. I’ve gained 30 pounds during covid and while I’m overweight now at this point, my ex always told me how good I looked, or my very honest coworkers... I can’t help but feel so disgusted with myself. I used to be very fit, active... and now I’m neither of that and having such a damn hard time getting back into it. I’m just tired. Since covid I became a full time working, single mom. No time for the gym, I’m just drained. 

I haven’t been eating the best and drinking due to ending a relationship and just feeling pretty crummy. I want to be able to go out with someone I find attractive. I’m a lot of fun, funny, quirky, but at a face level I feel... just disgusted with myself. Anyone else?