I feel so ashamed to be admitting this but I'm damn near obsessed with my SO's ex. We've been together 3 years and to this day, I am CONVINCED he is still in love with her. Convinced he thinks about her all the time, convinced he compares me to her and where I fall short, convinced he checks up on her on social media, all of these things. I end up checking her social media and almost making note of "Okay....shes like this so if I'M like this, maybe he'll love me like he loves her?" I hate her and yet find myself wanting to be her. And it eats me up inside. It gets worse when I get worse. I know it's super unhealthy for me to feel and think like this and I can feel it. My insecurity is being projected, I know, but my emotions still convince me he's in love with her. And some days when it's not her he's in love with, I'll fabricate some hidden relationship he's hiding from me and is emotionally involved in. I am ALWAYS waiting to find out he's talking to someone else, in love with someone else. 

Has anyone else dealt with something similar?