I had a breakdown last year in January and February. I deferred university for a year to get a grip on my mental health. A lot happened. I was diagnosed with Bipolar type 2, started medication and I'm still finding the right combination, I'm also on the waiting list for both psychosexual counselling and Bipolar group therapy. Despite this, I don't think I'm stable enough to go back. I'm unsure if medication is making a difference, and the depression has just been crushing. I think being far from home sets off the worst of Bipolar disorder for me. I'm considering enrolling at a different university that is close to my family home in London. Being at home is better for me but I want to study the subjects I enjoy with peace of mind. So maybe that's better. This way, I'll have more time to do therapy and really find the right combination of meds. I'm not happy at all. I think a lot about death and that scares me.