i just lost all my friends because of an argument i had with my best friend which ended me slamming the door and almosy breaking it. now she keeps talking shit about me to everyone in our group and today everyone’s partying at her house except me because i wasnt invited.

i keep pushing my boyfriend away as well. i go through phases where i’m overly sexual and phases where i dont even wanna look at him and now is probably the worst of my phases ever and it doesnt seem to stop. i love him so much that i’d do literally anything for him but i keep pushing him away, i just get annoyed by his presence and i dont want to hug or kiss or be intimate. i just yell at the smallest things and isolate myself.

 i dont know what to do and i’m not finding anything worth living for, i’m helpless and the most of all angry at myself. i try my hardest to be the best person i can and i still find myself letting everyone down