
This is also sort of a vent .

I’m a college student and overall it’s been a huge adaptation for my social behavior. Especially with being on a sports team.

I’ve posted about it before, but i’m dwelling on it a bit more, especially since more recent events.

This past week has just been hectic, and i’m drained between physical health and school work/ exams. Having to go to practice and be around this teammate in general has especially been difficult.

He’s been why my anxiety has sky rocketed. Just the “affection” bomb and overwhelming presence he is just too much right now and before.

It’s gotten to a point where i’m starting to “break” so to say. I hate how his actions overwhelm me to such a high degree.

Yesterday I was at practice, we were maxing out fr bench, and I wasn’t doing well. I was frustrated, and taking a break. He decides to come up and hug me, he does this with a lot of teammates who he’s closer with. Due to past shot, I don’t like this type contact/ or anything like that, especially when I’m already emotionally exhausted.

I freaked out and panicked, and just felt a swell of anxiety. He’s done stuff like this before so i’m always on edge. I ended up elbowing him and told him to stop. He just backed off at that point and didn’t try to talk with me for the rest of the day, seemed quite cold.

I left practice early. He then proceeds to message me last night, saying he “doesn’t know why I act the way I do but hopes I can talk to him about it”.

I have told him to not do stuff like this, I thought I gave enough signs that I am not comfortable, but I hate feeling like my only way to get my point across is by hostility. Because that’s the only way he’s actually not.

It makes me look like an ass hole because everyone likes him, but i don’t know why i had to go to an extreme in order to get him to stop, I just feel like shit all the time.
It has happened before in different cases, but it’s still frustrating. I have to be around him a lot, but it’s too much for me a lot.

Thank you for reading.