“I don’t know if you are trying to push my buttons or what you think you’re going to accomplish.  If you were truly honest with yourself,I believe you would see not neglect and irresponsible behaviors by your parents, but love and support in all aspects of your life. You always had clean clothes, food, a roof over your head.  No end to activities and toys that you desired.  No child ever “asks” to be born.  In other words, you have never done without anything that you truly needed.
OP, if you want to feel sorry for yourself because your life didn’t turn out like you envisioned, go right ahead.  That’s not the path to positive change.  The only person who can change you is YOU!  
You have absolutely no right to judge me or your mom.  You have no right to judge our decisions. Until you have walked in our shoes your point of reference is nothing more than self-centeredness.  If you don’t like where your life is or the direction that it is going, it is up to you and you alone to change it.  No one can do that for you.  Nothing that you have experienced until now has given any valid reason for your unacceptable behavior. 
You were never sold as a ranch hand for tickets to Disneyland.  Your memory is faulty.  You were given an opportunity to experience a different lifestyle.  To learn skills and have experiences that most kids your age never get to have.  You didn’t wreck the Polaris, you drove the tractor through a gate and bent it.  You fixed it.  Something that most adults couldn’t do.
If you want to blame me for how your life is, so be it.  Until you decide you want to change then everything will stay the same.  I may sound harsh and unloving, but the “pity party” you’re trying to drag everyone who loves you through is wrong on so many levels.  
If you want to change your life I think that would be great!  Make a plan, have a goal, have a time line.  You have had opportunity after opportunity and squandered each and every one.  Step outside of your situation and think about Lyn (op’s partner of 7 years).  If you were her would you want to be with OP today?  What have you done for others without expecting any kind of renumeration?  Have you done anything just to be helpful?  I’m just asking because everything I’ve seen is just you being selfish and self-centered.
You want to change your circumstances, then change them!  You feel you need therapy, then get it!  Nothing will happen until you get off your ass and do something!
OP, I love you as much as any one could love their child, but you haven’t shown anybody that you want to change anything.  You just want to blame others and expect somebody to snap their fingers and POOF OP is fixed!  Positivity creates positivity.
Your mother was completely wrong and off base.  Matt didn’t cause anything.  After Beth was born your mom changed in ways I can’t even begin to explain.  I stayed married to her to protect you kids from her as much as I could.  Maybe I didn’t do a very good job but I tried and never ever quit.  I spoke with him after her meltdown and told him exactly what I just told you.  And now you’re acting just like her and it’s killing me to see.  You are an adult.  We all screwup from time to time.  Some more than others, but accepting responsibility for our decisions and actions is what separates children from adults.  Matt knows that he did things that were wrong but causing your mom and me to divorce was not one of them and I made sure that he understood that as fact with no gray in between.  She can blame anyone she wants to but until she points the finger at herself 1st and takes responsibility things won’t change.”

As much as he says “I love you” i don’t feel it. What should I do