Feeling like I lived my life under completely false pretenses.  Like people who cared could be successful too.  Took me so long to break out of the bubble and now I'm old and fucked.  Hate my life, don't like the world, really just see no reason in continuing but I just have to because everyone keeps telling me I've got something good going on?  But I have nothing?  And if I try to talk about it I'm trash?  Like they just shut you out, you know?  Don't see you don't hear you.  What reason is there to continue on?  Just feeling like everyone gets off on pain, and my pain, and I'm just not like that.  Feeling like people love to make me into a bad person and I literally have always tried to be as helpful as possible (within my means).

I don't think there is a reason for me to be on this earth other than to be used and forgotten.  I often wonder why I was born.