Looking for some kind of guidance. My anxiety creeps into every single aspect of my life and is making my life miserable. Therapy doesn't work because I can't get it out of my head that the therapist is just doing their job, medication helps a bit but not enough (I am on Wellbutrin and gabapentin, with Atavan for bad days). 

Things I worry about:
-losing my house (never missed a payment in 15 years)
-I worry that I am going to lose my job despite being good at it and one of the very few that can actually do my job
-I worry about social situations 
-I worry that I am ruining my kids lives
-I can't even have sex with my wife because I get so nervous that I can't perform that any time I think we are going to I have a borderline panic attack

I am so tired of constantly feeling like this. I feel trapped because I've convinced myself that therapists don't actually give a shit so I shut down when I have a session, the medications only dull the anxiety. My wife and I have a strong relationship but it has suffered. 

The general anxiety has been there all my life, but the sex stuff has been happening since one bad experience about 3 years ago when I couldn't perform so immediately my brain goes to the worst case scenario. I'd like to give therapy another try but I worry that I'm going to clam up again and it won't help. 

Any advice would be helpful