My life is a lie, I have stuff that I never wanted. My dream was to be free and explore the world and get to know genuine and friendly people. I don't know what changed but I can't find people who are like that, my mind always tells me that there's something wrong with them, that I shouldn't talk to people or get close to anyone. I have a girlfriend but I'm really lonely and not even her can get me out of this void. It's a waste of life, wish there was a easy way to end this. I don't find joy in anything anymore and whenever I'm driving I just feel like crashing the car. Not even my therapist helps with anything. I'm not this person living this life, I feel like a robot just doing what I'm supposed to do. I'm tired of suffering and dealing with overthinking and mental issues, it's draining my mind really fast and I'm pretty sure I might kill myself soon. I know people here aren't professionals and just give their personal opinion but I'm not looking for any help, just needed to vent since I'm a lonely person and I'm tired of talking to myself. Hope you people enjoy your life and find joy in the little things, learn to appreciate nature and the freedom of spirit and mind. Thank you.