Yea it is still hard to cope with most thing but at least I am able to do thing that I enjoy. I don't know is it because I just get fed up of doing nothing and start playing game instead? I still feel a void in my heart and the emptiness is still there but have I heal from it? I don't really know my own body anymore. I do continue to isolate myself but at least I try to show my face Infront of my family since they are to worry and force me to just be there.... I am still tired of everything including life. Dissapearing sound fun to be honest.