My one close friend in high school (I only had one during those tough years) has changed and so has a lot of other people. We were both druggies in Hs and we’d do crazy stuff like go to concerts, Black out, mosh pits all the fun stuff ;) we did this till I was 18 or 19. Now I’m 21 and she says that stuff is stupid and the emo music we listened to is stupid. She judges me for continuing using drugs. I always thought me and a few friends (her included) would live and die together doing crazy stuff. I hardly do anything now a days bc I have no friendS. Everyone is off doing better stuff. I just want to get a bunch of tattoos and piercings. I feel like the devil is inside me and I’m just crazy. When I try being normal it feels so fake. I hate putting on a smile when really everything inside is darkness. Everyone is maturing and progressing and I’m staying exactly the same :(