So I'm a 7th grade student with low grades 
(Mostly d and a little fs and some times c) 
I absolutely hate it how people treat you and judge based on some stupid letters
I was forced to be In a group project I was gonna ask my best friend from kindergarten if he wanted to be my partner until i heard his response before asking

I don't wanna be In a group with (my name) he is dumb as fuck and doesn't know how to do anything and hearing that just broke me and made me feel insecure

The teacher collected money from us like 2 people gave 5 dollars each while a single gave 10 dollars to buy some project that we are going to be doing 
My teacher  recommend me someone but I didn't want to beacuse I would be a burden to her 


The teachers always praise the good students while the bad ones (like me) are given death threaths (not literally) like you will repeat the grade if you don't know this you will struggle.
I don't have any dream I don't know what I wanna be I first said that I wanted to be a chef but I know that wasn't true 
I can't find the motivation and will to pick up a book 

I had a crush I liked her personality and looks until I realized that she had 4 boyfriends at the age of 13 I was trying to at least be friends with her but she kept ignoring me whenever I said hi she would often not say anything or rarely say hi back


I have extreme social anxiety and I am also extremely shy (reminder)

I have a friend which I knew him from 1 grade he is a genuine nice dude he is a nerd (a big one) and I felt happy around him until I told him about my past depression he started laughing at me and saying I was talking nonsense and kept reminding me that until 7 th grade 

My class keeps taking my school supplies mostly my pencil case and start playing football with it and throwing it around the classroom like some football and I keep losing my stuff like rubbers pencils and other stuff

Also I can't talk to any teacher beacuse I feat of losing my freinds beacuse I consider them as friends and I just don't want to be alone 

My dad is far away from where ei live getting treated in the hospital from a recent heart attack and my mom started constantly yelling at me and being mad at me 

I feel like everyone is ready for life while I'm just this blank space in the corner that everyone hates 

Should I just disappear?