Scared to start zoloft.. advice ?

OK so I know that these posts are probably happening a lot however I am petrified to start a Zoloft. Like ulcers bleeding, seretonin syndrome, brain zaps, plus side effects I’m scared. 
I’ve tried other medicines and they have not went well at all however I do not know if it was me and my anxiety or the actual medicine.
Back then , which it’s been a few years,  I had bariatric surgery and I’ve lost 196 pounds and still going. I tried Lexapro twice since losing the weight and it was awful for me ( but mine you I took it less than a week both times , 5 mg and 10 mg) so the next step is Zoloft because we want to have a baby and my psychiatrist and doctor suggested that.
My psychiatrist said we could start on 25 mg which is one of the lowest ones or even lower if I want but the lower I start the slower it will start to work? Idk! 
My question is how do I stop overthinking that I will be one of the people that have the awful side effects, and that it makes my life even worse than it is now?
The problem is I don’t have time… Like I’m in a wedding soon (maid of honor) and we have our wedding renewal in the fall and I want to feel better and I know these things take time but I simply just don’t have it.
And if I’m being honest if it wasn’t for all of my physical symptoms and then telling me it’s anxiety after a ton of medical test I probably wouldn’t even start medication right now because of everything important that I have coming up. 
But then I read the stories where it’s literally change peoples lives for the better and they don’t worry at all anymore and I worry about everything obviously and I want that. But I just don’t know if I’ll get that. And I don’t know how to get past this fear of starting the medication. 
Any advice or encouragement or constructive criticism anything is greatly appreciated! 
I do it all, I meditate, I work out, I do yoga, I do mindfulness, I do everything and I cannot get a handle on it mostly the physical symptoms.
My therapist says it’s because in 2020 I had bariatric surgery in July and then September 2020 I had to go back under to get my gallbladder removed. Then in 2021 I lost my stepdad, one of my most biggest support systems and best friends in the whole world, very unexpectedly. Then not even a month later I lost my for baby who is only eight years old, again very unexpectedly she had cancer of the blood. And my therapist says that all of these things can manifest and physical symptoms because my love language is physical touch so even when I feel calm and I’m still lightheaded and dizzy and have a headache and have the weird tingling sensations in my face and hands and my fingers are shaking that truly I’m never calm and I’ve had high functioning anxiety since I was a child.
Sorry for the novel but I just want you to understand my story and I just wanna see if anyone has been like me and how I’m supposed to do this.
I’m stubborn and I’ve been wanting to get past it for years on my own and I feel weak that I can’t and I know that that is not a rational thought but that is my thought because I hate medicine. I’m petrified to even take Tylenol or antibiotics I just don’t like not knowing what they will do to me.
OK I’m done with a novel thank you so much!