I'm so tired of this. I've dealt with anxiety my entire life unmedicated. I've now started seeing a psychologist who put me on Citalopram and Bupropion. 

The meds seem to be doing SOMETHING. I'm still anxious but i'm not actively trying to escape stressful situations which is good. Now my memory is just gone though and it feels like it's getting worse. Did I wash my hair? Take my meds? Did my wife mention this thing to me at some point? I have no clue. I've even had my boss comment on my bad memory lately and it's just defeating. One step forward three steps back.

Of course with memory loss and anxiety, floods in irrational fears because now you know your forgetting things and it just sticks with you throughout the day. "Do I have the beginnings of Alzheimer's or dementia? Is my life going to fall apart at 35?". 

I did a CNSVS test for ADHD and I scored in the 3rd and 9th percentile respectively on verbal and visual memory... like, what?! That's embarrassingly terrible.  All I can think to do is stay the course with the psychologist but it's all Telemed and 45 minutes is tough to get a game plan together.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my TED Talk. It was probably supposed to be on another topic entirely, but I just forgot...