Here’s the thought process that goes through my mind on a daily basis:

*I want to be more outgoing.

But I’m not an outgoing person, so that would just seem fake.

I want to be more motivated.

But what about my friends who know me as the laid back one?

I want to be more spontaneous.

But that’s not me…I am a careful person. I don’t make any sudden movements. Everyone will think I’m going crazy or something.

I want to be more this or that…

but I’m supposed to just be myself.

But I am not happy with myself.

But I don’t want to feel like a fraud.

But I really just want to make some sort of drastic change.

But then I won’t be the same person my friends chose to be friends with.*

And on and on and on. I continue to give myself reasons not to become the person I want to be—and all of these reasons are based in my fear of putting off the people who know and love me as I am now.

But *I* don’t love the person I am now—and I can either choose to settle and work on my self-love right in this moment, or I can choose to CHANGE—and maybe that’s what self-love is, anyway. Allowing yourself the freedom to change.

It’s so easy to look at the way that anxiety controls your personality, behavior, feelings, etc., and think, “Well, maybe this is just my personality, and changing it would make me fake.”

YOU ARE NOT YOUR ANXIETY.

You are allowed to change. Maybe some people will be turned off by those changes, but honestly that’s not as likely as you might think.

If you’re not happy with yourself, don’t let toxic positivity bs hold you back from becoming who you want.