I have recently been broken up with in my longest real relationship and I’m having such a hard time. He was my best friend, my lover, my comfort and would’ve been the father of my child if I had decided to keep it. We still speak and have sex often, because I would rather give myself to him for a moment then to not have him at all. I have been trying to act cool and seem fine because fake it till you make it right.. All throughout our relationship he had done something. He has told me things I will never forgive until the day die. I keep trying to remind myself of everything he’s done to make it easier to get over him but my mind just tells me all the good. This is by far the most toxic abusive relationship I’ve been in but on the flip side I’ve never been this happy. His good outweighed his bad, I would’ve given this man my soul. I even got attached to his child he had from a previous relationship and I have to move on wondering how she’s doing what she’s going to look like when she’s grown, it hurts. I wish we could be together but I know he doesn’t want someone with bpd, I do not blame him. He has his own mental issues and together we are just a beautiful disaster. I just want to hear ways you guys have gotten over your fp or relationship. I think about him all day everyday. I miss him so much. If you read through this thank you for listening…
EDIT: I know no contact may help get over him quicker but I can’t bring myself to it just yet. Please don’t advise that.