I feel like I have to throw up and I feel lethargic all the time. My arteries feel clogged also and I feel like I may have a heart attack. I’m only 24. The doctor said I’m healthy but wants me to get some labs done. I haven’t gotten to it yet. Also I feel like I’m losing my mind. I don’t know what to do next. I feel like a video game character who runs into a wall and their legs keep moving but they just continue to run into that brick wall. It’s like there’s nothing left to do. My head hurts just thinking of what to do next. I write in my journal to myself saying stuff like “you’re depressed but you only have this one life to live. Life isn’t going to move any faster if you stay in the house and sleep all day. I know you want to die but it’s much more likely that you’ll die if you go out and do things rather than staying in the house all day. So start living your life and taking risks because either you’ll become less depressed which is good or you’ll die which is good.” And even with my pep speeches, I still have no motivation to do anything. I’m going absolutely crazy. Something has to be done. But I don’t know what.