Oh my god, okay.
Within every post I talk about my bad relationships I'm trying to repair with friends and family and it's rocky. 
All because of my bpd, my behavior. Not that it's an excuse but rather a motive behind what I do and I take responsibility because I know what I'm doing it's just I can't control it. 

Recently, my friend of six months, this person knows me inside out probably. They're perfect from my point of view even though they're from a different country and the communication we have is limited to skyping, messaging, every media. Regardless, we know each other pretty well and I'm really comfortable with them. And yknow what this leads to? Being obsessive, thinking so much that they hate me and I'm annoying them, I'm a burden 24/7 in my head. Recently, we've became closer and both like one another so that made it completely worse. I already need reassures all the time and I hold back everything in me to not be so overwhelming. I really, really want to stay close to them and they're such a neutral and realistic person with no mental illness. 
Supportive and caring. They don't understand what I have or what it's like but they're here for me. 

That said, these thoughts constantly happening when they're just busy, actually busy. It's annoying and I find myself asking my friends 24/7 what I should do, asking them, needing reassurance. 
It's the most annoying cycle. 
Now I'm just distancing myself because I know everyone's getting annoyed or at least I've convinced myself that and I won't believe otherwise so I rather just not talk. 

I know, it's dumb but it's a minor or big problem. 