I don’t know what else I can say. My mother screams at me almost daily. She thinks me being tired is an insult to everyone else, since “i don’t do anything anyway”. My room hasn’t been cleaned in over a year. I’m failing all of my classes, cos I don’t have the energy to study and I hate my major. Getting out of bed is torture. Just trying to survive is made impossible because my anxiety. I’m constantly on the verge of suicide, hoping that someone hits me with their car, so I don’t have to take my own life.
The only thing I’m looking forward to is a concert I’m going to in April. I hope I can make it till then, but every day the idea of that becomes more and more surreal.
Welp, I’m going to go to sleep and keep on being a failure for now. Maybe this time I finally won’t wake up.