Hi, all! I hope all of you are doing well! 

I wanted to ask for some advice. 

Long story short, my family and I had a falling out last year. My brother and I had a huge fight, and he told me that he didn't want to see me at any family events ever again. The fight was, I think, mainly because he doesn't approve of my boyfriend, though he is very... disorganized in his thinking, just like my mom. My mom told me she thought it would be best if my boyfriend and I stopped coming to holidays to avoid future conflict. 

Fast forward to now, COVID present. My sister is visiting from out of state. My family doesn't take COVID, or at least the guidelines, as seriously as my boyfriend and I do. We social distance, wear masks, andimit contact with others. They do none of those things. 

My mom texted me last night, inviting my boyfriend and I over this weekend to see my sister who is visiting. I want to be truthful, but not callous or rude. I want to tell her that 1. Seeing my brother makes me feel so uncomfortable that I can't even go over to see my cat anymore. I've tried and have had panic attacks on the way back home. And 2. I don't feel comfortable risking the health and safety of my household. 

This was part ranting/part asking for advice, hahaha. I'm just really not sure what to do or how to respond. I feel like this is an impossible place to be, and it really triggered my anxiety. 

Thank you all 🙏🏻.