(TW: mentions of sexual assault)

when i was in high school i was undiagnosed and severely depressed at a competitive public high school. i was failing courses and when my parents found out i tried attempting and i was shunned for this. they did not want to be associated with me, so i faded into the background and lived like a dead person to them. i barely managed to graduate high school. after high school i moved away with a friend and decided to attend a local cc, things were finally looking up until i got r4ped by someone who thought was my friend, (who i got to know through one of my classes). for awhile i pretended it never happened, (trauma response), and just focused on my studies and my job. covid hit and i lost my job, i moved back home and did school online, i applied to schools last fall and i got into my dream school this past may. my parents acknowledged me for the first time in awhile. though i am proud of myself i've never felt this miserable in awhile. everything i had suppressed is coming to surface and i feel so lonely. and i feel so angry. angry at my parents, angry at my r4pist, angry at myself the most. i dont know what to do with myself anymore