I hope you all can understand my immense excitement for my baby and husband, and understand that none of this is the result of either of them. It’s me. 

I have my own home. I have a healthy baby on the way. Despite hormones, I am still making leaps and bounds with my entire recovery. But I’m lonely otherwise. There’s no girlfriends to show up and help me with my baby shower, there’s no other mom friends giving me advice, there’s no one to have tea with while husband is at work. My family is supportive but I feel disconnected from them. 

I watch all these people post pictures of themselves hugging other people. “Congrats girl, can’t wait to be your maid of honour on your big day!” “I can’t believe I get to be an Auntie to your baby!” “You’re my ride or die”. There’s just no one. I don’t deserve anyone, but it doesn’t stop me from missing it. Someone who wants to catch up and gossip and talk about our sex lives or go grab sushi with, someone who’s there when you need a pep talk. It’s daunting