It’s been a tough couple of weeks, I came out of self isolation on Tuesday and obviously haven’t seen him for a fortnight now. I had blocked him last Wednesday after he spoke to me so rudely I had a meltdown. I’ve not been too bad until now. He called me at midnight on Sunday because he was worried, he said he’d been texting me the whole time but I must not have got them as I was blocked. I don’t know how he didn’t realise to be honest. I forgave him and everything was fine, we made plans to see each other Saturday. I text him Tuesday confirming those plans and he said that he may be doing stuff with his sister as it’s Easter, so I suggested Tuesday instead which was fine. I liked his message and we then didn’t talk for a couple of days. 

I know he’s got a mate visiting and I had mentioned it would be nice to be introduced, but I’ve heard nothing from him about it and his friend leaves tomorrow. I was really bothered until I sent him a meme around 4pm just to see if he’d get into contact maybe. Nothing. 

It’s not nearly midnight and he’s not so much as opened the message. He has been online so he must have seen it. I wasn’t this panicky about texting but now it’s started to bother me and I feel unsettled, it feels like our relationship is really hit or miss at the moment and I can’t shake it. He has treated me badly in the past but I’m trying to move past it, but it’s kind of haunting me. It’s his birthday next week and I’ve bought him a really special present, but right now I feel like a mug. Someone please just distract me from these feelings, it’s all consuming and I feel super lonely.

tl;dr - feeling ignored by current FP and need some support