I F(18) been unhealthy obsessed with my gf 18(F) since we stared dating (16 months) but I don’t feel the same rush anymore. I used to have panic attacks and self harm because I could handle my feelings for her. 
It’s better now and I’m happy for it
The only problem is that my new FP is an older woman F(30) that I know because we play the same sport. I’m used to be obsessed with her before I met my current gf, and one of the reasons I found my current gf so attractive is because she reminded me of F(30).
I feel so guilty for liking her, but I can’t control it, I stalk her facebook and Instagram. I know that we are never going to get together because of the age difference and the fact that she has a girlfriend. But she’s all I can think about and I’m constantly (irrationally) worried that she hates me and all the other bpd symptoms. My gf knows I used to like her but she doesn’t know that it goes deeper than that.

I still love my gf very much and I feel extremely guilty.