:sighs: Where to begin? 

I guess this is just a woe is me post. Forgive me for that. 

I am 30 years old, obese, live with my dad, single, sort of have a job (work for a family member for really cheap because I’m a terrible employee for a “real job”), and I’m just so tired and exhausted. I also have a side hobby that I want to turn into a full-time job but I’m too broke to have enough money to run ads for it, so it’s really slow and that just adds to my depression. 

Am I trying to make my life better? I’m trying to eat better (this is so difficult) to lose weight. The doctor wants me down 20 pounds in 3 months time. I’d love to get gastric sleeve or bypass surgery but I’m lazy and can’t make myself put forth the effort yet to do the stuff needed, but that’s a different story for a different day. 

I don’t know why I’m posting any of this, I guess for attention. I’m pretty lonely and I guess that’s what makes me seek attention, I don’t know really. 

Everyone in my family is disappointed in me, I just know they are. One time, about a month ago my grandma told me “we have to take care of you, you can’t hold down a real job”. That was one of the most painful things I’ve ever been told in my life. Meanwhile I’m the person she calls anytime she needs help with something. 


Anyway, here’s my first post, I’m sure I’ll post more later. I hope you’re having a better time than I am.