Now, I don’t know if it is truly possible to make progress on your own without professional help, but I have seen some good changes in my behavior. I recently went through a break up about a month ago and was never really given an explanation as to why (and it was over text unfortunately) but since then we have gone completely no contact. Obviously, I was at first absolutely devastated. But then I began to realize just how badly I treated this person. I used my BPD as an excuse for lashing out at them or being overly paranoid constantly, and they had to leave me after 9 months of me acting like this for their own mental health even though they did not want to do so. I am very aware of the behavior after it happens and I can identify it. However, I can’t stop it before it happens. Is this normal to be self-aware of my own actions as a person with BPD? I know right from wrong and I can finally put myself in my exes shoes after the fact… but I just don’t think I can stop doing this and it’s bothering me. It’s a fight against myself and I’m very frustrated.