 After  30 years of living single in this world, I finally found someone who  absolutely accepts me for who I am, who knows my BPD, has even  researched about BPD, has calmed me throughout my triggers, and has been  absolutely patient with my sorry ass...

And  I can't help but feel I'm so unworthy of my SO. That anytime I can fuck  up, that anytime my SO might leave me. It terrifies me, and I just  somehow feel like I'm better off dying, because my SO deserves someone  so much more better than me, the broken husk of a human that I am.

As  I sit here downing soju bottles, I can't help but abhor myself, and the  slow pace in which I am improving my BPD self. My SO deserves so much  better.

Anyone feel the same??