I’m 15 female and I want to end my life. I have straight A’s do sports and have friends but I still want to kill myself and I feel like a piece of shit for it. It just makes me more depressed thinking how great my life should be even tho it sucks. There have been 2 big triggers for this the first was when I was 12 tryed to kill myself, I was young and no one believed me thinking I wanted attention the second was 1 week ago I was sitting on a beach in florida thinking holy shit I want to go walk into the ocean and not stop I wanted to drown myself in front of these vacationers and my family. Idk what to do I feel like I just need an excuse to live long enough to go get help but I’ve run out.