I have a lot of internal problems and I feel like my negative aura keeps people away from me. I think I'm a burden that drains their energy by just my presence. Makes me believe everyone secretly wishes I didn't exist... Even those closest to me. Sometimes I don't care, and sometimes I do. When I don't care, I'm mad at the world and when I care, I feel sad. I guess if I was able to feel joy like them, I also wouldn't want to be near someone as pathetic as me. I'm about to turn 23 and all I can say is that my life is a mess. For years now I feel like I don't belong among others. I know everyone talks bad about me behind my back, because I can't think of anything positive anyone would say about me.