So my boyfriend and I have a lot of similar issues(mood swings, many bpd symptoms) and we both have had abusive childhoods. 

Lately I've realized I might be getting kind of competitive. Whenever he shares info about the abuse he's suffered, my mind immediately jumps to "how can I top that" and I've been guilty of exaggerating stories in order to "win". I also exaggerate or make up mental issues I struggle with to make myself seem sicker, or to relate to his personal struggles. 

I know this is insanely unhealthy, and I'm lying to him. But it's instinctual, I don't even realize I'm doing it until after the fact. For some reason, I want to be sicker than him. I like playing the victim and getting attention(something I certainly lacked as a kid) from people. 

But I love him and don't want to minimize his trauma and dismiss it. In fact, he probably has things worse off than me. 

Anyone else experience these issues?

To be clear, I am very supportive of him and give him the validation he deserves and am always there for him. I love him so much, it kills me that I do this.