I’ve alienated my best friend of over 10 years and her mother. The things I say and do when I’m ‘spiraling’, especially when it is fueled by intoxication, are detrimental. I have done a lot of destructive things in the past and caused chaos or strife in many of my relationships (my boyfriend, family members etc.) but I have always maintained this friendship and my BPD is any other issues have never threatened my relationship with my best friend. This time though I have really gone too far—slapping her because she offended me, then I called her mom a c*nt. This all happened a week ago and we have spoken twice since then— I apologized and she responded cordially but that was it. It’s just scary to me that I got so out of control that I destroyed a decade long friendship. It doesn’t help that I have no other girl friends besides her, either. Ugh:(