The world’s passing me by. I feel like at every corner I’ve been afforded no chances. Like I was always doomed from the start. I know it’s not true. But rationalism doesn’t make it go away. 

I have everything. But none of the things that I place value in. I’m spoiled. I’m privileged. Yet time keeps moving and I have nothing to show myself that I have a reason to feel proud. to feel happy

Each member of my entire family is either extremely successful, personally contented with their lot in life, or both. I’m supplied with the universe, but in such shadows as the ones cast by them I hide like a black sheep. 

I missed out on everything I wanted to experience in the time that’s gone now. I wasn’t even given the chance. It’s like I may as well not even be real. 

I’ll be okay, don’t worry. I already feel better having typed all this out.