Up until this point I've been active in subs that don't help me and actively trigger me or encourage unhealthy behaviors. Like subreddits that encourage self harm or eating disorders, ones that feed my anorexic impulses like 600lb life. They make me feel like shit but I'm comfortable with shit, being healthy is the hard part. 

A few minutes ago I decided to stop and just try to feel okay. I started un-joining the subs and clean up my reddit so that it only helps or keeps me neutral. I'm going to try and take a step to healthiness on my own, without encouragement from my therapist or doctors.