I burnt myself with a lighter a week ago, the first time I’ve self harmed in months. When people noticed I tried to play it off like it was a smiley. My boyfriend knew what it was though and expressed his concern. I’ve been going crazy not being able to cut, I’m able to but I know it hurts my boyfriend and I don’t want him to think I’m too messed up for him or something. I feel like it’s the only thing that grounds me though, or smoking bud but that only makes me lazy. I’ve been avoiding the supermarkets alone because I know I’ll impulsively buy razors