I'm watching everyone I grew up with pass me by and it feels like I'm wasting my life away, I know I don't know what they're feeling on the inside but at least they've made progress towards their goals. I'm 23 with nothing to my name no college, no money, no car nothing. I've watched my life pass by while I just sit back and let it go. It feels horrible knowing how happy I used to be and how miserable I feel now. I never got to go to college parties, or experience the dorm life or anything like that. I messaged an old friend from highschool and he just entirely forgot about my existence but went on about how he's graduated from university and getting married. Watching old friends I adored have kids or graduate and start jobs and everything it feels so painful. It feels like I'm watching everyone from under water trying to reach them and get to them but I can't and I just get left behind. I know people say "oh ur only 23 it's not too late" and yeah I understand that but it doesn't make it less painful. I don't want to stay this way but I don't know where to start I lack so many skills and just basic common sense. I feel stupid, lazy and worthless. I never got my exciting 21st birthday with friends, never got to experience all the stuff I wish did and it hurts knowing I'll never get that time back. Part of me feels like it's helpless and I'm meant to be on the outside looking in, I constantly think about people in my past and if they remember me or would even care if I was gone.