I don't want to give any details, because my abusive partner who suffers with bpd may see this. 

How can I rationalise the difference between definite, violent abuse, and behaviours they swear are symptoms of their bpd? They are often one and the same, so I am in such a difficult situation, because I forgive those awful behaviours as if they were symptoms of an illness.

My reactions to their abusive behaviours are being called abusive, and have been for a long time, so the situation becomes more and more complex every day. 

When is enough enough?

This is flagged NSFW so the nature of the abuse is known upfront, though no details will be given for the same reason stated before.