It has gotten better and more manageable. But these symptoms make a perfect storm for depression. 

Right now I'm staying up on so much and functioning on the outside quite well. However these 2 daily attacks are holding me back from so much and I'm so very afraid of the depression, left unchecked. 

Everything is so raw and the stress never goes away completely. And feeling like its absolutely hard to exist is only temporary. Just needed to vent as I can only reach out to the few people in my life only for so much.