I haven't been seeing my therapist, nor am I on any medication now. I used to self harm but now I'm one year clean (yay)! 

Anyways, back to what I wanted to say.

I have been feeling so alone, the smallest things can make me cry. I constantly feel like I don't deserve anything at all. I have a boyfriend and a group of caring friends but I know it's not up to them to help me. I am the only person who's able to get me out of this. They can only do so much for me. Every time I have a breakdown, I try to keep it to myself because I don't want to be telling my bf that I'm crying daily? I don't think anyone would want that? I understand that I should talk to people and reach out to at least feel better, but this just happens too much, plus my friends can't possibly keep tabs on me all the time anyway. I feel so lost.. I am so sad. I don't know what to do. I will eventually feel better in a few hours but when the feeling comes, they just hit so fucking hard and I would want to hurt myself again. I just want to get out of this misery. 

 

Hope anyone who reads this is coping well with quarantine, we'll all get through this. 

&lt;3