The truth is, I was never always like this. I was actually (according to other people) a very kind and supportive individual. But what changed in me?

For one thing, I recently got blackmailed and while I don't want to go into the details of it, I will say it was a traumatizing experience that will alter my behavior for some time.

I also have a really stressful college schedule right now and due to my ADHD, I catch myself procrastinating at the worst possible moments. I even missed an entire quiz and I fear it could happen to my other assignments as well.

I noticed a common trend with the news media, whenever a tragedy would strike, they would milk the hell out of that story and hype it up unnecessarily (although there are some exceptions to where the news has to be negative like 9/11 or COVID). Notice how they never give positive stories that same treatment. Not only that but when these tragedies do happen, everybody needs to stop whatever it is they're doing and go into a collectivist rage and misery. If you don't comply, you are viewed as insensitive, sociopathic, or somehow believe that the tragedy is good for the world.

Combine that last paragraph with another important lesson I've learned from 2020: **Stop feeling happy about all the great things in your personal life and get angry at what's going on in the news**. This is the message I got from other people when I expressed any sort of positivity on social media. That positivity is selfish. Happiness shows you only care about yourself and no one else. And optimism is insensitive. With that in mind, don't be surprised if that mindset creates some bitter and upset people in the process.

Why do people genuinely agree with that philosophy? Or am I creating a strawman within a strawman?