my whole life, my dream has been to fall in love or be in a relationship. I realize how dumb it sounds but its true. I feel like I’ve never let myself be happy and have struggled with depression because I’ve never had it. I stop myself from feeling envious of my friends in relationships because i realize that none of them have what i want (or rather, the boyfriend i want). It’s always felt so cruel that the universe wouldnt let me have that one thing and that I am now embarrassingly old and at a point where everyone else my age has experienced it. But now, everything is ten times worse. My younger, and extremely competitive sister has started dating a boy that is EXACTLY the type of guy that I have always wanted. To clarify, I do not have a crush on him or anything, but like i said, he is literally what i dreamed of when i was younger. It feels like an impossibly hard slap in the face. It feels so cruel and unfair and I am having such a hard time coping. Worst of all, she prances around the house with him, practically showing him off. I feel like I’m losing my mind with rage.