I posted this on r/BPDSOFFA a few days ago, and thought I should probably post it here as well.

This is my BPD story, hopefully it will give someone who's having a rough time with BPD a little bit of hope.

When I was at my very worst, I was living with my (now ex-) boyfriend of and (now ex-) best friend in the one of the worst areas in my city. I lived amongst drug dealers and junkies, I was in a relationship with a sociopath and my best friend was seriously disturbed and abusive. My boyfriend tormented my cats and lived off my money, while my best friend manipulated me into cutting off almost all contact with my family, and eventually my ex as well. I was barely able to keep a job, I went horribly into debt and in many ways I'm fortunate to be alive, let alone sane.

In that time I experienced a psychotic break, dermatillomania, disassociation, self mutilation and manic episodes. Not to mention issues with anxiety, depression, a social phobia and body dismorphia. I was completely unable to regulate my emotions, I was impulsive in every way possible and chronically irresponsible, inconsiderate and sometimes downright indecent.

I destroyed my relationships with everyone around me, I did horrific damage to those closest to me and I did it with no regard for their wellbeing. I did countless other things to countless other people.

I'm lucky to be alive, I'm lucky to not be imprisoned or institutionalised and I'm lucky to have the amazing family that I have. I would not be here without them.

Two year later I was diagnosed with BPD, and now after 18 months of hard work and therapy (with zero medication) I am the best I have ever been. I have a wonderful relationship with my family, I have a great job, I'm studying full-time, am happily single and I'm in the process of starting a small business. I'm able to regulate my emotions, maintain healthy relationships with other people and I love myself. I'm stable, I'm a nice person to be around and I'm genuinely happy.

To those of you with BPD, I suppose what I'm trying to say is that it does get better. I no longer consider myself to be mentally ill. I have some unhealthy thought patterns that I'm still working on, but otherwise I'm almost perfectly normal, if a little more emotional/sensitive than the average person.

To those of you who have a loved one with BPD, I'm so incredibly sorry for the heartbreak you have experienced at their hands. I am in awe of your capacity and willingness to cope and deal with the difficulties that come with BPD. I cannot imagine the strength it takes to keep going.

To those of you who are trying to leave a relationship with someone who has BPD or trying to heal from the fallout, again I am so incredibly sorry. Please know that it was never your fault, that there was nothing you could do to fix them and that their pain, anger and misdeeds were of their own making. They can and will only ever get better if they choose to do so, and nothing and no one can make that choice for them. And finally, please know that often the best, if not the only, way for a person to deal with issues of over-dependence (for lack of better words) is to be alone. You have every right to walk away, and I know that it takes an incredible amount of strength to do that.

Sorry for the wall of text and I really do hope that this gives people hope.
Much love and big hugs to anyone whose having a tough day. I'm happy to talk about anything, if anyone needs/wants to.

:)