Like I try to relax and be myself. But then I'll say smth a bit snarky and if I'm looking back they really aren't that mean and literally all of my friends do it but I feel like such an asshole and terrible person. And then if I'm not pretending to agree w things or if I am showing my emotions I just feel like the people around me like me less and less. And then I go back to ppl pleasing to get rid of that feeling.

Like i just feel empty when that happens. Also almost as if my only purpose is to get validation.