It is a really good day here in Hawaii and it’s almost Christmas Eve. I thought I would get no presents but our neighbor gave us a pack of local snacks. I also see two of my friends tomorrow. Family took the dogs to the beach and had pizza on Monday. I know I say this often but I wish things were better. I miss the early days of my mental illness where I participated in many activities like volunteering, day treatment, and support groups. Most of this year has been spent at home with family or out on errands. I visited the city today and it reminded me of better days when I used to live in Honolulu and would bike places. I believe one of my friends with schizophrenia is damned but I don’t know the exact nature of what she is going through. I know it’s probably something bad but I personally don’t know what I can do to help. People say earth is a bad place but it’s such a beautiful day out that I want to have a good holiday season and be less tired and lethargic.