Any young ladies here ever experienced an older, narcissistic man making advances on you? I am 30 and my 20s as an undiagnosed "quiet" BPD were a total trainwreck of older men (55+) detecting my emotional vulnerability and preying on me. I never experienced a healthy young man being attracted to me, and never been in a "real" relationship. BPD/NPD relationships are very common because the narcissist is looking to control, and the narcissistic supply with BPD fears being abandoned in the relationship and thus puts up with the dysfunction. We are easy bait due to our impressionability, and possibly our trauma history involving abusive or absent fathers, and it ends very bad, very traumatically. 

The only relationship I ever had was being swept away as a 23 year old, by a 59 year old narcissist who love-bombed/idealized me. I was on the board of the directors at a nonprofit and just after meeting him, was given long, poetic letters stating he never "met anybody like this before" and "I've been waiting for you my entire life." The endless shower of compliments, expensive gifts and dinners, and proposals to take me on trips across the country were too much to handle for somebody like me who has been emotionally and physically abused my entire life, and never had any friends. I never had anybody talk to me like this before, so positively. This man I didn't know was saying he never had a connection like this before, and he wanted to marry me.  I later found out that the first four months he was pursuing me, he was still in a long-term relationship (with a psychologist of all people!). I ended up being in a relationship with him for 4 years and he took my virginity, part of his plan, even though I never wanted a sexual relationship. 

He controlled and emotionally abused me, and threatened to leave me if I had my own interests and wanted to do something on my own. The last 8 months of the relationship, he began devaluing me and the things he used to love about me were now being criticized. He suddenly announced he "needed space" and basically stopped showing up the the relationship. On my birthday, he cut off all contact with me and threw me to the curb like a piece of expendable trash. I found out that just days later, he was traveling around the country with a beautiful blonde I never seen before. A month later, he proposed marriage to her. I was still trying understand, just being recently abandoned. He consistently slammed social media with dozens of photos, and my friends and his family (who I established relationships with), were commenting how wonderful and happy they looked together. I lost my entire support network as they took his side, and these were the only people I ever had in my life.

Shortly after being abandoned, a 65 year old and married writing coach I hired out to help edit my book kissed me without my consent. That was the last straw for me and I haven't been back to this horrible space since. DBT has helped me learned how to develop boundaries and recognize unhealthy relationships.