I mean, everything. Not in the normal way of “oh I’m an inconvenience and bother everyone”, but more in a “I can’t live a normal life because I’m so stuck in my brain” way. Sometimes I feel so stupid because I can’t look at anything without associating it with something completely fucked up. I feel like this is a symptom of my BPD, but I have ptsd as well so it could be that. 

Here are a few examples: I can’t look at a knife or sharp object (especially razors) without imagining the feel of someone stabbing me in the eye with it or slicing me up. I can’t look at the word “therapist” because all I see is “the rapist”.  I can’t even use a toilet without getting paranoid because I ONCE heard a story about snakes in toilets... I live in Canada. And closets? Yeah there is ALWAYS someone hiding in the closet waiting to kill me. 

Does anyone else get this fucking weird about everything? It’s strange because I’m not paranoid about normal things in life, just made-up scenarios the will never happen. 