I am unable to enjoy anything. The child abuse and lack of support has left me with terrible health, wasted time and no confidence. My teeth and jaw are so fucked up that it causes me weird pains all the time and it’s too expensive to fix. My teeth are probably going to fall out at a young age. No one will ever love me. I am unable to have sex and I’m completely sexually repulsed because of PTSD while the entire world is so obsessed with it. I have no real friends and no family. No money. I’m absolutely disgusting. No one understands how badly my childhood abuse has completely ruined my life. I have chronic suicidal thoughts from my mother telling me I need to kill myself. It’ll never get better and I know that I have to kill myself. Everyday I am trying to come up with a plan to end it and everyday I am reminded that I am completely unable to enjoy anything in life.