im a 20F and my life is just a loop, im going to college currently and life just doesn't feel good. i have no desire to do my homework or tests and i feel like total shit. i haven't left my house in 3 days and i don't even want to. idk if im depressed but im definitely very anxious about everything and i feel like everything is always falling apart always. like my family love life school and future. i don't know how to express this feeling but i just don't feel good and haven't felt good in awhile. i hate my past and my present i don't know what im doing but im not happy. if i think about it my child self would not like me and that kills me inside. i haven't made a new friend in years and i dont remember the last time i hungout my brain feels like its numb and rotting and my body feels like its breaking down. help.