 

I have a crush on this girl in my college who is in another class. I myself have Generalized anxiety disorder and struggle with anxiety but still, I build up my courage to talk to her. When I first talked to her I told her upfront that she looks beautiful( and she really is and at that time I didn't know she had bdd) and then we shared contacts and talked over online for around 2-3 months I was the all the time initiating the conversation she never messaged me the first-ever time I had to start the convo but she talked when I messaged her and then just ghosts me for weeks, then one day we meet together in college where we talk about stuff and that time she told her about her bdd. I being myself gave her a book to read( tho she told me that she didn't like reading yet I still gave it anyways) after that after a few days of chatting she agreed to meet again and talk but I just asked her out for a movie because I really liked her. But she really got a bit triggered saying she can't be with me due to her problems and all and returned my book and told me that she can't hang out with me in college and all. Many of the time in college she just ignores me like I'm a stranger but recently she started initiating talks by herself whenever we meet in the corridors or stairs and she even left her friends group to come and talk to me, just small talks and then she just demeans herself saying the convo is getting awkward and goes off. Due to my own anxiety, I feel really weird talking to her in random places or around her friends, and I recently asked her if we could talk sometime over lunch or during breaks or just hang out, but she said she doesn't want to hang out. I don't know what to do, I think she is one of the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and I really like talking to her and really want to be with her because I really like her, but I think that she just doesn't want to talk to me or is just talking to me out of courtesy. I know what bdd can do to people and I wanted to help her and know more about her but she is just so much closed and doesn't want to share anything, I tried sharing my own problems with her just to show that she isn't alone and she sympathized with it but I don't know if she even acknowledges it or cares. I don't know what to do should I continue my foolish pursuit of her to accept me and for this impossible love or just leave her be.

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