The definition of “I hate you; don’t leave me” was defined for me quite clearly in the recent years.

I poured my entire life into you and never received anything in return, except black eyes, betrayal, and resentment. I used to cry and beg god or anyone who would fucking listen to let me wake up one day and feel nothing for you. It was almost like you stitched yourself in my skin, just to tear at the seams. I remember every drive we took, I would choose the most beautiful tree, imagine myself hanging from it, imagine you actually giving a fuck I was gone, imagine that maybe you never even noticed. For 3 years you have been eating me alive and soon I’ll have nothing left for you to feed on. It’s time to go, an hour I never thought this clock could strike. The thought of you leaving doesn’t make me feel like I’m suffocating anymore. 

###In fact, the thought of keeping you around is starting to feel a lot like drowning.