I have a gift of being “blursed” (both blessed and cursed) with a good memory record, but I’m still unsure of which memories are of true events and which are from my psychotic episode that I went through four years ago…

I’m currently back in rehab for the first since then… and yet I still don‘t know what’s the fucking answers to these questions:

* whether I’m a virgin or not;
* If yes, whether I got a peer from school pregnant five years ago;
* If yes, whether they delivered the baby or if they had an abortion;
* If yes, whether the daughter is still alive or died sometime in the past twelve months

I’m a religious person, and the first week that I spent in rehab all the way back in 2018 when I was sixteen, it felt like I was in purgatory; the trauma from that time also turned me completely asexual