I have a friend I work with and hangout with often who decided to talk to me after work about the way I was acting towards him. We went night swimming with some friends and at one point he kept swimming next to me and I told him to stop following me. I really just wanted to swim alone and was a little drunk but came off as rude. Also there was some times at work that I may have caught an attitude with him. After work today we talked for like 2 hours about it and I apologized. I admit sometimes he does make me mad, or frustrates me, and I feel bad because I care about him and our friendship and when I realize I was being kinda rude or shitty I go home feeling like shit myself. Things seemed to have end on good terms. But he told me he noticed that there’s another person inside of me. He’s not wrong. In my head I wanted to tell him the truth, but I feel as if normal people could never understand and we would just end our friendship right there. I would say when I told him to stop following me was the rudest I was to him. I was drunk, and I felt like he was babysitting me. Idk. I feel bad now though. 