I’ve been having so many thoughts and urges to cut myself, but I know that if I do it would be too easy to do again. But I don’t have energy to do anything and I’ve been ruminating all week because I was abandoned and now I fear abandonment of my other people I could reach out to, and I don’t have my therapy appointment until tomorrow and I don’t have to do anything during that time, except I should for study for a test tomorrow afternoon. I just don’t have the energy to do anything and have been dissociating (or maybe depersonalizing?) and thinking about cutting all day.