(I'm deleting reddit tommorow) . Recently I've been preparing myself to start over. It feels like I'm living in constant dread and pain. I used reddit as a form of therapy for a while now. I've met this girl who I love and we started dating. I'm a teenager with low self confidence and low energy most of the time and fell into a trap of exestensial crisies and nihilism. Youtube,instagram,reddit and 9Gag partially contributed to this. I'm constantly over stimulated and it feels as if I want to jump out of my skin. It's a really vicious loop. I can't even do a simple task without experiencing physical and mental pain. The toxic world of self improvement and jock culture messed me up aswell. The sudden drive and motivation comes from with in me. It's like my body wants me to move and exercise. Staying productive and focusing on school and relationships helps alot. I have good friends and an awesome girlfriend.

I'm young and it would be a shame looking back 10 years from now doing what I'm doing now. Time waits for no one. (I'm starting fresh)