I've been wanting this sort of promotion at work since I started working here in May 2016. I wasn't eligible for it until October 2016, but that's when things started to get really bad with my SAD. I missed work a lot, and I had to get an accommodation for missing so much or I would have been fired.

I know that I shouldn't be missing so much work, but it's almost like I can't help it. I just hate my job, and I'm so pissed that they won't give me this sort of promotion that I don't even want to be here.

My husband says that this is the BPD talking and I'm "throwing a temper tantrum." He says I should stay at work and "build a reputation of being reliable" if I want to advance. I know he's right, but I just don't care.

I'm so tired of doing this to myself, and I want to get better. I just don't know how.

TLDR; how do you cope with self-sabotage?