I am sick of being a diagnosis. This is why I didn't seek treatment for su long and that I don't tell anyone. My husband, patents, and siblings know along with 1 BP1 friend from 7th grade. I'm 42. Finally admitted for help 3 years ago after a manic incident. Whenever I get upset at my husband and his anger issues with our son he brings it up. Today he told me I was crazy and to snap out of it. Now I'm hiding in my room until he comes up here to tell me to snap out of it then I'll go for another 9 hour walk while he gets to play with our 6yo. I am alienated and alone. I cannot leave as is never get custody. I'm trapped for at least another 12 years. I have been married 25 years but I can't live as a diagnosis. 

Thanks for letting me vent.