This has always been an annoyance but it's starting to build up into rage. My boyfriend loves soccer and hockey and watches every game his favourite teams play. This is a busy season where there's a game every couple days at varying times - morning, afternoon, evening and night. And there was one last night, Halloween night, at 10pm. 

I HATE sports. I just hate everything about it, the ridiculous amount of money athletes make, the herd mentality of the fans, the culture surrounding it that just wreaks of toxic masculinity and alcoholism, and the fact there's literally no point to any of it that I can understand. It probably doesn't help that all my worst bullies growing up were jocks. 

I know my bf has every right to enjoy sports and I get that for him, it's a connection to his dad and as an immigrant he appreciates the internationalism of it. But even knowing that, lately just the sound of a hockey game sends me into a spiralling rage. I'm so annoyed with having to know the schedule of his games and schedule our lives around that. If it was a hobby like band practice I don't think I would feel that way. I know it's hypocritical.

In my head it's like "so all day you're not looking forward to hanging out with me or actually doing anything, you're looking forward to sitting on the couch and watching a completely fucking pointless game where they toss pucks around to each other."

I was looking forward to our plans on Halloween to go on a nice fall hike in the morning, go to his parents' restaurant for lunch and then hand out Halloween candy and have a couple drinks. But he was just stressed out and checked out the whole time and I feel like all he wanted was to come home and play video games and watch the hockey game. Like he just couldn't wait for it all to be over, this nice day we planned that I was looking forward to. And that makes me SO ANGRY.

This is a really intense rage and I know it's so ridiculous, it's just sports, but it doesn't feel healthy to bottle up this rage but also isn't healthy to expose my bf to it. So idk how to deal.