I’m a quiet borderline, but I have issues with keeping my thoughts and experiences to myself.  I tell people way too much about myself whenever I meet them, and I talk too much about my trauma and issues. I have this need to have people understand why I behave in certain ways, and when something reminds me of something that happened to me or something that’s bothering me then I can’t help talking about it. I feel like sharing these things will make me closer to the person, and make them trust me. I also end up talking trash about people I care about because I get unreasonably frustrated about stupid shit and have to take it out somehow so i don’t hurt the other person :/.
It takes so much effort to not blow up at people all the time and I control myself so much but it still spills out into other areas of my life. 

I don’t want to be like this because it’s very off putting to other people. I don’t have many friends because of my shitty personality. I hate myself for talking too much and not being able to have a filter. I also say embarrassing stuff to try and fit in or make people laugh. 

Idk, I’m kinda ranting with no direction but I don’t really even know what my actual opinion is on anyone or anything. what I want to do with my life changes so often, it’s incredibly frustrating. I don’t feel like a real person.  I wish I could just be normal like everyone else.