Writing this as i feel a bit overwhelmed by sadness tonight

I have a pretty important certification to pass next month,  which I have spent hours preparing for on top of my 9am to 7pm job, as well as most of my weekends since last August. But I am realizing I don't even really like my work nor the field I am in anymore. It's just too much stress. For the sake of what? money? yes I make quite a bit of it and maybe I should feel ashamed of even complaining while some kids are starving in other less lucky parts of the world. 

But I feel empty. I feel like I don't live enough, don't experience enough, like I am just some kind of robot roaming through life and doing what he is told to. A "good boy" that does what society wants him to do.

Music is the love of my life. I have always wanted to be a musician. When i pick up and play my guitar it's like I m going to some other place and I just feel pure joy. Nothing else matters. I had an ex told me I looked like I was enjoying it even more than sex. And that's probably true. It gives me emotions that nothing in this life can compare to. 

But if I continue on the path I am on, what will happen? I (currently 31yo) will reach 80yo and tell myself: "I made the wrong choices"? this sounds like an absolute nightmare.

I took the comfortable/easy way, but I already feel like I have wasted quite a bit of time doing something that would just "please others" and make me "look good" by our current standards. It's all a scam, and not what being happy is. 

Sorry for the poor writing skills but english is not my native language