I think I've reached a point where being single is a moral requirement. I don't want to drag anyone into my bullshit, and my solution for this previously was to date god awful people because it seemed like a level playing field. Now, I want someone that's smart and beautiful, but I know I don't deserve it. Nobody should have to put up with my shit. I'm also just straight up creepy, imagining myself with someone I barely know. The loneliness, however, is gnawing at me. It's nobody's responsibility to fix that for me. It's my own fault. It's like when a license is revoked for breaking the law. I don't deserve a partner because I won't abide, well, human decency. I guess this is more of a rant than a question. Maybe I can do it right, and I should just text my crush. I can already imagine the rejection. The spilling of my blood.