I was diagnosed with double depression 6 years ago. Back then, the antidepressants gave me serious suicidal ideation and I almost acted on it. I really tried to work on myself. I have been in therapy for over 2.5 years now. I even restarted medication after going back to my previous psychiatrist. He made me switch 3 medicines in 10 months. Nothing seems to help. I just want to feel better. I have severe PTSD from childhood trauma and sexual assault. Right now, I have everything I could’ve wished for, I’m doing well in terms of my career, my friends are great, my parents have made an actual effort to mend things, and I have a healthy relationship. But I still don’t feel better. I really, really want to feel fine. For once in my life. I don’t even know what fine feels like.