Hi all, 
I know that a lot of you will be too familiar with this, so sorry if my post is generic. but I’ve been trying so hard to get over my fp of three years and it feels so impossible and draining. No matter how hard I try It just doesn’t work and sometimes trying to stop my unhealthy thoughts is even more exhausting. He has left me a few times and has come back each time (each time was my fault) but it’s just taking a lot longer now which makes things worse. 

At the same time, I know other borderlines personally and they don’t get this distraught over their fp. I know that not everyone’s experience would be the same but it makes me think something is more wrong with me and I’m pathetic. 

Anyway, I guess a part of me just maybe doesn’t want to let go but at the same it hurts too much to not and I don’t know what to do. 

Thanks for reading ☹️