you have no idea how this makes me so excited and happy ✨✨💗 ! !

this year been soooooo hard for me, and since february I been crying almost everyday, Its usually because of how my FP isnt texting me 💔 im so dependent on him so it feel like the end of the world when he doesnt give me attention or validate my feelings 😭💔💔 

today, he didnt text me and my anxiety attacks were off the roof 💔🔪 but I still didnt cry and I feel fine about it all for the first time in so long, is this what people without bpd experience daily? where they just accept the fact and try to keep themselves busy????? :o

I kept telling myself, there is always another day where I get to talk to my FP, there is always another day where i'd not get anxiety attacks, it will pass, its not the end of the world, i will 💗💗 survive 💗💗 and crying about it wont change anything for me or make him text me, it will just push him away which is deff not what i want 🥲💔

im so soooooo proud of myself and I almost wanna text bomb my FP and my friend to tell them about this but I will wait till tomorrow 💗 💗

this is a major progress for me and im so happy and proud of what I did on my own even when I could have easily freaked out as usual, but I choose to be better this time and hopefully again and again 💗 I know this wont be the norm for me and I know I will fail couple of times in the future but its okay I will keep trying and trying ✨✨💗💗

I hope everyone else is having an equally good day ✨🌱