i feel like my fp has fallen out of love with me.

normally i convince myself that people are leaving me, and i work to convince myself that someone would never stay. i avoid feeling alone by never letting myself rely one someone's company. 

but in this case i am worried that i am convincing myself to stay with someone. that the signs are there, and i am avoiding be alone by keeping someone's company when really it would be healthier to not rely on them, emotionally.

how do i know? it stops feeling real after a while.