So… I just registered account for kind a privacy, there are people who know my reddit username and me. I’m not paranoid but it is what it is. 
I just don’t know what to do with my life. Since start of covid things become super bad for me. I lost my job and had to leave university because of that fact. The main issue now is money, I know it. I’m job hunting for a very long time. 
I started to feel disappointed about this world during the covid. I had no criminal record, excellent credit score, job, hobbies and was good at university. I can go on, but I don’t want this post to be about my existential thoughts. Just losing a job is tough strike. 
I’m afraid of everything, things are snowballing in a bad way. I’m kind a in giga debt. I just afraid to ask authorities any kind of social support and etc. I’m getting panic if I hear suspicious noises at my door. (at least used to when I moved it)
Mostly I’m sitting at home with feeling that my life is literally empty without job or university. Trying to learn new skills sometimes, job hunting and most of the time just playing video games. And now I personally not much motivated to tryharding this life and on the other side, can’t kill myself. I’m living alone, and I’m single. Parents pay my rent and cover some life expenses (not much but I can eat something at least). I used to be a person who buys new phones every 1-2 years. Lol.
I just don’t know how to start. Finding a therapist? Keep seeking for job and get hired? I know that my fail that I didn’t apply for low paid jobs for a while and my debt rises. Here in eastern europe I will pay my debts for maybe around 3-6 with something above minimal wage. Moving to another country? I’m not a professional at something. And I have to fix some documents to be hired in EU. And disclose my real address, phone number so collectors can bang my everyday… 
I had been in mental institutions in past, any form of hospitalization will be judged by my parents from whom I’m financially dependent right know. They are conservative and think that it is “all bullsh**”. 
I know that I personally failed a lot and my situation is that, and many others will not do so bad at my place.

TLDR: I lost almost everything and I don’t know what to do. Because being too anxious about being tracked by collectors, lost big part of my motivation and procrastinating a lot. Now I feel that my life is empty and I don’t know what is my number one in todo list. 

PS: Sorry for my bad English ;(