My fp left me in january and i've been absolutely broken since then. i fucked up really bad because i couldnt keep my stupid mouth shut.
all this time i've tried to contct him but he's blocked me everywhere. so today after trying with 3 emails he replied. i asked if we could be friends and talk. he said he doesnt want to talk to me or be friends. and that "I make him feel uncomfortable with how I am". that really hurt me. i cant help myself

I cannot do this anymore and i am on the edge of killing myself right now. i'm so tired of being sad. he means the world to me and i cant get over it. i have no friends i could talk to. just talking to people in general is hard because i've been alone for a long time now. my online friends dont want to talk either because they are all mutual to him and of course he has told them that i am a crazy person. he said in the email to leave him and his friends alone. it offends me because they were my friends too. and now i have no one.