24, no family left, have 0 friends and huge trust issues, can't make friends because of either trust issues or im really bad at making friendships, struggling at Uni and work since depression keeps getting worse, tried a couple of psychologists but nothing worked so far in the last 3 years.

I can't find joy in anything anymore, no matter how hard i try, been off the pills because i can easily change my mind instead of keep going and ingest all of them in one go. 

Tried to find help in the internet and ended up here.

My life was nothing but pain and misery, but my grandma always gave me the strenght to keep moving forward, but lost that motivation over 1 year and half ago when she passed away and currently i've been just "living", not sad, but not happy either, just numb and tired.

That's why im here writing this, to ask tips from you guys more experienced in life than me on what should i try to do. 

I know im not special, and there are more people suffering too, but i would appreciate a small tip from you kind people to try to either get better or find joy in living.