Hello redditers, I am so happy to be able to read everyone on this BPD site and hear stories and feelings from people who are going through the same thing as I am.

Long story short, I had a terrible childhood, terrible parents and a bullying story in middle school. After this, in 2017 I was diagnosed with depression because I was always so sad. But after showing so many BPD signs and ruining my relationship because of jealousy and disassociation events, I finally went to get a second opinion and was diagnosed with BDP traits.

I have been taking anti depressants, and going to DPT every single week, doing my homework, reading about BPD so I understand what is going on with me, practicing control with my feelings and learning about grounding techniques.

I did get back with my boyfriend, who decided to support me and both of us are working hard to get through this. Whenever my jealousy or my fears and insecurities kick in, he knows how to handle it, well he is practicing. He listens and reads the articles and material I work on in DBT. It is still hard, 3 weeks ago i had an anger outrage and it was difficult to get through, but we did. 

I know so many people with BPD have little to no hope of getting better, every case is different. but what really makes me so sad is reading posts on other pages talking about how BPDs cause trauma and we are not lovable and we are abusive and mistreat people. I do see it, I did mistreat my bf. But we are responsible for getting treatment and for trying our best. I do feel terrible about the event that caused the breakup, I hurt him really bad, but now it is my responsability to take care of my mental health and do efforts on my side for it t work out.

I know it is difficult for a lot of us to stay in DBT, to even make a choice to get better, but I promise it does get better. I am writing this from a warm place in my heart full of love, and hope to make things great with my partner. and if anyone ever needs to talk, I am here.

Thank you for reading. Everyone take care and stay at home!