Hello.

My partner and I have been fighting a lot lately. She is my first long term partner. 8 month. We live together. We keep trying to talk but it doesn't help more than 1 night. A lot of the fighting stems from how easily overwhelmed I am, how I don't deal with stress well, and how sensitive I am to her getting annoyed with me. When this happens and I try to explain why I am upset it makes her feel atacked, like she is being told how bad she is. 

Today I had an interview which stressed me a lot.  While it went well the interview also reminded me of other stresses and I ended up feeling very overwhelmed again. I told my partner some good news and she was initially happy, but I was already triggered and this became obvious. My partner kept offering advice on how to deal with the situation I was spinning about but I was being unhelpful due to overwhelming "hopeless" feelings. 

I started wallowing and complained out loud that I was hungry but couldn't eat because I started working again soon. I was complaining out loud because "everything is terrible" feelings were taking over. My partner took this as : "Please make me food". My partner does most of the cooking by choice but this is not something normal that I ask for so I don't think it as doing 'the usual'. My partner was just trying to make me feel better and stop me complaining. But I have a bad relationship with food and we have talked about this before. I cannot eat when I am spiralling. 

I tried to tell my partner I didn't want food but they didn't want to listen. I said it again 2 times before they got fed up and asked "What was I meant to do instead?". I said I just wanted them to be with me, sit next to me or something if she had to help, and she got SO angry. They said that it was very unfair because I made her feel bad again and I never said that I wanted her to sit next to me. (I didn't, but it'd have been better than being told I need to eat. Really I wanted to deal with the overwhelmed feeling myself but by complaining to her I gave my parter the idea I was asking for help) Well she stormed out of the room and is refusing to speak with me. 

It has been  5 hours so far and she still won't speak to me. I am spiralling hard. I don't know what to do. In the past she keeps talking about breaking up when she is mad, and now I am sure this is it. When I asked if I needed to beg she said to go away and that she doesn't care about us anymore.  I don't know how to deal with your partner not talking to you. She says I just need to deal with it and it is up to her when we talk again. My feelings are telling me there won't be an "again". She says she can't waste another night of worthless talking since it never fixes anything and we keep fighting anyway. I am scared. I don't understand how to continue after this. When she finally decides to talk with me, if at all, she will get mad again if I bring this up. How do I pretend that things are normal after this.

Please help. I do not know what to do. Coping skills are appeciated. But please I need advice on this situation too. Thank you.