I always have the thought in my mind that I'm just looking for attention. That I'm not really mentally sick, I just want attention and that I'm a fraud.

Then I have to remind myself that I in fact do not want attention if I am telling no one of the thoughts I have or how I feel and I do everything in my power to hide my inner struggles from the world.. 

I've struggled with self harm since I was 11 (currently 26 and I wish I could say life got better than it was when I was 11 but I think it may be worse). I would find ways to hurt myself that would leave little to no marks bc I didn't want my mom to find out bc she would yell at me. Yet why do I feel like a fraud when I hurt myself? I mean, I get the urge to hurt myself, why can't I accept that I really am sick and in need of help? 

Now onto my next struggle - trying to work up the courage to ask for help