I can feel myself slipping into a deep depression. I just feel empty, sad and extremely exhausted. I really can't cope right now. I'm trying to figure out if I can reverse the process and build upward momentum instead yet I feel powerless to change. My body is just automatically shutting down. I don't want to die I just want the pain to end. To put a fullstop. But maybe that's the problem. I need to allow the pain to come out. To fully express itself. To bear witness to it, validate it and make peace.