When I am in depressive stages I especially feel tremendously insecure and jealous, of my friends and especially of my boyfriend.

However, we are in an open relationship (2 years together. Me F21 he M24). I proposed it because 1. it gives me more security and makes me feel that I am not locked up and 2. I tend to erotize my relationships and I feel the need to have sex/kissing with anyone I think appreciates me a little. But the other side is becoming unbearable, although he has not been with anyone, just imagining him enjoying with another person seems unbearable.

I have always been jealous, but I feel that I am especially now and I think it is because we hardly talk about intimate things, about other people (not even an "oh I think she is pretty"), etc., because he doesnt like to. When I had a boyfriend in high school he used to tell me everything (with which porn he masturbated, who besides me liked him, about his ex gf etc) and I feel that it made me feel better because I felt there was nothing hidden. 
I think that what causes me the most anxiety is not being able to know everything, having control over everything, etc.

I would like to know if this happens to someone else and if it has worked for you to be totally explicit and open, or if it was worse.