I wake up and I’m instantly sad, I just to stay in bed all day but I was telling myself I’m just being lazy and doing daily activities feels so exhausting. I force myself to get up. When I am feeling happy i think myself into a depressed mood again. 
I offer with social anxiety so if I know I need to speak with someone then I’ll panic and my heart races and I will say 1 worded sentences, I dread eating at the table and being asked questions. 
I overthink everything I say, thinking did I say something wrong, or hate myself for speaking to little. I want to say things more than I do but it’s like something stops me, or I fear that I’d be judged. I keep telling myself I’m just overthinking and that there’s nothing wrong with me.
I am a very awkward person who just wants to be quiet all the time and only speaks when I’m being spoke to. I genuinely feel like I’m trapped because I have a lot more things to say but always so scared and worry. 
And say like I’m sat in the living room with my mum and she goes out to do something, I hate being left alone because all my negative thoughts come back and I feel down again. I find talking exhausting...