Hello, sweethearts, 

Let's see... I've been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and Major Depression for a long time now. I've been hospitalised after a few suicide attempts and being engaged in self-harm.
I'm recovering from depression, sure, but now I'm terribly scared that I'm falling back into its claws... 
I've started university in September and it has been a huge disappointment. I though it would be much better than high school was. I dropped out A levels twice due to depression, it was frustrating since I couldn't concentrate and I felt terribly stupid, it was a neverending cycle... 
Now that I've started college, the neverending cycle has come back. I'm frustrated, I feel useless, sad and stupid. Frustration turns to anger and although this anger is usually directed towards myself, if I have an argument with someone the guilt consumes me. Frustration turns to sadness too and when I was sure self-harm was over for me, I've relapsed... My boyfriend even paid a tattoo for my scars and now I have new ones, in the other arm. I feel awfully guilty, now only with myself, but with my boyfriend, my sister, my mother and my friends.
This is turning into Hell again and to be fair, I think I'm even being selfish with all these overwhelming feelings about the university. I think my sister is falling into an eating disorder, everything's a mess. My life, my brain, my heart are a mess and everything is crashing down around me. 
I know my problems may seem but little to you but I need some advice, help from someone that can understand my problems with BPD. Is someone here studying at the university? How was it for you? Do you know what can I do to help my sister? How can I avoid self-harm again...? 
I'm sorry for asking so many questions, I'm just really lost. 

Thank you.