So a bit of a weird one and I’m new to Reddit so if I’ve got anything wrong - Please correct me, I hate being that person! I’m a mum to two gorgeous toddler boys (2yr and 3yr) and I’m a high functioning BPD (medicated and have been through therapy and find that I cope quite well nowadays apart from in Crisis. My parents both have mental Illnesses, but my Mum (54yr) is a typical BPD herself and won’t go and get help (which is why I stuck so hard to therapy and meds bc I don’t want to be like her as a mum) we get on really well these days and I am her main support as her parents were very emotionally abusive and my dad is bipolar and an addict so she had to raise me and my sister on her own. However, three weeks ago she booked a holiday on a whim for me and my kids and her (my partner can’t come bc of work), and I’m very grateful and looking forward to my boys experiencing a plane and a new country etc, however over the past few days she’s been having a rough time mentally (we fly tomorrow). I’m getting concerned about being responsible for two young children and my mother in a foreign country now her mind seems to be struggling, although at home I can deal well with her, I’m worried about hitting crisis mode out there if she has an “episode” and I’m just wondering if anyone has any advice about coping with her if it does go tits up out there, my mental health is very stable these days, but without my partners support I’m concerned about coping with it all on my own. We’re in separate hotel rooms as I keep the boys protected from both my parents and part of that is making sure we have a “safe” space to ourselves - ironically I find the kids don’t trigger my BPD and I’ve coped very well with motherhood (learnt when to take time out, how to brooch naughty behaviour, how to deal with mess and chaos) but with my mum i don’t have that added “maternal” care that helps me cope with the boys. Not going isnt really an option as she’ll then get nasty about it, accuse me of not wanting to spend time with her, abandoning her etc and expect every penny back (from a holiday I can’t afford, haven’t asked for and wasn’t involved with the booking or planning of) - I don’t mean to sound ungrateful if that’s how this comes across, I don’t have the financial ability to take the boys away myself and I also really enjoy being with my mum when she is well and stable.