it’s Christmas and im supposed to be happy but instead im letting go of my ex gf after breaking up in May. I know it’s a no-no to stay friends after a toxic relationship but at the time my bpd was at its worst and i was so so afraid of being alone. i was really suicidal without her in my life. so today, we blocked each other so we have absolutely no contact. idk, she treated me like absolute garbage yesterday and today said she felt everything else but love for me, so idk why i got a lump in my throat. im the one that initiated things. and im not as afraid of being alone anymore so idk why i feel like crying.
im not gonna like go kill myself immediately over her but i just want someone to tell me it’s gonna be ok :( even if im completely alone now(she was kinda my last friend), it’ll be ok, right? ill be fine, it might sting, but ill be fine, yeah...?