I posted a comment on another sub about how I'm constantly tracking my nutrients on Google (not even that true anymore anyway, haven't done that often for ages, especially having recently discovered my levels are good, omg why do I talk shit) and woke up to multiple comments mentioning an app I should be using instead, with one or two being like "why r u doing that" type thing. They were literally trying to help and I already knew there was an app I could use for this but for some reason my brain locks up at the thought of trying new methods. Is that a BPD thing? An anxiety thing? Some stupid connection to childhood experiences? I wouldn't know but it makes me look dumb as hell.  Anyways my brain was firing alarms like "skla3, we are under attacc" so I deleted my comments. Like, a healthy person wouldn't have minded, would have accepted their Googling method was silly and would have appreciated the help. I just feel core shame. 

I usually hide my petulant stupid 3 year old self effectively enough but she still comes out at times. I'm gonna go distract myself like the fake adult I am.

Preparing for bluntness. Go ahead, it's my fault for talking crap. Can I just not have no emotional skin anymore? Ugh

