I was recently discussing this topic with my siblings and it hit me pretty hard. I didn’t have real life experiences, I wasn’t parented in a way that I know how to do real life, normal things. How to cope, how to have a normal non toxic relationship. My parents didn’t teach me how to tie my shoes or how to do my hair or even the difference between “left” and “right”. Everything I learned was from television.

It almost feels like I’m acting daily. Like I’m not a real adult. I don’t know how to explain it. And I’m a parent myself, which makes it even more convoluted. 

I’m the second oldest of quite a few children, so I raised my siblings pretty much. I probably changed more diapers than my mother ever did. I cooked meals for my entire family daily starting at 9 and that lasted until I left the house at 19. My mother is a narcissist and my father a drunk enabler with PTSD (Army vet). They have YET to acknowledge the shitty childhood we had and she actually acts like it’s all in our heads.