Support bpd groups tell me this is hopeless and so I need people that don't believe it's hopeless. I love her to death and my world is ending. 

Tldr: she sees me as toxic and manipulative when I'm sure I'm not, having most likely my last talk with her tomorrow, and thus my last chance. I'm not sure if she still loves me but she might, however in the past month she's gone from simply believing we shouldn't be together because "we are toxic to each other" yet still loving me, to seemingly hating me extremely. 

It started out nice enough, a long distance relationship that went on for 3-4 years. Slowly but surely things began to get worse and she would start breaking up with me more and more over things that I could never understand the reason for. This has been my first serious relationship in my life and she told me that she was determined to be with me and that she saw us as soul mates. 

The thing was every time she broke up with me I had to fight to get her back. She rarely came back on her own and last May I left everything and made the 1000 mile trip to see her as a desperate attempt for her to still be with me. It lasted about 6 months and then she broke it off again, for reasons that seemed to go along the lines of her friends making her choose between them or me. To my knowledge whenever things went bad she would talk to her friends about it, and now her friends have a terrible image of me and whenever she goes back from thinking I'm a bad person, or is on the edge between zones, her friends insist to her that I'm still evil and toxic, etc. 

In October I almost was able to get her back, and we opened a year lease on a place to rent together. Her name is the only one on the lease. We stayed in this new house together for about a month, and then things started getting bad again. She would go to hang out at a new friend group's house for a few days, and when she came back she would be extremely cold to me, and insist we were terrible for each other and she didn't see a future with me anymore. Many hurtful things and anger, all while I was cleaning up after her cats and making her food when she got home, etc. After about 3 days of being with me things would calm down and be okay, and it would feel like she would start loving me again. But then she'd go hang out with this friend group and the cycle continued. 

In December she decided she wanted to move in with them because she wasn't happy here, even though I thought I was making her happy, and she gave me the choice to let her go with them, which seemed like what she wanted, or to stay here with me, where she said she felt like she would explode after 2 weeks. I wanted more than anything for her to be happy and to not seem manipulative to her, so I let her go, with the hope that after her getting back on her pills and seeing a therapist, she would be okay and want me again. Instead she picked up smoking (because of her friends), and the promise from her to call twice a week quickly dwindled into nothing. She did start her pills and I think she's seeing a therapist, but it's only made her colder toward me. She and I were splitting the rent for our place down the middle, and I am the only one living here now. 

Yesterday she says that she's going to stop paying for this place because she can't afford it due to her own reasons, and that I need to find a better paying job or get a roommate by the end of the month. I asked to call to talk about this, and she said she was done with calling. She would be open to talking about it in person, but someone else would be there, as she said she no longer feels comfortable talking to me alone. I have student loans I'm paying off and this place was for me and her, so I have no interest in finding a stranger to take up what was her bedroom, and I can't find a job to pay for this place while living alone and unhappy. 

I have some friends I've made down here that offered for me to stay with them, where I would be paying much less per month, as well as it being closer to my job. However I don't want to dump the lease on my former gf because it would hurt her credit as well as destroy our relationship. I really still want her back and she is unreplacable to me. I don't know what to do but I need magic words to say tomorrow or at least have a little bit to go off of because it's my last chance to save my relationship.