I went out for a cup of dragonfruit boba. This month I keep wanting to shop but it’s more of an intrusive thought and it is ruining my goal of saving some backup money. It’s nice and sunny and windy outside and it reminds me of days when I was doing better. In the past I was higher functioning and always had something going on such as day treatment, part time jobs, support groups, etc. Covid coincided when with a relapse and life just isn’t the same since. I keep looking at stuff from [forever21.com](https://forever21.com). Their clothes are too young for me but sometimes they have nice hair accessories and bags... I at least want to wait till next month to spend any more money besides on food. I spent $400 this month but at least most of what I got can be used. Lately I feel paranoid from going out and I just feel like anything I do can somehow be harmful. I just want to have some goals or things to look forward to. Here is a picture of the new house being built.

&amp;#x200B;

https://preview.redd.it/zc4g25gmiak81.jpg?width=3264&amp;format=pjpg&amp;auto=webp&amp;s=f244869b35e6ca32c6440f3067a17209c6e64583