Why am I so pathetic? Why can't I just live and be okay with life's ups and downs? The love of my life deserves so much better than me. He's the reason I'm still here but it's not fair to him that I'm always mentally ill. It's not healthy for him and he deserves all that is good in this world. And that's not me at all. I'm useless. I hope he finds someone good enough for him one day. I'm the worst thing to ever happen to him. I know I am.

Idk.. idk if I have a question or need advice. I just feel broken. I guess.. how do I deal with the realization that my love deserves someone better than me? I know he loves me. But I wish he didn't for his sake. I can see it wearing him down. But he never complains and instead does everything to make me happy.