So at the end of class today I packed my stuff and hurried out like I always do but at some point I realize that my scarf is missing. So I go back to class, a bit panicked, to meet my math professor who was about to close. He look at me  curiously and I tell him that my scarf is missing. I couldn’t find it on my chair either so I start to think somebody stole it.

But then he say "you have it on you", so I’m looking at him, confused cause I obviously didn’t  have it. "It’s hanging", he tell me so I lift up my coat to see it actually hanging behind me, in between my legs like a tail... it was glued to my back under my coat, peaking outside the whole time.

I let out the most awkward laugh I ever had and break the akward silence by saying "it’s embarassing". He don’t answer nor laugh with me so I was really all by myself.

"Bye" I say. He answer bye.

I literally cried over this once I got back home. Right now I think about suicide. I hate it so much cause I know that this will haunt me for months or even years, creeping like intrusive thoughts randomly during the day like every embarassing moments I’ve had in my life.

Why am I like this??