I joined this subreddit cuz I didn't know what else to do, I don't have people I can talk to, i ghosted all my friends to the extent that I know it'll be shitty of me to reach out and I don't even think they'd want to listen, I'm scared of talking to my boyfriend, who's the only person I'd reach out to, cuz I feel like he hates me or something.

I can't bring myself to work. I have so much on my plate, my professors have started asking me to drop their classes if I'm not going to take them seriously, I can't catch up on anything, my apartment is a mess, I used to have a bath every day but I never feel clean right after one anymore so it's started to feel pointless, I stay up too late every night hoping to get something done, then I sleep in and miss all my classes, so I just stay in my room 24/7, I eat so much less now cuz I just can't bring myself to leave my room. I can literally FEEL myself spiraling and it's so scary.

The simple solution is to just do something, but I CAN'T, I can't motivate myself to get up and do anything, I literally cried and screamed at myself for 10 minutes just now to stand up but nothing,, i feel like my body and my brain are disconnected and it's a very alarming feeling, I genuinely don't know what to do...