I know that I shouldn't scream and break things. I know that I shouldn't burst into tears in public. I know I can't break down and collapse onto my knees when I feel so emotionally overwhelmed. I know I can't berate people when they deserve it. So all I can do is take that pressure and internalise it. I'm a quiet borderline most of the time; you want see me react, but it does happen when it gets too much.