the title basically. i feel like i hurt and worry so many people with my behavior and i feel so guilty about it all the time. im really worried that im gonna be like this for the rest of my life. i don't want to hurt others emotionally. therapy was helping a bit but i ran out of money and now i don't know what to do. 

i just don't want to be like this for the rest of my life. i want to be able to have functional, healthy relationships with people without me messing it all up.