I wish I wasn't bipolar.
I wish I was thinner.
I wish I was with someone who accepted my lows and told me things I want to hear I don't deserve.

I don't want to keep trying to manage it.
I don't want to eat healthy and workout.
I don't want to keep working on myself and lashing out and hurting people.
I don't want to keep trying.
I don't want to keep trying figuring out meds and seeing a psychiatrist and therapist who don't help, have never helped.
I don't want to try alternative medicines.
I don't want to ever get out of bed.

Right now sucks and it's too exhausting to fix it.