this is my first post here and i want to share my thoughts. i’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety since i was 12, but only 3 years ago i went to get help. taking medication did stop my daily thoughts about ending my life, but i expected them to make me happy, normal. it never happened. all these years i feel empty, no emotions. no matter how hard i try to enjoy life i still am neutral. right now i’m on vacation in italy. i should be able to appreciate this beautiful environment and how lucky i am to be here, but i can’t. this made me think - if i am not happy here will i ever be? not to mention the couples holding hands, kissing and smiling. i look at them and i realize i have never been and never be in love. i just can’t feel anything.