I was diagnosed with BPD at the age of 16 after being placed in an inpatient facility (my child psychiatrist at the time didn't know what to do with me, so I was sent to a ward in another county who started adult services at 16 onwards).

From thereon out, I've been entirely focused on recovering and it has been over a year since any hospital admissions, and overall I am living a stable life with a longterm partner with little to no outburts. I still get overwhelmingly stressed over little things, but my partner knows how to deescalate, and so do I, thanks to DBT. 

However, I still can't shake the emptiness and I'm sick of it. I want to feel completely normal, but I find it really hard to enjoy a lot of things and I feel stuck in a state of being bored/empty. The only thing that shakes it slightly is alcohol (I only drink about twice a week so I don't see this as an issue). I want to be able to feel happy without any of this. I don't know what I'm missing here, and I'm wondering if anyone else has been in this situation and knows how to get rid of this?