It'll be as short as possible because I don't even have any power to write it more detailed. It all started at least three years ago - right after I graduated from college. Colors started to drain slowly without visible reasons. Probably because there won't be that much friends now - I found a job as well as my friends. Someone left the city.

Then I met her - my first love. 8 months later we started to have sex (and date - in that order) and after 6 months she broke up with me. I was broken but hell - I need to focus on university. That was the toughest time in my entire life. Three months later she contacted me and we reconnected and three months after - a new breakup. Okay. I should focus on university - it's almost over. I have a few close friends. I always write them. What if I stop to do so? I stopped and... no one write me, even my BEST FRIEND, at least I thought he was. Well, now I'm alone, but I need to focus...

I'm broken. I have no one. I'm too close to do something crazy because I feel alone, unloved and everyone around me only makes me feel worse. But how can I feel bad - I'm a MAN - It's not right to feel bad. Five months later she contacted me again and a few weeks after, which is NOW - 02.2022 - the third breakup. Eveyone knows for sure that you must be stupid to do this and get dumped three times in a row. I know, but I relied on one thing - I knew she'll dump me again but I wanted to feel this love again. I wanted to feel that again no matter what. I felt so lonely. And moreover - I never felt that level of love in my entire live. It could be a lie, because I have great parents. But what I can say for sure is that NO ONE accepted me for who I am. NOBODY. Only she. I was truly happy with her. And now... I need to call one of my friends to share my feelings. But wait... I HAVE NO ONE. Oh and I must end university in a few weeks and I have no power. Great.

I'd like to make it more detailed, but I'm tired of everything. And also about title - why is "depression" and not depression? Because men cannot have depression. If you're a male and have this kind of issue - you're not a man, useless and so on. That's it, thank you!