So this just recently happened to me this morning.

About a two months ago, I went to my family doctors office to request a possible change to my medications, as I have been experiencing some severe side effects (i.e suicidal thoughts, panic attacks every morning). The doctor helped arrange a appointment with the psychiatrist to discuss the possibility of changing medications and in the mean time, booked me an appointment with the in-house mental health social worker.

A week later, I have my appointment with the social worker, everything goes okay and she booked me three more appointments with her as she was getting booked up pretty fast. We talked about possible appointment dates and discussed availability, and ended up booking three appointment dates (Nov 22nd and Dec 6th @ 10AM and Dec 13th @ 2PM). 

During the weeks following up to the appointment booked today, I have had a severe decline in my mental health. I have been experiencing anxiety attacks almost everyday, suicidal thoughts, we had to put down my dog, and my Nonno on my dad’s side passed away. So I was really looking forward for a place to express my feelings and hopefully get some guidance even if it marginally helps.

Fast forward to this morning, I go to the doctors office, I check in with my health card and the receptionist said she didn’t see my appointment in there. She kept on looking and continuing to explain she didn’t see it, making a little bit of scene in the office. She asks if I am sure the appointment is today, and I explained to her I booked it with the social worker and she wrote the dates on a piece of paper during my last appointment. She tells me to have a seat and goes to talk to the social worker, annoyed like I just walked in demanding an appointment. 

She walks to the social workers office down the hall, and talks to the social worker about the “mixup”. From where I was sitting in the office I could see this conversation happening, even though it seemed to them it was private. The conversation takes no more then 4 seconds, and they both start LAUGHING (most likely at me since there was really no time to discuss anything other then the situation) and the receptionist walks back to tell me the “news”, mind you still laughing. 

She tells me that the only appointment I have booked is the one on Dec 13th and proceeds to say maybe I forgot, and starts to write down the date of the actual appointment like I am some absent minded idiot (I did not have the piece of paper that the social worker wrote on me then but had it at my house). As there was a line for other people to check in and my anxiety was really acting up, I just took the card and left. 

I kinda broke down in the car (not crying but like just very obsessive ranting) to my father. When I came home, I went to where I had the actually piece of paper I was convinced by what happened that maybe I did forget, but sure enough it still said the exact dates we talked about in the first appointment, along with her full name and email address she wrote me.

The whole experience this morning at the doctors office made me feel like such an idiot, like I am so dumb I can’t even remember my own doctors appointments, and this situation just added on the compounding stuff that has happened to me the past couple of weeks. I was looking forward to talking through everything and maybe getting some semblance of relief, however it ended up only making everything worse.

I know it might seem like I am overreacting to this situation (and I probably most likely am), but I feel like the situation could have been handled better by them. Especially when it’s known they are dealing with patients who severely suffer from mental health and are looking for support.