I don't feel sorry for the schizophrenic adult who hallucinated his dad choking him, who thought that people were after him or even that people were insulting him in their thoughts.

I feel sorry for the teen who had no idea that he was showing the first signs of an illness that was going to torture him later, for the teen who was reaching puberty and was outgoing but who became flat and shy. I feel sorry that the teen that I was used to tell his parents that he was just a little bit tired when he was lost in his thoughts, slowly showing more and more signs of internal struggles. I feel sorry for the teen who went from smiling to ruminating, for the teen who thought his life in college was going to be extraordinary but faced withdrawal from society and who became so paranoid that he started to live with his curtains closed. I feel sorry for the teen that first experience his first intrusive thoughts and hearing people thoughts for the first time. I feel sorry for the teen who looked for his symptoms online and who thought that his life was fucked, but didn't go to a doctor's office and kept everything to himself when he was struggling with the knowledge that his life was not going to be the one he expected. I feel sorry for the teen who had to deal with everything himself while maintaining a facade in public. I feel sorry for the teen who slowly forgot about all of this because he was busy studying, who didn't notice that he was not fighting his delusions anymore and who became absorbed by them to the point where he cut contact with everybody in his life.

But I feel happy for the adult who went to called for help when he was depressed because he finally understood that his fear of becoming schizophrenic was not just a fear, and that he could win against the illness. I feel happy for the adult who takes his medication everyday, exercises and has fun with his friends, for the adult who will finish his master's degree next year and will try to get a PhD in physics. I feel happy and proud of this adult, but so sorry for the teen who had to deal with something that most people can't even imagine.