I'm so sick of tired of this shit tbh. I would prefer to roll around in a pit of broken glass and dog shit over this. 
I'm almost stalker obsessed with the same guy again. Not exactly the same guy, but the exact type. The ghosting, lovely, tall, troubled, misunderstood guy. 
I lay awake trying to come up with a scheme to get him to reply. I send nudes as a last resort. I drink and I cry. I want to show up outside his window like a fucking psycho. Kill myself so that he notices me, whatever purpose that would serve. At least scare him. 
He says it's not my fault that he disappears. He told me he loves me. I know it's bullshit, but I literally can't stop this and it's humiliating. 

I don't act on my thoughts, but I really want to set the world on fire if that meant he would call me. 
So weak.