Just to be clear, I'm not looking for a diagnosis, just looking for information to read up on before I even consider consulting my doctor who I can't really trust (because of past experiences).


For a while I've suspected that I have ADHD but when I research it, it doesn't quite fit right with how I feel. That led me to wonder if there are different forms or perhaps something that is similar, or perhaps I have multiple things that all counter each other. I like to research into things about me so I can better understand myself which is why I'm asking.

I'm female and in my early 20's. I struggle with becoming 'obsessed' with certain things like an activity or a game, and for a while I can't think of anything else. I'll do that activity all day, every day to the point where I forget to eat or drink, and I'll procrastinate on anything else. It's like an addiction. Sometimes it's even something as simple as researching or reading about something. The obsession will last anywhere from a few days to a couple of weeks, and then I just won't be able to touch it or think about it for a while, until the next time. I think it drives my boyfriend crazy because we'll play a game or watch something together, and then suddenly I just can't face it anymore. It's really frustrating because I have so many unfinished things that I feel like I never accomplish anything, even reading a book to the end.

The problem is I never experienced anything like this as a kid. I was a quiet kid who loved school, always got my work done (even though teachers always told me I was too slow because I put too much care into small things) and I was one of those "gifted and talented" kids who could do "special" school work that was above their age or whatever. I used to partake in reading challenges and I could read so many books in a short time and I loved it. Now I can barely finish three pages of a book before my mind is racing and I can't read the words before my eyes. I'd say it's been a slow change but I've only really noticed it the last couple of years.

Even though I have immense social anxiety, I can hold conversations with people without losing focus, even though I find it draining with most people. I like to plan things out and think carefully before I do things, and I'm very detail-focused in an obsessive way. All of these things don't really fit with what I've read up about the condition (lack of attention, impulsive actions, restlessness, inability to plan, etc.)

I guess I'm just wondering if this sounds like ADHD or perhaps someone knows of anything similar that I can read up on?

Thank you in advance for reading my garbled explanation &lt;3