I am very new to forming interpersonal relationships irl and over the past three weeks I've had problems with splitting at people, I have not had this problem in a while and it's exhausting and scaring me.  Originally I had a journal so when I knew it was going to get bad I would just pour vitriol into the journal then come back to the person when I've calmed down, but lately it's been so intense I feel like I cannot rest or eat or do anything until I tell the other person exactly what I'm thinking. 
Something happens that isn't good, instead of being able to calmly explain my thoughts I get so enraged I feel like I'm not even in my body or like I'm vibrating like, shaking with anger and I can barely breathe and I become obsessed with being as scathing as possible, hit send,  then immediately swap from rage to depression and cry and self harm.  
There has to be a better way to handle anger I'm so tired