I know BPD effects everyone differently. I guess I wish everyone had my flavor BPD. I dont suffer bouts of depression or anxiety, atleast not with the magnitude often posted here. My head is just this melting pot of constantly shifting emotions. I dont ..hate it. It can be exhuasting at times but I still like who I am. Its the way the world reacts to my emotional flights of fancy that causes me such distress. Im sitting in an airport trying to picture what the world would be like if everyone were walking around crying while thinking of the people they miss or giggling over some inside joke. I wouldnt have to work so hard to restrain myself. Standing in a corner stoically at parties pretending to be a wallflower when I really want to do is dance and chat up strangers. I wouldnt treat every relationship like a job with only goal to keep things stable. I could scream like a baby goat for no reason and my partner would just get it and maybe scream back at me without that constant mistrust of what the other was thinking. I think the world be a much cooler place if we were all crazy together.