I have struggled with anxiety and bad stress for the last 6 years or so. Every now and again I’d get depressed thoughts, never anything that I couldn’t handle. But the last few months or so, life’s been very stressful, and I’ve had these thoughts of, “wow, it’d just be so much easier if I was gone”. 

I believe it stems from my feelings of stress and feeling that I need to help everyone close to me and when I can’t, these thoughts start coming. I work 45-50 hours a week and am a full time coach of two sports. I hardly have time to shower, eat, and get ready for bed when I’m done with my day. 

I’ve been berated by family about how I don’t spend enough time with them,(recently moved in with my partner) and my partner gets upset that they say these things, and with me that I let it happen. I’ve always loved my family, friends, and partner but sometimes I just don’t have time to help everyone or see everyone. I feel like a piece of garbage because of it and that I’m not a good enough person. It’s just real hard, and my stress, anxiety, depression, and anger have been through the roof recently. All I can do recently is sleep or workout to hope the feelings subside, but it doesn’t help at all. 

Thanks for letting me vent, redditors.