First time poster in this community so bare with me please! 

Lately I’ve been feeling so alone and isolated. I’ve only recently been diagnosed with BPD but also on top of that I was diagnosed with cancer. I’m finally healthy now, im in remission which I’m so happy about but I don’t know how to move toward with everything. I’m aware my life will never go back to normal, I never was normal but I’m finding it extremely had to cope with the past year I’ve had. I’m definitely not gonna harm myself in anyway but it was kind of like a double hit with both diagnosis being within 6 months of each other. I never was able to grasp onto or wrap my head around this mental illness before I was battling for my life. My doctor wants to put me on antidepressants but I become a danger to myself on all the medications he’s tried. It’s gotten to the point where I’d have to go to a psychiatric facility to be trialed on any new medication because of how I become. I honestly don’t know how to do or how to move forward here. Does anyone have any helpful advice or information? I’m really struggling and no one in my life seems to hear my cries for help