I feel like I’m traumatized because of my father’s behavior, or at least it’s making my mental health issues worse. 

I’ve been trying to tell my mom for years, but at first I’ve been hearing that I should ignore that, then that it’s whatever and then - now, that it’s bad but not bad enough to make me traumatized etc.

She says I’m demonizing him and over exaggerating what happened.

Am I? 

Here are a couple of TL;DRs of what he did:

* Didn’t let me pick what I was going to study in university.

* Insulted me, called me names: stupid cow, cunt, dumb, egoistic, ungrateful, lazy etc. and said I would end up nowhere as a no one. 

* Beat me up a couple of times, not just a spank but actually hitting, one of those situations took place after I was already 18 and severely depressed and so scared I had to run off to the forest at night without anything on me, got police called on me and they threatened me to search my phone and made me go back with him.

* He doesn’t know/care about my diagnosis, for years prevented me from getting help I needed by saying that therapists are friends for money and that I can’t have problems and I’m just trying to have a tragic like.

* He’s mean to me and others. Called my aunt a fat cow on many occasions my grandma a liar etc. and even asked my mom if she wants to get beaten up two times recently.

* Went through my things, insulted me, threatened (you won’t go to university etc.) and threw away my two pairs of shoes (~300 euro), because I went for a couple of days to my boyfriend and didn’t turn back when he told me to. My mom won’t comment on it. I’m almost 20.

Things he said during that:

* If you don’t come back, you can’t go to the university and you can sue us, but it won’t help you(I’m from a European country where the universities are free and parents have the legal obligation to financially support their children until they’re studying) 

* You treat my house like a hotel and a brothel - you go out when your ass itches (want sex - which is bs because I just had one partner before and I’m definitely not that type of person to treat sex as just fun, but even if I did it’s none of my FATHER’S business)

* I will go through your belongings. Do you any diary’s? We will see what you really think then. (He even read my and my boyfriend’s names, I can assume that he found those in a love letter)

* I will throw away your “slut shoes” (he meant my demonia and dolls kill shoes that I got for myself with my own money for a part time job)

* Give me the address and money so I can send your belongings there.

I tried putting everything in the least amount of words. Do I have the right to feel bad? And the most important question: Would it be bad of me to move out to my bf and leave university for sake of therapy and supportive environment, because I’m too exhausted to do well…