I'm at rock bottom. I've realized I've spent years online everyday. Investing myself into small bubble communities and let my entire life slip away. There was a point where I suddenly snapped out of it and realized how I've been removed from the rest of society and floating with the bubble communities. Just these random conversations I would have with people or moments that would snap me out.

And then I realized those communities I was in are people like me. Others who are alone. Mostly made up of the same people everyday. I started noticing all of the posts were by the same 50-100 people. And all of a sudden I realized what I was doing. And the more I started to put myself in other places, the more I realized I had secluded myself with this group of 50-100 people who were also social recluse like me. I had spent 5 years of my life in internet communities. Everyday. Every hour checking online. And I had spent the 5 years of my life with 50-100 people who I don't know if I even like. I had just convinced myself this was the community I was in. I don't know if this makes any sense but I'm having a jarring moment of reality shifting. I feel like I'm in a mental daze. I just wish I was normal again. I hate where my life ended up.