I had been depressed a couple of times and after my last depression cycle in 2014, it was determined that a low dosage of lamictal would help me avoid any hypomania/depression.  Fast forward to 2021, I work with my doc to lower my lamictal (hate myself for even Inquiring and for him to say sure let’s see) and a few months later a lot of work and life stressors happen.  I go low key hypomanic for a few months, have everything literally going for me and when one major disappointment happens, I crawl into a deep depression.

My struggle is that all of my inner confidence is shattered.  I feel like an imposter for things that I have been really good at (I.e. what I do for work, my skills that I’ve been known for, etc).  I have no idea as to how I’m going to get that confident person who could speak to and do their job out of me.  I feel pretty defeated especially because I had just gotten to the peak of my career and I can’t even imagine being able to get back into things let alone getting back to where I was.

Hopefully someone can share their experience, some hope and ideas for me.