I just wanted to vent that I feel really disappointed. I grew up emotionally neglected which contributed to my bipolar diagnosis. I basically raised myself and with a single parent who was never there physically bc they worked 2 jobs. I was always told to go to my room and I never had real conversations with my parent bc they weren’t emotionally mature themselves.

I met my husband when I was really depressed off Craigslist when I was just at the lowest of low. Here I am 9 years later realizing my husband was emotionally abusive towards me. He’d yell, tell me I wasn’t allowed to get fat, I had a bed time, I wasn’t allowed to have more than 2 alcoholic beverages, made me lie to his family, threatened me… the list goes on.

I’m just sad I went from a shitty childhood to a shitty marriage. 

I’ve read that people with bipolar tend to find themselves in abusive relationships as the victim. Am I the only one?

I’m upset my husband used my illness against me. He started controlling every aspect of my life. It became unbearable. Now we are separated. I feel a big sense of relief but not looking forward to this whole divorce. I heard it gets worse before it gets better.

I get scared of the way he’ll react which is a red flag of abuse. They always keep you guessing. You never know if they’ll be in a good mood or a complete asshole.

Ugh I just want to be happy. I’m tired of people not treating me right. It’s not fair. I just want to be loved and be respected.