For many years when i feel emotionally vulnerable and hurt I'm imagining ripping my chest open with my bare hands exposing my heart and insides as well as digging my nails under my eyes and ripping my skin off my face. Is there a meaning to this and does anyone experience something similar? 

Today it seems my girlfriend of 4 years is breaking up with me and i love her to death and we were planning our life together until recently. I feel devastated and would love it not to wake up tomorrow. Haven't had these feelings for quite some time but now they are coming back. I need some help, someone tell me how to handle this please.