My boyfriend is out of the country, so for Valentine’s Day I tracked down his hostel and sent him his favorite kind of pizza. He almost seemed annoyed. “Jokingly” called me a stalker and then kind of stopped texting me for the afternoon. He did not send me a gift of any kind. I knew he wouldn’t, but a postcard or something would have been nice. In person, he is pretty engaging and generous. I am confused and hurt.

I feel like I’m always in a position where I am giving and trying to tame my emotions— and the other person is callous and rude. Forget Valentines, I think this is just a rude reaction to a gift. I am terrified to confront my boyfriend about it. I do not feel wanted or desired at all, and I am stressed. I sort of feel numb. I don’t understand why the efforts I put in seem to be received this way by so many men. I try to date better people and I am not sure why my relationship is suddenly losing steam. I feel like I might as well have sent this pizza to a random address or thrown my money in the wind.

EDIT: Since people are asking, I asked him for the name name of the hostel he was in (and obviously I knew the city already), so that is how I found the address where he was.