I have struggled in recent years with low energy, no motivation, and just general malaise about life. But the one thing I had to look forward to was always coming home to my cat. I’ve had him for 11 years now and have grown up with him. He always laid with me when I was sick or just feeling bad. He was diagnosed with kidney failure a month ago, and now I’m sitting with him as he takes his last breaths. 

I genuinely don’t want to think about life without him. It feels unreal. The past few years have been really shitty and I’ve lost several family members, but nothing has affected me this much. My cat is the only living thing that I can say I actually love. I have no idea how to cope. I already struggle with deriving any enjoyment out of life, but now I just feel completely numb. I’m really just making this post so that I can organize my thoughts somewhere, but I’d love to hear from anyone else that has gone through a similar thing.