So I have about 15 barn cats. In 2 years, I've had to put 2 of them down, spent 2000 dollars on another to save her life, and my vet has been testing them for feline leukemia virus and 2 so far have been positive. About half have a cold right now and I don't know if it's just a regular bug or if it's because they're contracting the leukemia virus which weakens their immune system.

Parking the car today, I ran over one of the newer kittens, maybe 6 months old. I wasnt doing anything different, just reversing slowly into my parking space like Ive been doing every day for 2 years. Then it happened. It's head was smashed.

I don't know what to do. I'm going broke trying to take care of these cats and I just go and run one over?? I know I would never intentionally harm them but it was still my doing.

Can anyone just help me feel better?