hi i’m new to this whole thing about speaking about what’s on my mind especially for bpd. i have an fp and he was my boyfriend but we broke up in january. we’ve been on and off since but right now in this moment we are supposedly just friends. he doesn’t seem to understand i can’t be his friend because i’m still in love with him and i think he’s still in love with me too but i don’t know if he wants me romantically. i’m so anxious and i’m meant to be going to a concert with him on sunday and i joked and said i’m going to seduce him and use rubbish pick up lines and this was what he replied with “But I'm not answering the question, if you wanna try and seduce me with rubbish chat up lines that's fine haha I'm not gonna stop you but I'm not gonna guarantee its gonna get you anywhere” and it hurt because i feel unlovable and undesirable. he told me he’ll always find me attractive but i don’t think that’s the case. he also said i’m still his favourite person (he doesn’t have bpd). i just wanna find someone who wants me as much as i want them- i want him but i know he’s bad for me. if you guys have any suggestions on what to do i’d be very grateful:)