Made a post on r/schizophrenia during another bout of depression, listed my grievances and now several hours later, I am feeling calm after smoking some weed. I read it and my suffering just seems so puny to me now that I'm growing older and am about to hit 25 next year so my prefrontal cortex will become fully developed and I will no longer be a boy but a man. And now when I look back at all this stuff I did as a kid, teen and young adult as pathetic shit only a puny kid would do or say. I even looked like a puny kid. But as I am now older, I can see myself developing. Let me make this clear that 18 is not "adult" it is oversized child, that's it. Brain developmemt matters far more than sexual development. And I feel kinda neutral to all this. I don't really care about all this old stuff, I want to act like a man and be a man. Not some fucking kid. Weird how the weed + age progression kinda changed the course of my post history in a single day.