Earlier today I had taken some painkillers, quickly my breathing became shallow and tight. I took my inhaler as I'm asthmatic. It dried my throat out making things feel worse. I told my mum. she just completely invalidated me. Telling me it was just anxiety and to sit down. I told her I would sit down but outside where the air felt clearer and asked if she would sit outside with me as my breathing was scaring me and making my anxiety worse and I needed help.

She just kept telling me to sit down inside. and refusing to go outside with me.

an hour later it was still bad and I was becoming dizzy too. she kept telling me to just go distract myself. nothing was working.

I asked her if she could drive me 5 minutes away to see a medical professional to just check my oxygen levels as I was worried it could be related to my asthma. I would have gone alone but I don't drive, it was dark, it was a 30 minute walk and it's been snowing and I felt like I could pass out.

She told me to not phone any services as it wasn't needed. She completely invalidated how I was feeling. I have not done this behaviour. I used to have panic attacks many years ago, but I never asked to go to hospital because of them. I'm aware of when I'm having a panic attack. I may have been panicking but that's because my breathing was and still is not right. We have free healthcare so that's not the issue.

I always feel just like I don't matter to her. She went to bed without even checking to see how I'm feeling. She regularly drives my brother to and from places, cooks all his meals everything. I've always felt he was the favourite. Even if I try to talk to her she just looks on her phone I realise she's not listening and just walk off.

I'm still super worried about my breathing as I take sedative medication at night, so I'll be taking them to sleep and I'm worried it'll make my breathing worse again. I just wish she cared enough about me to support me getting help when I felt like my throat was closing up.