Even though it's been five years of a really happy relationship, having BPD and having a boyfriend makes me feels like a cruel person and that's partially because of the stigma alone. 

I know learning I have BPD has explained some of intense/impulsive stuff I've done while by his side. Yet this whole time, he's been patient, honest and stuck to his guns. We've worked through issues when they arise, and he's been honest with me constantly. He's the smartest, most responsible and respectful man I've met, and he is not by any means a victim. 

I've gotten therapy, work on my physical health daily to keep the body working better, have a discord server for BPD to help feel less alone, work on my self care, educate myself of my illness and I'm working on my *shit.* 

We've lived together for over 4 years, I've never ghosted him, I work so hard to listen to his concerns, I always thank him when he sticks to his boundaries and I listen to him when he has an issue with something I've done and I work to not do it again. 

I love him, but apparently because I have BPD I'm not capable of giving him a healthy relationship. I see and hear people give him a hard time and tell him to "give up on me" because dating someone with BPD apparently equals instant abuse and I'll never change? This hurts so much... The stigma is horrid. 

I'm not abusive. I'm not evil, or incapable of love or growth. Thanks for coming to my TEDtalk. Rant done. 