In 2 weeks I’m finally getting a mental health evaluation. 

I have seen a psychologist before (around 5 years ago) for anxiety/depression/agoraphobia but even then I never fully stated how bad it was and how it was affecting me. 

My anxiety has gotten slightly better but my depression deteriorated. I have Asperger’s, ADD and the past 2 years or so have developed OCD(self diagnosed). 

I fear that if I mention the OCD thing, which started to affect me bad, I might not be taken seriously and it’ll be waved aside.

As for the depression, I have a habit of saying ‘but it’s fine, it’s not important, I manage’ even when I am dying inside.

I have been waiting almost 2 years for this appointment and I want to get the right help. 
I have been physically sick the past 5 years (chronic pain and autoimmune diseases) and it has contributed to my mental healths current state. 

But when looking at things from a realistic point of view, there isn’t any reason for me to feel so bad, so I am not sure how to explain this emptiness. 
Everyday is too hard for me to deal with and I don’t want to be here but I don’t really have a reason to feel this way and this just makes me feel worse. I feel like because of this I might not let them know what is going on.

I am so tired of things and I no longer want to try because nothing I have tried so far has helped me. Even things looking ‘better’ in the future don’t sound good to me because I no longer care, I just don’t want to be here anymore.
But I remember who I was before and I still feel in my heart who I am, and I have crazy amount of love for life and I just want to be able to feel that again, if that is possible. 

Is there any way I could make it easier to express what is going on with me? I just want to be taken seriously and be understood.