i feel like a fucking loser. all of my friends are either out of state or i barely talk to them. i live in a town that i fucking hate. my coworker “friends” don’t feel like real friends and i feel as though they’re probably just talking shit about me behind my back because it’s very difficult for me to hide the fact that i’m struggling mentally. i’m sick of feeling so alone. i have a boyfriend but i can’t wait only rely on him for my happiness. i don’t know what the fuck i’m supposed to do. it’s just so disappointing to feel so left out all of the time. and i don’t even know if i WANT to make friends with people here because most of them fucking suck but it sure would be nice to be able to talk to someone who wasn’t miles away so i didn’t think about blowing my fucking brains out every five seconds.