TW : sulcide mention

It's like I'm stuck and I'm playing my usual "chill/funny" role like in every social interaction I have with everyone around me. The only person I TRULY open up to is my bf (FP). But then in front of my psychiatrist I'm like "yeah, everything is fine, I kinda want to kms at every second, so you know, nothing new under the sun". I can't help but minimize, laugh my problems off because I don't want to melt down in front of them. I tell myself I have to hide my feelings because the moment I start talking about them I'm sobbing so hard it's just ridiculous