i want to share my struggles to people, to people that I'm close with. i want to stop like i want to feel and address my symptoms but I cant... i feel like I don't have the right... 

bc it would mean that I have given up, that I let my disorder eat me... i feel like I should just suck it up and carry on.

i mean yes, life and the world indeed just carry on.

but I'm so tired and I don't have safe space to be vulnerable.