Tw: suicidal thoughts 

My boyfriend broke up with me over a month ago and I’ve been cycling since. I sleep a lot and feel so exhausted. I hardly eat and have lost ten pounds. Some times I find myself extremely happy but it doesn’t last long. 

Today I nearly bought a car. I signed all the paper work but backed out towards the end. I was so anxious I was crying and it felt like the salsa were breathing (like I was tripping). I keeping seeing meaning in license plates, specifically KYS license plates which to me means Kill yourself. 

I’ve been dealing with pretty bad suicidal thoughts, oh and I started self harming again. Like I just wish I didn’t feel so many damn emotions. 

I saw the doctor recently and he put me on 40mg of Latuda and I’m on lithium and buspirone.

Advice anyone?