Hello!
I was diagnosed about 3 years ago and it has been an ongoing battle for the majority of that time... I recently got discharged from the hospital, after spending a month there, while involuntarily committed. I did my best "fake it till you make it," routine, and now that I'm home I feel so horrible. My hallucinations are terrifying and I am too anxious to even leave the house. I'm also having suicidal thoughts, and spending a great deal of time "fantasizing" about it, though dying isn't something I'm particularly planning for at the moment. I've been home just 2 days so far. And my husband said I just need more time, but he doesn't understand what it's like to have monsters follow you around and harass you day in and day out. I haven't slept since I got home, and I see my therapist today... is it a bad idea for me to tell her what's been going on? I don't want to get IVC'd again, but I do want my medication titrated up to the therapeutic level, like the psychiatrist at the hospital told me they would do... what is my best option? I'm scared and very embarrassed looking for help.