ationships, i've always wanted to find My One person, like most probably and it's all i care about, all i want- i tend to look at people in terms of how well they can fit into my idea of My One when i first meet them and often i find someone who has 'potential' in my head to be that One and in a short amount of time i put them on a sort of pedestal, i have the ability to fully idolise people and i have before, they are like above everything i can't even express, but this pedestal is like a 'semi pedestal' like a try out and very often i get disappointed in some way either by the interest just fading or by being triggered, by something they do accidentally or on purpose, forcing me to devalue them and then move on, i feel like i can't form deep relationships unless they're really intense, otherwise they just feel shallow, empty and superficial.. i have old friends, one that's still quite in my life and is important to me, they're like my exception but as i meet new people i see this is my subconscious thought process.. i'm maybe looking too deep into this but i think this is basically it.