I feel like I'm wrong for saying this but I immediately thought about the stigma.

I'm male, about to turn 20 in less than a month and I'm freaking out at the thought that all this time my personality flaws fit perfectly with the symptoms. 

How much of my life has been controlled by this? How effective is treatment?

I tried to kill myself a couple weeks ago, as a result I was denied help from a specific mental health team because I'm "too high risk". My pyschiatrist insinuated that if I lied to them and said I wasn't high risk they would be more likely to take me.

I feel like I have way more questions than answers. No one has properly explained the ramifications to me and I feel completely in the dark. Do I tell my friends and family at any stage? Do I have to tell any future romantic partners?

This is a BOMBSHELL to me and I don't know what to do.