I have struggled with anxiety and depression for 15+ years, I have been in therapy a few times, and on medication once. Things are getting quite bad again, so I made the decision to reach out to start therapy. My appointment is today at 1pm, I have been anxious about the appointment since making it last week, worried that I wouldn't know what to say, or I would down play my symptoms, or just say inaccurate things because I felt stressed/pressured in the moment. Therefore, I decided to make a bullet point list outlining my main worries and symptoms that I could go over with my therapist.   


The problem is that the list has gotten much longer then I anticipated. I shared it with my partner last night to see if he thought it was relevant information that I should share with my new therapist and he said yes. But now I am worried. I feel like it is a weird thing to do, and I will be judged negatively for even making a list. I feel like I should be able to just tell her, and not have to read off the list, even though I know I have problems expressing myself in  the moment. I feel like the list is too long, irrelevant, that I made it all up (even though my partner confirmed that those are all things I have expressed to him in the past multiple times) etc.  


Do you think I should let my therapist know that I made a list ahead of time and read it off or give it to her? Or should I scrap it and just be in the moment?