My wife and I have a 11 year old daughter who's been diagnosed with GAD, SAD, and mild depression. 

Over the past few years her anxiety has prevented her from doing so many things, and is now dominating her approach to everything. She has no interest anymore in trying anything new. Covid makes everything worse.

The therapy sessions and psych evaluations she's had to this point have been so stressful for her that she hates the idea of continuing this in any form. During a recent evaluation the therapist recommended medication as an aid to helping her engage with treatment, but my daughter flatly refuses to consider it, and so I feel like it's not something that should be forced into her due to the possible negative consequences. 

She openly tells us that she hates herself and wants to be a different person, but she's unwilling to attempt anything constructive that can help bring about positive change (like therapy, talking with us about it, reading books or watching videos about it, working on things by herself, etc). She just wants to ignore it all, but more and more this forces her to suffer through experiences that wear her down, and I know as she gets older those experiences will only get harder and more painful, and spiral more and more.

The other thing is that she's extremely defiant and angry with us whenever we try to engage on this or explore new ways to try to help. It's been exhausting and stressful from a parenting standpoint to know she needs help but being unable to help.  

I'm also very concerned about the possibility of negative coping behaviors as she gets older, like substance abuse, eating disorders, acting out towards others, letting relationships or responsibilities fall, cutting, and of course suicide. (She says that there were a few times when she felt things would be easier if she was dead, but says she's never considered hurting herself or ending her life).  

I myself have also dealt with SAD personally all of my life, so I understand what she's experiencing, but I also never had the kinds of opportunities for support that exist today when I was her age.  Instead I allowed anxiety to dictate my life for too long, but over time I was able to overcome it to it no longer controls me. I'm trying to help my daughter understand that things can be different for her, that she's not alone in this, and she doesn't need suffer on her own, but so far she's rejected everything we've tried to do to help her see that. 

I'm wondering if anyone has felt the same or has supported someone like this, and if there was anything that helped in those situations?