My depression and anxiety have been at peak for last couple of weeks. Struggled to even get out of my bed, lost appetite and fucked up bowl movements to the point that i have lost weight and bleed through stool everytime I attempt to poop.

I have an important deadline (dissertation submission) coming up and I haven't started working on the project yet. My supervisor hasn't been very helpful when I reached out to change the project. I have told me enough times that I feel stuck and the only response I got was reach out if you feel stuck. At times I didn't even know what to reach out for. Been in isolation for a month now. Things started getting better last Friday when finally anti-depressants started working after 3 weeks. I am still anxious and don't know where to start from or who to talk to. 

I just don't know what to do. Everyday I have been waiting for death but don't have the guts to do it because I don't want to lose my life over a system's failure. I know I just need to get through this but the time passing by and I need to get this shit done. Started the degree and the project with high ambition but at this moment I just want to get through. Haven't even started looking for jobs because I have been mentally paralysed to do anything. I need someone to guide me through the process. I don't care if people think it's spoon feeding but I need specific guidance to through this. I know there's a lot I can experience and do but this is an unavoidable commitment I am struggling to meet. 

This constant oscillation between I don't want to exist and one day at time because there is more to the life is killing me. Just start somewhere is a good but vague advice I don't know what do with it. I don't want to just talk about my problem and no get any solution. I have reached a point beyond venting and I need the solutions to my problem so talking to friends and family isn't helping. 

Please help.