I have been going through many counselors for years, and Now I know many ways to combat anxiety and hysterias. But, there is one problem.

I haven't been able to follow any of the advices whenever the actual situation hits.

When all that I need to do is just taking a deep breath, my lung just feels like it's gonna explode. When I am aware that I need to respond rationally in an uncomfortable situation, I suddenly get hysterical and panicking. When I am getting rejected - or even refused kindly - While I know that it's not an insult at all, I get irrationally angry with no reason at all.

I feel like I am trapped in a train that has gone out of control and the only thing I can do is to wish nothing bad happens.