We have been together for 2 years. I just started having BPD symptoms this past October when our relationship starting failing and I have become obsessed with him. He can’t stand me anymore because I’ve been having fits of rage and screaming at him a few times a month since October. (actually got diagnosed with bpd last month) I’m always the one hitting him up and texting him first and asking to hang out. I literally begged him to be with me. We aren’t even in a relationship anymore we are just friends but it’s only getting worse. So I have to finally let go.  

Last night was the final straw. I apparently had an attitude and he told me to leave his house. Usually I would beg him to let me stay but I finally gave up.  I texted him last night after I left saying sorry for everything. I haven’t heard anything from him. I think it’s finally really over and I feel like my heart is failing me. I feel sick to my stomach. I’m at work so it’s even worse I have to put on a front. Inside I’m dying 

I have nobody. He made me cut off all friends. Idk what to do. I’m at a loss of what to say or do and it’s absolutely killing me but also sort of a relief? How do I cope???