Hello to the person that is going to read this shit text lmao. And sorry if i am gonna give you a stroke because my english is kinda crap. 

&amp;#x200B;

So i have been thinking a lot about life and stuff around it and tbh i have no idea why to even live, i mean since i have basically already failed everything i have not really any reason to keep going. But the only thing that is holding me from ending it is probably the fact that i am my fathers only child and i can't really think how he would feel if his blood line would end because his shit son died. But that's the thing, i can't really save my dads bloodline because i have no idea how to speak to persons, everytime i try i just stand there stuttering like i am having a heart attack lol. So the thing i mostly do on the days is just playing video games (which is pretty normal in 2022 so nothing special). But i have honestly no clue what to do when i grow up since my grades are shit and i can study for 12 hours every single day for an week ( no distraction) and still get an E on the test. I have no idea why because sometimes it feels like i have some kinda of short term memory loss because i can study something and then just forget it the next minute. I dont know if it is because i am not focused. And since i can't remember anything i am always doing nothing instead of using that time to make something productive. 

Even if i spend so much time at my computer i only spend it on games instead of something useful like programming or design because i am a dumbass. I also can stress over absolute nothing. Like i can stress about a test that is going to be in 6 weeks. And as an fat double neck cheese burger man i can not really play any sports. 

So yeah that is it. And yeah i posted this here because i could not really find any other r/ where i could write something like this lmao. So yeah this is probably gonna sound like every single gen-z "deppressed" person lmaooo. I just wanted to have somewhere to write this.

Bye for now!