A whole lot of you were right. It was a lot of fun while it lasted, but it blew up in my face. 

I can't believe I didn't see it before. 

I enjoy the company of other people with BPD. It's like having a secret understanding. So I figured dating someone with BPD would be awesome......

Word of advice, if you will tread these waters.. if you're currently trying to recover and you're working hard to improve, for the love of god, don't be around someone who is actively rejecting help and recovery. It. Does. Not. End. Well.

I've never ever met anyone so narcissistic. He would call himself God about once a week! He constantly degraded me while also talking about how he and I were better than everyone else and anyone else. He sees BPD as being BETTER than everyone. He curses people who were not okay with our problematic behavior. He justifies being a really shitty human being and was encouraging my own toxic behavior. Not that people with BPD are shitty (fuck anyone who says so), but this guy is all the worst things about our disorder without any of the self awareness.  Everyone I meet here and who I've met IRL have at least acknowledged that some of our behaviors are unacceptable. 