I’ve made pretty good progress in my BPD recovery. I’m not actively suicidal, I don’t self-harm or engage in impulsive, reckless behavior, and I almost never lash out at others. Unfortunately I still don’t have the underlying emotions under control—I feel “down” all the time and am prone to crying fits. I’ve become a very anxious person. The worst part is the dissociation/derealization. I’ve experienced this on and off before, but now it’s nearly every waking moment. I feel as if I am living in a perpetual dream state or bad acid trip. There is a foggy pane of glass between me and the rest of the world, and everything feels like a video game or movie. It’s difficult to interact with people because I am barely lucid. I can’t concentrate or form solid memories, and it even seems to affect my vision. It’s difficult to focus on my BPD recovery when nothing seems real. Is this even a BPD symptom at this point, or is it something else entirely? Have I developed full-blown DPDR? How can I return to reality?