I’m 15 and was hanging out with two of my work friends. We were watching a movie and having a good time, but the two of them were making weird jokes about sucking each other off and stuff and also spanking each other .

I decided to tell them I was gay because I was uncomfortable being there. One of them said he didn’t think he was doing gay jokes and that he was just normalizing it. 

I struggle from anxiety and I have a habit of apologizing when doing nothing wrong.

They both said they don’t think of me differently and I feel badly for saying anything.  

I wish I wasn’t gay. I wish I didn’t say anything. 

I’m so scared things are gonna be different now. The last few days have been the best I don’t wanna ruin it.