I get panic attacks when I’m alone—like  blind hysterical panic and it doesn’t end til I find people. I’ve tried meds and therapy for years but I still can’t do stuff like driving in rural areas w no quick access to ppl via shopping centers or whatever. 

Im afraid I’ll never be able to live alone and that if I do find myself alone and panicking it’ll reach the point of zero thinking ability, just running from panic thru the woods. 

I’m exhausted and feel stupid and ridiculous but it’s so far beyond anxiety attacks, jsut full on flight response w no thinking