i’ve noticed in my relationship, every single time we start moving towards the “exclusive”/ serious side, i fuck it up. i will look for ANYTHING to get myself upset and try to prove to myself that he doesn’t actually like me. then obviously my self-sabotaging pushes him away bc i overthink and say things i dont mean and then we’re kinda back at square one where i feel like he doesn’t know if he wants a relationship with me yet . (luckily, he’s been SO understanding and forgiving when it comes to me and i’m so thankful for that. )

recently, things have been going really good between us since i haven’t had one of those episodes in about a month and so i think he might be seeing hope in us again. i’m just really scared i’m gonna fuck it up again, i’m trying so hard to just not be on my phone so i dont overthink and have the opportunity to look for problems. 

i just wanted to know if anyone else does this too and how do you deal with it?