As you already read from the title, I'm not planning to stay around here for very long. The main reason is because there is nothing in this world that makes me happy anymore. I'm not well both mentally and physically. Because of these reasons I'm not doing well in school and that means I won't have a very bright future. I'm a loner and nobody would care if I died anyway. I was never very happy in my life, but back then I was able of pushing the sadness away by doing the things I like, but it doesn't work anymore. You can only fill the hole in your soul up to the point, and I passed that point some time ago. I loved playing videogames and going outside to the forest, but now I don't enjoy them despite having plenty of time.

I attempted suicide about 1 and a half year ago in summer, because I just didn't see a point in going forward. I don't know what stopped me, but I regret that I didn't took that opportunity. I had a plan to try again early this year, but my plans were stopped by an awesome person that I immediately fell in love with. It was first time in years that I felt genuinely happy, but as you might have guessed, it didn't quite work out. I don't blame them, they followed their heart. 

I really didn't want to do it before Christmas, but I can't take it anymore. As some people say "live your life fully, or not at all", I never lived my life happy or fully, and I never will, so there's only option left for me. Thank you for reading, I hope you'll all have a wonderful and happy life. See you on the other side