I’m recently diagnosed with BPD, which has been a very sad yet eye opening thing to learn. I’m well aware of who my FP is, and it’s completely platonic. We are good friends but don’t get to see each other often as they live a 6 hours drive away.

I find myself stalking through their Instagram and tiktok all the time, even when they haven’t posted anything new. I think part of the reason is out of envy for their appearance and body type, and how I wish I could look like them. But I can’t think of anything else.

How do you deal with this sort of obsession? Blocking them is something I really don’t want to do, both to keep the friendship and to keep my obsession.

I feel so twisted for even having an obsession with them.