We were in a serious relationship twice, dated for 2 years total. Then we broke up because it wasn't working and stayed besties. That was until recently, when she knew I was actively suicidal (I've attempted before) and she left me on read. 

I felt abandoned, so after about a week of being left on read, I soft blocked her on everything. She sent me a message saying she doesn't know why I soft blocked her, but just that she wants me to stop using the infographics she made on my mental health account. That's it. 

So this friendship we've had for 8 years is done. She always knew what to say and was almost always there for me up until that suicidal episode. Part of me thinks I shouldn't have thrown it all away. But I was hurting SO BAD, and she knew that I was about to kill myself and still didn't respond to my messages (also, I just survived due to dumb luck- long story. Changed my meds and I'm back to my normal self.) 

We had been drifting apart for a few months, so at least I'm not losing a friend who I'd been speaking to constantly, but still. I also think that when I type it out, I sound super toxic, expecting her to be there to save my life. But from my perspective, I almost died alone and abandoned. (also, it hurt that she was still interacting with her other friends on Twitter while ignoring me.) Sighhhhhhh.