Yea, I’m not doing too great, I just been crying these last couple of days. Honestly, I don’t know what I’m doing with my life and if it makes me happy or not, just living the constant routine of military things and I’m just as afraid to get out. I don’t have motivation to go throughout the day, I guess I just try to tuck myself away and try to make everyone else smile as a goal. I can’t sleep without waking up every 20 mins and thinking why I’m not good enough. I wanted to just hang myself in my closet for so long and last night I finally got the courage to do it, so I sent the text to friends/family, to then not being strong enough to actually get off of my closet drawer and hold my legs up. I’m living everyday like if my last should’ve been yesterday and my biggest fear is once I’m able to do it everyone is gonna think that I was sad but in all honesty, I did something that would take all my pain away.