Now take this with a grain of salt but I just realized maybe I need to get on meds. Not because my recent psychotic break but because since that break I realized the reality I've live in for the longest time is a lie. There's not supposed to be shadow people or like these sentient beings following you. Your not supposed to feel paranoid about the people around you thinking that they are copying you or following you. Your not supposed to think you're every person that's why we all make the same mistakes or are easy to read because that's what I would do or how I would think so they must be me. All the delusions I've had since I was a kid are not real? And it's not that I am in psychosis i mean I am but it hurts to know the reality I've always known is not the right one. And I'm just confused because thinking the things I think aren't right. It's so confusing. I've always told myself that what I experience isn't normal but yesterday I got to get the full fledged showcase and explanation for it. That cannabuttemade me realize all the way up till now the things I do the way I am. My withdrawal my weird antics is because I'm not well. I was born not well. And that hurts. I'm still very confused and when I think I want to cry because I am so confused because your brain makes your reality and when your always been showed the wrong one  what are you supposed to do. I've had so many different delusions so many accounts so many different instances Jesus I can't even name them all. I'm hurt because your telling me what I've known for so long could maybe be wrong? How would you feel if I told you the reality you live is fake or isn't real. You would be conflicted? Confused? Lied too. I'm hurt not because of my psychosis. But because I'm not seeing what everyone has been seeing this whole time.