I am a student, working at a call center for the summer. I’m a month in out of 4 and I fucking hate my life. It wasn’t bad until the company had a GIANT setback and customers are pissed. The work has doubled. 
I was okay working 8.5 hours a day but now I have to stay over everyday along with everybody else to get the work done. I already felt like I didn’t have enough day left  getting off at 4:45 but now I get off work around 6, sometimes later. I’m working 10-11 hour shifts now. It’s only been about a week and I can’t fucking do it. The week kicked off with me making one of my last calls of the day and it being somebody absolutely screaming at me. I broke down and actually sobbed at work. I tried so hard not to but I could not hold it in. Luckily everyone was really nice to me about it. But fuck I felt terrible. And it’s just been downhill since then. 
I’ve been getting off later and later and the setbacks and the angry customers and the workload have just gotten worse. And everyone else seems to be just fine. But I want to fucking die when I stay later. I want to die when a customer yells at me or there’s an issue in the system. I want to die with every setback. Everyday has been masking my symptoms of BPD and ADHD as best as I can. 
Today I got ready for work but missed my bus (I accidentally got on the 7:45 instead of the 7:35 because both were at the stop at the same time?). I got off the bus when I realized, had a major meltdown, then texted my supervisor saying I was sick. I felt the sense of dread shrink a tiny bit knowing I wasn’t going.
I just want to be normal. I want to have normal reactions to things. I don’t want to have a meltdown over every little thing. I try so hard but I can’t have normal reactions. I cant quit because Id have to find another job anyway. I hate being this way and Im so tired.