I tried so hard to stop cutting. It’s been months since the last time. I started again. It’s been on my mind like crazy for about a month and I did but I feel shame after. What’s crazy to me is I cut cold turkey becoming an alcoholic, getting high daily but cutting idk that’s the hardest I just can’t stop the same way. I got a tattoo over my scars on my arms and I said now I have this tattoo I won’t cut. Why does that particular spot feel so good. At first it cutting was a way to “punish” myself or feel pain but now I feel alive when I do and I love it. It’s addicting and I know it hurts my husbands heart if I say I did and the shame becomes more intense. Life has never been easy never and this is my escape. I want to stop but I don’t and I don’t want to feel shame for making myself feel something for once.