I feel like I can only hold myself together for a few weeks at a time before my life starts to slip out of my grip. It’s been almost a year and I’ve been in this same cycle, over and over. I got into the university of my dreams and then a few weeks in, I stopped going to class because I couldn’t find it in me to get out of bed for weeks on end. I eat and sleep enough to survive. I got kicked out of college for having bad attendance and failing every single one of my classes. I’ve moved back home, a huge hit to my pride, and am watching all of my friends from high school move through life and college like it’s nothing. I can’t find work. I started community college a few weeks ago, hoping for a fresh start. I don’t even have any interests anymore, I don’t know what I’m going to do for the rest of my life. I’m watching my grades start to slip again and no matter what I do I’m never good enough for my parents. I want to get back into therapy but I feel like it wasn’t doing anything. I would go, let everything out, talk, but when I leave nothing has changed. Life still sucks and I don’t know how to fix it.
Depression is so isolating.