I'm a 25 year old who is now 5 months into working at her first big after uni job. It took me almost 2 years of soul crushing rejection emails and interviews, but I got a job I really like and I feel I am p decent at.  


Now, my job involves shipping goods in the country and throughout the rest of Europe and I'm quite capable when it comes to doing that. However, about 2 months into the job, I got an assignment for a new customer in a country we hadn't yet shipped to (Ireland).   


I don't want to point fingers, but I basically got tasked to arrange all of the shipping process without support as a new worker, from scratch. Plus, the whole Brexit situation indirectly affected the way freight is shipped to Ireland. I got it done though, after checking with 5+ freight companies and a damn ransomware attack that flatlined our system for weeks. About 4 more customers were added in the following weeks and I arranged similar shipping for them.  


Anyway, my fuck up: I didn't charge these customers any freight costs. At all. For the past 3 months.   


We don't charge freight for our customers in the country, we charge freight for our own branches in other EU countries. Despite being a customer, bc they are in another country we are supposed to charge them freight. I failed to see that distinction as a new worker and when I realised my fuck-up 2 weeks ago, I basically like, had a mental breakdown and have been quietly freaking out since. I feel so useless and dumb.  


Total freight I failed to charge is about €5k. Yeah. The thing is, we shipped out more goods this Friday and obviously I didn't wanna continue to cost my company money. I fessed up, I now sent my colleague an email basically clarifying whether or not I have to charge them and admitting I haven't done so in the past 3 months. I also ended it with 'if you wish, I can retroactively send out these freight invoices' bc idk, I wanna offer some sort of solution. I sent this email at 4am on a Saturday and I have been stressed out of my mind ever since.  


I am lowkey terrified to show up on Monday. My manager is the coolest guy and he's expressed a wish for me to really grow in this company, potentially staying here for years. I feel like such an evil failure. I'm worried I won't be able to catch any sleep.