Now I know this might sound stupid but I sometimes think that people with BPD (myself included) are always chasing the high. And I am not talking about drugs or alcohol or anything like that. I just Think we are all addicted to good emotions. When you think about the fact that we feel more intensely than others (or so we are told) you realise that our happiness is not just "normal" happiness. It's kind of like we are super happy. Or super in love at the beginning of a relationship. Or super excited when we start a new hobby/project. But it becomes less extreme with time. It almost starts to dissipate. And we change things. Sometimes change people or our passions just to get that initial high again. It's like we are addicted to "being happy" but we don't know how to just enjoy everyday or how to be content. We crave that hormone hit our brains send us when something new happens. Something our body deems worthy of attention or effort and rewards us for going after it. But it all fades and we are left feeling empty like an addict coming down from a high. And we leave chasing a new "dose".

P.s. I don't know if this is just my brain rambling so I apologise if it's offensive or makes no sense