Hello,

I recently started dating a friend who has BPD.  She was driving everything forward (she made the first move, she invited me in, she talked about going on trips together, she compared us to a married couple she knows).  I didn't take any of it too seriously and I was having a great time with her.

She also asked me multiple times things like "when are you going to stop being nice to me?" She has had several exes in the past who were abusive.  

I mention these things because the other day she basically completed ghosted me.  I finally asked her what was going on and she said it was "too much too soon."  I'm left scratching my head because I really didn't think I was doing anything to make things move along too quickly.  We were seeing each other 2 or 3 times a week, so nothing wild.

Why I am posting here is does this sudden switch between two extremes possibly relate to her BPD?  I've talked it over with some friends and some of them believe she is sabotaging things because she fears getting too close to someone.  Is that also something that can come with BPD?

I apologize if I am way off here and she just ditched me, but it seems like this is something that came out of nowhere and I would really like to find a way to patch things up if possible.  If these are actions that are related to BPD, knowing that would help a lot.

Thank you