Don't get me wrong, I'm miserable and pray for death when distracted too, but it keeps the tears at bay because I manage to partially focus on the TV or the objective of the game, at least (most of the time anyways..) 

But as soon as its the working week, or the weekend, and I have 5 minutes to myself where I'm not buried in TV or games, the thoughts take over in a split second and completely destroy me

I cry every day at work, sometimes I just wipe my tears and hop on a Zoom call  1 minute later

God I hate myself and existing SO MUCH