I just want the right people to care, why is it so criminal to want someone who loved me, made promises of a good life, wanted to spend their life with me, to just care a little bit about how I'm doing. How is that really so manipulative of me?

I'm so alone and I see the snow outside and it reminds me of last year when everything was shitty but we had eachother and the holidays were like a beacon, a sign of a good life ahead, a sign that everything will be okay. And now I'm alone. And I tore it all down myself.

I'm so sick of being so unstable and so stuck on this person. I've never felt so alone.