I've been suffering from severe MDD for 3+ years, it comes in waves and I'm in pretty bad shape right now, but this is a pretty constant idea. I cannot get anything done, I can't do my college homework, I can't pay my bills, I can't respond to texts, because I can't picture myself living until tomorrow. This is an every day occurrence, it's just that things aren't "bad enough" for me to actually kill myself or check myself in. I can't find a reason to convince myself to pay my bills or do my homework when I believe I will inevitably kill myself soon. Does this even make sense? Should I check myself in, or when? I don't understand. Am I supposed to call WHILE I'm driving my car off a cliff? (lol) PS. I am not in crisis right now.