I'm always depressed this days(this years) but sometimes things get to difficult to withstand, it happens in the middle of a conversation, when I see/hear something that triggers me and that's it, I feel so bad I cannot even breath, I want to escape, go away, be alone but at the same time I want to be hugged so tight I could forget everything. Sometimes I really want to restart my own  life or simply put an end to it. Nobody would really care anyway