I have so many people around me. But they do care, they talk to me everyday, they want to hangout, but I still feel alone. Like the third wheel to a three person friend group (literally). I feel like I am going through something unexplainable. I just feel sad. I don’t feel much at all, and I feel like I need to feel something. I just talk and talk all day, and I have so many friends. I also have so many oppositions. I feel like I need companionship but I don’t even like anybody, barely evenly sexually anymore. I feel like I need to get this out there. I also am doing things I don’t enjoy for the sake of other people (I think?) but those people don’t even care about me. All I want to do is just escape, buy a plane ticket to some European country or maybe Alaska, and just disappear. Dissolve into the landscape and maybe finally feel something, or se a bigger picture. Yet, there is no way that’s possible Atleast for another few years, and legal and monetary problems (with getting out of the country, I am not in prison). Shit sucks rn