hi friends! i was wondering if anyone else has experienced this or holds any insight. i’ve been going through a lot recently. my dad has been diagnosed with cancer for a while now and it’s not looking good at all. i’ve actually been down here with my two parents to assist in taking care of him. it’s really dark, stressful, painful stuff and almost too much to process. in saying all that, i believe it’s making all of my BPD symptoms worse. things i’ve made major progress in i feel like are regressing. most days i just wake up triggered and almost looking for a fight with my significant other. my paranoia has gotten worse, my mood swings are worse, my “random” blow ups are getting bad again, and overall i’m just struggling a lot. 

it’s always a bit hard for me to make sense of my feelings, or be able to fully sit with them. but i was thinking, my bpd symptoms are most likely being exaggerated because i’m going through such a hard time right? and also, a lot of my trauma stems from my childhood ya know. from my two parents i’m currently physically and emotionally giving my all to, to take care of. it’s all taking a big toll on me and i think that makes sense. if anyone has insight, or has experience a time where things out side of your bpd are REALLY difficult which in turn makes the bpd symptoms way worse. 

i’ve made so much progress over the years and i really don’t want to regress, or add more problems for myself, when i’m already suffering so much. 

thank you to anyone who reads this! you are appreciated.