cw: rape mention, throwing up, hospital visit, drunkness

 what i remember from the beginning is drinking from a small bucket (tradition for last day or birthdays) then coworkers following me to the bathroom because they knew i was gonna throw up. at one point i walked around outside of the bathroom telling everyone 'yeah i'm fine!!!' because they kept asking me, but then i went back into the bathroom to throw up more. this is where i barely remember what happened, but from vague recounts, text history, and call history, i decided to call 911 and tell them where i was. i dont know if i walked to the ambulance or was carried. my coworkers told me later that i had just started screaming and crying. i think i was just screaming inside a locked bathroom stall and dont know how i exited/how it got unlocked. 

more fuzzy memories were that i was talking to EMTs, screaming A LOT, telling them how to call my boyfriend and my mom, and wanting to go pee. i remember at one point i was screaming at them from the bathroom because i really needed to pee and they wouldn't leave me alone to pee (idk full context). i remember my mom arriving and i was talking to her but still screaming for my boyfriend to come. they bootyjuiced me/injected me with calming stuff so i would sleep, and after that i dont know what happened. my bf told me that he arrived and i had calmed down more, apparently i teared up when i saw him. he said i was joking around with him but the nurse was telling me it wasnt a laughing matter lol

from there my bf helped me change my clothes, pee, and he let me sleep until i was discharged.

what i just dont understand is why i started screaming and freaking out. even when very drunk im either fun or just sad, or sleepy. now my reason for asking in this sub: my bf speculated that it was some sort PTSD-like defense mechanism. people have attempted to roofie me, get me drunk, one particular story is this guy who was supposed to be my friend told a crying-drunk me that i was going home in a taxi when actually he brought me to his place to try to r-word me. i was also freaking out at that moment bc he tried making out with me but he still put me in his taxi telling me he was taking me home.

was my reaction at work just from the trauma of that situation?