I can now acknowledge that having a FP turns out to be unhealthy for me. Everything coming from them that could possibly be taken as a form of rejection sends me into a extremely emotionally tense state and a negative spiral yada yada yada.

It just happens that my FP is still my closest friend and we're also still physically intimate (we theoretically used to be together but I'm not big on labels hah). I can very much see how my emotional outbreaks hurt us both and the relationship we have, which is already quite strained from a long time of me being my BPD ass self and not going to therapy (I do now). I feel like my FP has moved on from that heavy emotional strain of being in a romantic-ish "relationship" and just considers me more or less equal to their other close friends. For the sake of my mental wellbeing, I very much aspire to be able to do the same.

How do I maintain that relationship with them without seeing them as my FP, the most important person in my life and being so extremely emotionally dependent on them? How does the process of only distancing myself from them emotionally, but not socially or platonically, work? How do I manage to not see them as so utterly important without completely cutting them off?