Fuck fear of abandonment. Had a date with a guy that went really well and I was excited to have a second date. He said he “was excited at the prospect of us”. That was over two weeks ago. Since then it’s been like pulling teeth to even try have him actually commit to a second date or even have a phone call (busy with work which I get. I mean I think at this point it was bs but I was telling myself it was my BPD talking and he was assuring me he was still interested). 

Thought I had gotten him to commit to tonight, but then he tells me he’s not coming because he’s bummed about his barber taking off too much of his beard. Wtf. Then he tried turning it around on me saying I wasn’t being understanding of his feelings. And I get being upset...but come on! 

Logically I know to move on, stop wasting any energy, and that I probably dodged a bullet in the end. But here I am crying, ranting on reddit because I’m hurt over a mostly random guy who clearly doesn’t think much of me. 

Fuck. This. BPD. Shit.