Everyone in my family has ADHD. It’s super hereditary here. All my siblings, my mom, her siblings, her mom, etc... I got diagnosed very young, exhibiting the classic symptoms my siblings did. And it wasn’t so bad. I went to special needs preschool because they also thought I maybe had autism (I did not). By the time I was an adolescent, the ADHD was super manageable and I was well adjusted.

That was until my bipolar disorder manifested. Then came the panic attacks. They went hand in hand. Anxiety came next, wavering in intensity. For awhile before my bipolar diagnosis I thought I had depression, but, turns out it was bipolar depression. Just last year i started dissociating heavy and I most likely have depersonalization derealization disorder. Dissociative episodes had always been there, just few and far between. Now I’m getting referred to an inpatient clinic because my fear of dissociating is fucking up my life. And, guess what my dissociative anxieties resemble? OCD, just another one to add to the pile. Fuck. I miss when it was just ADHD. None of my other siblings have any of these other problems. Now, obviously I’m glad they don’t have to suffer, but sometimes I just think...
Why me, damn it? Couldn’t it have been one of the other siblings? God just had to spite me out of our whole clan?