I'm feeling sad, tired. I feel detached from reality, confused. I have no clue what to do with my life anymore. One time I want to try to live and the other I'm confident I want to end my life to end the suffering. All the emotions I feel genuinely fried my brain. I feel like some kins of half alive subhuman or a zombie. Days, weeks, MONTHS just go by and I'm just... here. Doing nothing, being confused just as I was. Therapy didn't give me any answers just cleared my wallet. I take meds just for the sake of it I don't think they help me anymore. I'm really done with it. I'd rather be sure if I'm gonna live and feel something or know I'm gonna shoot myself in the face on the closest occasion.