well I may be in a mixed episode and all I feel is extreme excitement, suicidal depression and RAGE. like, I didn't wash myself for more than a week due to depression and since I have wavy hair I need a diffuser. it doesn't work. nvm. but I touch my right waves and then my left waves and they're asymmetrical. RAGE. I trew a fit (Idk if it was sensorial, I have audhd) like a huge fit, I cried, screamed, jumped on the bed and cried until my bf held me. (and this is just an example). yesterday my dad, fed up with my bs, decides to hospitalise me and I throw a much bigger fit (uh, before this happened I tried to kns jumping off the window (that's why I put the tag) ) I kept punching my mother (don't worry, she's my abuser) and I bit my father without letting go for a big while, like my teeth were glued to his skin by my rage. btw, at the time my father decided to bring me to the hospital I threw that fit because I didn't wanna go. but then my bf asked me "what would make you feel better?" and I replied "punching corpses". so I, completely delusional, euphoric and idk what else but it felt beautiful because I had lots of energy, went to the hospital with them to punch corpses but when I got to the doctor I freaked out and then stopped talking (autistic thing, I sometimes freeze). then the doctor said you have to speak or there'll be consequences for you so completely enraged I slammed his desk and wrote on my phone what was happening. Fast forward to my hospital bedroom. I sometimes get fits of rage and break my stuff, while still being depressed af. for example, now I can't get up to pee because I feel too tired and depressed, but I'm afraid rage will kick in. is this normal?