Last night I got into somewhat of a fight with my boyfriend/fp of 5 months, and it's the first time it escalated like this. Long story short, after work he said he was having a bad day and that I could come over if I want, but he wouldn't be in the best of moods. I wanted to be supportive, so I went over even though I just started Wellbutrin and my anxiety is through the roof. He seemed to be slowly cheering up, and things were good until I had a panic attack from a combination of the new meds, going through a change at work, having not slept in 2 days, and being hungry. 

He noticed me crying, asked what was wrong, and I told him exactly that and expressed that I felt bad for putting attention on me when he was feeling bad. He got super quiet and starting deep breathing, I apologized again and he apologized for not knowing what to say. I told him it was fine and that all I really wanted was a hug, which he gave me. Then he went downstairs and had an emotional outburst of his own. I could hear him throwing things and punching walls, and I felt so bad. I feel like I messed up. When he came back upstairs, he got super crossfaded and pretended like nothing happened. Things still feel super tense, though.

I'm so scared that he's going to break up with me over this. I hope he doesn't throw things away over one rough night, but with bpd it's hard to see any other end to this.