Disclaimer: I wasn't paying any attention to it today as it hasn't been acting up lately however, I'm literally breaking down crying right now because of it.

My mother asked me to light a fire with the use of matches. Now there's something about them that makes me really anxious and I don't know what. I have played with matches before when I was younger and I find it fun. However as I grew, I find that just holding one stick makes me uncomfortable and the thought of lighting it, makes me so anxious I break down. It honestly scares me.  

Anyways, my mother asked me to light a fire and I can't bring myself to do it, I just stared at it until she yelled at me to do something. That's when I realized I was anxious about it. She keeps on pushing me to do it but I just couldn't. I stared at the match bringing myself to light it but instead, tears filled my eyes and I couldn't breathe. Still, she scolded me saying I am a coward and I don't know how to do anything. It made me really insecure. I realized she never understood anxiety, that instead of her comforting me, she's breaking my self-esteem apart. The one that should comfort me makes it so hard for me that I just couldn't stand that place any longer.

Idk, I'm prolly making a big deal out of it but I'm just really upset. Forget about the matches and the fire, it made me really sad that my mother couldn't understand my anxiety.