Another short lived relationship and I’m starting to wonder if I’m able to love at all. I feel like my life is a series of infatuations that die out of boredom or an intense sudden repulsion like wtf. I look at my friends and family with all their long term relationships, many over a few years, and I just think how? I used to think people just stayed together out of fear of being alone because surely you get bored but I realise now that was just a deflection. I really fucking liked this girl man and it’s just like wow now I could give less of a fuck to the point where she suggested just being friends and my first thought was cba. And I know I still like her somewhere deep down I just can’t access those feelings again and this shit sucks. Makes me wonder how it’ll ever change…