Hi everyone, this isn't really an advice thing but i have serious relationship issues in an intellectual level that i can't be with anyone no more in spite of that i have no real problems besides from the ideas in my head.

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This sure will sound weird and also cynical. I am guy who's in 22. I often think that ages of 20's or 30's should be the best years of someone's love life. But as for me it's like a living hell. Let me explain why.

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I am someone who really wants to experience love, trust basically the good things of life. But my lack of trust in people, trust in the good and honesty keeps me blocking everytime. Why someone be honest, when they can lie, decieve and take adventage of the things ? I can't really believe the good in others, everyone live their lifes only for their own goods. Why sacrifice for someone in a relationship when you can easily replace them with someone else, especially someone better ? Manipulating them for your own good always sounds better so why should i pick the harder way by sacrifacing myself and staying loyal to them.

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I used to put faith in others, i was honest, forgiving, naive and easily fooled. I always cared about the ones i loved. But now i can see clear as a day that this is no more than a "being stupid" nowadays. Whenever i've trusted and loved someone with their faults and mistakes without expecting them to be perfect, they told me that they deserve better than me and simply left me for someone better. No one cared about my feelings, and my opinions because it was way much easier. They hurt me because they could, simple really ?

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I think the society and humanity needs strong idealistic values and traits like "honesty, empathy, forgiveness, seeing the good in others" etc. But we focused only of our own personal goods, desires and wishes. While we disregard other's good we actually -in the long term- hurt ourselves. Because we contributed to create a more selfish society. This will consume us more in the future.

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Don't get me wrong, I don't think i'm ugly, or miserable at all. I'm a decent looking guy and most of the time people ask me "why you don't have a girlfriend ? You're handsome bro." etc. But there is always a better one than me isn't it ? I can easily believe a girl when she says "I love you". I still believe in love until they found someone better. I honestly can't believe "I will be there for you, and i won't ever leave you no matter what". I am certainly sure that any guy or gal would dump his/her SO when they don't need them anymore. The thing that i am not so certain is; Were we this kind of selfish, unfaithful and insatible from the beggining of history, or the new society of focusing on the individual level and disregarding of good idea and values made us this much miserable ?

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Don't get me wrong, I am not in a depression or grief, i feel ok but this kind of thinking is tiring. I am not sad but tired, really tired. I also can manipulate people but i don't want to. Being bad person is really advantageous but it kills the love of life. Being an cynical atheist almost killed my soul.

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The real reason that i wrote this, I wasn't trying to convince you that the human relationships are toxic and broke. I was actually, miserably, hoped that anyone else in here, could change my opinion and my cynism so basically save me from this misery... Plus, thanks a lot if you've read this far.