I'm at work, and my anxiety skyrocketed as soon as I got in. I work in a bowling alley, and at the weekends, it gets busy. My brain decided today was a good day for increased anxiety. I was trying *very* hard not to panic in front of the customers - I think the only way I got away with it was to spend as much time away from directly interacting with people as I could, leaving my colleague to serve. I do feel bad for that, but I've apologised and explained to her. 

I hate this. I'm on my break now, was able to let it out (but because I'm aware I'm still in a building with people, I was still on my guard. I'm terrible at showing anxiety or sadness around people. It's like my brain puts a stopper on it, which is more annoying than it sounds because I end up not fully being able to empty the panic). 

My supervisor has said I can stay up here for as long as I need to, which I do super appreciate. But I'm dreading going back downstairs. I know I'll cry if he even asks if I'm okay, and because he's caring, I know he will ask it.