Has anyone here ever been in love? Is it possible to love someone selflessly? How do you know if you’re in love? For me, it’s always suffocating obsession or nothing. I’m really loving and caring but often can’t judge my emotions. Sometimes I feel like I’m just manipulating them to fill the void in my heart. But I always end up giving more. I never receive anything back which makes it worse. Has anyone ever loved me? Have I ever loved someone for real? I don’t know. I’m so obsessed with the idea of love that someone could show me some basic human decency and I’ll develop a crush and start fantasising about us together. When I like someone I start romanticising them so much in my head that the line between reality and fantasy starts to blur. Most of the time I’m just attracted to the person I created in my head and the actual person is never like that. But I start believing that it’s real. It takes me months and years to realise that it’s all fake. It was all in my head. Would I keep chasing the idea of love until the end of time and never find it? I’m often worried that I’ll end up alone. I act like that’s fine but I’m very scared. Everyday I wonder if I’ll be alone forever and it scares me. Is this how it’s gonna be forever? Falling for the wrong people knowingly and trying to fill this void in my heart? It never works but I never stop. I know it’s unhealthy but can’t stop. Does anyone else feel this way?