I am their embodiment and without them I'm just a shell of who I used to be. 

I don't have any hobbies, any likes, I've just been pretending to be someone to distract myself.

But when I no longer need to distract myself where will I go to? Who will be there? Will there even be a time where I don't need to be distracted? 

I don't know

I'm slipping away and the worst thing is, I know I used to be somebody. Somebody kind, a person with beautiful thoughts and things to say, but I can never get that back. 

How could I?

Because even with help you get thrown into another jail knowing you already have one around your mind.

It's safer to pretend. It's safer with them, but god is it tiring to live like this