i struggle so much with impulsive buying and i’m *obsessed* with spending money on clothing. my friends and family joke so much about the insane amount of things that i buy while also hinting towards the fact that i have a problem. i have had at least 30 online orders placed since christmastime and i always tell myself to stop but i can’t help myself
i have a never ending list of things i want to buy and that i’m “saving up” for but i never end up waiting and oftentimes use payment services like klarna or afterpay to justify it. the list just keeps growing and growing and it gets to the point that the list stresses me the fuck out and i’ll buy one or two things to feel better, but i end up freaking out about how much money i spend. and for every item i cross off the list i find three more to add on. i’m lucky enough to have a stable job and a good amount of savings but it physically hurts me to think about how much more money i would have if i didn’t spend like this. to a certain extent, there ARE a few items that i have never regretted splurging on and that i do enjoy having in my collection, as fashion truly is a hobby of mine. but i just get so stressed out by the amount of trendy clothes out there that i can’t keep up with. 
reflecting on it, i feel like i spend so much energy and money on trendy clothing because i want people to see me as a fashionable and trendy person and i have this vision in my mind that i’ll take pictures in these outfits i buy or go out on the town with them. but the fact of the matter is that i’m so self conscious that i haven’t had a picture of me taken in over a year, and don’t dare post any pictures of me because it freaks me out. 
in search of tips to help stop :(