I (F24) have been struggling with BPD, and was recently (finally) diagnosed. My partner is great and we’ve had our ups and downs, together for over 5 years, live together, moved to another state, etc. 
I feel like my disorder is stunting my relationship and that frustrates me beyond belief. How do I stop being jealous of others getting engaged, married, and having kids? I feel like my brain is either “want baby” or “leave”. I feel like I need constant reassurance and reminders and I know my partner is exhausted of me.. I am. What do I do? What do I say? I feel like I overshare. I’m just busy pouting. I hate that I get weird and angry and then have to apologize for acting like a child. Honestly I wouldn’t want to be with me either. I can’t keep looking at social media with all these announcements. I feel like shit.
Disclaimer: I am on a long waitlist for therapy :/