Long story short, I wanted to throw a party with my friends. One of my friends said she can’t come. I basically I figured out she was hanging out with some on my other friends without me. She said it was because the host didn’t want to let more people in but it still hurt to know i wasn’t a top choice. I was a sad and she could tell. When I asked. I could bake for the party she aggresively said no. They thought i was trying to guilt trip them but in reality I was just to show them a sign of friendship since I couldn’t go. Turns out, I’ve been making one of the people in the group uncomfy. When I asked him he got really upset but I just wanted to know what I did so I could stop doing it. There’s a lot more nuance to the situation, but I still feel really guilty and dissapointed in myself. I’m also PMSing and I think that just made it all worse. I’m tired of making the same mistakes again. It’s like I haven’t changed since freshman year. Any words of encouragement or advice is welcome.