This text is about my parents who have been arguing almost every day since I was born. I am currently 17 years old. They are not divorced and live together, which leads to quarrels that turn into serious bullshit and conflict. My father always says that we are to blame for everything, my sister my mother and I. He says how hard it is for him and how we don't do anything and we don't want to listen to him. How we don't do anything in the house and how we weren't made for anything. Our mother is in debt and the financial situation is another problem in addition to all this. Sister just found a job and she is giving a part of her salary to pay for bills. She didn't even joined college bcs we don't have enough money for it. My father always makes a sacrifice of himself and says that it is the hardest of all for him, but no one asks how my sister and I feel. I wake up every morning with cramps in my stomach and I fear that there will be a conflict between the two of them again. He is not currently employed and does not want to work because he says that we are not worth it. I feel very bad because of all this, because I can't help in any way, neither financially or about improving their relationship, which no longer exists. But in addition to all that, what hurts me the most is that our father blames us for the situation in which we are currently mostly my mother, and lately even my sister and me. Sometimes he goes to a tavern from which he returns drunk, after which he becomes aggressive where a conflict arises again. He threatened to kick us out of the house if we continued to annoy him. after a while the nervousness passes him and everything is okay again and then conflicts and arguments again. It's as if he's calm one week and nervous the next. This has been going on for years. I feel very bad because of this and all this causes anxiety that I have been feeling for a long time and depression that makes me wonder the purpose of my existence. Every day it gets worse and worse so I even had the worst thing in my mind. I apologize for such a long text, but at least I found a place where I can ask for advice and help. So thank you in advance and it is much easier for me after writing this text and I hope that your help will at least help me feel better in addition to all this. Thanks again in advance for everything and spend the day as best you can.