I'm needing some support.

I have been dating someone for a year (officially one year on Sunday). He has been dishonest with me about things and I caught him going on websites that he should not have been going on while in a relationship back in June (I found out about it in June, it happened in December and April). We live together which makes things a bit more complicated. I have tried very hard to get over the past issues but I really don't think it's going to happen. I get too stuck on things and this entire thing has led me to be a self conscious mess. I am constantly feeling like I'm not enough and I am at a point that I would rather just be alone than feel alone. Despite these two issues, we haven't had any problems really. We get along fine, don't argue much, he's quite thoughtful, etc. However, the past issues are always lingering.

I talked to him this morning and said that I couldn't do it anymore. That is was taking too much out of me. I hate myself because I feel ugly, undesirable, and not good enough. And all of that started in June when I found out about things.

He is currently away on a business trip and will be back on Saturday. I am feeling like I'm spiraling. I keep doubting that I made the right choice and I feel so lost.