I’ve been so so terrible to them lately. FP is also SO. They love me so much they r trying to forgive me. But I’m causing fights right after we try to make up after hours of screaming. im destroying them slowly. Causing so so much pain. I’m the perfect example of why bpd has a bad rep. I’m actually an evil piece of shit I say terrible things and feel nothing of it. Like the worst things u can say to someone. I promise I’m not this person all the time just when I split and get into these “moods”. I use “ cause it’s more like episodes of delusions and anger. Only when they say ok I’m leaving I cry and beg. I feel powerless to my mental illnesses. Bpd, an anxiety disorder, bipolar, adhd.