I just realized I’ll never be good enough for myself. 
No matter how good my art gets, I will always hate it. 

No matter how pretty I get. I will always be ugly. 

No matter how smart I am. I always be stupid. 

No matter how many relationships I have I’ll always be unloveable. 

No matter how well I function I’ll always be a burden. 

Complements and validation only fill the void for a few seconds. And I don’t think that’ll ever change. 
My formative years were filled with being loathed by my family, my friends, my perers, and parents of my friends (i dont know why they hated me??? I was a KID) 
no matter how much love is shoved down my throat. It’ll never be enough. 

I dont know why I’m writing  this to be honest. I know I should learn to love myself but it might genuinely be impossible