Hi all.

So I’ll start by saying I don’t have an official diagnosis, but have suspicion that I have BPD or at least have a lot of BPD like behavior patterns. 

I feel like my experience is that just about every other day, I’m super present and loving and compassionate and patient etc., and every other day any tiny thing (usually me misinterpreting something my spouse says or feeling trapped) sets me off into indignant self-hatred-projecting rage, and I very sincerely am stumped as to how to get out of that second state back to the first (which I optimistically believe is the *real* me). I feel like on days when I get triggered into that angry second state, I try so many things and strategies etc. And I always end up sucked back in, almost no matter how much I feel like I’ve gotten out of it. 

Does anyone have advice about this? How to manage that? I’m working with my therapist on it, and am hoping to get in to see a new psychiatrist soon too, but if y’all have strategies or advice that would be awesome. 

Thanks!