I’m not looking not to be judged, feel free to call me a terrible person and down vote me for feeling this way, although I am just being honest and open about how I feel and would appreciate further prospective. 

I didn’t have quote on quote daddy issues or really any form of a daddy kink until I started having major issues with my dad. I’ve always been subby with guys I’ve dated and I’ve always had issues with my dad but when I moved out at twenty after a fight with him its been pretty rocky since. Its also worth noting I have no relationship with my mom, I cut her off six years ago and got sick of her alcoholic bs. 

I have had a lot of anger towards my dad for what he did in the end especially for not financially supporting, and protecting me like I thought he would have when I needed help. And when I say protecting me I don’t just mean by just helping me financially I also mean giving me a safe space at his house while I was there which he did not. 

When I moved out I got really close to a guy friend. I was always somewhat interested although because I didn’t have much experience with dating I didn’t really know what I wanted. I even told him I probably shouldn’t be dating right then just because I was processing so much with what happened with my dad and a lot of other things having to move out unexpectedly, support myself and continue college. He said it was nonsense and I ended up submitting to his objects and I started my first relationship. 

When him and I had sex for the first time I was really drunk. I called him ‘daddy,’ and I never really remembered having any sort of daddy kink before. I asked him after if he liked it because it was new for him too and he said as long as I wasn’t thinking about my dad it was cool. So I just continued to call him daddy only in bed although at the time I never really heard of ddlg until we broke up and realized there is a whole community that had a similar need in a relationship.

**This is the major issue** I had with my first ex, and the rest of the guys after that and even towards the guy I am dating now is **I want to be financially supported otherwise I feel like a complete sell out especially having sex with them or if a lot of time has gone by in the relationship.**

I know they are not your dad but I do communicate and expect from them like they are deep down as much as I know rationally I need to communicate and respect their boundaries. If I don’t like it I need to either resect their boundaries or leave and find someone that would be open to my dynamic although I really do love the guy I am with now outside of any kind of dynamic we have for who he is. I know this is not right however I wonder if it stems from the anger I have towards my actual dad? I wonder if this is something common especially among other women with daddy issues or those drawn to the ddlg dynamic.