I have lived for 25 years without anyone in my life. I've learned to cope and get myself on a track to self sustainability. I've thought about putting a gun to my mouth. I've thought about the long route with body damaging harm. At the end of the day there's nothing more settling than taking that rage and that sadness and turning it into self reliance. Whether it's financial improvement or social. Tiny steps one by one is what gets you through. Hell I was just done with a hell on earth relationship and right after my house burned down. I kept going. I'm not going to give you the generic response of you have family and friends relying on you but it's true. Every small step you take. Every person you meet you have had an impact on them. Whether small or substantial. Today I stopped with a lady with a dented in bumper. I did my best to fix her bad moment. The bad things that happen in life to others are the time to shine for those who live in the darkness to make their lives better. We can accomplish things. We can be better. When we impact others we ourselves can improve. It's about the little things. Help an old lady to carry her groceries. Anything to give someone a better day then they've had. That memory will give us the drive to carry on. The forgotten of the world have the job of carrying on the living. We can do this. Dont give up. You've lived through hell, you've had the worst of all days. your brain tells you that enough is enough but life still goes on. Do good things, and it will give you the life you've been yearning.