I couldn't share this with my friends because some of them are out on a beach somewhere and they're happy, while some are out on a pre-Valentines date so I thought I would rather talk about it here.

So basically I'm sick with a sore throat. Took a PCR test today just to make sure and I'm back at home in my room. My family's downstairs and I asked if we have any medicine because my head is aching bad and mom said we have and called me downstairs. I didn't go down - my body was AT ITS WORST at that time and I felt weak and tired as if I don't have the force to even stand up. She barely cared. 

Probably the medicine is down there and I'm not asking for much when I just wanted her to bring the medicine upstairs in my room but I couldn't tell her that because she's downstairs and I can even hardly speak because of the sore throat. And even if I could tell her, she'd tell me to get it downstairs anyway.

A few hours later (2 hours to be exact), my head was aching again to the point that I cried way too hard while lying down and just wishing for it to all go away but in the middle of my cries, I heard my voice saying "Do you want to end it?" and that's when I thought of choking myself.

This is my first time attempting this but I did choke myself while staring at the sky through my window, continuously crying. Turns out, I can't kill myself with choking. It's too hard.

It would be funny to say I tried to kill myself over some medicine I wasn't able to take but everything's been piling up lately and that medicine incident could've been my last straw.

&amp;#x200B;

TL;DR: My fam doesn't care an inch about me so I thought of killing myself. Seeing that I'm still able to post this, it means I'm alive -- not well.