Mornings seem the worst for me. I wake up hours before my alarm unable to sleep. Then I go to work, a job that I don’t hate but don’t really enjoy either. I know people will say look for a new job but I just don’t know if that will even help. I was off work for almost a year and a half due to the pandemic and been at this job for about 6 months now. This job definitely pays well and more than I’m used to so that’s definitely playing a factor in my decision to stay. I know I won’t make this much anywhere else but maybe I will be happier? But then again maybe it won’t, everything just seems so pointless to me right now. 

My husband is absolutely amazing and I look forward to coming home to him every day. And my family is nothing but supportive and kind trying to help me through this. 

I know it’s not my fault for feeling this way and it’s just a chemical imbalance in my brain. I’ve been seeing a therapist who has been trying to help me with self compassion which she thinks is playing a factor in all this. But I just feel like I know everything she has been telling me and I just can’t believe it for some reason. 

Anyways any advice is appreciated but maybe I just needed to rant.