So might not be the place to share this but this is the strangest case of reoccurring dreams I've ever had, other than my reoccurring dream from childhood of going whale watching then needing to flee a tsunami. For a little context, I went basically no contact with my mom after my grandpa (her father) died in 2017.

It isn't the same dream but it's always some version of me fighting with my mother and then my grandpa is there in some context. The last dream was my grandpa was braindead but kept somehow duplicating himself so there were a bunch of differently dressed versions of him propped up in a room and my mom was yelling at me for spending time with him instead of her. Other versions of the dream I'm frantically trying to pack my things to leave home but can't so I'm trapped with my mom, I screamed at my mom trying to convince her to kill herself, and basically lots of dream screaming matches that make me wake up feeling unwell. 

So like I've had nightmares before about being trapped at home but they were always more spread out. The only thing that changed recently is that my mom gave my dad a letter to give to me a few weeks ago and the only bit of it I've read was a random line that I happened to glimpse that said something like "I've made peace with the fact that I'll probably never be able to speak to you again" which made me mad because if that was true I wouldn't have this letter haunting me?? 

And like the anger and frustration of dream fighting with my mom is mixing with the sadness of my grandpa being dead. Like I know it's going on 5 years since he died but I'm still upset and couldn't visit him very often towards the end when he was in a home because of work/my mom. 

So that's it, that's what I wanted to vent about. I don't know if reading the letter will make my brain finally think about something else or if I should just burn it. My mom is a huge narcissist with Munchausen syndrome and basically wants to be a mother to me only now that I'm almost 30 and don't need a mother.