Ok this might sound over-simplified but it's what keeps me going. 

I cannot control other people's actions... I can only control how I respond to those actions. 

Maybe it sounds dumb but I started reminding myself of this like a mantra about 2 years ago. And even if it's just the moment it takes me to tell myself that helps me refocus but it works!   Especially if any of you are chronic ruminators like me. I already regret most conversations I have and social situations. So anything to help me manage my mouth and intense emotions is a big bonus. 

Anyone else have little tips you use in the scary moments?