I haven’t posted here before, but hoping for some support. Recently have had a lot of stress and finding it difficult to manage my ruminating negative thoughts. A lot of bad encounters with friends and even just random strangers while going about my life. It’s like I’m magnetizing negative energy. Also a super stressful divorce, and just everything seems to be going wrong. I had several really horrible years during an abusive marriage which I got out of last year and this year met a wonderful person who is my match in every way and the LOML. Also transitioned to a new job that is going really well. Now, it seems like a lot of my friends who were there for me when I was down bad are closing off to me/rejecting me now that things are finally going right. And it really hurts. One lifelong friend in particular appears to be totally ghosting me. I’ve wracked my brain trying to think of why and what I could have done. Have even directly asked, but I get equivocating/avoidant responses and then when we set aside time to catch up I am ignored/sent to voicemail. I also have a really difficult sibling relationship that has always been volatile and is causing me stress. It’s hard not to focus on the bad feelings and enjoy the good. I feel isolated and so sad. My anxiety is so high I was on the cusp of a panic attack last night before listening to my mediation app and finally dozing off for an hour or so. Been awake and ruminating since then and can’t shut off my negative self talk. I tried to engage in planning things that are helpful to others like donating/volunteering since that usually helps to take the focus off myself and do some good. But I’m still struggling deeply. How do I manage these feelings? It felt like such a horrible time for so long and just when things started going right, they took a hard left again.