The only interactions I have with my memory are cringe attacks. Soon after a good moment, I will happily think about it. But what spontaneously comes to my mind are only the worst moments of my life. It's like my brain reinterprets basic interactions, or even moments were at the time I though was good, into situations to avoid at all cost. It's like I can only take the worst of my experiences, and it discourages me to do things.