Lately things have been really bad and my depression has been at an all time high. I sorta want to just give up. I dont want to feel normal again.  I want to ruin my life because I don't deserve any better than that. Idk I know this is dumb but does anyone else ever feel that way? I just want to lay in bed all day every day or I want to sh or sometimes I just wish I could try drugs. I dont know if this made any sense but I I ok not have anywhere else to get this out.