I was joking about having 2 girlfriends(there was a specific reason why I joked about this but that’s another story) and she said “What? Actually, yes you could have 2 girlfriends, but does that mean I get to have 2 boyfriends?”. I told her she couldn’t and she said “That’s not fair.” I know this is my fault. I acted like a jerk for a whole day. I had accidentally fell asleep and once I woke up I saw she texted me. It said “Come back. I was playing.” I answered her but I was still pissed off. She said “I was playing. You obviously don’t believe me?”

I continued to act like a jerk and she said “If you’re gonna act like this then bye.” I tried to say something else and she responded “No bye.” I messaged her the next day and she cut the conversations short and to make matters worse I thought nothing happened. I asked her why was she so distant and she said “I feel like i’m annoying you” I told her she wasn’t annoying which didn’t work. She does this a lot. Simply because her mother made her feel like she’s annoying and I probably didn’t help. I lost my patience and I ended up losing my temper once again. I played it all like I was the victim. Part of that was I felt like she was at fault(not taking responsibility)and like I already mentioned I thought nothing happened which is weird.

I said “I miss you. Stop ignoring me. You’re gonna make me upset.” She said “Sorry” I responded “You should be.” She said “Of course I should be.” I said “Mhm” I should’ve accepted her apology right then and there. That “You should be” is horrible. What a jerk. I said all of this out of anger. I just want to talk to her. There’s 2 sides to every story. There’s a reason why I said what I said. I literally do not want 2 girlfriends. She’s just enough.

She left saying “K then I don’t know if I will talk to you anymore because I only make you mad. I’m not enough. You deserve better. You’re out of my league. Sorry for everything.” I asked if she was gone forever and she said “I don’t know, I don’t want to leave you but I just don’t know how to make you happy anymore.” Before she unfriended me she put “lmaoo” on her profile which is acceptable. I was gaslighting, blaming her, turned the tables on her, and accusing. I’ve never went this far. I always had short temper problems and would get upset with her. I usually would get upset, take a break and apologize. With no intentions of silent treatment. This time was unacceptable. It angers me knowing that I pretended nothing happened and completely was inconsiderate of her feelings. Wtf.

My dad was physically and verbally abusive towards my mother and he would sometimes emotionally abuse his children. Maybe that’s where I picked it up from. The anger issues is something my dad dealt with, Blaming and not taking the victim is what my dad did, Acting like a dick is what my dad did, Silent treatment is also what my dad did. I’m turning into him. I always wanted the best for her. Please take it easy, I know I was a dick. No need to make me feel worse but criticism is expected. A couple of weeks before this happened I told her I was sorry for treating her bad and she said “You don’t treat me bad love” honestly she probably was just saying that. Imagine her saying “It’s ok.” 

TL;DR I found out I was emotionally abusive towards my girlfriend and she left. Can I get her back?