I’ve been experiencing a depressive episode pretty deeply for a couple of weeks now. I’m medicated for my disorder, but for some reason the meds aren’t helping. I also work full time in a physically and emotionally demanding job, and have been struggling to keep up. I live with my boyfriend. He tries to be supportive but I feel that any time I’m vulnerable enough to come to him for support, he does or says something slightly backhanded that makes me uncomfortable. Last night I looked sad, and my boyfriend wouldn’t stop asking me why. I eventually was honest and told him that I have no motivation anymore. That I felt like an alien in my own life, and nothing familiar has been bringing me security and comfort. Nothing I usually like has been bringing me any kind of happiness and I feel like I’m losing my mind. I can’t stop thinking about suicide. He comforted me and we moved on. A couple hours later it was like 1 am and I could not sleep because I had so much anxiety and was so depressed. I asked him to cuddle with me, and told him I thought I would have to call out for my job, which I have to wake up at 6 am for. I told him my heart wouldn’t stop beating so fast and that I couldn’t sleep. He said okay, then said “why didn’t you go to sleep earlier.” I know this seems small, but when i was feeling so bad and anxious this is the worst thing he could’ve said. It made me more anxious, and made me feel like he hasn’t been listening, or maybe truly believing what I’ve been saying.  He constantly throws in little comments like this. Am I wrong for feeling weird about this? I don’t want to inflate something in my head that isn’t actually an issue but it has always seemed like a red flag to me.