I feel like the old me is dead. Like I don't recognize who I am now vs who I was then. 

I know this isn't just "being in my 20s" I've changed a lot over the past 3.5 years after a traumatic relationship ended and after years of not processing all the trauma I've endured. That fucks with you. It definitely altered how I see myself and how I see others. 

I just don't recognize myself and I feel like in response to my trauma, I killed that girl that I used to be. I isolated myself (still do) and made impulsive changes and I don't recognize myself. 

It almost genuinely feels like that was another lifetime, not me a few years ago, but another person in another lifetime. I'm stuck in this pattern of flashbacks of memories from my childhood that make me feel nostalgic and simultaneously suicidal. 

I think the passage of time mixed with the lack of sense of self just really fucks with me, and it gets more intense with age.