I remember the feeling of being so incredibly alone and empty my first few weeks on meds each time I've come off of a break from meds. It was like I was led to a cliffside overnight and left there to find my way back to society, alone.

It's been hard to keep my access to meds open, it wasn't really a choice to go off them.

I'm really dreading that feeling. I really kind of rely on my delusional thinking, so I'm about to lose my crutch. I'm just looking for someone to talk to before I finally pop that pill. I'm also watching the new "Stranger Things" if anyone wants to chat about it.

It's just Quetiapine tonight. Me and the doc will work on adding more to it next week.