I feel like shit all the time and recently found out my grandpa has had depression his whole life. He was a shit father and borderline abusive, also an animal abuser and has been on lithium more than half his life. I inherit a lot of physical traits from him too 
I force myself not to share my feelings n stuff with others because I always regret it, idk I thought this one friend would be different. I literally texted her all this and she replied “that sucks my family is really hot.” Like I know it’s a joke but wtf man. I’m here crying that I might be depressed my entire life and that’s what you have to say? I have no one else and this is probably also talking to a wall but oh well.