I'm 21, dealing with debt, wasted 2 years of my university getting awful grades. I disappoint my family left and right.i have no confidence in myself, and I hate my body. I was low-key molested by my best friend when he was drunk. my childhood dog had to be put down after I took care of her for 2 months prior and I feel like its my fault.tht I could've done something better or idk. I find solace in anime but even that is starting feel dull. I thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life and career but I'm so lost. I dont know what to do and at this point I feel like ive ruined my life beyond repair. I know im 21 and most people just say that im young and I just have too dust everything off and it'll be fine. but its not, it never is and ive been in this loop of depression since I was 12. I think about taking my life and then think about how selfish it is to my friends family and little sister. I can't do that to her. and yet I still think about i. I'm so lost.