I have been feeling off all day. Sickly. I left work early too.. I was stupid and decided to go out and got a few drinks that hit hard which just made me feel more dizzy and off. 

So for hours it affected me which is abnormal because once I start walking around I usually sober up pretty fast. I didn’t drink anything unusual. 

But still feeling sickly, I went home and fell asleep for a few hours and my boyfriend woke me up gently and I felt really heavy and my heart was racing weirdly. So again I wasnt thinking and took a cbd gummy that ive taken many times before, thinking it would calm me down from panicking. 

So you can see how all my idiotic decisions are affecting my already crappy anxiety. 

But I am addicted to diphenhydramine and I have work tomorrow so I just took a 50mg pill, went to sit down, and for the first time in my life, my anxiety went...

“hey. You’re going to die in your sleep tonight. Say goodbye to your loved ones just in case. Everything you took tonight is gonna mix horribly”

I have never had such a thought cross my mind before because im a dumb young adult- I hardly worry about dying...

why am I freaking the hell out...? I don’t want to sleep now...my chest feels painful but not in an anxious way- I think...more like real pain..