I had finally been getting the help by going to an outpatient program so I can get the skills to manage my symptoms and they put me on some new meds that effect me negatively and expect me to drive myself there. I'm barely able to keep myself awake and are telling me that if I dont show up I'm being discharged. I actually thought they cared but all they care about is gouging the insurance for money. I'm at a point where I'm done with it all and want it all to just end. I feel like a failure and afraid that my fiance will leave me because she's sick of my problems. I keep thinking about taking all my pills so I can just finally sleep and not have to worry about any of this anymore. I cant even hold a job for more than 3 months because I either get too anxious or just lose motivation to even be there. I'm just done with it all and wouldnt mind just passing away in my sleep. I just don't know what to do at this point.