You know what really eats me up inside, it’s the fact that the outside world has torn me up apart. I’ve been picked on and judged for the way I talk, speak, think or anything. I’ve been raped several times. And all that shit has fucked me up. 

So now that I’ve withdrawn myself and choose to stay indoors all day, the very same people come knocking on my door, calling me weird and judging me for not going outdoors. 

I simply cannot win. It’s like I suck at living. I don’t know which way to push. And most importantly, I don’t feel like having any part of my existence anymore.