Last year around this same time I was at the lowest point I had ever been. I was self-harming, every single second of life felt so fucking terrible. Two days ago I went out with my friend group and over that night some things happened that I feel really guilty for. I don't want to talk to any of the people in that friend group anymore. After that day the depressive feelings have been rising up until today. I broke. I have never felt so terrible since last year I again feel completly alone and I feel like I can't do anything about it. Because of the shit that happened I'm shutting off the closest friend I have ever had. I feel so gulty I can't. I self-harmed for the first time in a year. I'm genuinly thinking about killing myself right now.