Surprisingly, I haven't seemed to become addicted to any one substance as I can go for a really long time without an individual one. Despite this, I think I may be the addicted to being high in general, and am afraid of sobriety. I have the strong impulse to uses in pretty much every mindset, if I want to celebrate, if I'm sad and want to drown my sorrows, or if I'm empty and need to feel something to bring me back. It has gotten significantly worse since I stopped self-harming and I think I'm using it as a replacement. Is this really better than self-harm, just because it's less visible? What happens if I don't want to stop?

TL:DR Can't stand to be sober, can't find a reason to bear it. 