
Hi r/mentalillness community,

I have been having an extremely hard time letting me bestie go after she asked to be FWB, told me she loves me, and ghosted me when I told her I love her back and can’t just be FWB or whatever that is. I know I’m in the wrong but something inside of me broke and I have been harassing her and staking her on social media. I really care about her and we’ve been best friends our whole life. I hate how I’ve been acting but it’s almost like I have developed ocd and I obsessively try to ruin her life cause I feel she ruined mine. It’s unfair for her and I realize the error of my ways. It’s gotten so bad her sister is threatening a restraining order and civil court for emotional and stalking damage. Something in my head tells me fuck it and just keep contacting her and crying to her to be my friend again. But this is too much and I feel terrible. Like I lost all my friends and never will be happy again unless she becomes my friend again. I’ve decided I need to get therapy and possibly medication so I can handle my abandonment issues better. I don’t want to be this guy and I do love her like real love. So I want her to be free of me.

If anyone has advice for me. Or just wants to say I’m a freak, I understand. Any comments I’ll take seriously and respond!

tl/dr - I’ve been stalking my ex bestfriend and harassing her badly. I want to stop but feel I can’t.