I've been seeing this amazing girl, and she's completing her degree and is highly motivated. I recently stopped studying and only have very part time freelance work. On the relationship side of things I am very happy, but on a personal and spiritual level I feel empty, I don't really have a purpose anymore and miss having one. I've been feeling lost and depressed, and guilty for bringing that energy into her life. The start of the year I felt more alive and happy but now I feel like I'm just wasting time doing nothing, filling time with YouTube videos, not knowing what to do. I am going to start seeing a therapist this week, and want to get back into the gym because that's one thing that really improved my mental health. But I still feel purposeless, I am a musician and work with computers but don't really know what to do next. The whole pandemic turned everything on its head and I just finished recovering from Covid. I just kind of feel dead inside and I hate it... I miss feeling excited for life.