I’m tired of the way I get treated at home, most of the time the only person who treats me right is my mom (I live with my parents, brother, and sister with her boyfriend and three kids). 

I can’t leave because my anxiety won’t let me hold down a job for more than a day. I can’t even go out anywhere and don’t have friends or ever dated. Most of the family I have (out of household) are messed up and don’t care about me at all, the rest are practically strangers. I feel like I literally have no one else besides my mom. 

I’m on medicine, but I feel like it doesn’t help much. The doctor just changes my dosage whenever I tell him that. Everything else like therapy and psychiatrists are too expensive and I’m too scared to go. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t even have dreams or goals anymore. I feel like I’m literally still going because of my mom, my sisters kids, and my fear of after. I’ve been dealing with this since I was 10, which was 12 years ago. I thought things were changing for me, but nothing has changed and it feels like it’s never going to. I’m just so tired.