I got diagnosed with bpd yesterday. I've spent 21 years of my life blaming my aspergers. I thought my aspergers was the reason I couldn't get any women to want to date me. I thought my aspergers was the reason that I am so suicidal. I thought my aspergers was the reason that I lash out at my family. No it was my bpd the whole entire time. I hate everything about myself. I'm incapable of being loved. How could somebody love a freak like me? I'm so worthless. Nobody would miss me if I just disappeared.