I took dxm last night. I learned that was a mistake. I'm sorry for my behavior on this sub. It triggered an episode and I still feel the effects. My cousin helped me calm down but I only got 2 hours of sleep and I dont feel well. 

I'm feeling the comedown. I didn't even take enough to trip yet I tripped hard. Ever since my SZ diagnosis drugs hit me differently. I feel like an idiot. No wonder my mom doesnt want me to be home alone. I make stupid decisions. I have really bad impulse control. I drink when the idea pops into my head. I do drugs when the idea pops into my head. I cant say no. I once chugged 5 shots worth of vodka mixed with juice. Drinking is bad for me though. I get into psychosis. I'm not like a normal drunk person. I lose touch. I start getting messages and I call people on the phone to tell them. I got my phone taken away because I was crying and about to call a complete stranger. I'm ashamed to drink in front of people.