I remember being very depressed as a teen and feeling absolutely awful and suicidal. I got diagnosed with social anxiety (I can manage it quite well nowadays) in my teens and BPD in the last year. I'm pretty sure I could have met the criteria for MDD as a teen, but somehow, I think I got out of it.   


However, when I think about  "how" I overcame depression, there's really no proof in my mind other than "I still enjoy drawing and making videos, I haven't lost interest in those hobbies, therefore, I'm not depressed" and that's all. And since I don't feel bad every single day of my life, like maybe for 3 weeks straight, I'm actually fine. I don't feel awesome either, but it's more like "living is tolerable today, thanks god, it's a nice break", so I  assumed I couldn't have depression either. But I came across the term "depressive episodes" and now this is confusing me....  


Like if I STILL have MDD, then it's hard for me to tell it apart from my bpd. I feel like they are intertwined somehow. 

 I think part of me don't want to admit I have depression because I tend to perceive it as a weakness. People often say they have depression to gain compassion (as it should!) but I feel like if I say I have depression, all I hear myself saying is "bohoo, I'm a self-pity kind of person" and I'd never want to project that image. Heck, if I have to display my mental health struggles to people, at most, I'd say "I have anxiety and relationship issues".   
Thoughts, comments or anything would be appreciated.