I turned 24 earlier this month. I don’t know what love is. Grew up in a loveless house surrounded by dysfunctional family members with untreated mental illnesses. Never said "I love you" to anyone, never received it. Never had a boyfriend, just grown men grooming and using me when I was a teen.

January has been awful so far. Everything is falling apart. The thought of suicide used to feel conforting but not anymore especially when I realize that I will die with an empty heart who never got to know love. And it hurts.