Of course nothing new for me, but I am once again pushing my newest best friend away by making sure her relationship with her bf is settled and happy. I’ve been helping both of them through this and now that things are finally settling down, my thoughts say “okay this is perfect now you can slip away from her easily as time passes because she has a good bf.....” things like relationships are so momentary and temporary for me that I’m not used to having someone close to me in my life for more than 2yrs. It’s hit the 2y mark and it’s so hard atm to maintain our friendship for me. 

She’s been notified of my disorders for a month now and just recently she read up on some things that explains bpd and stuff. I haven’t had someone really care about my mental health like this so maybe I’m just not used to it but it almost feels worse than better you know? DAE relate? How do you lessen the sabotage part of it all???