Sorry, I'm just moaning. It seems there isn't anything that can help at this point

I guess I should probably be happy these days. I've "had" (she's not an object but I couldn't think of another word) for a few weeks, she's really nice and beautiful and far better than I could ever deserve. Before I met her I was thinking I would end things soon, before the end of the year maybe, but now that doesn't seem like an option.

But the thing is, I still just can't seem to feel any emotion or enjoyment or pleasure or relief or anything, I'm still just an empty shell. It seems like I'm just always gonna be this numb, foggy, neurotic waste of space, nothing seems to help. And there's no escape.

Sorry to be depressing