For days have I been alone in my dorm, my best friend is either high up on the clouds of her achievements or busy with here boyfriend. I can’t get a good conversation aside from an event we met a week ago. I don’t blame her for having a better life, but her ego has just been puncturing my view of her. Aside from that, nearly all of my friends are not present and I am left alone yet again, I have posted a few times here regarding my mental health, however I could barely get a hold of being normal. My best friend I mentioned earlier is a bit insensitive to say the least, she kept bragging about she’s my only help and that I registered her as my emergency hotline if anything happens to me. Of course teasing here and there about impersonal shit doesn’t phase me one bit, but this is something that is meant to be hidden from others. So now even if I wanted to talk I can’t talk to her, she always thinks she’s above me and her words are always right compared to mine. The cuts on my hand are about to heal, I just want to feel pain again to escape my mental struggle.

So now I am alone, with no one to talk with. Another person I tried to give affection towards ignored me recently, I always know that I’m unatractive so I guess she left me for that and that’s fine, since I don’t want to be with me either. I havd given up hope of living a normal college life. Internship is coming up and I will be more alone than before with no one to comfort me. I’m scared of being alone since I had that trauma. Help.