i lost my last fp around 2019/2020, we are on good terms now but it is not the same. it was my fault we stopped being friends, i got upset bc we got in a fight so i took like a bunch of xanax and freaked out on her. i feel so empty with out seeing her everyday everything feels off and wrong and like its not supposed to be like this. i keep trying to find another favorite person but nothing is the same, i have friends but i always seem to come up with a reason to not like them. i feel like all i do is try and find someone to obsess over and love bc if i dont have that, life doesnt feel like its worth living. nothing is fun and nothing makes me laugh, i only feel content when im with her but thats not very often. i dont understand how people are able to just be alone or have more then one friend. im just rly sick of feeling empty inside bc of another person.