I can honestly say that I did not have a happy life growing up. I have happy memories from my childhood, of course. But I can't ever recall being truly happy and carefree and all that. My home life wasn't always great as my parents fought like cats and dogs a lot. Nothing abusive or anything of the sort, just the tiniest things would set them off and I'd always have to be in earshot of it. My school life was also, of course, not great either. I was (and still am) a loner who only really had friends in elementary school. But from middle school onwards, I was on my own. No birthday parties to go to, no summer breaks spent with friends, not even any romantic relationships. Just me, myself and I.

But, I did find some small measure of comfort in books and movies. And I found the most comfort, and safety, in the Harry Potter series. I was never really imaginative, but found myself sucked in every time I opened one of the books or watched the movies. At the very least, they were a break from reality for me and gave me entertainment, joy and happiness when I needed it most.

So, I decided to give the Return to Hogwarts documentary a watch and thought it was great. Seeing the people I practically grew up with all back together again, having that same level of love and affection for each other was heartwarming. But, upon reflection, I found myself feeling depressed because it reminded me of so many of the things I never had growing up and what I missed out on, all because of my shyness and inability to connect with people. I knew that if Hogwarts was real, I'd have no place in it. If anything, I'd probably turn out like Tom Riddle, minus the being evil and having a desire for world domination, of course.

I've never told anyone this but had an urge to get it all out and off my chest. Sorry again if this doesn't belong here.