so basically i haven’t really been having a great summer. my ex boyfriend of 3 years (whose also my fp) broke up with me because he just felt like he “couldn’t do this anymore”, my best friend made out with some random boy in my house next to me and basically made me thirdwheel they kept ignoring me until i stormed out of the room, my best friend also triggered some bad memories and caused me to cry for 1-2 hours, my ex boyfriend also messaged me a few days after he got into a relationship telling me that he got into one and thought i “deserved to know” so i would stop trying to get with him, i have cut all my friends off like blocked them on social media because they don’t treat me well and they don’t understand my bpd so they trigger me easily, i have sat in my room for hours alone in the dark and i feel like my emotions and thoughts have really began to eat me up. i’ve never had so many triggers in one month it’s so exhausting i wish that i didn’t have to go through any of this it’s so unfair. like i genuinely do wish that people didn’t treat me the way they did/do it’s completely teared me apart and my ex boyfriend still wants to be friends with me which i don’t know why he does, he wants to help me but i don’t think he realises how selfish it is of him to want to still be friends with me and want to help me because i will not get over him my brain literally refuses to and i see him as the only good thing in my life. i also am not in therapy yet so my bpd is untreated and i have found it hard to deal with. i feel so sick and betrayed by everyone around me. i don’t have that grey area in my thinking either so i basically only see everyone as evil and it’s hard to change my opinion on this. if anyone has any tips for dealing with bpd i would appreciate it! thank u.