TL;DR How can i increase my girlfriends sex drive to more closely match mine/get us back to where we were? 


We've been together for a year now, and the sexual intimacy was pretty frequent and with little to no resistance. She describes herself as a people pleaser. I THINK the strong intimacy in the beginning was partially her being a people pleaser and wanting to make a good impression (I think this is normal in most new relationships?) 

We moved in together. shes also memtioned that she likes to distract her angst and depression by keeping busy with projects (a lot of which are home DIY projects now). I feel like this takes a lot out of her and she's left with not much capacity for intimacy with me. 

I get anxious sometimes and initially I thought she was having mixed feelings (confronted and confirmed NOT to be true), but my shitty brain also entertains the idea that she bamboozled me - aka showed me this love and physical affection and now that we've crossed a commitment threshold he's withdrawing the thing she 'roped' me in with, or that its exactly as she says - she doesn't have the capacity with all the stuff going on... She did mention something that I can summarize as being in a 'phase' of emotions and the byproduct of that is less capacity for sex. 

I loath the idea that she 'lets me' have sex with her when she can deal with it. I know how that sounds, and she's very loving otherwise... But physical intimacy is, apparently, something *very* important to me and I can easily spiral into circular irrational self destructive thoughts when im not able to express that.... Having sex doesn't feel better if I feel like I'm getting it as a favor since its an US thing for me and not me trying to get a nut. 

She has mentioned before (while our frequency was higher [maybe twice a week? Which is perfect]) that she thinks her medication (SSRIs) are known to contribute to low sex drive. 

So.... For those of you that are still with me... Is there some kind of dietary dish or tea that can help women who are taking SSRI anti-depressants who have low libido/sex drive? 

Thank you 🙏