I know no one owes me sex(or anything for that matter) and that if he wants to masturbate he can, but I always get this crippling sense of him not being attracted to me or not loving me anymore bc of it. Outwardly, I know that sex doesn’t equal love but that doesn’t change the way that bpd makes me react and feel. It’ correlates in my brain as: ‘oh you’d rather masturbate in a bathroom alone while I’m over here offering bjs like they’re coupons, so something is obviously wrong with me and you don’t love me anymore.’ Which I know isn’t true and is wrong but it completely demolishes me anyways. I’ve been working on these feelings very hard for the last two years but none of that matters when he “rejects” me. It’s results in me splitting and HATING him for it when he didn’t do anything wrong and I hate myself because of it. Any advice or related feelings so I don’t feel so alone in this? 