I have a severe depression (more than 6 months I think), basically I can't do nothing and lost all the joy of doing anything I liked. I was doing computer science degree, really liked programming. But right now I feel sad. I stopped doing therapy for some weeks since my therapist gave up on me, he said I wasnt doing nothing to change my reality. I also tried to find a job, but I'm unemployed, I see all my friends with jobs on big tech companies like IBM,google,etc and I'm here, feeling like a failure. Everyday I have constant suicidal thoughts and that I'm a bad programmer. I don't know, I just want to disappear sometimes.