I am struggling so much at the moment. I have a mental health nurse who was meant to see me for a home visit but now he is saying that I have to either go in to hospital tomorrow to get admitted, or go to work. I have such low energy it's killing me.

I am just really depressed and I have been self harming, but I don't want to go to work because I'm ashamed of what I must look like to people. 

I wish I could go to sleep and then when I wake up all of this is behind me and I'm a functioning adult, who is able to cope with my fucking life.