I legitimately haven’t felt this bad since 3 years. I always try my best to be the positive one regardless of everything because I find it helps me feel better too. I am so very thankful for everything that I have but I feel bad when complaining about the things I have to do. I feel bad because everyone worries for me and I don’t want them to be sad over me. I just don’t know what to do with myself, having high functioning anxiety is a curse. I get things done but I’m never satisfied and there’s always something that sucks. I wanna yell at every professor I have because I’m so frustrated at how everyone pretends to be nice but isn’t considerate or doesn’t adapt to the whole online learning thing. I don’t understand how I do my work and your work and pay more than normal only to feel this crap about everything I do. I feel like I’m submitting things to submit them, without learning. I have finals coming up now and it feels like I just will not get past because there’s simply no resources to. I usually like to depend on people for emotional comfort but I realize that, that is toxic to some people and I don’t wanna just have someone around to depend on. I want to depend on myself instead of having a token person to throw my problems onto. It’s really hard though and I’m just sat there wondering what to do with myself