My whole life I've been treated like crap, no one ever showed me any sign of caring or compassion, I've been constantly screamed at, ignored and belittled, even my parents don't care, whenever I try to say anything I'm either left on read or straight up told to shut up and with time I started developing depression and at this point I don't want to heal because I don't want to be here anymore.

I grew up feeling like an alien in a world that I don't understand, why are people so cruel and careless, why can't I even have one real friend, I did my absolute best but there's no result except feeling lonelier and more misunderstood and isolated from society.

I followed some advice like going to therapy and it was unsuccessful, I've heard some people say that going outside was a good idea, well first of all I don't have anyone to hang out with and most importantly seeing everyone outside enjoying their lives surrounded by their loved ones made want to end it on the spot because it reminds me of how miserable I am.

The sadness doesn't go away it only increases and that nonsensical bs of "you'll only give the pain to your loved ones" doesn't work for me because I have literally no one so you know what maybe I should just leave as I'm just a waste of space on this earth.

I've never felt this sad before this year, and at the end of the day this is just too much for me to handle, I can't do it anymore this pain is unbearable, I don't see the point in living, life is full of misery and suffering and to be honest I don't think I'll pass the night, the time has come for me to stop it my way.