while back, my ex and I split due to my bpd because I wasn't in therapy now and fucked up pretty badly constantly. they were out of my life for over a year, and they reached out to me recently and we made up. We talked about our relationship's issues and are friends again, and have set boundries and communicate to keep it healthy. (we aren't going to get back together, even though my BPD is more manageable now and Im in therapy, we were too different and wanted different things in life for it to work.) They were my Favorite Person when we were dating, and I got very clingy.   
However, now that we are back in each others life, Ive been having VERY confusing feelings for them. I can tell with how I want their approval, think about them constantly and want to talk to them all the time and can get jealous when they talk to others, that they are still my FP. ( i recognize these as unhealthy and am working on them) I feel a deep, strong love for them, that I think its just/mostly platonic given how close we used to be, and how similar we are. But...at times I feel like its something more. Sometimes I feel a strong romantic love for them, and miss them greatly. It makes me want to get back with them, even though I know I dont \*want\* to get back with them , if that makes sense? Its something I don't actually want, but at times I feel like i do. But that urge fades fast. The romantic feelings don't last forever and change, so its exhausting for me. The confusion about how I feel is more painful than the feelings themselves. I know for sure I have some small romantic feelings for them, and that doesn't bother me because when I know what my feelings are I can manage them.   
one of the concerning things is i still fantasize about them holding me, or kissing or having sex. But those are only when Im trying to sleep, holding my body pillow and at my loneliness, so im pretty sure thats the loneliness taking control.   
Does anyone else experience the confusion of which is which? ive never had that happen before, and I want to figure it out so I can set boundries to keep it in check/help it fade. But because I dont know whats what I don't know where to begin. Am I confusing the kinds of love, or is what I think is romantic love me just being nostalgic?