My best days have been days I've purposely skipped meals. I  feel really calm and focused, it's like my anxiety is almost gone. 

I normally have a lot of trouble eating but I'm usually able to force my meals down. I don't suffer from anorexia and I don't have strong body positivity issues, but I still purposely miss meals sometimes. I haven't eaten or drinkin at all today and was actually able to stay engaged in class and calm during conversation with my classmates.

I'm really confused why this is. I know later this evening I'm going to crash and feel like shit but it really helps and I don't know why. I do suffer from self harm and I'm not sure if thats connected. It's worth noting that self harm helps with my appetite (I've been clean for a little bit so eating has been really hard).

Has anyone else experienced this or has advice on eating more? Thank you so much for reading 💙.