This just started playing on my playlist (thank you algorithm), and it reminded me of a time in my life where this was very much my daily life. Hopelessly devoted to my toxic ex, and just wanting to avoid life with him. 

I may not be doing well now, but atleast I broke the cycle. I'm still processing all the abuse, and how many opportunities I gave up to devote all my attention to this person who was the cruelest  person I've ever met. I'll take the little wins.

The song is "Every Night by Montell Fish". Lyrics below:

Drugs, the sex, the lights
I think I want it all like every night
And God, I know it's wrong, it feels so right
I think I want it all like every night
The drugs, the sex, the lights
I think I want it all like every night
And God, I know it's wrong, it feels so right
I think I want it all like every night

I'm so ashamed
Of what I've become
I know I can't run
This is my way
I can't fathom
All this fakin'
I'm done fakin'
Fakin' for you

Drugs, the sex, the lights
I think I want it all like every night
And God, I know it's wrong, it feels so right
I think I want it all like every night
The drugs, the sex, the lights
I think I want it all like every night
And God, I know it's wrong, it feels so right
I think I want it all like every night
The dr-

Does anyone else relate?