I don't know what it is but I feel as if I consciously choose if I will empathize with someone or not. It bleeds into disasters too. i.e 9/11, the pulse shootings, Paris shootings ect. i look at these posts and people crying about humans they don't even know on a personal level and I feel so disconnected or conned by these humans who are either genuine or just conforming to what's socially acceptable. 
for likes? a need to belong? Idk. 
And yeah, I know I should be the last person to make that observation because I have a constant need to belong and have an existential crisis every other day but it just feels fake. 
Another example is when mourning or watching a loved one get eaten up by cancer. I'm very in tuned with death and accept it OR mbyy I'm just a cold ass bitch. 
I remember a time I had to force myself to cry in front of family to look normal because everyone was on the brink. 
In situations like that I have always been the one to talk to my family member in hospice like an actual human; reminisced instead of just crying nonstop. 
My perspective may be fucked but I'm able to intellectually stimulate them on their death bed. Stayed 18hr days talking, feeding, and reading what scripture they believed in.
Because of this I was always seen as a caregiver but in reality I will never mourn their deaths and never will because death is the only constant. Yes, i appreciate and respect their existence but I just don't have that intense emotion that others project. Is this normal? Am I shit person or what?