I feel like I wasn’t made to work. Does anyone have as much hatred and depression towards going to work that I do? I’m not lazy. I’ve held jobs for years and always do my best. But actually going is extremely difficult for me. 

My first job, I stayed at for 2 years. But everyday I went in, I cried and contemplated doing a no call no show and just going home. I paid thousands to go to college to get a job at a hospital, and after one week, I quit because mentally I couldn’t handle getting up everyday and working 8 hours them coming home and doing it again. I was a stay at home mom for a little while, and I loved it but felt I needed money for the family and got back out there. I worked part time until management basically let me go because there were no hours to give. Now, i have another full time job with an amazing staff, but every night I lose sleep because I’m tossing and turning, thinking about the fact that I have to work the next morning. I cry before every shift, and dread getting out of my car when I get there. I know this sounds like I’m being a privileged baby, but I do try very hard to keep pushing and keep going but I’m miserable. 

Is this my depression? I’m not on any medication, and besides work, I feel okay mood wise. If I got to stay home, I would feel less depressed. Why do I feel this way? Why do I struggle so much to go to work? Please tell me I’m not alone. 