My therapist seems to believe I have cyclothymia or bipolar 2. We are still exploring it and I have an appointment with a psychiatrist coming up. I’m having a hard time accepting this diagnosis, but also sometimes it makes so much sense. 
No body around me suspects anything is going on with me, I’m open with my friends about my feelings to an extent but I also feel like everyone has these same feelings so it’s not worth complaining about or expressing. I thought everyone lived with these ups and downs, but it seems mine are a bit disproportionate to reality at times and are making it really hard for me to breathe easily on a daily basis. I feel like I’m constantly battling myself. I’m afraid to just come off like a baby or being a drama Queen, or being weak. Life is hard for everyone isn’t it?!!!! Maybe I’m just having an existential crisis. My life on paper is good, how could I be so ungrateful and miserable? I don’t know what it would take to convince me.