I mishandled a situation with my husband a few days ago. I let my emotions take over and it really hurt him. I still don't quite understand it, because it didn't seem that bad to me. Anyway, we made up, sort of; got back to a place of hugs and minor affection, but he has shown no interest in me otherwise. He's been buried in a video game and sleeping when I'm awake and awake when I'm asleep for two days now. During the fight I dissociated pretty badly, but can't back for us to talk out out. While talking it out I told him I was in a good place to listen because it's what he needed. He talked of all the things about my behavior that are hard to deal with for him. This caused me to disassociate again. And I keep waiting to come back, to feel better. After two days I woke up feeling the same way and I just started bawling. Why am I this way?  I'm so tired. I NEED this to stop, and I can't control it? Why am I so weak? I'm losing my husband to this disease and all I can do is watch it happen so detached that out just looks like I'm numb when on the inside I'm planning my own death. How do I get out of this mess? Please help?