I recently learned I have BPD after I split on my husband and decided to go to therapy for the first time with all the mental turmoil. 

My husband and I were closing on a house when I started thinking about all the things I didnt like about him and that switch flipped. It was too late to back out of the house. Its been 2 months of me giving him no affection or attention because I dont feel anything. 

I dont know what to do. I want to run away so bad that I've even looked at apartments and jobs in a different state.  I want to leave but I also don't want to regret it un the future. I'm in such a bad place and I don't know what to do.