"There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable... I simply am not there."

I've been doing so good after my IOP therapy but I still just feel like I'm not a real person. I don't know who I am or what I want to do with my life. I feel like I'm wasting time trying to figure it out. My obsessions are intense but brief. I can't find one thing to hold onto and stay steady with, everything goes through my mind like a big flash bang and then I'm on to the next until I drive it into the ground. 

Just venting. I'm aggravated and it's 3AM and I can't sleep.  