its been almost four years since i was dumped and yet it still haunts me. i don’t purposefully try to dwell on it, the complete opposite actually; i’ve tried desperately to move on, to distract myself, to get it out of my head.


i was severely attached and codependent to my partner and the breakup was very sudden. i found out that i did not know my partner like i thought i did (if at all), and my entire world turned upside down. then, a couple years later, my ‘best friend’ suddenly cut me off to unite with my ex instead.


i have nightmares about it, my ex-partner haunts me in my dreams; i have panic attacks when i see old pictures and i’m terrified of anything remotely similar to them. it feels like a trauma in so many ways, but i feel ridiculous for saying so.


i have bpd and cptsd, if it matters. i was thinking maybe because of those, the instance hit me harder? i don’t know. do you think its fair to call this stuff trauma? if not, what is it? thanks in advance!