I don’t know what to do. I don’t even have a DBT treatment plan. Just medication. My therapist ghosted me. My psychiatrist told me if I needed to I should. 

I almost feel like I need to go go walk in outpatient clinic to just grab the reigns of my treatment and get more in depth treatment. I feel so lost. I don’t know what to do, I feel like there’s something seriously wrong with me and my doctor isn’t giving me the hell I really need. My BPD is getting worse with age. 

I’m not a danger to myself (thanks Wellbutrin) but I’m still struggling a lot. 

I’m damaging relationships around me, dragging ppl down with my negativity, splitting, one second I’m fine the next I’m screaming at my ex husband (He is my FP and still important to me/very supportive and tries really hard to be there for me) 

I keep pushing him away telling me to leave me alone and move on even tho I still want him around. He knows I’m not serious and reassured me he will be around. 

I’m having a hard time explaining it, but I feel like some of you may understand.