Hi. Just wanted to share my story. I mean, it's not a big deal, many people has worse than me, but I just wanted to write it off.

Starting from the beggining. My parents were arguing hard as ling as I can remember. In my primary school I was psychicaly and mentwllt abused. I always tried to avoid school, and just spend my time on computer. Time was passing nothing changed.

 At the end of my primary school (primary school, at the time lasts 6 grades), my mom told me that she's fed up with my attitude (playing, and avoiding school, no close friends) she bring me to the psychologist who gave me some pills, which should "calm me a bit" it was a package of antidepressant pills. I've became a zombie. I was sleeping all days, couldn't understand what people are saying to me. I've stopped taking them after consultation with theraphist, once again, time was passing, nothing changed for better.

It started to be evem worse when I started junior high school. I was struggling with everything. I just wanted to play alone, to find calmness, but I couldn't. It was almost peak of my addiction. I've finished jhs, with heavy addiciton.

At the time of high school, it was peak of my addiction. I refused to going to school, refused any people, living In dark room with pillows on my blinds, so nobody could see me. On my second year, my mom decided to tske me to the addiction center. I was there for about a month, then back home. I've started to play even more. At some point, I have hallucinations, twice. Probably because I was exhausted. At the end of my high school, I just somehow stopped playing  because I wanted to get my high school certificate.

I've cried of powerless, and exhaust many, many times. I really wanted to stop playing. But worst was ahead of me.

I got my high school certificate, and I wanted to go to the univeristy, and I did. In meanwhile, I was diagnosed with depression, and anxiety started to taking pills. I was going to university by train (it was taking about 5 hours daily to going to univeristy, and back home, and meanwhile wait for train for about an hour) I didn't have many friends. Just two. They were fascinated about stuff like D&amp;D. It was completely not my thing to do.  I wanted to go out, they didn't. I've left my univeristy, and for about a year I was doing nothing.

Then I decided to try once again, but this time I could spare some flat with friend. I've left my pills on my call, and then, I've was struggling with side effects but it was okayish.

Now, we are in present. I hate living with my friend, everything what I've dreamed about beeing in big city as a student, was nothing compared to reality. Now, I'm even more depressed, got more anxiety, I just lack of every skill than adult should have. I can't say no, I taking everything personally, and offending. And I really mean it, I can't see other way. Once again, I feel like completely disaster. Powerlesss disaster.