Things go great and then they turn to shit. I cannot bear this constant back and forth feeling. I want to be around people yet I want to be alone. I am tired of being abandoned and led astray. I want to kill myself but don't even have the mental capacity for it. I want to die without having to do it myself. What is there for life for me anyway? I don't care anymore. I want my suffering to end. I take my meds, I exercise, I eat properly, I meditate, I clean, I shower, I work a full time job, yet I feel nothing. I don't see the point of going through with life. I turned 25 and I don't care to get older. I'm tired of suffering constantly.