I feel awful for this, but I feel like I should write about it and maybe someone can help me out here. 
My bf and I have been together (on and off) for about 7 months now. In the beginning of our relationship, he broke up with me because I was kind of out of control (this was before I started to work on handling my BPD, so pretty understandable). I was so sad and torn up over the break up that I started talking to a few different guys so I wouldn’t think about him. Pretty soon I connected with this one guy, he was so gentle and sweet. He gave me a lot of attention and seemed genuinely excited about me and wanted to get to know me. We talked for a bit, maybe a week or so, but then my bf and I ended up getting back together. I never told this guy that I had gotten back with my ex, but he saw my snaps of us together and then we both kinda just stopped texting completely. This was months ago. I noticed a few weeks ago that he had unfollowed me on twitter and cried. I feel awful about what happened. I feel like he was probably hurt by me getting back with my current bf, I know he had wanted to go on a date with me. 
I still think about this guy sometimes. I’m not sure why really. I partly still feel guilt over what happened but also... I kind of miss talking to him and the connection we had. I am very much in love with my boyfriend but I feel like a reoccurring problem we have in our relationship is that I feel I don’t get the kind of attention/quality time with him that I need. It makes me feel unwanted sometimes. He is a good boyfriend, but of course my BPD makes me focus on any lack of attention I’m getting so I can convince myself that I’m being abandoned.
I don’t know, I feel like I just felt so secure talking to the other guy. As I said, he was very kind and patient with me, and very eager to talk with me and get to know me. He just acted excited about me in a way that my bf just.. doesn’t. I guess that’s what I miss. Is this wrong of me? 