This has been one of the worst weeks I’ve ever had.

The owners of the apt we rent choose to remodel my bathroom without discussing with us beforehand so we had to wake up at 7 am for 4 days straight and listening to the banging and shattering from 7 AM to 8 PM all those days. I have trouble sleeping for as long as I can remember and this definitely didn’t help for my overall mood.

Two days ago my dad told me that I was a failure since I took two years longer to graduate from university and I’ve haven’t started my masters degree and I’m currently unemployed because the agency I worked for had to close due to the pandemic and although I’ve had interviews and sent my CV everywhere since May last year there’s no job to be found for me. 

I’m very much broke and I have issues managing the little money I can get. I was going to start an up-cycled/thrifted clothing online store but the ruckus of how my place is made me unable to do anything but have a migraine all week. I’m also anxious about having to work through social media since social media makes me extremely unhappy.

And the last blow was delivered just now. My great uncle just came to bring something to my grandpa and told me straight to face “What’s the use of being so pretty if you haven’t been able to get married? Clock is ticking”. I did even responded because he’s just repeating what I’ve been feeling all week: That I am a failure. I failed as a profesional, as daughter and even as a woman. There’s nothing I have archived.