Sooo I work as a lifeguard and work at an indoor swimming pool during my time I’ve had multiple breakdowns and anxiety attacks where I was basically useless at work. I didn’t really have a choice but to come since I just started and had no benefit time to call off. After having so many instances and it getting really bad I decided to try and get help. I’m not on medications for anxiety and depression. 

For the summer I will be getting put at a beach. Now I hate the beach I did junior guards as a kid and I hated every second of it. I dislike running, swimming in the lake terrifies me, and I just feel like it’s less control when it comes to the general public. The beach I chose is small as I didn’t think I could handle any other beach in my city, but after meeting my captain it seems he’s a tough guy and expects a lot of the things that I worry I won’t be physically capable of doing. 

Now being obsessed how people perceive me and I’m going to give it my all so I don’t look dumb to everyone but I’ve also learned that I have limits and if I push them too far I’m going to have a breakdown. I’m just wondering if this is something I should express to my captain or if I should just try my best and hope that it doesn’t happen. I want to tell him so he isn’t surprised if something does happen but at the same time I don’t want him to already have a negative image of me. What should I do?