I have no idea what is happening to me, but what I'm feeling is absolute emptiness, and despair. I'm numb to everything I think. I hope this feeling ends soon, I've been this way for the past week, it's felt like years though and it's horrific. I'm so tired... So tired. I need a break. I want to sleep and have good dreams. I want to sit still and feel peace. I want to let go of the white hot emotions inside of me. I try and try to let go and to soothe myself, but to no avail. Time after time, the cycle repeats, and I end up in the same place. I don't know why I expect things to be different sometimes. Hope seems so stupid right now. I'm trying to have it, though. I'm so lonely. And being with people makes it worse. Even those who I think I care for. 

&amp;#x200B;

Just needed to say this. If anyone can send some words of love, it would help. Thanks for just reading if not.