I wish I could just work like 12 hours a day everyday because it keeps all the bad thoughts out of my head. The second I get home and try to relax all the depressing thoughts hit me like a train. At least at work my mind is occupied with work shit but once I get home I get so depressed and that always makes me wanna drink and now I’m starting to develop alcoholic tendencies. I know I shouldn’t drink because of my problems and I try to keep myself from doing it but I can’t always stop myself. Drinking doesn’t even help either if anything it just makes me more sad but I always feel the need to be drunk when I’m depressed. I just want all these thoughts to disappear or to be able to disappear to the mountains and never have to see anyone or any of my problems again.