The more I want to do something, the more I avoid it. If I do try to do something from this list, I somehow am extremely inefficient and make almost no progress. That then makes me put it off even more.

* I avoid educating myself on things like Covid &amp; all the major divisive topics (climate change, racism, etc.) 
* I feel uncomfortable doing *anything* with my down time. I would rather spend 5 hours on reddit than watch a movie or even open an online game. I have a very hard time liking new things because I'll focus on their flaws and that wrecks it for me. I see things black &amp; white, so not having fun means I've "wasted" time without getting something in return. And that feels *horrible*.
* Shopping is hard for me as I'm taller &amp; slimmer than average, so nothing fits. I want to buy clothes so I can exercise. But I can't bring myself to even go out to try, since it takes so long to find even 1 garment that's right, and I might not find anything at all. (Wasted time.)
* I don't make food unless it's instant because 30+ min feels like wasted time. Therefore I often have just 1 meal a day.
* I've also been having a hard time sleeping due to ruminating about life crap. Therefore I often bounce back &amp; forth between a decent sleep schedule &amp; ruining it.

I can easily help decide things for my mother, who has the same problem. But when it comes to doing things *I want to do,* I feel incompetent. Like no matter what I pick it'll be the wrong decision, because I don't know anything and everything I always do is wrong. Which isn't true, but, I also have a problem with people/family second guessing &amp; doubting me or not listening when I tell them somethings wrong.

I have almost no confidence in my ability to make decisions, when I lack information and don't know how to get it in a timely manner.