Whenever I think about my career, love life, my social life in general, I want to disappear. I want to cease to exist without hurting my loved ones. I guess it gets overwhelming. Like this huge wall that I have to climb but the more I look at it the more discouraged I feel. I don't want to do this anymore so I decided I would just stay where I am. Am I happy where I am? Sure, I have a place I can call my own, I have a car, (it's quite shitty but it gets me where I need to go) I have a decent job (janitor), my boss is good to me. I'm sure I get paid a little more than a janitor should be paid, at least that's it looks like. Do I want more out of life? Yeah, of course, I'm sure everyone does. No one likes feeling like shit. It's just too much for me. I want to quit and just disappear. I'm very tired, like I've been running on fumes. I'm definitely going to regret this part of my life once I get older, yet I still can't move knowing that. Life is what you make it though, I guess this is the life I made lol. God, I wish I could just disappear. It really is too much.