I started crying as soon as I opened my eyes. I couldn't sleep last night (even with psychiatric med), so you get up at 6am without absolutely nothing to do for the rest of the day. A friend was come see you but in the last moment you realize that you simply can't. You can't stop crying, you can't stop being angry, you can't stop feeling empty and not worth it in this miserable world. You just want to change your life, to make it better. To remind yourself why you fought so much to be where you are. Even if it's nowhere. Everybody moves on. And I'm stuck to my bed, crying without reason, being fully aware that you're never gonna meet your goals because you don't have them. You're gonna become something you hate: you're gonna be a mediocre person for the rest of your life.