From the age of 13 I was a heavy inhalant abuser ranging from petrol to butane lighter fluid and BBQ gas landed men hospital as a gas bottle burnt half my face when eyes only 14 two weeks before Christmas and I nearly died and had to get flown to a city Hospital and spent a whole week in ICU amd another in the burns ward where they had to cut the dead burnt skin from inside my mouth and was the loot that grew into my severe cptsd and I was a change demand since and developed bad Impulse and food problems and started smoking cigarettes, heavily as a scarred 14 year old and they helped me feel better.

I don't know if it was the fact that some Borderline go back to toxic relationships whether it be drugs or exes. I went back to chroming for the next nine years and it was always when I was severely depressed or if I experienced any very recent fights or if I got really bored as the hallucinations were always weird and scary but it was somehow very thrilling watching the hallucinations.

This year, 2022, I have earned my first BPD certificate for DBT, and have quit chroming completely as well as cough syrup and no suicide attempts, and my health is regaining gradually and it is the best thing I've ever achieved,  still maintain to my intelligence and motor skills and quit early enough to reverse the dangerous effects over the years from inhalants,  I just remind myself it's a self-harm tactic it's not gunna do nothing for me except put me in a wheelchair and it helps every time sorry about the long post but it is such an honourable achievement because creaming can be pretty freaking addictive when you're trying to impulsive substance use and severe addiction tendencies.

Still doing DBT works perfectly!