I’ve actually been improving a lot and had a great couple days this week, but now I’m spending the afternoon showing my apartment to potential new roommates and it’s fucking me up. I can’t help but feel they must be judging every flaw in my cleaning or how I organize the kitchen or the fact that my hair is too long or whatever. I’ve been dreading zoom calls with my interns for the same reason. I deleted a specific example because I’m worried about them seeing it but my brain keeps thinking about how all the interns must think I’m an idiot when I can’t answer their questions right away and probably regret working with us, and I’m feeling totally unjustified resentment of my supervisor for putting me in charge of them even though I know I should be happy about the chance and deep under my anxiety I do actually enjoy the mentorship aspect of my work. It’s just frustrating because I’ve been making a lot of progress with mindfulness and accepting my emotions and just working through them but today feels like a huge setback.