I'd say I haven't consistently enjoyed life since about a year ago. I've had suicidal thoughts a few times throughout. For a brief time, like a week ago until yesterday, I was actually happy. But that ended and now im left feeling worse than I did before that, to the point where I was seriously considering ending it last night. I also just generally dont like myself, whether thats physically, or personality wise. I currently have 1 real friend which Is more than enough for me but at the same time when theyre not able to talk life feels dreadful. Dont know if its hormones from puberty (im 13) but I dont have ambitions for anything and ive lost any interests i used to have. I know this is probably a bad way to judge but my school recently showed an assembly of signs of depression and suicide info and stuff and I felt like it was describing me, except the person was at least slightly social before they started being depressed. I have ADHD if that'd possibly correlate as well. Obviously none of you are psychologists, maybe this is just me venting, idk.