I have this chronic thing about it. Its like a trauma or something. Basically, I did something really stupid. I made someone very close to me my pillar. Nothing else was holding me up but them and when I lost them, everything just fell apart.

It's weird when you get fucked that hard because you just pick everything up and rebuild. You might think it's all impossible at first, that there's no way for you to build yourself back up but, in time, you just do.

Thing is, though, the pieces you were left with, well, they're incomplete. They took some of those pieces with them because its theirs after all. So you look for those pieces from other people, hobbies, work or anywhere else really but none of them really fit.

So now, you're desperate for them. You're going to look everywhere, cling to everything but this just makes you even more vulnerable.

Maybe not everyone can relate to this but to anyone whose going through it, know you aren't alone and that you'll get through it. The key is to not be so desperate about it, not to pursue it like your life depended on it. Meet people, try new things but let it all come naturally, don't force things.

To everyone who, like me in the past, have all their eggs in one basket, it wouldn't hurt to diversify a bit, my guy. Again, try new things and meet people, don't just be dependent on one thing or one person.

I don't even know if what I'm talking about makes sense but this loneliness, this emptiness, this void, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.