Schizoaffective (bipolar type) diagnosed with extreme anxiety/agoraphobia and some OCD in the mix for fun.

I have been seeing my therapist for 3 months. Since then my mental health has absolutely tanked. My therapist is, on a good day, somewhat helpful. On a bad day, condescending. She made fun of the fact that I struggled with disordered eating (said that she could never have an eating disorder and that she loves food too much) and then tried to tell me I was self diagnosing and I was dumb for doing that. 

She’s made fun of my agoraphobia (telling me I’m not agoraphobic I’m just insecure about my body and have social anxiety) and told me I’m not really schizophrenic. (I am diagnosed and medicated by a psychiatrist). 

I have since had to up my depression medication and I’m so stressed I fell into a manic episode 3 weeks ago. I have been struggling to go to appointments for my therapist and my case manager because of my depression. And they have done nothing but guilted me about it. They keep harassing me and shame me when I do finally show up.

I know it’s not just me because I always go to my psych appointment on time and have generally no issues, my psych is very kind, compassionate and is always patient with me. 

Mentally I’m really down today and I can’t handle it, I don’t want to get hospitalized because of MY OWN care team. 

On top of that I had an appointment today with my case manager and she just badgered at me about not answering her phone call earlier in the week (I was in class and I just forgotten to call her back), and when she asked me about how I was doing in school, and I told her I got a great score on my exam; she just used that opportunity to tell me about how good she was in the subject and how it would be easy for ANYONE. 

I feel like absolute trash, this has been so fucking awful. I regret doing this. I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to go to therapy anymore.

What do I do?