When the pandemic first started I was convinced that by this time of the year we'd either be in an apocalypse or it will all be over. My anxiety got so bad I had to use some natural rescue drops on top of the anti-anxiety meds I was already taking. I started actively preparing for the apocalypse. I read books on survival and started doing strength training at home. As time went on my fears ceased. Everything was going to be okay. It was crazy for me to even consider an apocalypse but now  I truly believe it's happening and I am scared because there is no way I would survive. I live in South Africa were the new strain was discovered a few days ago and I have very little trust in the government being able to do anything. My entire day has been one big panic attack and it's getting worse. I'm worried about my parents, my little sisters. I'm having difficulty breathing just thinking about it. My biggest fear is that they will all die and I will be left alone. I'm so fucking scared.