I really feel as if i only leave my house to go to work, my boyfriends house, or to go grocery shopping. 

When I was still a minor I was blessed because my family always took me on lots of vacations. Ive never left the country but Ive been to more states than most of the people I know. Most of my friends have only been to 5 or so. So I am grateful to have those experiences of course. Though I havent been on a vacation since then. Except a few months ago my parents wanted to go on a spur of the moment vacation, and I got to go. It was amazing, I was so happy, I missed it so much. 

As someone who has never moved, Its always been refreshing to go to another place. Ive been in the same state, same town, same house my entire life. A small town with absolutely nothing to do. So of course when I go on vacation and theres all these new things to do, I miss it the second I get home to the place ive lived forever.

Then for the past few weeks I have realized how routine and scheduled my life is. I wakeup, I goto work, I go to bed. Day in, day out. When I have free time, I do the same things, in my house, always. All the so called attractions in the towns over I have seen tens upon tens of times, theyre not a sight anymore. 

I dont even live in good driving distance of anywhere fun, so anywhere that would be a good place would be a long drive. And with these gas prices I cant really go on vacation anytime soon. So here I am stuck in the same monotonous life.

I want to clarify, as you read in the beginning, I am in a relationship. That and that only is my only joy. The only thing that feels like new (even though its not a new relationship) but I am well aware that you cant rely on a relationship to be the ONLY thing that makes you happy. 

And so, what else is there to make me happy? A new experience, except, I feel as though I have done everything in my vicinity, and I am starting to feel meaningless again. I just dont want to slip into a depression during the summer, thats when people are supposed to be happy. I want to do joyful things in my life, but how am I do to do that. 

Im tired of this repetitive cycle and I feel like I will never escape it.