This might be kind of niche. I used to practice journaling when I was younger (usually in a word doc) because I found it to be therapeutic. I also did some creative writing. Now, I struggle to record anything - either digitally or on paper (in something like a journal) - because I feel too anxious about other people finding it. Even if my concerns aren't plausible at all, it's still distressing to me. This has gone on for several years now. I feel like the only place my thoughts and feelings are truly safe is inside my own head. 

I feel like having some sort of outlet would really help me, but how can I find an outlet when nothing feels safe? A few years ago I started to really struggle with anxiety surrounding all things cyber-security related. Nowadays I only use open source software, encrypt all of my files, avoid all forms of social media, don't use google or google products, use a stripped down version of windows with telemetry blocked through my firewall, etc. - and it still doesn't feel like enough. I still feel very exposed. 

I used to struggle with feeling like I was somehow being watched/observed (even though I always knew that was ridiculous) and still do to some extent. Even the front facing camera on my phone is covered up. I feel like I can't achieve real privacy no matter how hard I try. I don't even like to think about things like my smartphone (where I have less granular control over settings) or the 'anonymous' accounts I use on reddit because the realization that those things probably aren't anonymous at all makes me feel sick. 

Does anyone else relate? I feel completely stuck. I need some sort of outlet but can't express myself properly when I constantly feel paranoid about being monitored or having my data snooped on somehow. It's exhausting.