i havent had a fp for a couple months because none of my friends really talk to me and i dont really talk to anyone and it s juist been killing me, when i dont have someones love i just feel cold and detached, i just want someone to love me, i want someone that i can talk to everyday and more than anything i want someone who actually cares about me. if i died right now nobody would notice a difference. i want to say im going to kill myself in 2019 but i say that every year and still am too much of a pussy. i hope i die soon, its too cold and lonely, im in so much mental pain and distress. my extremely happy mood swings have slowed down and are few and far between and ive been left in a slump of going from disassociation to suicidal depression. days feel like weeks but weeks feel like days. im scared.