I think I'm making progress towards detaching myself from my boyfriend. He's been my FP since we met and it has caused a lot of distress and just awful times for me. I realized tonight though that what I've been doing has worked and no longer has so much power over me. I forced myself to be apart from him, for multiple days by my own free will not just because i had to. before if i could be with him i would every second possible, and he let me since he also enjoys being together as much as possible. but it hasnt been healthy for me, at firstit was hard and I cried a lot when I left his side but now I can leave with ease, I don't stay by his side when it's inconvenient for me just because I feel like I need to. I also realized tonight that he hasn't been triggering me as much, I don't over analyze his every word and tone of voice, and if he upsets me I just walk away instead of clinging to his side and begging him not to leave. I'm starting to feel like my own person again and it feels so amazing. I was so scared that I'd ways have an unhealthy attachment to him. I believe he is still my FP,  but I think through the use of the skills I've learned over the years and ability to force myself to be apart from him has helped so so so much. I'm hoping this might be the start of peace in my relationship without the constant borderline habits and thoughts looming over me. 

I hope this isn't a fluke and I'm actually improving, I'm not stranger thinking I'm cured just to be suicidal the next day. but fingers are crossed that this is improvement nonetheless!