I'm spiralling right now because I couldn't keep working today. I started working a physically demanding full-time job as a bike courier a week ago.   
I've been doing fine up untill yesterday when my tailbone and knee started hurting making the work which was already physically heavy (but very fun and satisfying) to do. Today I had to walk up to my supervisor to tell him about it and he was very understanding and sent me home and told me to take it easy and let him know how i'll feel tomorrow so everything is alright on that side.   


BUT  


I've recently overcome addiction and have been on a positive trend and I've become very resolute about reinventing myself and up untill now things have been mostly good and this feels like major setback and I might have to find a different job which might be harder on me mentally since if it's in an office i'll just get burned out mentally or emotionally because i'll have to deal with my colleagues constantly or if it's from home i'll just get depressed being holed up and................  


I'm worried that this is where my positive sprint ends and I burn out again and go back to self harming  and considering what i've done to my close ones the past year due to addiction and attempting suicide i don't know

I'm scared