I am 19 years old. I’ve had a friend for 7 years. We didn’t talk consistently throughout this 7 years but when we did we would become close. We dated for 8 months and he broke up with me August 14th. It didn’t absolutely kill me because at least we were still friends right? Wrong. Last night I went out and sent him a text that said and I quote “whatever your loss because I am girlfriend,hookup, and wifey material and now you get none and I am fucking hot” immature very. I was drunk and texted him that to hype myself up. I usually try to compliment myself to make me feel better but I didn’t realize this would make him feel bad . I was an idiot and I lost my friend because of it. He is a very logical person but he unadded me from everything and blocked me from whatsapp and text. He has always been the balance I am loud and weird and spontaneous and he is logical and quiet and wonderful. No body who knew me understood our relationship but I adore him. Its been really hard and a lot of nonstop crying and I’ve only felt this once before. It hurts to know he knows me better than anyone in the world and he thinks I would say anything to try and hurt him. He always reassured me I wasnt an awful person but after last night it seems that changed entirely. The worst thing isn’t the pain I feel. Its knowing he’s hurting right now because of something I said