I have a friend ( call him J ) who's cancer patient and he doesn't have much time left. He wants to live desperately and here I am completely healthy (physically) , loving family and yet I want to die, I see no purpose in my life. I've never known what depression is until I came abroad for studies . I am fuckin coward to end it all. If some day death would come to my door and say it's the time, I'll happily go. I just wish I close my eyes and die in my sleep of heart attack.
I wish I could trade my life with my friend J.