İ had many health problems since i was a kid. They slowly ate away at me. İ was the best in class in school and got a degree in my country as the best result of an exam. İn 6. Grade a problem occured in my lung. İ was in hospital and was happy that i was finally going to die and this suffering was going to end.
İ managed to live but it was worse than dying. My life is just a torture that i want it to end as soon as possible. My succes in school faded away due to my health problems. My name came from being the top student to a lazy  student. My family says that i have a great life but i dont think that i will ever be happy as the others because of all the things i cant change.
İ was just a burden for everyone including myself for my whole life.

İ am no use to this world just like how this world is no use to me.
Killing myself is just a win/win situation for everyone.

İ dont know what to do other than committing suicide.

Any advice would help. Thank you...