I know this should be a sad post but I’m actually really happy. I’m gonna be done with it all soon.
Ever since my wife passed I have been determined to see her again. I’m done waiting. Life isn’t worth living without her.
It’s been 8 years. I am 34 now. 
I don’t even consider myself a widower When people ask I just say “I’m married”
I consider myself married. I actually get really mad when someone says I’m not married. I’ve never taken my wedding ring off. On her death bed she took hers off and put it on my pinky. That was 8 years ago. I haven’t touched it since, so I actually wear 2 wedding rings. She was just too young. She was 25 years old. I don’t work anymore. For the last 8 years I just sit at home. Sometimes I talk to her ashes. Sometimes I forget she’s gone. Like still to this day I’ll call her and ask her if she’s at the store or something because she isn’t home and then it just hits me like a train. 
I cry a lot to. Still 8 years later. Everyone said I’d “move on” I never have and I never will. Today feels like the day she passed. Sometimes I cry so badly I’ll slam my hands and my head against the table and because of this I actually broke it. This was a few years ago. But I’m happy because soon I won’t cry anymore I’ll be with her again. I’ll be with her for eternity and I’ll be able to tell her how much I missed her and all she missed. I’m actually excited for some reason.
Well that’s all.