I feel like I am dying and I dont deserve to live. Nothing is going right. I m trying my best to give 100% . I dont have a good job I have nothing in life . My parents hate me for being unsuccessful

I have no friend. I am in a new city. I cant talk to anyone, what should I do. I cant afford therapy. I feel like self harming. I want to not exist. I just need a hug and someone to believe in me. I have depression anxiety bulimia body dysmorphia and some new things. I am giving my best. But nothing seems to be enough. Is there anyone on earth who understnads what I feel. I am loosing everything