I thought I had my anxiety pretty well under control but this event made me realize how far I still have to go.  This was a special moment that I didn't want to ruin because of my anxiety. I had to take steps back and not make this about myself.  I've realized how selfish someone with anxiety can be but at the same time how important support is . I spent 3 days in the hospital with my wife and new born and the hole time my anxiety was through the roof.  I kept feeling light headed , nervous , sweaty , agitated.... But I kept it together. Never once did I say I couldn't do something because of my anxiety when in reality all I wanted to do was lock my self in a closed room and wait till it was time to leave.  I'm kinda proud of myself but also disappointed I couldn't enjoy it. Don't get me wrong, the joy I felt when he was born was special but all the moments surrounded by that one moment was torture.   I haven't told my wife any of it because it wasn't something she needed to be concerned with but they're were several times I thought I was blacking out....  All the nurses and doctors constantly coming and checking just gave me no relief for me to relax ..... I'm so glad we're home now but I just needed to vent my experience..... Hospitals are the worst