All I wanna do is go to sleep and my heart is maintaining that pace that I get right before a panic attack. I am not feeling down or anything but it feels like my body is crying for help and i wanna cry with it but i gotta go to sleep and i already had my crying session today. I feel alot of discomfort and do not want to have a repeat of two nights ago but i know itll happen. Lately I’ve felt like i started catching up with myself after ignoring my needs for so long and its been overwhelming and causing my anxiety to skyrocket. I try to let it out so i can process and let it go but i feel like im taking care of a baby who wakes up at 4am at night crying for something and sometimes i just don’t know what it is so i keep crying cuz lifes just scary sometimes. ik i mean well but i think i can be alot to handle at times the more i get to know myself. Not enough to make me wanna disappear but that little annoyance that pushes u to the edge. idk how to explain it. its helped typing this out. im gonna try to sleep now