I'm 23M from Pakistan and have severe depression, and I wish there was a time machine I could use to go back in time and find myself and give lots of hugs and kisses and just be there for myself when I had nobody, I've been alone all of my life, never had anyone by my side I don't remember if I ever had enjoyed life. 
I am still young, but at this point, I just wanna give up on everything. I just had this feeling if I go back in time and find my younger self, my younger self will say 
          "the future hasn't been kind to you, right?"

And I'm fearful that this sentence will destroy all of my hope to come back in time
 
I have helped lots of people but nobody has ever helped me back. 

I just feel so lonely and used. 

I have tried lots of attempts but failed all of them, I have sleeping pills. I just wanna take them.. But I dont wanna hurt my mother, but I dont wanna suffer anymore. It just hurt so badly. 

I need some love. 
I need somebody.