2 days ago, I split on one of my closest friends after they mildly offended me. they know i have bpd btw.

i told them i wanted to leave our whole friend group because i felt unwanted. i told them i felt like they didnt care about me and that we hadnt been friends for a while. they told me it was true, that i was overreacting and creating drama where there was none. i told them ive always had these thoughts and that nobody could convince me otherwise. they said that was my fault. we've been having semi frequent arguments for a while but they said this time i really crossed the line. they said they must mean nothing to me if i really want to leave them like this. i apologised to them and they forgave me but ive been too ashamed to speak to them ever since. 

i just want to delete all my social media and block all of them because im just so embarrassed of myself. i always manage to push away every single friend ive ever had. im so tired of it and i dont know what to do anymore. i really dont want to lose them but it seems ive done it again.