I just don't know what's happening anymore.
I recently texted with my ex girlfriend again, we were together 2 times already. The first time we broke up cause I wasn't doing great and had to go to a mental hospital. After that, I was doing a lot better and she (she also has mental problems) was also doing better. So we decided to try again. And the first 4 months it worked incredibly well. Suddenly everything went downhill again. And then, at the ending of March this year we split up. Now, a few days ago we texted again (she wished me a happy birthday) and then she told me she still hates that ws broke up. And that she hopes that we can maybe try again in the future.
And somehow it's still the same for me. I feel like I can't let her go, and I know it may sound stupid but I feel like she's my soul mate or idk call me crazy, I feel such a deep connection to her. But we can't be together right now, because she and myself too, have to work on a lot of stuff, on ourselves.
I'm getting tired of life. I just really want a person that feels like home and I want to love and be loved.
I'm really walking towards an edge again. I hate all of this.