I know it really depends on person to person but i was thinking, maybe some are better for certain sorts of depression. 

  


I'm 21 years old and i believe i'm transgender. Due to this i've repressed a lot of emotions my entire life and started feeling dissociated from a young age. At first when i was 12, it started with a lot of anxiety. Not being able to breath in fully, thinking i was gonna pass out, scared i'm gonna have a heart attack, ...  


Depression and anxiety do run in the family and my dad has had a lot of experience with psychotherapy and anti depressants + xanax. And like him, i don't really have a healthy way of dealing with difficult emotions and just hold them deep inside. 

At a certain point in my life when i got a little older and more control i started finding coping mechanisms. It started with gaming a lot and went on to smoking weed everyday. Everytime i stopped smoking weed i got those panic attacks again. 

Things progress a little more and in the last couple of years, even though i still smoke i have enough coping mechanisms to not have anxiety because i escape from the world everyday. I watch netflix and sit behind my PC even though i'm in uni. I fail a lot of classes but i'm good at what i do so i kind of manage even though if i don't do something i will fail eventually.

&amp;#x200B;

The point is, i'm really dissociated and numb. I don't feel much at all and at this point i'm just depressed. I can't take care of myself which i have too because I'm alone most of the time. I can't get out of bed early and miss school by oversleeping. I go to bed at 5am to escape into the night. I smoke weed every evening to escape even more. 

&amp;#x200B;

I feel like i should take an anti depressant that also works for anxiety but i don't feel any anxiety currently because i'm not in the battle of life at the moment. 

Any reccomendations or is it just not possible to say?