Hey. Me again. I'm sorry I come around with bad news so often. I don't like being negative in public spaces, but sometimes I only have one place to go. Sorry.

I believe that I am a great criminal infused with the essence of history's greatest monsters. I believe that my blood is dirty, that my spirit was crafted by the darkest demons from the furthest depths of reality. I believe that I will cause great calamities to the world and my mere existence will destroy humanity. I believe that my soul is evil and that is why I suffer, because god has singled me out as a antichrist of sorts.

I tried to do better, you know? I turned vegan cause I didn't want to hurt animals. I adopted cats from the humane society because I wanted to take care of them. I built an electric bike to get around without using gas. I took the medicines they said would heal me. But what does it all matter? I'm the root of evil, my mere existence is bringing humanity to an end, I'm the reason wars break out and hunger ravages the earth.

I know no one else believes this. I know my family loves me, and doesn't understand why I struggle to eat and clothe myself, why I stare at the news all day and blame myself for every single thing that happens. I know nobody understands that I am evil. I know nobody knows why I break down sobbing every time there's a fatal car crash, or outbreak of covid, or murder on tv. But that just makes me afraid of what they'll think when they find out what I am.

I know you don't believe me either. I know this sub has a rule against encouraging delusions, I know somebody will probably report my account to get a bot to check in on me. That's okay. I just wanted to share somewhere that might understand.