I posted this here because I had no one else to share my feelings with so I guess it makes me feel better to share them here even if it's gonna get downvoted.

I've been trying to make friends for years. I've always been the one who approaches first. The one who asks and cares about the other but NOTHING literally nothing comes out of it. People simply never care or show the slightest bit of interest in me and just talk to me when they need something.

This has been going through middle and high school and now in college as well even though I tried meeting so many people and I pushed myself to be as social as I can but everything is still the same.

Before you tell me that I need to WAIT or CHANGE myself I will tell you that I had enough negative thoughts in my head about these two things so I don't care anymore.

I just don't understand. I help people, I'm nice and caring and I receive compliments from everyone but when it comes to anything concerning friendship it never happens and even that introverted guy in my classroom got friends without doing even half of what I'm doing.

This is it. It's over. I'm not putting myself in this pain anymore. I'm ending my search for friendship and I will accept being alone instead of ruining my dignity with giving attention to people who won't give it back. Even if someone approaches me after this decision I'm rejecting them. I'm not fate's toy where it gives me what I want after all the pain I felt.

I wanted friendship because I thought it would make me happy but I was very wrong. This made me more miserable than being alone and I finally feel comfortable with my decision.