a little rant!!

well just looking at my reflection in general whenever i feel depressed or anxious. i feel like i would hate myself more whenever i would look at myself in such a state of self loathing and sadness. in some cases that i do see myself, i even gag and want to throw up. it sounds really jokey but thats genuinely how i feel. i dont know if its body image issues or because i just hate existing at that moment but i just really cant look at myself.

ive been feeling this maybe 2 or 3 days every 2 weeks since summer began. i don't know if this is just stress talking or something else. but i feel like utter shit sometimes and i just cant help but cry to myself. i just lost appetite suddenly and im scared to do schoolwork today. ive noticed that whenever these instances happen to me, everything just seem so gray and quiet all of a sudden and i hate it.

i dont really know where else i could talk about this so ill just be posting it here