Before anyone thinks, no I’m not currently suicidal. I have no plans to harm or kill myself. But I always have this thought in my head. I really don’t think I was cut out to be like, a person. It sounds weird but I don’t feel like I’ll ever truly belong anywhere. The things that have happened to me and the way that I think doesn’t fit in anywhere with other people. The way this world is, it’s disgusting. It’s cruel and disgusting. I always find myself looking around outside and not even feeling like a person. I feel like I was supposed to be somewhere else. Something else. I always picture myself in a field of those yellow rapeseed flowers with no one around. Just sun, peace, and happiness. Whenever I think of something like that I feel like that’s where I belong. Because that in my head isn’t what I call earth. It’s something different. I just don’t understand how we are supposed to conform to this thing called life and act like we love it when in reality I don’t feel like I have a place in anyone or anything’s life on this earth. This probably doesn’t make sense but I’m here someone will understand what I’m trying to say lol. Just a thought.