Not sure where the best place to post this is so if it should go elsewhere let me know

As a bit of backstory, I (20 f) was in therapy on and off for the majority of my teenage years and haven’t gone back since I aged out of the children’s mental health system. Where I live mental health is very underfunded so it can be hard to get in unless you have the money for a private therapist which is an issue of its own, year long wait times and overworked social workers make a lot of people reluctant to try getting help. Since last going to therapy I had a child and my issues haven’t affected me raising him other than being more stressed sometimes, but I have plenty of family support to help when I do need breaks. 

I had never really considered that anything bad could come from going to therapy as a mother and I was even planning to go back as soon as I could until all this happened to my partner. While doing his initial interview with his worker he had admitted that being a new parent had been overwhelming for him and he was very stressed about it. They told him at the time those feelings were normal and that together they could work on coping skills. At the end of their session though he was told that cps would be coming to our house because he felt that way.

He called me immediately and we were both panicked and confused about why this was happening. They came the next day and basically told us because of his stress he shouldn’t be alone with a child and I should always supervise. Of course this was very confusing for both of us as everything had been totally fine and my partner was always a great parent. 

During their next session he told his worker that he wouldn’t be coming back because he couldn’t trust them and he wouldn’t be able to open up to them again after all that. The worker told him that if he didn’t keep coming to the sessions that they would call cps again and he would probably not get to see our child again. He has been essentially held hostage like this for months all the while dealing with his issues himself because he has no support now.

Since then my plans to go to therapy have halted and I’ve been terrified to go anywhere for support. Even though my issues have never affected my parenting ability they can be very difficult to deal with (ptsd, anxiety, I believe repressed trauma as well). I was really relying on getting help so I can learn coping strategies since for the past few months a lot of triggers + my abuser have been unavoidable. This has been wearing down on me every day and it feels like I’ll never be able to have both the help I need and my child in my life. 

Is there any way to anonymously receive treatment while still talking to the same person so you can get the personalized support you’d get from regular therapy? I don’t have much money for it but I could figure something out if I had to. I don’t know if calling helplines would really help for ongoing support since having to explain traumatic events to strangers over and over again would just cause me more stress.