I always forget that I’m bipolar and think I’m cured until the depression hits. I struggle mainly with depressive episodes. I’m used to quick mood swings due to the BPD, but it feels like when I’m in a depressive episode they’re every 10 seconds. They become so rapid and my thoughts are moving so quickly. I feel completely overwhelmed and like I can’t do anything but sit there and try to sleep. I just get the constant urge to unalive myself like multiple times each minute because of how quick it becomes. 

If anyone could help me with advice during this time I’d be grateful. Any tips to manage would be nice. I’m currently unmedicated and have a psychiatry appointment soon but until then it’s hard to make it through each day.