I have a huge issue with abandonment with people I’m trying to get into a relationship with. It usually drives them away. This lady that I’m friends with though, I feel like my abandonment is going into overdrive. If I don’t hear from her for a few hours or if I can’t see her, it sends me into a panic attack. I’ll be crying, heart racing, and I’ll bomb her with texts. She knows about my abandonment issue and somehow hasn’t ran off yet but I wonder how long before she does.  

This is the hardest thing I struggle with in BPD. I’ve never had a relationship in my life and anytime I can smell one, I unintentionally torpedo it.