I hate therapy.  

I've been in and out of offices and sat on many different couches since I was 12.  Sometimes it was a religion-based counselor, sometimes psychiatrist, sometimes it was a 'life coach' type.  Not once did I feel like any of it helped.  

Reliving the verbal, emotional, sexual, and physical abuse over and over again just reopens old wounds, and the older I get, the more I just want to forget.

But somewhere deep inside of me, I don't think I deserve happiness, so I keep living my life in misery.  My relationship is horrible, yet I stay, because I feel like I deserve it.    

So I'm forcing myself to go back and sit on yet another couch.  

Maybe 20,000th time's a charm.