I’m in university and honestly it’s been a struggle to manage but I still really try even though sometimes depressive episodes get in the way. It makes me feel like my efforts aren’t enough and it’s hard when I’m proud of myself for doing something small that was hard for me and then someone comes along and belittles it. I guess that’s just apart of the culture of university that everyone has to be doing so much to be considered worthy or valid. I’ve only missed one lecture this entire term and yesterday I woke up feeling really upset for just being alive and all I wanted to do was stay in bed and skip my lecture but I still went but I was ten minutes late and the lecturer called me out for it in front of everyone. And today I slept through my lecture but I figured I’d at least work on my essays that I need to get done and then my boyfriend shamed me for not going and I told him that nagging wasn’t going to help the situation and if he was going to make any remarks they should be encouraging ones. But it’s just frustrating because I feel like no one gets how hard it is or appreciates how hard I’m trying.