Ive been going through a lot of painful experiences lately and plan to go to therapy soon. But i am scared that ill fail or recovery wont be like i imagine it to be.

When i fall in love with someone the feelings are very intense and i hyperfocus on that person, which is normal for BPD. The thing that always hurts me the most though is that i lose my feelings once they leave or ignore me for longer than 2 days. That process is extremely painful for me and i get very depressed if i try to keep that bond up. Its almost impossible for me to not forget my feelings. And its indefinitely harder to try and recover that bond and my lost love afterwards. I get the urge, and could just move on and find someone new. But thats absolutely not what i want. I want a stable relationship in my life and not lose my love for someone. Thats why, along with developing a proper sense of self, this is the biggest problem i want to fix in therapy.

So ive been wondering if the people who are considered to be in remission have learned to have emotional permanence/object constancy. 
Have you learned to keep your feelings and bonds stable even if your SO is not around for a few days? Are you able to keep your personality and dont feel like something is missing from you or constantly changing?