I’m currently going through a tough time emotionally because I found out my boyfriend had been seeking attention from other women. My trust in him has visibly been damaged and I notice myself behaving different towards him but I can’t help it. It also feels like I’m constantly splitting when I’m around him, one moment I show my real emotions the other moment I play pretend, I trust him, I fear him, I care about him then I don’t care about him. 

Yesterday we were smoking a joint outside and I was in my “nice” personality. We talked and something must’ve triggered me because I split. You cannot visibly tell when I split but you can hear it in the tone of my voice and the way that I act. it goes from caring to indifferent and vice versa. Then we went to the store and after I asked him if he had weed on him and wanted to smoke. He told me he obviously had weed on him because we smoked not too long ago. I couldn’t recall or believe that until he explained where we smoked and what we were doing. Has anyone else ever experienced something like this?