My mom got really sad out of the blue one day and said “you’re my favorite person, you know that?” I have always struggled with my feelings of inadequacy and I am almost certain my mom said that to try and help, but it terrified me. Two-ish months later I had a mental breakdown and tried to kill myself twice. I was in and out of the mental hospital for over a month. My mom was broken from this. She screamed at me and even slapped me. The amount of times I walked out of my room covered in my own blood just for her to drive me to the hospital. It was too much. I saw my dad sobbing. Even now half a year later I am still making the ones I love miserable. I am sick, so sick I can’t function anymore. I am worthless and selfish, as well as unable to change. I want this to end.