

So, I just thought about something. The last 3 years have kind of sucked. 

In march 2020 my grandpa passed away. Heart attack. We weren’t close but we were family. Talked on holidays and told each other happy birthday, that kinda thing. I’d go over there every once and awhile just to say hi. Anyways, it was sudden and it hurt but it hurt my dad worst of all. He just gave up. Didn’t care about life anymore. Ended up smoking himself to death since he had severe lung problems already. 11 months after grandpa… dads gone. I still miss him everyday. And it still hurts. I never really dealt with the fact that he was gone which is how I ended up shutting everyone out, even my wife. All I did was play video games just to escape the reality that I felt I wasn’t important and didn’t matter. Knowing that my dad had passed away. Fast forward 13 months later, I’m getting divorced. I didn’t mean to push anyone away. I never wanted it to be like this. I didn’t want to bother her with my problems. I didnt want to bother anyone and I don’t wanna be a bitch about this but guys, I’m kinda losing it over here. I can’t think straight. They say take it day by day but I feel like every minute is a new challenge. Had to share. Get it off my chest. Tell someone.