Hi everyone. I've suffered with anxiety for as long as I remember. I tried to get treatment once as a teenager and had a bad experience with the medication prescribed and the doctor was terrible. I dealt with it on my own for several years and recently decided to try again. I love my new psychiatrist and she is very helpful but I still feel like something is wrong and I don't know how to go about fixing it. I CONSTANTLY overthink. Most of my thoughts are not negative, in fact I usually force myself to be overly optimistic in order to compensate so I don't spiral. I am always thinking of the next task to be done. I need to do the dishes, the laundry, call my insurance, exercise 3 times a week, meal prep, care for my toddler. If everything is not 100% completed I have no peace. The only time I get any relief is when I'm drinking or smoking. I don't want to resort to self medication and I feel like a bad mom. Does this ever get better? Whenever I try to be "mindful" I just overthink that too and my thoughts derail back to whatever task has to be done next.