Every time I try to exercise, I become extremely aware of all the aches and pains and tingles in my body and without fail I have a panic attack. I was a highly trained dancer all my life and I miss having the freedom allotted with physical strength and flexibility. The last time I actually tried to do something fun was a few years ago when I was taking aerial lessons, but I couldn’t even get out of the parking lot towards the end because I was sobbing from fear.

i hate this sedentary lifestyle. I hate not feeling like myself because I get winded walking up long staircases. I hate not being able to exercise because when I feel a single tingle my brain says “your neck is broken and you’re going to die.” I‘m working with my therapist to overcome this, but it’s hard to feel strong enough to overcome something like this.