I try and kill myself, I get treated like absolute SHIT in the psyche ward, then tossed back in the world with my mental health even worse than before, I try and get a therapist, literally none are taking new clients in my state, I try and get medication, I get such a bad allergic reaction that I need change of meds but when I call to make an appointment to schedule, they tell me I have to wait until my scheduled appointment that was made.
I give up on everything. On getting better, on getting therapy and meds, I give up. You win society, u fucking win. I'm just going to let myself reach crisis point and then get my dosage correct that I should've the 1st time and finish what I started.