Hey, 19(m) here. I guess I'll just jump right in and say that I have some strong apathy that's been happening for quite some time now, but I'm pretty sure the worst of it started around two years ago. I already know I have dysthymia as it's my only diagnosis in the mental health regard (I'm also autistic and have POTS, but those are unrelated) and I don't suspect anything else, but then again this isn't a diagnosis post, but simply a call for help. 

So here's my dilemma. I feel almost nothing, but what I do feel is concern for others, random and infrequent spurts of sorrow, and semi frequent but nonetheless random bursts of internal anger. Other than that the only other times I've actually felt something at all were relief when I graduated high school and temporary joy when I discovered what I thought I wanted to do.

Now, I can't handle this anymore. To be clear, I have no thoughts of self-harm and do not consider the permanent solution to be a good idea. But I want to live again. I don't enjoy anything; I'm distracted at best. I have nothing to look forward to and can't remember anything to look back on. I draw no comfort from anything and don't find the need to be comforted. I'm just kind of drifting and I want that to stop. Or at least I want to want it to stop.

Please, is there anything I can do? And please don't suggest medication, as I have always had bad experiences with it. Doctors haven't found anything to help me yet.