Hey so ah........
The awesome awkward employees at work suggested I stop venting on the clock and ask you people what's up. So I uh...we uh broke up. Well, he left me and its really hard stomaching or trying to stomach that maybe you're the problem? You're damned and condemned to everlasting confusing relationships?
I was diagnosed with BPD at 16 and before that other people had this outlook of me. Being ahead of the class but somehow a successful misfit because I didnt really care much about anything. Most times I felt therapists spouted a crock of shit about me and what bpd is because it's so spread thin in meaning 
Freddy - A 25 year old brooding alcoholic 
Shawna - A 25 year old ex rave kid with "anger problems"
We met on okcupid and both came out of intense relationships. We hit it off great and we really seemed to compliment eachother. The sex was fucking bomb..He was in AA for a long while...until he met me. He convinced me that he could drink moderately and I blamed myself for having habits and throwing it in his face but I complied..over time whenever we drank together we always ended up in a huge fight or petty split. Very hurtful. Curses and "You're unlovable" this "You're worthless" that. On Christmas eve we drank together and I got blackout drunk and we had a fight, I trashed his apartment, pushed him several times and got in an uber home. He drank 48 beers that day....I understand our damages are a horrible mix but..
Does anyone have a relation to this? In a relationship where one has bpd and the other is an alcoholic because everyone I tell this to just says it's all his fault..when I know I can be difficult.  How did it end up for you?