I get this feeling most people have built in emotional dimmer switches.... and not saying that people can decide how intensely they feel... but more like they have a range that goes smoothly from 'not bothered' to 'extremely ruffled' and it lands somewhere on that scale depending on situation... I on the other hand have just got both extreme ends and appearing normal is like playing with a light switch to get it to balance in the middle... not quite how it works. 

Like I cope fine... I can be extremely anxious or upset and carry on with my day, but I wonder if I make it out to be worse than it is, or I genuinely don't react mildly to things that emotionally trigger me.  

I also get this feeling it affects how I feel towards people... if I'm not feeling extremely happy or extremely affectionate I sometimes wonder if I feel for them at all. And that's scary. I rationalise I can't feel extremely affectionate all the time but my way of attaching emotions to people feels warped because of the extremes being so odd.... like craving a bad relationship because the highs are so high and you know  for certain when it's bad, there's no middle ground where it's just 'ok'. I get this could be linked to not so favourable memories... but still it's like something is missing. 

Anyone feel this way? 