I relapsed on Saturday march 5 and continued on until last night…almost a solid week. Today I’m admitting myself into a mental health care facility for addiction and thoughts of suicide. I feel worthless right now. I don’t deserve anything. I feel shame. After so many years of working hard and staying out of trouble…I did it again. I realize that I truly am a masochist for apparently liking the torture and pain and anguish. I think of what type of garbage person puts their loved ones in jeopardy, what kind of awful bitch cheats on her loving boyfriend. Apparently me. I am truly a bad person.