I feel like I’m not in control but my body wants me to be mad. And sad. And sad that I’m mad. I feel like I’m being replaced times 1000 because now the other sister in law is pregnant and I’m happy for her, but now the other pregnant in law and their significant others can ostracize me more and leave me out of everything. The call it “the Original 5” the four of them plus my fiancé....but no me...
They never ask me about my life, about our wedding next August... no one wants to know me..so I just stay quiet, chime in maybe, fake laugh... it’s a literal mask
They don’t know how I feel. I just hide it all. 
I know I’m all messed up. It’s obvious I have problems. Maybe it’s why I’m left out ugggh I’m so confused 