Summer has always been the season during which my anxiety peaks. To a student, summer is inevitably filled with anxiety-provoking free time even though I try to make it as busy as I could (gym, job training, research, etc.) and as someone who doesn't have lots of friends, I can't cling to the few good friends of mine all day to alleviate stress. Whatever I try focusing on doing, I get this constant anxiety of something bad is going to happen and I sweat because of that in addition to the fucking heat. Also having more than 12 hours of sunlight is absolutely the worst because it gives me the feeling of timelessness which is a nightmare for free-time anxiety and OCD.

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It also makes me irritable at pretty much everything that disturbs me by even the slightest bit. I fucking hate being sticky all the time. I fucking hate seeing people posting about their fancy summer vacations; I fucking hate the bugs; I fucking hate calling my parents because most of the time the conversation ends up in a toxic and argumentative way; I fucking hate the wind that fucks up my hair; I fucking hate the stink on the city streets; I fucking hate the noises the machinery makes early in the morning; I fucking hate this summer especially because it's in the way of me returning to in-person schooling. 

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I feel like this is driving me crazy. I just wanted to be heard and therefore any advice or input will be appreciated.