idk im normally really socially anxious and depressed which makes me quiet and awkward when around people. sometimes though, if i end up having a good convo or someone seems to actually enjoy talking to me ill become a completely different person. my mood becomes wayyy happier, ill be way more talkative and care less about my mistakes, it feels like a genuine break from depression and anxiety. 

the thing is I can only get this way if other people start convos with me and start everything. i cant ever be happy on my own or be the start to good convos/moments. I always depend on other people to give me confidence and make me less awkward in public if that makes sense.

how do i learn to be happy on my own and not depend on other people