I wish I didn't exist, but
I wish I wasn't merely existing

I wish I wasn't failing in life, in school
I wish my room wasn't a mess
I wish my life wasn't at a stand still

I wish I could pick up a book,
I wish I cared enough, but
I wish I wouldn't care what others thought about me.


I wish I could cry,
I wish I could break down and talk to somebody, but
I wish no one saw me as anything but strong

I wish I could sleep,
I wish I wasn't waking up late

I wish I knew if I was just being 'lazy',
I wish there was actually an explanation for the melancholy and lethargy I feel

I wish I wasn't just a leech to my friends,
I wish I could actually treat them not just suck

I wish I had the guts to let go of the weight of living,
I wish I had the guts to hold on tightly....