i know dbt is the long term answer. ive been thru so many outpatient  programs, inpatient stays, crisis centers, individual therapy, many many psychiatrists who have literally all misdiagnosed me, misguided me, and disrespected my whole situation. its hard to trust the system after that. now im angry. now im watching ways to hurt others and learning how to used knives (obvi cant get access to a firearm anytime soon bc 5150s). God someone stop me before im dead or someone else is. idk if this is even ok to post, im just laying it all out for yall.