I’m currently in the Navy and my service ends in April next year(Singaporean males have to serve a compulsory 2 years of National Service).

I went to a mental health institution for therapy when I was younger and plan to go back for reevaluation next year while my medical bills are covered. I just want to know what other people’s experiences were like and maybe prepare myself.

As for why I want to be diagnosed?

I was diagnosed with adjustive disorder when I was 17. I was depressed after losing friends but looking back I wonder if I’m bipolar. Before I lost my friends, I was honestly a real narcissist and ego maniac with poor social interactions with people.

At the time, I connected it to being bullied a lot when I was younger but I realised that I’ve had poor social interactions at times and also episodes of anger and obsession over different things as well as periods of depression.

I remember pretty much sleeping most of the time in class, listening to music as an escape and as I got older, I would even sometimes leave in the middle of class to hide in the toilet for awhile.

There were times where I just had these outbursts and moments of anger. I’ve had lots of confrontations but also moments where I can’t really explain why I did certain things.

Honestly, the main reason is that I must admit that I’ve been stalking my ex on social media. I realise that I’m a piece of shit for doing this. In my ex’s own words, everything was fine but I became a complete maniac after we broke up. It just reminded me of when everyone was leaving me and I didn’t understand why it was happening again. I realise that I have a problem with stopping myself from going overboard and I need help.

I plan to go to university so I hope that if I can find help to fix myself before I move on to the next chapter of my life.