I am tempted to take myself out by standing in front of a train some parts of me demand vengeance and to go on a homicidal excursion to torture and slowly kill someone to inflict externally what turmoil I feel inside I'm a villain and a piece of shit I get that for feeling this way I know that I am entitled and honestly keep looking for a way to end it all whether my life is needed to be ended just to end the torment or to go comatose or somehow find someone who can fo hypnotherapy and let me vent it out or uncover the roots I may have missed or solve it I'm tired of having to write these extreme words, driving everyone away just to calm down or dispel it so you can go ahead and be disgusted or hate me, ridicule me insult me. The amount of anger and conflict will pale in comparison to it