Here to vent and hope others can give me advice or just hear that there are people with similar anxiety.

The whole day I feel fine, no issues with sounds or people around me. Until the sun goes down and it gets ‘quiet’. The silence is just fucking loud, I hear every creak or even the slightest sounds from my neighbors. It drives me insane. I am literally ALWAYS scared that maybe my neighbors have a party at night, or just visitors and that I won’t have a good night. Even though the apartments are pretty isolated and I never experienced noise disturbance at night. I did in my old appartement tho. The air ventilation is always on here and my brain makes me think as if the noise of the ventilation is a bass or music from the neighbors. I even sometimes listen to my ventilation grid to make sure its the ventilation. I just want to relax and enjoy my evening without being so overly anxious. If I hear a little noise, like a door, my body gets this shock feeling and as if blood rushes through my brains and I need to make sure there is nothing going on. It’s as if my ears turn to hypersensitive and I hear literally everything and my brain and body goes into panic mode when I hear something, like a damn animal in the wild.

I started using melatonine 3mcg since october and it works for my sleep because I have I am having lots of trouble falling asleep. My anxiety keeps me awake. I used temazepam and oxazepam for sleeping before, but my doctor doesn’t want to give more because its addictive. Sometimes I use 5mcg Melatonine but i don’t know if its bad for me to up my dose. I just don’t know what to do, I just wish there was a pill that could make me feel good and not anxious. I hate noise canceling earbuds because it makes me even more anxious that I can’t hear whats going on around me.