I'm 19F and I feel like everything good in my life has been taken from me. I will also note I have both Autism and ADHD.

It started at the end of my Exams, during the pandemic. The last few months I fell into a depressive state and barely passed, which meant I couldn't get into university. That was a year or two ago but it has meant I have next to no friends, the friends I do have are either internet ones, or they live on the opposite side of the country. I don't have any way of making friends near me close to my age.

I've been stuck with my overbearing mother that critisises every thing I'm not doing, I am scared to even leave my room with her in the house as I do not wish to be told off for an absurd reason again (She has yelled at me for going to sleep at 8pm before) I do not like being yelled at, she does this often, she also gets drunk often and I do not like it when she is like this.

This year, I got a job offer that was literally my dream job, but I was taken out 3 days in because I apparently did not talk much, when I always responded to any questions or small talk she had. That alone crushed me. I have been struggling to get another job since.

The one friend I trusted with everything said I could move in with them after they finished uni, recently told me they'd rather not. In this economy, that was my only realistic ticket out of here away from my family, I do not have other friends and I cannot afford anything.

I can't see my life getting any better, I've avoided turning to reddit to vent/talk but I really feel like I have no one to talk too anymore, even if no one responds this is something I just want off my chest. I don't want to be alone, its scary.