It’s only been a few days since my budding relationship fell apart and I’m trying really hard not to dwell but he said some very brutal things that have left me question everything about myself, I feel like I’m drifting in and out. Deep inside I feel terrible that I’ve lost him and what could have been, I miss his cuddles and how he held my hand. I’m desperately trying to make it a negative experience, mainly based on what he’s said before but then I feel flooded with those emotions again. He bought me so much stuff in those few weeks as well that it makes it hard to not think of him.