Hi everyone! I had a really weird experience today and I’d like to see if anyone relates because I’m absolutely panicking right now lol.

So, I’ve been experiencing some DPDR since I had some pretty intense health anxiety for about 4 months (constant panic attacks etc.) no worries there but I think I’m still in a hyper stimulated state. However I’m having feelings that I’ve never experienced before and they just keep popping up until I get over it and a new feeling shows up.

I recently had one about 3 hours ago that scared the sh*t out of me.

This is gonna sound weird so please bear with me. I was talking to my aunt and I decided to look at the ceiling. It’s one of those ceilings that have an interesting pattern. Sort of swirly. My brain made a connection/intrusive thought that was like “looks like a spider web” followed by a mental image of a spider-web in my mind’s eye. This all seems pretty normal. Our brain makes connections all the time but all of a sudden I felt stuck. Like I was stuck in this mental image. I couldn’t get it out of my head. I literally thought I was going to lose my mind because it was more than just a mental image. There was also a feeling that I can’t describe that came with it. I guess a certain vibe came with it. I thought it was going to be the only thing I would ever think again and that I was going to be stuck in time like this. I physically and mentally felt trapped. It eventually passed when I decided to get up and grab some gum. It was just so intense.

I’ve been feeling anxious when thinking about anything because I feel like my brain just latches on to the feelings and vibes mental images or memories give off.

I’ve been feeling things like this on and off. Like there’s a part of me that keeps having intrusive thoughts and images and the rational me is just watching them and trying to think straight again. I feel like I’m losing my mind. Sometimes I feel like my imagination can be so good that I feel like I’m doing something. So I could be imagining I’m cutting onions and then my body starts feeling the same vibes as if I were cutting onions but my mind knows I’m not. Like my body can feel trapped in the past or in a certain moment but my mind is trying to move forward. It’s like my unconscious and conscious mind are out of sync and my body and mind are out of sync.

I just don’t know what to do and I could really use some insight. Does this sound like DPDR/anxiety or is this just straight up insanity/psychosis? 

Thanks for reading :)