Its like no matter what something small makes me spiral. I hate going from super euphoric one week to angry and irritable the next. I feel so alone idk? Im either dissociating, angry, or hysterically crying.

And being with someone who doesnt understand is hard.

I also hate feeling like im too much to handle, even for myself.

I feel like my expectations are ???? Extremely unrealistic and i feel just too cruel. Im either telling myself oh! Its my mood swings, all of these feelings are invalid or !! Nobody likes me!! Everyone hates me is treating me poorly and !! I wanna kill myself.

This is all the time, rinse and repeat. Its consuming.