It's a miracle that I'm even married, so I should treat him like gold, right?

When ever I have my rages and project onto him, I threaten him with divorce. I've done it several times in the year we've been married, and I feel like utter shit about it. I apologize and he tells me it's okay, but it's not, and I can't forgive myself for it. He's so good to me, he's so patient and supportive that I can't fathom why or how he puts up with it.

What do I do with this?