A lot of what I feel is irrational. I know that and sometimes I can recognize it. But I don't know if the way I'm feeling is worth talking about. Most of the time, in my relationship I can recognize when I'm being irrational and just ignore those feelings. and sometimes it really hurts. But I know it's just me getting in my head. 

But this time, I don't know. And I really want to talk to my partner about how she hurt me. But I feel like I need to double check to make sure my feelings aren't just my rejection sensitivity causing me to over react. 

So my partner has been going through a lot. And there are times we don't see each other much because she's just not feeling well. Her depression can be crippling. And I understand that. Sometimes she doesn't even want to talk, so I just send encouraging and funny texts. It's been awhile since I've seen her, maybe a week or so. And the last time she literally came over just to sleep. 

So today it seems she's feeling better. She's texting back and making jokes. We even talked about getting married and living together soon. And since she knows this week is going to be busy, I was hoping to get together tonight. We probably won't be able to see each other again until Saturday because of my schedule and how far apart we live. So just as I was about to ask if she wants to come over, she sends me a few pictures of different dressy outfits and asked me to pick one. Nicer than I've ever seen her dress while we've been together. I really thought she was going to ask me over. But when she didn't respond back to my preference, I asked her what the occasion was. I seriously thought she was going to say that she wanted to do something together. But she said she's going over a friend's house. Which I think is great because she cuts off a lot of her friends when she gets depressed. But she could have done that tomorrow or the day after. And this friend lives near me. So when I asked if she could stop by after, even for a moment, and she said she probably won't be up to it, it just really hurt. 

So I don't know if it's me being sensitive. I want to tell her how I feel, but not if I seem clingy, needy or irrational. I mean I want her to see her friends. But I want to see her too. Not seeing each other for two weeks is so difficult. I guess I just feel like after talking about marriage today and her telling me she'd marry me tomorrow, and apologizing for isolating herself during her depression, that she'd actually want to spend time with me. I feel like I'm not important enough for her to even just stop by for a hug. Should I ignore what I'm feeling? Or tell her it hurt?