Don’t know where else to put this. Today I had the worst anxiety attack while in the car that I’ve had in six years. The whole nine yards. Hyperventilating, shaking, heart rate shot way up, heart palpitations, disorientation—all of it. In front of my wife and kid. I’m so over this. I feel like all the hard work I’ve put in to fight these past six years is gone. I feel like tomorrow I’m going to wake up a mess and have to face every day in dread. I hate this so much. But I’m going to keep fighting. I can’t give up. I’m just so tired. I feel like such a weak person even writing this. Everyone depends on me. My kid looks up to me. He thinks I’m the best. I try to put up a good front for him, but inside I feel like a week shell of what he thinks I am.

Well, enough of me whining. I just had to get this off my chest somewhere. If nobody sees this, it just helps to let it out. If you do read this and feel like giving up, just know you aren’t alone. Let’s not give up together, deal? I’m here fighting alongside you. Anyways, going to try and send this up into the atmosphere and get back into the game tomorrow.