If there is a God up there please tell me...tell me why you put me in this fucked up world with all this murder,robbery and wars plus you gave me the worst physical and mental illnesses. Why am I always getting judged by people that don’t know me? Why is the only solution to conflict violence?

And worst of all why is there no magic in this world? Everything is so mundane compared anime and tv shows I watch where the hero goes on some adventure with a grand purpose to save the world WHY just why

If only if it wasn’t self preservation than though I would’ve ended it a long long time ago. Sometimes I wish I could sleep but never wake up but deep down I know my family and friends will miss me even though I front like nobody cares