I see a lot of posts here that talk about how they have a favourite person and struggle with being without them, feeling obsessive etc. However, I feel that I'm the opposite. When someone gives me affection, or I feel a relationship is going too deep I run away and reject or ghost them. It seems that I like the idea of a friendship or relationship but when put in practice I get overwhelmed, freeze and run away.

I rarely see this type of BPD spoken about, even in posts that claim to speak of the overall experience of BPD it only explains about FPs etc. Does anyone else struggle with relationships in this way? I would be nice to have some relatability. 

Additionally, if anyone has any reddit posts, YouTube vids etc on this I'd really like to be provided with them.