I dont know what to do

Everyone on r/amiugly keeps telling me im either good looking or average. But I havent had a girlfriend and Im so scared I never will. Maybe female affection is reserved for some guys but not for me.

Frankly? Id rather get a gun and shoot myself in the head than live life alone. And i dont mean alone in a "friend" way, I want a girl to care about me the way my friends girlfriends care about them. But I feel so alone. And ugly. And unwanted. All I am is the friend. Thats how its always been, thats how it always will be.