nobody believes me and my psychiatrist said its just hormones. 
i am 14. ive been manipulative since 10 years old. i know its sick but i had sexual experiences with 4 boys, 1. was when i was 11 years old. ive been feeling empty last 2 years and i have a self harm addiction. im cutting myself. ive been in a 5 relationships all of them ended because of me and i once loved the guy ,once hated him. its hell? i tried taking pills once because i had enough. my mood changes milion timws a day sometimes every week but once im cutting myself sobbing laying on a floor and then next minute im dancing and singing tiktok sounds. i dont know what to do my psychiatrist doesnt believe me. everytime a person wants to leave me im threatening suicide i dont know why im doing that. im manipulative i want good only for myself. i care about others but also i dont. i dont know who i am i only know my name but i dont know my personality i dont know if what im saying is true or no i sometimes feel like i exist in my mind everything is blurry and i want to end life and then one minute later im laughing so hard on idk what. help me what should i do i have all bpd symptoms maybe they are right maybe its just hormones but i dont know what i should do i feel so empty