if im not sad, i just feel empty. i havent felt real happiness in over ten years. some of my earliest memories are of wanting to die. 

im in so much debt and i keep making it worse. anything i can do to make my mental health better will make the debt worse, which will make my mental health worse. 

as soon as it starts to get better it just gets worse. i dont know what to do anymore, ive tried everything. 

id end it all right now if it didnt leave my partner in such a tough position. 

i wish someone would help me and care for me. i just want it to be over. please help me i cant do this much longer