I perpetually feel like I don’t deserve to be here when there’s so much poverty and injustice around the world. In 2019-2020 I volunteered driving elderly people to their appointments, and this year switched to driving for meals on wheels. I thought doing these things would help me feel better but I still hate myself for not doing enough. Then I start thinking about what else I can do, but inevitably I realize I can’t save the world so why bother trying? This loop of thoughts sometimes goes on endlessly. I’ve thought this way since I was a kid. I feel like these thoughts are one of the core factors influencing my BPD traits.