A couple months ago I started dating this guy who is absolutely amazing.  We get along wonderfully and communicate well.  Through therapy and who knows what I had gotten pretty okay with dealing with/coping with the BPD stuff (fear of abandonment, extreme emotions etc) and had honestly largely forgot it. (sounds silly but...) However, a few weeks ago this fear of abandonment/irrational fear of him not actually liking me etc etc starts to creep in which is extremely annoying until I realize, oh right, BPD.  I'm very problem solving oriented and maybe because I don't trust my emotions entirely I tend to try to structure things. I think it through, try to come up with a solution and realize that I need to talk to him about it.  I'm not really sure what to say so I send him an email attempting to explain things.  Long story short - we talk and I think everything's okay but during our talk he mentions that it reminds him of his ex wife. Thinking about the stories he tells me it sounds like she very well could have had untreated BPD and I know that relationship was really damaging to him.  While I'm sure I will exhibit some of the same behaviors as his ex wife to some degree at some point, I am also in therapy, fairly self-aware (I think) and have a good support network so I would like to think that our relationship will continue to be mutually supportive and not destructive.  However, I think the similarities may be freaking him out and he seems to have shut down, but I'm also not sure if it's me freaking out and worrying about rejection after sharing this.  Has anyone else had experience dating someone whose previous partner had BPD and consequently resulted in an abusive relationship that made their partner have some negative preconceived notions etc etc?

tl;dr - My fairly new boyfriend's ex most likely had untreated BPD which resulted in their relationship being pretty bad.  I also have BPD, although mine is treated and currently fairly manageable.  I'm concerned about him withdrawing and him previous experience causing issues with him accepting me and comparing me to a bad past experience.  What can I do? 