Sometimes when I'm away from the people in my life, I tear them apart in my head and just ruminate over every single thing they've done to offend or hurt me - and I can't stop thinking about annoying characteristics they have. Especially in romantic relationships. But when I meet up with these people and spend time with them, its like my perception of them shifts and I have a hard time thinking of them as "bad" people. This has sabatoged a lot of relationships in my life. Am I splitting? 

I'm not diagnosed with BPD but I do have bipolar disorder and PTSD. I was looking up a list of psychological defense mechanisms and saw black and white thinking listed as one of them, and was wondering if anyone else could provide some insight as to what exactly I'm experiencing since I understand that splitting is very common with BPD.