I sometimes wonder what I did wrong to have such a terrible life. My childhood wasn’t good; which affected my adulthood. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety. I don’t deserve the bs I go through. I look at other people and see how happy and successful they are; they have a good life, and I wonder why. Why do some people suffer and others don’t? Why do some people go through trauma and abuse and others don’t? Why do some people have mental health problems and others don’t? Why do some people live the good life and others don’t? WHY!? 

These questions also play a big part in my lack of faith in god. I tried really really hard to have faith in god. I started a journey a year ago and recently ended it because there’s so much that doesn’t make sense to, so much that seems unfair, and it was making my depression worse! I have so many questions that no one has the answers to. I can’t believe in something I don’t understand.

I just know life is unfair.