I need to vent &amp; have some advice. It’s a long one, grab some popcorn. 

So… I don’t really have anything I should be compliant but life is hell for me and so it is for everyone I know. Is this normal? Is it me?
I emigrated to another country with the hope to find something better. I wake up at 6am, half an hour to re-wire my brain after the nightmares and I stand up. I resolve problems/ send emails/ etc while eating breakfast, go to work in a place where people are toxic, part time. I’ve studied 10 years and barely make a living with my wage. Started a PhD with the hope to find better, didn’t win any funds atm, so working for free. 
Outside work I don’t have much, no friends here. My bf still back in my old country, and I started to notice he was/is  abusive, but I’m still not sure about it. My parents were abusive. I struggle, sport is the only thing that giving me purpose atm (but with covid is on/off). 
I constantly hear bad news: my bf with ill parents, my mom struggling, my grandmother slowly loosing her autonomy to live alone. 
Everyone I know seems to be in constant war, just waiting to die. If I ask what they think, they say it’s constant war with “happy part” of their life being a few hour every other week of silence or peace from problems. 
I try to always address problems directly, I have ptsd and having support. But still, is this normal? Is it me? I’m young (32), nice and have brain, I don’t live in a war affected country, but I hate this life and want something better.