&amp;#x200B;

Well, here I am, December 29th, 2021, the second year of the pandemic. Woman, 28 years old. I quit my job 3 months ago and haven't gotten one yet. I have applied to some jobs that have excited me by their trajectory and culture, but they have not finally come out.

Right now I was scrolling LinkedIn, looking at the feed that can get a bit repetitive. I felt I needed to get this out of my chest. Hi Reddit!

I try to be optimistic, I know the capabilities and qualities that I have to do a job in an excellent way and exceed any expectations, but sometimes this just seems to be exhausting.

It's funny how in my opinion, there is either success or I prefer to die ... yes, it can be a joke in bad taste, but sometimes I feel that everything is so difficult... I feel so much anxiety and concern when applying for a job, at the time of the response for interview or at the time of clicking refresh to my email with the hope of a response that does not arrive.

I know it is very cowardly to think about die, and this is something that has always been in my head... 

I am motivated by my family, to see them happy, to give them what we never had. My desire has always been to make people happy, to improve everything in which I can intervene. This has been the case in my personal life and even more so in my work. Always looking to improve processes, have very good relationships with my team, achieve goals, always looking for the purpose of making customers happy.

It's pitiful... ashamed to accept that I am in a bad moment. I didn't tell my family that I had quit until 1 month after I did. Hoping not to be judged, hoping not to disappoint anyone.

Do I regret of quitting my job? Not at all. A job that was making my back and legs sick from sitting for so long, working more than 15 hours a day, management making changes that had no purpose and that added a lot more workload, clearly without monetary recognition.

I am perhaps sorry for not having already found a job. But, I tell you exactly what happened. I am looking for the job of my dreams, and this, do not think that it is to do nothing and get paid. I have always been a passionate person for what I do, who loves hard work and effort. I want a job where I can feel that my performance is making a change, where I can improve statistics, processes.

Money runs out and like everyone else, there are receipts, cards to pay, etc.

This makes me feel out of air, I feel like I'm suffocating...

I have never used the Reddit, I have checked it a couple of times. It seems to be a place where I can say what I feel, behind this screen, crying and sad. It's all about the money...

Even if no one sees this, I feel a little more free.

If only...