As long as i can remember, I’ve always had phases in which I wanted to be/look like someone else. Someone people would like better than me. Right now, I have the same struggle. My boyfriend(20) of 1 year (we have a fearly healthy relationship in spite of my bpd) used to have a crush on a gay girl before he met me. (I’m his first girlfriend) They were friends but she ended the friendship because he touched her inappropriately although she was giving him mixed signals. Then she told the whole school about it to make him look bad. He stopped going to that school due to bad grades. He had already told me about this before his old classmate sent me a dm about why my boyfriend had chosen me as his girlfriend. He said that he was looking for a girl who looks just like that gay girl he used to like. To replace her. So fucked up right?! I have talked about this with my boyfriend and he said it’s bullshit and I believe him, since I look nothing like her in the first place. But now, I just can’t stop myself from comparing myself to her although I’ve never even met her. I check her instagram everyday and try to get to know everything about her so I can copy her. I KNOW IT’S SOO WEIRD and I feel so awful for being like this. It’s depressing. This happens to me all the time and I just can’t stop it for some reason. I’m like a stalker.. what can i do to stop this for ever and just be happy with the person who I already am and believe that people can like me for who I am? Please help