I feel so pathetic as a 22 year old who cannot drive. When I was on my Ls - I was either constantly panicked because I was not in "control" of the other cars - fearing they would just run into me at any time - OR I was completely faded out and dead to the world, which resulted in me running red lights and almost hitting a kid without even noticing (that was when I stopped trying).

Even in the passenger seat, I've been trying to train myself and stay mindful - but I still panic that people will run into me, or just day dream. Pretty similar reasons that I cannot hold a job - my "fight or flight" response is triggered constantly, and it's so intense - "How are you?" I either get super defensive and attack the person for asking me, or I just give up and walk out because that question is too hard to answer. Stupid things like that just set me off... I've gotten better at "waiting" before acting on these impulses, as the panic only lasts 5-20 minutes for small things like that, but people start to think I'm insane, or I never get my job done because I'm constantly trying to calm down.

Every DBT group I've been to, the BPDs there are working, and driving around. Yes they're struggling in different areas. But I feel so broken. So different and like I don't belong there. 

Am I alone in this?