I’m really tired of it. I wanna feel fulfilled by SOMETHING other than reckless spending, but nothing holds me over for very long. The feelings of boredom and emptiness are SO heavy and uncomfortable, I don’t even know what to do about it. It feels like my life’s not even mine. I’m either doing what everyone else wants, or nothing at all, and everyone’s watching me fail all the time. I hold my breath for my bf to break up with me because of how I don’t have literally anything together and can’t seem to be as independent and grown-up as I need to be. How do I feel like I have a purpose?