i get along with people quiet easily, we start talking on a daily basis, get close, i tend to fantasize the idea of what this person could be and then a wave of emotions just hit me and i think about how the person I've opened up to, loved and trusted could easily leave me without any explanation. i want them to stay but leave at the same time bc I'm so fucked up for them to waste their time on me, as soon as i sense the slightest bit of disinterest, responding my texts a bit later, my fear of abandonment crawls up and i ghost them, thinking that they will get tired of me one day, so i leave them before they do.

I'm not diagnosed with bpd tho but yeah