a friend recently reached out and said i ghosted him, which is true, i did because i felt like killing myself almost everyday, and i told him i was sorry, after apologizing he told me he thought we were close and i tried to explain that its really hard to talk and be friends when i didnt feel wanted by anyone around. it sort of blew up in my face and ended with him saying everyone stopped caring about me and how he did too, and how i pissed him off. he told me it was a bad move to do that and now i just feel like shit again. what do i even do at this point?