It's the emotion of death, it just EATS at me from the inside. I feel like if there's any emotion that drives me to suicide, jealousy will be it. The thought of a girl I like having sex with someone else just makes me sob uncontrollably. All I can think while experiencing the emotion is "I DON'T WANT TO FEEL THIS WAY ANYMORE". If it's in relation to someone's ex, I'll start stupidly pushing the issue in the hopes of making the emotion go away. I guess the only cure is a lot of attention on ME, enough to make the jealousy irrelevant. 

But I'm literally autistic and can't handle it. I go into a depression and feel really irritable. I just want to be alone in my bed, masturbate, and sleep. Speaking of which, I find masturbating incredibly cathartic in these situations (and I'm typically masturbating to photos of the person I like). I don't entirely understand why yet, but this is something I would like to look into further.