I know I deal with anxiety, but when it comes to dating its awful. I have actively been finding ways to help it. Im cutting way back on caffeine and right now Im brewing a cup of lavender/chamomile tea. Its when I actually start liking someone. I see a pattern. I start off good and then anxiety takes over. It usually comes out in texting. I'll over text and over explain myself.  Currently dating situation was going amazing and then after the 3rd date I began to blow it. Called her and spiraled in thoughts and then have been having so much anxiety over text as she has backed  off a bit. I'll do all sorts of things to level myself out and I'll start to feel good, then bam anxiety attack. In the moment of anxiety I do the dumbest things. I am seeing a therapist which has begun to help some. I just keeping I've learend my lesson. That next time I'll be aware of the anxiety and not respond  or call until that passes. But I fail everytime.   


I went to the climbing gym yesterday and ended up talking to some random people which really helped. I'll tried cooking to get stuff on my mind. I journal too. But I still wonder what else I need to do. I dont want to take medication, but I do wish there was something I could take on occasion when it gets bad.   


It just sucks to feel like my anxiety is what is holding me back. I overthink things I said and then think of the worst possible interpretation of it. Then I'll start explaining what I actually meant and spiral with no landing.   


If anyone has any advice Id be happy to hear it. btw im 29m.