i think i have trauma from my dad and past bfs never being able to be sober around me (doing drugs and smoking weed behind my back literally in the same house as me after ive asked them not to because it makes me uncomfortable) it just was like none of them could stop for my benefit and they always had to be high and lied to me and put it before me and my current bf who i love very much smokes or does edibles idr before we got back together idk if they still do but weve talked about it before and how triggering it is to me and they said i was more important than that but that was last year when we were together a different time and thinking about him talking to me high at all makes me want to die and breakup with him and never talk to him again bexause it hurts and we havent talked about it again and i dont want to becUse it makes me feel so stupid i cant tell if this is fair because it reallly feels like i will never be able to move past this as a hard limit and it makes me feel like im the bad guy or hate fun which isnt true but i jsut dont know what to do