I’ve been going to group DBT therapy for the past couple of months and I’ve been learning skills for listening and de-escalating fights and triggers.
When using these skills my partner often shames me for them by saying things like:
“the fact that my partner has to wash their face with cold water (dbt skill) and go for a run in order to listen to my emotions fucking sucks” 
or
“you’re not really apologizing, you’re just trying to tick off a box on your DBT list to feel like a good person.”
I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this while trying to work on healthy skills with their loved ones. I’m not sure if I’m being overly emotional about it or if they have a valid point there.