I'm typing this as I have an actual breakdown at work with my door closed so no one can see/hear me crying my fucking eyes out. It's just all too much, the feelings of constant inadequacy, feelings of never being good enough for anyone, the potential romances that lead to "I don't want a relationship with anyone right now." but then finding out they're seeing someone else/fucking other people. I've gone beyond my wits end and just can't do it. I want people to care, I want people to see how much pain I'm in but I'm surrounded by people who just don't care. I vent online, on here and in online games because I've gotten that desperate for someone to care or at least let me know they do, online games being obviously the worst medium considering it leads to trolls telling me to kill myself or "no one asked" 

What the actual fuck is wrong with me? I feel all of this is pointless, I feel all the therapy and the attempts at bettering my life lead to nowhere if I've got no one to share it with.  Am I destined to be alone in all my interpersonal relationships? Am I destined to have it all come crashing down in a spectacular hindenburg-esque explosion?

Someone please help me.