I can’t even begin to emphasize the incomprehensible lack of value that I hold. Think of any negative human trait, I have it. Think of any positive human trait, I don’t have it. Think of any skill or activity, I suck at it. There is no god, but if there is, he made me as a joke. Like “Haha let’s make the most, annoying, worthless, stupid, lazy, ugly, talentless, unskilled, and awkward piece of shit possible and see how long it takes for him to kill himself”. And before you say “get medication”, “get a therapist”, or “go to a treatment center”, I’ve done all of that countless times each plus more over the past 10 fucking years and I’ve never gotten better, I’ve never felt happy, and I’ve never been good at anything. My existence feels like an enigma. Like how can one human be this ludicrously worthless. I still have a hard time grasping it. I can’t wait to I finally build up the courage to kill myself. At least I won’t be around to see nobody notice