I have BPD,bipolar and ADHD,I'm off my bipolar meds and it makes it really hard  to have a relationship and I'm just toxic...I'm just bad at it.I  lost the love of my life because of my mental health issues and how manipulative I was and bad at communicating,and it makes me feel like I'll never find anyone like him ever again,ADHD meds are illegal where I live too,should I work on myself? Should  I find someone who can deal with my mental health issues? I don't know.