Hi Reddit not sure how to start this but yeah I know I have a couple of problems with myself got a twin who has schizophrenia and so did my mums side granddad. 

But I can’t stop shaking the feeling that I feel like to have a life I gotta hurt someone never have hurt anyone in my life but I get this thoughts of doing this fucked up stuff it just isn’t me though I’m worried about it I never will act it out  but it’s getting to the point where I can’t stop having breakdowns I just think I was put here to bring hurt but it’s not who I am as a person. 

If anyone knows what mental problem this is would love to know I can’t help but feel empty unless I think of it I struggle to understand my feelings and what to make of it.