Im a 24 ugly, unlovable loser. Ive been rejected and friendzoned my whole life. I tried to get better and improve my life and all I got was more sulcidal thoughts. I lost my best years. I cant get it back. Ive been depressed for years, 5 maybe 6 already. Ive been sulcidal since highschool. Once ive almost killed myself but chickened out. Why cant i just die rn