I'm just tired. I'm supposed to be in the prime of my life at 30 and I'm just ready to throw in the towel. Just about every step of my life has been marred by events I wish I didn't happen. And I really have tried to pick myself up, brush it off, and push on. I know some things that have happened in life are my own doing. So I've tried to address them and get on the other side of them... but I'm just drowning.

I'm tired of wearing masks for everyone else. My life is shit and I've been treated like it, and I feel like I can't hide the pain I'm carrying anymore. I'm tired of being the only parent of my child. I'm tired of my career floundering. I'm tired of trying to meet new people and feeling not good enough. I literally feel like a broken person. I feel like my life has too much baggage for me to ever sort out and I'm destined to just be this fucking exile who can't live the life he wants.