 

Hey so i was diagnosed with bipolar a year ago. I tried bunch of pills and i ended up with lithium. Im a high school student so the beginning of the year was just perfect, i was stable. I had good grades and everything was just great. I actually deal with hallucinations on a daily basis. 1 and a half month ago, i stopped going to school. I stopped showering i was in bed all day until i stopped sleeping because i was scared i was gonna die. I felt in connection with another dimension. So my pdoc thought i was manic and gave me olanzapine i was great for 2 or 3 days and then she started tappering off the olanzapine. I just got back to how i was. I have hallucinations and delusions. I told her how desperate and lonely i was and she just answered that i should go back to school. I then decided to contact an old pdoc and she agreed to see me. I felt so happy to see her again coz im attached to her. Theres probably something wrong with my diagnosis. I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 with psychotic features but how come i hv hallucinations all the time all day and i believe plenty of things. Once i woke up and went to ask my dad if i was dreaming. Theres something wrong and the greatest thing is that i dont want to d1e so i look a bit unbelievable. Im stuck in this simulation where everyone tells me that i should be okay. i know the truth and they dont so theyre trying to make me feel bad. Im going to fight back. I feel like my post is getting more like a vent. Thats probably coz i cant organize my thoughts.

Just know that life is going to get better. We're all gonna be happy.