
Hello, it is 4am at the moment and I am a bit drunk (have been using alcohol at night to cope). I’m not sure what to do anymore. I am 22 and have a social services type job that I absolutely love, but as soon as I go home I am empty inside and want to quit because I feel like it is “too much for me” right now. I work 6 days a week and can’t lose this job or take off (it’s hourly pay) because I need the money, but am battling self harm and thoughts of suicide to the point that I worry that I won’t be healthy enough to continue. I’m seeing a therapist weekly but there are no intensive programs where I live, which I feel is what I need. I have work tomorrow but am afraid it almost isn’t appropriate (I work at a domestic violence shelter and am the only employee on the weekends) because of my mental state. At the same time I have called in twice this week and would feel terrible doing it again, my boss doesn’t know I have a mental illness and I would like to keep it that way. Does anyone have any kind words or advice? I would really appreciate some support right now. Sorry for how much I rambled. 