So almost a year ago exactly, I had a random panic attack. I was about to lay down and watch tv with my wife and daughter, and boom. My wife took me to the hospital because I’ve never had one like this.

I’ve had anxiety my entire life. I was always told it was just nerves until I got older. The anxiety has always made simple things tough to me but I’ve always managed. After my attack I can not get my life back to normal. I’ve never taken sertraline like I was supposed to. I always took it if I got really irritable and it would help me be happy and energized for about a week before I took it again. 

Since the panic attack I don’t want to go to certain places or have “memories “ of flashbacks of that time. Sometimes I’m in a great mood and so happy, then, boom I’m sick at my stomach and want to cry.

I’m now on low dosage of sertraline and bupropion. I feel amazing one minute and scared of everything the next. I’m scared to change medications or drop them because I’m afraid I’ll go through depression. I just want to go back to normal. I want to have normal anxiety again lol.

Has anyone ever had an attack and now they can’t get back on track? I dissociate a few times a week and I’m wondering if my meds are working against me. I can’t even go to Walmart and when it starts getting dark I get bad anxiety because thats when I had the attack.

Sorry for the long read I just don’t know what to do and I need to move forward. If I start thinking about it, it gets worse, but how do I stop letting it run my life?