I isolated from my friends for a month. Read my messages, tried to pretend it was okay. I hate myself more.

My dad's going through intense stage 3 cancer treatment and I'm the only caregiver that can help. It's been frustrating and depressing.

During the chemotherapy treatments I discovered my ex of 7 years who ghosted me 3 years ago, got engaged to another man. Not going into the story again all here: https://www.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/u8a9o0/i_died_a_long_time_ago_my_body_just_hasnt_caught/

I hate everyone. I hate god. I hate my friends. I hate my therapist. I hate my medications. I hate my genetics. I hate my body for being alive. I hate my job. I hate my life. I hate my depression.

There is no help coming. I'm all alone with no one to depend on. I hope I die soon.