Just finished finals. I think I did well, straight A's. Why do I still feel nothing. Why do I still not want to watch a movie, play a videogame with my bro, hang out with my amazing gf. 

I consumed too much caffeine + my legitimate low dose of prescription adderall today pulling an all nighter to get my grades. After the final, a nasty mix with too much caffeine landed me in my schools clinic. Heart rate 150+, blood pressure so high they looked scared and did three goes, EKG revealing a fascicular block whatever tf that is, urged me to go the ER and started talking about "hypothetically" what ER I would like to go to in the "what if" 

I don't care, but im scared, if that makes sense. Today was supposed to be my catharsis (finals done, woo!) but instead im laying here on reddit at least 48 hours without sleep, weak and barely able to hold my phone up. Im so delirious and the best I can describe it is that it hurts to exist