Hey guys! My best friend (and I guess FP) is so so wonderful to me. He’s so kind and patient, he’s never judged me through my mental health journey, he always forgives me, etc. 
but sometimes I am SO determined to paint him as the villain. 

Like he has never had a guard up around me and has even told me “unless you did something really fucked up there isn’t anything you can do to make me cut you off”

And I get in such great places where I don’t worry about us, I don’t get hurt when he’s busy, I’m not afraid to be myself. And then we’ll hang one night, it’ll go great, and I’ll go home and be hysterical about how he can’t possibly love me and I suffocate him and exhaust him and I’m gonna be too much for him if I don’t pull back. 
Almost to the point where one day, he’s my very best friend and the next day I think about just calling him and telling him I don’t want to see him again. 
I know MOST of this is probably insecurity and fear but is the sudden “omg were besties!” Vs “he hates me he hates me I don’t mean anything to him I should just end it” a form of splitting? 
When I have these flips it also drastically changes how I view him. Viewing him as he is and good vs suddenly thinking he’s an ass