I've been diagnosed with GAD and have had a few pretty bad panic attacks in my life. Last night I was driving from my old apartment to my first house I just bought with the last load of my house plants (I had about 35 in the car, it's a hobby of mine).

For some reason I'm still unsure of, I started having a panic attack. My heart rate went up, the pit of my stomach dropped, I felt woozy, broke out in cold sweat, and felt extremely anxious. Right before going onto the highway, I pulled to the side off the road with my hazards on to give myself time to come down off of this panic attack. I called my partner, who was at the house, and told him I was having a panic attack and he  worked with me to help me get grounded and calm. 

I ended the call after about 8 minutes and told him I would call him back when I felt good to drive again. The intensity of the attack was coming in waves at this point, but it was gradually lessening. Less than 2 minutes after the call ended, someone rammed full speed into the back of my car. My car was lurched forward with an awful crunch, plant dirt and debris flew every where, I was thrown forward but my seat belt caught me. I was OFF the road to the side with my hazards on, this guy had to have somehow swerved and not seen my car to have hit me. 

I had no immediate injuries, but I was terrified. I've never heard myself scream like that. The panic attack I had almost gotten under control was now replaced with absolute mayhem of fear and pure adrenaline. The guy came out of his car and approached mine, I was already on the phone with police. He kept trying to give me his license and saying he was going to give me his insurance info. I was sobbing and telling him to wait I'm on the phone with the police. He handed me his license, so I took a picture of it while trying to describe to the location to the 911 operator. He took his license and drove off without getting his insurance. He spoke not great English and I think he was terrified and didn't know what to do. 

The police came with an ambulance. They took my vitals. I had no pain in my neck, back, stomach, or any where. I told the police what happened and showed them the pic of this guy's license. They were like "WTF this guy gave you his license but not his insurance and drove off?" That is a hit and run felony. I think the guy was trying to do the right thing but got scared and fled. The police caught him in about 30 mins. Turns out a car with a lot of front damage can't get very far.

My car was totaled, the back wheel was completely torn off and the back axel was twisted beyond repair. Many of my house plant's pots had shattered immediately. I had to leave half of them in the car as it got taken to an impound lot because there wasn't enough room in my friend's car who came and picked me up. I loved this car so much, it saved my fucking life. I was beside myself seeing it being towed away, broken beyond repair, with some of my beautiful house plants still in it. 

I am fully covered for by insurance so they will be paying me out for the value of my car. I will be able to go to the impound lot to get the remainder of my plants and belongings. 

What just strikes me as so fucking cruel was that I had a panic attack and chose to safely move off the road to not put myself or other drivers in danger, and I still got hit and my car was totaled. 

I'm so grateful to still be alive and not in tjr hospital. But I'm scared about what this means for me and my anxiety moving forward. Will I have PTSD from this? Will I be scared of driving/cars moving forward?