That's how big the toll is. A normal person definitely gets set back tries hard overcomes the problem. 



But a depressed fuck like me is struck in infinite loop. There's no ending till I fucking die. 28 and still struck in same position as I was a decade ago. Lost my third job in a matter of 7 months due to emotional instability and dysfunctional brain. Have been taking half a dozen medications, regular visits to psychiatrist but the same idiot psycho and retard. I think it's all my fault. My mother tells me not to say these things to anyone, but as the retard I am, I just blurt it out automatically. Seeing my grandmother having her last moments painfully struggling of asthma, she begs to God to take her and I feel if I could trade her place. A rest assurance I have is I have inherited her illness and host of other problems and I wish my death be even more tragic than her due to being a disgrace for being a human and to my parents, who just see me as a baggage they have to carry till they die. 



From a person who fakes his "illness" to take advantage of others because he is physically fit with no deformities and had gotten privileges that many in this world didn't. Still he couldn't capitalise on them and made excuses that other wouldn't have if they got the same privilege.