ive fallen back into my old feelings of dread. i convinced myself and everyone else that i was cured. but theyre starting to see who i truly am again. im a hopeless person. the slightest change of attitude in someone sends me into a downward spiral of "they hate me im so annoying im so clingy im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry". all i want is to be held tight and told everything that makes me feel better. i cant even think of an example. i cant express my feelings properly, i feel like i cant breathe. im so scared because im going to ruin things with someone i love. its not their responsibility to understand whats wrong with me. its not their responsibility to cosset me. i dont want to be a burden anymore. i dont want someone to have to be so gentle with me. but at the same time i need that otherwise i'll die