So I lost almost my entire close group of friends in dribs &amp; drabs over the last year, but mainly around February due to how my BPD was causing me to act. Some said they "wanted space" but still haven't heard from from (and won't), others deleted me from social media, some simply stopped replying to me and hoped that I would get the picture. I was just being diagnosed at the time and it was really tough for me emotionally. 

There is one particular person in the friend group, a guy I was best friends with for around 7 years who just stopped talking to me during the this time without explanation. He then sent me a birthday message a couple of months back so I replied. We have exchanged a few messages since June, but nothing more than surface level stuff - how we are doing, his work, holidays, etc. He said a month or so back that he would like to meet up, so we said we wild organise that in due course.

Now this guy was one of the people who I kinda felt would get back in contact with me. According to another person in the group who didn't leave me, he used to stick up for me or tell people to stop if someone else was mean about me in his presence, if I was used as a talking point at group events, etc, which was nice to hear. 

The thing is - I don't really know how to navigate this. He says he wants to meet up soon but take our relationship 'step by step' as we've been apart for a while, he loves me and things are a little too much too soon. This statement made me feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me, when I didn't even do anything on this person in the first place, just was a lot to deal with when I was unwell, I was being diagnosed, had impulse issues with drugs, lost my job and had to move home. Everything happened to me at once and my life was crumbling. I always felt hard done by that my friends didn't really care about all of these external factors. 

I honestly feel like I've dealt with the pain and have been to therapy to help me with this. The pain still exists in pangs but for the most part, I'm over it and have adjusted to not having a big group of friends anymore. I really want to meet my friend, but I don't know how to navigate this. I don't want a friendship that exists on a surface level that was once so rich, close and full of laughter. I'm still hurt that my friends left me when I needed them most and regardless of why they did it. I don't ever think that feeling will completely go and it has 100% changed me as a person.

Has anyone else here been in a situation like this or where someone important wants to come back into their life after a while?

Thanks