I've tried ending it all three times within the past week. 

What am I doing wrong. 

Today he messaged me:

"You really say people leave but they leave because you just continue this fucking bullshit until they can't take it anymore. It's never been about anyone not caring. You force them to fucking hate you. Then you blame everyone for fucking leaving."

"And now it's definitely apprent (the woman he had been cheating on me with) was definitely an upgrade 🥳😍"

I haven't stopped sh since he said that. He's not wrong. 

I don't want to be alive anymore. Someone please just end it for me.