I had really super intense emotions from like euphoria to deep depression and extreme anxiety after he would decide to not see me. I am currently a lot better at handling my emotions but am at a loss in deciding whether I should continue pursuing this person. I rarely feel something like this for someone so if i let the opportunity go, I may not feel this way for a few years. I like this feeling a lot, obviously. lol 

We seem to be enablers for one another because this is an ongoing process/relationship that never has a definite end. We have not had a steady relationship at all. We have seen each other 6 times over the last 6 months. About every two months I reach out and he accepts and is very kind to me and accepting. In between him dropping me and picking me back up, we usually maintain a friendly relationship, with some interaction in between the time we meet. I always am the one to instigate a re-spark or meet up, but he is the one who always expresses sexual interest after I do so. I have been very interested in him since i began seeing him, but maintain outward emotional distance in my interactions with him. He is very aware of codependence so i try my best not to act crazy or infatuated lol. 

Welllllll...i saw him again a few days ago, under the guise of meeting to gather some things he was willing to give me. I hung out for a few hours and then he instigated sex. I was trying to maintain physical distance so as to respect his previous decision to not pursue any sexual or romantic relationship with me. But yeah, he instigated the sex. It was the most organic and natural sex we've had and seemed like the one time we've shared some complex, confusing mutual feelings for each other outside. I invited him to hang out with me a few days layer and he said he thought about it for awhile but didn't want to be "tempted". So, seems like there are some confusing emotions he has about me but has ultimately decided to not see me. He said hes likely moving soon, etc. Doesn't wanna introduce this element into an unstable living situation, i guess.

So....what do i do?? Everytime I message him, he let's me back in. Now he finally shows some emotional interest but continues to hang back. I text him now and he responds neutrally/positively to my sexual advances but does not pursue. Lol. 

I feel like if i continue to pursue, he might say yes to me. But i also feel like its not healthy for me to do that. Like other people would simply drop it. But the pattern is so clear that i am tempted to continue. Idk what is sane and isn't anymore in this situation.

What do i do? Thoughts? I'm pretty much a recovering BPD. 