So Ive been in and out of therapy for the last two years and was originally diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder with occasional depressive episodes. Because of this i was on and off lexapro 10mg for a while before ultimately deciding to stop it cause I didn’t want to be on medication. However, things started to go downhill for me earlier this fall, and i found myself back in therapy. Because things had gotten super bad,  i opened up about my feelings to this new therapist a lot more than i ever had, and she mentioned that the things i was talking about sounded a lot like BPD. Long story short, I now have a BPD diagnosis along with my GAD. I met with my old psychiatrist who gave me a couple options for meds to try, one of which being Lexapro 10mg again. The other two were Lamotrigine and Abilify. I went back on the Lexapro 10mg to try and stabilize my anxiety which was my worst symptom; it worked for about a month but now starting to slip backwards again, especially with the rage and the mood swings, so thinking of trying a new course of meds. Abilify is sadly out of the question due to its huge price; I am considering Lamotrigine but I’m worried about the side effects plus I am on a combined birth control pill and i heard they interact. 

Basically I would really like some advice from other people who struggle with BPD and know a lot more about meds than I do. My psychiatrist is unfortunately somewhat difficult to get a hold of, and no one else in my family knows about my new diagnosis, so dealing with this by all by myself.

Thanks in advance :) 