I feel crazy a lot of times. I can never tell when it's time to let go of a friendship because the person has wronged me, or if I should forgive them because that's what a "normal" person would do. For example I've got a guy I've been talking to who won't make it official but kept telling me he liked me, my close friends have told me he's using me but I can't tell. He tells me he isn't and I can't tell if my feelings are justified when I tell him I feel used because he reacts as if I'm crazy and says "I told you I'm not using you so you're putting words in my mouth" which then makes me think "is he gaslighting me? Or am I really being crazy and putting words in his mouth??" So then I have no idea if it's time to move on or not!! Or my best friend (who happens to be my FP since I was 9, and I'm 28 now) got mad at me over a misunderstanding, I tried to apologize but she still ignored me for a whole week and a half, knowing I have BPD and knowing I could go over the edge due to the perceived abandonment. She's done this before and ignored me for months at a time, which has put me in bad spots like staying with abusive partners because I had no FP and clung to my abusive partner since I didn't have her and was afraid if I left I'd have no one, so I said this was the final straw and that I would never talk to her again. I told myself how could she do this knowing I could potentially hurt myself or have an episode, and that if she was really my best friend she wouldn't abandon me like this and that it isn't healthy to have her in my life knowing she could flip on me at any moment and ignore me. But then we made up and I thought okay maybe I'm overreacting? I never know! How do I learn to trust my own emotions? How do I learn to know when I'm just overreacting? And most importantly, how do I learn to know when I'm being gaslit? Thank you!