I feel awful lately. My anxiety is driving me mad. I am constantly feeling overwhelmed. I constantly feel aggravated and just in a shitty mood. I feel like I'm sabotaging my life lately. I feel like I'm pushing away my partner, and I constantly apologize but eventually it's going to break. I'm tired all the time now. I don't ever feel good. I'm taking my anxiety medication so much more lately just to get through a day. I feel so sluggish and useless.

I feel grumpy all the damn time. I haven't had a good night's sleep in a very long time and I literally do not know how to. I have cut back on caffeine, I try to finish before 9 and wind down. I don't know what to do. I just want to stop feeling this way. I just want to be alone all the time. I feel so bad for my partner because of this. We don't get to see each other a lot because she works so many hours. Her schedule messes me up to because she works so much and stays so much later than she needs to so I never know when she's going to get off. Her schedule changes weekly too so I can't keep track of it. I've been a huge jerk to her and I'm trying to not be but I've had so much anxiety it's driving me crazy.

I don't know how to control this. It feels like I'm treading water but my arms are getting tired.