I posted this over at cptsd but maybe it should be here I don't know if this is something to do with cptsd or bpd.........I'm trying to figure out why I am always acting as someone,it's like if I am not pretending to be someone then I feel like no-one,  I choose some character or type of person to be then this gives me enough confidence to go out of the house because I feel everyone is looking at me as this person I have become and they don't see the real me which is just a sense of pain,brokenness,smallness, invisible, nothing, disgusting etc etc, i have been doing this for many many years I will see someone in the street or on a movie and think that I want to be that so I become that in my head then externally dress and act like that and I will do that for as long as a year or as little as half hour but when this identity wears off I crash and feel non existent and am falling through space, existential crises and panic etc, then I start searching for who I can be next and can go through 20 different characters in my head in 30 minutes until I find someone to be, and I feel dead and non existent or I freak out until I am acting as someone else again, is something to do with bpd?