Yesterday I decided to post in two sub Reddit threads. I’ve made other posts. My very first post had a large response. But I was not prepared for the overwhelming number of responses that came in this time. 

I love that so many want to talk, it’s a confidence booster. But I’m the type of person that wants to methodically go through and read the messages and then respond. Every time I think I have caught up, more have piled in. I know, first world problems, woe is me. 

I took a break a few times today to give my introvert, anxious self a break. I went to my softball game (something that I love but that also gives me some major anxiety).  The field we played on was switched, we didn’t get the dugout I thought we would, I felt my anxiety rising and the tears building. I talked with a teammate that also has anxiety and it calmed down. Every little thing that went wrong or that I didn’t do “right” (even though they were fine and things worked out) I could feel the tears welling up. 

I want to meet people and talk to them. I love that process. I don’t want anyone to feel ignored or like I don’t want to give them my time, but I feel like I have to take a step back. 

I’m not sure what I’m hoping to get out of this post. Maybe just to get my thoughts down.