Wondering *how* people on here post about how they actively still use Borderline tactics &amp; behaviours like manipulation, using your sexuality, self harming, causing fights, snooping etc. etc. &amp; actively *know* you’re doing these things, enough to post about it &amp; y’all feel bad or whatever but like.... just keep doing the things? Sometimes I read shit on here &amp; I’m like! If you know you’re being abusive or snoopy or petty just don’t! Profiles with multiple posts about fighting w partners, stalking FP’s, feeling bad about self-harming in front of partners, cheating, petty snooping.. 
I feel like as soon as I found out about my BPD (which is “quiet” I guess you’d say) I have actively made sure even if I have borderline *thoughts*, I do not act fucking crazy (ableist, sorry.).. but what I mean by that is encompassing behaviours that make borderlines look bad. Crazy to me is knowing you’re doing something you don’t like but continuing to do it. After I’d been diagnosed (maybe some months before when I researched my behaviours &amp; shit enough to diagnose myself) &amp; things started making sense as to why I thought the way I did, therefore acted the way I did, I genuinely thought only people who were wilfully indignant &amp; refused to change because of shame, &amp; people who were undiagnosed &amp; unhelped in any way at all, were the only ones who did classic “borderline” things. 
So, borderlines who are otherwise healthy, in therapy or supported, people... how do you continue to act on these behaviours knowing entirely well you are acting on borderline impulse? 
This question feels like an attack, I know the fight or flight feeling of borderline, I know how you can get stuck in a cycle of self-destruction. But if you have all the knowledge &amp; stigma at your fingertips...I  just can’t understand attention seeking/continuous/unhealthy relenting to symptoms. 
Does anyone else feel unattached to the borderline label *because* of “loud” or whatever borderlines? Cause I have never personally been called manipulative or gaslighting or “crazy” like many borderlines claim they have been for acting on behaviours.