Idk man. Im 20 and a junior in college trying to figure out life and all that. There’s no and abundance of words I can use to explain how stressful that is but another story different day. I’m getting there somewhat but my social life is nowhere close to what it should be. I realize that and i’m just in the background and i see some good friends have i known and i’m happy to see them happy. Like i’ll see them out partying and i know i’m not in the mood for that bc of my situation i’m in with my life. It makes me really happy to see that they’re so happy having a good time and all that and they made it home safe and all that. Like it makes me happy to my soul to see them happy. Example y’all know how snapchat looks at like a bar whatever. People are having a good ass time lmao. Being so present there I miss nights like that. whatever lol. Seeing that even if they feel the same way they’re living. Bc i damn sure know i wanna live and have some fun but i’m over here trying to “figure it out”. I don’t think it’s bad that i am like that i just think i’m not balancing this well. I play xbox when i have down time and i sleep. But the real question is how do i know if i’m really not in the mood for it? Anyone kinda feel me on that? It kinda makes me feel better that i’m only twenty and i got a lotta years to live but college years really are your prime years people are gonna say no it’s not but i already see the responsibilities that entail after college and i know i’m gonna miss this. But i’m using this time right now to try and make myself better but i’m not really giving myself a chance to test that. I just know i need to get my life figured out more before i can really go out be young and bullshit around.