why is everything so complicated to me? which part of my brain has the complicated?? is it the right brain?

im done im shooting myself in the head but i need the right angle for a non fatal shot that will ultimately improve my life lol 

i just want to live a simple life. thats where all my stupid pretentious "sElF sufFiciEnt CotTage lIfE tEd kaCzyNski huRr duRr" dreams originally sprouted from. but fucking dumb society (corny time) THINK it would because im ignorant of whats really wrong with me,, need to stop thinking on surface level..

my therapist (thats not really a therapist bc we cant afford one) has been fucking useless so far and so has my own mind shit just messes me up even more

psychedelics? nah g too expensive as well

maybe positive thinking will be the key? my brains arent built like that doe. i havent shot myself yet so thats one thing good in my life i guess

hehe family guy funny "please study my brains so others dont have to suffer as i have"

i've always been non religious but at the same time wanting to be religious for all the comfort and meaning it brings and shit. just cant make my brain believe in stuff that i dont believe in

ok yeah fuck god that nigga MUST be fake no one that good of a being would give me dumb fucking geneticS like this

im slowly developing all the same problems both of my parents had and frankly, it is fucking scary

will i too OD on perscriptions at 32 and leave my kid fatherless?

"wow this kid thinks hes so deep haha he just wants attention"

there, i bullied myself before any of yall could. i never open up like this so dont take away my last bits of drunken confidence by saying mean shit thx