does anyone else get filled with intense rage whenever they’re talking to someone and they don’t make eye contact? or when they’re on their phone? for example, i could be trying to show someone something, and they don’t look/or they don’t give the reaction i wanted, and i go insane. or if they take more than a few seconds to look at what i’m showing them. i’ve had this issue since i was a kid. i go from being excited and happy, trying to show my loved one something i think they’ll like. and then when i don’t get the reaction i expected, i just feel so unappreciated. unappreciated to the point where i even have intrusive thoughts about cutting myself or killing my self to get a rise out of them. it just makes me feel so stupid, like i’m just talking to a wall. it makes me wanna say shit like; “why the fuck do i even open my mouth to speak to you? you never, ever fucking listen. you clearly are only thinking of yourself right now. do you even care at all? what the fuck, i thought you loved me. it was all a lie.” it’s completely insane, it makes me feel like a child. i really need to find a way to control my emotions when this happens. somehow, i’m able to control what i say a lot easier when it’s a friend doing this. they won’t give me the reaction i want, and so i’ll just take some space from them and hope that my anger goes away. for partners, however, it’s a lot harder to control what i say for some reason. i’m hoping someone else also feels this way lmao...