I know I know I have my issues. But I’m not a bad person…. I’m truly not this manipulative nasty person people think I am. First of all I have a narc as a mom, and I have created a personality for myself based off my moms criticisms of me. I feel like a piece of garbage, like people look at me as the “crazy girl”. Idk I feel like I’m not allowed to be human, I can’t ever be distressed and if I am I’m “crazy”. My friend who is no longer my friend, never once asked me about my BPD or never checks in on me after I had my baby and was feeling suicidal. Is it me, or has everyone in my life actually just screwed me over? Is this the BPD making me feel like a victim when I’m not solely the victim in my life’s implosions? Or because I have BPD I am susceptible to this mistreatment? I don’t want to feel like a lost cause anymore.