From what I can recollect I’ve always been too expensive to deserve to live, selfish, and need to get a real job. From what I can remember my mother was groomed into marriage by my father. And then they used all sorts of preventative measures to make sure I was never born. I was an accident. I was the reason my mom switched to pro choice after her first pregnancy. My dad became the breadwinner and distant from the house, always working and bitching about finances and giving my mom an allowance. Then I just got used. I developed a very quick vocabulary because of how often my agoraphobic mother talked to me because she didn’t trust the world with her first little girl, as she’s been assaulted her entire life. I became her caretaker and therapist by 3. I learned how to be independent fast. That declined by 6 years old bc mt mom had my brother and became terrified of what he would grow up into. I probably started helping raise my little brother. Then my other brother born 3 years later. I helped my mental Ill mother raise both of them. Then my sister was born and my mom went into psychosis. That event was blocked out of my head entirely. I don’t remember anything about it nor can visualize it. I helped raise the 3 kids I’d bet. Another kid was born. The 4th after me. She had Collic. I had to raise an infant during my teen years because my parents both worked 10 hour shifts at Amazon and left me with a newborn who couldn’t stop crying unless I rocked her to sleep on a ball. We all got a little older and now try to raise each other since our parents divorce. They don’t try anymore. They’re too depressed. And all of the blame has been put onto me because I can’t handle it all or ever wanted to. I’m a legal adult now and confused as to how to get a job when my only outside time ever was school? She never taught me anything besides how to cook for myself and how not to piss myself. She calls me pathetic because I use my autism as an excuse even though she uses her fibromyalgia. I’m spiraling and still raising kids despite my agoraphobia and tokophobia. I have never liked minors and never ever will.