Hi there,

I have suffered with anxiety my whole life (it runs in my family on my mums side).  I have had lifelong OCD, varying degrees of social anxiety that gets intertwined with the OCD (feeding off each other) and high functioning depression. 

I had CBT for my OCD which was really helpful.  I still have the OCD but it's much more manageable than it used to be.  But one thing that has not gone away is my situational anxiety.  Nothing at all helps its (therapy or SSRIs that I tried for the OCD).

I first noticed it in high school (i am 36 now) when reading out loud in class. My heart rate would go through the roof and I would lose my breath as a result and not be able to speak properly.  It has remained ever since.  Mainly for job interviews, work itself, phone (particularly work related but even sometimes non work stuff), and heated debates (even when it may not be a debate but I anticipate it and in confrontations).  Weirdly I manage to do ok in casual face to face sales and talking to random people in public etc. 

But it has been totally debilitating in terms of work.  I never ended up getting into a proper career because of it (the more formal and corporate the work is, the more of this anxiety I have).  I have less of it in more causal work settings but even here, it can pop up.  Because of this problem, I have spent years in and out of casual work and spent years unemployed. 

As mentioned I have had a lot of therapy over the years but nothing has got rid of this problem.  It has become totally automated (a conditioned response).  I have researched and what may help is Propranolol.  But my doctor refuses to give it to me because I have a history of asthma. The asthma I probably grew out of by early teens. But apparently it's still risky because I have this history.

I just wanted to find out from anyone if there is some sort of nootropic that may help instead of the propranolol.  I really want to get my life on track (I already feel like I have totally screwed up) but I have heard of people turning their lives around even later than me. I want to go back to University and do a postgraduate course to get into a proper career rather than floating from low paid casual job to another. That's all doable but there is no point if I still have this problem after I graduate and am unable to put myself forward wholeheartedly for interviews etc and fail them and jobs because of this problem (it is severely debilitating in it's effects).  The heart rate is totally through the roof and the shortness of breath is major as a result.  

Any help and advice would be great.

Cheers