I'm trying. I mean, I'm in therapy, reading books, meditating, taking my pills and still I feel like my needy and weird behavior has pushed everyone I love away from me. Feeling like it’s too late to have friends or a relationship. And I don't blame them, it’s their right. I totally understand but it’s so frustrating. I'm trying to think about the people I haven't met yet so I can have a little bit of hope. Still sometimes it gets hard. Last year someone told me that “you can’t love anyone if you don’t love yourself” and to be honest I think that’s so unfair. So if I can’t love myself I am unworthy of love? Yeah, I wish I could love myself right now but like... That's not a “choice”. Uhh.