I’ve been driving for the last 15 years of my life and have been driving to remote places for work like oil rigs, construction sites, remote camps Etc. 

Everything was fine until one day i was having a very bad day and had just got out of a terrible meeting with a client. 

as i was passing near a skyscraper in the middle of the desert like I’ve done half a million times before, i had a crippling panic attack. I stopped the car and called an ambulance as i thought it was a heart attack. Later when I understood that it was a panic attack, I thought it would be a one time thing and that was that. This happened 8 months ago and to this day i cannot pass by that same location without having a panic attack or at the very least severe anxiety. I am actively avoiding that place and choosing longer routes as to not pass by it.

I am now unable to drive in unfamiliar places and for more than 15 minute trips without getting a panic attack. I went to see a doctor and was on medication (anti depressants and antipsychotics) for four months and even though the full out panic attack was rare, the anxiety and the fear of a panic attack was always there. The meds made my life unbearable so i decided to stop taking them. 

I feel helpless, ashamed and frankly hopeless as I cannot picture a scenario where i can be cured from this plague.

I am at a risk of losing my job, my social life has been damaged and i feel like I’m not too far away to slipping into depression. 

With little hope in my heart and frankly not a small of desperation, all i can say is Help me.