Recently I have had a lot of pain. The guilt, regrets, loss. I tried to take my own life for the first time and over all there has been a lot of stress building up for me. But after all of that I came to a conclusion.

I've learnt not to be so hard on myself. I blame myself too much and it just makes me worse. All I can do is learn to be a better and bigger person. I don't want to be the person I use to be anymore as that person got me to where I am now. I want to be better than that person and become the best version of myself bpd or no bpd. No matter my age, I still have time to sort myself out.

Your mind is who you are and everything you do. Becoming aware of your mistakes and who you are is important. Most people will never find themselfs, as people are constantly changing and learning, its almost impossible to define yourself. And that's okay, life is complex and the mind even more so. But we can all have a goal, and if we reach it we can push it further. I don't know who I am, I am lost in a sea of thoughts and I have only been though a glass fulls worth. But I know my flaws, I know my possitives; as life goes on I will learn more on both sides and I can learn on what I want to change.

I realise now what I need to do and who I want to be. Way I see it is life is a journey, stuff isn't suppose to happen but when stuff goes badly you can learn from it and in the end it makes you better. All this bpd stuff, in the end I know it will help me become a better version of myself once I have past it. And even if I never do then that's okay, as long as I keep pushing forward towards improving myself.  It's like bones, when they brake they end up becoming stronger than before.