My sister split on me two years ago really badly, and it was far from the first time. I finally couldn’t handle it anymore and I told her I love her but I need time. We’ve reconnected recently. She seems like she wants to talk and try to understand where I was coming from. But I don’t know how to explain my perspective to her. 

She is aware she has BPD and is in therapy. But I don’t think she really understands what happened between us in that context. I don’t know how she feels now but at the time she genuinely believed I deeply wronged her. She sent me the most vile text I’ve ever gotten in my life.

I’m scared if I tell her that from my perspective she split on me, she will accuse me of not taking responsibility and trying to blame her. I really don’t blame her (I blame our messed up childhood…). 

What would be the best way to go about explaining this to her? Or is it a bad idea to try explaining it? I love her and I want to make things work with her somehow. I just don’t know what to do.