I desperately want to be part of something. Be in a social circle where I feel at home. Where I can create something with them, learn something, explore. Feel good with the people around me.

But I am so freaking lonely. Most friends have left. The few ones I have don't really care and have left at some point as well, so I can't really trust them. I don't want to be close to my family, I don't have that connection.

So I am once again, alone, sad, depressed, thinking of all the cool things I'd wanna do with people. Seeing people outside spending time in a group, feeling so jealous. It hurts so much.