I don’t do what I am supposed to do (academic), even though I know I have to do it, and I know what the consequences will be if I don’t. My depression is otherwise well managed, I am fine doing anything else but I cannot bring myself to be productive at all. I won’t even try. It’s like there’s something inside of me that’s stopping me from trying. I’ve now dug myself into a major academic hole and my dreams are basically shattered. Yet I still can’t get myself to work on anything. It’s almost like I’m scared of it. I just recently heard of the term self sabotage, but I don’t know if this fits.