i had such a horrible first year. i’ve only made one friend. and i have to leave home AGAIN to go to a place i hate. 

i move back in less than a week and every time i think about it my heart starts to race so fast to the point where it hurts and i start uncontrollably sobbing and the world just feels slow. so i sit down and sob until i fall asleep. i don’t know how to make it stop