My mood swings are so incredibly extreme. Literally, I was over at my friend's house a month ago and I was laughing so hard and having such a fun time, and then I just started sobbing. I just felt a sudden overwhelming sense of depression wash over me and I just started full body sobbing. I had to go home early that night because if it. Or I'll be having fun on my own and the same thing will happen. It's exhausting and it takes me a ton of time to recover from those low lows. Like this week I was happy with life and I was excited for things. I felt great and I was satisfied with myself and I felt like I started gaining control of my mental health. Then, I have an overwhelming afternoon and I'm about to eat a thousand pills and kill myself.  I dont get it. I was doing so fine, why did I want to die? I'm scared of myself because I dont want to die but my emotions are so intense and blinding, I dont know what to do.