Day treatment program still hasn’t gotten back to me but I’m afraid they won’t accept me if they find out I’m not stable and I don’t really know if they will accept me yet. I am switching from olanzapine to Vraylar but am not noticing any improvement. I am also trying to get in contact with peer coaching since that’s probably the only job I can handle and I don’t even have a resume anymore. I felt too paranoid to go jogging today. I’m not looking forward to day treatment since I was hoping I could find a better way to live my life after my friend moves away but guess it’s more of the same for now. Probably in the next month we can move into the new house. I feel like some of my friends are already sensitive seeing the new house because they live in small apartments or group homes. After I got diagnosed I tried many jobs but never lasted long at any of them so I eventually gave up working. I’m really tired. Tbh, I have been dealing with symptoms and mental health instability for almost year now. I also don’t feel as young as before and really want to start a family. Right now I’m obsessing about whether I will be allowed to start day treatment. Time is passing really fast. Idk if I’ll have a bday party this year because my bff is leaving. I don’t really understand it but maybe bad things are happening.