I was, and still am, in a bad place for months now. Anxiety flared up so high and my depression made me so low that I feel so trapped. Thoughts of ending it all are almost my daily companion. Last night, a good friend of mine came to our house. After his work, he paid me a visit when I told him that I am not okay. He's already 31, and I am 22, but that doesn't matter. After eating, we lied down on the bed and just talk about how messed up this life is. I opened to him that I always feel I would die at any moment, and that I'm not seeing myself living past the age of 30. As things got pretty emotional, I asked him to hug me. 

There. Two dudes hugging each other on the bed. I cried on to him while he was hugging me tight. He told me how he wanted me to stick around long enough for him to have children, for me to have children, for me to attend his wedding. Truly, I may not feel okay but at that moment I felt somehow secured. 

Tomorrow is his birthday. I wish for him to have a good and happy life. Angels are real. He, for one, is.