Success story about meds and DBT (I think)

A month ago I felt out of control. Just being around my emotionless spouse felt unbearably painful. I'd have panic attacks every time I came home from work and was greeted by someone who has resented me for years and pretends I barely exist (yet still gave obligatory hugs and a peck hello with noneye contact).

I wanted to somehow mute the pain and the urge to lash out when I split and tend to call her out on her lack of empathy and heartless as I suffer desperately for her attention and affection while being so willing to give mine.

I found medical help and got on an SSRI. It has dulled the sharp blade of anxiety, quelled the panic attacks, and numbed the pain. I now have the strength to be stoic at home. It has helped me to practice DBT and act opposite to my feelings. I haven't brought up any concerns about the relationship in weeks. I haven't asked for an emotional connection or desperately tried to foster one (knowing it wouldn't work). I can practice radical acceptance knowing I haven't experienced a deep emotional connection or physical connection in a very long time and should lower my expectations of the future.

I think I will just go with the flow of this tepid charade and not rock the boat while I work on parenting, my personal health, career, and education. After all, I have value and I do not need fo humiliate myself every day begging for scraps of affection from someone who despises me. All I know is that the next time she needs me, I won't be there. I will be emotionally independent without anyone able to manipulate me.

To those who emotionally suffer each second of the day and loathe the wakeful nightmare of the time normal people sleep, I feel you. I wish you the strength and determination to practice DBT and carve out a new future for yourself.