...and when it pours it leaves you soaking wet in a big puddle of despair! 

I  know, that is super dramatic. I just want to vent...and while I’m not super active on this sub, I do come here for sage advice when I see someone struggling with similar problems as me. 

So I’ll try to keep it quick. 

Covid forced me out of a wonderful job that won’t be coming back soon, this caused a long episode of major depression and high anxiety. My girlfriend couldn’t take anymore of it so she dumped my ass. That really stung me and rocked me to my core. She was my entire life and now she is gone. Because she is gone I can not afford the apartment we lived in, and prices in my city have absolutely skyrocketed. I fell even deeper into depression and became immobile. I pretty much sat on a floor for a week straight staring at a wall - I was completely vacant and stopped taking my meds for that week - I couldn’t be bothered. I’m quite certain this caused an extreme case of vertigo that suddenly hit me, and now I am no longer immobile by choice, but because I can’t stand up and move around for the life of me. I’ve been invited to move home with my parents (at the age of 32) unfortunately I have to sell most of my stuff because their apartment isn’t large enough to store a whole other apartment, which is totally fair.  My life that I have spent years and years creating has all been flushed down the drain in a matter of months and fuck, does that ever hurt.

There is a silver lining though. I get to move home rent free and not worry about the responsibilities of life for a bit. I will start online courses and eventually move back to my home city by the ocean that I have miss so much (I’ve been landlocked for a decade!) I’ll be close to my family that I’ve run away from and neglected and my old friends are excited to have me back. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all... I guess I will just have to wait and see, life does seem to work itself out at times, there’s definitely an ebb and flow to my luck, so i just hope the tide is coming in for me now.  

Thanks for listening, I hope all of you lovely people take good care and treat yourselves well, you deserve it!