Sometimes it clicks in my brain that I give way too much of me to FP and never receive the same back.. but are those things really coming from love? in rEaLiTy I'm so afraid of abandonment that I will take any chance to prove them that I'm perfect. I don't even give them a chance to be "nice" to me back. Second of all if FP started doing the same things back to me I would feel overwhelmed and uncomfortable. It's just toooo much. I need to start taking a deep breath whenever I start thinking about spending all of my money, time, enegry on someone who didn't even ask for it. I don't want to force my kindness on FP and then accusing them of taking advantage of me. So I think a great solution is to stop doing those things and only do it when it comes from love and not fear. I guess.