I talked to this girl (F20) for yeeearrss. We’ve talked for like 8 years since we were little. And I love this girl and she’s so beautiful, the most beautiful, fun, happy, girl I know. Her and I would tease each other back and forth and talk, fight, take long breaks from each other but we keep ending up talking to each other again but we’ve never done anything sexually: I’m well aware that I’m friend zoned but I used to use that as motivation. I would always think if only I had more muscle, if only I made more money,etc. so I would grind hard to get these things for her. We’ll eventually I gave up hope of ever having her in a real relationship and now I’m extremely depressed and can’t find motivation to do anything because she was my motivation, for years. What do I do now? How do I get the motivation back that is gone. She was all I ever had (even though I never had her) I’ve never wanted anything more than her, there’s no car, no house, no party, no person that I want more than her. So a job doesn’t interest me anymore because I don’t need the money personally, it was more of a “getting ready for our family” that’s why I worked. Now I’m useless.