I can't get myself to do anything anymore. I'm going on 22 next month and I haven't been able to hold down a job, stay in college, or even just maintain an actual hobby.

I won't bother with the full background on what got me here exactly, it would be too many words. It's becoming more and more of an issue as I age though, and I don't know what to do about it. I've had two best friends since 2014/2015, and recently they've gotten mad at me because I no longer reach out to them, and don't do anything with them anymore. I just don't know what to tell them. I'm incredibly apologetic and I value/care about them a lot, so I'd like to improve and better myself for them, but I just can't. I'm about to unintentionally break off ties with the only two people that have stuck around and I hate it.

Being in public is the worst. Having to socialize is draining, even with people I love. I'm constantly anxious and tired, and half the time I can't force myself to leave my apartment. I don't like doing anything, and I like myself even less for it.

I scheduled to get back into Psychiatry, and I'm trying to convince myself to give therapy one more shot, even though I honestly don't want to at all. I need to. My only support system, being my parents, are moving across the world in a couple months, and if I'm not able to stand on my own two feet soon, I'm not sure what I'll end up doing.