Sometimes I get into this fucked up state when every little sound seems loud af. A fan sounds like a helicopter, etc. That's one thing, the outside noises. 

Inside my head, every thought is screaming as well though. Usually happens when I'm trying to fall asleep. I'm trying to imagine some kind of conversation, and the people I come up with are loud, yelling. My own thoughts are screaming. It makes me nauseous. 

What's even worse is when it gets combined with this other stupid shit that sometimes happens. Every image in my head is rapidly changing sizes. It feels like what I imagine an LSD trip would be like.

 When it's dark, it's like my sense of my own body is tripping balls. From huge to tiny, changing, growing and shrinking until I can't even see it anymore. I loose sense of how things actually look like in reality. Again, this always happens when I'm falling asleep. During these episodes, I can almost feel my body "floating". Again, it makes me extremly nauseous. 

And to make it even worse, there are the patterns. Sometimes the images in my head appear smooth, like a digital drawing. No shading, just...smooth. Almost cartoon-ish. And suddenly it changes into this screwed up mess, random patterns, like crosses, lines, circles, covering the whole image. Blinking, from smooth to messy. 

When these three things meet up, it's pure hell. I have to turn the light on, stare at my hands to SEE what size they actually are, and focus on my own breathing pattern to hopefully make the screaming go away. It passes after a while, but still...

What the hell is that? Could it just be anxiety? Even though I don't really feel more anxious than usual? Does anyone have this?

Sorry for typos and misspelt words. I can't fucking think today and my hands are shaking.