I’m diagnosed with manic depression, heavy on the depression. For the past two years I had been taking Wellbutrin and it had been working amazingly. So much so that I didn’t think I was depressed anymore and even thought maybe I had just made the whole being depressed thing up just for attention. A couple months ago, I started getting symptoms like dizziness and tinnitus, and I thought maybe it had something to do with the Wellbutrin, so I stopped taking it.

A few weeks went by and I was fine… that was about 2.5-3 months ago. Today I realized I’m depressed again. I’ve been too depressed to open up my credit card apps and pay my bills, too depressed to finish my grad school applications, having loud suicidal thoughts, etc. All in the span of 2 ish months, my credit score dropped 122 points, the deadline is looming for grad applications, and all I can think of is what the hell is the point. 

All because I thought I was “all good” and could stop my meds to relieve my symptoms. Which by the way, are completely unrelated to the Wellbutrin as it turns out. 

I just started again on Wellbutrin today. Wish me luck I guess