I've bounced around so many jobs and every time I've quit it's been validated. They either treat me super badly, under pay me, or straight up not pay me at all for entire hours I worked. 

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No one judged me for leaving those jobs because why would they? No one would be expected to stay at a job where they weren't being paid properly.

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But this one is perfect. I'm paid. I'm given shorter shifts. I have weekends off. And it's a super slow paced job.

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But every morning/night before work I am dreading it. I'm not sleeping as a result of this, I'm too tired to feel hungry so I'm also not eating. I know those two things are adding to my anxiety and just making everything worse. 

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I just want out so badly. But I know I won't be happy unemployed, stressed about money. I just feel like I'll never hold down a job. If I can't hold this one, I'm hopeless.

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Idk. Part of me feels like if I stay at this job I will run myself down to a serious mental breakdown. My boyfriend is already getting tired of me and I've only had this job for a week now, I constantly complain to him and he's at a point where he doesn't know what to tell me anymore. 

&amp;#x200B;

If I leave this job though, I'll spur on a depressive episode and I'll feel like I suck again. 

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I feel hopeless and I know a huge part of me just wants everyone around me to tell me to leave my job so I can do it and feel validated. Even though I know I'll still be unhappy even if everyone supported me leaving.