I'm only recently realising just how huge a trigger that is for me. 

I HATE it and get very irritated when someone makes assumptions about me or what I'm thinking or feeling. Even if it's minor things. Like when someone finds out I'm vegetarian and then they say, "Oooh, you must just despise me for eating meat, right?" and what I really want to say is "NO you fucking presumptuous idiot, I have never been like that in my life, don't impose your fucking prejudices upon me", but all I do is fake laugh and go "Oh, no :) don't worry! :) I totally get ya! :) not judgmental in the least!" (and I bet the other person can feel my sudden tension) and then I'll spend weeks, months, years, with this tiny little grudge against the person because they made an incorrect assumption about me (it's especially  annoying if that assumption is based upon a stupid stereotype), and I'll never *quite* forget it.  *Even though it's not a big deal at all.* Even though I forgive them. 

My boyfriend encounters that quite a lot and I am always amazed by how unfazed he is by it. He laughs and jokes with them about it, throws in a little self-deprecating humour, carries the conversation naturally. Meanwhile I'm seething in the corner on his behalf, thinking "WHAT did you just say to him, you profiler?!". I ask him about it when we're alone, like, "Why did that person say that? That's so annoying of them to assume you're into that..." and he's just like, meh. It's incredible.

But what's worse is having your intentions and feelings and character completely misunderstood by someone you love. It's like a betrayal. I feel alone. I feel like I'm falling. And my increasingly frantic attempts to explain myself and keep reiterating the truth is the most awful feeling. Like it puts me in a spin where I'm just thinking, "No... no, this can't be. The person they see in their mind is not me. It never has been me. They don't know who I am. I have been so vulnerable and they don't know who the fuck I am. What the hell is happening. No... what?! No! This is it, my world is ending, I will never bother again because I will always be unseen." and so forth until it turns into a full-blown panic attack and episode. (This particular occurrence is extremely painful for me because I suffered a lot of emotional abuse and neglect from my mom and grandmother when I had no one else, that was all based on wild assumptions, gossip and outright lies about me, which I have never ever been able to settle.) 

Yeah, I dunno... sorry for the length...

How do you guys feel?