I’m a 19 yo girl doing my freshman year of college in manhattan. I’ve been struggling with GAD/ Panic Disorder for 3 years (diagnosed), but I’ve had the symptoms and tell-tale signs since I was a toddler. I’ve become barely functional. For two years, I’ve only been able to get (most) relief from my mom. I think I’ve had separation anxiety since I was a baby (because of abandonment issues from my dad?— I’ve been extremely close with my mom for my entire life). I lived in NY my whole life, I couldn’t not leave home like this for college. Even with my ex-long term boyfriend and my closest friends with family, Ive had severe panic. I cannot drive anymore. I can’t sleep at my dorm. I barely go to class without my mom being less than 10 minutes away from me just in case. i just want to enjoy my life. I have incredible friends, amazing opportunities. I want to date, have fun, take care of my responsibilities. I’ve been on Lexapro 15mg for 2 years for anxiety and so feel like it hasn’t done a thing for me at all, apart from making me feel sick if I forget to take it for 2 days. I’ve been prescribed Ativan for flights only—like long ones to europe for the summer— but i’ve honestly been taking one now and then that my mom has when I have high stress things to do (like a date, going out with friends) It’s the only thing that gives me relief. I’m about to connect with a new psychiatrist, Im thinking something like Klonopin—that I knew my grandma used to take daily for anxiety— might really help me. Im really afraid that because Im 19 it’s going to be so difficult for anyone to hear me out. Im so done. Im trapped inside this body. I feel so defeated and depressed I’m so scared this is going to last forever. I feel like half of a person— and my life, friends, school, family is amazing apart from this. If I didn’t have this happening to me, I truly feel I would be so successful and happy. Any advice?