TW ADDICTION

I had a weird childhood. My mom was very intense, her moods were up and down. It was hard on me. She was strict in certain ways. Around the age of 17 I was pushed by my parents to be put on drugs, which is when I manipulated doctors into thinking I had adhd (which I believe I actually might have) so that I could get uppers. 

After that, I found Ativan. I was addicted. After that, clonazepam. Once I was hooked on that (thanks to doctors) I became a coke addict. Doing anything I could to get cocaine for free. Trying every drug I could try. I would go anywhere and I would do anything. I wasn’t and still am not scared of anything except losing loved ones. 

But I’m in love with having fun. I’m passionate about it. It’s intense. I always want to have a good time, put my trauma aside and have a good time. I always thought and hoped I would die young but even after my horrible benzo addiction and rehab, I’m still alive. I wanted to live fast and die young.