I feel like the title is pretty self explanatory haha. I feel worse when I have to go and relive and feel everything again and it makes me worse in general. I haven't had a session in months and I'm feeling not okay but in control, and fine with not being too happy or open. I haven't taken the meds the psychiatrist prescribed either because I don't want to be drowsy and an easy target. If keep everything up I can do it myself. The only problem is l'm not sure whether to be honest with them or let them think that the sessions have worked and I feel better in myself. I'm conscious of having things recorded for however many years so reluctant to share however, if I turn up saying how it's bullshit and l'm leaving then that may not look too good either