i’m crying my boyfriend told me he was mad at me because i told something very personal about him to some people and i fucked it all up, he says he’s not angry now but i feel like i deserve to have him break up with me but i’m scared that he will i’m so sorry i’m so so sorry i fucked up just like always. I don’t want to lose him, I don’t want to be alone, I feel so weak.

i don't want to lose him but i deserve it. I've been planning on a surprise for our anniversary and i don't want him to be mad at me but i deserve it. 

am i making this up?

edit: i'm feeling a bit nauseous 