All I want is someone to talk to face to face but for some reason I won't let myself have it. I ended up in the hospital a few weeks ago due to alcohol poisoning and SH and the doctors even recommended therapists to my parents and my parents would've done all the work so I could see one but when they asked me if I wanted to see a therapist I said no, I lied even though talking is all I really want. And now my useless brain forces me to maintain this lie. My parents are good people and I know I could talk to them but I can't for some reason.