I know I am the second choice to everyone in my life but sometimes I will try to tell myself otherwise or I will just forget about it but every time something proves to me that I am not the first choice to even someone like my fiancee my hope for being more is slowly less and less and my depression slowly grows inside of me and I begin to feel like everything I do in life is for nothing and that make I should be alone in the corner of the room for the rest of my life.