Hi all! 

I’ve been in quite some distress the last few weeks. I’ve been diagnosed with BPD last year and just started a very intense therapy 5 weeks ago for 4 days aweek which will last up to 9 months. It’s really really heavy and the past 2/3 weeks I’ve been all over the place: super triggered, mega emotional, I feel really dark and empty and just overall very very displeased with life in general. I’m just constantly revisiting a lot of unresolved trauma and it’s taking it’s toll.

To come to the point. I am in a relationship and my partner is facing a lot of mental health problems as we speak. Showing a lot of signs of depression, stress and overall I just really really feel for him. But it’s also very hard for the both of us to deal with this level of mental health problems, right at the same time. 

Last night he told me that he feels that he cannot give me the level of support I need right now because of his mental health. And that it would maybe be the most rational choice to break up and deal with our mental health seperatly. He did say his feelings and heart 183828282% don’t want this but I feel like he’s just in so much distress that he can’t handle the relationship in his head. We didn’t reach a conclusion and he said he just wanted to make his headspace or thoughts clear so that they dont bottle up. But It triggered my BPD immensly because my first reaction was to run and push him away. I talked about it in therapy today and I realized I need to find a healthy way to grow towards each other instead of pushing him away and making it worse. 

So I guess my question is how do you guys deal with both partners having mental health issues? Do you have any tips? We try to talk alot and it worked at first but lately we both can’t get ‘out of our feelings’