hi! so i got diagnosed with depression and anxiety about 2 years ago, and my doctor very loosely said i could have BPD as i suggested it, and now im actually getting an appointment to be tested for it thursday. since that day 2 years ago, i've been paying attention to my symptoms. i even explained it to my ex gf, and she tried understanding me more because my BPD/behavior was basically controlling our relationship.

my BPD "traits"/all of the symptoms emerged a little after i got into a relationship with my now ex-gf (it was super tough to leave but after like 40 breakups within 3 years, it broke off for good). im guessing because of all the trauma, cheating, lying, she did which made my mind completely FUCKED... BPD, relationship PTSD idk

anyways, its like a checklist with how spot-on everything is considering BPD. when i found out about BPD, i felt so much relief, despite it being the worst thing to ever come into my life. i believe i have genetic predisposition to BPD and that trauma from my relationship "woke" it up??

my worry/TLDR: my symtpoms have since mellowed out ever since our relationship ended... and since im getting tested for BPD this thursday, i feel like an asshole/really anxious/upset bc theyre nearly gone now.

QUESTION: has your BPD mainly/only showed in relationships? mine practically emerged from mine

i guess its good im getting tested anyways to get help in general, and it can help with my future relationship too. im just hoping i get an answer and since BPD (most likely) has been controlling my life for a while, it'd be upsetting to say the least, if it wasnt BPD all along. i know BPD can get confused for quite a bit of other things, but i know how certain i am with this