I [F31] have been running from my diagnosis of BPD for over ten years. I kept telling myself I was fine, and that my behavior was just natural reactions to stress, or unfortunate side effects of substance abuse that Ive fallen into at different times in my teens and 20’s. 

I cannot run anymore, I have finally admitted to myself that I am not functional and am ruining my life and making things extremely difficult for people who care about me. 

Where do I begin?