Hi everyone, I've had issues with my mental health on and off for the last 6/7 years and after a recent crisis, I've been diagnosed with BPD. I checked over the criteria and I tick every single box. In some ways it's a relief to know what's going on with me but at the same time I'm really struggling coming to terms with the complexity of this condition and the guilt surrounding the way I treat those closest to me. My partner especially has had the worst of me over the past few weeks when I've been having my crisis.

I'm really keen to get a better understanding for myself and also become more open with those closest to me. Currently only my partner and professionals know and I'm terrified at how to approach anyone else with the topic. Does anyone have any tips or advice on how to let those closest to me know? I've always been a very private individual so the idea of discussing it with others freaks me out. 

I was also wondering is there any 'general' advice anyone can offer? Any books or media that may help me understand myself/ condition better? Or anything to help my partner understand better what I need from him as I find it hard to vocalise?