This combination has literally destroyed my life. I haven't been able to work in long time, other then being a stay home mom for last 8 years. I'm so isolated. I'm so lonely. It hurts. I wish I had a friend to come go for a walk with me. I'm married but he doesn't understand fully my emotions. I wish I had a female friend. Women get each other. 
Today I hurt my knee. It's bruised badly. I haven't hurt myself in a long time. Today was a hard day. I can't take it anymore.