I’m not sure if anyone else feels this way but I love being manic. It’s the only time experience any kind of emotion, it drives my creativity, and I get so much work done. Don’t give me wrong the downsides are huge downsides. Like I asexual sex-repulsed but when manic I have a really strong sex drive and I tend to cheat on partners. My delusions and hallucinations I always have get worse. My food repulsion gets really bad and I don’t eat for days. But honestly I’ll take the negative symptoms over not being manic.