The thing about being a self-aware borderline is that you’re a living contradiction. It’s like It’s like “so, I’m completely aware of how irrational and clingy and stupid i sound and i know you don’t actually hate me, bUT DO YOU HATE ME?” Or “yes, this was a very minor issue and i shouldn’t really be angry about bUT IM GONNA PUNCH A WALL BC RAGE” And I think, in a way, being self-aware makes it very hard to talk about because you know how irrational you’re being and you know how other people will think you’re weird or wrong or unstable and it sucks.