Hey I just turned 25 in April and I can’t shake the terrible feeling that my life is over and I’ll never get to be the person that I want to be. Let me give you some back ground. Growing up I was always a tough high achieving kid played sports was always one of the top players on the team. My dream back then was to be a navy seal lol (still in away is today). I never had issues making friends even though we switch school a lot. Even my dad who is someone that doesn’t give out approval very often said I would be something in life. It was all looking good until I turned 15 my freshman year of highschool I started having terrible stomach pain and stomach issues also I couldn’t get my mind to slow down at all. I ended up dropping out of highschool and going homeschool little did I know that was the start of 10 painful hell filled years. I could sit in class due to embarrassing stomach issues so I just spent my days alone all day in HS doing school work by myself I was never around people my own age except maybe a handful of time throughout hs. I started becoming depressed and all I could think about was how weird I am and how I’m missing out on my youth. I saw a lot of therapist during hs and ended up being Diagnosed with OCD and depression. Between all this issues I was in constant distress. I was told to get on medication but I refused because I knew if I did get on medication my dream of being in the military would be over due to the rules of the military not allowing people that have been on meds like that to join. So I survived through highschool and I got into college only to drop out during the first semester. The OCD  flared up majorly and made my life hell. Since then I thought about suicided most days. I never went back to college I’ve never had friends I never got to be normal. Now I’m 25 with no degree very little work experience and I feel like finally it’s time to let that guy that I wanted to be so badly go. All I wanted was to be young and have friends and experience life and join the military but it never happened for me. Every time I tried something this issues came up and I failed because of them. I went from a good looking tough dude that was always having fun. To a guy that has spent ten years in a room by himself that extremely soft and has panic attacks still bad ocd and still can’t sit in a room full of people due to my stomach issues. Also I have really bad deep wrinkles and most people think I’m in my thirties so that definitely doesn’t help lol. Sorry for the huge rant. I guess I have a few questions 

1. Do you think someone at 25 can still experience being young like parties going around goofing off etc. 
2. is there a point in trying to be someone in life after ten years of embarrassment and dysfunction.