This has always been a problem for me. Ever since I was little I noticed that my friends would have that one special friend and they would do everything Together. Sadly my special friend’s special friend wasn’t me. 
Boyfriends and girlfriends seem to come easier to all the people around me like they break up or find somebody new or they keep breaking up and getting back together. I’m also been so jealous of people who are just able to get bf/gf at all.
I’m done the self love thing first and it’s eating away at me. I’ve always loved myself “ in a sense “ but it makes me really depressed to think that I’m this great girl and everybody calling me beautiful and yet I haven’t found someone.
I’m not gonna say that I haven’t had guys tryna talk to me but I knew deep down that they weren’t the one. I gave this dude my first in everything expect penetration and we have good convos but I knew that I didn’t like him and my heart wasn’t racing like past crushes. 
Everybody around me is with someone. They either left me because of their bf/gf or they just post about their fun lives all the time. I just want a friend at this point to fully trust cuz it gets tiring being the only one to depend on