Nobody's perfect but a whole fuck tonne of people are better than me. 

I'm trying to just accept it, that I'm not beautiful, that I'm not pretty, that I look like a garbage bag. 

I just want to go back to when I thought I looked good. It took years of people telling me they thought I was beautiful to get me to believe it, but it's been so long now and I can see it for myself how ugly I am. 

I want to go back to being delusional. I want to go back to pretend.