Hey guys, im here beacause i want to share my life experience with y'all. Before i start im almost 17, im not english so excuse my mistakes. Anyways, i had a great childhood like really good and since im 14-15 i was getter depressed, more and more by my family and people around me in general. I was bullied, my mother wasn't as  nice as she used to be till im 13, and she started to insult me really truly with all her anger, every single small mistake i did she was almost hitting me and i just dont know why. Evertime something happened and i tried to explaim myself i was "lying". I just don't get it. My family separated into 2 parts beacause of fucking bullshit my grandma went to my aunt who had cancer and started to say things like "i hope cancer will eat you" like wtf man this isn't what u should do to your family. And there's the conclusion, i literally get 0 help and i want to kms. But i also feel like i can't cause it would be kinda "pussy" from me? Idk how to explain this. Im really motivated sometimes like for workout and playing guitar but every time i just see my mom, walk next to her or think of he rim just remembering how she treats me and stuff. What should i do?