I don't look good or feel good and of course, my sister's fucking boyfriend has to come round which now means I am stuck in my bedroom because of my anxiety. she didn't even tell me he was coming and then I saw him and I'm just so angry rn because it is not fair I don't want people coming to the one place that I don't feel scared in, my own home. then my parents have to go and say embarrassing stuff to me. lately, I haven't been okay with my body or how I look, it just doesn't feel like me and I'm having more showers because I feel dirty and not me. then people are saying don't think about what others think, I'm not, I mean I am but not about this, I want myself to think I look good. I'm just angry and upset and my emotions haven't been right because of this stupid hormone disorder. I can't go anywhere apart from my bedroom because I have no friends anymore and I can't go to local places because that scars me a lot so I'm stuck and trapped. the one thing I can ask for is to not trap me in the one place I have left. hell, even I hate it here sometimes tho. 

Jen x