Apologies in advance for the length. 

So, I don’t know how other people experience their fp relationships but I find mine can change rapidly from someone being my fp to me resenting them and hiding from them. I have spent the last 2 1/2 years basically being my own fp. I spend most of my time outside of work on my own and rarely see friends, I holiday alone, I go out and enjoy myself on my own and honestly, it’s been great! I can’t abandon myself and although their are days I wish I could because I hate myself, in that time I have become very comfortable in my own body. I recently met a girl and we instantly hit it off and became best friends, it was like we’d known each other for years. She is now my fp and I talk to her about everything. She listens, she tries to understand and best of all, she validates my fears but also calms me down when I react too intensely to things. She’s been an absolute godsend but feelings started developing and we actually started seeing each other, it’s been amazing but I know full well I was falling way too hard. She’s been telling me how incredible I am and how she’s never been so happy, comfortable and content but she just didn’t seem as into it. We spoke about it and she admitted that she didn’t know why but she was just unsure about it. All in all, she met someone else and she thinks she wants to see if it could be anything so she asked to put us on hold. I rejected the offer and ended things completely. She replied with a huge message of apology and reassurance but also left the below.

“I have the same love to give but we’re both givers, and although the outcome would be powerful as fuck. 
We’re meant for takers, who need that love to receive. 
We’re two plus magnets. 
We need to find our minus’”

I’m curious to how you would all feel receiving this. I personally think although I am a giver, I also need a giver because I need that constant stream of reassurance. I’ve been with takers and the fear of them leaving is too much because I always feel like they aren’t as into it as I am. Reading the above it makes so much sense and it’s left me feeling so helpless, am I overthinking or would you too feel so helpless having someone make such a logical statement?

Undiagnosed - Just completed a 6 week course with a therapist and they have now put me on a year long course for depression as my symptoms got worse throughout the 6 weeks of therapy. I think bpd is a perfect match but this is the first time I’ve ever approached a professional and I know full well I need to be more honest about things.