I’m having a panic attack as I type this. Or rather, the remnants of one. I did something I know I shouldn’t - I looked at my FP’s(ex) social media thus inducing a panic attack. 
It always does. I’ve had them while checking social media for 5 years now. I try to not look anymore and somewhat succeed at this. But today I gave in. 
I assume, but don’t know, the panic is induced by my inability to accept it’s over, to let go and to go through the normal grieving process. Maybe it’s induced by feelings of inadequacy. Maybe all the above and more. As I say I’m not entirely sure. 
Once I have the panic attack I try to think my way out of it. I go over whatever it is that has upset me to infinite detail, multiple times. Trying to logically &amp; intellectually think my way out of it. My therapist says this is effectively a pointless exercise. Rather I should accept the feeling of panic and concentrate on being mindful of what’s happening to me physically. Be mindful of my feelings but don’t analyze or overthink them. I’ve yet to master this. To be perfectly honest I’ve yet to implement it even once. I can’t seem to help myself from trying to work my way out of it. 
Once the panic subsides I know the subsequent depression and hopelessness will kick in. Whatever enjoyable things I was hoping to do this weekend already seem utterly pointless. I’ll be trapped with my thoughts continually trying to analyze everything with a fine tooth comb. I feel as though I’m a useless, horrible, inadequate person living a pointless existence with nothing to hope for.

TL;DR Checked social media of FP(ex), have panic attacks, feel awful afterwards.