Hey there,  
I'm struggling since a few years with... well, I don't really know. The first time I really noticed that something is wrong was when I slided into a depression which turned over time into a bipolar disorder (manic depression ?) that lasted for a few weeks I think. I can say today that this were the worst weeks I had in my life (2 days **super** happy, 3 days **super** sad). I don't think that I was really well before and neither I am now, but somehow I "keep floating".   
Quite well so, actually. So sometimes I forget that something is wrong and I feel quite normal, except that I constantly feel that my emotions are very dull towards the inside.   
I avoided seeking help until now because I did not want to admit that I have a problem I have absolutely no clue about. And this still stresses me. I REALLY don't like that.  
So yesterday I again had some kind of trigger which threw me all the way back. So I'm sitting here with a stiff neck, stressed and don't really know who I should talk to and at the same time I'm afraid that the condition is getting worse and I somehow slide into a bad mental state without noticing it. 

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My question is... how do I put this ? It took me ages to write this up so how should I tell someone that me, a healthy, seemingly happy person feels completely f\*d up inside ? And who exactly do I talk to ? My doctor ?  
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I don't feel particularly sad, nor happy, nor angry, ... Just really bad without being able to describe it any better.  
Sometimes I feel "maybe it's just a bad day" but then, like now, it is a too well-known feeling for me and it is triggered to easily that it's just a bad day. Plus additionally I notice several "minor" things like general tiredness, low motivation of which I know that it was different some time ago.  
Thanks for reading :)  
(country is germany if that's of any help)