I'm doing everything right. I cook nutritious meals, I workout most days of the week although I've only went once the past week. I cut my hair, shave myself, have perfume, and basically make myself feel good. I try to clean as well as possible. I eat vitamin D, vitamin B12, and vitamin C.

I'm lacking in friends though. I feel so insanely lonely. I only have very few people I can call by phone but these are family. I have no friends at 20 years old. I'm an alcoholic to drown out these feelings.

Everything feels hard the past week. I've eaten out more too just to get some human contact. I've not cleaned, I've not worked very good, I've not went to any of my classes.

What can I do? I don't want to get depressed again. I feel like I'm on the edge of it and one wrong move can put me back in that darkness.