Growing up my parents always yelled at each other and seemed to hate each other. My father was verbally abusive, and my mother dealt with it by parentifying me. She could be moody and give me the cold shoulder randomly and I dealt with it be being as charming, comforting, and entertaining as I could be.

My GF and I have been dating for a year and a half and just had our first fight. We resolved it and talked it out but I still feel so anxious. I'm afraid if I don't be cute and charming all the time she'll stop loving me and be angry at me.

We have a weekend trip planned for memorial day (we're both vaccinated) and it'll be our first time spending that much time together. I'm afraid I'll screw it up. I'll run out of things to talk about. I'll ruin it some way. She's been really looking forward to it.

I know my anxiety is lying to me and making me see things that aren't there, and make dumb assumptions based on innocent words or gestures. I know it's not real, but it feels real. 

Does anyone have any advice?