So i had a farewell party the day before and I was really happy to be going but when i reached there and saw all the people my social anxiety rose. There were around 150 - 200 people. I was so nervous becuase i had never been in a party like this big.

I wanted to do something i wanted to have fun but my social anxiety said otherwise. After 3 hours of the party i went into depression IN THE PARTY. I started doubting what i was doing. And all my other friends were having fun too. I was doubting my personality and shit. 

I regret not doing anything that day now for all i know of this could be my last actual party with these friends..