Long story short, I’ve been battling with severe mental illness since the age of 13. I’m 24 now, and I’m still no further along than I was a few years ago. I wasn’t able to get help until the age of 19, and since then, I’ve been through countless therapists and doctors and absolutely nothing has helped. I’ve had hope and have been put on so many different medications I can’t even keep track. Eventually, I got put in the psych ward after an attempt, and they diagnosed me with Major Depressive Disorder. I come to find out that everyone in that psych ward was diagnosed with MDD, so I knew it had to be deeper than that, as the medication they gave me did absolutely nothing for me, and in many ways, made my issues worse. I sought out help from a psych and got diagnosed with Bipolar Type II. Once again, I get put on meds and continue therapy and doing steps like eating right and exercising, etc. 

Nothing is helping.

Eventually, I end up back at the hospital. A social worker comes to talk to me and I explain my issues and he tells me it’s likely I have BPD, but after all this research, I can’t find anybody who treats this illness. I am beyond exhausted and frustrated and fed up that I have to put my life on hold basically because these doctors don’t know what they are doing.

I’m worried I will never figure it out and it sucks watching your best years just get evaporated right before you eyes despite trying to get help for over a decade.