today was my English final and i got so overwhelmed i ended up having a panic attack tight there at the desk.the tutor who ran the room i was taking it in (whom i love) came over and asked if i was okay. i said "imsosorryijustneedtogotothebathroomplease" rushed out of the room and spent 25 minuets sobbing, completely shaking and drenched in tears, in the stairwell. i was taking it in an alternate study room, and she came out to check on me and i just ended up crying again. i felt so stupid and awful.

because of my official diagnosis and my mental health history, my final was waived, but i still feel like shit.

i love the books we read in class. i remember reading most of them way before this year. i own well worn copies of all of them. but i still couldnt do the fucking test.

i hate myself so much