Anyone else struggle on/around their bday? It tends to happen to me every single year, though this year will be the most physically alone I’ve been, I’ve lost pretty much everyone around me except for my boyfriend who I live with, but I may just want to be completely alone today to avoid any fights or him seeing me because I just want to cry all day. I have been through a lot, survived two suicide attempts and it’s hard to think about as my suicidal ideation never really leaves. This birthday I feel the most disconnected to reality than I ever have. It’s easier to focus on the negative because it brings me comfort, in a sense. It’s hard to be positive because it feels forced and fake, but I’ve been trying to be self aware and I’m trying really hard to just get past today. As much as I’m trying to ignore the fact that it is my bday, it’s quite hard and lonely. I was able to get up today and shower, I’m just not sure what I should do. Nothing that requires going outdoors as I’ve been really depressed. Any ideas or suggestions? My typical days are spent in bed, except for when I need to make my boyfriend lunch. I don’t necessarily want to do the same today because that seems sad. I would appreciate anything