I recognize that the friendship was toxic to begin with and I managed to avoid the most serious consequences of the betrayal. However, I feel like I can’t confide in people or be my true self around them anymore, so I can’t form meaningful relationships. I also feel like if i’m badly treated, my options are to either ignore it, and thus accept it in a way, or to retaliate and make myself look bad. There’s no winning either way. I find that I have to keep myself constantly stimulated in order to avoid these thoughts.