I reacted out of emotion and let go of the most incredible guy I've ever met. I've apologized (a month later because of pride and fear of crawling back) and we're okay...but I just want to start over again.. however, I don't think he's going to come back.. 

I get EXTREMELY anxious about uncertainty, abandonment, and rejection and the anxiety is just eating me alive. I can't do homework, I can't sit at my desk at work and be productive. I just want to be home,.. 

I'm just sitting at my desk about to cry because I feel like a crazy person, I feel desperate because I can't handle the loss.