I have BPD. Or at least still have BPD traits. With a lot of continuous effort, I feel myself improving everyday. It’s a struggle but I haven’t been happier. 

Now my friend, who I’ll call Jenny, might also have BPD. She was diagnosed with PMDD, and a pre-diagnosis of bipolar disorder. She hasn’t sought help, no matter how much we all tell her to. 

Jenny is great when she’s not selfish. It’s her biggest issues honestly. I feel like she’s a classic BPD (think, sadly, of Alex from Fatal Attraction) while I’m more of a quiet BPD. 

Yesterday she got mad and said she hated everyone. Today the cops got called on her. All my other friends now dislike her, and I completely see why; I’m not sure of how much I like her rn. But they brought her being borderline, and I defended the disorder (they know I am too) and said that it’s a spectrum. 

Of course there’s gonna be very selfish people who has it. In fact I’m sure all of us are a bit too selfish at times. But there’s a difference between realizing the flaw, and trying to improve, then just continue down the same, hurtful path. 

I have a lot of sympathy for Jenny. I have never had the cops called on me due to the quiet aspect, but I know how done with life you can feel. She and her bf are a question mark of whether they’re still together. I can’t help but worry. I don’t want her to hurt herself, but I don’t want to repeat my own patterns of putting someone else’s needs before mine. 

TL;DR I do love Jenny, but it’s getting to a point where it’s unhealthy for me. What can I do?