I met a guy this week... Via text and the first date it was great, I really liked the fact that we could talk about deep topics together. We got intimate pretty fast, like on our first date we cuddled, kissed etc even tho no sex.

 So we met 7 days ago, and I know that we are moving really fast, but I don't really care bc I just want to enjoy myself. But I have a problem recently, thst I tend to really repress myself, I'm so insecure of myself that Im afraid to talk with him. But in our first date it wasn't like this at all, while now I think I'm afraid of being intimate with him. So I tend to talk less bc I'm maybe trying to resist the relationship. At the same time I wish I could spend all my time with him.

I feel really sorry bc I really want to talk with him but I feel stuck! I think the reason why I don't do it is because, as the relationship progressed, I feel even afraid of being connected with him. I'm afraid that he will judge me for everything, even tho he never ever judged how I talked and so on...

I wish I was a normal person I want to act like our first date. Yes I was nervous but at least I was responsive, while these past days I feel like I just can't speak, I don't have the courage!