I have been having trouble taking my nighttime meds which are a combo of lithium and some Antipsychotics.  I have missed probably 4-5 doses in about twelve days.

My thoughts have remained clear, but today I had an odd thought.  I thought that my Psychiatrist was trying to control me with my medication.  That he might work for someone or something and they are keeping me controlled by pushing down my potential .

I know the thought is weird and paranoid.  Yet, sitting here, I can't shake the thought. I feel like I am on to something.  I can't fully believe it though because I did take my medications tonight.  If I truly believed he had ulterior motives, I wouldn't have taken them tonight, right?

Has anyone had  dichotomous thoughts like this, where you fully believe something even though you know it is ludicrous?