I just met this guy last weekend. We hit it off right away, we connect in so many ways, we’re going through the same situation right now. We’re both homeless. I have a car though and he just moves around all the time. I can open up to him so much and it’s just insane how much we relate and connect. And from the very beginning the attraction and vibes were there. They were strong. We finally got together last night. Ever since literally all I’m thinking of is him. The problem with me is once I start to like someone, I obsess over them immediately. There’s no gradual, slow baby steps with me. I jump right in and that’s not always a good thing. He uses so much more than me, and I can see that drugs are taking over.. so I always bring him dinner and water, blanket, socks, whatever he needs. If he needed money for a fix I’d give him it, because I understand how hard it is to just quit. The thing is.. he doesnt ask me for anything. He doesn’t abuse my kindness. He had like $20 to his name and tried to give it to me for gas money. Like wow, even though he has nothing. I’m not flat broke thankfully, and I have a job so I got a steady income. This man has to hustle for his money, whatever he has to do. Yet he is always trying to give me money. He picked a bunch of lychee fruit for me and I thought that was the sweetest thing a guy has ever done. He had to climb this big ass tree to get this fruit but he did it for me because he knows it’s my favorite. I kept joking like is this a dream? Are you an angel? 

Anyway, I found out from someone else that he’s wanted for a couple assault charges. A “normal” person would back away but I just fell harder. He’s got a temper, he sometimes sees things, and is an addict.. but I feel like I can relate with that and somehow help him. I look at him and see so much potential. People fear him, think he’s crazy, I feel safe with him. He told me he will stay up all night and look out for me while I sleep. He’s been out on these streets longer than I have and he said he’s worried for me. Last night he shared some poetry  with me straight from the heart. He just came up with it and I swear I wish I was recording. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. He walks on foot to my job just to see me. I have never been with someone that’s as crazy about me as I am about them. 

I just wanted to share this because.. I believe this man came into my life for a reason. After not being with anyone for over a year, I haven’t actually had feelings for anyone like this in a while. It’s just sometimes I can be blinded by these overpowering emotions. Like is this really good for me or is it just me being lonely and acting impulsively like I always do? Or is this real? Who knows.. all I know is it’s crazy how he’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a man. Despite his downfalls and mistakes, he is an amazing person and this encounter has made me start to believe in fate again.