I had an unhappy childhood because of bullying. I was physically and sexually abused by my peers and teachers. Combined with the fact that I have ASD, I feel like I'm a broken shell of human being. 

What kind of resources are there for people like me who have been abused so badly we can't even live our lives? I am so envious of people who can function freely in society without fear. I feel like fear rules my life. Humans scare me, yet I am also incredibly lonely.

Basically my personality and mental health is a wreck. And I don't know how to fix it. Trying to get help has been like pulling teeth.

If I sustained a head injury and forget everything that had happened to me, that would be an improvement as far as I'm concerned.