I've never been sexually abused, my parents hit me with the belt maybe twelve times ever, and the only fear I felt was when they yelled at me for lashing out. 

I did move often, but I wasn't a military kid, we were poor but I never had any food issues because my parents worked hard. I guess what caused my BPD the most was my lack of identity because I'm an immigrant who is told constantly that I don't belong here.

Otherwise, the event that hurt me the most was a girl I only knew for seven months leaving me in seventh grade. Not even as a little kid, this happened in middle school.

Yet, when I talk about it, I start bawling like how parents do when they talk about their dead children. Why does it hurt so much? Why can't I make any friends and why does everyone hate me before they even meet me?