A depressive episode is in the makes right now. I feel it. I'm running to my room to cry throughout the day. I'm absent from conversations. I can't sleep. Nausea, dizziness, etc. The works. 
The country I'm currently in doesn't believe in mental illness, I've no way of getting the help I need.

I know what will help. I know what will fix it. Reaching out to FP. I speak with FP once a fortnight. I've been working hard to be independent of them, but life has been falling apart terribly the past few weeks. 
FP will know what to say, what to do. But then my months of progress goes down the drain. 

My therapist is in another country right now (i had to leave suddenly). I see no way out. I don't know what to do. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. I'm drowning, inconsolable and dejected. FP is my drug. Do I run back to them?