I have been in therapy 4 times, my fourth therapist is the one that finally diagnosed me with BPD (among bipolar and GAD)

At first I was really happy and excited to finally find out exactly what I had and being able to explain my behaviors and feelings, but most importantly knowing I could do something to change that.

I liked my psychologist at first, and she also asked me to go to a psychiatrist who works with her and he is really good too.

Lately I’ve been feeling so bad before therapy I just really don’t want to go anymore, I don’t like her (psychologist) and sometimes she just seems so annoying to me. I don’t know if I’m making any progress but I say what she wants to hear so I can end therapy sooner.

Also it is quite expensive and my parents help with that, but still I feel it’s just a waste of money and I really am not improving at all. And the psychiatrist is twice as expensive (or more).

I really want to improve but I get in such a bad mood before therapy and I suffer throughout the whole session. Also I can’t just tell my parents I’m quitting because now that would be wasting all that money.

I really don’t know what to do ):

Edit: I’ve been in therapy for 7 months