I am alone in the dark. No family. No friends. I know I am a good person. As a child I would make bday cards for everyone.  I was the one who remembered everyone's bday. I got good grades. But I was still abused. And I don't know why. I was the only girl in a house of boys and men. I was a foster child, 1 of 4 foster kids. The youngest.  I was sexually abused and I guess that made everyone else dislike me. I was noticeably isolated. Adults and children in this family hated me.  I have no idea what I did so wrong. 
32 years old now and I still struggle because of this. 
When children are asked what they want to be when they grow up,  you expect the typical doctor, firefighter, astronaut. For me ,I wanted to be a mom.  I figured I could create my own family. Where I'd be loved and valued.  I have a child who I love so much!! And I feel awful because this is not how I wanted my life to be and definitely not my child's life to be. It's just us. Literally. The person I love wouldn't even cry if I died. I just feel worthless. Discarded.