I had a really good relationship with my ex boss. He was my mentor while I worked for him as an intern. He really admired me and said all these great things about me, saying I was the best intern he ever had and how he saw himself as my “pseudo dad.” He and I stayed really close friends after the internship ended. I have called him every week for over three years, talking for more than three hours a week. I developed bipolar disorder about two years ago. I really struggled but I kept most of it to myself. He is very Christian so he doesn’t really understand mental illness, as he’s never experienced it with any of his family members. Back in June I got really manic and thought my family was out to get me, so I told my ex boss about this. He told me I should go to the doctor. I got really upset at him and hung up on him. He tried to call me like 10 times. He was really worried about me but I ignored him because I was so upset. Later that night I tried to kill myself. When I was in the hospital I called him and told him off. I was still really manic. My mom told me that he called her and that he was crying because he was so upset. He is the nicest man I have ever met, and I treated him so badly while I was psychotic. We still talk today but it’s a little different. I feel like an embarrassment. I really never want to talk to him again because of how ashamed I am of my actions. He cares about me still, but we will never be able to go back to the relationship that we had before my manic episode. I don’t know what to do. I am so ashamed. I feel so terrible. He invited me over to a family dinner in December, but I am too ashamed to see him face to face.