Ever get so fucking angry you can’t be round anyone you destroy multiple relationships by a few works and then everyone’s trying to be nice to you you’re so fucking angry you can’t cope round anyone then all of a sudden abandonment issues kick in but you pushed everyone away so either way you’re entirely alone then you have to apologise for a mood you cannot control and it’s a never ending cycle of distractions and being horrible then apologising and it’s exhausting and you realise your life is being lived by preparing to handle your next mood and that’s no mood to live so you get extremely suicidal the. You wait for that mood to pass cause you have family you love and care for and don’t want to leave then it hits you.  Every second of my life is preventing my mental health from doing something stupid. Realising you’re a robot and not even human and just lay there each night begging to not wake up. Same