I'm 26 now. I never had any romantic (let alone sexual) relationships in my life. I guess I'm just too shy and socially awkward. I never even  managed to get a date. 

Anyway   I'm pretty sure that loneliness is what triggered my depression. In fact I can pinpoint exactly what triggered my most recent depressive episode. A certain incident made me want to kill myself:

At christmas my friend introduced me to his new gf. It was my first time meeting a trans person and it was even better than what I expected. She was so cute, and the way her voice still sounded like a dude sometimes turned me on a bit (don't judge me I'm being honest here). I couldn't help but feeling jealous.  Why does HE have all I ever wanted? I'm sad because I know I will never meet a woman who will love me, and there's even less chance that it will be a cute trans woman like my friend met. Why even live?