Since a few months my depression been hitting like really really hard, I can't get out of bed, or i just wake up, feed my cat and return, can't do shit about cleaning my appartement. If I go out it's because I've got an appointment or I'm randomly motivated by something. Tomorrow morning my family coming pick me up to see my grandma for the weekend, I managed to go wash some clothes but I can't clean up, it's too hard, if I'm not distracting myself from reality I feel in pain. They gonna come and I'm like hopping soo much they dont gonna take a break at my place or like want to go to the bathroom. I don't want them to see how pathetic I've become because of my mental health, if feel so ashamed I know they gonna feel sad because of me. 
Only my sister know how bad my depression is, I'm already a disappointment but I don't wanna be one even more