this disorder exhausts me. i met someone roughly 6 weeks ago and already have feelings for him. he’s still hung up on his ex and talks about it regularly. he’s emotionally unavailable. why can’t i accept that it’s never gonna work and move on? why did i already catch feelings for him in such a short time? 

i know it doesn’t help but im so angry that i have bpd. im angry at all the people that traumatised me as a child and probably are the reason i have bpd. i can’t stop being angry and it’s really exhausting, i try to accept it but when it makes my life so incredibly difficult it feels impossible to accept it. i’m so sick of feeling like this.