TW * mention of death. 

I am coming to terms with the fact I might suffer from anxiety? Not sure if I have the signs, I am trying to understand what I am feeling and I’m hoping someone with experience might be able to help me. This is new territory to me, I am 30 years old. My anxiety is around the fear of dying. I am healthy, I am very “functioning” and lead a very normal and blessed life. 

However, sometimes when I try to sleep I can’t turn my brain off. I start thinking about death and the nothingness and get scared. It can upset me so much to the point I start crying. This has been happening on and off for at-least 3 years. I’m tired of this occurring, it happens maybe a few times a month? This past month has been even harder since my dog died at a young age through vet negligence. I’ve had a hard time coping with that. 

I’ve had about 4 panic attacks in my life from what I recall….well what I call panic attacks i.e crying, hyperventilating, hot flashes , tingling sensations on my face. These were brought upon arguments with my spouse, fear when I thought I needed surgery on an injury and grief after my dog died. I am hesitant to talk to someone because i don’t see what they can do for me? Death is an inevitable part of life. So how can someone take my fear away? 

Basically, does this sound like anxiety? Do these type of things progress and get worse? If I choose to speak with someone…who am I looking for? I live in a smaller town and I don’t know if I should be looking for a counsellor or a therapist? I don’t even know the difference. This isn’t something my family or my spouses has dealt with before so I really just need a starting point of where to begin. Thank you for taking the time to read my post.