I've known him for 2 years, and things became romantic in November. I was so happy, it was something I'd wanted for awhile. He would text me throughout the day. He wanted to see me all the time. He was being affectionate. He wasn't trying to have sex with me which was great, it was cool to be on the same page with someone about that and we wanted to take our time before taking that step. I didn't want to do it until I felt fairly certain he wasn't going to break my heart anyway. 

One night in March after a few drinks it happened. We hadn't even put a label on our relationship or said it was official, but in the moment I was like "what the hell it's been about 5 months, he probably isn't going anywhere". I actually did have a lot of anxiety about him leaving and hurting me from day one, though. We hadn't put a label on things or said we were official either, and that was something that had been on the back of my mind. The next time I saw him was a week later. Got dinner, went to the park, went back to his place and watched some movies. Since we had sex before, I thought he would be interested in doing it again. But no, after the second movie he told me he was ready to go to bed and I should head home. So then I was convinced something was wrong. I wasn't yelling or being demeaning or anything, but I got upset and started crying. He thought I was just mad he wouldn't have sex with me. It was this action (or rather, inaction) feeding into the anxiety I already had, not just "ugh why isn't he putting his dick in me?" He said we'd had a good day together and he didn't understand why I was upset. He practically pushed me out the door. I told him I wanted to talk more because I wanted to try to explain myself better, but he said we'd talk later.

He started being really distant after that and I was paranoid to the extreme he's going to leave. Don't hear anything for awhile, then I sent some texts over a few days - first I apologized for what happened that night, but he didn't respond. Next day I asked if things were okay between us, he said yes, but nothing was changing. A couple days after that I asked him if he wanted to get together and he said he wasn't feeling well. I felt like that was just a cheap excuse to not hang out with me, and I told him the way he was being distant and not talking to me was really stressing me out. He blew up on me, he told me to "fuck off" because he hadn't been feeling well and he didn't want to deal with this mess right now. So I didn't contact him for a few days, then I asked if he wanted to meet for lunch. He agreed. So at lunch I told him how rude and disrespectful it was that he told me to fuck off when I was in the dark with no idea what's going on. He told me he was sorry, but I wouldn't leave him alone and he was tired of talking to me about it, and said I shouldn't stress so much. We haven't even addressed what happened the night I got upset, which is what started this to begin with, but I just said okay and tried to take his word for it. 

Even after this he was still being distant, not chatting me up much or asking me to hang out. I finally got him to invite me over one evening, and I planned on trying to talk to him again, but we were having a nice time and things seemed okay and I hoped after having a good time together things would start smoothing over. But once again after that he was distant. A week after that I got him to hang out with me again and we spent the day goofing off around town, eating, talking, driving around and walking around. I decided to talk to him toward the end of our hang out. I was being calm. I brought up pretty much everything I mentioned in this post. I told him I was bummed out, we still hadn't talked about what happened that one night, and I'd like to know where we stand. He just shut me down and told me he wasn't into pursuing anything with me anymore and we should just be friends...

It really broke my heart. I'm paranoid he just used me for some sex. I thought things had been going really well until that one night, and then it was so easy for him to dismiss me and turn his back on me. I know I could have handled that one night better, and I know I could have given him some space, but I feel like he could have handled things better too and not been so hostile and refuse to talk to me. I really miss him, I check my phone hoping he'll have said something, but of course he hasn't. I partly want to try to contact him too, but I figure if he wanted to talk to me he would have contacted me. It's been almost a month now. It still hurts like hell. I pretty much shut down completely after all this happened. I was already on the edge and this was like a very forceful shove off. 