Hello there, bit of context, diagnoses with BPD about a month ago, first time posting in here, thankful to have a space like this to ask for advice. 
I find that when I get going in an argument or if I perceive hurt from certain people in my life, I say the most vulgar and hurtful things that often, I can never take back nor apologize for. They have ruined relationships in the past, by they I mean the hurtful things I’ve said I know it’s still me, but I’m my life today it’s causing me to lose my mother. I feel as though she doesn’t hear me, understand what I’m trying to say &amp; I just lose it. I’m a recovering drug addict and whenever my behaviour is off, she starts to behave the same way I did when I used to use. It hurts me that she does this, but I realize I can also be perceiving something that isn’t there. Anyways, point being; is there any tips anyone has for being able to stop the hate from pouring out? Any tricks for immediately putting the brakes on the train of anger that just demolishes my brain sometimes? I know this is more of a personal anger management issue than anything else, but I’m really looking for any advice to calm down those thoughts of hate because of past trauma. So any help is greatly appreciated.