Hello,im 17 years old guy and i think im borderline, and when i was kid(7-8) i used to kill animals and then cry for days,is this normal?i killed 2 kitten and many chicken, i used to throw my first kitten until it started bleeding and thats why it died, and i drowned my second kitten in the toilet and then cry for days, i also used to drown my chickens and then laugh, now i dont do that but sometimes i abuse people(physically and mentally)i dont have friends and i never go outside, school therapist said that i need mental help but its expensive.