I don’t know where else to really put this and Im scared to talk to anyone else so here goes….
I’m 18 and feel so lost as to how the fuck to be an adult I’m in my first year of college and have no idea what the hell I’m doing I feel so lost. I can’t find part time work anywhere I’ve applied to 30+ places in my area in the past 2-3 months and haven’t heard back from a single one and I’m broke I don’t even have money to fill the tank in my car my girlfriend is trying her hardest for me but I feel so guilty for wasting her time I feel I can’t even let out my emotions around anyone and when I’m home I’m just miserable constantly being harped at to do stuff that isn’t my responsibility whatsoever I just want to let it all out but I can’t even fucking cry no matter how sad I get or how bad I want to I can’t cry and I feel so detached and almost inhuman and just cold and numb I feel like less of a man like I’m just some whiny child who’s selfish and not taking shit seriously, I just don’t know what to do anymore I’m scared and sad and just want this feeling to be over.