i’ve been feeling like this for years now and no matter how much i want to believe it I know things will never get better. I’m tired of feeling like I’m in a race with everyone around me and they are all moving towards the future while i’m still stuck right where i started. I’m tired of feeling like I don’t belong anywhere, and that there’s nobody who can truly understand me and be there for me because everyone already has someone in their life who is more important to them than me. I just graduated high school and i already feel like my life is flying by and not a damn thing is changing. Im a loser and a failure, i’m not even going to college anytime soon because I’m scared and I don’t know what I want to do with my life, I’m just living day by day and i’m sick of it, i’m sick of everything I just wish i was dead so my misery can end. I hate watching people my age go out with friends, have relationships and just live life. I feel like a freak because i don’t have any of that, i can’t relate to any of them and it sucks. I just wish I could be normal, I wish I could change but it’s too late. There is no hope for me.