I've been having a tough time lately, little things my head makes into these giant things...

Losing one airpod given to me by my work. Even if I will replace it with my own money I feel horrendous.

Not being able to spend Christmas with my friend-family this year because they're celebrating with their blood family and I can't come because their family are farmers and hate vegans.

I had a bad day because of these, hurting myself, breaking my glasses in the process, and screaming and crying. Like, screaming. And I'm sure people heard. I'm sure my neighbours heard. Nobody called the police on me, nobody came to check on me, if I kill myself nobody will find me until work comes to get me. It wouldn't be my friends. It wouldn't be my family. It wouldn't be my neighbours. It wouldn't be people on the street. Nobody would care. I've had some of these episodes before, crying and screaming my lungs put and afterwards I think about how nobody came and it makes me that much more lonely.