I used to have 2-3 anxiety attacks each week, but since a month or so I've been having them on a daily basis. And because of them I can barely sleep at night. Sometimes I want to cry it out but I just can't cry. I am at the lowest point in my life and most of my friends have either ghosted me or ignore me, so having no one to talk to or share my feelings makes it even harder. Everyday I feel like crying but tears don't come out of my eyes, this has been happening to me since the closest person to me (my cousin) took his own life 1.5 years ago, a week later having me make a promise to him that I'll never ever commit suicide in my life. That promise is the only driving force in my life right now but I don't know for how long that'll be the case.

Thank you for reading this, sorry for errors, English is not my first language and I'm bad at expressing myself.