I would like to send a message to my ex who struggles with BPD. We had a bad break up and I didn’t handle things the best. The damage is irreversible. But for the majority of the relationship, even through her lies, infidelity, and disappearing acts/constantly being raged on and broken up with. I stayed true. Always faithful, always by her side, I never broke up with her. Always took her back and said it’s okay. I tried so hard to understand things but was not aware of BPD. I love her so much, she is an amazing soul. 

I don’t want to fault her in any way. I don’t want to mention anything that pertains to our break up. We reconciled a month after it happened, and then she suddenly moved on to someone else a week later. 

How would you respond to a message entailing these things? 

I want to 
- wish her well 
- tell her she deserves happiness and a life full of joy 
- tell her how much I appreciate the love and memories we shared, and how thankful I am that I got to experience her as a person. 
- tell her they were the best times of my life and I had never felt more alive or happy 
- tell her I’m sorry for the times I didn’t handle things the best 
- mention some of our favorite moments
- tell her she is the most amazing person I’ve ever met, most beautiful person I’ve seen, and most interesting person I’ve ever talked to
- tell her I hold no resentments and just appreciate the fact i got to be with her when i did
- tell her she will always hold a special place in my heart 


I know we can’t be together. But I want her to know someone truly loved her and meant every word, no matter what happened. She told me no one gets her like me, and I truly believe it. I’ve studied so much to try and understand 


I don’t want to trigger her. I don’t want to come off as crazy. We haven’t spoke in a month. 

Any advice would really help