Whenever I go to a restaurant/bar/café alone or just with my girlfriend, I feel extremely self conscious. My behaviour gets subtly awkward, and I can't stop paying attention to my peripheral vision, and I even shake a little bit sometimes. As a consequence, I can't take any enjoyment from the experience. Why do I feel like this? The people around me don't seem to be like that, they just go about their business and have loud conversations without a care in the world. I want to be centered and solid like that. I want to be behind my eyes instead of lost inside my head living in a parody of the world all the time.