hi there! 
so about two days ago i had what seemed to be a little “episode”. i can’t really specify what kind because i haven’t been diagnosed with anything, but there was a lot of derealization, some slight paranoia (including me literally planning to up and leave), self harm, and some more that i can’t really remember. 
i ended up texting my best friend who is pretty much my only support system rn / the only person i feel comfortable talking to about these things. i’ve also deleted all my social media and left all my groupchats (beginning of january). she asked if i was doing okay and when i responded with things that definitely indicated i was not (like running away, etc.) she didn’t respond. not a huge deal, she’s usually very good about my mental health, so i don’t use that against her. my phone was off all of yesterday, and when i turned it on, she had not texted me. i later found out through a mutual friend she was out partying last night. 
am i allowed to be a little upset by this? she is very aware that i don’t really have other people to talk to (other than my therapist) and that talking generally is my preferred method of working out my problems. i just feel a little upset but i can’t tell if i’m over reacting.
thanks in advance for all the help!