Slight TW for brief abuse/r*pe mention


I have like a textbook case of BPD. Pretty much every awful aspect of it unfortunately. But one thing that’s always puzzled me and makes me feel like an imposter or something is that I don’t feel like I have a reason to have BPD? 

I can’t even remember much of my childhood, or even teen years, but I know it wasn’t really like full of childhood trauma or anything I don’t think? I can remember a few bad incidents, one where my mom like dragged me down the hallway by my hair when I was a kid because I slammed my door or something, one instance where my dad became super angry and punched a door and put a hole in it (that was like the only time I ever saw him really angry) and one kinda shitty time when my dad left overnight and my mom was crying and told me he was chatting online with some old colleague of his from back in his home town. Obviously I didn’t hear all the details but it was like borderline cheating from what I understand. I did also always feel like my mom didn’t really pay attention to what I said or listen to me when I was talking so that’s a bit of a sensitive topic for me. I’m easily triggered when I feel like somebody isn’t listening to me, and I often repeat something a bunch of times thinking they didn’t pay attention the first time(s) 

Except for those instances I can’t remember any like real abuse or trauma. I suppose something could have happened when I was really young and don’t remember, but would that count? Are my experiences “enough?” I experienced a lot of trauma later on from bullying or sexual harassment, I lost my virginity to rape by my boyfriend at the time when I was 16, but those things are like too “late” to cause bpd right??? I just don’t know where I got this from.