Hey everyone, I hope you’re all in a positive mental space or at least trending toward one. I’ve been on Reddit for years and never posted anything, but my life is at a particular turning point mentally and there’s so much I need to get off my chest. My life and my problems are very much centered around deep anxiety that affects so many aspects of my life on a daily and long term basis. In recent months I’ve been seeing psychologists and actually wrote a 20-page letter to my family to try to explain to them what’s been going on. I’ve discovered recently how therapeutic writing is, but it’s also so hard to write something out that actually feels like it represents the true nature of what I mean it to say. The last thing I want to do is minimize your/anyone’s experiences and anxieties in any way, but I must say that mine are incredibly complicated, abstract, and so difficult to process that it’s taken me 20 years to even have a workable grasp of what I’m dealing with. It’s so complex and bizarre that I can’t even come close to breaking the surface speaking with psychologists, largely because I have damning issues verbalizing not only my thoughts, but anything. Writing, however, I’m good at and enjoy. The reason I posted this is because I’ve come to a point where I can see a clearer trajectory to achieve better peace of mind, but simply don’t believe in myself enough to follow through without actually telling someone what it is that I’m doing. I’m basically looking for a community or person who is willing to read my writings. I’m not looking to be therapized, I just need someone to listed because I’m not nearly at a a point where I can fully explain everything to family or doctors. I can’t even tell my best friends (yet). Let me be clear, though, that I’ve never had any self-harm type thoughts, and I’m a wildly successful person by many metrics. That is also why it is so hard to talk to people about it without getting brushed off - as I’m sure so many of you experience, I consistently get the “what do you have to be anxious about?” shtick. I tend to way over explain things and I’m much too verbose in my writing, sorry about that. But, I really just need someone willing to read what I have to say. Thoughts and advice are extremely welcome, but I really just need someone to listen. I don’t know the best way to do this. If you’re willing to hear me, please shoot me a message or respond here. Or if you know of a better place or way for me to this, I’m all ears. Thank you and I wish you all clarity and peace of mind.