I’ve been struggling with being angry for months now. I’d say since the beginning of August. We have moved across country and I have been angry about not being close to my family. We both have no family here. We had to move because of my husbands kids. I’ve held a grudge against him for months now and I totally know it’s not his fault but I feel like I have no one else to blame. We have also been trying to have a baby for 7 years now with no success and it used to not bother me but this year it’s literally shedded my soul and I feel like it’s added on top of my anger. Last night I had my first mental break down. My husband had to stop me from leaving our room. I threatened to kill myself 4 different ways while I watched him cry and beg for me to snap out of it. This morning I just feel nothing. I’ve never felt so numb in my life and I just want to go back home. I can’t forgive myself for the way I acted last night. I’ve never felt so worthless. I just sent him a long text saying how much better he would be without me. Which is true I’ve been so bad for months and he’s a good person. I just want him to be happy and not have me stop him from his happiness. I just want to feel better 😭 I’m not sure if this is depression or what it is. Like I said I’ve never really suffered from any kind of mental illness until I moved across country. Any advise would be great.