My family and people around me are all saying I'm so lucky and should be happy because I achieved so many things and doing amazing things in life but unfortunately they don't see what i see, i can see what I'm doing is actually nothing compared to others, i keep comparing myself with others, espically with older people then my age (i must be a retard i know) 

But i can see most people are way more successful then me and more i work hard and study and research hard i can see it's all for nothing because most people are still way ahead of me and my ambisson to be the best on most things will kill me because I realized i will never be the best on most things, maybe if I were to focus on only one thing and work hard on it MAYBE i could be the best on it but i will never be the best on everything probably, I'm too tired of tryna fit in, I'm just tired.