I'm pretty sure all my family members and coworkers despise me and I can give you individual reasons for why each one despises me. I have a handful of friends, who keep me around out of habit and sympathy but that's the most charitable feeling I can probably expect from them. 

Nonetheless, because BPD, I realize that I don't have the best ability to read reality. So I might be wrong. But I don't feel wrong, my gut instinct tells me that everyone's distaste is both real and justified and tied together with a clear chain of logic. 

It's very hard to walk around and get your shit done if you know that everyone around you hates your guts. I wish I were a sociopath.

What can I do to make the fear, shame and anger less severe? 