I met someone back in May and we became friends. That's all we were and all we still are for now but there is an attraction there for both of us. For now we've both just kinda said we like things the way they are and we'll see where they go from here. My difficulty is that this is completely foreign to me. I don't play it cool. I form a connection to someone fairly quickly and it's always strong. Even if I play it cool and wait to see if we're compatible that strong connection is always there. I know I need them. I crave their presence. My happiness hinges on their every word. They can make or break me. Obviously that isn't healthy but that's what feeling a spark with someone is to me. That's not how I feel about this friend. I like talking to her and I'm attracted to her but I'm not crazy about her. If it doesn't work out for us being more than friends I'll be sad and it'll hurt but I'll be ok and life will go on. I'm not sure if that's good or not. On the one hand I think it'll never work because that spark isn't there but on the other hand I hate how I feel when that spark is there. It's amazing but it's also hopelessly intertwined with anxiety and it never goes well. I can always look back and say there was a point where I knew it wouldn't work but I was too addicted to that feeling to turn back. That's not the case with this friend. I'm pretty clear headed that she's good for me. She has her own issues but she's aware of them and working on them, which is more than I can say of anyone I've ever been with. The only thing I'm confused and unclear about is if this is just what it's supposed to be like in the beginning and I'm experiencing something healthy after all the work I've done or if this is just what it's like when you're not all that into someone and it's not going to work. Thoughts?