Hello, I have feel that I have completely lost it. I have been struggling with severe anxiety within the last two months. The first month was more physical symptoms and now this month is more mental with panicking thoughts. 

I went to a doctor and was prescribed 25mg of Zoloft and 50mg of hydroxyzine for panic attacks. This was over three weeks ago. I was hesitant, but I just started the meds today. 

I have the same thoughts over with my anxiety: 
• ‘What if I don’t get better?’
• ‘You’re crazy and doing this to yourself.’
• ‘What if you go to the hospital/psych ward and they won’t be able to help you.’ 

I’ve done everything to try to change the thoughts, but I am in extreme panic. I have these thoughts everyday that they scare me. I try to distract myself, push them away, but they don’t go away. I no longer look forward to the next day. I can no longer sleep, I can’t go throughout my day. I have also been experiencing extreme derealization. I just feel hopeless and crazy. 

I feel like admitting myself to the ER and getting treatment at the inpatient psychiatrist services, but I am scared that they can’t help me. My brain keeps telling me to go. But I don’t want to worry my family or worsen myself. I just feel crazy and I am scared. I want to be normal.

Any advice?