My life is in complete shambles. I have no one except my mom. I'm trying to get back to school to make something of myself but am barely able to get through a couple community college courses. I'm mostly isolated and have lost what little ability I had to interact with people. I have years of experience in retail yet at this point I'm too afraid to even get a simple job working as a cashier. I completely fucked my life up. At my age I should have graduated college, gotten a decent job and should be living on my own. Instead I'm unemployed and my social anxiety is so bad I barely want to leave the house. I feel like I should probably just kill myself already. Living as a pathetic husk of a person with no social ability is too much to bare. I fucking hate myself and the decisions I made to get here. I should have gone back to school when I still had somewhat of a life and was supporting myself. Now I feel like I've waited too long and am not capable of shit. My brain has rotted from avoidance and social isolation. I swear I'm going to fucking kill myself any day now this life is not worth living. Sorry for my list of self-pitying complains I needed to let it out somewhere. I'm sure I'll delete this post soon.