Ive been depressed on and off pretty much since I was a kid. Im nearly 30 now. I have spent the last year feeling suicidal and have come pretty close to taking my life. I have tried every anti-depressant under the sun and it has made no difference. Been to therapy long-term, didn't work. tried CBT and a bunch of other stuff. Doesn't work. Been to suicidal helplines etc. they just "wow that must be really hard to feel like that".   

My life has become steadily worse over the last few of years. Im still single. Im terrible at my job. No savings. No friends in the city I live in. I just really don't see things getting better. I feel 1 year of intensely trying to get better with no improvements what so ever is enough. Nobody= even notices just how down and hopeless I am. I could be dead in my room and no one would notice for weeks. Not even my flatmate. 

So I guess this is a last ditch attempt. Does it "get better"? Is there any hope? If i've tried seeking help and it hasn't helped what do I do? Has anyone been in this position and actually got to a stage where they enjoy life? Or am I doomed to recurrent cycles of depression until I finally end things.