Like everyone here I don't want to be alive. I haven't ever wanted to be alive. There is no reason for me to be alive. I don't have people that I'm worried about leaving. I don't have any hope for the future. I know that there is no possible way for it to get better.  I don't have any hope. I've done everything I can to make my life worth living and its still not worth it. The only reason I'm still here is I'm afraid dying will be worse. I know that I'm going to be miserable here and I can't bare making it worse. What am I supposed to do? I feel trapped. I shouldn't have to live if I don't want to. Its not fair that my options are pain or more pain. Why isn't there something else?