I broke up with my ex a few months ago but we decided to stay in touch and we basically acted like a couple, because I have trouble moving on from people. I’ve had some health issues recently and he’s been really helpful looking after me and taking me to the hospital. This just made me fall in love with him again and want to get back together with him. So i brought it up to him and he said he had been thinking and realised we wouldn’t work out as we want different things in life and my moods are a lot to deal with. Ouch :(

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed with the health stuff and work, so this set me off so bad. I started screaming at him, telling him I hate him and that he’s lied to and misled me. I felt really betrayed, but that’s no excuse for the horrible things I said. I went on for an hour until I kicked him out.

That was a week ago now, and I fell into a deep depression after and missed work and just cried in bed. I’m finally feeling a lot better now, but I’ve also realised the awful things I’ve done to someone I love. I haven’t heard from him since (no surprise) but I’m worried about how he’s doing. He also suffers from depression and I’m scared that I’ve really hurt him. 

I want to let him know that I didn’t mean anything I said and that he’s a good person. But I know I need space from him to properly move on. Maybe we can be proper friends one day, without the sex and romance, but that’s only going to happen once I no longer love him. I’m scared that hearing from him will suck me back in and I’ll end up in this situation again. I don’t know what to do.