I let my social anxiety compeltely take me over . I avoid anything in my life that has me do any socialising . Now iam socially isolated person with no future , no goals , no friends . But 1 of the most shameful things about me  is inability to find  myself a job . Im just terrified of even thinking of it . Iam extremely weird around people , i feel always judged (even when im not ) , i just cant function around people . Im terrified that even if i could bring myself to do it theres a chance that i will end up in more dark place then from where i started . Also i dont know what job im supposed to look for , cause im good at nothing and social anxiety on top doesnt help either . The only thing i could tell myself in a job interview is that im full of mental illnesses its just nothing more in my life , it basically defines me . But despite that theres a small chance that i might be better if i could find a job cause it would let me be less of a burden for my family and maybe the shame im feeling would reduce . i dont know im just extremely confused and lost .