I always repress a lot of memories so my memory is quite fucked up but few days ago I remembered something that happened and now I'm wondering if it is the reason why I feel repulsed by men during sex sometimes. So when I was 16/17, I was with some guy friends (only 2 were actually friends I liked) and we went to one of their houses to drink and hang out. We were playing a game and I was dared to kiss this guy so I did and thought nothing of it. A few moments later, the other guys were looking at their phone and said that they had to pick their friend up from somewhere so while I couldn't understand what was going on they just left me alone with this guy and we were both drunk (him more than me). I was weirded out but since this guy was a friend I didn't think anything bad. We started to clean the beer cans etc. and then he started to approach me and kinda cornered me so I got  scared and I think I hit him on the arm? then he took out a condom which made me more scared. I ran up to the balcony and texted the other guys who left and told them to come back. Afterwards they came back and I just went home. The fact that they came back quickly meant that the whole story they made up was to get him and me alone. Looking back I could have been sexually assaulted and it disgusts me.

After remembering this instance, I am wondering whether I am uncomfortable when men try to do something sexual or try to be dominant because I subconsciously think they will do something I don't want? I love sex and like it especially when I am the dominant one but when men try to take charge it kind of disturbs me. Do you guys think this is the reason why? or this is instance insignificant cuz I just remembered it and never really thought about it until few days ago.