My best friend partner has given up on me. I don’t wanna move back to my old hometown because my abusive ex is there. I don’t wanna move back near family cause it’s hopeless there. I don’t wanna leave behind everything I built here but he says he wants me out he said. I just want to overdose but I don’t have access to any pills so I’m stuck here living but I can’t do this anymore for any longer and I don’t know what to do. I’m in therapy twice a week one group one one on one and take meds but they don’t help for this and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want to move in with my friend all the way back near the ex. I don’t know what to do I can’t do this anymore I really really really can’t do it anymore but I can’t kill myself cause I am scared of pain and dying and I won’t do it without pills but it’s all so hopeless and pointless I want to be dead so bad.