Hi I’m 24 and I’m very well acquainted with anxiety. I think it would be helpful to type this out for me to process. Today has been a particularly hard day for me. Ive been dating someone for a little over a month now and I spent the night at their house yesterday. They had a friend and their partner from out of town staying with them last night too and meeting them was really scary for some reason.  I was petrified and woke up feeling the same way. It’s terrible and I’m still not doing well. 

The friends were still here this morning and we were going to go out for breakfast and I flaked because I was on the brink of panic. I told the person I’m dating that I was anxious today and they were very sweet about it. I spent the day alone to recuperate from that whole interaction with their friends lol. Well, I decided to hangout with my new love interest again tonight, watching tv, and I was being a total weirdo and having chest pains and just generally feeling horrible. 

I think they could tell I’m uncomfortable and they left. Our whole vibe has been off today and I blame myself for it. I hate that I got through periods where my anxiety removes me from a potentially fun and rewarding reality. It makes me sad honestly. Something I’m trying to tell myself is that the right people in our lives will stick around and understand that we’re not perfect beings and some days are harder than others. Acceptance is really hard but it’ll be okay in the end.. right?