I am reaching the point of no return with my anxiety I have am a NEET but have degrees and have worked before. The combination of brexir and lockdown mDe job hunting completely unrealistic for a time but now it is on me. I struggle to even submlt applications now and to be honest even leave my house at all. I think in could now find work I had more confidence. Last time I went to the doctors was for depression at 15 (now 24) but they wouldn't give me meds only cbt because I didn't yet have self harm, I cur my wrists shortly after that to get the meds but then felt started feeling anxiety about doctors so never got back. I want to get something to help me get myself employed but I'm scared I'm just going to get told the same thing( though  I have some poof now). I'm not an addict or anything  i just want to have help to earn my own money. I bought propolanol privately but it doesn't  help and nor does weed. I want to get meds to help me get employed because last time I was employed I did not have anxiety or depression. And yet those things are preventing be get employed right now. I can't possibly endure therapy because it is even worse than the job hunting that is stressing me in the first place.