its for good this time, even though it probably won’t be forever, i don’t see us talking for a long while. she said she didn’t want it to be bitter and it wasn’t but it hurts so bad

we have a long history together and i don’t want to lose her, but we both need this

i need healthy ways to cope with this. i don’t want to go back to doing the shitty things i would do to cope before. this is my first time reaching out for help and willing to take it