I tried to get out of my bubble and to go out with some co-workers that I find fun and chill. It was a disaster. After an hour I couldn't speak back and I couldn't find any topics, so I went into absolute mutism and made a fool of myself as per usual. Sometimes I wonder why I even try to get out of my comfort zone, when 9/10 times it's a failure and I end up sad and unsatisfied. I just wish I wouldn't overthink everything i do or say, and every movement of my body and face. Why can't I just turn off my brain? Why do I have to get drunk to feel comfortable around people? I hate this.