First post here, not really sure how much of this works. Regardless I wanted to see if others with BPD struggle with the same question. 

I can attribute most of it to the unstable sense of self-image I carry, (as well as being young and still finding myself), however I always come back to the question: how do others perceive me? 

Do people see me as a good or bad person? What do my boyfriend and (few) friends see/think of when I cross their mind? Am I intellectual, unapproachable, or intriguing? How do strangers perceive me when we walk past one another on the street?

To clarify, I don’t wanna define myself through the perceptions of others…but part of me feels that I overthink how others see me so extensively that it further skews my sense of self. I do often ponder, if I could just see myself how others do, maybe I wouldn’t have such low self esteem…or on the flip side, maybe it would deplete further. 

Does anyone else struggle with this? I know it differs for everyone, but if you’ve overcame this or can offer a similar experience/empathy, what helped you?