For example I’ll open social media and see TONS of pretty colours and gorgeous designs and patterns in either clothes or stickers or merch or crochet animals and the only way to describe the feeling in my body is a lighter intense “magnetic” type of overwhelming pain which I am assuming is jealousy. 
This jealousy has nothing to do with them and everything to do with how I view myself not good enough to possess or create the things i see. but it’s too overwhelming now. I can’t stop viewing it immediately because the colors are pretty the designs are things i really like but it’s so intense the feeling of shutting my eyes and ears so hard and curling up
I don’t know how to deal with this I’m super confused