So I guess, how? 

It’s close to my birthday. I’ve decided I want to go to the beach. I can’t do that around here. It’s cold. I can’t go back to my home state, and swim, it’s too cold. So I’m thinking I’ll head out to California. I think I can take out $1,000 from the ATM, mail my husband my cards/wallet/etc. just take a phone, a pair of shorts, sandals, tee. I don’t drive so, get a greyhound ticket to CA? 

I want to spend the day swimming. I love to swim. Write notes to my kids, my husband. 

I’m thinking do what I want for the day. Eat what I want. Listen to music I want. And at the end of the day…. Do it. After maybe watching the sun set. 

Anyway I think that’s my plan. Tomorrow, I’m off from work. So I can probably get this done quickly and no one will see it coming to stop me I couldn’t bare it if someone stopped me.

This pain needs to end.