naturally acting like a psycho hose beast! got into a minor scuffle with my partner last night which triggered us both and escalated to fighting *dirty* until almost 5 AM 🙄

i fucking hate that i can’t just let shit go. i have valid concerns in our relationship but at the same time i make shit so much worse because i latch onto the argument like a jack russell on a toddler’s face. in the moment, there is nothing anyone can do or say to distract me apart from literally hitting/choking me (which ofc then reinforces my victim narrative). i’m used to taking shots to hit the reset button but if i relapse again my partner/FP will leave me for good.