I’m a 24M

There is not one thing in this world I want more than a family, the idea of having a wife &amp; children makes me cry constantly, in part bc I love the thought &amp; in part bc it feels like an unattainable dream

I’ve never had a girlfriend, I’ve never come close to having a girlfriend &amp; honestly I truly believe I never will

I care so deeply for people &amp; especially my friends, I’m always present, I’m always the one everybody talks to bc I care so deeply, but I’m convinced no one cares about me nearly as much as I care about them

I associate existential value with connection with others
Connecting with other ppl is everything, it adds so much meaning to our lives

I have never once in my life come close to establishing a meaningful connection with someone I love &amp; who loves me in return…
Idk what to say, I feel completely valueless bc even tho I have good friends, that’s all I have &amp; it’s all I’ll ever have

I’m entirely unable to connect with someone on a deep, emotional, meaningful level &amp; I can’t take it anymore, idk what to do &amp; it’s just making me hate my life &amp; I want so madly to enjoy the simplest things in the world, a family &amp; it’s just not anywhere in sight

I’m sobbing as I write this bc while I’m not suicidal or anything, I desperately wish I was never born, I can’t connect with someone so I must be no one, my life is pointless…