I've thought about it occasionally but I'm incredibly ambivalent about it. On one hand, it's rather comforting to not worry about anything anymore once you're on the other side. On the other hand, it's frightening to not know what is on the other side, and to think about what you leave behind.

And, well, is it even normal to think about it this way? At the lowest of my low points I've def considered just ending it all. Take a ride out to a gun shop, find a nice spot in the woods, and just cap myself. I never really wanted to,  though. Like if i had to put it in a number, 25% of me really wanted to kill myself at the lowest point in my life.

Honestly, I'm still frightened that suicide is even in the realm of possibility. It's not likely... but it's possible.