Onligatory I'm on mobile, so I apologize for formatting weirdness of any kind.

Preface: my partner is amazing, I was just deeply upset after this.

Today, I (23nb/f) was talking to my fiance (25m) about how I need to request a Wednesday off asap even though I normally only have Saturdays off for a psychiatric appointment. I mentioned that I think having the entire day off would be best because we are going to discuss some heavy topics as we mutually agreed on. It was hard for me to admit to myself that I need the day off since I'm a workaholic to a major fault.

My fiance was curious what this heavy topic was about, and since I have been with him for 4.5 years, I felt like I ought to talk about it a bit. I mentioned that I am extremely worried that I was misdiagnosed with PTSD but that I could be gaslighting myself, which I heard is a trauma response) so I need some help understanding such things. I was a little escalated and have been for the past two days and off and on throughout the months more frequently than usual. I vented about a few other things, such as my messed up dream from last night, and after a long pause he simply said "you are manic".

The curtness of how he said it threw me into more distress because I felt so insulted. I do not experience mania as I do not have any form of bipolar depression, and I unfortunately have a distaste toward the disorder because of an abusive ex (I know this isn't cool but I've gotten better for sure, I'm sorry to offend).

I felt like he suddenly didn't even know me! I simply stormed off and left for work, but we did say I love you to each other at least. I am still fuming internally and I hate it so much. I find myself hating myself even more and more when I lose composition especially since I am on the perfect med combination and I have completed DBT.

I guess I just had to vent. Much love if anyone read this long-winded post!