After I've lost my transplant kidney, my mental was down. Because I was like no, not again. But anyway. I was on dialysis again! 1 year later I got another kidney transplants. 

And when we look into our family, our family relationships were different. My mom and I was okay but between my dad and me. Idk something was wrong. We were fight a lot with my dad. I was angry child, but dad was angry also, and one day I was play at the school garden our house in front of school so you can see school garden when youre at balcony. Any way I was play with my other friends. We re all like 13-14 age so. Anyway I ran away behind tree or something like that cuz we were play basketball, I guess I tried to catch ball. and other friend come behind me to catch ball. Well he was a male friend, and its too normal to me. I was child and don't think in a bad way. After I back to home , washed my hands, and dad come to me and hit me on my face and I run into bathroom, grandma and  mom tried to protect me from dad/ and he said I still remember ; He screams and said 'are you going to be hole? why this guy come after you??? ' I scared a lot. I didn't even understand why dad said this. Like wtf. I was already in bad mood. cuz of my health. at this moment, I thought dad hate me because he sold house/car for fix my health and become poor. that's why I thought he hit me , slapped me and I thought he hates me. I was child, what should I think ?? After this I've had trust issues. and more bad things happened to me and between dad. I was chatting with friends on phone like 11PM , Idk if you know nokia phone. but its a lit bit noisy. and dad saw it , got my phone and throw away my phone, 2days after bought me new phone. I never understand why ? one day I ve wake up, while parents sleep. Found dad wallet, got his credit cards and cash moneys, and left home. I went another city. a week later aunt found me, I was like no I don't wanna back home, my dad on his way to pick me up from aunt home, and I was scary as fuck. and drink all of my medical pills, we went hospital, I felt down and don't remember after this. I picked to die, and couldn't die. When i opened my eyes, I saw dad was crying  and heard mom at the hospital also at our city. I thought no I never do this again, cuz I love my mom.

But my mental health become more fucked up after this situation.