I dont know how I'm supposed to keep going, there is so much needed from me and people counting on me but I feel like I can't do it I try to stay positive while everything around me is negative or just literally falling apart and sometimes being dismantled right in front of me. I want to fight but I feel so heavy like it's just useless, I feel very useless. I have no friends, no family that want anything to do with me, no job and can't seem to get one that's not just costing everything to maintain. I don't really expect this to help I just have no one to even vent to, my wife says just "change" or go to therapy but if it was that easy or I had the money I wouldn't be here right now, I'm just really far down and my options feel very limited and will only hurt the people who love me unless I can "change"