They say it's cruel to lie

But I can't tell the truth

I never learned

I didn't think

That I had earned

The Right to Speak

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My own Mind

My own Words

My own Feelings

My own Hurts

So big- so WRONG

I had to lie, had to pretend

Or Everyone Would Hate Me

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I turned into

An empty headed doll

With a made to order smile

Who chugged cheap alcohol 

To avoid verbal bile

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When men would put their hands on me

And whisper filth into my ear

I would giggle and flirt

But they had no fucking idea

Just how much I HATED them

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Until, until my world collapsed

The one who made me feel okay

Abandoned me

Rejected me

Suddenly the booze that protected me

Turned me into a monster

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Now I have to deal with it

Now I must be sober

Now I must be honest

But God, does is SUCK