I have a particularly worrying mental health issue that I just don’t understand and it’s terrifying me. I am diagnosed with anxiety, ADHD from childhood and quite bad OCD. I currently am really struggling with strong cognitive distortions. That is my emotional brain is telling me one thing and my rational brain just can’t seem to keep up. 

I know this is going to sound insane, but I’m literally breaking down of a Nintendo Switch currently. That is, when I don’t have one, all I can think about is buying one, I keep telling myself that it’ll be a good idea, I’ll be able to balance the console with the rest of my life, and that I should just give into impulse and buy it. As SOON as I buy it, this polar opposite side of my brain kicks in and feels an insane amount of guilt, I feel very stressed and I immediately cancel my order, or I sell the device as soon as it arrives. 

I genuinely feel like there’s two maniacs in my brain. Even though I intellectually know that it is completely stupid buying the console, my emotional chimp brain just screeches and screeches about how it’s such a good idea, until I cave in and buy it. Literally as soon as I’ve clicked buy, I feel instant regret and cancel my order. 

What the hell should I do? I’m going crazy!