Most people that I personally know with bipolar disorder have a love/hate relationship with meds and almost no one I know takes them as prescribed like I do. This leads to erratic behavior that I try so hard to avoid myself. It is really hard for me to spend time with people who are not trying to take care of themselves. I am just talking about close relationships here. I try not to judge them but I also don’t enjoy spending much time with them. 

On the other hand, people who don’t need psych meds have a hard time understanding all of the things I do to stay well. I need a lot of sleep, keep a strict schedule, don’t drink, eat healthy food, exercise, etc. It takes a lot of good self care for me to function and most people don’t have to do all of this to stay even keeled.

It’s hard for me to have close relationships with anyone. I have lots of acquaintances and friends but I don’t have as many close friendships as I used to before I got really serious about staying well. 

It is very important for me to stay well because, in the past, I have been unemployed, homeless, and also on disability, and that is not the lifestyle I want for myself. So, I’m more stable than I’ve ever been, but also lonelier. I had more friends when my life was a mess before treatment, but I don’t want to go back to that. Can anyone relate?