Hey guys my boyfriend/ fp of three years has barely been responding to me this past week ): the last time I was able to actually talk to me, he told me that he was overwhelmed by how hard my depressive episodes hit. (I want to clarify that I don’t ever expect him to fix my episodes, he told me that he didn’t like being around the negativity) It made me feel horrible because I had tried to commit suicide the night before, and I just needed actual support from him. The next night he went to a party and I was planning to try again. I did, failed and tried calling him. His ex started posting pictures of them together and it made me panic so much, I called him twelve more times before I gave up. I kept attempting throughout the night and I have just been trying to process the emotions of that night since. Since then (last Saturday) he has been avoiding me hardcore. I feel so guilty and dumb. I’m trying to fight the urge to just block him so I don’t have to guess anticipate the abandonment. But I’m not because I know he has been busy in his personal life, he has been doing a lot of work for his band, school, and now one of his closest friends is moving so I understand that he is going to be busy with his buddies. I just wish he would at least respond to me so I know everything is okay. I’m just scared that my mental illness messed up a relationship that is extremely important to me…. I absolutely do not want to hurt him.