
I literally want every stupid irrational fear i obsess with to become real just so i can stop thinking about it , what is even worse is that I’m unconsciously aiding this . For example I am so afraid of failing in college at the same time I want to fail just so i can feel like I knew this would happen , another one is that i feel like I’m really hated by people and i just want a confirmation of this thought, I don’t know how if I should stop this self sabotage or actually indulge in it so can feel some peace.