Hey hey peeps,

I'll start this by saying yes I know reddit isn't a substitute for professional psychological help. But I'm just lost in a sea of thoughts at the moment and need a place to put my words out in the open.

Earlier this year I was diagnosed with Bipolar Type 2 after previously being diagnosed with depression. While the diagnosis sat well with me at the time I'm starting to doubt it and so is my partner. I've always had the urge/need to make sure I was in everyone's 'good book' and not making anybody upset with anything I did and constantly asking for reassurance even several times in a row. Lately I've also had an extremely short temper with things going on at home and it's as if a switch gets flipped on me when it starts and ends. It's also starting to happen more often with my depressive episodes where I will be at absolute rock bottom one moment then wanting to laugh everything off moments later and it's as if my depressed feelings never existed. 

One past experience that sticks out to me is when I had my worst panic attack in my life (can give details if asked for it but keeping it out to avoid triggering anybody) and after people around me were able to make it stop I had an almost uncontrollable urge to laugh.

I am seeing a psychologist currently but I've only had my third session with them the other day so it's still a bit early. With my current psych I am going down the 'traditional' therapy route and looking back on past traumas etc whereas my previous psych (who diagnosed me with depression and both general and social anxiety) was more for mental maintenance and making sure I didn't go too far in the deep end.

Sorry if this doesn't make much sense I'm just typing words as my brain says them. Thanks heaps in advance for anyone who has any advice, input or help 😊😊