alright so I've been smoking weed every single day since 2 months after it was legalized in canada. at first it was definitely for fun, but i've realized I'm straight up struggling with addiction.

I'm at the point where i **want** to quit for many reasons, including my own respiratory health, mental health, and the fact that smoking weed makes me feel like absolute shit in every domain of my life. 

i have all the reasons to quit, i get the motivation to, but honestly .. my days are too long. once it hits 4pm i smoke because i have nothing else to do, so why not get high? but the thing is, is that its not fun for me.

 i do it almost because i feel like i have to, but i no longer enjoy being high. but its become such a routine in my life that i feel like i have no control over it, but 98% of the time, i don't enjoy it. 

&amp;#x200B;

my biggest struggle is going to be sitting with my own feelings and emotions, because for a year and a half now, i haven't had to face them. i'd just get high and would manage to convince myself that i don't actually care about whats hurting me, i'd develop a whole new mindset over it for the time being 

&amp;#x200B;

this honestly isn't the life i want to live. I'm ashamed and disgusted with myself. but i **want** to get better and move forward from this part in my life. 

as of right now, this is something i want to try doing by myself before seeking professional help, so if anyone has any advice or experiences they'd like to share, i'd love to hear it!