I have major anxiety when it comes to money and bills. I grew up with parents who did not earn much, I never got new clothes but clothes from my cousin, we did not always have dinner. (Forever grateful we had a roof over our heads and food inbetween)
Now im in a much better position with my funds but im still stuck in the past and get anxiety when I see money going out of my accounts and I dont like spending money on myself, heck even food, I use one single onion for 4 days, im THAT frugal.

I did however save up a bit to buy me something nice, but I used the pay later option and those bills GREW. I mustered up the courage and faced it, I paid my bills. Im nauseated and im sweating, im close to a panic attack, but I did it.