Yeah that about sums up my issues rn

 I can’t just break down responsibilities into smaller steps/make a hierarchy of importance because they are ALL extremely important and time sensitive. Like I absolutely have to juggle 8 balls or I’m fucked. And everytime I drop one I’m panicking 

Also
Some guy wasn’t interested after the first date and despite using lots of coping skills I’m still stuck on “but why couldn’t I be the one he liked?” And then I go finding  reality based scenarios like I’m supposed to, except all of them showcase what a loser I am (36, no accomplishments, no degree, no job for 11 yrs) 


And the bullshit “therapist” I have been given is shitty so I avoid her because she has  no experience with BPD....but the place helps with filing for housing and benefits and I need that help so for now I’m staying put but I honestly don’t know how much more time I can handle it here

My pets also overwhelm me because they are annoying sometimes and don’t mewn to be, But when they’re being annoying and I am stuck in my head with the wheels spinning and I’m trying to figure out what to do next and I need all my brain power and attention and focus to be on what to do with my issues, they get to me SO BAD

All the  scratching at me, getting into things they shouldn’t be trying to eat plastic etc. just makes me feel like I want to scream. And even if I play with him a little bit it’s still not enough because they just want TO EAT ALL DAY  and I cannot give that to them