I’ll try and make this brief. I’ve been struggling lately with some depression and anxiety symptoms. I’ve always struggled with this but it’s beginning to get worse. 

Luckily it’s not completely terrible quite yet and every once in awhile I can find myself getting excited for certain things like a road trip back home or a trip to visit family/vacation. It can really lighten my mood and I can actually find myself getting excited prepping for the trip, but the instant I get to my final destination all the positive feelings are gone. I’m instantly back to feeling terrible even if I’m on what should be a nice vacation. Then I feel even worse because I feel guilty for not being more excited that I’m lucky enough to be experiencing a trip or whatever the situation may be. This is just one example but basically I’m able to feel some excitement initially but then when the time comes I’m instantly back into my depressed mood. 

Is this related to depression or anxiety at all? The initial excitement followed by instant feelings of being back at square one with my depressed mood.