I get infuriatingly angry when my boyfriend is at work and I see him active on social media and he doesn’t text me (he takes his break at the same time every day so I know when to expect a text). I know it’s irrational and controlling and I have a very hard time controlling my anger and not lashing out and sending a rude text message to him about it. It makes me feel like I’m unloved and not special enough for him to message, I chalk it up to he doesn’t love me just like the rest. I create stories in my head that he is too busy flirting with a coworker to remember to say hello to his gf. I wonder what it’s like to actually feel emotions that aren’t at the complete extreme ends of the f***ing spectrum. I’m envious of those who don’t have to try with futile effort to reason with logic and not emotion. Some days I feel like giving up on myself, today is one of those days.