Hello. I feel terrible. I don't know where to start. I feel very bad, very anxious, my stomach is a ball of nerves, I feel so bad mentally that I feel sick physically. Everything is a challenge for me, I live in a foreign country and I signed for a language class that started somehow not from the beginning and this literally felt so bad. I really don't know how to explain how I feel and why I feel like this. Everything new scares me. My mother died two years ago. I can't sleep well, my heart literally hurts from all the anxiety I have. I don't know what to do with my life, I'm in a really bad place. I don't have a job right now (I'm signed to an agency that sends me to different warehouses and I'm booked now for 3 months), I don't have any special education, I figured I should study something to make my life better. I'm 35 years old. The job I'm doing right now is the reason I feel so terrible (my anxiety comes and goes) I feel it triggered my anxiety, because it's in a new warehouse with new people and it's something I've never done before. My boss didn't tell me where I'm going to do this job, she literally told me the night before that I have to go to a new place from tomorrow, she didn't explain absolutely anything for the job, she just left us there without information and resources and I feel that's why my anxiety came back with full strength. I was hoping that even something bad is going to happen to me so I won't have to go to work ( something like a car crash, something bad, but not too bad). My boss told me we could call her and ask her about the job, but she didn't pick up her phone when we tried calling her. She told us she may hire us after we do this job, I think this adds to the pressure. The thing is I think most people would see this as an opportunity, but it's a nightmare for me. My husband and I are doing this job, and he's not understanding or willing to help me. I tell him how I feel, but he's like "you'll get better". I don't think I'll get better, I have this anxiety for so long now, it comes and goes. It's not getting better. I don't know what to do with my life. I think anyone in my circumstances would actually feel good and here's me feeling anxious, desperate and just horrible. I don't wanna stay in this country, I wanna go somewhere else, but I don't think that's going to solve my problem as my problem is not the place, it's me.