Oh man, I am so confused. I have made up my mind not to go to my college graduation because:

1. Someone I'm scared and I hate will be there
2. I don't have money for toga.
3. I have no one with me. (My family lives far away.)
4  I'm gonna get anxious seeing other people that have friends while I only have a few.
5. I don't have any honors/awards.
6. It's gonna be hot in there.
7. I'm scared it will rain and it might flood. (The venue is flood prone.)
8. I feel feverish today.

My problem is I said yes to my friends, that I am going. But when I really think about it, I really don't want to go. I already explained in length why I don't want to go. I honestly think I might have some kind of anxiety. And I also have no money for this thing. I do, but it's for my food allowance. I really don't wanna gooooo. Why can't people respect that. Wgen I say it once, I hope they understand and not convince me to go. Like I know this is a once in a lifetime thing but I am not having it. To see people have awards while I don't sucks so bad. I don't wanna goooo. Idc if i regret it. I feel like deactivating/deleting my fb account from June 11 to 20. Aaaahhh whyyyy they do this to me.