TW: Body Dysmorphia, Weight, ED

I'm in a long distance relationship and the last time I saw my boyfriend was 1.5 months ago. In that time I've gained maybe 2-3 pounds. When I look at myself in the mirror I genuinely feel like I've gained 20, because I have always been insecure about my weight. We are supposed to meet this weekend and the little devil on my shoulder wants to cause a fight or cancel or ghost because I feel fat as fuck. Thankfully it's winter so I can conceal it more, but I won't be able to do anything when it comes to having sex. It really kills me because I have worked so hard to get to a healthier weight. I had COVID recently and was confined to bed. Before that, I was just stressed, more sedentary, depressed, bingeing etc.

Please help 🥺