Need serious help, feel lost and don't know what to do. Medical help isn't an option for me and neither is a therapist.

 used to be the most chill and laid back person in the world, and enjoy every second of my life. Oh how that has changed. I don't know what led to my anxiety being like this, but it keeps getting significantly worse. To begin, last year I got into a relationship where my partner acts in a way I am not used to (ie: not resolving a fight immediately, leading me to have a panic attack lasting from the fight's start to finish which can often last multiple days). I believe the relationship has a strong impact on my anxiety at times. Next, not being friends with my best friend anymore could be a factor, which happend about one year ago. Without her, I feel like I am all alone in the world. When we were together, I felt like the best version of myself possible and extremley confident and happy. That feeling is no longer present, ever.

My anxiety is so bad up to the point where at every second in the day, it feels like an elephant is sitting on my chest. I spend all day crying in my bed, freaking out for no reason. I can't sleep unless I smoke weed. I constantly am nervous, and have panic attacks that can last hours. I constantly am shaking and resisting the urge to cry.

 I am feeling depression about my life and want to change everything: move to another country, get all new friends, etc. I just don't want to regret my choice. Either way, this change wouldn't be able to happen for a year. But I really don't want to live another year miserable and unable to function properly. Please help, I have no idea what to do or why I have become like this.