Need some perspective maybe from someone with a psychology background?

I wasn’t sure about the trigger warning because the events I’m about to disclose weren’t violent and I don’t really know much about CSA...

For context, I’m a 23M and am currently waiting for a diagnosis (I believe it’s something between quiet bpd and cptsd)

It’s the third time I seek treatment ( I quit the other two because a diagnosis scares the shit out of me) and since there’s no running from this, all I’ve been doing all day is agonizing and spiraling about the past and the future and in the middle of all this I remembered 2 events:

-I was around 8-9 and I was hanging out in this dude’s backyard (he was 16 I think) and I just remember touching his dick. Sort of like a flashback. Not sure why I did that (I think he blackmailed me? Not sure... it’s a really foggy memory)

-I was around 10-11 and again with this dude, hanging out with two other kids (they were 6-7yo). We were all sitting at the porch of one of those younger kids house and I remember the same dude saying something like “ I’ll give you ‘this’ if you touch us ‘here’ “. Why he said us? No fucking idea. And even more gross, he kept insisting but, fortunately, nobody touched nothing that day...


What I want with this post is:
Do these events qualify as abuse/assault?
Questions are welcome