Hi there, 
I've lurked here for years, was diagonised with BPD 3 years ago.

I wanted to ask if what I am doing is so called splitting. I seem to have a lot of indecisiveness and switching with decisions to do with people, life, activities...most things really. It's flipping from decicsions in minutes and not being able to make a solid choice, some examples :

My date's flat mate asks me to stay for dinner even though it's late, I really want to but when I decide to stay I want to go home, so when I left instead to go home, when I got there I wanted to go back. I felt like I let my date down, but when I wanted to stay I felt like I would be too clingy so left!

I decided with my company to move to Canada, I pushed for years, when I finally got it and to make the descion, I declined it but the next day I really wanted it, and when I convinced myself to commit, I suddenly felt/flipped to stay again. 

It feels like .. if I decide to go left, I go ...and then I feel bad or feel like I should be going right and left is wrong, but when I finally go right, I want to go back to left. Constantly looking for the bad sides of my choices. 

This is really irritating me, on the outside I contradict myself in the same sentence and it can come across like I want to have my cake and eat it, but it's not really like that at all....
