Let's just start off simple.

I can never keep a sleep schedule. No matter how hard it try. I'm told to just "close my eyes and think about something good". I can't do that. It doesn't work. Sometimes I spend hours on end just sitting there waiting to fall asleep. Other times I just spend the time on my phone until my eyes start burning (not painful burning, but more like a "you need to sleep rn" kind of burn". 

That's the only time I can sleep.

I have no clue if it's to do with my anxiety since I have bad anxiety. I hate sleeping. I don't like how time goes by when I sleep. It makes me feel like I'm missing out on my life. It's not scary. I just don't like it. I also have a bad fear of not waking up. Like passing in my sleep and that DOES scare me.

Whenever I try and sleep I think about death. And how when you're dead you're just... Gone. I can't control my thoughts at night. So that stays in my mind for about 10 minutes. Then I remember it again.

Also just knowing that I have to be up for a certain time also scares me. Well, it's not scary. More like it prevents me from sleeping. 

Anyways, any help would be appreciated.