I’ve felt sad for so long I don’t know when I am okay because it all just feels grey. I thought I was getting better but I’ve slowly been noticing that I’ve slipped into some old bad habits. Not showering, brushing my teeth once a day, doing nothing. When people ask what my hobbies are I say art or video games but I don’t even do them anymore. My brain tells me my friends are better off without me. I try to one-up everyone on everything even when it’s not something that is supposed to be good or impressive. I don’t have a purpose in life, I have no goals, and I can’t even imagine me in the future. I feel like a fraud, like I’m faking everything i do but why would I?