I was stood up by someone I thought was a friend and liked me yesterday. I waited around for hours and she finally just stopped messaging. I'm better now since thanks to the awesome curse of BPD I can bounce back pretty quickly. 

Until the night. Then it crushes me to my bones. What did I do? Was I just a jerk and deserved this? Fuck ghosting is so cruel. And honestly I just want her to be okay. She's not well mentally either and it kept me up all night. 

So to the point, I listen to music to help me cope. I am extremely manic and I cannot keep my thoughts. Music helps. My coping songs are "Nova" by Amon Tobin, "Wave (Gabrielmzero remix)" by Tom Jobim and "Order of the Golden Dawn" by Daedalus. If you were going to add a song to my playlist what would it be? Doesn't have to be slow or soothing. Just helpful. I'm spiraling a bit here.

TL;dr 
I need more coping music. I feel worried and helpless.