I have been questioning some traits of my own personality recently and people have told me it could be a cluster B thing or a BPD thing I was raised by a narcissist and have struggled with feeling isolated and alone for many years. I live my life in a fantasy a lot of the times and am always wanting more from life and planning my next thing whatever that is. Relationships have been hard for me and I have a hard time feeling a lot of emotions apart from extreme depression and sadness. I believe I experienced love for someone when I was younger but they hurt me badly and this I believe made me colder to emotional outpouring. I find a lot of the time I just don’t know what is the right thing to feel or say it’s as if I have to think about what emotion should be there if that makes sense. 

Just don’t like the idea of being a horrible person or a bad person and generally want to be a nice person.