I don’t know why I felt compelled to post something here. I’ve been lurking a long time and just needed to vent. I’m just feeling so empty right now. The emotional anguish before it was so intense. It was like my heart broke and the pain radiated out. I felt like the only way to relieve the pain was to tear my skin off and rip out my hair. I curled into a ball and said to myself “please stop” over and over. I went through a month of out patient therapy almost a year ago and it feels like everything is locked behind a door in my mind. Maybe posting this can be therapeutic in some way. I just don’t know. Nothing makes sense.