The love of my life left me in January. 

He is literally the only person, romantic or not, that I've truly loved. Every other relationship was a result or byproduct of my BPD and I was with them just to not be alone. 

I've never experienced this feeling before. 

I don't know what to do. It's been nearly half a year and I still can't fathom moving on or feeling that way about anyone ever again.

It's like I'm numb to everything *except* the sadness of missing him. 

What do I do? :-\