im just thinking about a bunch of stuff right now and it's getting hard to breath and there's like a slight pressure all around me which is usually what happens before an anxiety attack

i really really really hate getting them. ive just been trying to breathe slowly and distract myself but its so hard

i hate getting them so much but they're happening more and more and im scared because sometimes when i get them i feel like im not in reality (i know i am but it feels like im not, it's hard to explain) and the only way for me to ground myself is to self harm which i hate doing but it's lile the only thing that feels real and that i have control of in that moment and it helps me to focus on the pain to snap me out of the attack

but i want to get better at not having them in the first place but i don't know how

i need any help i can get, either how i can distract myself from my thoughts or better ways of getting out of it