These are happy times for my partner as he's planning on joining the military, which he is really excited about it, but this can serve as a nightmare for even military dependents who *don't* suffer from BPD. I would say that my BPD is pretty severe, but I know how to cope with smaller issues. 

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I've never been faced with having to be away from him past 9 hours. The safety aspect of the military gives me crippling anxiety, and lately, I've just been feeling terribly nauseous due to the anxiety and stress of him wanting to join the military. I don't know how I'm going to cope when he goes off to basic training, and I don't even want to THINK about deployments...

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Another fear of mine is, what if the military ends up ruining our relationship? Everything we've worked for over the years. Does the distance make the heart grow fonder, or is that just Hollywood B.S.?

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And as pathetic as this sounds, I forgot how to sleep by myself... I can't even take naps when I'm dead tired but if he's not with me. This is going to be absolute torture for my mental health, but I don't want to be selfish, and make it about me. I just want to be okay while also supporting him.

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Not sure how to cope with this like a normal human being.