He’s been treating me like complete shit since he left me to go to uni Saturday just gone. We’ve done a year of distance already but he has never been like this. Im absolutely crushed. He’s never acted like this with me before, not in the year and three months we’ve been together. 
He’s now living in a house with a girl he’s hooked up with in the past and a couple of their friends. My mind won’t stop racing. 
On Friday night before he left he didn’t really seem to bothered. Last year when he left we talked and talked and cuddled. This time he just stayed on his phone. We barely have anything to say anymore. 
We both came to some agreements/“rules” (god lol... I’m so much fun!) that would help me which would in turn help us both. 
For example, him sticking to plans. Making proper time for me and sticking to it. Not being vague. Letting me know when he’s too busy to text back within at least 10 minutes (I know I know, slightly extreme but he’s living in a house with someone he’s hooked up with AND I feel they’ve always been too close since he started dating me) And making me aware as soon as possible when he decides to go out. 
He has gone back on all of these. And he doesn’t care. He doesn’t feel any remorse. Today makes 4 days that he’s been there. In that house, with her. They have no WiFi until Thursday. Last year we spoke so much while he was away. This year I’ve barely gotten anything. 
Within 4 days He has gone back on almost all of our agreements. Last night we were on the phone and he said I’m putting too much pressure on him and I need to just “deal with it” because he won’t be sticking to these agreements. I asked him over and over again before he left if he’s sure he can do these things to support me and help me and he said yes. I wouldn’t have agreed to doing distance this year if he said no. Am I wrong to think these are simple things? Am I in the wrong for asking? 
When we call it’s awful because we just have nothing to say. It’s like everything’s just gone. He doesn’t talk to me in the same way he doesn’t text me the same way. I feel like I’m being forgotten. I can feel his love slipping away. I can feel myself being replaced. He’s putting everyone first before me. He straight up just doesn’t show that he cares about me in any sort of way. He’s completely different to last year, he’s completely different now that he’s in this house with these people. Last year was different because he wasn’t very comfortable with his house, but whenever he would go back to uni and see his friends it’s like I’d be put on the back burner. He seems to lose all interest in me when he’s there. 
Last night he blamed me for there being nothing to talk about because “I keep starting arguments” I tried to politely say that I am allowed to be upset because you have been breaking agreements. That’s when he told me it was my fault.
He doesn’t want me to visit because I “keep starting arguments” :( 
He’s going out three times this week. I begged him to let me see him this weekend and he said no. He’s going out Wednesday and then both Friday and Saturday. He knows him going out triggers me, I practically begged him to please just give me either Friday or Saturday. I explained calmly that him going out triggers me and 3 days especially 2 in a row on a weekend will be extremely hard for me. He refused. Told me to deal with it. And agreed that I should just get some valium to sleep through those nights.
I told him yesterday that last night would be our last call together, and that I can’t do this distance anymore and we should break up which is why I want a long phone call on the night, but I don’t think he believed me.  This morning I woke up still on the phone to him, hes still asleep on the other end. I sent him a message saying I love him and I’m sorry, then I said goodbye. I blocked his number, deactivated my twitter and Instagram, deleted Snapchat (bc the girl he’s living with uses it) and I’ve just felt empty all day. 
I doubt he’s even noticed that I’m gone. I bet he’s relieved. 
There’s so much more that has been said and done. I just know that it’s going to be like this for the rest of the year if I stay with him and I can’t do that, I feel so suicidal already and I feel like I might just do it. 
Every time I’ve blocked him I’ve always caved but I really don’t want to this time. 
I’ve missed art school all week because I’ve felt so sick and I’ve not been able to sleep because I’ve been up crying or worked up or arguing with him. 
I’m so heartbroken, I loved and cared for him so much. But it doesn’t feel like he feels the same to me anymore. It feels like he’s just picking when to like me, and that’s when he’s alone. 
I begged him to stay for intros week at uni like he did last year but he said he needed to leave on Saturday because he needs to go to the intro lectures but it’s Tuesday now and he hasn’t gone to any. I highly doubt he’s gone to one today. I feel like such a fool. 
I don’t know what to do. How do I make sure not to cave? I feel like time is going so slowly, all I want is for it to be time for bed. I want to die so badly. I feel so spaced out. I’m ruined, I’m absolutely ruined 