When I drop out of highschool I assume my family, mainly my mom, will verbally or physically abuse me but I don't really care anymore. I never had a decent experience at my school.
A few months ago a student made a threat to shoot up the school, what the fuck did the school do? It remained open, and of course, I had to fucking go, they only brought like 2 more police officers into the building and that's it, how fucking amazing.

I'm tired of going to school with people who are too fucking loud for their own good and start fights because why the fuck not, I'm tired of being in a classroom with a teacher who said that it's ok to cut a guy's dick off, and, and I'm fucking tired of useless staff at school not doing anything about my mom being abusive, and I can't defend myself against her because "she's a woman"  Ehat if the fucking genders were reversed?

Even after CPS visited me at my school they just dropped the case, it's been nearly a fucking year since they asked me questions.

I'm tired of my mom being fixatef on school.
And I'm mostly tired of being bothered by people who have nothing better to do with their fucking existence.
Especially my ex-friend who has recently started touching me for her own amusement and invading my privacy. Her friend watches and laughs, again, what if the fucking genders were reversed? Does this bullshit make any sense?

A few days ago, the principal called me to his office to ask me why I wasn't doing my work, I said that my mom was part of the problem and I was becoming unmotivated, he just told me to do my work because "that would make your mom happy"

I'm too fucking tired to actually attempt suicide even after putting knifes to my throat several fucking times. And I don't selfharm that much beside biting my arms until they bleed as a form of letting my anger out instead of punching holes and hitting my head against the walls of my bedroom.

I've been a decent human being to almost everyone, yet I have to endure these people's bullshit does this make any fucking sense whatsoever?

I'm mostly dropping out of highschool to be disowned by my family, that way I can hopefully be killed in the streets or die of starvation there. Bit that id if my mom doesn't try to murder me first but not many would care about that.

I'm trying my fucking hardest to not be pessimistic like the majority of people I've met but it's hard to, and that's why I've been a fucking shut in for most of my life, I'm too fucking tired.