I'm currently 16 when I was 8 or 9 I started getting suicidal thoughts because of some family reasons I was angry all the time and I use to stay calm only with my friends after when I was 11 I stopped getting those thoughts because my family issues were totally gone we all started living happily but when I was  13 age my school got closed I lived in my room alone without meeting any friends and I also can't see my crush who gave my some happiness In this period I got very sad and depressed this feeling of sadness got bigger and bigger I never talk about this to anyone and my dad also left for 2 months because of his job at that time I cried alot after sometime I started going outside got with my friends we had fun I thought my depression was gone but after 6 or 7 months my family shifted to a different state got admission in a new school made some friends but they were not as those old friends my mine my new friends are all toxic and now I'm more depressed than before I stay in my room alone cuz don't want to go outside and see those mfkerz now I can't even cry l feel like those feelings are eat me I'm always angry and sad I've never talked about this to anyone just wanna express this feeling to the people who can understand me I am Ok with this depressed feeling cuz I can't really do anything about this I just put that fake smile while talking with someone and its all empty in my heart and I just want to sleep forever.