Not really sure about the aim of this post, just kinda venting and looking for comfort I guess. I had the worst breakdown in 6 years last night but I managed to call a hotline before I did anything to seriously hurt myself. Tonight I'm feeling the exact same except my active suicidal thoughts have come back in a big way. I just don't feel like I have any future or anyone that cares about me the way I do them. I exhaust myself trying to deal with my illness only to relapse a few days later. I don't see any way out of this endless cycle 