So yeah, I kind of realized it's not doing much for me in terms of mood. I usually take it to unwind or relax a bit at the end of the day or to accompany a meal. I also drink a bit socially. I'm an avid wine drinker but lately, I've been realizing that maybe it's better if I leave it permanently. I'm only 20 but I feel like I could very well just not drink for the rest of my life (well my BPD will probably say otherwise the next time I get offered a drink). I want to get rid of the prospect of having to always have a drink to enjoy something or "have fun". I'm a lightweight, I get full very quickly from just having a drink so it sucks to even accompany it with a meal but I definitely enjoy the feeling. And there's no way you can just smoke a cigarette and not think of having something to drink on the side (even though I'm not a regular smoker either but the times I've tried it are definitely pleasant besides the taste).