i am the oldest of three siblings. i'm 27, my brother is 22 and married and my sister is 13. my parents are in their late 40s, almost 50, and still together. they live about 7 hours away from me. they're pretty much the cookie cutter family - my dad is a first generation mexican american college graduate with a master's under his belt and my mom is also a college graduate with a master's degree. they both work in education and are very involved in their church and community. my sister does all kinds of extra curriculars and my brother also works in the education system and married his high school sweetheart. 

and then there's me. 27, gay, single, exvangelical, managing a coffee shop (which looks like a hobby to most people), heavy marijuana user, slight alcohol dependency, covered in tattoos and piercings. in general, i feel like i stick out like a sore thumb. my parents tried to be good parents but they couldn't handle me. i was too much all around. they couldn't come to terms with my sexuality for a long time, and that coupled with a lot of shame and neglect and facing most obstacles alone and an alcohol addiction + sexual abuse during my formative years is what lead to my bpd. 

we have a good relationship now, but it mostly feels like we're friends. i talk to my mom somewhat regularly but that's it. most of the time i call her by her first name. i hardly talk to my siblings or my dad. i say i care about them bc i know i should but i really dread when i visit them or they visit me. i'm much more concerned with being around my friends. 

is this normal for people with bpd?