It may sound weird but when I was 15(18 now) I knowingly chose to have an eating disorder. Looking back on it it seems really fucked up but I eventually got anorexia when I didn’t really mean it. I started to lose weight and I just couldn’t stop anymore eventually I was so obsessed that I started to have boulimia too. I have to add that my personality is really really decisive and obsessive once I have an idea in my mind. Luckily I am recovered now (however the calories always hurt and bad food is always stressing me) but I still find myself in having very obsessive thoughts. Once day I am EXTREMELY happy and the next day I can’t even move to get out of my bed. I can be very mad and angry and two hours later I will jump and dance around. Is there something wrong with me for this behavior? I never felt like I needed help because I ‘chose’ for it.