My mom is having surgery next week. She’s older and suffers from a lot of health issues. I’m worried about her being put under and anything that could go wrong in recovery. If I’m being honest and blunt I’m scared I’ll lose her due to this surgery and thats the first time I’ve ever said that “out loud.” 

It’s weird because I don’t think about it 24/7 but I’m still anxious as can be. I try to suppress it but I’ve been waking up everyday with a pit in my stomach and worry in my chest. I literally feel like my insides are trembling. My stomach is so upset. 

It’s just crazy how much I’ve tried to suppress thinking about it but my body won’t allow me to not worry about it.