After wondering for a while if I was bipolar or something, I stumbled upon BPD online several weeks ago. After reading a bunch about it, I felt like it really accurately described me. Like I finally found an explanation for the way I am.

I finally got to see my doctor, which of course I used the opportunity to bring up my suspected BPD. I'm pretty certain I have BPD to an extent, so I was kind of taken aback about how the appointment unfolded. After talking about the person who I believe to be my current FP, the doctor basically said that unless I had desires to kill my FP or myself, or were drastically changing my appearance between appointments, that I don't fit the profile. He said people with BPD are just that extreme, and that you can spot them from a mile away. I've never had any intention or desire to hurt my FP, and of course, I kind of have to downplay any desires to harm myself at appointments, because I don't want to get gooned. So I received no diagnosis or any changes to medication or anything like that.

I know we're not supposed to seek a diagnosis on here, so I'm not really sure why I'm posting this. I just feel really lost and confused right now. Almost like I'm not being taken seriously.