I'm just trying to figure what I'm going through. Whenever I feel the relationship is starting to get bit more serious from the flirting stage to the next one almost like comitment stage. I chicken out in the sense I find it hard to fall asleep or I'm just so much emotionally involved with them I forget to take care of myself, my sleep, my appetite goes down or is this love? it happens subconsciously. I'm also obsessed with them I need to remind myself to slow down.

I start to become a wreck all this even before I'm in a serious relationship. It also hurts I feel I drive people away when they want to be with me. I'm being vulnerable and open about what I'm going through I still feel guilty of putting them through my misery. I hope to work through this but I feel like running away since I haven't slept well in like a week. I feel like I don't have control over me