I’m posting this and I’m at a friends party. Like 25 people around me and I’m completely numb. I’ve had a lot of people die that I’ve known and I’m gonna lose another. Looks like my grandpas going soon with cancer. I also nearly lost a friend I care about before coming here. I only showed up as I didn’t want to let the host down. Never felt so hollow and empty. 

Sorry for the rant