Well since I was 13 I was drinking alcohol, not every day, but most of weekends, until I was drunk, trying not to feel my emotions, and feel "good"

Since I was 14 I started to smoke cigarettes (Still doing it, is the only thing I'm addicted now)

When I was 18 I started to smoke weed, EVERYDAY, I used to go eveywhere high AF, even at my workplace. Because I felt better, and didn't think about my issues...

I quit to smoke for a whole year, but then, problems with my ex boy, my family, and ofc Deppression and anxiety made me smoke and drink again, felt pretty good, but without it, life seems to be disgusting (*at this point, I wasn't diagnose, so you can see how I was trying to cope with my overwhelming situations on a daily basis)*.

I was diagnosed with BPD after 8 months of therapy, 1 psychiatrist and 2 psychologists when I was at my 21's.

After a while, I realized I was addicted to weed, and even though people see weed like is not harming, In people wBPD or any sort of mental illness it could be **different**...

So, I was addicted, and used to smoke at least 2gr a day, and I quit to drink, bc I don't like to be wasted.  
Problems again, I moved to my momma's house, I started to take prozac, a week later had some sort of side effects (Anxiety and Panick attacks with physical hallucinations, diarrhea and nausea, *it could be the beginning of PTSD CPTSD after physical and emotional abuse, we still figuring out, but, as it was 8 days since I started to take Prozac, and never felt like this, I can say it was side effects*) I QUIT TO TAKE PILLS TOO BC I'M SCARED OF GOING THROUGH THAT SITUATION AGAIN I FELT PRETTY BAD!!!

And now I have almost 5 months sober, NO ALCOHOL WEED NOR PILLS

I'm not gonna say I'm perfect now, but I feel way much better.  
And I'm copying with my symptoms by reading, writting, listening to music (different playlists for different moods), drawing, eating (ENJOYING FOOD, NEW FLAVORS, COOKING, etc), 0 social media scrolling (I uninstalled Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tik Tok from my phone) and talking in support groups, here or in Telegram.

**What about you guys?**

***Thanks for reading me, I'm improving my english by writting, reading and listening.***