I'm a female (late 20s) with, at the very least, traits of BPD. I've not been diagnosed, mainly due to not feeling "ready" to seek therapy. I've done a lot of my own research and identify with so many symptoms and issues... however, one thing I can't seem to wrap my head around is people who "run away" or otherwise distance themselves from another person when they feel they've gotten too close or exposed too much of themselves. I understand it relates to the fear of abandonment and wanting to leave before being left, so I guess my question is, for people who actually feel that way, is that really the thought process behind it? If you met someone who you truly connected with and felt comfortable getting "close" to in the moment, would you feel the need to run for the hills? And if you did, would you even want the other person to reach out to you after the fact?

I feel like I'm the opposite. When I meet someone I connect with (extreme rarity), I feel so relieved to meet someone who gets me and I don't want to run. I might do some stupid shit later on to sabotage the relationship, but running just isn't an option to me. 