I don't know if I officially am dealing with BPD but from my own research it is a high probability.

Constantly feel like I am in constant tug-of-war with my "other" self.  I have a very marketable skill set and a book of project and creative ideas that I personally feel are good ideas ( I mean why wouldn't I ).  I start one and spend a good month or so going full into developing an idea and then like a switch I seem to not be able to focus on that idea and start focusing on another.  

I tend to always cycle through the same ideas, often restarting the development cycle because the idea has evolved by the time I returned. 

I also can't help that my job further triggers this due to having very little fulfillment  along with dealing high levels of stress and triggers of extreme frustration where I spend at least a day or two working to calm myself down from something.

I am often tempted to just quit and spending a year figuring things out and devoting time to developing to my ideas if at minimum to build out a portfolio of my own which I don't really have right now. 

However, I can't help think that this is just wishful thinking and the year would be wasted.  So now I'm basically paralyzed with over analyzing all this and do nothing but think and wish as I continue to do the same thing day to day that leads to nothing real.

Anyway, just wanted to write this out a bit and share and thought what better place then here.  Hope you all are having a good holiday.