I (18F) started college a few weeks ago and made a few friends! I went to public school my first year of high school and then the other 3 were spent online. Once I switched schools I cut off everyone I knew due to severe depression so havent had an irl friend in 3 years. 

I didnt exactly have the experiences you're supposed to have in high school. What I'm more focusing on right now is the fact that ive never been drunk or high and Im a virgin... like never even kissed someone kind of virgin and I am absolutely HUMILIATED by all of these things. Two of my friends have openly talked about being drunk/high and their sex lives multiple times and I know it's only a matter of time before they ask me a question about one of those things. I've already created an elaborate backstory for how I lost my virginity and all the people I've been with and I've also created stories about times I've been drunk or high. 

Since these anxieties have been brought up ive been sobbing, freaking out, and having near anxiety attacks (I'm on propranol so it stops actual anxiety attacks... absolute life saver) on and off because I'm worried my stories won't sound real and I'll be caught in a lie. I cry so damn easily, use anger as a mask, and prefer to simply not deal with my problems so I know if I am caught I'll avoid them at all costs and be a complete dick if they even try to talk to me... I REALLY dont want that to happen since I finally have friends. I'm just so stressed and anxious and i dont know what to do