Not a call, text, email, DM, voicemail, nothing. I could've been dead. I haven't talked to anyone in eight months, basically. 

I'm still in high school and I just moved schools for the ninth and final time. No behavioral issues, just poverty. My parents treated me well, I just couldn't handle the immense pain of abandonment.

I tried to make a friend last week and we talked for three hours nonstop. Two days later she politely said we shouldn't be friends because I was too needy. I always ruin it.

I'm fucking numb. Over quarantine I lost 50 pounds, became a healthy person, and learned self control. I am a better person, but it has not made me any happier. At all. 

It sucks because I know I'm a good friend. People have told me I'm incredibly sweet and a joy to talk to. I absolutely love making people happy. I just can't prove it, because I have no reputation anywhere and no idea how to show it without saying it. I just want someone to love me :(