Tw// time, death ment 

This is so dumb, but sometimes (most of the time) I don't understand the concept of time. I don't know what 5min, 1 hour or a year feels like. I'm not a very good judge of it. 

I usually solve this problem with a calender, timers, reminders and things like that. And so far I've been fairly good about it. It's been manageable. 

However, I woke up this morning with a terrible feeling. I am 23 and I will only live to my 70s-80s. I've been under the impression that life ends when I've done the things. Once I graduate college, I will get a home a few years later with my cool career. Then have partner(s). Then children. But that's not how it works. 

I will graduate college at 28. Maybe get my career job at 30+. And I won't have enough time to pay off loans before buying a house. So by the time I get a house and be financially ready for kids I'll be like 50 years old. 

All this to say, our system is fucked, I hate it here and I'm glad I realized that I will, in fact, not be living hundreds of years. This blows lol