This is my first post on reddit so I don’t really know what i’m doing, anyways. Has anyone else dated someone who ended up becoming a very extreme FP and then after breaking up you still have them in the back of your head just needing to please them even if they aren’t in your life anymore? I stopped talking to him officially two weeks ago and been broken up for over a month but i’m having a very hard time just trying to be “myself” without trying to please the version of him in my head. it’s like he’s there judging me and hating me and i need to please him constantly. I’m trying to move on from A) my first real relationship and B) a very horribly emotional FP and it makes it so much harder that i can’t be with other people casually or seriously without feeling like nobody is good enough because he would think they aren’t. or would he be mad at me for moving on? it’s ridiculous and unrealistic because the relationship caused me so much shame and grief but i still feel the need to please him so maybe he will love me. I don’t even want to BE with him anymore but i want him to accept me and love me and want me. i don’t know. having him in the back of my head controlling my life is making everything so much harder to move on from. i still try to appease his insecurities and wants by making them my insecurities and wants. How do i move on from an FP i dated especially when he’s constantly in the back of my head judging and me needing to please him still? I’ve never had an FP i was this attached to and moving on is so much more difficult than i expected it would be.