(i dont feel like doing a throwaway, might delete later or not idk)

idk i just always felt like not killing myself because of how much it could affect people around me but, my own mom just told me if i died she would be sad for the first weeks, then by one year she would be over it, so idk, might grief is not such a powerful thing like i thought. 

Maybe if i kms everyone i know will just be sad at the start then get over it a month later, maybe thats even a good thing for both of us.