I'm not sure why I'm even writing this honestly, I think I kinda need to vent.

Me and my gf had some problems the last few months, we barely talked bcs I was always kinda distant, and so was she. For a long time I wanted to break up with her bcs I understood that I didn't liked her in that way but I was always scared of being alone so I kinda clinged to her for a while.

Last week we broke up, it was a mutual thing but I still feel like I made a wrong decision, I miss her and I feel even more alone and suicidal, expecially since I can't even go to therapy rn bcs of quarantine and my suicidal thoughts are getting worst. I'm don't know what to do