I’ve had a rough childhood and I have mental issues. One of my conditions is I have a lot of anxiety. The problem is I don’t love anybody, not even my mom. I used to but now I can’t even if I tried. My friends are good guys but I feel so detached to them. I know my mom loves me but I dont. Because of my childhood I have some trusting and relationships issues. I’ve never had a real gf because of that and I can’t be sure of the emotions of someone. For example I can’t differentiate someone who’s mad or happy. For example, the other day I was in this place where this guy was delivering a speech and suddenly he screaming and starting swearing. Then he stopped and everybody started laughing cause turns out he was joking, but I had not realized it. I’m never sure. I was uncomfortable the rest of his speech, while everybody was perfectly fine. Seeing sad people doesn’t even make me feel anything. I want to love and be loved but I can’t bring myself to go further than flirting when it gets serious and I end up not talking to them anymore.