First of al I'm only thirteen so sorry if I worded this crudely. I don't want to sound like some cringy edge Lord little kid but i can't stop thinking about death. I don't think I'm depressed but It doesn't go away. I believe when I die, I will just have not existed and i won't be able to think or anything. The thought of that utterly terrifies me and i can't seem to escape it. I feel it all the time but it gets much worse when I am trying to fall asleep. I think anything I do is pointless because It will not matter eventually. It's not like i wanna die, but i don't wanna live forever. If I could live forever living the same life as   am now that would be good. I don't want to have not existed in the first place, but i don't like the fact that i am just living to die. I don't want to turn to faith or anything. And i don't want to go to a counselor. Pls don't baby me either, i wouldn't say I'm mature for my age but I don't like reading people acting like I'm a little kid (even if I am). I just want someone who has experienced something similar and got out of it to tell me how. I don't know why i am writing this on Reddit but this is the only thing I could think of.