I'll start by stating that I've had anxiety for a long time. I've been unable to afford medication for a bit over 3 years now due to lack of insurance. I try to cope with all my feelings of uncertainty and doubt but I mainly end up just sleeping too much. To the main point.

A bit over 5 years ago I was visiting my sister's house away from home and my best friend since middle school just stopped talking to me for no reason. Like fell off the face of the Earth type stopped talking to me. Blocked on every possible point of contact. He moved and had his family/friends I knew not give me any information on his whereabouts. It still upsets me.

Over the next three years I continued to visit my sister's house and twice potential relationships(a few dates in without real commitment) out of the blue told me they had seriously started seeing someone else and were breaking off from any contact with me. I understood this because we hadn't been super serious yet although that's where I was hoping to go with it and it hurt a bit. But it was still weird that it occured while I was staying at my sister's house.

Then last year I was in a serious and happy relationship with someone for over 5 months. There had been discussion of moving in together and I was at one of the highest points in my life. But because I had the previous experiences at my sister's house, I had a really bad feeling when I was invited over for the weekend to hang out. Sure enough my significant other broke things off. They stated they were seeing someone else and had been for over a month. I was super confused and sad and they refused to give me any real closure as to why things were broke off.

Fast forward to right now. I moved out of state and getting away from a lot of bad experiences helped my anxiety. But now I'm back at my sister's house visiting so I can attend a family wedding nearby. I feel horrible. Like I'm constantly going to throw up because I know something is going to happen while I'm here. I was dreading my arrival on the flight over. I've been here over a day and things are getting worse. I'm oversleeping and have no appetite and even the wedding activities coming up aren't a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I'm probably overreacting and I shouldn't be on edge but I can't help it. Does anyone have any thoughts or advice on how I might be able to separate myself from the situation? I've tried going on walks away from the house but I don't have a way to actually drive away unless I'm getting a ride from my sister. I'm looking forward to the moment I leave to fly home but I feel like my sister can tell and she feels bad but doesn't know why I'm like this. Anything helps.