I have been with my fiancé for almost five years. We’ve had our ups and downs but I thought overall we’ve been doing okay. Well, starting about two weeks ago everything went to shit. He went out with his friends and when they got back to his friends house, his friend approached my fiancé and talked to him about how he didn’t feel that he and I shouldn’t be together. He came home that night, drunk, and told me what had been said which caused a huge fight. Over the next few days things were hard but I thought we were going to move past it. I was hurt because I thought this person was also my friend so I asked to meet up. When we meet up, the conversation almost immediately dives into what they think are my faults in the relationship and why I shouldn’t be with him. I was upset and left. The next days things got progressively worse and ends with my fiancé going to stay with his parents. He is saying I’m emotionally abusive, and that is the hardest thing to hear. I never thought I was. All I thought I was doing was loving him. As it turns out though I wasn’t listening to his feelings, shutting him down. This is all a slap in the face to me because I don’t feel that way but he does so I don’t have any right to say any different. 

We were talking everyday since he left but now he wants space to think about things and to try and figure out how to set boundaries with me, but he doesn’t even know if he’s going to stay. 

What would you do? How would you compose yourself? I’m an emotional wreck and I only just started DBT and I don’t know any skills.