existing feels so scary. i feel like i'm only safe if i'm home in my bed, and even then i panic because of thoughts like "what if someone will break in" or "what if this food i ate will make me sick", etc. sometimes it only takes a "nothing is okay, something is wrong" and i'm a mess.

what if nothing will ever be okay? what if i'll be scared forever? i have to go on a road trip with my friends in a week, i'm gonna panic so much. i'm so tired of being scared. i wish i could just relax. but what if something goes wrong? being away from home feels scary. what if i get sick when i'm away from home? being around anyone but my parents is tiring. what if i'll get too tired? i wish i could stay inside all my life. noises are scary, people are scary, being outside is scary, eating is scary, trying to take care of myself is scary, living is scary. i can't cope. i'm constantly afraid and sometimes i don't even know why.