 Hi, My(27m) wife(24f) recently got a diagnosis as BPD and it has explained a lot of things.    
I am at a complete loss of what to do, the verbal abuse is non stop. I am belittled and put down at every turn for every minor indiscretion whether real or imagined. When I have the audacity to get worked up over being yelled or ranted at for spilling a drink or waking a baby accidentally, I am immediately met with a "I'm above this and better than you" attitude and have to start begging for forgiveness because the fight shifts from what she's done, to my reaction being the focus and the only thing that matters.  


She's in a research study for a new drug for BPD (no therapy)  and is convinced that because she is medicated she is 100% on the level and any mention of her bpd making her act out is ridiculous.   


I have strong feeling that her BPD is not in control as there still seems to be heavy splitting. we go from her treating me well and talking to our baby about "what a good daddy he has" to her telling me that I'm a scumbag deadbeat dad and the worst parent she could imagine and a sexual predator because I got upset we didn't have sex for 3 months.

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I'm at my wits end, I love my wife and love my family and don't want to lose it. My self confidence is shattered, my mental health is in tatters and I'm not sure I can survive this much longer.    what do i do?

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I apologize for the jumbled mess of a post, but I just moved states and don't have anyone to talk to about this to get an outside perspective.