Hi everyone, to provide context: I (M23) have struggled with GAD and social anxiety pretty much my whole life. In August 2021, I decided to get back into therapy. 

My biweekly virtual therapy sessions (that I usually have in my bathroom in order to get some privacy for my sessions) usually take the following format: I share what I did that weekend, I talk about what made me anxious over the past week, and my therapist reinforces the cognitive behavioral therapy model (challenge negative thoughts before they become emotions). For example, if I have anxiety about speaking up at work, she would encourage me to be prepared with something to say, practice grounding techniques (like identify 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, etc.) and breathing exercises, and remind myself of how since I’m the youngest on my team, the expectations for me aren’t as high as the others who have more experience. 

However, I feel like my sessions are too “high level,” and I’m not sure if it’s because of me or because of my therapist. Although mental illness can run in the family (like anxiety in my case), I’ve heard how anxiety can also be learned behavior. So, during sessions, I thought my therapist would be asking more questions about my childhood, or where these feelings of anxiety, shyness, or inadequacy could come from, or help me unpack or reflect on things I haven’t thought about before, as opposed to treating me like I’m simply anxious for anxiety’s sake.

So, I guess my question(s) are around the following: how can I make the most out of my therapy sessions? How do I make the shift from surface level to going deeper and addressing the roots of my anxiety, unpacking why I have those anxious thoughts? Generally speaking, how do you guys usually approach therapy sessions/what format does it usually take (to the extent to which you’re comfortable sharing)? Any and all responses are appreciated.