i fell out with two of my best friends at the height of my BPD wrecking my life. I had a diagnosis in psych; BPD, bipolar 2, PTSD and anxiety. i kinda made everything about me, pushed all my feelings into everyone else when i didn’t understand them. I was an all around shit show to be around. 

i just apologized to my two best friends. one i don’t want to speak with but i owed him an apology because he took me in when i was homeless and i feel i’ve been shitty to him in so many ways. 

i have my days...but i feel half normal now. I feel okay. I feel when i need to cry. I process my emotions now and can communicate them. My therapist helped me to just sit with them so i can understand them as much as it hurts sometimes. it feels nice. i’m grateful. 

i post this i guess in hopes that this DBT continues to help cuz i still have a ways to go. but almost 5-6 months from being out of psych, i’ve made such an improvement. i’m gonna cry happy tears now. ok bye