I just wanted to provide a bit of context surrounding my experience in order to receive the best advice. (Note: I had been experiencing about a year of physical abuse by my cousin before the sexual assault happened):

Me and my cousin were playing in his parents room when he dragged me into his parents closet, turned off the lights, and locked the door. I was confused as he told me to take my clothes off. Obviously I resisted and started crying as he pulled my pants down and ripped my shirt over my head. After that, he took his clothes off as and pinned me to the ground with his naked body on top of me. I was crying and pleading with him to stop but he just kept telling me to submit or he'd hurt me (like he always did with the physical abuse). I knew he was capable of hurting me based on past experiences so I just layed there and cried as he rubbed his private part up and down the length of my body. I don't really remember anything that happened afterwards, and it was years later that I even remembered this happened to me. 

One thing I am ashamed of as a part of this experience is that it didnt seem to affect me as much as the people I've read about online. They say that this type of trauma comes with a lifelong process of healing, but it didnt seem to affect me like i feel like it should have. Is it wrong that I'm asking if this is sexual abuse even though there are many people who struggle with it on a daily basis and have it way worse than me? I remember being terrified in the moment but I feel dumb for even considering this experience a trauma as it doesnt really seem to affect me anymore.

One more question: should I be worried about him reoffending? I havent told any of my family and me and my cousin still hang out like nothing happened. He is also pretty nice to me now. Should I still be cautious around him or should I forgive and forget?