Every once in a while, all the shit in my life gets too overbearing and I'm just stuck in this rut of misery and self pity. I hate the way I look, I'm failing exams, I feel like I'm too stupid to even bother to study for them, I take my boyfriend watching porn too personally (he only does it when we're not together for a while and he simply needs the visual aid and I don't even blame him because so do I), and so on.

I just need a burst of motivation that I can change those things. I can get the body I like with time, I can focus better on studying, I can realize that my boyfriend watching porn sometimes is completely fine and normal, etc. But it's just difficult to pull myself together like that.