Wish I could choose more than one flair haha

So I recently discovered the power of venting. Tbh I've lurked and even posted a few times on this sub, for a long time now. This is a new account, but that's a whole different story. As I got older and made more progress, I reached a point where I no longer liked to read posts here. When I read many of the posts people make here, I saw the old me and it made me upset, angry even. Part of me even wanted to do the text equivalent of yelling at some of you guys. In particular it upset me that so many people come here with problems and but their goal is not to get better. They think they are already defeated.

I understand now the power of validating, and just listening. It's okay feel stuff, even really bad stuff because it's there for a reason. I think the reason reading posts on this sub made me so upset, is I was still figuring this out. I saw everyone's problems, and it was like a whirlwind of my own thoughts manifesting themselves on the screen. Thoughts that I have tried very hard to suppress. Now when I see people say things like "there is no hope" or "I'll never get better," I try and remember that I used to feel the same way, and I still do sometimes, and it's okay to feel that way. I'm not saying I really believe that, but it's okay to feel hopeless.

This probably sounds very ironic coming from someone with BPD. Some of your are undoubtedly thinking "How can you have BPD, and not understand how important validation is?" Well, of course I understood, and still do, it's just that suppressing my feelings is kind of a big problem for me right now. I used to be the typical pwBPD, but I guess you could say it hurt too much, so I stopped. It wasn't healthy, and no I'm not all better, and yes there is more to the story. I still empathize greatly with all of you.

tl;dr I'm not sure what my point was here, but I'm sure there is a lesson in there somewhere lol. Maybe I just felt a need to share my growth with someone, since I don't have anyone except my parents to talk to. Maybe someone else will learn gain something from it? I hope so.