I made a long post about her last night. I'm not in love with her but I thought I was and she lead me to believe there might be a chance for almost two months before practically abandoning me for two weeks just to tell me she found someone else. That was two weeks ago and we haven't spoken since. I told her I needed time. A week ago yesterday she messaged me and said she still cares about me and always will. I didn't respond. I've wanted to. I only planned on taking a few days, even though I didn't tell her that. I have so much to say to her and I want to give her the chance to make things right and explain to me why she lied to me about not wanting a relationship. But I haven't been able to. I've accepted that she's just my favorite person and I'm not in love with her. Hell, she's missing some important qualities I want in a relationship and the thought of kissing her or sleeping with her doesn't feel right. But the idea of her doing that with someone else? That's pure agony. I keep replaying things she said about him and feeling so inadequate, so ugly and not good. Like he must be so much better than me if she wants him in those ways and not me. I don't want to feel this way. I just don't know how to cope.