This title sounds like some angry teenager wrote it, and there's nothing wrong with that either, but I'm 26 years old. And I often feel this way. Just unexplainable anger and frustration. In those moments just violence goes through my head. Something or someone triggers me usualy, and I am angry or bitchy for a few minutes. I used to be much worse, I used to start a gigantic fight and pull out all kinds of irrelevant problems in that moment. And then the violent pictures and scenes start going through my mind. Now I start some argument and say a few mean things that I usualy don't even mean, and then I shut up and keep being silent or else I would make things even worse. But then, I suffer so much pain, anger issues and total chaos inside. And I think It's fine because if anyone must feel that way or listen to those things It better be me than anybody else. The worst thing is that I'm afraid I'll loose my boyfriend, and I love him deeply. But he also makes me mad. But it seems like everyone makes me mad so what's the difference. And if I have a problem with everyone then I'm the problem right? I'm a problem to myself and then consequently others. Best way to explain this problem is: everyone gets on my nerves and I have all this hate twoards everything, but I know I'm the blame, I know that at the end it's my own fault. Sometimes I feel petty for myself, and I seek some support, but mostly I feel angry with myself and from that frustration I become a menace to others. I am diagnosed with bpd and some other issues (depression being the most draining and intense) but I was not on some long clinical treatment so I'm not even sure if that is really my diagnosis. And for a long I didn't care. But now I feel so unbareably angry too much of the time that I feel I need to really become more aware do I really have a disorder or am I just a mean selfish 'crazy bitch'? And I don't have anyone to talk to, not because I literally DON'T HAVE anybody, but because I don't want to burden anyone with this or make unconfortable or worried. I also have a psychotherapist (not a psychiatrist, I went to one also and they gave me that bpd diagnosis, but the woman I go to now doesn't want us to 'label' me or my problems) that I go to once a week and she helped me but I feel like even she can't understand. She's pretty timid, kinda fragile, speaks quietly and soothingly and that is nice but sometimes I think I need someone a bit tougher. And I switched so many of them I feel stupid to change a therapist again because then we have to start the whole story over.... Sorry for the long post, its half vent but also half wondering does anyone relate and have some thoughts?