I was diagnosed with BPD during a hospital stay in 2014. My behavior at that point was impulsive and self destructive. I'd mix benzos and alcohol and pass out on the floor, leaving my sister to drag my carcass to bed in the morning. I texted my parents suicide notes. I took my meds sporadically. I vented about how suicidal I was to my friends endlessly. I cut myself and ended up in the ER over and over again.

People say that if someone loves you, you're never a burden to them. That's not accurate. It's a burden they don't mind carrying. But one day I realized, why make them carry that burden at all?

I went to therapy for 5 years during grad school. I did DBT and EMDR and group therapy. I found a med combination that worked and stuck to it. I learned coping mechanisms and boundaries so the self destruction stopped. 

It's been hard. But I realized that it was not anyone else's job to take care of me, and that they deserved to be released from the worry, fatigue, and frankly abuse that I inflicted on them.

Change is possible, even with BPD. I'm a fully functional person now with no symptoms of mental illness. It took years but I'm glad I did the work.