my dad died almost one month ago and i feel like no ones understand what im going through and expects me to act normal, I try everyday to do things to distract myself but everyday i feel worse, sometimes i think im not even crying for my loss, i really can’t stop.. when i wake up i cry and then in the night i cried myself to sleep. I don’t want to be with anyone and at the same time i want to be perceived. I don’t get what is happening i’ve never ever been so sad in my whole life, i don’t want to live. Everything i do or try to do for someone seems to be wrong or badly done. I have always had good self- esteem but now anyone can call me ugly as a joke and i would get mad and think for it for the rest of the day, i just want it to stop. Shit hurts like a mf.