Everytime she explosively reacts, I shut down and cowar. I think she is also half quiet because those times are rare but when it happens I split instantly. I really try to look past those times but everytime I remember them I just begin to hate her.

If you correct her, she'll be like "RAWRR IM NOT STUPID"but I think shes very intelligent. One of the smartest ppl i know even. Shes explained so many obvious things to me that I obviously already knew bc she will tell me 5 times. And Ill literally say yes i get it.

I have actually two friends like this lmao. Only one of them knows I'm a quiet borderline so I guess i can't blame one of them for not toning it down.

Sometimes she reminds me of my dad w npd. Only when it comes to intelligence tho. She literally thinks shes always right. If i tell her shes wrong about smth and I'm right she kind of just retracts and gets visibly ashamed. Which I'm not judging her for, I'm the same if its around someone who overly cares about intelligence or i don't trust them. Since I'm a people pleaser I always just agree that shes always right and I do genuinely feel bad the few times I've corrected her and was right. I just wish she wouldn't blow up at me over stupid things. Like she will literally gasp if you don't know smth. 

The other one sort of just has the attitude of im always right not that they actually believe that and they always come around. Like they just leave when they are too angry and then come back and apologise and be like okay i can be calm now.

I know i need to be more understanding. Those two have bpd too, and I do literally understand the way they feel but it just upsets me so much. I don't want to be weak and retract but I don't want to be aggressive either. I don't want to give anyone the space to push me around