I’ve felt like I’ve been in a constant state of anxiety and depression for the past couple of months and lately it’s just really been amped up and hard to cope with. Almost debilitating, I’m having a hard time leaving the house. Hard time leaving the couch tbh, it’s so pathetic. 

Working nightshift and I’ve been averaging 1.5-4 hr “naps” it feels like because I haven’t gotten a full 8 hour sleep in a while. It’s such a double edged sword, I’ll call out for a mental health day, then feel guilty for calling out, and in turn the anxiety just skyrockets even higher because now I’m worried what my peers will think. I’m letting them down too. 

I started therapy yesterday, I haven’t been in it for over 6 years but I’m so desperate to try anything. 

I feel guilty, as though I’m letting my partner down. Emotionally, and physically, because I can’t seem to regulate these feelings. 

My work and school performance are shit rn and it’s so hard to see a future plan for myself right now. More uninspired than anything. 

This probably should’ve just been posted in r/offmychest but if you’ve read this thank you. Basically everything just feels like a tornado rn