i can't sleep. 
I'm waiting for someone to reply to a message I sent asking for forgiveness for panicking and wanting to leave.

the cycle repeats itself. an ocean of uninteresting people. 
I find one I like, I let myself get too attached. paranoia all around, telling me this person doesn't like me at all.
I get the urge to do something, I need to make a change. I decide to end the relationship because i concluded the other person doesn't love me.
i can't deal with it.
I go back. beg for forgiveness.
silence.

empty.

go out to fill myself with faceless people.
cycle begins again