I realised a few weeks ago that I lack a stable sense of self and the response from everywhere was to embrace the ambiguity and take my time with it. I realise now though that I infact have a very poor sense of self and view myself with a lot of shame. If I create a false self I'll always be in competition with others around me, but I don't know who to be individually without feeling constantly inferior. How to care for myself and not be unkind. I have been actively working to increase skills and self esteem but it's not really about that. The shame and guilt persists.  I feel that the identity was a mask for my feelings. Where do they go?