Long story short: fell head over heels for a guy again, he wanted to take things slowly, I want to be with him now. Since I cannot be his friend right now, I decided to step back instead of hurting myself more (yay, I guess) and now I feel nothing.
My current coping mechanism is feeling nothing, no anger, no sadness, no joy, nothing. Just a void. 
I used to rant and vent and cry and throw tantrums but now I just seem to shut down.
I honestly don't know what's worse.

Just wanted to share this. Maybe someone is the same.