(just venting to the void, i’m in therapy and medicated)

just yesterday i was feeling so damn good and at one point i was happier than i’ve been in a long time. and today is just the most crushing dip i’ve had in a while.  

i hate when i dip because i feel like i start to lose my mind.  i get so anxious, extremely insecure, and over think every single thing. i feel like i’m not even myself, just this weird grey feeling.  i feel so alone. existence is painful. i hate it here.