My wife and I have a friend who we have known for awhile now -- about 4 years.  Although, we only ever see her over the summer when we're in town.  We were recently talking and got onto the topic of BPD, and she told us she was diagnosed with BPD as a young adult.  I was shocked, because I never suspected, and I'm fairly informed about BPD.  Many years ago, my sister told me I was probably borderline myself.  After reading much about it, and talking to a therapist, I realized my sister is just retarded, and I'm not a borderline at all.  I call her retarded, because she's not a trained professional, and my therapist was really pissed off that some layperson was trying to diagnose personality disorders based on some book she read.  Till this day, because of my sister, I still learn about BPD via YouTube just to understand it better.  Anyways, getting back to our friend, we talked a bit about it, how she was diagnosed, how she went to group therapy, how she had DBT therapy and meds and that now, she is much better.  It wasn't until a few days later, I saw all the old keyloid scars on her arm and legs from all the cutting she did.  There were a ton of them up and down her one arm.  However, they were fairly light and blended in with her skin, that it's no wonder I never noticed them before.

I think that's when it struck me that she was likely a borderline.  She was largely abandoned by her biological parents, as they divorced and moved on to form new families.  She was like the child that was kicked back and forth, never being loved or wanted.  She strongly suspects her mother is a narcissist as well, and I'm sure that hasn't been easy to grow up with.  But, I think the biggest sign to me was the cutting and self harm behavior.  She was hospitalized for psychosis, I believe, and that's why they threw her into group therapy.  

I'm just wondering, for those who are diagnosed BPD, have you guys been hospitalized for self harm behaviors or due to some psychotic episode?  I'm beginning to wonder if this is likely the key "red flag" for a diagnosis.