I've always suffered from low-level anxiety with peaks for some reason (or none) throughout my life.  I skipped weeks of middle school because I couldn't face getting assignments done,  quit highschool half way through the senior year for some stupid mistake that gave me super anxiety, managed to get a college degree but took that down to the wire.  Have been 'high functioning' but burning myself out for 10 years and just about riding the wave,  but over the last 18 months I've completely lost to it.  Anxiety finally has me cornered and I have to actually face up to it for the first time in my life.

I quit a job of 4 years over feelings of anxiety and low self esteem,  found another job,  and stuck that out for less than a year and a half before getting to the same place, and skipped out for another job.  Now I'm 9 months into the new job and this time it's hit me harder than ever before just before the christmas,  palpatations, sleeping on the sofa most days, not looking after my physical health (I can't remember what day I put the clothes on that I'm wearing right now), gained LOADS of weight and suffering chronic tension headaches, just feel like my personality has washed away.  
It's finally caught up with me before I could run away again, I've missed days at work, becoming cynical and procrastinating.  I'm supposed to be travelling to a work event right now,  but couldn't bring myself to leave the house, for the (once) rational fear that being alone in a hotel room hundreds of miles from home is a really fucking bad idea right now.

I have signed up for a therapy course (but it starts in 5 working days and is a webinar once per week) so tomorrow I'm calling my doctor to ask for some more immediate help.  The thought of telling work I'm ill, and asking for help just makes the anxiety 100% worse.