On mobile, sorry if formatting is bad.

I’ve been with my girlfriend for almost a year now, and she’s the best thing in my life. I haven’t had a FP in almost four years, after they left me. It was agonizing, the worst pain I’ve gone through. I was happy without a FP, I felt more healthy and stable?

..Until I got a new FP. 
When I first met them, I didn’t think they would become my FP. I started to notice about a month ago when my thinking turned black and white about them. I think about them constantly, they just always drift into my mind somehow. Seeing a text from them in the morning would make my day. Their change in tone would cause my mood to fall, getting into triggering topics I won’t mention. I haven’t spoken to them in four days (they’ve been unreachable) and I’ve just felt so empty and useless.

I love my girlfriend, and we have a great relationship. I’m not in love with my FP, it’s like a platonic almost-obsession and idolization. But I’m scared I’ve just been using her since she’s not my FP, and if I told anyone mostly everyone in my life would leave. I don’t know what to do.

Does anyone else have a FP that isn’t their partner? Is this okay, or am I using one of them?