i feel so out of control. early 2021 was the worst my mental health has ever been, and i can feel myself going back to how i was then. 

i thought i was getting better, i’ve been trying so hard recently and it just feels like nothing has payed off and i’ve struggled for no reason. 

it’s 4:27am where i’m from and i can’t sleep and my mind is just racing because of anxiety. i’m quite suicidal too but i’m just so so scared