I am pacing and tapping_x000D_
Biting and sighing_x000D_
When I feel a wave of nausea_x000D_
Amidst the labored breathing_x000D_
_x000D_
I've been through this before_x000D_
I've conquered too many episodes to count_x000D_
I keep telling myself it's all in my mind_x000D_
But my mind never listens and my heart carelessly pounds_x000D_
_x000D_
I was just taking a bath_x000D_
Like all baths I've taken before_x000D_
When the sudden thought of sudden death_x000D_
Suddenly barged into my door_x000D_
_x000D_
What if the earth got swallowed by a black hole_x000D_
What if an asteroid hit in the very moment_x000D_
What if I drop dead as I'm washing my head_x000D_
What if I never get a chance for atonement_x000D_
_x000D_
Then I sigh and cry_x000D_
And utter words I read from another thread_x000D_
You are not your thoughts_x000D_
Just let them pass_x000D_
Think of a positive thought_x000D_
Feel your body's space and mass_x000D_
_x000D_
Focus on the tip of your toes_x000D_
Up to the point of your knees_x000D_
Then up to the button on your belly_x000D_
And to the joints on your wrist_x000D_
_x000D_
Who am I if I am not my thoughts_x000D_
Who can I be without it_x000D_
Can I ever be free from my own intuition_x000D_
Can I be separate from the mind that lives in me_x000D_
_x000D_
I've been told that no one's life is perfect_x000D_
And we all have our own crosses to bear_x000D_
But I can't help but compare how mine's a bit unfair_x000D_
I'm exhausted with my load but to others it's just air_x000D_
_x000D_
And so I pace and tap_x000D_
I bite and sigh_x000D_
And feel my uneasy stomach inside_x000D_
But I breath and check_x000D_
My pulse is still on deck_x000D_
And instead, write down all the thoughts in my head