I think i have depression since i was 10 years old. I have no self-esteem at all, i'm obese and i feel ugly, boring, stupid... And the last months were so much worst.

I'm medicated, i try hobbies and i go to therapy. But most of the time i'm heart broken and scared, i'm afraid to end my life because i don't see the end. I'm terrified to be like this, this sad, for the rest of my life. I think i hate myself and i'm fighting this urge of cut off all the important people in my life and just scape.