I had a dream where I visited my girlfriend and a close friend of ours at one of their flats. Normally in dreams faces are swapped out or just distorted (not disfigured, but they don't look the way they do irl). The lighting was a cold bluish white. They both looked at me like I had murdered a child. 

Then, out of nowhere, another guy comes in and starts making out with my girlfriend. My significant other. The girl I want to marry. 

In the dream, I just remained stonefaced and left. Never said a word, never been addressed. 

And when I woke up and realized what had happened in the dream, I cried for an hour, the first time in so fucking long. Emotions are hard for me to process, and I had not felt so sad, so truly alone, since the last time we broke up because of my mental health. But feeling like everyone I know hates me? That's the worst part. 

I feel like I'm damaged goods. Like I'm unlovable. If what happened in the dream happened irl, I might just off myself. 

Sorry for the negativity and the long post.