I'm a new university student in my first semester. My senior year of high school was good, I was the guy at my school, I'm a university level athlete and was offered a scholarship to play football. I was offered about a year a half ago. But this year I've been diagnosed with C-PTSD (complex PTSD), this is all due to my childhood and me seeing some messed up things for the past 8 years of my childhood and teenage years. I grew up in a single parent household with 3 other brothers, I'm the middle child and had to be an adult growing up. My mother was addicted to multiple levels of drugs and wsa involved in dealing them. As a child I was forced to grow up, my older brother was only two years older than me but he is selfish and never cared for anyone but himself. I had to make dinner every night, make sure everyone was up in the morning, went to bed at night, all while my mother didn't help and only added to the list of things to do and screamed in our faces everyday if we didn't do what she wanted to her liking. Now I'm medicated for my anxiety, which manifests its own way, like seizures, manic episodes, visual and auditory hallucinations, and the occasional panic and anxiety attack. I feel anxiety 24/7, in highschool I was lucky enough to see a psychologist once a week for about 7 months until I left for university. The reason for my ptsd to come up this year was cause I moved out of my mothers into my now ex girlfriends place. They are amazing people, upper middle class and served me three square meals a day, got me clothes, a phone and a phone plan, shoes and everything they would do if I was one of their children. As grateful as I am for that, me being outside of my mothers home and seeing what normal is like, resulted in the ptsd episodes to manifest. I dated that girlfriend up until last month which could be a whole post on its own. But now, I feel as alone as ever but I also wanted to be alone, I had to take a medical leave from football because how bad it became. Every action I take seems to cause a breakdown of me, any sound makes me jump. Recently I've been thinking about unaliving myself, although i'm too scared to do it, I just want all the pain to stop. I've worked so hard to be in my position, yet i'm in the worst mental state in my life right now. I just don't know how to deal with it all,  I know you guys arn't medical professionals, but I feel as though I'm so alone in my situation. What type of things do you guys do on a day to day basis to avoid having extreme anxiety? I workout, play video games, picked up a couple hobbies cause I have so much free time, yet it seems to be all in vain some times.