I have BPD and the depression/anxiety/ptsd that can accompany it. I have one or two supportive friends who I can talk to and who care about me. They're not who I'm primarily around, though.

I'm primarily around my mother who I've had to live with for a year recently because of a break up. I'm trying to save the money I need to find my own place. I've only had 2 months of casual inconsistent work with promising full-time positions soon available and I'm finishing a diploma in an unrelated field. I'm going to a psychologist as I can't afford a psychiatrist. I'm trying to improve my social life. All-in-all I'm struggling up the ladder one rung at a time. I slip occasionally and have to work my way back to where I was. Normal.

But then there's my mom. She's just hindering any progress and I have no means to avoid it or even solve it. To explain: she's not like a mom. She doesn't care like a mom or want to know you like a mom. She doesn't help like a mom or support like a mom. Now I can deal with that totally if it weren't for her also not being a mom by criticising and giving backhand compliments. It's not rare, it's every time we interact. Through text she's fine - it's there for anyone to see in writing so she reins herself in.

Tonight's is a fun example. Referencing my weight: 'you're so skinny now. You're half the size of me. It's always been the other way around!' (It actually hasn't). I made the mistake of arguing. I usually just try to walk away but I've had a particularly bad week with my emotions so it just happened. 

It all amounted to being told that I'm mentally unstable (just figure that out?), the genetic link BPD is definitely not from her (she behaves in every characteristic) - all she had was a bad marriage 26 yrs ago, I don't know how to be an adult (I've lived away from home since I was 17 except for 2 recent years, I'm 25) and need to just grow up, all I need to do is suck it up and I'll be fine, I'm a teenager (because I finally lost my shit at that last part). 

I can't get away from this woman and she can't be talked to or reasoned with. I'm finding it hard to cope with the anxiety of trying to avoid someone in my own home only to inevitably see them and have to hear some snarky comment, get roped into her unstable personal relationships or passive aggressive comments about stuff we'd meant to have already dealt with. 

How have you guys dealt with absolutely anything similar to this? I'd love any ideas on how to cope because it's already hard without someone playing on my already elevated and out of whack emotions. 