I really, desperately thought that this was gonna be it. I had planned it all, quite well. I wanted to die more than I've ever wanted anything in my life, and I still kinda do... but I spoke to my best mate and she calmed me down which was good... kinda snapped me back in to reality if you will. But my fear is that I'll likely feel that bad again, and soon. I mean, I still sorta do feel that bad if you get what I mean. Like while I'm safe now, is this gonna last? what happens when I wake up in the morning still feeling that desperate, lonely and plain horrific? Just cuz I'm alive doesn't mean my circumstances have changed. I'm still fucking ill aren't I :/