30s F. Single and can't get someone to commit to save my life. Decent body but ugly face. No real skills. Can barely get a job in my field. Weird family who are extremely negative and only talk to them because they have money. No real friends... just a few people who talk to me when they're bored or theres a lull in the rest of their life. Have a top-tier man interested in me for a few years now, but he doesn't know my life. And even he only talks to me at odd hours of the night or when there's nothing else to do. I feel so shitty as a result. I'm not even that weird, I seem to charm people at first. But then they slowly start treating me like an afterthought.

I just want basic things in life. A career. To be good at something. But I have no motivation. I've given up on thinking I'll ever get married or have that life I dream of. I've decided to go off and fulfill my own selfish dreams as a result - start that business, become a star. These are the things I would want if I can't get what I really want, which is to be married to someone amazing and taken care of. SO yeah, I'm depressed that life hates me so much.