Hey all! I’m BP2 and wondering if anyone else feels like an imposter sometimes?

I feel like when I’m in my “normal/neutral” mood, I look at my previous hypo or depressive episodes or when I have psychotic or dissociative symptoms and wonder wtf was I thinking and I must have been acting or lying to myself and others because how could that actually be how I behave.

It’s actually become quite distressing lately because I feel like a burden to my partner and family and it makes me feel even worse when I snap out of it and think this is all just a bunch of bullshit that I’ve made up in my head for attention or out of boredom.

To be really clear, I know it isn’t because I can also look back at those times and recognize I wasn’t in my right mind, but I still get stuck in an imposter syndrome intrusive thoughts cycle…

Anyone feel me?