So, I've been dealing with mental health shit for a really long time. I have terrible anxiety, OCD, suspected Bipolar Disorder and/or BPD (they aren't sure which yet) and just a whole plethora of issues, honestly. So, at first, my doctor (GP) put me on Prozac- I went insane. I was trying to kill myself every 5 seconds, depersonalization/derealization, etc. Then, he put me on Lexapro, which worked KIND OF for a little while- the anxiety was NEVER fully gone, always underlying. Then, I got to a point where my mood swings, anger outbursts, and terrible rage got to a point I could no longer control including my anxiety. So, I started seeing a new psychiatrist who diagnosed me (tentatively) with Bipolar. So, she put me on Risperidone which made my OCD and anxiety a little more intense. So she put me on Lamictal, I was on that for a month, really didn't do much; still had the terrible outbursts, mood swings, and rage- even intensified. Now, she has me on Zoloft- I've been on it for about a week and I'm feeling like SHIT again! Complete anxiety, hopelessness, depression, suicidal thoughts, derealization, etc. What the fuck? I feel like no medicine they put me on is going to work, none have thus far. I was prescribed Klonopin for the time being and I feel like I am taking it way too often- everyday- I don't want to become dependent on it. I don't know what else to do, I don't want to keep trying meds and feeling WORSE evert single time. It's the fucking worst, I'm losing hope. Is it possible that SSRI's just DON'T work for me at all? My psych said, "I'm not sure your a serotonin kind of girl, but I'm looking at all the options"- Idk what she meant by that but I just feel like nothing is working and like I'm a lost cause. I feel like eventually people find something that works- and I'm just not. Is it possible I never will? I don't really want to go on in life if it doesn't get better. I'm just so low right now. I feel like my doctor is probably like getting really frusterated with me because I keep telling her I'm having these terrible reactions, but I really am. 