hey everyone 25m , i'm just posting this cause i know no one will feel you even your psychiatrist,gf or friends  dealing with ptsd , depression and i'm paranoied.
i've abused alcohol and drugs for a long time , now i'm just alcoholic dealing with all this i'm getting many phases in every week and every day , using all my energy to look normal in public but inside i'm dying .
my family doing their best , but it won't help .
everyone just keeps telling me to fill your time by enjoying the things that u like and they don't even know that eveyday i woke up i get angry cause i didn't pass away it's so bad when u had a better life before but now you just keep fighting for 10% of what u had or maybe less and btw fk all my friends cause none of them is real they are the enemies not like the strangers .
also i'm feeling like disconnected from reality it's like a game i'm seeing it .