I need support. I need someone to tell me that this is just a hump and I will get back to... something, something better than this at least. I don't feel sad, I don't feel empty. I feel numb. It's the worst possible feeling because I can see everything around me and I feel a glimmer of hope and desire to be a part of it, but it's like I'm behind glass. I've been drinking a lot more and I know it's not healthy but at least it's something. Bpd fucking sucks and i would give anything to have one normal day, one fucking day outside of my head. 