My dad will semi-aggressively but jokingly/sarcastically say things like "oh because you had it *so* hard growing up" / "gotta call child services" / "you always say we treated you so differently from others"   - all over really trivial, small things. 

backstory: my parents are aware of *some* of my trauma because of my hospitalization / diagnosis with BPD. In talking with my psychiatrist and learning more about the disorder and its causes, they've come to understand the role parents play in an individual developing BPD.

 I never directly blamed them, said this is their fault, or discussed the trauma I experienced growing up. Honestly, it's because I don't want to ever talk to them about how emotionally abusive they were, I don't need them to apologize or validate it, and because I feared repercussions like this and the intense denial that's going on. There may have been one time when I overdosed and was drugged out of my mind that I said something to my mom but I can't remember (based on ways they acted post-this). 

Emotional abuse is hard enough to come to terms with, moments like these make me second guess what really happened. Is this mild gaslighting? 

tl;dr my parents' guilt/ego is so powerful they could never believe they played a major role in my trauma/emotional abuse so they make jokes to appeal to their subconscious and further invalidate my experience.