To clarify, by 'cutting off social contact', I mean cutting off any meaningful relationship. So of course I'd still be interacting with people on a daily basis, but we'd remain as acquaintances and nothing more. 

Now I know that sadly, as an interdependent and social species, isolation is extremely unnatural. But I've done this before for a significant amount of time, and I think I can do it again. 

This is basically an unhealthy coping mechanism I am ready to employ. I'm totally aware of the damage that will result from this, but people have hurt me way too much, so I'm basically deciding to take pre-emptive measures to avoid this pain and abandonment. If I don't have any meaningful relationships in my life, I won't run the risk of being abandoned again and I'll therefore be preventing the whole cycle from continuing again and again and again ad infinitum.

Now I'm aware of the negative effects this could have, but I'm prepared to be alone. Besides, it's always been my natural state. This will also allow me to work more on myself. Who knows, I may even be able to develop self-worth in the process, and cultivate a healthy relationship with myself? 

I can no longer afford to get my dopamine releases through other people. I need to work on myself. So this means that I need to finally get my ADHD diagnosed and start actively working on it by implementing strategies to increase executive function, focus, etc. I need to watch my BPD traits, mainly by building self-sufficiency. Now I know that relationships are an integral, unavoidable part of life, blah blah blah. And I know that I'll never transcend my raw, human needs. But I can still *cope* without fulfilling them. To be honest, I've basically just given up. 

Call me a hypocrite but I don't recommend that anyone follow what I'm choosing to do. In fact, I'm sure many of you probably already isolate yourselves as a coping mechanism against abandonment.  I'm fully aware that this is not the correct way to evolve, learn and grow. But I have just had enough. 

So for however long this lasts, I'll be shutting down any potential friendship that pops up for my own mental health  (woops, I'm actually jeopardising my mental health... but you get what I mean) and that of the other person. Not that I can feel true empathy for other people anyway. Well, no that's wrong. I definitely *can*, but it depends on the person and the situation and how much I can relate to them. I can also empathise on a cognitive level, but not on an affective level. 

Anyway, people ought to be grateful that I'm doing this. I'm basically a toxic liability that should be avoided like the plague. &gt;&gt;&gt;&gt; I know this isn't true on a rational level, but on some level, it is true. But ugh tbh my acquaintances love my company aand I'm so upbeat and energetic and inquisitive and curious and the hyperactivity aspect of my ADHD comes with a lot of positives! But that's because they're acquaintances, and nothing more, hahahah. People soon get sick of my hyperactivity, my incessant talking, and my implicit demands. Not to mention my explosive reactivity, susceptibility to frustration, all-round retardedness, etc 