So I have had depression and other disorders my whole life because of various reasons. But I’ve gotten very well at controlling them and staying decently happy. But the thing that seems to bug me the most rn is that my dream is to play football in college and I have a chance to next year. But the more and more I get into football and just the fitness community I realize everybody is on some sort of steroid. All of my idles all my hero’s are juiced out the gills and even people i played with in high school. And it just really bums me out cause I don’t want to do it but everybody dose it and I feel like I can’t accomplish my dreams without giving up on myself. 

Idk if anyone else has any problems like this but just seeing if anyone has similar problems or Maybe some advice.