
- "your BPD is lying to you"
- "your distressing emotions are maladaptive"
- "you are reacting too emotionally to things"
- "you think of things in a distorted way"

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy always made me worse, because of this "evaluation" of the client being "wrong" in their behaviour or thinking. i always wished that i could afford Client-Centred Therapy (ie founded by Carl Rogers) or other such therapies that are based purely on empathy instead of "fixing" a person's "wrong thinking".

what i'm finding on youtube takes as fundamental that BPD means you are "wrong" in some of your thinking and behaviours. i'm not able to accept that [even if outsiders would say it]. much of what keeps me taking more responsibility than i should for other people's unkindness of me is because i'm trying to "be reasonable" etc.

i've felt that people with BPD can be more kind than average, more sensitive to other people's need to feel included or heard, less about the surface measures of success in the world. feeling things intensely might not be completely "wrong". maybe being extra sensitive makes it difficult for us to handle the world.

what i want are suggestions of videos, podcasts, books that are less about trying to get us to "fix" our "distorted, maladaptive responses and beliefs", and instead non-judgementally (ie, not talking "wrong" or "maladaptive") *describes* or *shares* our realities and stories; shows empathy about what it's like to be us, instead of just trying to "fix" us. people talking about their personal stories might be good for this.

note: despite being diagnosed with BPD, i wonder if i'm an impostor. i don't have impulse or identity difficulties, but i have strong, strong abandonment issues, and rejection and being ignored hurts very, very deeply. i've cut out almost all friends out of my life since the last two years. so people exploring their abandonment and pain of rejection would be extra-helpful to me. (i'm also a male in my late thirties, in case that is relevant).

thanks for any resources you can point me to