Hi, I'm new to this sub. I had what I believe was a mixed psychotic episode in 2019. Once I came out of it, I was super confused and ashamed. I had no idea what happened, and I just pretended like that part of my life never happened. I even erased every picture and post I made for that entire time period. This year, I've started to process and come to terms with everything. I want to prevent something like that from happening again, especially because I'm starting to have similar symptoms to what I had before the psychosis last time. I've been researching what it could've been, and I believe bipolar is a strong possibility because of my very heightened moods during the psychosis and because I've always had depressive (and what I assume to be hypomanic) episodes. I'm going to find a specialist next month to see if this is what it is. I can't right now because I'm moving across the states in two weeks and I need to have insurance in the new state first.

I have some questions about bipolar. Just for clarification's sake, I don't want and am not trying to self-diagnose in any way, I just want to learn :)

If I am right and it is bipolar, what are some good ways to manage until I can go see a doctor? My mental health has taken a huge dip lately, and I lost all of my friends, and I've been extremely agitated, depressed, wired, angry, and once in a while euphoric and impulsive. I'm worried I won't be able to manage long enough to complete the move, but seeing someone now would probably be pointless since I want to find someone who will take their time to make sure whatever the diagnosis is is correct.

If you are manic or hypomanic, do the heightened moods fluctuate? Do they calm down a bit sometimes and then go back up throughout an episode? For example if someone was manic and agitated, could it seem to calm down for a day only to be back the next night? I hope this makes sense lol