I’m only 22F so I haven’t had a ton of jobs. But most of them I feel like I’m performing significantly worse than my co-workers. 

My first job I was a cashier at a grocery store in grade 11 and 12. Even after working there for a long time I would cringe if a customer asked me for help and direct them to a more capable co-worker instead. On top of that, I don’t think most of my co-workers knew who I was. I had a few people ask me if I was new when I had been working there over a year at that point.

My next job was when I worked at a retail store last summer. There was one other guy (Jake) who started on the same day as me. After about a month I remember seeing him working cash. I was a bit confused because the supervisor told me it usually takes 3 months before they let people do cash. I asked the manager if they could teach me as well since Jake already learned it. But the manager told me he wanted me to get more comfortable on the sales floor first. I was pretty frustrated but whatever I brushed it off and tried my best to improve. 
 
A little while later my friend from university started working there (I referred her). This time, the supervisor basically taught her cash right away. At this point I had been working there 3 months so I asked the manager again to teach me. But he said the cashier is the last person the customer sees before leaving the store. He wants to make sure that I can answer customer questions and leave a good impression. I was pretty fucking furious about this especially since I had previous experiences for TWO FUCKING YEARS as a cashier yet this was my friend’s first job. 

Now I’m working at an after school club for children and teens. My job is to basically be a mentor to the teens. Get to know them, help them through any challenges and help them with homework if needed. The only thing I’m good at is helping with homework, but it’s summer right now and there’s no school to help with.

I feel so awkward at work, Therefore I spend a lot of my time trying to find busy work. Things like cooking snacks, cleaning, organizing, washing dishes or sometimes just sitting there on my phone if there’s nothing else to do. When I try to talk to the teens they give like one word answers and I give up. Yet they have such great relationships with the other staff. A lot of the teens will play basketball or video games with the other staff and I just don’t know how to get to that level with them. As well I feel very disconnected with my co-workers.

I feel like I’m constantly failing at every job I have mostly due to lack of social skills and the fact I’m not very approachable. This is extremely frustrating and I’m not sure what the answer is anymore. I just wish it came more easily to me and I wish I could be less awkward 😭😭