i'm struggling a lot right now with irrational jealousy. my favorite person (also my romantic partner) has been getting to know a lot more people recently, and has been interacting with them a lot. im super happy for them; because theyve always been closed off, im happy theyre meeting new people and finding happiness with them! however, of course my bpd has to act up. i feel like i'm gonna be replaced even though that isnt likely. everything in me is screaming at me to just tell them to stop talking to anyone who isnt me. i swore to myself i'd never become a toxic partner but i'm having such horrible thoughts about myself because of it. i just want them to talk to me all day and not with anyone else. 

im having a full on breakdown right now because we were calling each other and i left to get something to eat; while i was gone they joined a type of chat room with their other friends and couldn't call me again. this is the first time anything like that has ever happened, i feel like this is the first step in them not putting me first. i feel so upset.