A new song came out by one of the rappers I listen to, Katori Walker. It's called "Choose Love (Jermaine)". 

The first lines are: 

I'm not afraid of love I'm just afraid of repetition 

Looking for a soul mate when everybody soul is missing

Feeling like it's competition who the first to fuck who over

&amp;#x200B;

This is why the world is so fucked. We are so jaded. I am so jaded. I like this song a lot. But it kind of makes me sick at the same time. I've been afraid of love basically my whole life even though that's all I've ever wanted, is to love someone and have them love me back. I already have that someone but we've made mistakes in our past, both of us, mine bigger. And one of my mistakes is in the title of this song. He was one of my mistakes. Not J. Cole obviously, but someone with the same name. And it just bugs me that his name is there because I want to forget him. He was a good guy and I fucked him over while I was fucking over my partner. It just brings up weird memories, things I want to forget. I feel guilty because my partner and I are on a good track. I know my brain is obsessing over it because it's someone from my recent past, someone I cared about but it makes me uncomfortable. I don't want to think about him.