I feel like my whole up till now has been a waste. I've literally done nothing to help improve it or even make myself feel better. I always feel tired, unmotivated, or just plain old sad. I always feel urges to give up and wallow in my own tears. I don't know what to do anymore. I want to do stuff, I want to expand my horizons, I want to see the world but everytime I try it slips away from me. Then I end up blowing it off and go back to me hating myself even more. I really don't feel happy about anything anymore. I can't even remember when I genuinely smile and was happy for real... 

Is there anything that can help me out of this pit of depression...