
My FPex just pops up out of nowhere after almost a year of no contact. He started out apologizing and telling me how much better he is, and wants us to make amends. I let him say his piece, and called him out for all his past bullshit. He owned up to it, and it was actually pretty nice to feel validated.

But of course it couldn't just end like that. He ended up asking me to the movies, and when I asked him why he would want that, he said it wasn't a big deal. Oooo my lord. It set me right off. The last time we spoke, I called him once because a panic attack after months of us not speaking, and he fucking threatened me with a restraining order and blocked me. 

Like you want to take me to the movies after that shit? Are you serious? Fine, we forgive each other, but you want me to sit next to you for 3 hours just because lol why not? No.

He always plays this game. 'I've changed, let's be friends' and then manipulates me into trusting him again so he can turn around and dump me. And I reminded him of that. And he just calls me dramatic, says he should've known I can't handle being civil. Like fuck you! 

I told him to get lost, lose my number, and do not randomly pop up again. It's done, over. But I'm still so triggered, and I'm fighting so hard not to blow up his inbox with all the reasons I don't trust him, and why he's such a loser. And ahh!!! I forgot how much he messes with my head, and all these negative thoughts are so overwhelming. I was finally moving on and he just opened all of these old wounds. And idk. I just feel really angry, and sort of proud, and completely hopeless all at the same time.