For me, I think the reasons for having schizophrenia were a combination of genetics, childhood trauma and weed and sex abuse in adult age. My first psychosis came as a lightning from clear blue sky: I fell in love with a woman, so I went to ”her country” by airplane in the middle of the night. I thought that the two of us could escape the past and start all over again, with new identities somewhere else in the world. I had a wish to leave my family for good and to spend the rest of my days with her. A month later, I was hospitalized instead.