i believe it’s true, that being a genuine and kind person does not get you anywhere, it only gets you taken advantage of. 
but why? 
when i think about it, i fall into what i could only categorise as a form of ‘existential crisis’. my mind wants to believe humans are innately good, but i think i would be lying to myself. of course, there are plenty of others who will definitely feel the way i do, the problem is somehow i feel i only attract the predatory and exploitative people, not those who are like me. 
the possibility of being happy when all i have been shown in my life is that i’m disposable to people who i love seems slim. it feels like a curse being an honest and empathetic person, it feels like people like me are destined to suffer with the burden of loving those who only exploit us. 
at times, i wish i was sociopathic, so i didn’t care about others at all. it’s difficult to accept yourself in a world that doesn’t seem to have a place for you. all i want to do is change, to not be so sensitive. but, who am i without that? i wouldn’t be me anymore, i would be like the people that hurt me. 

i hope there is a place for me some day, where i can be loved unconditionally and respected for being this way. 

if you ever feel this way too, remember it takes guts to be gentle and kind.