So my mom is a lawyer and my dad is a teacher, they both have super good jobs and educations. So, when I was born, they thought i was going to be the most educated, successful person ever i guess. basically from the day i could understand school and collage, they have been shoving collage choices, stuff to make my application better, stuff to make my job resume better. All 13 years of my life, I was only allowed to do stuff that would benefit my future. They’d even connect my interests, stuff like theatre that actually distracts me from school and makes me feel better, into stuff that would tie into my career. 

I hate it. I feel so useless, like I have to fit into a certain box to just be good enough. EVERYTHING is about my stupid career. EVERYTHING. When i loved swimming, I would have to get lessons and join a swim team, because collages love athletes! I just want to be a kid dammit. I wanna be a fucking kid. i’m 13. please. i have extreme anxiety about grades and when i get something below a A or a B, I feel horribly depressed and annoyed.