Some people say that those with BPD can only “love” people from a totally self-serving standpoint in that they crave relationships for the excitement of attaching to someone and for the emotional security. Whether or not this is actually true, I can say that my experiences reflect this a lot. When I dream about fantasy relationships with people (whether it’s romantic, familial, or any other platonic kind of relationship), I see that my real craving is for this enormous, overpowering sense of safety and knowledge that the other person sees me as special, unique, or the “apple of their eye”. It makes me feel like I’m floating and drugged with happiness, and I can sit still in these kind of “safety fantasies” for many hours. My fantasies revolve specifically around those intense feelings of eternal emotional relief, but if I try to imagine actually living day to day life with this particular fantasy person, the whole appeal of being in a relationship goes away. I think that the chase for this intense feeling is the only reason why I have ever cared about anyone, and the moment someone stops being the perfect praiser that they seemed like for several years, I can detach from them almost immediately. On the other hand, what seems like normal love and relationships looks so mundane and insignificant in comparison to the euphoria of BPD love. Does anyone have any insight about this?