So tomorrow I'm going back to the UK to see my family (I live in France). It's been over 2 years since I last saw them. 

Of course already loads of anxiety re rules of Covid , tests , booking tests and getting proof of them, checking and double checking my paper and phone certificates. Add to that some serious money stress cause I don't know if I should have spent this much on the trip. 

So this evening, chatting with my boyfriend about train times, go to check and my first train is cancelled. No other convenient ones, we start panicking about how to find a solution. Bf also has some serious mental health issues so can't cope driving me to the second train station. Plus rising early is very hard for him. 

In the end, I've chosen to drive to the town with the station, leave my car by a friend's house and then walk to the station. Then I have a 6hr wait at the second station.

I feel bad about asking him if I could drive me at 8h45 cause I know it's unrealistic but eugh. I'm having a hard time dealing with the change at the last minute, not knowing what to do and now I can't sleep despite needing to leave the house early. 

Don't honestly know how I'm going to deal with it tomorrow and I've been crying for a bit now. My anxiety had gotten a lot better but here it is biting me in the arse once again...