I wish I could. I know I put myself here, my life has always been unstable and dysfunctional. I don't wanna seem like I'm making excuses but where else can I go? 

I can't live with my mom, It's too crowded. I can't just go back to my state after everything was already broken apart.

I would have to job hunt again and I'd be away from my boyfriend. What else would I do?

I wouldn't have him, he's all I have now. 

Everyone says do whats best for me, I don't know what that is. I'm not really sure. 

Maybe I should go back and save and get paid shit. 

I don't know. How do I grow up? I've had jobs for 2 years atleast, I'm gathering my mental health shit together, I finally can go for my license. 

I don't have my own car or place or a new job yet. So I guess I'm still not a grown up.