I've gotten really depressed after a month back home, where I've experienced a lot of abuse. I'm eating less and less, waking up at almost sunset, taking all my meds way off schedule, and feel like I'm wasting away. I leave next week to go back to school but I feel so short sighted right now that I'm gonna have to recover from being home again. Especially since I feel like I'm ruining relationships. I either isolate and don't talk to anyone or I get in arguments where I genuinely cannot tell how much I am wrong. I have no one to talk to and nothing to do all day every day. Going back home is never a vacation for me; it's always weeks of isolation, boredom and extreme distress before getting thrown back into having to study full time. I just want to abandon everybody right now and go live completely alone far away. I won't do that and I know I'm not in a healthy headspace but it gets really hard to see any future besides isolating in my bedroom and talking to no one.