I've been depressed since I was about 9. I've been bullied in every educational institution I've ever been to - 3 primary, 2 high schools, 3 unis - Primarily because I'm really quiet/social anxiety and I'm overweight due to health issues &amp; meds. 

Anyway, when I'm depressed, I find it incredibly difficult to interact with people, I get lazy and I just sink down and down with my emotions. It just gets too hard for me to pretend it's not happening, and I suppose I'm too lazy to fake a smile. I'm constantly tired and I think I've become accustomed to being in that state since I was young. 

However, I've been told by all and sundry that I'm faking it because I don't pretend to be happy. My family and even some doctors have said "Oh. Really, you're depressed? But, generally people smile and joke a lot when they're depressed." 

I honestly don't know anymore. I'm just too tired all the time to bother faking anything. I guess that's just laziness?