I’ve been struggling with depression for a while and I’ve had suicidal thoughts for a while. I’ve never attempted on my life and I’ve always tried my very best to push those thoughts out of my head. Lately however, it’s been considerably more difficulty I deal with these feelings and I’ve found my self hurting myself. Nothing major, baby scratches on the arm and some light burns but it’s still new and scary for me. It was relieving to do it though, and sometimes I wonder if I’m even scared to die. 
I’m not sure anymore. I’ve tried to be such a positive energy for the ones around me I love and I don’t want to take myself away from them, it’s just getting unbearable and the thought of this depression being apart of me for the rest of my life is suffocating me. I’m not sure what to do.