



I don't go to weddings usually because they make me sad since my father abandoned me at twelve years old and tooky siblings with him, but my boyfriend really wanted me to go. The last wedding he wanted me to go to I didn't ask off work for and he said he kept looking at things at that wedding and missing me so I asked off work three or to four months in advance to go to this one because he kept telling me how much he wanted me to be there. 

Me and my boyfriend of almost 5 years went to a wedding rehearsal dinner Friday. I can't walk very much at the moment so I went with a walker. He rolled me into the reception hall (he thought the rehearsal was going to be in there) and went to go do his groomsmen duties.

It turned out they were going to do the rehearsal outside like the wedding will be so everyone went out to it and my boyfriend went straight there from his groomsman duties, so I was just in the reception hall alone. His aunt and grandfather saw me sitting alone in there after everyone had left, so they offered to roll me out to the rehearsal, but I felt embarrassed that I was just forgotten by my boyfriend, and I don't know them very well, so I didn't feel comfortable with them going out of their way to help me get outside. They rolled me to a window so I could look outside at the rehearsal taking place. About halfway through the first practice run of the rehearsal my boyfriend realized everyone was outside except for me and he came back and asked if I wanted to stay or go out there, but I told him I felt too embarrassed and that I would just stay where I was.

Saturday when we arrived at 11:40am for the wedding setup he said he wanted me to wait for a few hours in the car until the wedding starts at 4pm after I asked him to put me in the reception hall so I could wait there. He said he didn't know if anyone was allowed in there and he didn't try to find out or ask. After a while he sent me a text asking if I'm doing okay. I texted him that it wasn't okay that he wanted me to just wait in the car for hours. He offered to move me to the reception hall where I originally asked him to put me. Then he took me to the reception hall, and I waited. When his parents and sister arrived for the wedding, they came to the reception hall and moved me outside to where the wedding was taking place.

When the father daughter dance was announced I started to cry but I stopped myself because I didn't want to ruin the moment for the bride. My boyfriend comforted me but once all the major events except for the sendoff were over and a lot of people had left, including his parents, people were just partying, and he said "Well, let's not dwell on it now" because I was still trying not to cry. He said he didn't realize it would be rude (he is autistic) and that is sounded better in his head. Despite me trying not to cry and no longer wanting to be there or at least wanting to leave the room he insisted we stay. He wouldn't let me sit outside alone when I told him I wanted to either because he said he didn't think me being alone was a good idea. He didn't decide to leave because he wanted to stay and dance, and he wanted to be there for his cousin's send off. He said that maybe if I just sat there a while, I would change my mind and enjoy the party. 

He decided we would leave when he thought I was having a migraine. His friend asked if we could meet up with him later so my boyfriend could play Magic the gathering with him because he and his wife would be staying at the same hotel as me and my boyfriend, and I was okay with that. On the car ride to the hotel, we were talking about everything I was upset about such as how inconsiderate he had been, especially since I don't like weddings but went to be there for him. He was apologizing and saying it wouldn't happen again.

When we got back to the hotel I was upset about my dad and about how Jones had treated me this weekend. Around 10:30pm I told my boyfriend that I was getting really tired and that I was very upset so unless his friend was ready to meet up within thirty minutes, I wouldn't be able to go. I also told him I wanted him to stay with me because I was upset. His friend messaged him at 11:40pm to meet up. My boyfriend asked if he could go, I told him I wanted him to stay with me because I was upset. Regardless he kept asking over and over for me to let him go and he told me he would help me get to sleep and then leave. I realized that meant more to him than being with me so I told him he could go. I pretended to fall asleep, and he left within a minute. 

When he left, I couldn't sleep so I just watched television, was emotional, and waited for him to return. At about 2am he came back into the room, and I told him I had just pretended to fall asleep because if he really wanted to go instead of being there for me, I was just going to go ahead and let him go. I wasn't going to beg him to stay. He tried explaining himself, but I told him I didn't want to hear it. He tried holding me, but I told him not to and I moved away from him. 

Sunday, we had a long talk about it, and I let him know that I still love him but I'm not going to be able to just move on from this because it has damaged the relationship. 

I don't see him the same way right now as I did before the night he went to go play magic with his friend. I feel like he broke my heart. When I think about during the wedding when I was hurt but would look at him when he was around and still feel so much love for him only for him to abandon me again that night I feel like I've been shattered into a million pieces. 

I know he usually isn't like this, because otherwise I wouldn't be dating him, and it was because he was so excited by everything going on, but that does not mean this behavior is okay in any way. This weekend was just about completely awful for me except for the cake Friday night being really good.