I really like him and I want to commit because right now I feel good about myself. Even though i feel so confident about starting a relationship right now, I dont have hope anymore that I will remain like this forever. I used to believe that. But at this point I already know that tomorrow I will feel ugly and worthless and Im not going to be able to commit. 

Because of my love and respect i dont want to waste his time, give false hope or traumatize him. So i cut him off. 

After I get over this loss I will meet someone new and develop feelings for them and this loop will repeat. 

Literally i just want this to end, is there a way out?