Alright, so I've lost a lot of friends because my emotional intensity, irrationality, paranoia and fear of abandonment have all either destroyed friendships or made them too awkward to continue. This mainly happens with female friends as I get a lot more emotional over them. I might be on the verge of losing another friend but I don't know what to do.

I was supposed to meet her on Tuesday, but she stood me up. She messaged me the next day saying she ended up staying at another friend's house and forgot about our plans. I got annoyed at her and asked whether she forgot or just didn't want to see me, she insists she forgot and apologised. I said it was ok and she didn't reply.

So I dunno where I stand now, I dunno how she feels. I don't want to message her because I sent the last message. I want her to get in touch with me because then I'll know she's actually bothered about me. If she doesn't then in my mind that means she doesn't care about me. Is this the right thing to do? Should I message her? If so saying what?

I really dunno what to do but I don't want to lose her, however I also don't want to cling on to her if she isn't bothered. Does anyone have any advice?