My 13 year old daughter was diagnosed BPD when she was 6 years old. Therapy was reduced and eventually paused on recommendation of her therapy team when she was about 11 because it was unhealthily just becoming the “me” hour for her to enjoy being in the spotlight. 

She’s a good kid. We enjoy her. Many many times I’ve been able to help her feel understood or navigate a situation, not because I’m some clairvoyant or super in tune mom, but because I refer mentally to “how would a pwBPD be thinking right now?” It’s been so helpful to us as a family. 

She has a friend now who just received a confirmed diagnosis of the same, and is beginning “some meds”
She told me this as if medical intervention was bad. I wanted to nip that judgement in the bud: we began talking about BPD, I gave her some examples of how her friend might be feeling, and why meds are good if needed. 

As I’m describing her friend, she’s saying “but I do that too..” over and over. (Well of course kiddo... I don’t say) 

Finally she says “do you think I might be BPD?”

She literally seems to have no memory of actually being told she was by her therapist. It’s like she completely blocked out the memory. 

I explained to her that not only has she been diagnosed- it’s been helpful and reminded her of some life lessons I’ve given her, and explained that I knew they’d be helpful because of her diagnosis. She remembers the lessons, but not being diagnosed &amp; is pretty judgmental about the phrase. Like it’s an insult instead of just a description

Anyone have a book that could help her understand, and maybe she be able to refer to over the years herself, that NEVER says all the things you hear as stereotypes “it’s untreatable” ect...? Where she might recognize herself in a hopeful way? 