Hello reddit so, I’m 15 and my best friend is very very suicidal. She constantly talks to me about it and I’m glad that she trusts me enough to talk about it but I feel like all she does is wallow in her self pity and depression. I had depression that lasted 3 years and it wound up putting me in the hospital after I had a suicide attempt. So I know how she feels.
I was raised in an environment where you don’t sugar coat the truth. My mom always told me cold hard facts. How ‘people need to learn that THEY are responsible for getting better over time’ so I’ve definitely picked up the trait of being brutally honest. She’s practically in love with this guy and it sucks because she’s very emotional and seems to get attached very easily. She’s always talking about how she’s ugly, and how nobody would ever want to date her. Sometimes I want to scream in her face and tell her that if she keeps thinking like that and doesn’t at least TRY to think otherwise that she’ll stay like that. I feel like if it doesn’t work right away for her she tends to give up. It’s draining sometimes to talk to her because it feels like all she talks about is depression or cutting or how she’s in love with this guy. I love her and I don’t want to hurt her feelings but I don’t know what else to tell her. I’ve already been kinda harsh and I feel bad but i told her that she needs to realize that no boyfriend is gonna fix all of her problems and that she needs to listen to me and tell an adult so she can get help. Her mother doesn’t listen to her so I told her that there are other resources like school counselor or our psychology teacher (she always students to talk with her about if they’re struggling with anything) or even online counseling. I told her that suicide is a bad idea because it’s running away from your problems rather than trying to fix them. Either way I could really use advice on how to help her as best as I can without lying