chasing after others after the one i liked abandoned me has only caused more pain for me… it has only caused more conflict in my relationships.. i know i really messed up and i feel so much guilt.. i have been trying to fill in this emptiness inside of me with relationships… i’m really tired… i’m alone all over again and it hurts… even though i left, we both agreed it IS for the best and to end our cycle of hurting each other and codependency. it hurts more knowing it will never be repaired… it is how it is i guess. i messed up so bad