I don't do anything. I'm barely making it through two community college courses. I used to be a decent student in high school but drugs, alcohol, and social isolation have rotted my brain. I can't communicate or interact with people normally. At my age I feel like there is no turning back. I've failed time and time again throughout my life and it's led me to being the worthless pathetic piece of shit that I am. I want so badly to kill myself but I'm terrified of death. Medication and therapy aren't helping. I need an out. Sleep is the only time I am able to escape the nightmare I have created for myself.