I made some friends in school, and the last time I heard from who I thought was my closest fried was July when they asked me to pet sit for them. In which I had to respectfully decline as I was working over the summer before going back to school. Well we talk through messenger, and I can see when they see my message, yet they haven't responded to me in the group chat at all, none of them have. So I fear I lost them as a friend, and it seems like this pattern is ever repeating. 

IDK what I'm doing wrong, or if I'm being entitled, or if I'm being tedious because I'm scared of losing them and scared I'm being entitled when I don't want to nor mean to be. In which it's just made me feel depressed, scared of interacting with anyone, and scared to grow close to anyone. 

My family is always pushing for me to meet new people, yet I just at this point would rather be left along given each time I do. They just abandon me and I don't know the reason nor how to fix it. So I just stay in my room, and sleep for long stints of time to pass the time. I hate this honestly, I hate being alone yet scared to do anything about it.