Hello,

&amp;#x200B;

As stated in the title, I do not have a diagnosis but I did contact my doctor today for a consulationtion, and unless i change my mind I feel like it's time to get help, whether I do have BPD or other problems.

&amp;#x200B;

I've been struggling lately, with a lot of rollercoaster emotions, mostly about my girlfriend. We got together about 5 months ago, but since we got together I've had this intense feeling of her leaving me. I've talked with her about it and she has always been supportive, and tried to help me but I just can't help feeling this way. We spent the entire weekend together 2 days ago and everything was amazing. It always is when we are together. When she got home at sunday night, she had other plans and we usually Snapchat, but she did not send a reply before she went to bed. It affected me a little, but I thought she was just busy. Yesterday, she did not talk alot to me either, and I was completely emotionally drained when she was not responding and started analyzing everything I had done the weekend, and I tried to apologize for my conclusion, but she said it was nothing.  I hate it when i start analyzing because it really affects my attention span, and it is impossible for me to get anything done. I just sit alone by myself and try to find out everything wrong about myself. Eventually I fell asleep, and today, when I woke up we had lost the "two red hearts" next to our snapchat and I was completely crushed and decided to delete my snapchat. I later reinstalled it because "What if she gets mad for me not responding" and such thoughts. I just feel so alone, so scared for er leaving me and I'm sure I've done something wrong. Am i supposed to feel this way? Because I have these rollercoasters every week and I just get so tired from not being able to talk or show it to anyone. 

&amp;#x200B;

I'm sorry if this post is not worthy of the sub. I just wanted a place to vent, and you guys have shared your stories where I can relate, and I had nowhere else to post it.