I woke up this morning with a horrible pit in my stomach, and I've noticed constant urges to deflect whenever anyone wishes me a happy birthday. I really don't know what to do about how I'm feeling because I know everyone who wants to celebrate it means well, I just have this terrible feeling that I shouldn't be celebrated, at least not now. I really don't want the spotlight on me. I've turned the conversation of my birthday over to the inauguration being today so many times because of how scary the concept of a day dedicated to me is. I wish I could even say that this is something exclusive to this year but I've felt this way for a long time. Other people's birthdays? Lemme at em, I'm gonna do my damndest to make it the best birthday possible for them. My birthday? I want to hide under my blanket and never resurface. Am I alone in this?