I went to my doctor for a physical and asked for a referral for behavior health. They'll have the intake person interview you to match you up with a therapist. I decided to be honest for once, or as honest as I think because most of the time things don't feel real. So I talked to her for maybe 15 min or so, and maybe I sold it too well because she thinks I'm too complex for the therapists there (not exactly her words, but my interpretation). Basically they only see people short term and she thinks I need more long term support. They are supposed to call me within 2 weeks to help me find someone else, and at least I have an actual referral now that they can fax to the provider? I dunno. I was totally feeling like she was just like, you're a fucking mess and you're never going to be fixed. I'm just glad she only gave me the number for emergency mental health services and didn't think I was a threat to myself or anything. So, yeah, not sure how I feel. I hope they call. No places I've contacted in the past few months have even tried to return my calls.