Okay so this is a really long post it’s just me explaining why I don’t like living with others. I’m explaining because I posted something in AITA and they only focused on the fact that I didn’t like living with others. In post I mentioned not liking people in my personal living space.People seemed to think I meant places other than my literal home?So I think I’ll try to explain exactly why my anxiety is like this.As my post said I’m 19 female.I grew up living either with my grandmother or my mother.I cant give specific ages because its all mixed.When every I lived with my mom she always tried to make sure I had my own room unless we lived with someone ( which is what happened the most in my life).Whenever I was with my grandmother I had to share a room with my cousins, along with everything else that belonged to me.Only myself and 4 of my cousins lived with her.The 4 of them were siblings and I’m an only child.Before anyone assumes, because I lived with them so much I never experienced the stereotype of being an only child.Living with them was my own personal hell, even now we basically avoid eachother.My parents weren’t with me so they sent gifts in their place.Anything I asked for was mine as long as it was within reason, I had good grades, and behaved. That caused issues with them.The oldest didnt care(him and my mom were close) but the younger three were my bullies away from school.Any toy I got was broken some how, clothes got ruined, money got stolen.My main problem was with the girl.We are I think two years apart but she was always in the same grade as me so there was no escape.Any chance she got she beat me up.She fought a lot, so any girl that couldn’t beat her up, bullied me.The boys always had her back so I had no one.They stole from everyone even our grandmother.If something happened my grandmother would ask me but I kept quiet because I dint want to get beat up for snitching.That didn’t matter because she believed in “one for all, all for one” she we all got a whooping anyway and I STILL got beat up.None of our family members did anything not even my mother.My mom finally moved home but we were only two houses away from my grandmother and she moved the girl in with us.I went back and worth between the two until I was 12 and my parents got remarried and moved us to CA. When we moved there we lived with just us for like a few months and then moved in with my dads coworker.I slept in my parents room on an airmattress until we moved into our own again,Stuff went wrong and my mom and I left.I was once again living with my grandmother but now I was sharing a room with a toddler.Did that for two years, we moved down the road.We have a three bedroom so mom let other people stay in the house while she traveled.First my aunt and her two kids plus the girl cousin from earlier(Im 14).We no longer fought physically,but her and my aunt didn’t want to include me in anything they did.If they were in the Livingroom watching a movie and I joined, my cousin would either leave, start breathing hard, or start smacking her lips and rolling her eyes.My aunt wouldn’t take me anywhere or buy/cook food I ate.A few months later my aunt starts renting a house, moves all their stuff in it, but never says a word to my mom.They never came back to the house and I was by myself for three days.She finally tells my mom and I have to move back in with my grandmother.Few months later the cousin has to move in with us as my aunt kicked her out.My mother comes home. Myself and the cousin move in with with her.Eventually my mother kicks her out my sophomore year for getting kicked out of school.A different cousin moves in,mom is working nights at a hospital.She constantly has boys over, doesn’t clean, or anything else.She moves out. Mom goes back on the road and lets her coworker/friend and her daughter move in.We are now in our junior year.They move out after middle of senior year(November 2020).Since then I have basically been living alone. My mom is on the road.I have our house to myslef 24/7.I understand the military is different.I explained that I went to JCLC. It is literally baby basic.It’s jrotc students being treated like we are in basic by our instructors that are ex-military.We sleep in barracks, we eat in the mess hall,we run training gcourses, etc. I’m fine being around people. I just don’t like people in my home.