So, I’m really going through it. I went to the dentist today after 5 years. I need 3 root canals and a whole host of fillings :/ I struggle so much to care for my teeth, and the dentist is incredibly triggering due to some SA in my past. I cried the entire time and all they did was take X-rays :/

How am I going to go back? How am I going to get alllllll of this shit taken care of when I have an intense panic attack just driving there? They offered to find an anesthetist for some of the work, but I can’t be out for the root canals. I guess I’m just looking for support, I can already feel it triggering a deep depressive episode, when I’ve been only manic/hypomanic off and on for years now. I just feel like it’d be so much easier to just sleep and never wake up again. I just want this to be easier and it’s so, so hard