Why am I always the fucking bad guy. I spent my whole day at my job catering to other people and I'm not feeling well either. I have cramps and my stomach hurts and all I want to do is lie down. But I'm at my job all day long and finally come home only to have my spouse talk to me non stop about his hobby and what he's doing and how it's not going the way he wants. I am at my limit. I have taken enough of everyone else's shit for the day and all I want is for someone to sit next to quitely before I have to make dinner for the whole family. I guess i said something that didn't sit well because now we're arguing and I'm angry and it's late and everyone is waiting for me to make dinner. I pour myself a glass of whisky and make dinner and tell everyone that I'm gonna show and to enjoy the food. My spouse asks me if I'm gonna continue to talk this way and I say no. I'm super frustrated and I'm gonna do my own thing and he can do his. He says I'm not the only one who is upset and that I think I get a pads to act however I want because I have "bpd". Now I am sobbing in my room. Alone again. What an insensitive prick. How am I the bad guy in this situation. How do I always end up being the one who's wrong. I'm just trying to navigate through my life without having a fucking breakdown every 5 seconds. But I'm wrong. I'm always wrong. And I just want to run away. I just want to not be apart of this family anymore. I just want to disappear and be by myself because honestly that's what if feels like anyways. How am I possibly wrong. I'm so hurt. I'm so angry. I'm so alone.