posted here a few days ago abt being in the midst of a horrible episode n thinking about taking some time off bc of it. i did, thursday i called my manager and explained that i was having a mental health crisis (i’ve disclosed that i struggle w mental health but never specified) and my doctors recommended i take off until the following tuesday to regroup. she was understandably clearly frustrated but was nice, and just said this messes with the animals level of care (i’m a vet tech) and that made me feel like shit. she asked for documentation from my doctor and said we’d meet tuesday to talk. i’m not getting fired but it feels like i might be on thin ice, idk. i texted the other techs tuesday after i left to ask if i had done something wrong bc they seemed upset w me and neither of them replied. my manager said they’d come to her earlier in the day on tuesday and expressed concern for me. i’m not particularly close with anybody there, we get along great on a work friend level but that’s it + i’ve only been there for about 3 months. i’m so fucking embarrassed to go back. i’ve done this before at other jobs (fast food, retail etc) and i would just ghost completely immediately after but this time i cant. i want to so bad but this is my career and it’s the best thing in my life. i feel like everybody is going to be judging me, mad at me, whatever and i hate it. i hate that they’ve had so many days to talk shit about me while i haven’t been there. i feel like when people think about mental health they think depression/anxiety, not hallucinating, dissociating staring at the wall for hours, cutting, going from screaming &amp; crying to completely numb multiple times in one day. not that anything is less valid than another, i just mean some things you can’t work through and they have no idea what it’s like. people have called me a drama queen since forever. i’m petrified of tuesday coming around. i want to cry i really don’t want to go back