i feel immensely misunderstood n frustrated therefore im gonna share with u guys how my bpd feels. granted it’s different for everyone but i hope this helps someone feel less alone. we gon make it


i feel as if i’m inside a glass box watching while my life goes on in front of me. not knowing, or all knowing at times. to feel as if you’re entire world is crumbling down right in front of your eyes because it’s that certain day of the year again or u can’t find that one thing, to look in the mirror and not recognize who’s looking back at you. to feel constantly invalidated by a society that seemingly doesn’t understand. we can be seen as ‘drama queens’ or plainly ‘overly emotional’ but every bit of pain, sadness, emptiness, happiness we feel to various extents, i compare it to noise on a television, the volume is adjustable yet the difference is we don’t have the control over how loud it can get, at times deafening n defeating. internally set aflame, we burn. the outside world only sees what goes on externally, we smile, make occasional eye contact, talk about what our eyes see. i question everything, who i am, am i good or bad person? (as if it’s that simple n we aren’t all complex creatures) it’s like a professional football game going on internally. sides are clashing, theres only one winner. it’s being profoundly self aware yet immensely struggling to overcome how u feel, how MUCH you feel it, how you’re thinking, why you’re thinking the way you are, how much i care about how the people i love see me in their eyes. you would think being self aware would help, as of it you’re able to identify your self destructive patterns of thinking you can find control over how you feel. well with the deck of cards i’ve been dealt we feel so much to the extent it can overpower the logical aspects of who we are. we come with a powerful intuition, the ability to read a room/vibe as soon as we walk into it, we may think 50 years into the future but i’ll be damned if we ever pop out unprepared. never a dull conversation, probably more self aware than people with their sanity. we crave understanding. i love all of you 

&lt;33