To put it bluntly, we feed off of each other's BPD. We are each other's identity. We switch roles between the victim and the aggressor. It seems sometimes that we compete with each other as to who can be the most reckless. We tell each other stories of our rage fits, the lies we've told people we will reveal to each other. It has always been like this, since I was a child. I live in New York now and she lives in South Florida, I rarely visit, but the cycle continues.

For example, both she and I have alcohol problems. We tell each other drunk stories and then chastise the other for our problem. I am in a poor relationship with a married man, she is dating a man my age, we take turns berating each other until one of us breaks down. I know this relationship is unhealthy, but I feel like she is the only person who truly knows me, you know, behind the mask.

I want to have a healthy relationship with her but I know this will never be possible. Neither of us are in therapy because of the price. Frankly, I have no interest in therapy. Does anyone else deal with this type of relationship?