Intrusive images/scenarios

Hey guys,

Hope you all are doing well today. 

So as you may or may not know my obsession is over schizophrenia. I have gotten myself into such a panic about it and read up every single symptom of psychosis that I’m now fixated on looking it up and having thoughts about it. 

All the thoughts are from what I’ve been reading and I’m in a cycle that I do not know how to break just now.

For example they are all what if thoughts. How can they cause so much distress and anxiety??

What if the government are watching me/after me

What if I can read people’s thoughts/ they can read mine?

What if my food is poisoned.

What if my family/girlfriend hate me and they just joke about liking me?

Recently the whole what if about the government stemmed from the majority of schizophrenia stories I read about this one seems quite common, is it possible for anxiety/OCD to make up scenarios about this and then me ruminating over it trying to convince myself it won’t happen?

I also had an intrusive image of myself like I was sitting on my phone and the image came into my head like it was like someone watching me whilst I was on my phone. Gave me anxiety like you wouldn’t believe but now I’m going through my head and picturing someone watching me whilst I do everything. For example when I’m driving I’m imaging visualising my car and someone watching it from behind. So like what I’m doing is imaging as if someone would watch me and what it would be like. 

I honestly wish I didn’t have these thoughts but I’ve been online googling symptoms and stories and on you tube and I’m stuck. I hate the thoughts/images but I’m convincing myself that I have schizophrenia and psychosis. I cannot get this out of my head and it’s starting to make me emotional. 

Can OCD honestly be this cruel? 

Thanks