So been working my ass off over 10y. I had very big gambling problem paid all my debts. It took over 4y to pay my gambling depts. Now im debt free not working anymore cause of anxiousness and depression. Not sure if it from lot of work or just shit events in my life. I try to study now my last year in school. I dropped my school before so i dont have many courses left. After school i dont have no idea what to do. Right now i cant even be social with anybody without getting panic attacks. I dont even feel the need to see anybody. I dont have no any purppuse in my life now. Thats is the reason i just dont wanna live in this life. Everything i do now i dont feel nothing. It sounds wierd but i feel like the world has nothing to offer me even im just 30 years old i feel like i have seen enough of this life and its wierd cause i dont have lot experiences achieved yet. I had relationships good ones but i always ended those i just feel that i dont have energy to even make a family. I enjoy very much to just be alone. I have frends also but im just very anxious to see them also or my family members. Sorry my bad english just tried to say it in few words my situation. I just dont know whatta hell im suppoused to do right now in my life. I wish that there was some pill i could just eat and die peacefully. I just hope that someone or somebody somewhere knows my purpouse and show it to me i feel so lost and empty.