I just wanted to vent about how it's exhausting to have a favorite person, specially if you have romantic feelings for them. 

I got close to this person who I had a small crush on for a few months, and who I've talked to sporadically. We just clicked and spent almost a week talking all day every day. They understand me, they know about me having BPD and are incredibly supportive and understanding. They are caring and loving and we share a lot of things. 

However, they haven't been doing too well, they are tired from a lot of work. That means that our conversations are shorter and they're not as engaged as they used to be. After loads of therapy I can manage it and not behave impulsively, or get too upset, or demand more attention, but it's still so taxing having to deal with all the feelings. I can't help but feel like I'm bothering them even though I'm not doing anything bad. I'm afraid to do anything that might hurt this relationship. 

I don't want to talk too much to my friends about it because I've been on and on about this person. I just wish I could turn my emotions down a bit and just chill lol