Idk if this is a normal or outlandish thought bc I’m manic. And I really hope I’m not offending anyone bc I know when I’m in a depressive episode I hate when ppl try to say shit like this so I’m sorry. 

But do you ever think being bipolar is almost a good thing? I know a lot of ppl hate Kanye but nonetheless I always think about how he calls bipolar disorder his “superpower”. How in his song I Thought About Killing You he says the most beautiful thoughts are always beside the darkest (ik he didn’t make this up but whatever that’s where I heard it first). No matter how corny that line is, I still think it’s important to remember. In my most depressive, suicidal, fuck the world episodes, I always find myself reflecting on my whole life from start to finish and dwelling on human existence. Even though when I’m in this mindset my perspective is entirely pessimistic, I still think it’s a profound experience to have. When I feel this way, I think about how precious life is and how we fucking waste it. And yes, having an existential crisis every week isn’t chill but at the end of the day, isn’t kinda cool that we can take this rock bottom feeling of desperation and then turn into a euphoric feeling of gratefulness ? I can experience these two different mindsets multiple times a day, as I’m sure u guys can too (if unmedicated). I can cry of pure misery and then cry of pure joy within the same hour. To go from “I’m never gonna feel happy again” to “God I love myself and this life, I’m so grateful I made it through” in such a short period of time is so awful but also beautiful. 

So yea idk I think being bipolar makes me a better person. I have the ability of seeing all these different outlooks of life and that’s just not something “normal ppl” can experience. Anyone feel the same? 

Again I’m sorry if I sound like a batshit weirdo but this is a safe space right