I was in a relationship with my fp but a couple days ago I made the decision to leave. I love them still so much but they always find a way to hurt me even if they didn’t mean to. I’m so exhausted. I tried so hard to make it work, I gave them everything I had and it still wasn’t enough. Its only when I threaten to leave is when they begin to try. It’ll be good again and then they just start doing the same things. Lying, going behind my back, hiding things from me. Everyone told me they were just using me, but I ignored them because of the way they can make me feel. I broke up with them over text which is shitty but every time I tried to break it off in person, they get me to come back. They convince me they’ll change, and that they’ll stop talking to whoever it is that time, but I swore to myself if it happened again I wouldn’t come back. Then it happened again so now I’m here. They say they were only talking to end it. For closure. So we could finally start our lives together. But for weeks? Bullshit. I thought we already had started our life together. I just can’t believe anything they say anymore so how would it work even if I did go back? There’s just no trust. Now I’m starting all over and I’m scared. My whole life surrounded around them for years. Now I’m alone. I’m trying not to panic, I’m hoping this will be good for me. I have a habit for codependency. Im trying to break it, be my own person. I’m hoping I can do this…