My marriage isn't doing great. Dog was healthy and happy but died unexpectedly over a month ago to something unpreventable.

I have always been sad but he was my partner in crime, my reason why I got up when I didn't want to. 

My life really isn't bad. I'm not poor or unattractive. But I'm just broken inside and just not happy. Every night I fall asleep hoping I don't wake up. I just don't know how to go on like this and at the same time don't seem to have the will power or desire to seek help.

No one knows or understands where I am because I just put on a good face. I don't know why. I just don't want to talk about it so I don't. Or maybe they just don't notice.

I don't know how or why to pull myself out of this hole. I go through life like normal but I just don't care about anything that much, or at least not enough. Clearly I care a little since I'm still here but when I ask myself why or what I don't have an answer.

Just a rant I guess.