my ex left me in 2020, she cheated on me and got pregnant, she left me after she found out she was pregnant and started dating the kids dad shortly after, i struggled with it really badly and it’s still hard for me to talk about in full detail, fast forward to now, i really struggle with the idea of a new relationship but i also struggle with the idea of being alone for the rest of my life, i’m scared that something like that will happen to me again, just the idea of letting a new women in my life again makes me uneasy, but i’m also scared that my fear of getting cheated on again is going to keep me from being in another relationship in the future or having a healthy relationship, i’ve tried to work on it but i’m constantly suspicious of people and what they may be doing behind my back, i think part of the reason why i struggle with the idea of a new relationship is because in some ways i blame myself for my ex cheating on me.