Hi, I'm a guy with mild BPD and I was wondering what the main drive is for other BPD to (ab)use substances and what kind. I hope it's "legal" to talk about that here.

I've been experimenting with drugs since I was about 16, 'mainly' because I'm very interested in their effects on a persons mind. But there are also times that I binge on a certain substance for a while because ie I'm bored or I convince myself they make me feel better when I'm down (or even keep me from suicidal thoughts/actions). It used to be weed on a semidaily basis and until a few weeks ago ketamine until my tolerance became too high.. 

After a while I always lose interest in my temporary addicitons like drugs, alcohol, smoking and gambling (and sadly relationships too in a way..) so that's why I never worry too much about it.

It got me wondering what the specific drive is for others here, if there is any to use certain kinds of drugs :)

PS: Please try to keep the negativity down :D