I'm tired of fighting. I can barely even get out of my bed most days lately. 

All I can think about is killing myself and I keep getting closer and closer. Asking for help hasn't gotten me anywhere and I can't get myself to go to the hospital alone. 

I am supposed to graduate college in less than 4 weeks, but I have no plans for after because I can't help thinking I won't even make it until then. 

I feel pretty darn pathetic right now and really hate my guts.