I don't think I'll be here much longer. I'm so exhausted. 
Basically I quit them because they're too expensive and me and my family are struggling very bad financially. I really don't know what to do at this point. My suicidal thoughts are there 24/7 and I can't figure out how to shut them off. I don't know what to do I cant do this alone I don't think I'm gonna make it. I can't get out of bed and I can't get anything done and I'm failing at everything. I feel like a burden to everyone around me and I wish I could just stop existing because everyone will be better off without me. I need to change this I don't know what to do I'm sorry if this post doesn't make any sense I'm just so exhausted