Health anxiety is the absolute worst and I’m struggling with it so much at the moment. 

I’m one of those that avoids doctors and hospitals and stuff at all costs because terrified but I wish I could be someone that sees them often; I haven’t spoken to a doctor in probably about 4 years now. At this point I don’t know what is anxiety and what’s actually wrong with me. 

I haven’t felt ‘well’ in a while but today especially I just don’t feel *right* and of course my mind immediately thinks I’m dying. 

I mean I’m only 20 but my lifestyle has barely been ideal the past few years. I barely ever go outside, I don’t exercise, I’m underweight and can’t seem to gain it and I’ve been suffering with insomnia for almost 2 months and then throw the crippling anxiety and depression on top. I feel like absolute hell.