On paper everything is going great for me. I’m graduating tomorrow after slaving away for 4 years to earn two degrees. I’m going to be getting my master’s in 1 year on scholarship and being sponsored by my professor. My mother just got cleared from the hospital and my dad just got a raise and we finally paid off our outstanding debts. I made new friends this year that I can actually call upon and hang out with and trust. But none of that matters in my own stupid head because of my conflicted feelings with my fwb that makes me feel like I’m in a six foot whole. It’s not like I don’t understand the terms of our relationship, hell I agreed with it and we both have mutually benefited from it. But I also know that it’s probably not going to go anywhere past that and for whatever dumb reason that’s been a crippling thought to think about. When I think about where I was a year ago I should be elated rn and these feelings should be over and yet it’s like their hitting harder than ever all because I don’t feel loved enough by people who remind me that I’m loved every single day. I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to post this I just feel so pathetic.