Hi. I am going to keep this a shorter post and I am in need of guidance, so any help or advice is massively appreciated.

 For some context, I had a rough breakup with an unhealthy friendship back in December 2020. Up from there to August 2021, was the roughest period of my life. My doubts, insecurities, and fears overwhelmed me, and in the end, I lost against them, allowing them to control every single aspect of my life.

Now, as school restarts, I've been trying my best to try and free myself from them. With heavy research on sources and Reddit, I've come to know that these thoughts are just that, thoughts and that they have no impact on my life at that given moment. I'm accepting this, but one thing, ONE thing is holding me back. Guidance.

It's been over a year since I started listening to these thoughts, to the point they dictated my entire life, and now, I have all the power to free myself from them. Months of new experiences at school allowed me to realize these doubts aren't true. I have improved and I am proud of that. I no longer fear what others think of my every movement and appearance, but I still fear that I have to act a certain way. Above all, the elephant in the room is that my thoughts dictate my head, and make me believe something bad is coming. I know that this isn't true, because I've been through it so many times, but I can't seem to stop myself from listening to these thoughts and letting them pass because I'm scared of getting lost without these thoughts to guide me. I've listened to them for so long, and suddenly not listening to these horrible, negative, false doubts, seems so terrifying.

What can I do about this? I know it's nearly impossible to just erase these thoughts and go back to my old life where I never had to fear like this, but I want to know that I am more than these thoughts and that they don't dictate me. Once again, if this gets any replies, thank you deeply.