I am so heavily depressed since forever that I can't function at all anymore. Grave burnouts are becoming recurring since a few years. I never formed a desire to live and now I can't even pretend; I can't work, can't read, can't develop skills, can't watch movies, can't talk to friends and family, can't go to class, can't believe in anything. I google means to end it every single day. 

I want to go. And I think it's only rational.