I have split parents and spent a good portion of my childhood without my dad in the picture. He is without a doubt a mega narcissist so that alone speaks for itself in reference to the title. I didn’t know him until I was 7 and from that point on the manipulation was extremely apparent. 
My whole life leading up to his entrance and most of the time after, I heavily relied on my mom. She was a great mother and we had a pretty unhealthy attachment with each other because I was her only child and her my only parent. (We went through a lot of hardships together) I never thought that she could be part of me problems until last night. I was pondering over my religious views and remembering all the ways she influenced me using her religion as I was growing up. She’s like intensely Christian to the point where her faith has shaped and defined nearly every single aspect of her life. 
My current partner has been pointing out some of the shady things she says and does in order to preach her truth to us. 
It’s been so hard to see and for the longest time I would get so defensive when he said anything even remotely negative about my mother. She’s been my rock for so long so how could I possibly accept that she’s manipulating me in any way? 

But the honest truth is that she is. She’s an incredibly smart woman and knows how to communicate well. She’s very good at running any conversation and almost tricking people into seeing what she wants them to see. She carefully selects her words and will present things as if it’s in your best interest. I highly doubt she does it all on purpose, or if she does, I guarantee she’s doing it because it’s the lords will and she is somehow trying to “save you” from sin. 
It’s kind of ridiculous because now that I have moved out of her home I’m starting to open up to the idea that maybe she isn’t as perfect as I always believed her to be. And if I start to voice that opinion to her she will tell me I’ve only been fed lies by my worldly boyfriend who also desperately needs Jesus. She’ll turn it into some sob story of how she won’t be able to see us in heaven and how she feels sorry for our lost souls. But of course she’ll make it sound a lot nicer than that. 
I really think that my partner is the only person in my life who hasn’t tried to manipulate me. I truly don’t know where to go from here bc I feel like I am become the manipulative one fatter so much time learning from my parents. On top of having no sense of identity this realization seems to be setting in really heavily on my hopes to heal. I feel slighted and like I can’t trust anyone I love