Everybody has their "thing". Stuff that makes them happy or at least gives escapism from daily chores. Makes them special in their own unique little way. 

I wish I had that. I wish I wasa person, who wears hippy clothes, burns incenses, listens to mellow music, even smokes weed, hangs out with similar people and is attuned to themselves. I wish I was a goth with great make up skills, gorgeous clothes and high heels, interest in magick and the night. I wish I could be extroverted, make vlogs and meet people, see galleries, do sports, take care of themselves. Be chubby and bubbly and bright and take body positive photos. Be dark and gloomy and special, read and write surrounded by candles. But none of those things make me feel live, fulfilled, excited, joy, fun...

And so on. I wish I had one interesting bit in me. I don't even have hobbies anymore. I rarely meet anyone. I just lay on the sofa, watching short videos from Facebook, numbing myself, trying not to hate myself for not doing anything I watch. My personality is flat, boring and has no meaning.