So I’ve been dating my (23yo) SO (25yo) for just over two years now. About a year ago I started to slip after doing really well for a long time after I did DBT. I didn’t think it would get this bad but I did..I’m right back to where I was pre DBT and my partner never saw that, he met me at my peak health. Well I’m now destroying this relationship like I did my last one except the difference is my last one, was more justified as she was toxic too and did some shitty things. My current SO is perfect and I can’t believe I’ve done this. We’ve been fighting like crazy and he admitted he’s not as happy as he used to be because he’s always scared of upsetting me or doesnt know what will or won’t set me off on any given day so he’s stopped doing things he likes and stuff and he broke down because he has no idea how to help me. He said he hasn’t fallen out of love with me and he does want a future with me but he’s struggling hard bc he doesn’t know if he is good in a relationship at all (his last two long relationships have been with women who IMO had bpd as well). He said he’s give me time to get back into my DBT stuff bc I know it’ll help a lot. Last night things FINALLY seemed back to somewhat normal after weeks of cold distance and fights and crying every night.  

But now this morning my bpd loves to look for things to be upset about, lol. When him and I got together we were both going through rough breakups and were supportive friends to each other at first. I remember him talking to me about his issues with his ex and him saying he was giving her another chance but even though during that time we were talking as friends only it seemed like more to me (could be the bpd) but in the end he broke up with her and we ended up together.

There’s this girl at his work that I saw on fb and mentioned how pretty she is, he didn’t have her as a friend but we had some mutual friends that he also works with. Anyways they’ve been actually working together now and they’re friends on fb and stuff and she’s been invited to our next night out with friends and apparently she’s into the same stuff as us and whatever and she’s just his type. I can’t stop thinking that I’m his ex in this situation and she’s me, that this will end up the same and that they’re talking like we were and yeah 

Fml