If they talk to me for 10 minutes but spend the day doing something else, then I am only worth a tiny fraction of what that thing or person is worth. If they spend hours with me and only me, then I am wasting their time with my self pity, they feel obligated to spend time with me and they’d be better off if I wasn’t here.

Time just seems to be how I quantify things. There’s no way for me to win and I’m exhausted but I can’t make it stop.