First and foremost I would like this to come from a Borderline man or Women not someone who was hurt by someone that suffers from bpd and is biased. 

Ok so here is my question. Can borderlines feel empathy. EMPATHY not sympathy. Just a quick example of the two real quick sympathy would be like someone's child dies and you see they are sad and you say "I'm sorry for your loss" EMPATHY would be knowing someone lost their child and putting yourself in their shoes and actually feeling the pain and loss yourself. Big difference. 

Anyways the reason I ask is im really struggling... I was with my ex Bpd for 3 years on and off and it was what I thought was an amazing relationship I thought I had found "my soulmate" vice versa. Long story short things moved very quickly and shortly after marrying me and getting me pregnant my bpd ex husband became very violent. All (surrounded by fear of abandonment related issues) long story short his rages and violence were the demise of our relationship. I ended up moving out though still legally married and was put on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy, while on bedrest he was out trying to hook up with women online and had NO regard for his pregnant wife who was on bed rest, I ended up losing the baby shortly after and divorced him legally after that. My question is how can this man who was completely against marriage, children ect then wants them so badly with me do these things to me then show little to no remorse or sadness after I lose the baby. He literally was more concerned with "proof" that I did lose baby not sadness or any empathy for me. So what do you guys think? I'm incredibly beyond myself that someone could just not care and have no empathy towards someone they once loved and called their "soulmate" he even tattooed my name across his chest, which is something else he was extremely against. This guy is such a mindfuck please someone help me understand.