I’m just using this post to vent about things, so sorry if I wasted anybody time.Throughout my whole life, I always felt this sadness and void inside me everyday,so I always thought it wasn’t that big of a deal. I wasn’t sad all the time, like even if I’m doing something I enjoy I’m would be happy, but it never felt genuine, always fake. However, once covid happened, I found myself getting worse and worse. I would just start crying out of nowhere, and I would start to get thoughts like “Maybe if I would stop living I would just feel nothing” or thoughts of worthlessness. However, I’ve never implied suicide or thought about it, dying scares Like I ask myself what I want to do, and I can’t think of shit and it enrages me. Like I look at ppl around me and they get shit done, so what do they have that I don’t. All I ask for is to feel like a normal 20 year, to just go out and make friends and have a genuine good time. I appreciate everybody who reads this and gives advice