I'm signing up for classes, trying to pick up writing again, playing more video games with friends, going out a lot, and getting high off Delta-8. So far, I still feel down. I was just in the hospital back in February for actively suicidal thoughts. I don't want to go back. I'm not ACTIVELY suicidal right now, but I do have fleeting thoughts. I'd rather it not become active  again...though my sister-in-law (who's also bipolar) says its realistic to assume I'll be hospitalized many more times in my life. I've already been twice.

Thanks, bruh.

On another note, my own therapist thinks my bipolar diagnosis is a lie because I've never been hospitalized for mania AND my first manic episode was caused by medication. I mostly have depressed episodes...granted I definitely have periods where my energy is way up and I'm making a bunch of stupid decisions. I've flirted with people I barely knew, moved overseas on a whim, written fuckloads of chapters for projects, splurged hundreds of thousands of dollars on shit I didn't need, chewed people out because I was greatly irritated...that sounds like mania/hypomania to me lol.

Then again, she's one of those "vitamins can completely cure depression" types.