Just got off the line with a wonderful person who listened to everything I needed to unload and she endured it all without judgement and without any agenda besides steering me to resources and just listening.

70 minutes. This lady knows every intimate detail of my life. She was so kind. We spent the last 20 minutes cracking jokes and making each other laugh, which is why I felt the need to end the call - clearly I shouldn't hog the time of such a nice stranger, someone else probably needs her more than I do, and 70 minutes is already a lot.

So for anyone apprehensive about calling the suicide hotline, please, give it a try. They really are great people, or at least some are. It really brightened up my day. I have no illusions about what tomorrow likely holds, but it was just... it was nice. It was human. I didn't feel alone. And I needed that.