My dad could kick me out any day now and threatened to beat me up, I miss my boyfriend so much, I'm a closeted bi who will be torn to shreds if anybody in my family ever finds out, my only true friend is an online one I've known for nearly 8 years now, my autism and ADHD make my non-existent social life a living hell, I want to harm myself so badly, my dad has started calling me a manchild for being jobless at 17 (17! I'm still in high school!), I have no talents other than writing which probably won't get me very far to begin with, my dad bluntly told me he wishes one of my younger cousins was his child instead, I'm overweight...

I just want to cry more than anything, but I can't. Either because I was raised to never cry outside of funerals or because I used to be indifferent to the pain, but I really want to cry. I haven't cried ever since my boyfriend broke up with me over a year ago.