This was thanks to my mom, she convinced me to trust doctors, i was so obsessed with the side effects of medications constantly researching on reddit and asking questions to other strangers online about medications like they're a doctor or something ffs, I'm convinced now that only doctors can help me, i tried EVERYTHING, NEARLY EVERYTHING YOU CAN THINK OF , NOTHING HELPS, I FEEL LIKE A ZOMBIE, IM HALF DEAD, MY LIFE IS BEING RUINED BECAUSE OF MY MENTAL HEALTH, IM DONE WITH STUPID BS ADVICE I GET FROM STRANGERS ON ONLINE FORUMS, IM DONE WITH GOING INTO ONLINE FORUMS INSTEAD, IM GONNA GO AND GET MY LIFE BACK, IF I FAIL I CAN ALWAYS SUICIDE BUT ILL AT LEAST TRY IT WITH THE HELP OF DOCTORS, I DONT WANT TO SUFFER ANYMORE, I DIDN'T SLEEP FOR 2 YEARS FFS, IVE BEEN LIVING IN CONSTANT STATE OF ANXIETY FOR 2 YEARS, I CAN'T GET ANY RELIEF, ENOUGH !!!!!!! 

I SHOULD'VE LISTENED TO MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY EARLIER, I AVOIDED CUZ I WAS BRAINWASHED BY STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET TO NOT TRUST BIG PHARMA, IM DONE WITH THIS SH*T, ALL PEOPLE I KNOW WHO GOT DEPRESSED IS CURED BY THE HELP OF MEDICATIONS, IF ONLY I WERE TO SEE A DOCTOR EARLIER AND USED MEDS I WOULD'VE BEEN HEALED BY NOW, I DID A HUGE MISTAKES, NEVER AGAIN, I CAN ONLY KEEP MOVING FORWARD AND LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES, NOW I WILL DELETE REDDIT AND SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT WITH A GOOD PSYCHIATRIST, IM GOING BACK TO REAL LIFE, IF I TALK WITH ANOTHER ANONYMOUS STRANGER ON THE INTERNET IM GONNA F*CKING SCREAM

MUH JUST EXERCISE, JUST BREATH, JUST DRINK WATER, JUST DO THIS, HOW ABOUT JUST SEE A PSYCHIATRIST INSTEAD ? DUH

LET'S GOOOOOO