So I have an FP I really care for, But sadly when my mood is low, our relationship can be rocky. I really care about this person, I want to protect him from my behaviour when I am like how I can be, despite how understanding he tries to be, he doesn’t get it.
There is an element of idealising and then splitting when things are bad. This causes rage and he does not deserve that. He doesn’t deserve any of it.
He is someone I want to keep in my life desperately but I want the relationship to work for both of us. I want him to not feel like walking on egg shells and I want to safeguard him as much as possible from my BPD when I’m bad. I feel by trying to reframe him as less of an FP might really help? But is that possible? 
Is it possible to reframe but still remain close? 
I feel at this point if I can’t find a means to do so I am going to end up wanting to get rid of the relationship as I don’t want to hurt him anymore from what I am like and can be - he means too much.