Since I’ve failed my exams I’ve been feeling really depressed and thought a lot about killing myself. Today I got a very hard day and while walking my dog I said fuck it and called 147 (suicide hotline in my country). The lady was very nice and she actually understood me. After 30 min she suggested that since I don’t have any money I can go to emergency and even a psychological emergency is paid by my insurance. I was like ok I’m going to do this, I don’t have anything to loose and maybe a nice psychiatrist will help me just a little, at least for today so I can survive. I’m the hospital I met 2 nurses, very nice, and after that a doctor, she wasn’t really competent in that field but she tried her best. After a long talk she told me that there is no psychiatry there (it’s a small hospital) and that she called an ambulance for me so they can transport me to another hospital in another city. I wasn’t ready for that and said that I’d rather go home and ask my mum to take me there. I was a little scared and I actually had to walk my dog  in the evening and didn’t wanted to go too far . But she said that the ambulance is already coming and that they can’t let me go since i was a danger to myself. I was like oh okay. I mean at least I will see a psychiatrist and my time spender in the hospital wasn’t for nothing. Again I met a nurse and a psychiatrist and they told me that I have a choice I can leave but they are scared that i will kill myself or I can stay and they will try to help me. Also they said that if I try to kill myself and if anybody find me before I die I will be legally forced to stay in a mental institution. I decided to stay. Well, this day was kinda unexpected. I juste wanted to share my story. Sorry for my poor english://