I am losing hope. The only medicine that I've found helps my mood is Seroquel. I take it at 8:30pm and half an hour later I am very groggy and sluggish so I usually go right to sleep. It's not until 11 or 12 the next day that I can get up. And even when I do, I feel sluggish until around 3 or 4. Being asleep for so long, missing most of my day, is taking a toll on me. It's been doable over the summer since I'm not taking classes or working now but shortly I will need to make it to classes, some of which are only offered in the morning, and expend a lot of energy and effort towards these classes which certainly requires more time than I have. 

Last semester, I tried, for the hundreth time, to get off of Seroquel and switch to something less sedating. For two months I was off Seroquel, trying other medicines, my anxiety grew out of control, I was extremely emotional. To top things off, I could barely sleep without the Seroquel, even when I was two months off it and using a sleep aid. 

I've been trying since I was 14 (I'm 24 now) to find a med other than Seroquel that works and I haven't found one. My doctor doesn't even know what to prescribe next because I've tried so many and they all failed. 

Before anyone suggests a lower dose, I'm only on 100mg and I've tried lower doses. They've been ineffective towards my mood but still carried the same level of sedation. 

I have 3 ish years until I finish my degree (if i can manage a full load each semester, which I probably cant). When I turn 26, I'll be off my parents health insurance and will need to find a full-time job in order to have insurance, yet I can't work a full-time job on Seroquel. But I can't get off Seroquel and feel any sort of stability.

To make matters worse, I'm having such a difficult time with my memory. Idk if this is because of the Seroquel, or if it's unrelated. My doctor says it's not a typical Seroquel side effect. But I can't remember things long term. For instance, if I watched a movie today and then tried to recall the plot of the movie tomorrow, before watching the sequel, I wouldn't be able to remember the plot. I failed my math class last semester because of this. There were over 40 formulas I needed to remember and I could barely remember the basic concepts of the class, let alone all the formulas. I'm retaking the class this semester but I'm doubtful I will pass. This isn't me just being hard on myself and pessimistic. I truly don't have the time in the day to be forgetting so much of what I learn. 

It just doesn't seem like there is an answer, a way where I can be a functioning AND stable human being. It doesn't seem like much to ask for but yet, I can't be both. I only have 2 years to figure it out. Since I'm 10 years into this, 2 years doesn't feel like enough time to figure this out. I feel lost.