Summer makes me so anxious. At the beginning of every summer i get bad panic attacks accompanied with anxiety in between. It lasts for a week atleast, this year even longer. I think something about the warmth, blue skys, and blooming greenery just terrify me for whatever reason. I think maybe I’m scared of my past. I’m 24 but I’ve made so many mistakes in my life. So many summers filled with hating myself, a serious drug addiction, and poor decisions. Now that I’ve got my shit together summer scares me. I’m scared of all this free time i have (semesters over), I’m so nervous, i just feel so scared. I’m scared I’ll never feel normal again. I just don’t know why i am this way and i just need to vent