Hey so I’m 17 rn and turning 18 in a few months. I haven’t been doing too well over the last couple of months. 

I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety since I was around 6 or 7. The depression has stayed with me since then. Sometimes but very rarely it’ll go away or disappear for a while but no longer than a month or two. I don’t know if that’s normal or not. I was told by my counselor that my depression is some of the worst she has seen. The anxiety is always there and never disappears.

I use to see things when I was younger. Idk it’s hard to explain. But it use to be like a figure or something. Thankfully I haven’t seen it in a long time. I also use to hear voices. These voices would be people I knew in my life. They would say a few words then disappear. I still hear them but they are rare.

I’m constantly angry as well. I seem like a friendly and nice person on the outside. But on the inside I’m angry. And for no reason. Idk why. Ill be talking to someone and I’ll get mad at them. Even if they aren’t doing something wrong. I don’t want to feel this way but it happens. Idk why I get such violent thoughts.

I didn’t have the best childhood. I never got along with my mom. She took her anger out on me. Everyone in my life admits that she was wrong but say it’s okay cause she was not doing too good. That’s still not a excuse. I use to hate thinking about going back home and would get horrible anxiety thinking about it while at school.

My friend that has dealt with some of the same things I’m going through says I should see a doctor. And maybe even a therapist. 

Idk what to do. What do you guys think I should do? Should I go to therapy? What is causing this? 

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I know it was long and I’m sorry about that. I appreciate any advice!