as someone with bpd, i do a lot of impulsive things, mostly fuelled by rage and frustration. 

the thing is that whenever i do something shitty, i always play the victim and try to get whoever involved feel bad for me. i know im in the wrong, but it's so hard to just step back and realise what ive done. 

how do i apologise/ make it up to those affected by my actions? saying sorry sometimes isn't enough.