i’ve lived in a really unstable home all my life, never really had my parents around growing up. my dad left when i was three so it was just me and my mom, she was a hard worker and did everything she could for the both of us, but was also a big drinker. so i was never home a lot growing up and i didn’t see her alot, around the beginning of high school she stopped drinking all together. things got worse and she quit her job later on, she said it was because of extreme anxiety, but i found out a little bit after that she has been doing opiods for really long time. then it got worse and she had to have roomates live with us to help pay bills. all the people who lived with us were homeless and some of them were doing heroin or some drug with needles. some other stuff happened that’s hard for me to talk about but my mom was leaving for like a week and then coming back for a few days and then leaving again for a while and then coming back for a few days. one day everyone was gone and i left and moved into a room to rent in someone’s house.

it’s been 7 months since, i was 17 when i left. i’m 18 now, i’m about to finish my last year of highschool. since i left tho. i’ve been struggling with my thoughts and my mental health, i’ve been remembering a lot of situations i’ve been in when i was little kid and sometimes i don’t think they’re real and some i think aren’t as big as of a problem the others do. i’ve been talking to a lot of my friends and when i tell them these situations, they never have much to say or none at all, but i can see how much the feel sorry and care for me. i always think everyone’s out to get me and i always feel guilty, i just would like to relate to someone and hear some advice about depression and things i can do so i don’t feel so numb and alone .