It makes me sooooooo depressed. I’ve never seen people speak with such venom about any other mental disorder as they do about BPD. 

People talk like we’re not even human. Not only are we not human but we’re also not worth trying to help or understand because we’re a lost cause. And that’s really scary. It bothers me so much that it’s almost enough to send me into

Then it starts the cogs of my mind going and I start thinking, maybe they’re right. Maybe I am supremely evil. Maybe I deserve everything that’s happened in my life and more. 

It’s like I honestly don’t know what to believe. I have zero self worth and so it’s hard not to let all the things people say get to me. 

The thing that really really pisses me off is that despite my family’s vehement denial, it is extremely obvious they there is still an edge to how they treat me. It’s blindingly obvious. They’re so sick of me and who I am that they’re just gritting their teeth, through it all. 

I’m just done. I sometimes wonder if this is what Hell really is and I’m in it right now. 