Just read this article;“Extreme Goal Setting and Vulnerability to Mania Among Undiagnosed Young Adults”
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2829854/

Can anyone relate?


Ok so, I was just diagnosed with BP1 and PTSD in May 2021 at the age of 25.    (Not the purpose of this post, buuuut it took me getting really sick until I was finally taken seriously).. anyways;

Growing up, I was always so high achieving and hardworking in academics and athletics, and in the back of my head I always thought I was destined for something greater (I think this was the first sign of my predisposition to BP). I didn’t have much of a social life really because I mostly only found self-confidence in my achievements. I wasn’t around many people as a kid and as a teenager who I thought could relate to me. What I committed myself to I was obsessed with, and saw all of my actions as part of this big picture I had in mind for myself. There were other signs of mental illness emerging during this time as well, and in retrospect, def pointed towards BP.   

My parents always were impressed/concerned with how big my hopes and dreams were, but I was reaching these goals and doing incredible things. Buuuut after experiencing so much terrible trauma in university and completely crashing and burning, I became stuck, almost like my mind was in knots. Like a shell of myself. And more symptoms were coming up.

Anyways, now that I am finally on the right meds, I feel like I can move forward, stable but still a bit fragile. That mourning process of lost years is gruelling tho… 
Also tons of weed and then dabbling w shrooms (but in a big way)to try and self medicate my gruelling symptoms after just never getting a proper diagnosis, along with my doc tripling my Prozac… made me deliriously manic, then hospitalized, now on proper meds. I believe substances got me to that #1 BP diagnostic spot🤩 it’s been a journey, but putting the pieces together is fascinating to me