I ran a search so I wasn't sure if I posted asking about this. Anyway, I just woke about 30 mins ago and, as usual, I have that feeling of butterflies. I do recall reading a while back that it can have to do with lack of blood flow to that area, under high-stress situations. Apparently in stressful situations our stomach are not much use, so the body diverts blood where its most useful.   


For those who get this often, how do you handle it? It happens to me 4-6 days a week, usually. I was thinking its just unresolved life experiences over the years that causes it, but nothing in particular comes to mind. I have seen therapists and psychiatrists about it, and they were all useless. If I had to put a time on how long its been going on, I would say approx 2 years. It is honestly a living hell. I feel as tho I am being constantly being tortured. It has gotten to the point to where I am drinking basically every other day, only beer, but still. Ftr, this started long before I began drinking like I have been. It is also very much understood that drinking to catch a buzz is doing nothing but making it worse.  There are some days that it does not happen, and then I actually feel high. All I want is to feel normal again. This pain is exactly what I felt prior to when I started to have 1-2 panic attacks per day, which lasted about 6 yrs.   


The issue is that I think about having to wake up and feel this pain. I'll suck down a 12 pack of beer just to not feel like shit, only to wake and feel this way. At no point do I feel hungover, in case anyone is wondering. Again, this all started long before I started to drink. There is no dehydration, just a feeling of near-panic anxiety. When I get to work, I work extra hard just to forget about it, which usually works. People told me to "stay busy" back when it first started to happen, anxiety that is. I understand anxiety is typically useful, but thats during fight-or-flight, but should never be part of  a typical routine.   


Also, my diet has not been particularly great for the past few months. That as well as drinking is basically a result of feeling as tho I am constantly being punched in the gut, only for a hoard of butterflies with razor blade wings to be released. Apologies for the tl;dr, but I am seriously near my breaking point.