This shall pass too, like I've endured many such situations :) but
It's just hard, i have to stop betraying myself.

I am crying out my eyes just because today i betrayed myself when i let someone else's opinion about me define who I'm, and i was in self pity and felt insignificant when I was with my classmates, I've no idea why my college classmates are so terrible, they makes me feel dumb even tho i work hard hard and is capable as much as them. 
How can one feel enough, when people around you isolate you, ignore Your opinions, and label as if you're incapable...  i made it to final year of Med school, i believe in myself, yet, when I'm in college these people's presence makes me feel worthless. 

Perhaps it must be my low self esteem which is making me always stay behind and cry about lack of opportunities, i should have been Assertive, instead now I'm push over. 
It's true tho, if you don't respect yourself, nobody else will, if you've no to very less opinions about things, and is very aggreable and meek, other people will always walk over you and take advantage of you. 

I don't know, i was told to be nice, irrespective of how they are, i am always nice to them but why do i get treated bad. 
most girls in my class are selfish and with a big ego. Idk why do they look so down on me. As if they are cut from a superior stone.
I wish I could stand with confidence, as I should be. But not everyone had similar circumstances while growing up, due to critical environment i was brought up in and i was told self belittling things when i was younger, now as an adult, i try so hard to get liked by everyone and i act very nice and genuine, so as to fulfill my insecurities i feel about myself.

I wish I wasn't taken for granted everyday. I wish I could find genuine friends. I don't like anyone here in my city, they are all fake and with a shitty personality except for my parents and family i don't know too many people anyways, it's just my family. They are the only reason that gives me a push to move ahead in life depsite the worthlessness i feel everyday after every encounter with my classmates. 

I wish someone appreciated me for my goodness. I'm a good person but I'm weak too. I'm not strong enough to bear with mistreatment or say fuck it and move on. I bear the cost of mistreatment and cry over it as if the way they treated me is because something is inherently wrong with me. Or they ignored me because im incapable or ugly... 

There are certain girls, who act nice to me only when they need something from me, other times they ignore me, it just hurts as if I'm something useless and disposable...

I wish I could show middle finger to all those assholes and walk away fucking confidently, unfortunately i can't as i have a motherfucking big heart and I'll end up worrying about it.