I have been dealing with depression for a long time now, i am taking antidepressants that my psychiatrist gave me however i just dont see the point anymore. 

I have been fighting for so long and nothing changed too give a little info on myself im a very kindhearted person i hate seeing people in pain, i am 20 years old now at least i think my memory has gotten worse or maybe i just stopped caring.
I never had a girlfriend since i never leave my house and i also dont think anyone would be interested in me in general so why bother trying...
I wasnt able to do any job as of now since i have severe anxiety on top off my depression the list only gets better also it doesn't mean i didn't try getting a job because i obviously need one...
I tried killing myself a few times however seeing my parents cry for my sake made me want to hold on and since then i have been fighting for their sake not mine i dont mind dying or just dissappearing...

So in general i think off myself as worthless and a waste off oxygen and my opinion never changed on myself, im still a virgin so im also getting made fun of for that wich i still dont understand why do people care so much about the fact someone is still a virgin? It doesn't hurt me anymore being insulted for being one nor does most other things not hurt me i have been getting numb too my feelings as off lately and my psychiatrist said that thats not really a good thing so thats that.

In general im Posting here too just vent my inner thoughts a little since i cant really fall asleep otherwise.
Thanks for reading this waste off your time i do appreciate it