Hi. Basically I was speaking to this one guy and ended things because I randomly got pissed of at him and blew up. Anyway, the issue is that throughout the relationship I realized how I didn’t have that many feelings for him. I kept him because the thought of him being with another girl pissed me off. Anyway, I know he will come back to me and forgive me if I speak to him first no matter what happened. I was terrible to him in the relationship and I realize that, but he’s such a good friend to me and although I don’t like him romantically I do appreciate his existence. The problem is MY existence isn’t good for him. I acknowledge it and know that if I keep going back to him he will end up getting extremely hurt. I feel this urge to speak to him even if I repeatedly willingly hurt, upset, and manipulated him in the past. It isn’t good for him, but I like his existence and I’m certain he will allow me to speak to him again. I feel like I want to speak to him because I don’t have someone who’s as emotional as he is now. I genuinely despise having this desire and I know I’m not good for his health at all so what should I do? I know “don’t do it” is the right answer, but what now? I feel so bored.