I can’t help but to think everytime I do something for my boyfriend, he has to get even. Like a point system in my head. An example is like “I initiated sex this time, so next time he has to or we won’t have sex” or “I asked to hang out this time, so next time he has to ask or we won’t hang out”. Even with random gifts, I get him surprise gifts, so somewhere in my mind I think “Ok I can’t give another one until he gets even and gets me one”. My love language is gift giving &amp; Acts of service. Idk if that’s what plays part. Or how I was raised. When my parents felt like I was upset or anything, Id simply be given money or to get food etc. It drives me insane because I DONT WANNA THINK LIKE THIS! He doesn’t owe me anything just because I decided to do something nice. It should always come and stay with the intention that I just wanted to do something nice for him. I dont do anything with the thought “ok he owes me”  but some reason after I start to feel that way. And it makes me feel so guilty. A relationship should flow, and me thinking this way makes me feel like i’m going to ruin it with him.