For the first time in my life in a long time I’m surrounded by people and I don’t have an obsessive favorite in fixating on being with. There is no knight in shining armor or damsel in distress. It’s just me and tons of different people I interact with. I’ve gotten so used to operating through the frame work of bpd relationships that this feels strange. Like yeah I love some people or feel close to them but I also can see other people and I can accept things that make them happy that don’t involve me. I’m accepting rejection and hard moments. I’m actually moving forward and making meaningful connections and memories. I’m on my own but in the way where I’m surrounded by cool people and free to be me. I don’t have to fall in love with everyone. I don’t need to be saved. I am totally comfortable just being myself and im really happy that way. I was trying to find an fp or someone to thrown myself into. Some sort of unhealthy coping mechanism. But idk im just ok without it. Im not perfect but im a person and that’s good enough. I may be single and have lots of new relationships, but I know they’ll grow to become very big and there are people I don’t even know yet. There are so many moments and experiences I’ve not had why would I waste time trying to force them when they can just happen naturally?