I think I have a problem with drinking but it makes me so much happier and I feel alive. Whenever I feel on edge or really depressed, I drink to cope then feel better. Even when I'm not sober I never feel suicidal, I feel so alive inside.

I have tried experiments where I go without it for weeks and I have noticed I have the same feelings of depression as before I ever started drinking.

I understand its a depressant but I seriously feel better with it. Nothing works without it. No therapy or medication seems to want to work.

I'm sober right now and feel so broken. I just want to be content with life and not feel like killing myself every second of the day sober.