I know I deserve to feel like this and killing myself would just be running away from the problems I caused. It's selfish and would put burdens upon others.

I'm tired. Of trying to find a place to live. Or being alone. I do want to die, more than anything anymore. I don't even know what to do. I've forced myself to function for the past year, and I just feel it breaking down. Getting going every morning. Work. Eating. It's all too much effort anymore. I don't care about anything, I just hate myself.