How can I make the ones I love understand, that I love them even when I tell them that I don’t? How can I make the ones I love understand that I want to live, even though I wish I were dead? 
That how most days it seems easier if I were something else instead. 
How can I make one understand what’s it’s like to not be in control. To be thinking and talking and breathing but be utterly helpless. When the words you speak aren’t yours and you don’t even know where they came from. When it all comes down and you wonder, how did I get here? 
How can I make the ones I love understand how it is to live each day in fear.

How can I expect the ones I love to understand a day in the life of me.
When at the end of the day when I look in the mirror, I have no idea what I see.