How many of you struggle with being functional adults? I've never held down a job for more than a few months. I consider myself lucky if I can find the will to get out of bed and bathe. On surface it may not seem like anything. I've learnt to present a heteronormative appearance. Hell, when I'm not in the throes of a down swing I can convince myself there's nothing wrong wrong with me. I don't really know if I'll ever feel anything less than extremes of emotions. My brain is constantly in overdrive and I really really envy people who don't know what it's like to be in fight or flight mode for a whole decade so that it becomes normal for you, and you start to mimic behaviour that makes you look fine because you don't want to trouble anyone, god forbid they don't like you, while your brain has physically altered and will most likely never be the same. But good luck explaining that to your parents to who it just doesn't make sense that after throwing thousands of rupees into therapy, you're still a let down.