Hi guys. So I'm not quite sure, wether this actually belongs here, this is my first post on this sub and therefore I'm a bit confused. So feel free to tell my, if this isn't the place for this kind of posts!

So. I got diagnosed yesterday. And even though the diagnosis wasn't a surprise, I still have problems actually accepting it.  In an attempt to "prove" that I don't suffer from BD I decided to drink a ton of coffee. In retrospect I'm not quite sure what exactly led to this decision.

As expected I feel like shit and totally regret it. I am nervous, sweaty, irritated and ready to leave in to the night. I've already hit up some of my friends and asked them, wether they'd like to spent some time with me or go for a drink, but they all just told me, that I once again "have to much energy" as they like to call it. They all adviced me on going to sleep and don't leave the house because there's a storm warning in my area. But what they don't understand is, is that I'm literally suffocating in my room. I just have to leave. Like right now. I know that I shouldn't and I probably won't do it, because I'm aware that this would be a really bad decisions. I have done this several times before and it never led to a happy end.

Nevertheless I'm still in this hell like state of mind and I just don't know how to cope. I'm afraid , that I won't leave this state anytime soon and I feel like a giant idiot for inducing it in the first place.

I would be thankful for any form of advice.