for as long as i remember, since being a kid, i’ve just had the worst perspective of mortality. all i think about is death. death of who i’m talking to, death of myself, death of relatives, death of pets. it seems like the subject in any daily interaction. 

it could be a family movie night and i will just sit there thinking about how there’ll be a day where my parents are gone, a day where i’m the oldest living relative of my bloodline. there’ll be a day where my dog who i adore will die, it brings tears to my eyes. but there’s nothing that can distract me from these thoughts. they just sit and grow until i spiral.