Hello, I am a quiet borderline and I often feel like I know what to say to doctors, and thus I impulsively say things. The only thing I have a filter on is my emotion/mood. I have been trying to tell people that I honestly think I'm getting worse - that my life is hanging on thin lines. 

I have tried for years to feel better and feel "normal" ... though my normal has been ingrained in my head so much that change is very hard. 

As I am so stubborn, I feel that the only way to progress and get better is to have an inpatient intervention where I HAVE to change. I have only very recently been diagnosed and have become more aware to my actions more and more but changing them is very hard as I feel like I am living for others and not myself. I have been put on a waiting list for MBT - so I am hoping that there is some form of inpatient route....