My boyfriend has been depressed for a while now. He did a realy great job at hiding it from everyone around him, but after i kept asking him what's wrong, he cracked.

Basicly, his whole life has been nothing but struggle. From 9 years old, he has spent all of his free time studying because otherwise he would't pass his classes. 10 years later he is still studying every day. But not only the studying makes him depressed, his whole school career has been nothing but pure torture to him. Getting bullied for as long as he can remember.. 

Also, since he has come out of the closet, his dad hasn't been happy about it. Being mad when he wears nail pollish, something he really likes doing. 

He says that i'm currently the only reason he's still alive and talks about suicide too often. He even told me that he had a suicide note in his pencil case when in elementery school. Elementery school! He also frequently says that he wants to be 'livend'. Something he read online. It means being somewhere between dead and alive...

I honestly don't know what the fuck i should do and am totally lost. Everytime i talk to him about it, he only tells a bit and than gets sad making me feel like the bad guy, which obviously isn't his intention. I understand that he gets sad ofcourse, but i want to do something to help him feel less shitty because i can't take much longer seeing the most important thing in my life depressed all the time. All i do now is telling him how valued he is and that i love him so very much all the time.

Please reddit, i'm begging. Tell me what i can do.