i know bpd makes us all take small things very hard, it can make us serious and intense, so i really hope that you can clear just enough space in your heart to feel a sense of lightness soon. i hope you feel like a white sunbeam when its freezing outside; or a crystal; or the clearest ocean; or a fire lantern; or a candle flame. and i hope that the longer you try, the more you can hang onto that feeling of light, because you all have allowed me to feel a sense of lightness by making me feel like i wasnt alone in this. its scary to keep trying to be better when we trick ourselves into feeling like failures, but we aren't failing. healing is like waking up over and over again. yesterday i saw someone posted on here asking people to list their favorite positive qualities that come with having bpd, and most people answered **empathy** and/or **passion**. i think those are the most beautiful things someone can be, and theyre key in managing bpd. i was watching the new emilia fart video yesterday (titled "the truth") - regardless of whether or not youre a fan of hers - the main point was that **your 'fire' or 'spark' is on the other side of your pain.** its a lot to work through your pain; its uncomfortable work, it tests your patience, it feels like there are a lot of lies that your mind tries to get you to believe in order to hang onto your pain / current state / give up, but then suddenly youre reborn or waking up over and over again. healing and awakening and a new flame / new light. (progress / healing isn't a straight line; it fluctuates, its like ocean waves) 

&amp;#x200B;

this post might be lame but im so grateful for everyone who takes up space here, posting about your own struggles / frustrations &amp; listening to mine. i only found this subreddit a few days ago and its literally the first time in my life i havent felt alone in dealing with all of this and it has helped me breathe easier about it all. thank you everyone for creating a bit of lightness and helping me cope the past few days. i know this post is lame but you guys mean a lot and everyone on here is trying really hard to be better, for yourself and for the people u love, and that is really beautiful and sweet. **i think we are fiery people, and i hope we can continue nourishing our empathy / passion to create lightness and become the type of fire we want to be.** 