I feel so guilty for getting myself hospitalized. I sent my friend a suicide note then left my phone behind in a manic episode to go to the park. When I came back there were cops there and the rude social worker deemed me not safe and I was hospitalized and left with a huge bill. I can’t hold a normal job so I work side jobs that barely support me and most of my money comes from dwindling savings. I just had a really bad argument with the friend who called and she said “I should’ve taken my phone” she apologized right after but it really upset me. I just got out of the mindset of feeling guilty for not being in the right headspace and taking my phone. I’m stuck with this huge bill and idk what to do. I just got done being houseless. I wish I could just dissapear.