im 22 and I want to put myself out there, I was ready until I had a mental breakdown and ghosted everyone for 3months. I’m back to talking to everyone again but I’m still keeping my distance.

Ive been like this since highschool except I really didnt want to speak to anyone so I didnt, I started to hang with the quiet group bc they left me alone and didnt expect me to talk. My therapist thinks I have ptsd from childhood sexual abuse but no diagnosis bc she said she’s not qualified. Im doing much better than highschool but still feel afraid of being noticed. I can finally socialise again but sometimes I have phases or I get triggered.

I go to university tomorrow and anxious to put myself out there and be noticed. I just dont want to be noticed but at the same time im not having fun living my life like this. I just want to enjoy my life without having to feel hyper vigilant all the time. Im not feeling good rn. My weight is low as well. 

Do you have any tips for me?