I only have 6 more hours to fall asleep before i have to go to school tomorrow….but I can’t stop thinking about what reasons I have to live. It makes my stomach drop thinking about how iv spend my days doing completely nothing….  and spending all y time by myself. I have this deep fear of being forgotten and being lonely. Even tho im still young and have many people in my life… i feel like my presence doesn’t matter. I just don’t know how to talk or form any bond with them. I can’t seem to form a connection with anyone in real life, it’s like everyone I was close with seems like a stranger. Or that iv become a stranger to everyone and myself. It’s been like this for years tho, so iv become more desensitized to loneliness and distance but sometime it just hits me.