I am 35 years old, and have had depression since I was 19, with little intervals of peace.

I'm wrong again now. Several things have come together again.

I left my previous job of 6 years because I was very fed up, especially the last year, with how the bosses in that company treated me and how little I was valued.

I've changed to the company, I've been 5 weeks and I don't finish fitting in, I don't know. I'm not sorry about leaving the other job, but I still don't know if this new position was the right one.

My family is having a hard time. My grandmother has had senile dementia for several years and she has gotten worse. She attacks my parents, she insults people through the window at home so we can't let her out of it. Several times there has been a near fire or explosion because my grandmother leaves the gas on and goes away, and luckily we realized it before anything happened. We are trying to get my grandmother a place in a nursing home.

My sister is going to have her second child at the same time that my brother-in-law has lost her job, and she does not plan to look for another one, she plans to spend a year collecting unemployment benefits preparing for an exam and becoming a public official. So my parents and I will have to help them financially.

I... I'm very lonely. I've never been good with people. I have no friends, no partner. I have never had a serious girlfriend.

And I do not see that anything improves, look where I look, everything makes me sad. Because people go on with their lives and I feel bad. On TV they only show hate, mixed with fear. Everything that happens in the world today makes me want to leave this world and never come back.

&amp;#x200B;

I hope I never feel so alone