Hello guys, I would like hear some words of encouragement and advice, so if you could help me I would be so grateful!

Me and my current partner love each other very much, we want to be together, but somehow it is really hard to keep the peace. 

For several reasons:

1) Both our moms have BPD, something that we have acknowledged as a couple, because both of us sometimes have BPD outbursts, that we recognise and are trying always to contain, we are trying meditation now.

2) My first boyfriend was a Narcissist, after I broke up with him, I never healed properly, I partied and stoned myself, thinking I was free and it was over, but now 6 years later and sober I see it is not, I often have nightmares about him and the situation I was in back then, and I get emotional flashbacks which trigger insecurities and problems in my current relationship.

Because of my past insecurities I have sabotaged the relationship, and he has been patient and loving to stay with me. I am aware that my insecurities are an issue, and I think maybe letting my guard down, and being more vulnerable (https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability), could help me. He is committed to the relationship, so because of our erratic past behaviour he often dreams I leave him.

Is it possible for me and my partner to get thru this? If so, what are some techniques or steps to follow to grow and not be affected by our past situations?

Thank you very much for your help.