this goes along w the flairs: "Relationships, urgent coping skill needing, venting, input, and perspective needed, DAE, person w/o BPD," are multiple posts allowed so I can add these flairs, or is there a way to do it w/o making multiple posts? I don't have my therapist on hand... The company I'm at only provides coach texting/phone calling if your signed up to be in a DBT group, which I'm not ready at all to do again for a 3rd year after 2 years of doing it already in HS..... so since I don't have my therapist, and I only go to abt 2 friends I talk to, and the cousin I have that has bpd, she's been going through it rough and sometimes Ik it's not a safe area for anyone to be bothered when they're going through a rough time too, as I myself wouldn't want that so I try to give space to others.... Can anyone help me understand, or at least try to understand, or try to maybe validate or just say they have this problem too (issue fixed or not,).... My issue is w my dad and my bf, when my dad is done working, he likes to sit down on the couch and sometimes either watch tv or rest his eyes. Completely understandable I get that way too when I've been working on the computer for file stuff since I've been doing that recently. But what I don't understand is I asked him to notify me at least 5mins before he sits down so I can move whatever is in his spot (feet and couch area) so that way I can move it and he doesn't have to move it in places where I don't want it move, or I don't like how it's sitting.I'm very particular abt how my stuff is sat/placed,and I would have hoped by now he would understand that, because he has to stay at home for work, and so his files and papers, etc... are placed down in certain piles and areas all over where he works and he doesn't like people touching them, moving them, or stepping on them. He even complains or talks to my mom sometimes abt my cat or the family dog stepping on them and sometimes accidentally crinkling the papers or moving them out of place..... So you would think he would understand my point of view right?? Well, I've been trying so hard to get him to understand by saying the same thing but w/o mentioning he has the same issue w his stuff, (or maybe I did I've forgotten since this has been an ongoing issue for abt 2-3 months now.) But now the issue has graduated to my bf while I'm staying at his house for a period of time throughout the week. and he has a similar straightforward, logical mindset as my dad and that's just the way they both think, I've accepted that, but I'm not sure why we still continue to bombard and collide w myself and my dad, and most recently w my bf. This happens w my dad when I'm staying at the house for a couple of days while I'm not at my bf's house. Because he's graduated from college I'm staying at his house little more now so it's always hard to tell when I'll be coming back to my parents house. W my bf, the situation is a little diff because he's more understanding of me because he has slight depression when he gets depressed, comes on very suddenly like mine does, and he has slight add/adhd more of add though, and he has sometimes moderate to severe anxiety but it was worse during schooling. which make sense, since he was in nursing school which is abt just as rough as psychology school (which I was in for) so we both really understand each other when it comes to all those disorders coming into our way of mind and thinking/processing. Can someone suggest anything what to do here? Or if not maybe at least validate they have the same issue as I've said in the beginning? because I'm just really at a lost of what to do.... and as ya'll know, when people wBPD get at a certain level beyond red zone which sometimes you don't realize your in it until your actually in it, and little bit after, it becomes way out of your control and you feel out of control and like you've lost all hope to even try to do anything abs whatever the situation is. And this is worse when you've accidentally taken your medication at a later time, and I take mine usually after I get up from my nap, and I nap in the afternoon because my brain is up all night from either anxiety, or ADD and can't sleep cause of those 2 factors... and because of this I just end unsleeping after I get up.... and I get really pissed off of this as well. So I already know that comes a factor into this out of control state.