I suffer from really bad self esteem. I've tried to get better but with no success. Sure I can list out the good parts of me and try to find some self worth from that, but I never seem to improve. I spend all of my time tearing myself down and hating every part of myself, and I have no idea how to fix it. I'm in a long distance relationship with an amazing girl, who had helped me through depression in the past. I noticed that recently I have been having a lot of relationship anxiety, and I think it comes from my low self esteem. Shes a lot busier than I am, and it takes her a while to reply to texts sometimes. That's fine and all, but stuff like that causes me to become super anxious about her, and I'll worry about whether or not shes safe. Recently I worry a lot about whether or not she really loves me, even though I know she does. I spend so much time asking for reassurance and talking about my problems, that its harming the relationship. Today we talked about it and decided that I have become much too dependent on her emotionally. We made the decision to communicate a lot less for a week or two, so that I can get some space and figure this out. I have no idea how to fix this though. I've looked at all this stuff online and nothing helps. It's like nothing I can do will change the fact that I hate myself. Even when I know that whatever thing in worrying about is irrelevant, it still wont let up. I'm scheduled to start therapy in 2 weeks, but I dont know what to do with myself before then. Does anyone have any advice?