Hello guys, I really need help. i think im suffering from anxiety disorder. its really hard for me to concentrate/focus on a small things, It's like Im a useless person and i dont even know whats happening with me. I woke up every day with one thing in my mind how to kill myself. I have some symptoms that i observe i get nervous and confuse while talking to the persons that i know. It's very hard for me to remember even a small events memories. I can't even focus while reading a books.

The most important problem Im facing is the fear of speaking in a class, I always have one thing in my mind and that it is "what if i say something wrong and the whole class will make a fun over me" I keep this one thing in my mind a don't even speak in a class and pretend like im doing all good and cracking those jokes and fake smile in my face only just to pretend like im doing all good.

Please if any psychiatrist is reading this please help this stranger. This stranger can't afford for his therapist and come here for a help. Please!