I was at a friends house drinking wine tonight. We decided to go to a club for a dance. 

After being there for a little while  I started freaking out being anxious and feeling like everyone was judging me.

I  left and walked home by myself but have just taken 20mg Oxycodone, 20mg Ritalin, 30mg Valdoxan, 60mg Mirtazapine. I'm feeling horrible.. For some stupid reason I just want to be taken into a private psych ward for the next few days to protect me from myself. (x-post to r/bpd). 
I'm not really looking for any answers just venting because I don;t feel like I can tell any of my friends what I just did.
I don't want to die I just want to get away from life for a while.


(x-posted to /r/depression).