Hello my fellow redditors, sorry for my bad english btw

I just want to know that I don't know where to put this, this is probably something that everyone involved has already probably forgot

When I broke with my first girlfriend (it was the second I was like 15) I have the longest episode of impulsiveness and anger and just a mess of emotions (I was like that all the f**** high school).

Basically when she broke up with me (the second time) I didn't know how to manage it and become kind of a stalker , waiting for her trying to talk to her, I feel so ashamed for doing this

My home situation and friends at that moment didn't help much, my mom was like "good she wasn't pretty" or "she was crazy" or my dad one I told him he was like "I hope you didn't make a show when she broke up with you" and things like that, and my friends were just tired of my overwhelming emotions that didn't want to be around me when I was having an episode.

I don't know why I did that, I hate it, I didn't felt supported emotionally by anyone, or that what I felt maybe, my emotions where just too much for anyone else I guess

I also feel shame while writing this, a teenage years break up is something that for everyone else is just silly, but people don't understand that I just didn't felt supported or guided, I was left alone to just damage me and others, I realize a just don't have any emotional support and that dating and relationship are something to be careful and afraid of

People will laugh because it seems like and just crying about a girl that broke up with me 10 years ago

I'm currently on a relationship but the last few weeks been having this fear of having an episode

Btw, if you think this post is maybe more suitable for another sub reddit let me know ;)

(Sorry for the bad structure, my speech is usually disorganized)