I have been feeling down lately. Depression and Anxiety have destroyed my school year. Subjects such as mathematics and chemistry that seemed so fascinating have now become boring and less interesting. I used to look up everyday and wondered how things worked in the universe, but now instead I just stay in my room and sleep. My GPA and grades have gone to shit, with my G.P.A going from a 3.7 to a 2.99 in a matter of two semesters in college. Lack of employment and the ability to help my parents out, especially my mom have added huge amounts of pressure on me. I have had jobs before, but they were either temporary or I got a higher paying job, and then let go because it was temporary. I am 23 years old, and to be honest I see no future for myself. Curiosity used to drive me forward, that feeling to want to understand the foundation of our universe, and even invent or innovate, so we can strive for bigger and better things. But, now all that is just a distant memory. I am having trouble Calculus even though I understand the subject. I feel like a total fuck up, and a disappointment to my family. I often dreamed of success and wanting to be successful but now it is all gone because my mind has become familiar with failure. I have seeked helped, but its often treated with the same approach of prescription medication, and being treated as if it worked for this person, then it will work for this person. Ignoring that all minds are different, and not all are going to be treated the same way. I have thought of joining the military to have my mentally changed or fixed, but I dont know what to do at this point. 