My partner recently has gotten into this horrible cycle of one night absolutely hating me, crying, relapsing into self-harm, and the other being in idealized love. It especially picked up after I gave her oral; I suppose we moved along too quickly -- intimately. 

I think I get it &amp; it's fine, but; it's also harming to me &amp; I want to figure out if there's an optimal way to deal with this scenario to bring her out of this cycle? (Just recently after years of believing they had BPD they now deny it calling themselves 'weak' or 'pathetic', denying that I love them because 'they cannot be lovable' etc). 

Sometimes I wonder in the heat of the moment as she's pained so much if we should 'take a break', or if she'd be better off single for her own good. I don't know, it's a side-thought. I suppose things "will pass". Looking for any tips &amp; folks who've gone through similar circumstances. Thanks. 