I kind of don't know where else to turn. This week has been the worst anxiety and trauma responses that I think I've ever experienced. I'm physically alone right now, and as a hypochondriac with a deep fear of sickness and needing help and not being able to get it, this is all a lot right now.

I had a medical emergency yesterday (bit by a dog), and had to go through the first of many rabies shots. I was already feeling overwhelmed and sick before this, recovering from a lingering illness. I know have a fever, maybe from the vaccine, maybe from covid/illness (my cough is maybe worsening??). Basically I'm trying all my might not to fall back on my unhelpful coping patterns of googling, seeking reassurance and resisting my own painful experience. But it just feels like so much.. I can't sleep and my mind keeps racing and wanting to go over all the uncertainties and risk that I feel like I'm facing.

I guess just needed a space to put this.. If there are any responses or solidarity, that would be an extra bonus. Thanks y'all 😢