This is my second post today, I hope this is allowed. Sorry to bombard everyone, guess I've just got a lot to say today.

I have had a turbulent "on off" relationship with my ex for 9 months. We have been no contact for about a week, and then last night I decided to contact his ex. 

I feel like my ex was emotionally abusive and I wanted validation and support. I thought I would get that from his ex because I just assumed she would have gone through similar things with him.

I sent her a no obligation to reply message, saying we dated the same person and I had a bad experience. I asked if maybe she had a bad experience and if she'd like to talk about it. No worries if not, but don't tell him that I messaged.

Well, she didn't respond to me and went straight to him.

So I got a message from him today to say he'd contacted a lawyer, police, had put cameras up at his house and would try and get a restraining order if I continued to harass him. I do feel like this was an overreaction considering I hadn't contacted him and to be honest, he hadn't blocked me so it's not like I'm going out of my way to contact him or anything.

So naturally things have blown up. I told him I would contact the police too as I have a tonne of screenshots of him lying and manipulating me. I told him I'm not interested at all in harassing him and I want this to be over with. I haven't been an angel. I've been threatening suicide for weeks and in the past I've been obsessive over his cheating and I've messaged other girls from his Instagram and stuff like that.

I don't know how to deal with this.

- I'm angry that his ex went straight to him. No girl code or compassion. 

- I'm angry that he still thinks he's a good person and I'm the bad one as I've suffered for months.

- I don't like that our relationship is ending on the worst terms possible and I think it will take years to come to peace with this.

- I'm sad that this is what I've come to. I'm an absolute mess.