A little background, my nieces and nephew don't believe that depression is a disease, they think it is an excuse for laziness.  Now my mom has recently developed pancreatic cancer,type 3 ATM, but cannot take anymore chemotherapy right now as it could kill her faster that the cancer. She needs 24 care and since she cannot afford private nursing and insurance is limited we are taking turns watching her and getting to her needs. I am doing my best helping out but they want more.  They want me to come earlier than I have been but it has been difficult getting sleep as I am having nightmares and also have a hydration problem. They are demanding more of my time and don't care about my welfare.  I have eaten at most half of what I usually eat .anxiety is going up. Hopefully I can make it to see a nurse practitioner on Tues.  I am almost tempted to check myself in for a mandatory 30 evaluation on my mental state.or at least go to convenient care. Those dark thoughts are there but I am fighting them off right now. 

Any suggestions on what to do . I am planning on trying to get a psychiatrist visit  to help with my next few steps I can do.

Any support is appreciated as I have very little in my family right now