I am never happy. 
Nothing is ever good enough. 
I really can't figure out why. 

I have a good life. I have 4 healthy kids. A man who loves me and who has stood by me for over 10 years through thick and thin.
Ive put him through a lot.
Why he is with me still? I will never understand. 
We have a roof over our heads. Are financially stable.
I have what alot of people would kill for. 

Yet im not happy.  I constantly want everything to change. I want to run away. 
I rarely smile or feel joy. 

What is wrong with me?
Why am I not grateful enough?
How do I change this?