The title says it all. It's 1:40 AM and I'm feeling anxiety now! What I really need is emotional support.

I basically have made some bad decisions that have truly came back around and bit me in the ass! I'm a 24 year old guy who is 3 months in a nursing program in which I'm doing well. Nursing school is the only thing that is truly going well for me besides my health. I have had a string of used cars and I currently got a used BMW from a family member. I did not know that I would have had this much of   
 heart ache. To put a long story short. These string of used cars are all-too unreliable and expensive to repair and inspect. Every single year I just keep putting off inspections because these cars won't stop failing and costing me money. It's sickening. And I've gone to SO many different places. When I was working full-time in 2019-2020 I REALLY should have ripped the band aid off and bought a new car. Just a plain old Toyota Corolla for reliability. But I didn't. I acquired another used car and it was not a good decision. 

The end of this is the fact that my bad decisions have really started coming back and biting me in the ass. I am 3 months in nursing school now and I STILL did not get a newer reliable car. I kept putting it off and putting it off and putting it off along with bad credit. Basically a string of used cars and very bad decisions is leaving this millennial in some late night anxiety and fear. My cheapskate parents always put fear in our heads that having a car loan sucks and we would never be able to afford it. I was always so afraid of getting one because I was afraid that something would go wrong. when things were better, I could have bought a new car with a much bigger down payment but instead bought yet another used car that did not last 1.5 years. I'm trying to apply for another car now and every time has been a decline. NOW, I'm working PRN so I could afford a reasonable payment but for god's sake if I just took care of it before nursing school things would have been so much better. 

I think so much about how much I wish I could go back to high school and just do every single thing differently. 

I wonder if I will be relieved if I just get a new car and get on with my life.