I’m training for a job I don’t like. In a company where my colleagues don’t care about me. I also assume that I will not pass the probationary period, because no one gives me the feeling to fit in or even to belong. I only started the training to meet the wishes of my mother and my friends. They all think that I can do it and that I am capable of doing it, but I don’t think that at all. Neither am I good enough to work nor do I have any motivation. In general, I have no motivation in life, nor do I have dreams or anything like that. I just live from one day to the next and think every day that it would be easier if I wasn’t there anymore. That’s why I’m thinking about leaving if I don’t pass the probationary period. Then I would just leave a few goodbye letters and my smartphone and just go away. With the thought in the back of my mind that I would probably die of frostbite or something like that after a few days. That way I could be carefree and my family and friends would never have to care for me again. I think that would be a win-win for everyone.