I was hospitalized a couple months back after a half hearted suicide attempt and for the 6 day stay got a $23,000 bill. Since then, medication along with therapy have added another couple thousand. I’m putting an immense strain on my parents, both of whom are retired, while they try to put me and my sister through college. Add that to the emotional burden I’ve put on my family, who have all been incredibly supportive. I’m ridden with guilt. I’ve got no will to do anything but curl up somewhere quiet, but feel like I have to put on happy face and act like I’m getting better. Guilt and emotional strain keep building and there doesn’t seem to be an end in sight. Plus I’m on the brink of flunking my classes and have got absolutely no hope for the future- I’m just dumb as fuck. It seems to be an inescapable spiral downwards, gradually bankrupting my family with the cost of ineffective treatment. I feel lost.