TW for mentions of suicide/sh

Wondering if anyone can give a few words of advice, because I’m struggling hard. Basically, as the title says, my job is making me extremely suicidal. I work in the animal care field as a veterinary assistant at very well known animal sanctuary. I thought this would be my dream job, but I am absolutely miserable. Long story short, it’s a very toxic place with very toxic management, low pay (below industry standard for vet assistants in my city) a terrible commute, among lots of other things. I’m usually good about sticking out jobs and have worked at most of my jobs for years but this place is affecting my mental health so bad that it’s making me miserable. I’ve lost weight from not eating due to stress and I’m only sleeping a few hours a day from stress induced insomnia. I’ve been lashing out severely at my partner who is only trying to help me and it kills me to be acting like this but I constantly feel like I’m on fight or flight mode 24/7.  I’m having panic attacks daily and actively self harming. My partner insists that he can support me financially until I can get back up on my feet, but I’m worried if I quit my job, I’ll lose any shred of normalcy and I’ll regress even further. I also won’t have health insurance, which I desperately need. I do have a bit of savings, but I’m scared to blow through it when it took years to save it all up. 

What would you guys do? I’m scared this is just my bpd ramping up, but even my neurotypical coworkers are miserable here. I’m also terrified to go back through looking for jobs again…I just feel like I’m a lost cause. I know I need to go back on medications and see a therapist, but it’s been so difficult finding one in my city since they are so backed up…literally any advice or insight would be helpful!