My boyfriend is diagnosed BPD and is in a really bad place right now. We’re arguing more often and he’s constantly getting upset because he’s so afraid I’m going to abandon him (I am the only woman in his life that hasn’t hurt him and I genuinely see a life with him and when he’s in the right state of mind he’s aware of this) He’s trying to earn a certification to get into his school program so he can further advance in the IT field and for a while he was studying and doing super well, and suddenly has lost all motivation to do anything remotely productive.

I just want to be there and support him through these hard times but I also know I can’t just sit here and let him wallow in self pity and hatred. He does better if he sees and feels like he’s making progress but I just don’t know how to help him. I’m pretty well versed in how to handle and help someone with BPD but when it comes to helping motivate him I’m at a loss. I love him so much and it kills me to see him like this. He has so much potential and I know he can do whatever he puts his mind to. It’s just a matter of putting his mind to it. 

What can I do to help him? 

