 

My name is Faris. I have been suffering from ruminating thoughts and anxiety attacks due to the stuff i read on r islam and muslim lounge and on muslim social media accounts on instagram, twitter(They say everything fun and natural is haram such as movies, video/board games, anime, modern art, media entertainment having non religious friends etc.). I got into an argument with my liberal muslim parents about this and don't want to vent with them no more about this. I couldn't focus this ramadan because of the issues I am suffereing from. I still suffer from these thoughts. I became so seriously addicted to reddit (islamic subreddits) for the past like 5 years or so dating back to 2018. I was also addicted to religious forums like [ummah.com](https://ummah.com/) and [islamqa.info](https://islamqa.info/) and they gave me anxiety. I wish I could become a normal person. I am 27 years old and will be 30 in 2024. The sooner I get out of OCD, the sooner I can get married. Conservative muslims say everything fun and natural is haram, even interacting with girls. I feel like leaving islam over those opinions. I like to cope by watching media, gaming videos, sports clips, movies, and other stuff. But I dont usually spend much time doing these things nowadays because of my addiction to reading stuff on reddit/social media about other muslims beliefs and behaviours. I am currently taking a course in Cybersecurity Analytics but cant really focus on the course because of my addiction to Reddit and social media. I usually frequent progressive\_islam because they are open-minded and I can relate to them. But progressive\_islam users are called deviants and terribly misguided by r islam users. I used to be on r islam back then but now its Extremely conservative saying most western entertainment is haram.

I currently work at a warehouse and need to get out of a minimum wage job.

I need some advice and some accountability partners( either moderate/liberal muslim or non-muslim).

Conservative muslims are not welcome to make comments or proselytize otherwise I ll get mad.