Hi all. I think I messed up today but so did my psych. I ran out of meds. Had an appointment with her today and told her so. She asked if I was okay, I told her I guess I was doing *okay*. She asked no follow up questions and ended the appointment with refills after that.

I should be fine now. When I have my meds I can handle myself okay. I'm just so angry. I've been hypomanic and she didn't pick up on it in our literal 2 min phone call and I didn't flat out tell her. I am angry at everyone and everything and I feel like I'm losing it. It feels like bugs are crawling under my skin. I'm okay in the sense that I can handle myself, but I feel very unwell. 

Im gonna try to wait it out until my meds are back in my system I just hate feeling this way and hate myself for it. Started getting some suicidal thoughts after my appointment because I was so angry, I didn't expect to have them but I did, and I hate myself for it. I just feel like such a failure at life and I'm uncomfortable and I want it to end. 

I'm looking for a new psych because this was the final straw for me personally, I need someone who at least pretends to care about me. I just hope the hypomania stops soon. I hope I didn't mess up too bad by not starting off the appointment by saying I'm hypomanic.