Okay, so I know that others come on here to vent during their struggles especially in those moments that it feels helpless. It always just really saddens me seeing people say they think bpd is a curse and they wont ever get better. Now, I have felt those ways before so I am not passing any judgement but I am also a firm believer that if you want things to get better you have to work for it. I am stuck in this limbo right now of waiting on getting into a DBT program and stuck with an uniformed therapist on bpd. Now me a few years ago would have thought this was pointless and this is "proof" that nothing will get better. I still am really struggling with those constant suicidal thoughts and outburts but I am finding those patterns where before I didn't. To get to this point of acceptance with little help has been hard but I have done my best with what I have. Bought several workbooks, watched Dr Fox videos on youtube, and communicated to my loved ones what things trigger me. Obviously I can not fully heal on my own but I do think there are things that we can do to help ourselves and staying stuck in that negative mindset only feeds in to this disorder. I am not sure if what I am saying makes sense but basically my point is that you have to work hard to get better and it sucks I understand, trust me  I understand, but it is not impossible. There is a reason that a therapy was created just for people with bpd. We can live happy and normal lives and yes it is different than those with out but that does not mean that is a bad thing. I just really get hurt seeing others share on here that they feel like it never ends. Challenge your own thoughts, educate yourself on what to do, and you will get  better.