Insecurities are killing me. All my school years, I was bullied and embarrassed by teachers and that ruined my personality and I hate a lot of things, including the possibility of my being a student again because I have speech blocks, I completely shut down if I'm in a classroom scenario. I'm trying to work on getting my higher studies (even if I have a number of other qualifications, it doesn't matter in this part of the world I live in, because a degree is what makes you a qualified individual), everything requires money and institutions  always run behind money. 

I feel trapped and stagnant, I'm unable to think ahead about my future because this 'lack-of-a-particular-qualification' makes me feel insecure, frustrated and I see no future without it. 

'Education is everyone's right' is not really a thing as only the ones who have money or the ones who are exceptionally intelligent are privileged enough to make it work.

I don't want to feel hopeless but I don't see any way out of this situation of mine.

I don't feel confident anymore and it hurts to be alone in this, unable to share my worries with anyone in reality.