I just need to vent.  I forgot to take my meds for a couple days while traveling and am feeling the emotional effects.  I've felt the build up for the last two days, knowing what was coming.  I've spent the morning crying, contemplating every aspect of life, praying to god that I'm not fucking my own child up, if it's worth it to stay with my husband when I'm like this.  This rollercoaster is draining.  I know it's bad to not take my meds... but the punishment of feeling like I'm being sent back to square one is deflating and heart breaking. It leaves  little motivation to keep moving forward. Like, whats the point. I'm scared shitless that my daughter is going to turn out just like me and I wouldn't wish that burden on anyone.  