I just despise everything about myself. I wish I didn’t exist. I’m an ugly pathetic embarrassment.
As soon as I confide in others about my feelings I immediately feel like a degenerate for oversharing and burdening them.
I just want to die but I don’t know how to do it painlessly. I don’t want to upset my family. 
If I isolated myself in this cramped little dorm room no one would even notice. I deserve it.