heavy trigger warning on this of course



I’ve had a lot going on in my personal life and I have felt a relapse bubbling under the surface for months now. Last night it all got a bit too much. I used a razor and I overdosed as well, I was having the most intrusive thoughts and I wanted it all to stop. It had been a over a year since I last cut myself so I’m very disappointed in myself. I even called the crisis team (I’m UK based) before I did anything and they were no help whatsoever. It’s fucked up, I have tried to do everything right but I’m still left with these awful feelings. Now I just feel nothing, in a dissociative state if you will. 


I’m just wondering what everyone does to unwind after they have a relapse? I would really appreciate some support right now and I’m not comfortable telling my friends and family