I hate this stupid disease. I feel like a psychopath. I feel like a fucking child. 

I just spent the last 3 1/2 hours heavily splitting my FP (trying equally as hard while it was happening to fight against it and be aware, but the parasite won) and being just royally pissed off and annoyed from work, then intensifying it when my FP wouldn’t give me undivided attention without me asking for it (cause he can totally read my mind while i’m also being a bitch to him, right??), just for my emotions to flip ON A DIME. I saw a neat home aquarium on TV and I was just overwhelmed with feelings of happiness and peace and just more than anything, wanting to buy an elaborate, ridiculous, fucking aquarium. 

I know I don’t actually have any desire for an aquarium or any aquatic animals for that matter. 

Yay for mental illness