i was feeling happier for a bit, but while at school a girl took a photo of someone a few feet away from me but clearly made sure to add me in the picture. i watched her do it.

i could be overthinking but it did shatter that small bit of happiness i had. i know i’m probably overreacting as i’m a senior in high school and know that not everything is about me. it’s the fact that she angled her phone so far over to get a got shot of me also is just humiliating as i know i’ve been having more difficult than normal days for the past few weeks. i know i’ve looked awful recently.

now i’m back to putting no effort in to anything even though i want to. i know i’ve looked terrible recently but i’ve been trying my best to clean up and put clean clothes on. school is nicer to be at because my parents aren’t there. i mean, i’ve been made fun of quite a lot and have heard threats directed at me, but it’s safer than my house.

i really don’t know what to feel anymore. i wish my dreams were longer or that i had more time to sleep. i have too much homework to do and i could fail a class soon. things have not been going great. every where i go i just feel even worse, even with the people i’m friends with.

getting that photo taken of me just really slapped me out of that semi-daydream about school being more inviting than my own home. i just want to lay in bed and stop going to school.

sorry for the rant…