I woke up this morning feeling completely empty inside. I haven’t felt it for awhile so I’m not doing too good. I remember this feeling and lately I have been depressed. But fuck this morning waking up hearing the birds chirping, the sun was out, it’s a beautiful day, all I wanted to do was close my eyes and not wake up. I wasn’t “depressed” just didn’t feel anything and feel numb. I can’t emphasize how much I hate this feeling. The first hour I just laid in bed. Now I’m up and crying because of how shitty this feels. But who I can explain i to? No one. If I talk about it I’m just full of myself and I bring everyone down. And I feel like it’s true. Fuck all this.