Hi,

So I got this new job recently as a tutor and you'd think that's a horrible job for someone with social anxiety but I actually have an easier time talking with students than I do with traditional co workers so this seems like it'd be perfect. Unfortunately I have been experiencing a very drastic mental decline about 5 weeks in.


I don't know it's a mix of imposter syndrome making me feel like I won't be able to teach the material, which I have run into situations where I don't know the answer to things, and a massive fear of losing the job due to just not being good enough. I already lost 2 clients and my boss had to meet with me about it so the client turnover is certainly not frequent so I kind of fucked up and I am so scared of doing it again.


If I lose this job, I don't know what's left for me. I can't do retail because the atmosphere and co-workers send me into a panic, and I can't do the jobs I want to do like software development or video editing because after 500 apps, no one wanted to hire me so apparently I suck at all of my skills.


I'm so scared I'm going to become lost in the world again, and every meeting with students terrifies me. I just need some kind reassuring words right now. The physical effects of this anxiety have been deteriorating my body and I don't know how much longer I can keep this up.

Thank you for reading this far.