So I'm not sure why I even want. Like I've been kinda isolating myslef from my collage mates for a few weeks/ months now and I also missed a 5day long trip, I was doing that couse I didn't have the energy for social interactions.

And now I'm kinda jealous when I see thier stories when they all hand out together, there where a few 'groups' I was kind of a part of but now I see them hanging out and not inviting me. 

I kinda deserve it since I didn't put enough effort to entertain them lately but it still makes me kinda sad :/

Also I'm in a pretty demanding course so last semester I had a good social life and bad school results but this semester it's the opposite, it's hard to find balance between them, and I'm not sure if I even wanna go and drink anymore. Like it's not realy fun, and most of the stuff my friends(?) do when they meet up is drink. So I'm not even sure if I wanna meet up with them, but I'm still lonely.

Idealy I should probably find ppl who would enjoy spending time with me on stuff that's not parting, that's a plan actualy 

Ok sorry that was a chaotic rant but it helped me clear my head