Short as possible. I had a friend whom I worked closely with. We got close. One day my friend was acting strange so I tried everything under the sun to cheer them up. 

By this time I had deep feelings for them, no longer friend feelings. I'm not sure but the feeling could have been mutual as far as I am concern.

I couldn't do anything to cheer them and i think they suffer from bpd as well. I eventually asked the question " do you want me to leave you alone" which my friend responded YES. 

I blocked them from messaging me and cut them off right then and there.  It didn't stop there because we saa each other person after and it's been total anarchy since.

This person claims they want me better and claims they wanna be with me but never show it. I started drinking to alleviate the stress with this relationship.

My instincts we're to run. Cut them off. Protect myself. This person keeps saying they won't give up but it already feels like it. It feels like they're secretly detaching from me. I'm attached and I want to detach. 

Drinking numbs the pain but i'm sure this is a bad idea since i already suffer with addiction.