Ive come to realize i only love the idea of doing things, of making things, of going places, but all i really want to do is sleep or watch people live the adventures and the lives i dream of on youtube or on pictures or movies or books or tv shows etc.

I’m so pathetic and im wasting this good life i have, i wish somebody else more deserving could have my place and actually do something with it.
I’m afraid and stressed out and depressed and everytime i do anything i get this feeling that im watching myself in a play or that nothing makes sense and everything is ridiculous and why am i even doing this? so i don’t do anything because i feel like the world is better off having minimal contact with me, but i cant keep to myself i need help sorry for this word vomit i’m just so tired and i can’t find a point to anything