Hey guys,

(Sorry if this comes out in a bit of a rambling and long fashion, my brain doesn't seem too with it at the moment...also sorry for the wall of text.)

I found out the other month that I have BPD, and am trying to take steps to manage stuff better and have started seeing a psychiatrist recently on a one to one basis.  He had been talking to me about starting me on a low dose of Quetiapine, and wanted me to get my blood taken and looked at to make sure it's ok.  

I only just had my blood taken this morning, and then had an appointment with a GP afterwards.  I spoke to the GP about how I thought it was a long time to wait until my next appointment with the Psychiatrist to get started on the medication (next appointment isn't until 21st December) and how I am finding things very difficult at the moment (I have a lot of stuff going on right now, including having to move out by January).  I said I wasn't really aware of what the procedure is, or what I'm supposed to be doing other than trying to "keep going" every day, and that I was finding stuff really hard as I have no set routine with seeing the shrink or a doctor or anything, and have no idea what's going on.

The GP told me that the psychiatrist wants me to start on the Quetiapine pretty much straight away (shrink guy never told me this).  I was told by the psychiatrist that I would only be taking very low doses of this med, at 25mg a day.  

The GP has just told me that I will be taking 25mg on the first day, 50mg on the second day, 100mg on the third day, and 150mg on day 4 - this is obviously surprising to me, because of what the psychiatrist had said.  I mentioned this to the GP, and she said that people change their minds, and he must have thought this was better for me.

So I guess I'm asking you guys, what are your experiences of this?  Have any of you started meds in this way?  I have not had anything like this before, so I'm pretty anxious and frightened about it.  The last med I tried was Mirtazipine... which kinda had me hearing voices and tripping out really badly, and I only took that for a couple of days then stopped.  I think that's probably what's making me nervous about the Quetiapine, even tho they're different types of drug.  I guess it's kinda normal to be apprehensive tho.  But please do let me know what you've found with this medicine.

Also what has everyone else's experience been of finding out about the BPD diagnosis?  I kinda feel like I'm in limbo at the moment with it, and don't really know how to take it... 

As a bit of explaining for background info - I have been out of work for nearly 3 years now :( I've had counselling before, and was also part of a Therapeutic Community for 10 months for 3 and a half days a week (didn't have to stay there overnight, I got to go home), but things have gotten much worse since I left the TC in March this year.  I currently live alone as sharing makes me more anxious and aggressive, but I have just found out that I have under two months to move out and find somewhere else to live.  I also am currently on crutches and have been for the past month as I managed to rupture the tendons in my knee and bugger my hamstrings again.

Any help or comments kindly appreciated :)
Apologies again for giant wall of text.  Feel free to ask any questions if you need to.