My mum died on September 24th and the last I saw of her was me turning up at her door with a knife on September 10th and the night she died I was messaging someone she knows making severe death threats to my mum who called the cops to her home finding her dead (I got suspected of murder but released from prison 2 weeks later) I was terrible to my mum but she gets on everyones nerves and I just couldn't stand it as she messed alot of things up but also meant for the best.

January 13th my best ever mate and only current mate died in my arms and she has been VERY ill since January 1. She was 28 and had a 5 year old son who she only trusted me with (apart from family) and I as the only person she let in her home (she didn't even let family in her home)

I met her in January 2021 and she was my first friend in 10 years as I isolated myself playing games all day to forget about the past and thinking I'm a no-hoper that won't get anywhere in life due to a messed up childhood and losing contact with all my friends.

It's been 16 hours sine my special mate (neighbor) died and I'm still just sitting here and not slept. My mum and neighbor were all I had for a lifetime regardless of situation and now there gone.

Love you both.