All my life I've been told to "man up", to "stop being scared of every little thing", to "just be confident", i feel so defective as a human being.

I'm told so many times that there's people with much worse problems doing better than me and i don't even know what true suffering is, people tell me how there's so many kids in the world that don't even have food to eat and this makes me hate myself and my problems even more, it's like I dont even get any sympathy for my problems, no one understands except these little forums on reddit, the outside world is a lot different.
I've done everything these I was told to do, nothing worked, no one realises how difficult it is for me to do the most petty, trivial and small things, i have 0 people to vent and who understand, it was for me to even write this post, i have hundreds of thoughts in my mind but none of them come out when i try to type or speak them out. Life's game is in extreme difficulty mode.