My cousins threw a small get together with the other cousins at her place for Mew Years and I blew it. I couldn't socialize or mingle well with the others. I just wanted to leave and felt awake the whole time. 

I thought I had grown a little in terms of socializing but I just realized I still suck. We played some games that I didn't do so well in either. It's like I forget how to be myself when I'm around a group of people.

Wish I was a social butterfly that people enjoyed being around. Feel like I dampened the mood. Can't stop thinking about it. How do I stop being socially awkward?