I sometimes get into these manic anxiety attacks that last for hours when I am alone. Usually I am very irritable a few days before and after.

This happened yesterday and I get this dizziness and pressure in my ears while feeling severe paranoia. I usually soothe myself by rubbing my forearms, pacing and even rocking my body back in forth (similar to self stimulation for autistic individuals).

I also when I get really mad and dizzy sometimes just want to bang my head on something, just to get out of my own thoughts. I don't usually do this because I know it's irrational but I have known to punch walls and hit my own head against things or punch my own head/face in the past. I almost feel like I want to yell for help but that's such a low thing to do but doing these things for attention but I don't know.

These episodes have been happening a lot more often during covid since I am alone sometimes for the whole day. Last time I had some weed to calm down and that really helped but I don't know if it's a good idea to abuse it like that. 

Like I said, I know I need to see someone. My insurance changed on Jan 1st and I get alot better options then so I have been pushing things off but this has been affecting my relationships because I've been being a real dick the past few days with snide comments and such but I feel such a malaise and I'm so irritated with everything.

I have considered maybe a therapy dog may help since pressure and not being alone really helps these things with me.

Can someone offer their experience with something similar and maybe what they think this could be?

Thank you for reading.