lately all I think about is death and dying. I so badly want to believe in an afterlife or reincarnation but it seems to good to be true. I feel like nothing matters, I don’t care about anything. I cant really feel my emotions. I have no motivation. 24/7 I think about how pointless life is and how i’ll never do anything. even if I stop thinking about it, it comes right back because it’s gonna happen one day. I keep trying to imagine what’s it’s like and how it will happen. my thoughts are constantly running. I cant focus on anything because it’s all I think about. I’m never happy and nothing excites me. things I used to love I don’t care about. I never feel safe or relaxed. most of the time nothing feels real. I feel like I don’t even know who I am. It feels like i’m not in my body. every day feels the same. I feel so unhappy I can’t even fake being happy. I have no one to talk to about anything. is this really all life has to offer me? this is all that life is? I feel dead inside.