I should’ve killed myself this time last year when I cut myself. I wish I did. I’ve spent this entire year in pain, not accomplishing anything. I’m reminded of what a failure I am everyday. I lost the education I had, the girl of my dreams, the body I had at peak fitness. I have nothing now. I’m so angry at myself for not just giving in then, before I lost it all. I could’ve died happy. I don’t understand how anyone continues their life at this point? There is no up, there is no happiness. I’m destined to always be in pain and no one seems to care. I’m just so furious with myself I didn’t end it last year. I’m so sorry I didn’t.