Im a 19 year old male about to start college soon.. To start things off ill begin where everything im going through started. About a few months ago i was getting headaches out of the blue. Just randomly i started getting headaches everyday, and for a while I ignored them. The only problem is they didnt go away and I started to get nervous. Originally I thought they were just me going crazy but my head really hurt no matter what i did. Ireally thought I was going to die and I was nervous 24/7. Eventually I just said fuck it i dont care what happens to me and they mostly went away. Somtime during all this too I choked on my food a few times, which caused me to be nervous every time I ate. Anyways I got panic attacks from all this, it was horrible since this lasted months. Somewhat recently i got rid of the panic attacks by assuring myself im not going to die and im going to be fine. So by this point in time im feeling a lot better, but it didn't last long. I began to feel what I think was depersonalization/dissociation.  Basically I felt like i didn't exist, that I wasn't in control of myself, like i wasn't me/forgot who I was, and like i was going crazy. I was fighting this feeling for a while, I did my best, but i lost. What made it worse was in class we were discussing weird shit like existence and stuff like that. I knew already that this was going to make stuff worse but I had to listen and do my homework since I wanted to graduate. Anyways the teacher brought up some stuff that freaked me out. Stuff like how do we know we actually exist, life could be a simulation, why do we do what we do,  that we aren't really in control of ourselves, and why are we us? And also said things like are we really in control of our thoughts, are we just our brains. Now I know this stuff sounds crazy but it scared me because it somehow made sense in a weird way. Usually when people said stuff like that to me before I was like no way I dont believe that garbage, but keep in mind I felt shitty already and not like myself so it really impacted me. I tried to ignore it bit it began to bother me every day on top of my feelings of depersonalization. The past week its been getting worse like i actually feel like I don't exist and that I'm not in control of myself. Like I'm actually starting to believe that garbage. Its scary and its really horrible. I try to ignore it and these thoughts but no matter what they keep bothering me. Sorry for the long paragraph but just some background on what started all this. I really don't care whether I'm real or fake, I just love my family and friends and I dont want to end up in a mental hospital; i just want to feel like my old self and actually enjoy life again. If I heard this a few years ago I'd be like nah I don't believe all that conspiracy garbage. Thanks for reading, any help or advice is appreciated!