I am currently a college senior and the idea of being a college senior petrifies me. All my life my identity has been being a student and its scary to know that in a couple of months, this will all be gone. Plus, my college years were very turbulent. I was actually supposed to graduate back in May 2021, but because of my OCD I had to take a medical leave and now I'm graduating in 2022. I just feel like I really fucked up my college years and I am still fucking them up because I am so socially anxious and just overall an anxious wreck. I think that I also may be autistic, but like I don't know. I used to see a therapist, but he was a complete asshole so Im never ever going back to see them. But then the whole process of finding a therapist and going through another intake is just so draining. But Im an anxious wreck- like I start an internship tomorrow, and I am just so terrified. I don't think I made a very wise decision having an internship during the school year, but it is what it is. I was thinking of potentially going back to my old therapist, but it seems as though she primarily specializes in children/adolescents even though her website says she treats young adults+ adults too. I just think it would be a little awkward to reach out....I don't know...I just know that I need to talk to someone because the path that I am going down I don't really think will end well.