I don't think this breaks any rules but if it does please let me know.

For background, I (22M) am a college Mathematics student, currently in my 5th year. My degree is 4 years long, but almost no one finishes it in that time due to its difficulty (for example, there were about 80 people who started 1st grade with me, but only 5 finished in 4th grade). 

I'm doing basically all of my 3rd grade courses this year, because I failed them all the first time. I also went away for Erasmus last year, where I took some 3rd grade courses again and some 4th grade ones, all of which I failed too. 

My colleagues are all ahead of me, I'm really behind. If I pass everything I maybe have a chance to finish in my 6th year. I try to not let this discourage me because I love this degree and I see my future as a Mathematics teacher and or researcher. But I get really anxious in my class all of which is 2 years younger than me, and are already more advanced than me. 

My anxiety gets really bad when I try to study, I don't have a studying habit and it's really difficult for me. I also have no friends in my class to discuss or study together, which is really important in this degree.

What I want to say is, I'm trying. I often put myself down because of how behind I am and how old I'm getting in this time, but I try to reassure myself that I'm doing my absolute best and I should be proud.

My girlfriend who is a saint tries to encourage me too but I have no validation or acknowledging from people who actually know exactly how difficult and demanding this is (e.g. classmates), or any other external sources.

I should be proud and keep doing my best right? I feel stupid for asking validation from strangers but I could really use the boost right now.

Thank you for reading and for any responses in advance.