Oddly enough I don’t feel a heaviness of depression in me, I just reached a point where I truly could not care about anything anymore. I’ve analyzed my life, and realized the relationships and passions I embrace aren’t enough for me to embrace life anymore. I don’t feel sad, depressed, happy, jealous, I just lack a feeling of anything. I cry, but the tears don’t correlate with anything apart from emptiness. I wish these tears had a reason to cause them, but it’s just the lack of everything that makes them. I want to say I tried, but truth is, I don’t care anymore to try. And even when I do, my heart is always telling me it’s hopeless in the end. I’m not sure when I’ll be ready, but I do have a plan in place for when the day comes. The only reason I see a purpose in this moment is to help my grandma, but when she passes I know I can too without guilt.