So one of my biggest "triggers" is when I'm texting someone and they either don't respond the way I was expecting them to or that I want them to or when they dont respond at all for long periods of time when I know they saw the message. Even if it's just a causal conversation, I feel very hurt and get very emotional over it. I start spiraling and it's just a domino effect. Typically, I will message the person back and start obsessively apologizing for "bothering them" or say something like "nevermind that was so stupid dont respond, I'm sorry for being dumb. I'm sorry for annoying you, I can leave you alone if you want." SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY DIDNT MESSAGE BACK QUICK ENOUGH OR NOT TO MY EXPECTATION wtf is wrong with me. I know I sound very dumb, but this is my reality.

Anyway, I was doing pretty good for a few days and working on acceptance instead of just immediately acting on my feelings. But I did it again this morning. Last night I responded to a text from my FP (of course) and I also sent him a meme. Today I wake up with no response and my heart literally dropped and I had that sinking feeling. I immediately wrote him another text saying, "sorry if I offended you I hope you're not mad."

?????????? I literally sent him a fucking funny meme that no one would find offensive! Why did I fucking jump to that conclusion??

Anyway, it's been a few hours and I feel a lot of shame. I've been feeling really good the last few days in terms of accepting emotions instead of acting on them, and today I screwed it up. I know things like this will happen and I will never be perfect. But does anyone have any tips on how to stop obsessing over messing up and "relapsing" back to unhealthy behavior? I use the word relapse pretty loosely for the lack of a better word.

I know this sounds so fucking stupid and trivial, but its something I really wanna work on.

TL,DR: after a few days of practicing acceptance for one of my main triggers, I acted on my emotions and I feel ashamed. Any tips on accepting my slip up instead of obsessing over it and feeling like I ruined any progress made?

Thank you 💕