My therapist and first psychiatrist say I have bipolar 2 while my second psych says I have high-functioning autism instead. I believed my second psych because I wanted to quit my bipolar meds (quetiapine). I was so convinced I didn’t have bipolar that I was blindsided by a mood swing. 

My mood swing caused me to HATE my pet dog. I have always disliked it but I had a BURNING hatred at that time. I hate it so much I complained to my parents for 1 whole hour at late night. I hate my pet dog so much I wanted to give it up at an animal shelter, give it away to family, remove its organs, eat it, watch it get hit by a car, sprinkle salt in its water bowl and feed it chocolate (all in that order). I hated it so much I plotted to “remove” it. I feel a little regret about plotting its disposal because that could get me in trouble. Fortunately it only lasted 1 night (and counting).

While contemplating about my sudden, vicious hatred; I remembered that the exact same thing happened last month, but with Christians. I have been persecuted by them, so it made sense. I ranted about them for 1 week, unlike my 1 night mood swing. In August, I hated eating food because it wastes time and it’s beneath me. I hate eating food so much, I ranted about it for 1 week. And back then in February, I hated cars and had a desire to destroy every car on the street because I have realised how ugly and polluting car-centered cities are. Did you know that car-centered cities are linked to obesity?

Does anyone have this experience or is it just me? Is it a bipolar thing? If it’s a bipolar thing, my second psychiatrist is absolutely wrong about me.