Literally any strong emotion makes me cry but ESPECIALLY when I’m anxious about having a conversation I just turn into an absolute crybaby. I still live with my parents and any conversation I have with them about something important makes me just start to sob because I’m worried they’ll be upset with me for whatever reason. Aside from a few conversations those fears are completely unfounded but no matter how many breathing exercises I do, rationalizations I try to make and scripting what I’m going to say I just end up crying. And THEN, when the conversation goes well, I end up worrying if whoever I just talked to thinks I was doing it on purpose to manipulate them, and I convince myself I’m being manipulative by crying. Which makes me cry more. 

Anxiety has taken so much of my life from me and it just sucks. I just wish I could get ahold of myself and stop with the waterworks!!! I’m tired of it!!! I’m an adult dammit!!