this has been consuming me lately. i have a nice group of friends we’re not the closest but we’re pretty close. one of the friends is really nice, their birth chart is very similar to mine (because that matters to me) and i think we’re alike in a lot of ways. i dont think they have bpd but definitely have anxiety and an ed (so do i). 
they’re a good friend, reliable and sweet and a good person, however, they are very… self centered? im not sure if thats the right word but ill go with it for now. 
they will talk about themselves a lot, whats going on in their life, issues etc, and they’ll ask me about my life but… we never seem to spend the same amount of time talking about things i want to talk about?? they’ll find a way to route the conversation back to what they were saying or to a different topic that relates to them. 
at first i used to just roll with it, like if they want to talk about themselves during the whole dinner then we could do that, i get in moods like that sometimes where i just go off so i understand. recently tho, i decided that because i DONT know how to confront them about this i would just try to do the same thing they do (probably not the healthiest but its the best i can do rn). this means that if they interrupt me to talk about something unrelated to the conversation, i dont stop talking and let them talk, i continue the conversation as they talk over me. i did this today and it was a little awkward. we were trying out clothes in dressing rooms and i was talking about some pieces i didnt like, they interrupted me to talk about what they were trying on and i just didnt stop talking. we both finished our sentences and i purposely didnt say anything to see if they would at least acknowledge what i was saying. they didnt, we were in silence for a few seconds then changed the subject.

things like this trigger me because i’m very worried about being the person that only talks about themself(aka being scared of coming across lke my mom comes across to me). i feel like because of that i attract people that have a hard time having a two-way connection with me?? they’ll tell me all about their life and expect me to ask them questions and i never get asked anything. ill either feel angry and resentful over friends like that or ill feel like its not that bad and i can just deal with it. 

this same friend recently made comments about their weight/legs around me and other friends, they are very petite and the smallest of the friend group. our friend group struggles with body image and it felt so rude to say that around all of us while you have a flat stomach and a thigh gap? theyre entitles to their insecurities and i understand body dysmorphia but read the room and stop triggering all your friends because you want to be validated as skinny (i dont have an issue with them wanting validation, it just triggered all of us brought the mood down).

im reaching a point where im so annoyed at them that i catch myself being so cold and insensitive towards them. i know a lot of these things stem from their traumas (which they are prone to trauma dump unexpectedly) and dont think they make them a bad person but… its exhausting at times. 

i dont know how to approach this conversation with them without having a meltdown or just straight up roasting them for the way they act (a lot of my emotions are presented as anger). any advice on how to bring this up compassionately but also not backing down?