I'm having some very strong, serious feelings from cognitive dissonance. I broke up with a man who was also my fp about 3 weeks ago. It's all my strength to not contact him. We were not compatible. I go back &amp; fourth between demonizing him as just a random tinder stranger who got lucky, and idolizing him as a deeply valued partner (now ex partner) who sincerely loved me. Demonizing him makes it possible for me to abstain from contacting him. But it also feeds the notion that he did not love me,which hurts &amp; I kno isn't true. But then, I'll experience a flash of a memory in which evidence is provided that he did love me. The descrepancy between the two feelings is irreconcilable. He cannot be both a demon who never cared about me, as well as an angel who loved me and the uncomfortable feeling of both coexisting in my brain is pretty intense right now. Does anyone relate? How do you deal?