So I’m 20, I was abused by my mother as a child which I think this stems from, as well as early exposure to porn. 

I send money to women online, in return they will basically abuse me, and often demand more money from me. I enjoy this as a kink but it’s gotten out of control. Now I can’t stop doing it and it’s literally ruining my life. I’ve spent thousands already and it’s like an addiction for me. Try to think of it as gambling addiction, or similar. Even though I choose to do this, I think it should be made illegal because there are many guys out there like me. They will encourage you to “relapse” if you quit, and pull you back in. 

It has caused me depression and anxiety 

Reddit is the only place I feel I can come to this about and open up. I need serious help or advice on how to quit, please.