In February, I was diagnosed with bpd, anxiety, and depression, I ended up in therapy after a painful relationship with my ex ended, and a lot of my toxic behaviour was brought to light for me.

Since starting therapy, and finding a therapist I could tolerate long enough to keep, we ended our sessions as she was leaving the practice for mat leave, she tried to transfer me to someone else but I didn't like it so I stopped attending altogether.

Right now I feel like I'm in a deep pit, I'm always anxious, I'm always tired, I always have an impending sense of doom, I always feel spacey and out of it, I keep reminding myself its just anxiety, I'm not dying, I'm not having a heart attack or stroke or aneurysm or anything else, but I just can't shake my anxious feelings, the feeling like I'm gonna faint, the feeling like im gonna throw up, the tremoring, the panic, its daily, and its pervasive, and I don't know how much more I can take.

I don't really know what to do anymore, I need help, I can barely function, my family doctor is useless to me, she stopped helping me when I came out as trans a few years ago, only referring me to my endocrinologist, my endo is great, but I see him too rarely and I feel he's too specialized to help me with this. What's left? Find a new doctor? I've tried, and can't find a trans-friendly mental health aware doctor. New therapist? I could barely afford therapy before, let alone now.

Serious suggestions on what I should do, I need help and I'm out of ideas on how to get it.