
Hi, I’m new to the sub but I’ve had anxiety since I was a young teenager, and before that I was an anxious person (notable but not to the level of a disorder). I have GAD, OCD, depression, agoraphobia, and disordered eating (I won’t talk much about this as I don’t want to trigger anyone). I was in therapy for five years but stopped at the end of 2019. I am medicated with Prozac and Klonopin.

I’m a college student, off for break. But my life started to change around Thanksgiving. These have been my major stressors since:

•My dog passed away. I was very close to him and loved him deeply, maybe more than I loved anything else in this world. He was there through all the hardships so far, and I guess I considered home to be wherever he was. It feels like part of my heart is missing now.
•The next day, my best friend attempted to take his life. He is home now, recovering.
•Water damage is forcing me to move apartments. I tend to get very comfortable in one place and I dislike change.
•I learned that my boyfriend of almost two years has alters, similar to DID but I can’t make that diagnosis. He is disabled, and has a controlling mother who despises the idea of taking him to a counselor.
•I learned my friend also has alters.
•My eating patterns have led to health issues, particularly vertigo.
•Panic attacks occur out of nowhere now.
•I can’t sleep as I usually do, my body aches constantly.
•My skin is breaking out and I’m losing my hair (I know that sounds vain but I have always valued my long, thick hair and clear skin).

I feel like I’m going crazy sometimes. That this is all a bad dream, and maybe I’ll finally wake up sometime. But I know I have to keep going forward. 

This is not the full story, but I hope someone out there can hear me. At the moment I feel lost.