I want to preface this post that I am blessed to have options and I know this is a first world problem. I don’t feel like I can talk to my friends about this because some of them are older than me without a partner yet and they want kids and are upset about it. 
I am 32 and I’ve been a speech pathologist since I was 24. I work in the schools and with the pandemic and schools I’m so so tired of my job. I love the kids but this past year was really a lot. I’m tired of this pressure to fix people’s children. I’m tired of trying to convince teachers to use strategies and it doesn’t happen. I just don’t feel this is where I belong. I’m very lucky that I got a large amount of my student loans forgiven from my masters degree in speech therapy. I didn’t pick speech therapy out of a huge calling. My mom pushed me in that direction because of job security. I’ve tried other settings and I just don’t feel it’s the right fit career wise. I got engaged right before the pandemic and we plan to get married summer 2022. So I am lucky to have my partner if I want to start planning for kids together. He has told me he is happy with whatever happens (very grateful for his mindset). Right now I want to get out of my career and into a new one but I am feeling this dilemma with the timing of being 32 and told by doctors to get on it with having a baby. I had a procedure in may for polyps so that gave me a scare. Now the doctor keeps saying I shouldn’t wait til 35 to have a baby. I got accepted into a master of social work program that will be 3 years long. If I proceed I will be 35 when I get out. I have anxiety about student loans and starting over but I really can’t see myself in speech therapy for 30 more years. I’m also afraid that if I start my program now and have kids in a few years I won’t be able to get pregnant as all these doctors won’t stop drilling this idea that I magically have my eggs dry up at 35. The doctors won’t affirm that my family history of older maternal age is a good sign. My grandmother had my mom and aunt in the 1950’s at age 38 and 40. They were both healthy. My mom had me at 35 and my sister at 38. All naturally. My mom did have endometriosis and once they did surgery she got pregnant. They won’t diagnose if I have that yet. I have anxiety and depression, I had a life altering trauma 5 years ago. So anxiety is definitely making me go crazy over this. Anyways this post is getting long I’m just feeling like I’m putting myself through indecision hell with this issue and I wanted perspectives from others.