I feel so conflicted being in the middle of narcissism and impostor syndrome. I have low self-efficacy, so I become defensive to prove myself most of the time. And in being defensive, I caught myself sometimes thinking that I'm better than others (where I become narcissistic?). It's just that when things go right, it hushes my anxiety and, temporarily, boosts my low self-efficacy. Is it just me?

I just want to improve my self-confidence in the healthiest way, and without discounting the positive. Any advice?