Most of the time I feel okay. But I can't focus long on what makes me feel great. Yet if I think of something that makes me a bit anxious I fall deeper and deeper into what makes me feel bad. I know this is common. But these small things can end up being my mood for the rest of the day. Like discovering a small lump and thinking it could be anything. Even if I am 99% sure what it is I may think it's cancer or it is there thanks to my lifestyle.

After I think I've finally had a relaxing time with someone, I start to think about why he/she didn't smile during one situation. Or if everything was perfect I start to worry about their health. Thinking about how I am gonna handle situations if things go wrong with them. Even meeting therapists I feel as if I obsess way too much over what they may think is wrong with me. I also worry that they may think that I am over exaggerating. But when I meet them I try to be 100% honest and natural. But if they don't seem happy when we say goodbye I will of course think about it for a bit afterwards. I don't even worry about them being unhappy over me. I just get stuck with the image of people being unhappy.

If something positive happens then I may get into a great mood. But it's so easy for me to ruin it all by thinking about something negative. When an actual stressfull situations happen I eventually feel very optimistic afterwards and can even struggle to be affected by negative thoughts. But if I am not put under pressure in a long time it's like all the negative energy builds up again.

What should I do? I know this is pretty normal. But I feel as if maybe it shouldn't feel this hard to find things comforting when I do get into a negative spiral.