I never have.   (((***EDIT: Thanks to some of the comments, I've realized that I mean RESIDENTIAL TREATMENT, not inpatient.***)))

I'm currently in an outpatient programme, but they now are urging me to go to residential. I think this is from suicidality, self harm, low group participation, and when I do participate more in group I end up having panic attacks and spiralling. 

I agree with them that this would be most helpful for me. I've ended up in the psych ward so much, and it only holds me until they think I'm ok enough. It doesn't treat the underlying issues. I don't know what my underlying issues are! 

My treatment team thinks I have been historically undertreated for my mental illnesses. Some people in my group therapy have joined after doing residential, and they seem to be fading well. I think this is something I really need, even though I'm terrified. But I'm also terrified of dying, terrified I'll give in again, terrified of my mind. 

So I am wondering what your residential experience was like. Was it dbt based? Psychodynamic? Were you allowed to use the Internet / cell phone etc? How long were you there for? What was it like? Did you find it helpful? It would be so helpful for me to read your experiences. 

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EDIT: I realized that I mean residential treatment, not inpatient.
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