So I went to a doctor awhile back because I feel like I’ve been feeling fairly depressed and suffering from anxiety for at least two years. I basically told what I’d been going through, that my depression comes in “waves.” Either every other week or every few days. And I told him that sometimes I’ll have moments where out of nowhere I’ll feel euphoric and I think yeah everything’s gonna be alright but that feeling usually fades I go back to feeling however I was feeling either that or pretty low.

And I won’t go into too much detail but these past few years have sucked. Aside from Covid I’ve just had some real bad luck and can’t seem to catch a break.

As far as my anxiety I told him that I bite my nails, I chew the inside of my lip to a point where it sometimes bleeds and I’ve had panic attacks as well as having moments where I’m laying in bed or on the couch and feel paralyzed because of my anxiety, my chest tightens and I’m too afraid to move but feel guilty doing nothing, which can make my anxiety worse. 

Anyways I’m mainly making this post because I kind of disagree with the doctor but I’m also disappointed in the process. Before I went I had to fill out ten or so simple questions about my anxiety and depression. When I got there I had to fill out basically the same questions then I went over the questions with the doctor’s assistant or someone and then I went over the questions again with the doctor. Anytime I tried to go a little more in-depth in my answer they didn’t seem to listen and were too focused on the next question and getting through them. 

After I left I felt somewhat better but in the follow days I felt like I’d been tricked by both myself and the doctor. I know it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get a second opinion but it took a lot out of me to acknowledge what I’d been going through and to go to the doctor to deal with it and I just felt so discouraged afterwards because I felt maybe I hadn’t expressed myself well enough, because I think my anxiety is more than just mild.