My head hurts—I think it’s from all my hair picking or is it hair pinching? You know the mind affects the body and the body effects the mine. I don’t belief in the soul. As far as I know, most people don’t have souls. I don’t think I do. Feeling tired now, the winds is soft and cool; the noise of the city grumbles outside my window; the sky grows darkish. My friend bothers the shit out of me. Can’t he understand I don’t want to fucking play board games all the time. Can’t he get that through his head? My writing is erratic today. I think I’m truly freaking out, and maybe this is a good thing. I’m breaking free from irrationality in a rational world, bringing me to rationality in a irrational world. God, people are stupid! But I’m just as stupid for believing they aren’t stupid in the first place like the guy who brings as feral cat believing it won’t scratch his eyes out if he tries to cuddle with it. I’m cuddling with people and getting my eyes scratched out because I don’t get people and I’m constantly nervous around them. I ate half a bowl of olives and really should call my mom, yet my tongue is too salty. My tongue is like a red toad. I went to a new friends house on Saturday and fucking embarrassed myself. My red toad of a tongue and meatloaf sandwich of a brain went off saying stupid shit like pronouncing library like lie-berries. I lie-berry to people a lot because I’m unconfident and uncomfortable with my own experience. I think I get off on lying though, my dick getting hard like an exclamation mark while exaggerating. I wonder if I lie to myself when I say the word lie-berry. I think I’m a smart guy, but maybe I’m not. I like to read books but maybe I’m not reading them. I’m feeding them to my ego that tells me I am smart, I am great, I deserve fame, recognition, unbinding glory. At least there was guy stupider than me at my best friends. He was from Buffalo and seemed slightly like one of those anti-Semitic lacrosse players—dad cap, nipples protruding from his blue shirt, no chin, and smug-mother-fucking grin. I disliked immediately as I walked in. I think everyone did because he never would shut up. I hate people who don’t shut up. I wanted to shove a lacrosse stick down his throat. No, no that’s not right. I’m sure he another depressed schmuck like me. Maybe we have to look out for each other. Everyone in the world needs to look out for each other, although before I do that I need to look out for me.