I constantly feel as though i am not enough. I was working as a teacher and i never felt i was good enough. It was never my first choice so i quit. Now i'm trying to go to art school and i feel like my work is just not good. I get gigs thanks my teacher. He likes my work but i find it awful. I tell myself to keep doing my best but it crushes my soul when i know i could do better.

I always expect better from myself because i know i could do better if i worked harder, if i spent more time on it earlier, if i worked hard earlier instead if lying around. I always feel so guilty for not working hard enough.

I can't feel motivated to study, too. I try to better my art by practicing more. It is really hard to keep myself motivated and focused. 

Also, i punish myself way too hard at the smallest mistake. If i am not immediately good at something i feel like i am the worst and i should quit. 

I literally just thought of quitting just because next gig seemed hard. I feel so ashamed for giving up so easily.

I dont feel i belong anywhere. I thought i would fit in an art job but i feel bad still. What is wrong with me? Why can't i just be happy and content?