I’ve always been scared of meds. Although I have a bipolar disorder, my mother is a nurse and ironically recommended I do not take any medication for any mental issues for any reason. She sees how people have to depend on it their whole lives and how easily people slip and relapse when they don’t have it. 

I only feel my bipolar has gotten worse, I find myself becoming more stuck and it gets frustrating. This person I am becoming, allowing myself to be upset about the smallest things… it’s not who I am. When I go back to think about why I am angry about something, I really cannot think of a reason. 

For the first time I threw something across the room because I was irritated, and it broke. This may not seem out of the ordinary but I wouldn’t describe this as something that I would come near to doing. I’m not a bad person and for the most part stay reserved towards myself. I just don’t understand why it’s getting worse and what I should do.