Today I went to my psychologist. It was the first consult with her after my diagnosis, but I'm her patient since August/2016. 
When I told her about the BPD, she told me that I would not get better.
That destroyed me inside.
After the consult, I cut myself. 
I told my boyfriend that the consult was terrible. He invited me for his home so we could talk. But before I go, we had a fight. I accused him of making plans with his friends behind my back, because a common friend told me that they were getting out later. But my friend actually got confused, and he never talked to anyone about going out. So he got really pissed of. I was already terrible and that was worse
Later, he went to my apartament. But he was ignoring me because he was still angry. 
I got really sad. No one cared about me, about my crap day, my crap life. 
So I told him I want to finish it all, my life. He called my mother, stopped me from locking myself in the bedroom, so I couldn't kill myself. I cant live like this anymore. No one understands me, no one listens to me. 
I Just want to end this. I'm tired. So tired.

