I've never felt so empty and scared before like this. The panic attacks happen frequently and without reason. I'm no longer only having the worst of it once a month, the urges are everyday. 

I cant go to a hospital, i have a life to begin. I'll be starting college two hours away on sept 6th and I now have an apartment away from my parents that I need to pay for... It's all happening way to fast though and I fear I might fall deeper.

How can I just up and leave a huge step in my life because I can't handle the horrors in my head. After all, my boyfriend say's he'll take care of me but I just don't think he can help me battle this big of a demon.