So this is a regular for me (like four times a year) since it’s bad I would like to get some feedback on this: 
Im on a currently relationship with a father of a two and half yo (love the child) 
I do my therapy I do my meds and yet from time to time, I just feel overwhelmed with insecurity and fear of abandonment and I have this stupid episode in which I confide in a polite and respectful way my feelings to my partner. We’re both tired not from each other but from just our responsibilities and I usually isolate at night and drink whilst taking pills as well, because I want to numb myself. I’ve told this to my therapist the last time it happened two months ago,therapist just made sure that I understood that what I was doing was wrong (been on meds and therapy for ten years) any advice on this? I don’t express anger but it hurts to feel this much so I just try to numb it. Tks in advance. Clearly newbie here