With life + COVID + Med school, I've slowly gone into a deeper and depper depression over the last 3-4 years. I've lost all my motivation and passion and I don't have any will to study even though I still wanna be a doctor. I cognitively "know" that I can improve, but I don't believe in myself anymore because I've been trying so hard for years. 

I'm trying to set small goals and habits and just hoping I can eventually get to where I need, but I feel like no matter how much I force myself to, it all eventually comes crumbling back down because I don't beleive in myself. 

I feel like I can't get better without getting rid of my hopelessness, but I also don't know how to truly have hope.