Earlier in the year, I left a long term toxic relationship with a narcissist. After a few months, I eventually decided to get back out there and downloaded a dating app. The next day, I (27F) met this super cool guy (40M) on the app and after texting a bit, we decided to meet up and we really hit it off. We both wanted to do something casual, so it was a mix of super cute dates and great sex for over a month. During this month, I’ve tried to end it about 3 times. My reasonings were that we just weren’t compatible in the long term (he doesn’t want kids, I have a kid), we should date closer to our age and people we have more in common with etc., but every time, he’s convinced me to change my mind and I did because the chemistry was great. 

This last time I tried to end it, I stayed the reasons and was completely fine with it being over. I even told him we could still hang out occasionally if he wanted. He was super offended by this and told me how’s he’s told his friend about me and how he’s super happy. Again, I decided to change my mind because I was super flattered. Since then I’ve been going back and forth between loving to be with him and not thinking it was going to work and the last time we hung out the vibes were super off. Today he texted me saying ever since the last time I tried to end it, he’s been feeling weird about the whole thing and said that he things im an awesome girl but this just doesn’t work for him anymore. I replied that I felt the same and wished him well. Why am I so hurt about this when I was the one who initially wanted to end it anyway? I was even telllinf my friends how it got kind of boring and I was talking to new people on bumble anyway. Yet, today after I got that text I feel like shit and want him back. Ugh