So I’m really young, I’m engaged to a woman with BPD. She recently voluntarily decided to emit herself to the ER because she has started to hit herself. She hasn’t had voices in her head in a long time, but recently she has had a voice come into her head and it’s getting so bad to the point she feels she cannot stop herself. It’s so loud at times it drowns everything else out and the only way she can make it stop is by complying. 

I’m really proud of her that she is seeking help, she hasn’t really wanted me to stay with her for long periods of time in the hospital which is a bummer. I miss her already. I think maybe she just doesn’t want me to see her like this I don’t know. I love her so much and just want her to feel better, to be safe, and know that she is valuable beyond words. The voices in her head are lies. She is just so so tired. I’d trade in all that I have just to make the pain go away if I could. 

I wish she felt that she could have been more open to me, that she would have opened up about this sooner, not while she was in the hospital. She’s my best friend, and I love her so much. She doesn’t need to tackle this all on her own😔.

On the bright side she is seeking help, and we will get through this ☺️ one day at a time.