
My ex broke up in Jan. Then i got scared and did rebound with my 8 years of best friend. I was not able to give him attention so i told him to break up and we will start dating when i will give my 100% . He agreed. And after a month i sext with someone. My sister saw it on my phone and told him. He got hurt and he has blocked me and he don't want to talk anymore.  i am scared of loosing him. I mailed him every day . And he unblocked me and said to not message him and don't do anything and he needs time. I hurt him this thing never goes out of my mind. And he was waiting for me  . I thought that it's not cheating since we are not together m .its been 15 days already . I don't feel hungry and this something stuck feeling is making me so stressed. I went to doctor. They give me dome antacids and anti depressents. 

I feel like i fucked up my life and there is no future left for me. I feel so heavy in ny chest and this thing go 24/7 in my mind. 

He started talking and said we will be friends but it doesn't feel like it . J feel like a burden. Someone in the subway touched me and i can't share with him. He was my support system .