I’m so sorry, I don’t mean to be rude or mean or demean you guys, i’m looking for support and help. I don’t know where else to post this. 

I love my mom to death but she has schizophrenia and we got into a huge argument today. She’s so sweet but she has accused me for things I didn’t do all the time. She accused me of messing with her laundry and says thats why her clothes are itchy. She also accused me of spraying something on her that made her eyes hurt, and accused me of trying to secretly personally injure her (when i wasn’t even near her the whole day????). you name it, she’s accused me of it. 

So today, she came home from the grocery store and accused me of touching and opening her tray of donuts. I grabbed her donuts to put in the fridge (because she literally just left it out on the counter when she came home????) and she shouted from the other room “do NOT touch anything. I will put everything back” and i said “okay” and dropped the donut tray back on the counter. 

She came and saw the donuts, and apparently the seal was slightly opened (i guess when I grabbed it to put it in the fridge, and then put it back down, the seal got slightly cracked a little bit) and she got so mad at me. She told me I opened it on purpose, and I calmly explained that I picked it up to put it in the fridge, but when she yelled at me from the other room, I put it down. She continue to accuse me of opening the donuts on purpose, and we went back-and-forth a lot. Then she through all the donuts away in front of me, telling me I “ruined” them. And then I SNAPPED. We got into a HUGE argument that lead to me grabbing my keys and storming off. 

I’m going to my dad’s house for a couple days but after that, I decided I’m moving out for good. I already spoke to my big sister and she’s on board too. So i guess we’ll just find a two-bedroom apartment somewhere or something. 

I vented to my big sister already too but she’s on vacation right now in the in the islands with her friends. I just need someone to talk to. If anyone wants to talk to me or comment here on this post, or PM me or something, that would be great. Please. Or if u wanna call me, just pm me and i’ll give you my number. I’m crying as I write this. I have been nothing but a great daughter and loving person to her throughout all 24 years of my life, and all she does is accuse me of shit I didn’t do and treat me like I exist to piss her off or some shit. Please I need someone to talk to. Please. 

I know some people will suggest therapy or a psychiatrist, but…. been there done that. She’s never going to get help because she doesn’t think she has the illness. I’m just trying to find a way to cope knowing my mom has toxic traits and I’m trying to find a way to work around that. Im just trying to vent. I’m trying to find a way to accept the fact that no matter what, my mom will always continue to do this to me.