This has really gotten to the point of being extremely distressing for me recently and i'm not sure what to do about it. It seems like every day i'm thinking about my relationship w an ex more and more to the point i'm worked up and having full on sobbing sessions over it, despite us not even talking now (often). The relationship literally ended 7 years ago and i'm concious of the fact that my fixating on it is unhealthy and pointless but it's happening all the same and I just want to move past it. I get so sad thinking about it and how I behaved and how i've struggled to connect with anyone since despite being with other people and I don't know what it means. I feel honestly quite embarrassed that it's been so long and yet??? I think maybe it's possible that it's because of my own fucking it up that it bothers me so much.

Sorry if this makes no sense/was rambly I'm not sure what to make of it but thought maybe I'm not alone in this but I don't know.