Yesterday me (25f) and my bf (29m) of almost three years sat down and decided to end our relationship. We both came to the agreement that our relationship was no longer healthy, and would become toxic. It was really great to be able to not feel cornered, abandoned, or emotionally shattered. We both knew the conversation was coming because we had a heated argument over text earlier in the afternoon. Neither one of us thought it would be such a productive talk. We’ve been living with his parents for a couple of months (was trying to save some money) so I was planning on moving out in the next couple of months since we’re civil and still get along. A friend pulled some amazing strings without telling me and got me a gig working part time in exchange for free rent. I feel like four years ago I would have reacted so differently to the conversation with my now ex boyfriend last night. I would have broken down or let my fear of never being loved for who I am get in the way of what we were trying to accomplish - healthy and prosperous lives for each other. It just so happens that it isn’t together. There have been times when I have been so sick from crying and shaking that I’ve had to call out of work before. But I got up, took care of the dog, got bagels and went to work. I cried a couple times, but it was just for small moments, and I remembered that my self preservation is more important than being in a relationship. I remembered that I can be whole and still hurt. I hope this reaches someone and you know that it can get better. I still have bad days, they just don’t consume me. I don’t let them. I allow myself to feel and then I try to put the feeling away for a while until it needs to come back out again. I am so grateful. Please hang in there. Please please please. This is your sign. It. Will. Get. Better. You aren’t cursed for your entire life. You aren’t broken, you’re just trying to find the right words.