As above. Im 24 and for the good part of my life since I was 18 i have been pursuing an Engineering Major. I knew it was hard before enrolling, but the issue isnt the program itself but me. For the love of god I cant seem to get the hand of studying, I just cant.   


For a final exam I've been trying to pass for the last 3 years i've studied countless times. A couple months ago I studied for at least 1-2 months daily and I still couldnt pass a 1st year assignature.

 I do work and I somewhat have training/social life schedules but for the life of me I dont want to do anything else but graduate or at least get into more advanced assignatures. I know im blowing this out of proportion, that no ones guarantees me happiness after I graduate and, hell, even if i drop out and still do well in life I know an engineering major will be something that will haunt me for life.   


A bit more of context, I still live with my parents and I know that pursuing higher education is something not everyone gets the chance of doing. Furthermore, me nor my parents have debts since we own the place we live in and college here is "free" (not that its free lol, Its subsidized) so I know if I drop out and work I'll be missing a huge opportunity. 

Honestly I dont know what to do, i've tried to kill myself once and i thought after a lot of therapy/medication I left it behind but I just know its slowly creeping its way back.   


Dont know if this a proper place to post this but I'd like to hear opinions