I just feel like I’m not made to deal
with this world. When my symptoms were more manageable I did well in college and ended up at a good university. Since coming to uni however I’ve been struggling a lot with unresolved trauma and I’ve barely been able to focus on my degree. I feel so unmotivated and I just don’t care. I failed first semester because I didn’t hand any assignments in. 
I know I’m self sabotaging and I don’t think I can get out of it. I spend all my student loan as soon as I get it basically and I have no self control. I’m in debt nearly all the time, I’ve relapsed with self harm and I’m struggling to keep myself together. I don’t wanna be like this anymore.
I’m so jealous of my flatmates who seem to be able to stay on top of uni work and make rational decisions. I don’t see myself ever succeeding in life when I think and act like this. I can’t control my impulsivity and emotions and it’s ruining everything for me. Someone reassure me that I can get myself together somehow :( I’m so lost