I know it’s one of the main symptoms of this horrid illness, but .. I’m struggling a lot lately and was hoping maybe someone else could give me an insight into how they deal with this.. if I have the slightest thought that someone, especially my boyfriend, might leave me I want to immediately sabotage the entire relationship and push him away/break up so that I don’t get hurt. When .. reality, that’s the same outcome? I just can’t handle another boyfriend leaving me because “I’m too much”.. despite the efforts I put in, therapy and medication and I could go onnnnn.. I’m still suffering and symptoms are flaring up daily. Going through a medication change as well as a series of external stressors, any of which would send a neurotypical person into a state. 

Long story short - bpd is hijacking my brain so frequently they’re no longer BPD episodes but an entire series. Going on season four now. Any coping mechanism/strategies welcome. Thank you in advance