My anxiety has gotten so much worse in the past few months. Today I realized the extent of it.

My online friends (who all live several hours away in another state) were at a party, and they set up a camera at the party so me and some other people could interact with them and be part of the party. The thought of even being at the party caused me to have a panic attack and leave the call. 

I used to be able to go to parties all the time. I don’t understand what’s wrong with me, and how it has gotten to this point. I love these people so much, but I am so terrified of interacting with them in person that I have a panic attack whenever I even think about it.

I just really need support right now. I feel so horrible about myself.