So through my whole life since my dad dies when I was 6, I noticed that I was very aware of things. Maybe it’s because of what happened to me or it’s just in my genes. I saw him commit suicide so it left a hard scar. I’m 33 now and I feel like I don’t even have 1 friend. I never had real friends in school and I still feel that same exact way. Don’t get me wrong I like being alone but sometimes it hits me deep. When I do hang out with people and I listen to everything they got going on in life, I just feel like I don’t care.. I hate that I feel like that and I’m such a nice person. But what I think in my head to what I actually say are completely opposite. I love helping people in need and I always have respect for others. A friends brother came into my job today and I noticed he doesn’t like me… says mean things for no reason. I don’t know why I let people get to me like this but I wish sometimes people realize how much crap I hold in and it’s hard enough to live the way it is without their bs comments. Anyone feel like this? I can’t be alone. I feel like no one matches me. 😞