 I'm unlovable and uninteresting with the face and body and voice to match. It really doesn't matter the type of relationship, whether family, friend or attempted lover, once they've exhausted their use of me or simply found someone better (not difficult) they just leave without looking back, effortlessly and without any sense of loss or remorse.

 The constant abandonment, being ostracised, bullied and used have killed any personality I had. Now, I use all little energy I have to not kill the rest of me.
 I'm exhausted of feeling hopeful that there's any worth in me when someone shows an interest only for them to leave 3 - 6 months later and to remind me in every way possible that I'm simply just not good enough in every single aspect.

 I don't even know what the point of this post is, I'm just trying to distract myself for a while or until this need to hurt myself goes away but it's getting more and more difficult. I really can't do this much longer, I genuinely just don't have the energy. I don't know what to do with myself asides from the obvious. I just don't want to be unlovable and lonely anymore.