Everything is going so shit for me. I fucked up a friendship with my best friend because of my paranoia. Another friend (female) doesn't want to talk with me because people think we're dating (even though she and I know we're gay). My mom abused my trust to talk shit about me, and my physical and mental health is declining rapidly. I'm struggling to hold on y'all, I don't know how much longer I can hold on. I was considering suicide the past 3 days.