I don’t know where to begin but shits getting hard to handle. I got off methadone and a lot of other stuff about a year ago. I got a job I could work at home from because my moods won’t let me deal with people. I felt like I was doing good I felt like I was going to save money or atleast try and find some sort of happiness ever since I’ve been off the stuff I used to take to “cope” or atleast thought I was coping, but I’m having to deal with the stuff I never thought I’d have too. I was doing okay because I thought I atleast have a job and I’m atleast making money well a couple of days ago my house caught fire and has fire damage so now I’m laid up in a hotel not sure if I’ll be able to keep my job and I’m losing hope in everything. Just tired of shit being so hard. I feel like the world works against me I haven’t self harmed in a long time and thought I was over that shit but now I don’t have something to make me just fall asleep and forget about the world a blade to the wrist sounds tempting. I won’t. I can’t let myself back slide like that but I’m angry…angry I’m trying to do good and life keeps happening I can’t even get in the fucking shower my body hurts my minds racing and I just want to sleep.