I have something wrong with me. I have no drive at all. There are things I want to do but for whatever reason I never bring myself to completing those tasks. I haven’t done any of my school work in the 2 months we have been out. I still have trouble bringing myself to brush my teeth. Whenever I try to do something new with my life I always fall short and never pick up where I left off. These are all things I want to do and I know the consequences of failing all of my classes and I want to pass all of my classes and I would be put back into a hole if I failed everything. This has been going on for years and I have no idea why I CANT JUST FUCKING DO IT. It literally makes me so fucking mad. Why can’t I just pick up my shit and do it? I always wait around and lie to my parents and my therapist that I’m doing well in my class and everything is fine and dandy. I hate when I do bad in school it gets me depressed and I think I’m stupid even though I never fucking touched it! Am I just lazy? I’m just going to be a life failure if I don’t get this figured out. I’ll be living in my parents house forever and I’m not doing shit about it. I know where I’m going down in my life and I choose not to do fuck all. I just want to tell myself do it! But it never works I always flake out. I was such a good student and I was considered one of the smart kids back in 5th grade. But in 6th grade and onwards brushing my teeth and schoolwork has been a problem for whatever reason. I know the outcome, I know how it will make me feel, I know how I can turn my shit around, yet I do nothing for years and years. Sorry for repeating myself a lot I just wrote down everything I was thinking at the moment.