I cannot understand why I do this? I feel like it’s a punishment to myself maybe? I do it when i feel like straight up attacking someone or i’m so overwhelmed. I also end up with bruises on the side of my hands from hitting walls and tables. I am not violent with others at all, I think this is my way of exerting that anger. It fucking hurts because I am not weak at all 😭

Does anyone else have this (not good) coping mechanism? I’ve tried to stop but I’m just not myself when i’m like that. 

My boyfriend is the only one who has witnessed it besides my mother and he always stops me and holds me, he is a saint.