Every day I go to school and get back from it and fall into my bed and cry, each day blends into eachother and I see everyone around me have nice friendships and people who care about them. No one gives a shit  about me and I have no one, no one to talk to or vent to. Everywhere I go I feel like an outcast and out of place, if I can even muster up the energy to go anywhere. Any friendship or relationship I ever try to make falls  apart because I get anxious or awkward. Waking up is the worst thing because I know I just have a day of emptiness ahead of me, every day is just the same over and over again. The only thing I ever enjoy in the day is listening to music. I dont want to kill myself but it is a thought that stays in the back of my mind and. I just feel exhausted and tired so often, its like I have to drag my own body when I do anything. I know my life is probably alot better than some other peoples and I dont want to sound ungrateful or anything but I just cant help but feel an overwhelming sadness when looking back on it. I would honestly do anything just to have someone I could talk to or understand what im feeling, because as  of right now it just feels like im alone in everything I do.