I've been feeling depressed for the past 4 years especially. There were a lot of traumatic things that happened in my family in this time and my family have some serious problems. It's not some stupid stuff either, it's real shit. Anyway, because of this I've felt like shit for so long. During my childhood there was a lot of bad shit that went on, stuff I'm not gonna bring up but it resulted in this whole 4 years of depression. For the first 2 years of this deep depression I was no longer living with family but with some strangers, but not by choice. These strangers treated me like shit for the 2 years I lived with them. Now those 2 years are over and I live with my family again, however I'm still depressed as fuck because of other shit. Don't want to go into too much detail but stuff to do with people I have to deal with. This has been weighing me down so bad. Because of all the trauma from my childhood up to now it's made me shut myself off from the world. People say that shit makes you stronger but no that shit made me weaker. I'm a weakling now who can't even leave the house without being forced out. I spend my days wasting away reading sometimes but on my computer most of the day. My family try to force me outside but I'm okay with rotting away in my room. I'll be moving out in a couple years so they won't complain anymore and I won't have to put up with that shit.  Who knows maybe I'll succumb to the depression and end this shit. Probably not yet but maybe one day.