i'm 18 years old and i have an official bpd diagnosis.

well i finished high school last year and i didn't start university after (because i was suicidal) so now i have a free year what's actually not so refreshing. since some months i'm on my right way. i'm on therapy, i'm on meds (lorazepam), i'm studying for my college application, i'm making friends etc etc. 

but last week i went to my doctor and told her that sometimes i still have suicidal thoughts so she prescribed me an antipsychotic it's called Arisppa (aripiprazole) and actually it's not good. i mean i should take 5mg  a day and i did take it on Thursday but that totally fucked up my day. it made me SO DAMN SLEEPY and dozy i couldn't even sit because i was so tired.. despite it i couldn't sleep at night so friday was almost the same. now it's saturday, it's better now but i'm still VERY tired and sleepy and i just can't figure out how tf should i take this thing daily if a one time try made me kinda dead for days??? plus i asked my doctor the exact question: "ARE YOU SURE IT WON'T MAKE ME SLEEPY BECAUSE I HATE THAT AND THAT MAKES ME SUICIDAL?" and she said no, it won't. but yes, it does.

what now?

please help♥