I’m 26 and I’ve struggled with MDD since early adolescence. I’ve tried so many different medications and gone through more therapists than I can count over the past ~13 years. Regardless of what I try I’m not getting any better. The thought that I have to continue feeling like this for 50 more years makes me want to cry. I feel empty, I have no idea who I am, I hate myself for the relationships and opportunities I’ve wasted, I don’t think there’s anything more to me than the facade I put on for the few people I interact with on a daily basis. I can still fake it through the day but Im quickly approaching a point where I don’t think I can keep it up. 

I guess Im trying to understand how common my experience is? For those of you who have fought depression for years with no success what keeps you going?