Im about to lose my job. I work AGR for the national guard. I can’t pass the tape test. I screwed up my metabolism from starving myself multiple times to lose weight. Now I’ve been in recovery for binge eating disorder since august. I’ve gained 20 lbs and I now weigh 180 lbs at 5’4.  I don’t starve myself anymore and I don’t have the energy anymore to do it. Unfortunately now I can’t pass tape for sure. I’m about to lose my job. It kills me seeing big people at work still have their position and I’m about to lose mine. I’ve done so much for this unit. I fixed it up because my predecessors left a giant mess. Now I’m about to lose my job for being a fat ass. I neglected my health working long hours in the office, for almost a year I didn’t see daylight because I would come in really early and leave very late. I am in so much debt and I was getting it cleared up but now… I am screwed. If I die my family will get 400,000 and then some. So I’ve decided what I need to do. I’m really tired. So this is for the best. Good bye.