I've recently got hired at Whataburger and while I find the job to give me a rush that I really enjoy, I have made many mistakes on the job that were extremely bad. In fact, I ended up getting that look from a coworker that nobody wants to get. I actually cried on the job even in front of the managers. But my mask hid it from them. They told me to not be so hard on myself. But I find it so hard not to be given how many mistakes I've made so far. 

Another thing that's been going on is that my state is banning delta 8 THC (a federally legal alternative to delta 9 THC) and I find this stuff so medicating in terms of creating an escape from my problems. And many other people here experience the medicating effects as well. The ban hasn't officially become law yet, but we're all scared that it's highly likely at this point. I don't care what your political beliefs are. If you're a Republican, that's fine. If you're a Democrat, that's cool, too. Do not argue politics in the comments. 

With all this stress going on, I want to cry so badly. Like the type of crying where you're in the fetal position in your bed having your pillow soak up your tears. But I can't at all. Sometimes, I may shed multiple tears at time time, but that's it. I have years of sadness and anxiety built up inside me and I just want to let it all out at once. How can I do this?