Ok, so I gave up alcohol and drugs 10 years ago, but still have a daily caffeine addition, I drink tea and coffee.


When I was a drinker I used to meet and talk to women easily, but since I quit I can never break into social circles and start relationships. If I go to a party which is rare, I  go home early because of anxiety, boredom, just as the other people drinking are starting to have fun. I have become more introverted and usually socialise with just 1 or 2 good close friends.

My impression is that women only value men who are in a social circle. They seem to get into a social circle first and then attract towards the top men in that social circle, if he is confident and charismatic and social he will be more popular.  Any thoughts or advice welcome. I am 38 and still looking for a good relationship. Thanks!