Hello Everyone, 
  
I’ve been a long lurker ever since my sister found out she had BPD.
  
TLDR; My sister hurts people when she splits. Is this normal? Are people with BPD able to control their action during a split? She keeps justifying her abuse towards others and it’s led her to getting arrested tonight. How can we help her? She’s gone to the ward twice, attends DBT, and has a therapist.

   I’ve noticed that whenever my twin sister gets triggered she has a complete melt down. She throws things, scratches people, and screams uncontrollably. Unfortunately, most of her melt downs happen in the car where she tries to gain control of the steering wheel to swerve the car on the road. She has been sent twice to psych ward during this pandemic and she has been doing DBT and therapy. Is this normal for people with BPD? Can you control your body when you split or is not possible (genuine question)? We try our best to avoid triggering her but it’s like walking on egg shells. How can we help her so that she won’t harm others? 

Tonight she was arrested for domestic abuse against her boyfriend and I really am trying my best to teach my sister that it’s not okay to harm others when you have a breakdown but she keeps justifying it.