I had a very stressful and kind of terrible year. It was so much stuff that I kind of went numb. A lot of  people in my family passed away, my brother got diagnosed with diabetes, the isolation from Covid lockdowns broke me down, I graduated high school virtually and deferred all my choices for college to go to a CC which was a smart idea. However I kind of just pushed those thoughts away. I started my first semester of college this January and the events of the past year hit me. Couple with a very stressful workload and failing a class, I am starting to collapse from stress. When I wake up I’m so anxious about school and my future that I stay in bed or keep panicking. The only time I feel fine is in my sleep.

I also think about my friendships and how quickly they ended, just one day we were in school and then poof. I never really got to say good bye to some people. 2019 was a really great year for me and I felt content with life and it all came crashing down. I know I can pick it up, but I’m dreading the future so much, I think this is what makes me anxious.

I didn’t realize how bad it was and I’ve been panicking ever since. I got referred to a wellness counselor, he helped a bit, but he is sick and won’t be back for a week or two. 

I think this is just a vent but has anyone been feeling like this lately?