I moved to a new city for my first corporate job and I’m miserable. I left everyone I cared and loved. I left my friends albeit some of them were a bit toxic but I still miss our conversations. I loved my home city - I loved running everyday, going out to bars/clubs meeting new friends or simply sitting in the company of my siblings and parents.

I left all this for a fucking job in a city I hate. A city where I know no one and everyone I do know just wants to use me or takes advantage of me. No one who really care. I can’t go run or walk around because it’s so fucking dangerous here if I walked outside I would get mugged.

I’m telling myself that the job is worth it because I need the experience but my depression is back and my mental health is deteriorating. I think about death too often and cry daily. I smoke half a pack a day and I constantly feel like nothing has any meaning.