I'm done. I used to have so much energy but I just can't any more. I had a child, they were disabled, I fought and fought for them to get the best treatment possible. Then they died very suddenly at the age of 3. My life felt over. I struggled but began feeling some semblance of normal again. This year, I lost a baby, they were born too early and didn't survive. I couldn't believe this was happening. 

Then, a few days ago, I got arrested for the first time in my life for suspected assault! Handcuffed and everything. I didn't do it and was released the next day with no charge. I have never been so mortified in my life! I did nothing wrong and then I'm suddenly in a cell! I just can't quite believe all this is happening to me. I start getting a bit of normality back and then I get floored again.

My trust in the police is completely gone. I could lose my job over this as I work in care, despite no charges being brought, the criminal record check can include arrest information that is relevant and I'd say being arrested for assault is very relevant to working with vulnerable people!

My life is over. I'm so done. I want to see my babies and be rid of this crushing despair!