Once again I got into a huge argument with my parents over me talking about how my father had treated me (and my brother) since childhood. I brought up the physical abuse, the emotional abuse, manipulation, bullying, never apologizing, refusing to acknowledge his behaviour and never changing, ignoring us when we talked about how we felt when he would abuse us, he always has to disagree with me, always has to go against me even in front of others, always comments on weight and looks negatively, never happy with us, puts immense pressure on us for school and careers, mocks mental illness, putting us down constantly, mocking us, comparing us to others, not being there for us emotionally etc. My father (as always) tried to change the subject and tried to say that I started an argument from nothing. He then got upset and went to his room where he slammed the door multiple times and screamed he would never talk to me again. 

This was something that went on a lot when I was a kid. Anytime I would bring up being hurt by something he said or did to me, my father would shut me down by calling me crazy, saying I was overreacting, calling me an actor and telling me to move on. He made all my family think I was crazy and a brat because I was reacting to his abuse which he obviously hid to others. 

My mother of course took his side as she always has. I’ve been saying pretty much the same stuff since I was 13 about my dad and his treatment of us. She always finds a way to minimize what he did. She always has a reason for his actions as if abuse should have a valid reason. She finds a way to victimize him and to make it seem like I in some ways deserved the abuse. Abuse (especially physical) was apparently happening in every home according to my parents. When I say that both me and my brother have been negatively impacted as adults in our 20s now, my mother refuses to believe our experiences have anything to do with how we turned out.