I feel so emotional charged, the is anger, fear, loneliness, isolation, really small things kick me of and I just feel like a full barrel of water and nothing can fit inside anymore...

I know if I would cut myself or would try something stupid and fail it will reset it... But I try not giving into those motion...

The worst part is I can feel like crying and just wanting lay next to a person and feel someone
To totally isolaten myself from everything and everyone.

It is now 6 month with not real human interaction for and without touching a lifing thing (besides flowers)
And sure im used to it but it still breaks me so hard, just sitting in my hole digging deeper and deeper..