I know I’m being a baby but I just need to vent because y’all understand me...

I hate when my boyfriend doesn’t reply back to me in iMessage but will on Snapchat. Like I know we text in huge paragraphs so it’s easier to reply to what I said on snap but ugh I’m HURT MAN... I just want him to text me the fuck back for some reason when he doesn’t a void is unfulfilled with me. I legit feel like I have a hole in my soul or something, I’m broken dude over not replying in a text. Now granted he is 12 hours ahead right now because he’s gone right now but I’m such a fucking baby. I’m just sad. I feel like maybe what I said was a little too much because I am too much honestly, I’m a lot to take on so knowing that I’m always like fuucckk, i wouldn’t reply to me either. He’s deployed right now but they have it good over there where he’s at. I JUST WANT HIM TO TEXT BACK. I’m legit about to delete all my social media’s AGAIN but I can’t I have to wait a week with stupid Instagram because I just got mine back. 

It’s weird I feel like when my bf doesn’t text me back it’s a form of control which is not true at all but I’m always thinking everyone is fucking with me, always?! And that I’m way too much for anyone to handle. Not to mention my humor is dark and I’m super sarcastic and I sound super hyper all the time in texts too.

I just wish my mind wouldn’t trip balls over this.. like it’s okay for someone not to text back immediately, they deserve to do whatever they want to do during their day and then come back to you with open arms and reply. I just wish I could get that through my fucking mind. I do it too! I fuckin won’t text back when I’m busy or having a day too. And I’m over here being needy af although I would never show it. 

I’m gonna start my period soon so I’m all weird right now.