Today I had an interesting revelation that I wanted to share with you guys.

I had a conversation with my FP. It wasn’t emotionally charged or anything. I went to this person for their advice in an area where they are an expert in. In our conversation, this person told me “you know you can always come to me. You won’t always catch me in a good mood; there will be times Im stressed, having bad a day, or have a lot on mind, and I may not sound too happy to hear from you. But remember that I love you even when I’m short with you.”

When my FP said this to me, they said it from the heart. We weren’t having an emotionally charged conversation. I didn’t put this person in a situation where they felt like they had to say this. They don’t even know about my BPD. They just said it because they meant it.

And it just sort of clicked for me. Our FPS, if they’ve stayed in our lives despite our ups and downs, genuinely love us. But they have their own lives to live. They have their struggles, their feelings, and their own needs. We aren’t the center of their worlds, and we shouldn’t be. Even if we were the center of their world, it wouldn’t be enough. We’ll always crave more. 

But it’s so important to remember what my FP told me: They love us, even on their worst day. I’ve never had an FP put it that simply, and honestly for me. Hearing it from my FP made such a difference. And I know you’re not hearing it from your FP, but I honestly hope it helps you in some way.

Keep on fighting. 