I realised that in boredom I tend to find immediate intimacy from anybody. I think this boredom comes from the feeling of avoid inside me which can be better described as feeling empty. Feeling empty is one of the major symptoms of BPD. And i10 to conclude this feeling with finding intimacy. Intimacy with anybody which later gets me in trouble. It goes as far as to obsessing over a person feeling this need to have sex thinking about cheating and making all kind of scenarios and mind. As wrong as it sounds it is more difficult to endure and go through this struggle of mixture of feelings. And the experience of feeling high and low towards this urge.