often times when I am trying to vent about a conflict, whether it be with friends, family, or co workers, my husband always comes up with excuses for the other people and never really sympathizes with me. it makes me feel like he doesn't have my back, and that he always believes the other party is right before he believes i am right. I find this very frustrating, as when he gets upset and wants to vent abt conflict in his life, I always say things like "that's so frustrating!! I'm so sorry those people are being jerks" in order to make him feel validated; but I don't think he does the same for me.

I've brought this up so many times but he says he doesn't understand what I want, no matter how many times I explain. he is a good listener, which i appreciate, but oftentimes i want him to empathize with me and make me feel seen and heard instead of just listening and saying Mhm.

It makes me wonder if this is caused by my BPD or if its something I genuinely have a right to be frustrated about.