I’ve never been abused - not sexually, mentally, or emotionally. I wasn’t neglected physically and I don’t think I was neglected emotionally (though my other posts may seem to indicate such). I don’t think my family has had any more serious discourses than the average; my parents are still together.

My life is good, and I should be happy. I don’t have anything to complain about.

So why am I unhappy? Why do I self harm?

I feel so stupid. I know people that have been raped and abused, people who have significant trauma; for lack of a better phrase, their mental illness “makes sense.” I don’t have that, and I don’t think I should feel the way I do. I just want to know what’s wrong with me - I should be fine. I should be happy. I hate myself because of it, and I feel like I can’t reach out to anyone because I can’t tell them why. I can’t even reach out to my family because they’re dealing with someone suicidal currently and my problems aren’t a big enough deal. I don’t want to worry them. 

I just...I just want to know that I’m not crazy and I’m not pathetic. I’m really sorry to whoever is reading this for ranting.