I am almost done with extensive therapy for the last 9 months, 4 days a week. And I really felt like I had my symptoms under control. Before I got in to therapy I would get angry so often, throwing things and just screaming the worst things at my partner, friends and family. But therapy really helped me manage it. Until 3 weeks ago… All of a sudden I am triggered by almost anything that I perceive as abandonment, belittling or rejection, mostly with my partner. The bpd rage is happening at least ones a week lately. And they are bad. I’m throwing things, yelling, saying things I don’t mean: like I hate you, we should break up, I don’t like you anymore. I’m just fucking my relationship up at this point. 

And the worst is I don’t know what triggered the intense triggering. I tried to figure it out in therapy. I think it might have to do with the fact that therapy will come to an end and that I have to deal with real grown up life again, on my own. And I do not feel ready at all for that. It makes me feel like I’m being abandonment. And it makes my symptoms and triggers flare up like crazy. 

I’m just wondering what makes your symptoms flare up and how do you cope? Just curious