im tired with my fucking life, i feel depressed even though i have friends, even have a boyfriend who care about me a lot, but still im suffering everyday. 
there was a bright time of my life that i actually get over this depression, i was love myself more, tried hard as fuck to radiate positive energy, for once in my life i feel so happy... but that doesn't last long. 
now i dont know what to do expect crying alone in my room everyday, none of my friends can help me, my lover can't help me. i feel like a fucking burden to them. i just wish that i can just go to sleep and never wake up again, and my irl will forget everything about me so they dont feel sad. i just wish that i could somehow disappear, never existed in this world. or more "easy" solution - i don't want to feel depressed anymore.