But, I'm switching meds soon and I'm a little scared. The hallucinations have gotten worse and they're not stopping when they're supposed to. When they always have. 

I might be developing schizoeffective disorder. Everything is scary right now. I'm trying so hard to keep it together for the people around me, but I feel like I'm coming apart inside. I know, that it's okay to not be okay but I'm REALLY not okay.

I don't really know why I typed all this out. I just need to feel like someone is listening to me and not rolling their eyes at my pain. 

I can't really tell what's real sometimes. I feel like the world is attacking me while it falls apart. The constant whispering is so exhausting. It doesn't even stop when I sleep anymore.

Hopefully the new meds will give me some quiet. Just a little respite. A break from the noise and the shadows that are always with me now.