Listening to sad Joji music and thinking about hard times. Thinking about how delusions have always been my favorite friend. And thinking about how many times forcing myself to be delusional helped me through. And now it's getting me through things again. 

Listening to music, laughing at my sad memories, dancing happily to the songs that make me cry. Trying my best to not let myself fall deeper. And it's working. 

Still so sad.