I’ve struggled with anxiety ever since I was a little girl but nobody took much notice or care towards my mental health as a kid and onwards. I only finally sought out help once I got older. Even then it’s been hard to force myself to go a therapist because I get severe anxiety even before going to an appointment. 

Even before going to an interview for jobs I panic the day before and throw up. I’ll get severe migraines. But I need a job but it’s such a struggle for me to function. I wish it wasn’t like this and I want to get better but it just feels like I’ll never get better or that it’s too late for me.

When I talk to other people I don’t know I’m very quiet and kinda just nod along. I can’t make conversation and I get nervous I’ll say the wrong things.

It makes me feel like a loser in life as it’s stopped me from accomplishing the goals I’ve wanted too. I don’t want to be panicking or throwing up before a job interview. It’s so exhausting and all my past counselors have just recommended Zoloft. Which doesn’t work for me anymore but they just keep upping the dose. 

Does anyone have any advice? I want to go to therapy again but it feels pointless sometimes. 

I really just hate having to deal with this and wish I were “normal”