So, about a year ago, a had a huge manic
Psychotic break after smoking weed, I had delusions, and did the most embarrassing things known to man. I got hospitalized twice, and was diagnosed with bipolar 1 with psychotic features.
after a couple months, all delusions had gone away after meds, but after I came out of mania, I became, from what I can only explain as feeling “disabled”,mentally, to be exact, it’s hard to explain but it’s as if my brain is having a hard time functioning like I used to, or even function to the same degree of what I consider to be normal, especially in the work place, it’s like I can’t learn as easy or Retain as much??? Also I can’t think of anything to say to anybody anymore, it’s like my mind just goes blank.
 I went from one of the most talkative, creative, high functioning people, to almost completely quiet, awkward, and having no substance whatsoever, it’s like all of personality and intellect have just declined juristically, 
Can’t connect this anyone, I feel mentally inferior to literally everybody I encounter,
Can’t make friends, can’t go on dates, shit even being around people I like isn’t even enjoyable because I can’t keep an engaging convorsation. not to mention all of my passion for anything has gone away.
my life has gone to absolute garbage because of this and I genuinely have wanted to commit suicide multiple times over it, 
CAN ANYBODY RELATE??