I had a falling out with two college friends 3 months ago and i can't stop ruminating about it. Basically one of them said that my boyfriend, who is from Ireland, must be in the IRA because he speaks Irish. I tried to gently explain to her that its considered offensive in Ireland (where my boyfriend and I live) to make that assumption and tack on a political view to someone's language; that would be like if someone assumed she was a Trump voter because she has an American accent. She then attacked me full-on, saying that there is nothing wrong with saying he's in the IRA and that if any of my Irish friends don't like the IRA they're "just a few privileged people who's feelings are hurt" and i dont know what oppressed people actually feel because my friends and i "are too privileged". Now to be clear, i dont know much about the IRA so i dont have a strong opinion about them, but my best friend's mother nearly died from an IRA bomb and has scars all over her body. And i have a good job now, but i grew up dirt poor in a single parent household, neither of my siblings and i had a bed growing up we slept on the floor or couch. So for this "friend" of mine to call me privileged, and to minimize my Irish friends' trauma, really frigging hurt. The other college friend didn't understand why i was so offended, so i felt ganged up on and cut them both off. Now i cant stop ruminating about it, and im still very hurt at her comments and i dont know how to get over it. Every time i think of her saying "your privileged friends just had their feelings hurt", i think of my friends mother with scars everywhere and i just feel so much anger