Apologies in advanced for the vent i just need to get this all out and maybe get advice from those in similar situations either current or past.

TLDR is at the bottom.

On Sunday my boyfriend of almost 2 years came to mine as we needed to talk, we hadn't seen each other for 2 weeks and beforehand we were only seeing each other for a few hours once a week and he had expressed how unhappy he was with life. When he came through he told me he was mentally and physically drained and just doesn't feel like he's in a relationship anymore because of the lack of time we spend together along with the fact for the last year we've barely been having sex (because of my hormones, ED and other things making it painful such as trauma). He says it's in no way my fault he just feels he needs to be alone and not in the right place for a relationship but that he still loves me, but is no longer in love and feels he’s given his all and can’t give anymore. During our relationship I lost my mum and got diagnosed with BPD as well as relapsed into an ED; this all affected our relationship as my moods became extremely unstable and our sex life became non existent. I also developed an FP attachment with him because he became my main point of support. I can't stop blaming myself and feel if I do move on and can be more affectionate I'll always hold guilt for not being able to give him that same love despite him being the best partner I've had relationship-wise and the only one not to judge me for my mental health issues. 

What confuses me though is the fact he got more upset when  I mentioned we'll probably never see or speak to each other again especially due to the fact we don't live in the same town, and he told me he'd still check up on me, etc and even said that he'd still look after my pet when I went away next month since he has a house key to mine. He also said he didn’t need to take all his stuff away right now when I asked if he wanted to take some of his clothing and a gift I had bought him that was part of something he actively collects. I don't know if this means he wants to keep contact in hopes that when he feels better and gets his own mental health sorted we will get back together or if this was just a nice way to let me down gently. He's removed me from things such as his private story and deleted any photos etc we had together and hasn't been in contact since the night we broke up when he told me in texts he would call me tonight to let me know how he got on with getting help. 

To make matters worse it's exactly two weeks before my birthday; a day I honestly struggle to enjoy over the last couple of years and we had all these things planned together for that and part of me wants to still include him but I know this isn't helpful to either of us, I’ve also called in sick to work and just struggle to function on a day to day basis. 

TLDR; boyfriend split up with me, says its due to how unhappy he is in life and the fact he's no longer in love but does still love and care for me, some signs point to him not wanting us to be out of each other lives completely but others point to this just being a nicer way to let me down, he was my FP and I don’t know how to even imagine a future without him 

I honestly just don't know what to do, do I keep some hope that he might just need the time apart to fix his mental health and that we may still have a future together, or do I make the move to ask for us to give our things back to one another and cut ties?
It’s just so hard to imagine life without him and I don’t know when it’ll stop hurting.