I try to intentionally make myself feel bad for random shit by telling myself that I don’t feel bad that will mean I’m a bad person. Recently, my teacher acknowledged me by saying ‘ so you are back’ in a mocking tone, since I always avoid answering in class either by skipping it or leaving the meeting. At first, I didn’t feel any shit , I was like whatever. Suddenly, Idk from where, this stupid ass voice kept on telling me why I should feel bad? It was really overwhelming. I wasn’t able to stop. I feel like I am being dramatic af and trying to pity myself. I’m not able to stop myself. Idk how to deal with it. These thoughts don’t even stop, I am not even kidding I feel I am going crazy. I don’t want to tell this to friends and parents but they either brush it off and tell me just to stop thinking. Sometimes I just want a car to hit me so it can be stopped.

Sorry for my English.