I can’t comprehend this, I really can’t, I don’t understand any of this. Me, I feel absolutely *nothing* but an obsessive and deep hatred for myself as a suffer of mental illness. I hate my illness with a burning passion and hate myself even more passionately for having developed such a disorder to begin with. Furthermore I hate other people that suffer from mental illness, I can’t stand any of it, either they’re whining and crying about how hard things are or patting each other on the back and hugging and saying it’ll get better. They say to “love yourself”. Myself. 

FUCKING WHAT!?!?!? ARE YOU INSANE!?!? WHY THE FUCK WOULD I LOVE MYSELF!?!?! WHY THE FUCK WOULD I THINK IT GETS BETTER!?!?!?! AND WHY THE FUCK WOULD I ACCEPT A HUG!?!?

It’s like other mentally ill people, except for the completely non-functional ones, half them all seem so fucking positive and filled with compassion and love, I feel these things too, but not at all for myself or anything I associate with myself other than my friends and family (all of whom I know are superior to me). I don’t know how mentally ill people don’t feel utter hatred for themselves and each other, in fact, when I turn my own thoughts away from hatred I feel ashamed and confused.