It’s been extremely rough. I was bullied to the the ground in middle school since my dad was the principle. 

it hurt terribly I reached my breaking point and literally cried twice in front of everybody. I used to think they were my friends and they all turned against me. So in high school, I  reconnected with some of my elementary school friends and I didn’t pay attention to them making fun of me and my cousin who was there for couple of months. Like I can’t believe they considered me friend and always wanted me join them only to do that. 

And on my last semester, i cut them all off and found other group of friends who were nice to me and for the first time i felt welcomed and i would sit with them and they would talk with me and stuff. but then i tried to hang out with them numerous times they always said ‘sorry i’m busy, can’t sorry maybe later’. And when we graduated they didn’t even add me to friends group or didn’t talk to me or anything. That was in 2018! It’s still haunts me.

in the country i live in, all the people are like that so i just can’t walk up to somebody and say ‘hey can we friends’ they all in groups so he’ll tell them about me and they would laugh even though we’re adults. i feel like everybody here should have made friends before college. maybe in other countries it’s normal because they take mental health &amp; depression but here, no way. 
I hope somebody can guide me on the right steps, i have recently stopped watching my only addiction(po*n) so i hope i can find something before i get depressed more and return to that bad habit. 

they killed my confidence in trying to talk to people, i just feel helpless, it’s even worse that i have a younger brother who is normal and even go everyday with his friends and i don’t want my parents to feel like i’m not the mature one.