The guy I had a thing with, broke things off for another girl. I constantly compare myself and my body to her. It’s obvious she’s really pretty and thicc and I’m just fat and ugly, and although I haven’t talked to him in months I miss him so much. I know we’re never gonna get back together or back to what we “had” but it just made me realize how much I miss talking to someone I like or just being with someone in general. Like I’m at my worst when I’m alone but when I’m with someone I feel so free, and my bpd isn’t as severe ? But I do obsess and I do get jealous and go on/off so much that no one would ever want to be with me and my messed up mind. 