Hi everyone,

This is my first time posting in here. I feel so helpless and like a monster. I try so hard to be a good person and a good friend, but no matter how hard I try, I end up splitting and hurting the people I love. I end up feeling like a monster. I feel like I'm a painful burden to the people who mean the most to me. I feel like it doesn't matter who it is, I eventually wear them down with the same mistakes over time. I try so hard to not make them, but they happen. I hate being like this. I hate hurting others. I understand why people with BPD commit suicide. I feel like it's hopeless. I just don't want to hurt the people I care about anymore. 