I dont know. Im sorry. I just didnt know anyone i could talk to right now. Im tired. Everyday is a constant battle and Im always losing. Fighting myself and the voices that keep saying I dont deserve to live, I dont deserve to be happy, and that everyone would be better off with me gone. Im tired. I keep seeing visions or scenes where Im finally dead and idk if it should scare me or finally give me peace. Idk what to believe in anymore. A part of me is scared that Ill leave a haunting image to those who are close to me. Deep down i wish they would just die of old age so they dont have to bear the burden of me dying. Gods playing a cruel joke for letting them live this long. I dont care anymore about things cuz they wont matter when im gone. Im sorry. Everything every thought is jist messed up. I cant think straight. Im tired. Im losing the fight. Im desperate. I dont know if ill ever be here on again. I cant see the future. I never did see one to begin with. Idk what to say. I guess i just needed to say it. Goodbye. Im sorry.