my boyfriend broke up with me without giving me a real reason (to be completely honest i don't even want one) now it's been about a week and i'll be happy and ok with it for a while then i'll start to miss him or get angry over his decision (in the end though i am trying to accept it that we won't get back together and that i have no realistic chance of talking to him about it -nor that i should we reached a dead end and i knew it) but since i'm newly diagnosed i've felt guilty and ashamed of trying to express any emotions (before i was i would just snap on close friends and family or my mom but since it's hard aswell -) i swallow it up and keep it inside
yet this sinister feeling in my gut won't let me sleep at night or go about my day in peace (to clearify there are a lot of other things bothering me but for some reason i just focus that anger and add all those feelings on top the breakup which causes me to feel even worse about it) (as if the only thing i WANTED to be angry at is the breakup, like i refuse to be upset with anything else) i havent talked about it to anyone nor do i really want to either yet i can't stop going over it again and again in my head and torturing myself followed by anger and the fight of keeping it inside 
but i feel like i can't take it much longer
so please 
does anyone have an idea on what i could do?