(I’m a non English speaker) 
I just turned 17, already lived 2 severe depression, take 300mg of quetiapine every days for bipolarity disorder, my family (on my father's and mother's side) has a very strong psychiatric history. 

I feel like I'm becoming a monster sometimes and only realize it when I restart feeling emotions.  I am sorely lacking in empathy, I have a hard time feeling emotions, I like to manipulate my family and friends, I have very high self-esteem, I totally reject emotions seeing them as despicable and I’m feeling empty as hell.

Today I am starting to feel emotions again, even a little too much, and I realize that now what I have been lasting for several weeks.

Do other people feel the same way?  Does this have a link with my bipolarity?