  Recently had something bad that happened that messed me up. Had a pretty bad mental break and anxiety attack. Ended up self harming for the first time in pretty much years. I had been in an okay place before. Lost some sentimental items that I can't get back. I feel like a failure. I feel like people judge me for being so behind people my age, they think I'm lazy but I'm just so terrified. I want to get away from my toxic family but I can't support myself alone because of my anxiety. I feel stuck with my parents, I want to move away with my boyfriend. I feel like that may be a bad decision though because it wouldn't be good financially relying on him even if he's a good guy. The only job I'm capable of sustaining is part time and even that causes me so so much stress. feel so trapped. I want to be normal. I feel like I can't even be myself in my own home, I wish I could get away but I'm stuck.