I've done DBT, CBT and every talking therapy under the sun, I can control my emotional reactions, not act out, hold down a great job and friends, not bombard people with txts ect but that doesn't mean the emotions are no there.

I started seeing someone recently, and I'm terrified I've fucked it up, I decided I had emotions for them, that was enough, I'm over analysing every text, every interaction and now scared to txt in case it looks needy, despite me knowing they're working an 80hr week.

I'm fed up of the huge highs and lows the anxiety and the pain, I just want to curl up and die, I don't understand why we have this. We be able to control our actions, but the emotional roller coaster will always remain.