I'm cutting you off for your own good. You're young. You can have a full life with someone who isn't sick like me. I don't want what you want, and considering my BPD you've already made a lot of concessions.  I'm fighting against every instinct to contact you, as you were my fp for so long.  You may want to seek therapy as well after what's happened between us, and maybe reevaluate how you treat people, especially people who were so hopelessly dependent on you.  We've both said and done unforgivable things. Cut your losses. Move on.  Enjoy your inheritance and enjoy England.  Goodbye.