I saw a video on social media of a kid explaining BPD and it blew my mind.  I’m a 46 year old male and I’m positive I have it.  I knew there was something wrong with me but I didn’t know it had a name much less a subreddit.  I thought maybe I had anger issues or was just super antisocial with a side of panic attacks. After reading all the signs I pretty much checked them all. I have always felt that I am not very mature for my age. I actually still feel like I’m a teenager. My friends kid even told his mom I was like an adult child.  Which she told him “YOU DON’T SAY THAT”... Anyway I freaked when I saw that favorite person thing.  I went back and I’ve had 11 favorite persons.  I’m still good friends with all the guys  except one and every single girl ghosted me.   I can see why cause I was kinda clingy and sometimes scary mad. Not that I would hurt anyone but just scared them.  I’ve worked as a restaurant manger my whole life moving to five different states .  I’ve always been well liked as a boss but I think that is because I never wanted to be disliked by anyone.   Well it turns out you can’t be buds with all your workers and expect everything to work all the time.   I just sold my house and moved again and decided to get out of the food industry.  I’m not sure what I’m gonna do but I wanna get away from  being the boss and having the spotlight on me!  Sorry for rambling on but I’m just kinda amazed at all the people like me!  Reading all the posts has given me hope that I might find a job that I enjoy .