I (38, M) feel that my life is slipping away with unfulfilled dreams. Today I listen to depressing 90's music I used to listen as a teen and want to go back in time to fix something. Confusion about personal identity have led to stagnation. I have tried so many career paths but have never felt any of them as my own. The time when I could become a doctor, a musician, a carpenter, has passed. I have a feeling that I've always chased the wrong dreams. I feel like time is running out, but my motivation is getting lower and lower. I see what my peers have achieved and it pushes me even further to such an extent that I no longer want to try and no longer feel fit in society. Sometimes I just want to buy drugs on the street to forget, get lost, stop trying. I am stuck in a life that I no longer see the meaning of. I want to start life anew.