I’ve had this problem for as long as I can remember. It’s one of the hardest obstacles I’ve yet to overcome. 

I can’t STAND if someone has ill feelings towards me or if I’m say, arguing with a friend/bf and they vent about me to someone else only assuming they are painting a terrible picture of me. I feel like I’m melting away when this happens. I don’t only get jealous of whoever the other parties are communicating with, but I have this unexplainable sinking feeling like everyone will hate me and I can’t go on. 

I’ve even taken it to levels where I reach out to people in on relation to the situation and start acting weird in some fucked up attempt to save my relationship with whoever when nothing needs saving.

It takes so much effort to convince myself otherwise when I’m in these moments... then when everything has cooled down and my relationships seem normal I feel embarrassed and like the biggest asshole for even thinking this way.