For years every time I look in the mirror I am disgusted. I hate everything about my face, I have terrible skin, I never think my hair looks good. Then I start hitting myself with the hairbrush because I think I’m so ugly (like what where’s the connection??) and then the drinking starts. I’m so hideous might as well drink and make my face even more bloated. I’m so self aware of my thoughts but I can’t stop the harmful behaviors