Aside from being insulted, belittled or made fun of by my parents, nothing bad has really happened to me. I feel like I behave in ways that would only make sense if worse things had happened.

I’ve been depressed for a decade now, hate being around people, avoid any potential friends or close relationships, hate when I’m physically close to people let alone being touched, awful short term memory, generally always confused about everything etc.

I don’t know why I do any of these things and neither do doctors, apparently. Is it weird to wish worse things happened to me?