Alongside anxiety, I have avoidant personality disorder. I have been skipping classes and have to force myself to go to work. When I'm out in public, I feel like I have a mask on. I'm not really myself. I tell people what I think they want to hear even if it harms me. 

I feel hopeless at this point, and have looked at career paths where I could work from home. 

I hate that these disorders are impacting my life so severely, but I'm not sure what I can do at this point. I tried residential psych treatment, partial hospitalization programs, cbt, dbt, and meds. I have an ESA, but she can't go out with me as she isn't a service animal. And I don't need a service animal.

I just want my life to be normal, but it feels like any dream at a normal life is lost and long gone.

Does anyone have any ideas or suggestions? I am open to everything.