For a good chunk of my life I've had anxiety of loud noises, especially sudden ones with a low frequency (thunder, fireworks, super heavy bass, etc). However I've found that ANY sort of low frequency noise, especially sudden impact noise, can make me almost emotionally violent and it takes every ounce of me not to kill whoever/whatever is making it. 

At first I thought I had hyperacusis (super sensitive hearing), but it was ruled out at the audiologist because I wasn't experiencing discomfort typical for someone with that disorder during the test. He said that what I was experiencing was definitely psychological, since it immediately invokes a stress reaction and only has certain sound triggers. Okay, definitely makes sense. 

I've had horrible experiences with impact noise specifically coming from children. I somehow twice in a row have ended up in apartments either next to or below children under the age of 7. The noise doesn't bother my fiancée all that much, but it sometimes drives me so insane that I have to take a benzo to calm down, and even then I'm still on edge. 

I was advised by the audiologist to use noise canceling headphones/earplugs as little as humanly possible, because it can make these phobic reactions worse. There's nothing we can do really to minimize the noise - the kid who runs around in the apartment next to us is on the spectrum and even the parents have a hard time controlling him, and since we share floorboards with them underneath the carpet, we feel and hear everything. The building is old and insulates poorly, so even walking sometimes makes a huge noise because of those stupid floorboards. 

So I guess my question is, does anyone have this kind of phobia and have found a way to treat it effectively?