I’ve given up on life. I’ve been suicidal and even that doesn’t feel like it’s something worth caring about. I can let go on depressants and care about nothing. They probably think I’m still smoking weed but my mind is so tired its like I can’t get high anymore. 

My family keeps asking me what’s up and acting concerned and I want them to stop, but, how can they? Every time they see me now I’m sedated, and if I’m not Imm disassociating and so I’m still unavailable. 

I must give off the impression that I want nothing do do with them because whenever they ask about something in my life I get irritated and annoyed at them for not knowing anything about the things I enjoy. I used to be a stoner. At least that was better, at least I would socialize.


Now I’m just always sedated, not talking, lying down, acting limp, lost in my head, not even thinking, like an animal, and only performing basic functions.