I'm not here for relationship advice. Just needed to vent. 

I'm an EMT in a big city, just left my job about a week ago due to extreme stress and burnout. I worked 24 hour shifts twice a week, and we would rarely get to sleep at all. The Healthcare system is collapsing. So many problems. I couldn't begin to fix any of them. So much horrible neglect and disgusting treatment of people. I have nightmares about some of my patients. I keep dreaming in stuck in this hoarder house we went in once, with all these dead cats. Those poor kitties. Poor people. Too much sadness. I couldn't work another second. I had to leave. I needed rest. I don't know if I'll go back. 

On top of that there's my boyfriend's bullshit. He flirts with girls online and deletes half of the conversations. Or he just uses snap. I'm assuming it's worse than that, based on how he tries to cover his tracks. I assume he's sexting at the very least. I don't understand how he could do that to me. I give him everything he needs in bed. My sex drive is higher than his. I have a normal amount of self esteem and I know I'm a great girlfriend. We got in a bad fight about it and he said he'd stop. He keeps saying we'll be okay. I don't believe him. 

My mom just started chemo again. My Dad is drinking himself to death. I have one friend and she's moving out of state. And I just came from the dentist, I am in a lot of pain because apparently I need 3 root canals. My insurance won't cover it because the company I worked for was fucking garbage. Nobody gives a fuck about EMS. I feel like nobody gives a fuck about me. 

Just down in my dark pit with the rest of you all. Wishing I could just sleep forever. Some of the worst days I've had in a long time.