 Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and it’s sucked every second so far, it probably isn't going to get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.   
someone posted this in a comment of a video,I've never really been suicidal,I just wanted my death,I was hoping a car would hit me everytime i walked across a pedestrian crossing,and I still do altough I really thought i got better the past few months,and I believe I did get better,but I still feel just as much like crap,I guess there also must be some getting used to.