I know no one here can diagnose me and I'm not looking for a diagnosis but would like your input.  

Whenever I start thinking about my stay at an acute psych ward (in 2017, I admitted myself willingly), I feel nauseous and shaken and on the verge of tears.    
 

Now, no one there *abused* me but I felt horrible and I spent 2 weeks out of the 3 I stayed there crying and suicidal (because I felt if something that was last resort help was so hellish, then it meant there was no escaping the suffering).  

 It was things like feeling trapped because you could not get away from other people (I have social anxiety), no activities whatsoever (beside jigsaw puzzle, TV, books, and walking up and down the corridor), no access to the outside world (not even short walks accompanied by whoever was visiting me, I was not deemed well enough), the fact the women's toilet would be locked up during the night and you could only use the men's restroom (which you could not lock yourself in, once a male patient walked in on me by accident), the fact we were treated like children by the staff (for example, whenever the doctors were doing the ward round, there was a nurse who would go around checking our rooms and would reprimand us when the beds weren't made neatly enough for her to be satisfied or there were things on our nightstands), the fact I was stripped of some of my belongings (like a phone) and monitored.      

I feel silly because those are such small things to be affected by. I feel like a spoilt child and it's hard to explain why it felt like a prison.  