I have had a very long and confusing mental health journey for many years now. However, since I'm finally an adult my doctors are taking me more seriously. I also got completely new doctors that are taking the time to really help me. I have over the past few years tried to figure out what was wrong with me, or why I feel the way I do, why my life was so confusing and unstable, etc. I've done extensive research as well. I have done research on BPD and It explains a lot of what I've been trying to identify and explain to my specialists. Can anyone give me insight on if this is worth mentioning to my new therapist? Really needing guidance because I feel lost.

&amp;#x200B;

My case has been described as 'complex' before and has been hard to treat and properly identify. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder/Panic Disorder, ADHD, clinical depression, and body dysmorphia. I am on medication for all (Effexor and Vyvanse) I thought I would be a lot better after discovering I had ADHD just a year ago, and being medicated helped, but I'm still really struggling. Primarily with self identify, mood swings, intense moods, trust issues, and more.

To give backstory, I have been through multiple instances of childhood trauma, sexual harassment and mental/emotional abuse.

I find that I have a massive fear of abandonment, so much to the point that I keep everyone around even if they are bad for me. If I feel someone is going to leave me or is fading from me, It sends me down a dark path and I often manipulate in some way to make sure they stay. I also find that I manipulate others to feel empathy for me, because I feel that my issues are never enough to receive empathy. My moods also change drastically and quickly, and they can last hours, days or weeks. The moods range from severe depression, anger/irritability, or happiness/a feeling of invincibility or 'on top of the world'. It changes very quickly and sometimes I can sometimes sense when it's changing but I can't do anything about it. I find that my mood changes when something 'triggering' happens or something very very small that sets me off, or It happens randomly. 

I also have a very poor sense of identity. I change my interests a lot, including career or basic likes and dislikes. I genuinely don't have a sense of who I truly am, my strengths, my weaknesses, my personality, anything. It's always ever-changing. Which leads me into the issue of masking, where I tend to take on others personalities when I'm with them and I don't realize I do. I also have trust issues and issues with peoples intentions. One day I think I'm really close with someone and they're a good friend to me, the next minute I may think they absolutely hate me, or the next I think they're against me with bad intentions and terrible people. It makes it difficult for relationships and friendships. It has affected them because of my constant change in mood, perceptions, etc.

I hope someone took time to read this, I know it's a lot but I need insight...