I feel pain when I’m drunk too but it’s a different kind of pain when I’m sober because I’m forced to confront the fact that this is my reality. This is my default state when no other substances are affecting me. Emotional pain is 1000x worse than physical pain for me. And just knowing that my default state is constant pain fucks with me to no end. I wish it was like stubbing your toe because at least I know the exact cause and eventually the pain will subside. But this shit is so much worse. I feel it all over my body. It’s like gravity is working twice as hard. Like an invisible force is crushing me from all directions. Being sober is pain.