I am an extremely jealous, insecure, obsessive, controlling, emotionally dependent and paranoid person. I have a healthy relationship, my boyfriend doesn't give me any reason to be this way, but I have rejection and abandonment traumas, a dysfunctional family and bad relationships.

I was recently diagnosed with bipolar type 2 and I've been taking medication, which has helped a lot and pulled me out of a horrible episode of depression. (aripiprazole 5mg, lexapro 10mg and 600mg lithium).

However, there are problems that medication can't help me with and one of them is jealousy. It makes me suffer too much. I'm 90% sure my boyfriend wouldn't cheat on me, there's no reason for him to lie, but even so, there are moments or days (like today and now) that I just can't help but create countless paranoia.

I have intrusive thoughts that my boyfriend is leaving or cheating on me, and I dream about it EVERY night. It hurts me a lot and messes up my relationship.

I have researched about morbid jealousy and bipolarity, but I don't know if they are related, if bipolarity increases jealousy or paranoia. I know I get worse when I'm in an episode of hypomania or depression, but my jealousy and paranoia don't just show up in those episodes.

I do therapy (psychoanalysis), but I don't feel that I have improved.

Some examples of how my head works:  
\- My boyfriend sent me a photo that I swore was an old photo so I thought he wasn't actually at home like he said and sent me the photo to fool me. (I later confirmed that the photo was not an old one and that I was being unreasonable)  
\- Today he went to bed early and in my head this is a lie and he is cheating on me  
\- I had to delete my instagram account to stop watching his profile, because any woman who liked his photos I was already triggered.  
\- Sometimes I see a beautiful woman and I am immediately jealous of the possibility that he would be interested in her.

Again, there's no reason for me to think so, but I can't help it. I don't want to be like that, it gets in the way of my whole life. My boyfriend knows all my problems and is extremely understanding, I have nothing to complain about, we talk a lot. Medicines have also helped me with paranoia, but there are times, like now, when I suffer a lot.

There are days when it's so strong that I think every word that comes out of my boyfriend's mouth is a lie, when I don't know what's real or not when we talk. That I don't know if I really know him. I feel very alone in these moments, as if there is a barrier that prevents me from trusting him.

I would like some advice or just a few words from someone who has gone through the same thing. I have hobbies and I study, I exercise, I follow the entire cake recipe, before they tell me to. I am 23F.

&amp;#x200B;

PS: Sorry for the English, it's not my native language