i have said this before, so i’m sorry. but it’s just such a constant feeling. i hate feeling so pissed off and uninterested all the time. i have no interest in anything. well i do, but no interest on acting on anything. i want to cry. i want to scream. i want to go out. i want to get in a fight with my parents over some stupid shit. i want to smile. i want to laugh. i want to be fucking normal. it’s so draining. this is not how i’m supposed to live, defined by my mental illnesses. so what, maybe i’m not getting in trouble or pissing people off or fucking up my life, but isn’t that just part of growing up?? anybody else who fucks up just gets in trouble or some shit but when i do it’s instantly because of my mental illnesses? i want to be treated like everyone else, that includes me only being my mental illness and it also includes everyone avoiding me or treating me like shit because of it.