My parents know I used to sh, they caught me multiple times.  But they confronted me once and then never mentioned it again.  They also know how depressed and anxious I have been my entire life.  I’ve just gotten better at hiding it.  They still don’t do anything.  They never brought me to therapy (we could afford it) despite having breakdowns every goddamned morning.  

My sister found out I am suicidal and sh.  She didn’t do anything.  She made it about how selfish I am and about her.  She still makes sh jokes around me, it feels like she’s prodding me.  She asks about my deepest secrets and seems amused when I lie.  Am I just entertainment for her?

My friends knew how bad I was doing.  Yet no one cared, they all distanced themselves.  

My teachers saw me have breakdowns in class.  They didn’t do anything.  Didn’t even pull me aside or call me back.  They just made my grades lower.  

Everyone knows I struggle every single day.  Yet no one cares.  

All I’ve ever wanted was for someone to notice.  And I’ve realized that everyone does notice that I struggle and am not normal.  They just don’t care. I think that’s worse than everyone just being oblivious.