I was diagnosed just recently @ 38. I'm a "quiet" borderline. Only after I was diagnosed did I realise that I had this physical pit of emptiness in my chest. 

The reason I didn't know was because I was always trying to frantically fill it and I would never sit and "be in my body". It was there though - I'd often say to my partner "I'm hungry or something" and I would smoke, or drink, or eat etc etc

Now that I know what it is, it is maddening. I've googled the research, but it seems to be a very fuzzy concept that has not been studied much. 

I'm trying to make friends with it and make room for it. It's easier some days, harder on others.

But I'm curious about other people's experiences. Does it ever goes away? How did you do it?