I got diagnosed at 31.. I'm now 33 and went through a very tough 10 months of DBT. And 10 mins now daily of personal/relax work. I no longer have "dissacocation" and my thoughts have gone from suicidal to "hopeful" for the future. It scares me. All I've known is turmoil, and chaos and suicidal thoughts... And I want to go back to it :( but my brain is fighting in "stay alive mode" it's such a struggle. Does anyone else feel like this after DBT? I feel like I don't deserve happiness, and should be in pain forever. I'm so confused. 