Hey, first time I'm posting on reddit. Sorry for my english, I'm french !

So, my life is not easy. I have beeen suffering from ED for 14 years now, harassment for 7 years (before my ED started). And then multiple depressive episode... 

Last year I started drinking way too much alcohol alone with sometimes a lot of pills, dr\*gs. I stopped everything for 8 months. I'm proud. But, I'm sad, I'm alone. I have no friend.

 My dad died 2 years ago, my mother and my brother don't want me to go out, to have fun (even I'm living alone now), they call me every hour to know where I am, what I am doing. I have no other family members. 

**abstract of my life** : working out excessively, spending a lot of money on designer things (I know it's useless, I need people no clothes or bag), couting my calories, doing my 5000K steps a day, sleeping every night by 9pm, taking pills on weekend to sleep all the day and working in a toxic workplace.

otherwise, I have a major degree in graphic design, I love fashion and design, working out, create things... But I think I really need a few people in my life. 

My post have no sense. But IDK, maybe you'll have some opinion, some ideas ?