Now I’ll start off by saying I’m not brave enough to ever off myself, I couldn’t do that to my mom since I just lost my brother 3 days ago. 
But as I lay here I’m 22 years old living in the buttfuck know where.
I have no friends, I hate going out in public I’ve been missing work just laying in my bed all day, 
Just coming off a 2 day bender had the worst hangover days of my life. 
My room is the pinnacle of depression, 
Empty fast food bags spilled liquor just trash everywhere my clothes all on the bed and floor. Currently just looking for an out and that out I keep thinking about is death. It’s just so easy and accessible but I can’t and will not do it for the sake of my mom and my roommates. These 3 people are the ones that really are holding me down and not causing me to go insane. 
I hope life picks up and I can move away but I’m broke living in a shit hole 
And I’m almost certain my body is slowly wasting away from all the years of heavy drinking.