I feel like it’s 50/50

Sometimes if I push myself to go I actually have a surprisingly good time and think thank god I didn’t let the anxiety get the better of me 

Sometimes I push myself to go and it’s just a tedious uncomfortable ordeal until I end up leaving early 

I suppose given the above it’s probably worth going ahead and trying to turn the anxiety into anticipation 

But sometimes I think nah absolutely fuck this, but always week quite guilty about it when I stay home 

What do you guys do?