I know you will say there's reasons to keep going but really I've been so lonely for like 10 years now Maybe after high school actually. I'm 35 now. Married with kids under 8yrs. Hubby is great. I'm socially awkward. Had a few friends here and there in life. None stuck around. So isolated, especially in the pandemic. I haven't worked in a long time. I always had and have been shy. I can't make friends easily. I feel like I'll never have any job. Not that I'm looking for one because my youngest is not in school yet. I'm not looking forward to that 9 to 5 work life and then coming home to take care of things home and help with homework. I'm just not motivated in life at all. I know my kids should motivate me but I'm no one.. I doubt I'd be a good example for my kids to look up to. There's some really bad hurts from my family. I just have my mom and she doesn't get me at all and is very hard to talk to. I feel like if I left, my hubby could raise the kids with his beloved family. He has 2 sisters so that's plenty of females to look up to for my daughters. I just feel so useless. I'm approaching the age where I'm not longer desirable in society. My little ones are growing and won't need me anymore.   Once theyre grown out of the house. It'll be just hubby and I. That scares me. I have no friends that have watched my kids grow...or been in that part of my life. I have no relatives really. I'm going to be old with no one around. My hubby has his siblings cousins etc. this has been my worry for long time. You don't understand how lonely I am and feel.