Pain stops my ruminating. It just distracts so well. Until it soothes and i have to do it again. It started with jist pinching and slapping, but today i accidently (honestly it was an accident) burned myself and tonight im actually thankful for the burn, i keep touching it and the pain is sharp and seems to take the edge off my depression for a short while. I feel worried that ill start self harming more to get the relief