Sorry I know this is so pathetic &amp; sad but so am I. 

Whenever I see couples or hear about romance, etc, in real life or even in movies / shows, ialways get real depressed &amp; insecure. 

I rarely even watch movies or shows cause sex &amp; romance is everywhere &amp; i always compare myself to other girls (&amp; why am i here if i am so ugly and unlovable 🥲). 

And whenever there are romance or sex scenes on tv / any mentions of sex anywhere, or whenever I see couples anywhere i cant help but feel really jealous &amp; sad. 

I want to have a boyfriend, sex, all of that really bad. I just want to be important and special to someone. I want someone to like me. Just want to mean something to somebody. 

But i know i will never have that - sex or a relationship or even a chance of a guy liking me. 

I am not worth for anyone to love me cause I am the most repulsive, ugly, girl i have ever seen - i dont even feel like a real girl cause i am so ugly and disgusting looking. And thats why it makes me depressed. 

I am 18 in only a few days, never had a boyfriend/never been on a date, still a virgin (obviously), never been asked out, no one has ever liked me or has a crush on me, never even had a kiss yet. 

Might not sound like much but it makes me feel worthless &amp; pathetic &amp; embrassed. 

I cant try out dating apps either cause thats just asking to be laughed at, I am beyond ugly. I dont even look like a girl. I look like a corpse. 

My body is awful &amp; disgusting, my face is beyond hideous. I saw myself in the mirror before and couldnt stop crying. 

My personality is so awkward and boring too, my voice is also horrendous. I sound and look like a boy. 

I dont know no one could ever like or even love me. 

And all the guys i have had crushes on chose other prettier girls every time (every girl is prettier than me though so thats not that hard, &amp; dont know why i am still surpised, why would anyone want to even go near me when I look this repulsive, disgusting and hideous). 

I hate every part of my face. I hate every part of my body too. i am just so ugly and horrendous looking. I legit look really scary. I look dead. Dont know how anyone could look this bad.