Like the title says, maybe this is the wrong place but I wanted to see if maybe someone could give me some advice.

I wanted to book an appointment with my therapist but he said he was only available on the 17th so now I'm here. All of my thoughts have come to a boiling point, I've never had much of a passion for anything hence why I sit around saying I'll look into a college but never do so I don't worry my parents. I have a younger sister who I got in a major fight with recently because she constantly talks down to me and the rest of my family and I'm so fucking stressed about that no matter what I say to her she refuses to change. I told my mom about how shitty I've been feeling recently and now I'm fucking beating myself up about it because I stressed her out again like an asshole. I fucking hate my school because I don't have any connections in or outside of school to make it more bearable aside from a select few people who will ask me to hang out every few months and then never talk to me again.

I've tried things like antidepressants but for the year I was on them for they just numbed my emotions so much I couldn't even get myself to tear up. I'm even reluctant to see my therapist I booked an appointment with recently because while it helps to talk to him it's only temporary and he gives me advice that I know I should take but never do.

If someone could even just talk with me that would be a big help, thank you.