I completely blew up on my fp last night. I’ve been having really hard nights lately with regulating my emotions. She is usually there for me every night calming me down and just talking with me. Yesterday she didn’t respond from 5:30-9. I know that’s not an insane amount of time, but the thing is I know her routine and she constantly wears her apple watch. I got super angry and started spamming her with at least 10 phone calls, and about 15 texts asking her to pick up. I was having a super bad panic attack and all I wanted was her. She finally picked up around 9 and was just making excuses on why she wasn’t around, not apologizing at all for being MIA for hours. So i hung up on her and told her not to talk to be again. 

I know that i’m not her problem, but anyways the part that I need help with is: She hasn’t reached out once today which is super hard for me. I was testing her to see how much she values our friendship and I feel like she doesn’t care because she hasn’t even asked how i’m doing. 

Do I reach out or do I wait for her to reach out? I don’t know how long I can go without her.