As a male I never felt someone love me. I always felt girls saw me as a provider and not as a person. I always felt they would leave me if I had no money.

Lately I was lucky to land a great job and now I see I'm again attractive to some girls because of that. And I'm attracted to them because they are good looking mainly... Nothing else. So I'm superficial and selfish too.

Love seems like a total shit to me.

So I just want to have sex and be cuddled with someone I love. Because that's all I care. Because I don't believe in anything else. And repeat the same next day. Is it wrong? I can't see beyond that.

Everything I do in life is trying to get money for shelter, food, clothing, and sex. Nothing more than that.
