Just about every relationship that I get into my family tells me that I deserve better. I not only have BPD, I also have epilepsy. I’ve been fighting for disability for eight years due to where I live. Judge even put in documentation that my husband cares for me, he’s been dead almost six years. Anyways, so BPD, epilepsy and currently no income. When I meet someone who is interested in me I automatically cling to them, partially due to my BPD. No matter what red flags I see or how different we are. I’m just grateful that someone will look past my disability and have me. I never feel like I bring much to a relationship. I am a great mother, good housewife type and don’t cheat but, is that really enough? I find myself putting up with anything just to keep that person with me. I know that when I get my disability the money issue will be handled but, I also know that the other things won’t go away. I will never be “normal “. This makes me feel like I’m a burden on anyone who tries to come into my life. At the same time the loneliness consumes me. I don’t feel whole unless I have someone to care for. These feelings are just getting worse now that my son is about to graduate. The only good thing I have ever seen in myself is that I am a good mother. Does anyone else understand this? Just hoping I’m not alone in this situation.