a few minutes ago for me.

somebody on Twitter asked childless and single people, who would be their beneficiaries if they happened to die.

majority of the answers were siblings, parents, nephews/nieces... I also saw "a close friend", and "my boyfriend". but then it hit me.

I couldn’t think of anybody to be my beneficiary because I have no one. I’m lonely, as in completely socially isolated. for years.

and as much as I like to blame my mental illnesses and the environmental context I grew up in, I sort of digged my own hole.