Last year I was having racing thoughts and anxiety attacks. It made it hard to go to school or sleep.

This year, it's hard for me to pay attention in class. I get bored easily. I feel like I have to be on my phone 24/7 just to make it through the day.

I also get overwhelmed with suicidal thoughts. They are passive not active. I feel like no one takes me seriously. I would wish this in my worst enemy. The thoughts weigh me down. I think they also make me excited? It's a complex feeling.

Later this week, hopefully I will finally address my anxiety with my new therapist. 

I'm also experiencing apathy and anhedonia. My old hobbies don't make me happy. I'm unmotivated to do things if I have something to do later in the morning or afternoon. It's strange. My friend who has ADHD says that's a symptom.

Go figure.

I can't even read stories, or long article for class. Forget watching TV, Netflix or Movies.

I'm so bored.

Any suggestions?