Simply gathering up the energy to do anything feels like a struggle. I hate working, I hate thinking, I hate having to make dinner or do laundry. It feels like most of the time just getting up in the morning is hard. I'm constantly fighting myself just to get some work done, but then I work for five to ten minutes and have to take a break only to scroll Reddit or Twitter and not enjoy that either. Most of the time I wish I was just laying in bed or sitting in a chair and staring at the wall. I'm only 34, but I recognize the pointlessness of all of this and that just drags me further down. Why should I push myself when all any of this leads to is death anyway? Why is dying in 50 years somehow better than tomorrow?