I am tired of the fights and everything else that comes with BPD. She doesn't want to get therapy and after a decade I am tired of trying. I know children will make it worse for both of us so I want to move on. It really hurts me a lot to break up the relationship as I do love her. She also loves me, but I can't cope with her illness. I have a lot of reasons to be *very* angry for everything she has done. I am not angry, I understand that it is harder for her than it is for me. 

I will be okay, I have always been okay. I don't mind stress. She has threatened me already in the case we break up. I am not worried and anything she does I can deal with the fall out. Anything she does, I know will come from her illness and I will not retaliate. That said, I am not going to let her destroy my life either I will be setting firm boundaries, going no contact, getting a restraining order if necessary.  

What are some steps I can take to make it easier for her? I still love her and I am willing to forgo any comforts for myself during the breakup that are not absolute boundaries. 

I appreciate any detailed and specific advice this sub has to give.