I’m pretty sure I met my person, but Im not doing the expectations or grandiose thinking, I’m not going to propose after 3 dates, and I’m not going to try and hang out nonstop for a month until we have a blowout. (None of this is me stereotyping, these are all things I’ve done).

The benefits of being over 30 with experience in heavy DBT.

Her late husband unfortunately passed because of suicide. Then, as happens to some very sweet, caring people, she met a man who seemed incredibly passionate and proposed after 2 weeks. She started to shift her life to be with him and he started acting strangely. 2 weeks later: he was diagnosed BPD. He then went full tilt BPD, screaming at her to F off then calling her apologizing for everything, then when she was apprehensive, he threatened suicide (which was incredibly traumatic given her husband had killed himself). She took him back a last time with the condition he not threaten suicide. He agreed. Then, shortly after, called her on her birthday to tell her that he was going to kill himself and how and hung up on her. She thought he was dead for 24 hours. He called to apologize and she blocked him.

I’m the first person she has gone on a date with since then. 

Telling her I’m Bipolar 1 and BPD (mostly in remission thanks to heavy, heavy DBT) after that really wasn’t hard, I just told her about how sorry I was all that happened and I promised I have gotten help and I’m medicated and stable.

So, I’m holding her hand and comforting her and a random older gentleman walks up to our table and says, “Miss, I don’t mean to bother you, but, I can see that this man loves you.”

I hugged him, she and I laughed.

Then we ordered spinach artichoke dip and laughed about goth bands we use to like.

Epic sh*t.