We were kissing and kissing ramdomly triggered childhood abuse and I almost instantly became psychotic. I was crying disoriented for hours untill I calmed down and my boyfriend just kept hugging me hard, reminding me that I was loved.

I felt deeply ashamed and he told me "hey anon, don't be ashamed. You never told me your childhood was that painful to you. But knowing each other intimately means knowing this, and I love you the same. Cheers, we are not married (being sarcastic here to make me giggle, gay marriage is illegal here) but we live like a married couple. I love you".

That calmed me down and I love this person. He is sleeping next to me. Coming out as a bisexual man has been stressful for me too. Not used to expect fear from being in public like this. Not being a straight man is dangerous in my conservative country. Harassment and abuse towards "gay men" is encouraged everywhere as a joke here, even on local TV. This sucks. Feeling the need to get high on opiates again (and liquor and another heavy downer at the same time).