I struggle with suicidal thoughts. It’s been better for a little while but the past two weeks it’s been getting bad again. It’s like even the littlest thing happens and my automatic response is to think about my inevitable death and how I want death now.

I got a girlfriend recently and I can’t help my thoughts alternating between “she is so good, she doesn’t deserve to deal with someone like me” and thoughts questioning whether or not it’s working out.

My mind is so screwed up, I ruin everything. Even the best thing to ever happen to me, and it only just started.

It’s like the most common thought in my head, the thought that’s the most standard in my mind, is just thinking “I want to die/ I should be dead”.