I am currently in a relationship with this fantastic girl, I love her, but my brain just doesn't allow me to happy with her. I don't know what to do I feel she knows somethings wrong. I want to be with her but I just mentally unable to. I haven't really been close to anyone my whole life including family, my mom abandon me when I was young, and, my father doesn't talk to me, and all my uncle's and cousins I feel hate me. But I've always wanted someone to be close to, I've wanted this more than anything, but everytime I do I get unhappy and depressed. I'm in corner right now I need help, talking to shrinks is out of the question I don't want to go on pills sacrifing who I am for someone in not. I really need help soon, I don't want to continue my life alone and depressed.