**SLIGHT RANT:** I've seen quite a few therapists over the years and, as is often with BPD'ers, they didn't stick. As an example, there's a reputation of dropping therapists due to black/white thinking - one day  we think our therapist is great, another day they're the pits. In my case, more often than not, therapists have made it subtle or blatant that borderline patients are difficult. In a couple of first-time sessions, I'm mandated to purchase a workbook and given an ultimatum to stick to the homework or don't come at all. Other therapists started out nice but quickly lost trust in what I said in sessions - they start to believe I minimize or manipulate what is said in therapy. They started to assume the worst and I constantly had to convince them my emotions/behavior were the opposite. I've often left therapists feeling more hopeless about myself than better. 



My current therapist seemed like a true advocate the first two months and was open to different approaches/philosophies. Last week during our first phone session, I spoke for the first time in my life how I disassociate when I'm very depressed. It was a breakthrough for me and I was feeling positive about our next session. Unfortunately, she now feels she is under-qualified to treat me and started assuming my emotions are more angry, moody, volatile that I claim. A lot of what I had stated previously in therapy was now being re-evaluated as possible minimizing and my overall commitment to therapy was questioned. It felt like the two months of trust-building and safe sessions just *evaporated*. She may refer me to a government subsidized treatment center for more intensive treatment. It's all very disappointing since I exhibit very few "extreme" BPD traits. I'm in a stable, happy relationship for 3+ years but too depressed to work or socialize.  



If the people who we seek to treat our BPD ostracize us, how can we build the strength and tools to recover?   