Feel like shit because of this. Mom has been making a slow death for years but it's finally looking like the christmas is going to be without her. She always made sure to give many presents so that there's more to unwrap. Yet, the life has made her to suffer all these years. The alcoholic person who's past self I barely remember as my father is making things all so much worse. She's the last one to deserve this faith.

I believe it's better for her when she finally gets to rest. But unsure what's gonna happen to me? Will I find any relief knowing she doesn't need to suffer on this cruel world anymore or will I find myself mourning and sad even more when she isn't around? Does anyone have experience on this and tell about it? This shit is already so unbearable for me.