Idk what I’m looking to gain out of this post tbh but I just want help. I’ve always been an anxious person, but I don’t know whether if what I’ve been dealing with is anxiety anymore. 

I go through periods, up to several days of just feeling horrible. I am mean to the people close to my life, then have to make up for it later. It’s like an ongoing cycle and I hate it. I cry until it hurts, I feel like a failure, lose motivation, and absolutely cannot trust what anybody says about trying to help me. Then, these feelings suddenly disappear and I feel normal again. I can tell these episodes have a negative effect on those around me and I’m afraid it will lead to me pushing everyone away, a decision which I will regret when I am “normal.”

I’ve been trying to figure out if these are triggered by anything in particular, but they seem very spontaneous and usually start with not feeling like enough. 

I am willing to answer questions and any help is appreciated ❤️