I feel so awful, me and my fp were drinking (stupid of me) and every other time I've been drinking with them we've had a great time, until last night. We started out fine, having a laugh and generally a good time. Then we argued, and the vibe changed, had a full out fight, and I ended up self harming. I hate how quickly I become self destructive, especially when I've been drinking, I feel so guilty but I'm also in so much pain rn, I fucking hate myself, all I want to do is dissociate and never speak to anyone again :((