I went off my olanzapine 5 weeks ago and everything was great at the start, more energy, sleeping reasonable hours, motivated and generally just feeling alive. However over the last week things have started spiralling and I'm getting real worried.

I've only been sleeping 4 or 5 hours a night, I have boundless energy and I've been spending way more than I normally do. My symptoms have returned, the voices are back, I'm having intense paranoia that there are people trying to steal my thoughts. I'm having grandiose delusions that I'm in contact with aliens and I've started working on creating a new language to communicate with them.

I've not been to work in 3 days because I'm terrified my coworkers are trying to steal my thoughts, thoughts are meant to be private but I feel like my privacy is being violated every time I step outside my apartment. I'm even paranoid my therapist is conspiring against me and I no longer trust her.

I've even started carrying a knife with me when I do HAVE to go outside in case I get attacked. Thankfully I still have insight to know this is happening because of my illness but it doesn't make them feel any less real.

I think it's time I contact my psychiatrist and go back on the olanzapine... I tried to fight by myself and lost 😭

scz : 3

me: 0

Fuck this shit.