So my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me last night. He says he needs to travel and see the world alone. He says that he loves me and he cried the whole time but that this is something he needs to do. We’re currently in a kind of shitty living situation and he’s been pretty isolated without a car. Also I’ve been very needy and demanding and he basically sees only me. But he never communicated a need for space. He withholds his feelings from me out of fear of hurting me.
We cried and didn’t sleep all night and talked about our plans moving forward. He ended up sort of back pedaling and saying that he thinks he needs to just go on a solo trip for a few weeks and that we can still be together. I’m worried that this will ultimately end in us breaking up but in a more long and drawn out painful way. Thinking of living without him makes me feel like my chest is cracked open. It makes me not care about anything else in my life and makes me want to do anything to keep him with me. But part of me feels like if we just broke up I would be in incredible pain for a little while but maybe it would be better in the long run? But my emotional brain wants to drop everything in my life for travel with him and work hard on being independent and being able to give him space. I’m at such a loss and I don’t know what to do. 