Every day I wish bad things will happen to me. I genuinely need to be hurt, tortured, abused, bullied, hated. 

I always wish/fantasize/daydream 
about the worst most horrible things to happening to me all day everyday. 

Like getting hit by a car, being stabbed/beaten up, breaking bones, being abused &amp; r*ped &amp; tortured, being bullied &amp; kidnapped &amp; attacked, getting into fatal accidents, anything that hurts/causes pain &amp; trauma.  

Really I should suffer the worst pain &amp; worst things imaginable. 

Its not like I enjoy pain but I feel I deserve it because of how I lash out on others, they dont deserve it of course. 

I need to be treated like shit. I am just a worthless piece of shit. I dont deserve to be alive or to be happy.

Lowkey wish someone would hurt me &amp; kill me. I deserve to die &amp; be killed &amp; tortued in the most guresome, painful, drawn-out, horrific, way.

I hate myself so much for how I have treated other people. 
I really dont desvere to live, trust me when I say, I really am a horrible unstable disgusting person. 
 
In the past I have blown up on everyone around me (as in as recently as a few months ago, i blew up again). I hate myself so much. I am so fucking disgusting and repulsive. I have ruined every relationship I have. Anger issues &amp; lashing out over nothing. As in physcial fights with people close to me. All I do is make people miserable so why should I be happy? Exactly I shouldnt.

NO this is NOT a joke edgy troll post. &amp; If you say that I will block  you. 

Posted similar rant the other day but everyone just thought i was being edgy. No i am not. Just a rant/vent. 


 

 