tw// su1cide, self-h4rm, cursing. 

nothing in life is good. nothing. sure, some small parts where someone im friends with makes a joke i laugh. but at the same time while laughing i know its not gonna be funny in a couple of minutes. and i have that thought all day everyday. nothing is good. nothing is fun. i feel empty. i cut my wrist just to feel something, as relief, or just because i hate myself and my stupid body. im 16 years old. everyday is the same, nothing ever changes, and if it does i quickly get used to it and complain anyway. i have NO motivation. ABSOLUTE ZERO motivation for anything except for thinking or encouraging myself to kill myself. im looked at as lazy, slow and what not. meanwhile im just un-motivated. if i say that to my parents or friends they’ll just say something like ”its because u have no hobby” ”u dont do anything about it anyway” ”it doesnt matter, just do it”.

i cant, i dont want to, i feel like i dont have to. just because u tell me to, i wont do it. im tired.
i feel like a slave, working on school-stuff just to get into job-stuff, and for what? just to drag out the years until i die. everyday day’ll be the same as any other day. bored, tired, anxious, unmotivated, having to wake up. fucking kill me please.