I don't know if I'm normal anymore, it makes me sick for the actions I've done. Since I was a kid, I've always doing stupid and dumb things like when someone ordered me to find specific things, I always missed them and saying I can't find it anywhere but in reality it has always been there and they're always saying to me that those things are like a snake that is ready to bite me coz It's already in front of me but I still can't see it, my mind is really having a bad time to search for things. One more example when there's an activity in our school, it's origami making and my teacher instructs us while she's on the front but I'm just the only one who can't follow and was called a slow learner that time by my teacher, I've became a laughingstock that day and just smiled like a sign of nervousness and shame. This is probably one of the roots of my anxiety and makes me always feel down when I think of it.

 I'm afraid that in the future I'm still like this especially when i get my job and do stupid mistakes again. Tired of living with this.