Fluid identity is a problem for me, as maybe for many of you. Or maybe this is not my BPD, but I'll write this post anyway.

I often feel I cannot integrate all parts of myself into one, but they are different roles and shards of me, and they can be highly exaggerated. I feel this is a way of coping, something that gives me strength and see myself as someone who is valuable and lovable, also it helps me not to feel empty (if I concentrate on how I should act like, feel like, think like, I am not just 'being'). And everytime I find a stereotyped version of a part of me, I feel like I just found out who I was. 'Yes, this is definitely me, why I didn't see it before.' Then poof, it just disappears.

I started to behave and act based on what feels natural, and not what it says about my identity. Obviously by acting what feels natural, I didn't mean exploding buildings or murdering puppies, so let me tell an example. When I feel I am pretty talkative that day, or what would make me feel good and would feel like a natural act in a situation is telling jokes, I tell jokes. If I wouldn't do this it would be like 'I am a serious person, I don't tell jokes, I am someone who is just not a joking person, I am a melancholic, sensitive person who reads Kafka and suffers a lot, I am artsy, etc." You can see this is not a natural process, but something that is a creation of my mind, determined by stereotypes. But this joking could also go wrong, if I'll 'change character' and start to act  on this whole 'I am such a funny person, a true clown, I am always so happy and cheeky, and etc.'. So basically, what I do now, is act against any stereotypes or roles in my mind, and do what comes naturally, or when I go into a role, do the exact opposite.

I think also an important factor is not to THINK about who you are, what should you be like, what is your true self etc., but just do things, experience things, and try to let yourself in a flow like state, so you can naturally see what do you like, don't like, etc.

This might won't work for you, and maybe this is not my BPD, and I am just a nutcase, but I am interested in, what do you do to feel yourself, well... yourself? How do you try to save your integrity, and not 'change personas'?