Right now I'm fairly calm but normally the rage always comes back until I had a fight with my boyfriend and let it all out on him, or until I let it out on myself, and sometimes that doesn't even stop me from still starting a fight. 
He knows something's up right now, and I had to resist the urge so hard. Please help me not fuck this up today. I just know the next goddamn tiny thing is going to make me flip.