So I’ve been having symptoms of schizophrenia since around age 15. My mom never got me help and just brushed it off and never wanted to talk about it. I suspected I had it for a while now especially because I have all the symptoms and mentioned it to a psychiatrist when I went to get evaluated for Autism and he suspected I have it too. (He just didn’t diagnosis me because 1. He doesn’t do that in his words and 2. I didn’t go there long enough) 

About two months ago I had a psychotic episode that has left me even worse then I was before. Now I have even more paranoia, harder time telling reality apart, have delusions that i cant shake and more hallucinations and voices almost daily. My brain just hasnt been the same either. I decided to get help as im scared and I know I need medication. I found out about my states FEP program so I contacted them and told them about my symptoms. They said they only allow people with diagnose to join but would make an exception due to my symptoms and previous psychiatrist suspecting schizophrenia. They said their nurse practitioners would give me a initial diagnosis and we’ll go from there. I’ve seen my counselor twice and she has been really nice and understanding and it has been hard talking about that stuff without triggering voices etc. The problem now is my nurse practitioner. I’ve only seen her once but i dont feel like she’s taking me serious. She constantly talked about social anxiety on my visit and prescribed me Zoloft as my first medication (that I stopped now after a week bc of side effects) which didn’t help me. When I saw her I had a better day then the day before and had a easier time talking to her which my husband said could’ve made her think that it wasn’t that bad or serious 

My counselor told me she was going to call me on Friday (last Friday) to tell me my diagnosis and schedule our next appointment to go over my treatment plan because she needed said diagnosis first but I never got the call. I called yesterday and when we asked about any updates she said my nurse practitioner will tell me on her next appointment (which was supposed to be the 18th) and we’ll see if we continue treatment. She asked if we wanted to schedule sooner with the nurse so we did for tomorrow. 

Im scared now that she diagnosed me with just social anxiety and ptsd and calls it quits. Apparently she even consulted a doctor but I believe she only told them her opinion. Idk what to do im going crazy this is not social anxiety, you dont hallucinate with social anxiety! I wasn’t even that anxious before or depressed im SCARED! Scared demons are after me or the government but they dont believe me! Idk what to do im at my wits end i cant afford anything else i cant work. Idk what to do