What I am wondering is do you ever feel secure in yourself? Do you ever feel different? I know I can do so much to manage it, to act kindly toward myself, to calm myself, to remind myself what others think doesn’t matter, but is the constant sense — not the words but the feeling deep down — like a constant sense of embarrassment from just existing, like I’m always in the wrong, always in trouble, always afraid and craving approval and reassurance from everyone all the time, yet humiliated and self loathing that I’m so greedy, just feeling so desperate for kindness and warmth and so unworthy of it at the same time — does that ever go away? 

It sounds more dramatic and sometimes it’s not as strong as others but it’s always there. Like an inner need and I just cannot fathom it will ever go away. I still experience happiness and joy and euphoria and curiosity and awe and all that and I can live without experiencing inner peace I think but I just want to know if it’s possible to heal that deep inner fear, anxiety and unworthiness? That sense of inadequacy and being below everyone else even though I know logically I’m not that special, it’s such a strong feeling in my life. I know I can manage my actions, I know about ACT, and it’s helped a lot. I’m just wondering if everyone feels this way and, if not, then if it’s possible to one day feel relatively secure at least like 50 percent of the time?