I struggle with BPD, and any little thing will set me over the edge. I think my mom might have BPD too. Yesterday, my mom made an appointment to get my nails done, but I overslept and I wasn’t able to make it. 

My mom got really upset when she got home. I had plans on going out with my friends, and she told me to change my dress because I wear it too much. She told me to wear these new pants I got. She saw the way I looked in them, and she told me to take them off. She told me that I’m too big to wear the pants. I started crying, and she told me to shut up. She then started saying how I don’t dress well, and that I’m lazy and that she worries about me. She was yelling and yelling. 

I feel like a failure. I don’t have friends, and my grades suck. I feel ugly and I just want to end my life. I feel so horrible. My mom then started being all nice texting me and calling me beautiful. This isn’t new. She did this all the time growing up; insulting me and then lovebombing me. Sometimes she’s nice to me, sometimes she buys me hundreds of dollars worth of clothes.