I'm a freshman at college, diagnosed with BPD at 17. I could never find something that I knew I enjoyed doing. Until I found theater, specifically acting. 

I dived in, I did 6 shows this year, with my sixth and final of freshman year next weekend.

I realized I didn't make a single solid friend. So I smoked my sixth cigarette of the day and put it out on my arm, right around where I used to cut. And it felt amazing.

But now I'm alone and I just want to die so fucking bad.