During the height of Covid, I moved back home after living in a large city for 6 1/2 years. I couldn’t take living in my small +550 sq foot apartment not being able to go anywhere. My parents were nice enough to let me stay home for about ten months.  I got so comfortable there. I forgot what it was like having a big house, nice things, outdoor space, not having to worry about social pressures like dating, being around loved ones. 

Recently, I decided it was time to move back into the swing of things. I got full approval from work to go remote and chose a city that seemed to have a vibe, but where I didn’t know many people. Now that I’m about a month and a half in I’ve had so much anxiety. To be honest, while it comes from several directions, the bulk of it feels like it’s from the extreme anonymity and loneliness - it makes my house feel smaller, the city feel more claustrophobic, and just everything overall more confining. I don’t think I made a mistake and am proud of making a move, especially given my history with GAD and panic attack disorder, but I’m having so much cabin fever and overall difficulty just letting go at the end the day when I’m home.  Making some progress but I’m already scheming in my head how to move back to where I’m from since work only approved for me to work from this town.  

I said I don’t think it’s a mistake but im frustrated I’m in this pickle and low key feel f****ed for doing this after having such a good time where I’m from. Why on earth did I do this, again?!?