i am so sick of being in pain, im so depressed i just cant i cant talk to anyone like literally i cant tlk but im in a constant sate of pain with chronic migranes and im so depressed and anxious and mad at everything that it physically urts, im tired of having these paranoid thoughts, the depression, the complete lack of self work i just cant do it anymore im just a mistake man it hurts so bad i cant do anything right no matter what i do its never good enough i dont wanna die i just wanna fade away and just observe and not have to interact with them anymore. im sick of not knowing what is real, i havent had a hallucination in a while but idk i cant even tell what a hallucination is anymore if i hear something outside my window or people talking quietly but i cant see them i question if it really was there or if its in my head. i cant tell it looks like im seeing life through a pane of glass and that nothing looks real, it looks like a cheap low budget slasher film idk man i just cant do it