Very often I just feel empty and I feel literally nothing. But if I do, it's overwhelming and all my feelings of guilt, self-loathing and anxiety almost consume me. That's when I turn to self harm or alcohol in order to numb myself or distract me. Does that sound like BPD? I'm not diagnosed but I feel like I have quite a lot of symptoms. I'm still scared of getting professional help, though. I'm full of shame and I feel like talking about it would make it "real" in a way. That sounds probably stupid.