My name is kaydi, I have bpd &amp; I'm 28. Nice to meet y'all. 

I need a bit of advice...if anyone can help me.

I have a four year old daughter named Sadie; she's my whole heart y'all
 I'm a good mom. She doesn't go without and she's so happy it's contagious. But I don't spend enough quality time with her.

I want to be a more active parent. Play games, read stories, the good stuff, but I have this monster, y'know? But I don't know how to do that kind of thing.  I feel like such an awful parent. I cry a lot about this. It breaks me apart that I cannot do the things I want to do because my mom ignored me she never taught me.. How do I be a better mom ? How do I motivate myself to learn and do more than just "be" so to speak?