we're both in bed, but i can't sleep. i started thinking about this relationship, about if it's worth the effort, about why is he quiet and distant with me at times. I'm going without any brakes and my heart is racing. I feel like I'm losing myself again for my partner (like in my past relationship), which at the end it makes me more unsatisfied because of all the effort I put i get almost nothing from it.
 I'm always questioning myself if he still wants me in his life, of he thinks it's worth it. And these questions mainly arise because i tend to compare to our beginnings and how evolved and caring he was. but now it became...more distant? 
He also works so I'm trying to think it's just because he's tired. But then also i think "ok this also happens when he's not working". He doesn't engage almost with what I say and It's very tiring.
Idk, I'm trying to cope with how I'm feeling now.