23 M here. I swear dating is a road to complete relapse of symptoms. Luckily, I haven't lashed out to the girl I'm dating but I had to message friends and family to vent and their advice hasn't really been helping considering they all have different experiences in dating. 

It got to the point of complete apathy today but I will still end up with feelings for her, so I'm just communicating like nothing is wrong because it's so complicated to explain. I haven't disclosed my diagnosis yet. She knows about my past, my current habits, interest, hobbies, and that I take medication. Also, that I have anxiety, depression and ADHD. I also educated her on mental health issues. I'm just afraid she will see me differently if I disclose my BPD diagnosis at least at the early stages of dating.

We are still only a month in and we both disclosed our feelings for each other. Kissed, cuddled, and made out. We aren't in a relationship yet though, it's a long story. Now we agreed to take a break from seeing each other and talking consistently, but we are still messaging each other everyday and calling here and there. 

Looks like I have to go back to therapy...