My boyfriend just had a very long meeting with his colleagues and team leader. We work from home and we are in the same room so while he was in the meeting I was doing my thing.

At one point I turned around and saw him checking the profile picture of his team leader (female) and it made me feel kinda bad. Two minutes later the meeting ends and I turn around to talk to him and he was in the group chat. She had left some messages there and he reacted to all of them with heart emojis. That made me feel awful instantly and the anxiety kicked me and I started shaking.

He comes to talk to me and I tried my best to not say anything but I end up asking him if he likes her or something because he looked at her photo and then liked everything so lovey.

He said no, he was looking at her picture trying to figure out where she is from (we were discussing that yesterday) and that he liked the comments because he was trying to be nice.

He got a little bit frustrated because of what I said so he said “okay” and turned around to watch some videos.

I just left the room after five minutes without moving, feeling both super jealous and ugly and also feeling awful for reacting this way.

I hate this, I hate my feelings and I hate myself.