Over the past year I've been very depressed and it just keeps getting worse to the point where I don't want to exit anymore.

In the past I've made mistakes and hurt people, people who were important to me I never wanted to hurt anyone I really tried changing myself and becoming a better person... 

But I feel like no matter how much I change I will never be a better person and how what has been done can't be undone anymore

I hate myself I'm a disgusting and an awful person that just isn't worth anything and I want it to end I don't want to feel like I'm the problem anymore I'm tired of it 

I'm just so sick of myself, why do I feel this way? No matter how much I try to fix my mistakes the damage has been done and there's no way of contacting the people I've hurt, and the apologies I've said already feel like they'll never be enough, the changes I've made to myself will never be enough and will never make me a better person 

Why do I feel this way? Why can't I accept myself and move on why must each day have to be a nightmare of the past haunting my day and night? 

All this guilt and hate I wish I wasn't born I wish I never did those mistakes I wish I wasn't here typing this