I have been skipping classes of a certain prof since the semester has started. I only attended two of them. She keeps picking on students randomly, and this semester, my anxiety is on the peak. Even thinking about that class makes me nauseous. I hate when profs kept on asking questions while teaching us, it’s really nerve wrecking and distracting for me. Last semester, I did attend her all classes but now I can’t even get myself to attend it even tho it’s online. Also if someone doesn’t reply to her during online classes, she says there is no need to attend it if you are not gonna speak up. Which is pretty reasonable. This makes me envy those other students who love these interactive classes. I don’t used mind this in offline classes that much. I just hate this random picking thing!! I do sound really stupid and childish. I haven’t doing great at all in general. This is lowest I have ever been. It feels like a lot is going, when there is nothing going on at all. I don’t understand a shit I am studying these days which eventually add on to my self doubt mechanism. College is not giving me a break. Idk how I’ll manage out of this semester. I am not even trying to stay in with my high school friends. I just pushing everyone even though I don’t want but I don’t have any energy to talk and call them.