As the title says, I stopped taking my meds, it’s been almost three weeks.

I was in a really low low mood, I was thinking of killing myself constantly but as per usual, the only thing stoping me is my parents because I don’t want to hurt them.

I wasn’t planning on stopping my meds, I have been on medication for 8 years now but I forgot a couple times and noticed my mood was improving so I stopped taking them. Cold turkey.

Please save it, I know it’s not good to stop all of a sudden but lately I have such a death wish that I just don’t care what happens to me anymore.

I noticed I was more focused, more clear headed, I wanted to socialize more. I felt on top of the world but I started noticing the overwhelming traits of BPD. I’m depersonalizing a lot more, I have awful mood swings between I want to kill myself and I feel on my A Game. I’m paranoid and I overthink a lot. 

And I just exploded for the most stupid shit ever to my parents who don’t deserve this shit. 
 
At one point I was a person with a lot of goals, ambitious, creative and now I’m just a shell of a person who’s only goal is to be alive by the end of the year.