What it boils down to is this: people keep telling me that my thoughts are wrong, and that for me to be less annoying and more tolerable, I have to love myself and believe in myself. but how can i do that when I have a personality disorder? how am i supposed to love myself when everyone keeps telling me how offputting my behaviour is? there’s something wrong with me and i behave strangely, so I can’t love myself. I can only love myself when i manage to control myself perfectly and NOT “be myself”. i never succeed. besides, beyond having BPD, i don’t know who ‘myself’ is anyway. 

it’s a vicious circle and i don’t understand it.