I’ve got BPD and OCD so I’m not sure which one this falls under but I’ll try it here:

About 4 years ago I hit an ultimate low and was ridiculously depressed. I was never interested in medication, but my therapist kept harping on me that the medication was the main thing that would fix it. Well I finally gave in and was put on Zoloft and Seraquil. Oh boy was that a mistake. I made some HUGE out of character decisions and actions (one of those actions led to an arrest and another one of those actions led to a suicide attempt). After some bad consequences happened from my actions, I trashed the medication. To this day I have things about me I wish would stop. Mainly it’s my anxiety and how it flares up randomly and makes me shake and stutter. In my job position I have to be more steady and level-headed. What should I do?