I don't know if I am being an asshole, hell I'm not even sorry anymore.
It's always about me understanding everyone else's circumstances and no one accomodates mine.
Like when I got bullied because they had some internal shit going on, which left me with BPD. I'm supposed to be understanding of their troubles and not hold it against them while every minor infraction I commit is magnified.
Like I SHOULDN'T be thinking like that, or this, or I SHOULDN'T get angry or rage like man it isn't even in my control, I'm hardly in control of my emotions what do they expect?
I'm tired of being the understanding one ALWAYS. If everyone else is doing it all the time, man how the fuck are you guys happy? Let me know please, because no one seems ready to understand that I have a few issues I CAN'T control yet.
I've been crying since I was like 10 all over my personal diary(s) to be UNDERSTOOD by just one person, but no, I'm always the only one who has to adjust to their needs, UNDERSTAND where they come from or forsake the relationship.
My brain is so fucked up I can't even form coherent thoughts no more.