I am terrified when I scream. I am terrified when I will not listen to others. I am terrified when I do what I want with wanton disregard for others. I am terrified when I rebuke someone for trying to help me in the way I *asked* him to. I am terrified when I make a commitment in one mindset and cannot keep the said commitment in a different mindset.

And others feel almost as if I don't care or am exaggerating or could just exercise more self-control.