It's been 4 years since I've adopted my cat. She used to sleep between the pillows on my bed, I'd wake up to her licking my nose or her paw in my hand it was adorable. It's been a year or so since I've moved in with  a new roommate &amp; I can't help but think she loves her more now.
 Is it because I don't let you scratch the furniture? I don't play with you or give you enough treats? I don't get it.
I feed her &amp; take care of her &amp; I barely see her anymore. She's moved on.
Even my fucking cats abandoned me.
It's so stupid but I wonder what would happen if I started locking my door. If I abandoned you first would you even notice or care?
I could make life difficult for you. Your litter is in my room I hear you coming in when I'm asleep to do your business just to return back downstairs to visit my roommate. 
If I locked my door, if I distanced myself, spent less time at home &amp; available to you would it be different? 
FML I'm a sick fuck. 
Just kill me now Carona. 
-xo