Heres the TLDR because im ADHD and they should always go at the top IMO.  
Long story short, I dont "do" surface, fun relationships. I am 100% all in all the time, i over share, im incredibly loyal, i strive to be the supportive, loving friend to my friends that i wish i had my whole life. And i expect all my friends to somehow be the same, so this is a difficult new thing for me to try.  
My Therapist suggests i keep 3 levels of friendships:  
1. Deep meaningful, supportive, mindful  
2. Fun, low expectations, basic trust  
3. Surface/ "Superficial", minimal trust, no expectations  


Backstory and a bit of a vent:   
I have some new-ish friends, they dont understand or show interest in my mental health or BPD or ADHD or CPTSD or Therapy (unless im giving them advice i have recieved from therapy), thats fine most of the time but some of the time they say super insensitive things like "nooo you dont need therapy" or "i would never think you need to be in therapy because you are so normal" or "ive never seen you like that (highly emotionla, in a meltdown etc)".  


I dissapear for a few day sometimes when things get overwhelming, and i usually tell people beforehand that i need some time. Apparently they didnt take it too well and all hung out together and talked about me in my absence, got mad with me and blah blah blah.

i asked one of them about it and spent the whole day super sad and crying about why they all bitched about me, when i just needed some time away, and this friend, she never diffused this at all, actually encouraged me to talk about this etc. 

I confronted the other two, pretty rationally, i was super proud of myself the way i handled it, and they totally denied that they were mad and that they understoon sometimes i just need some time. 

The friend i had been talking about it with all day, also said she was mad at me and built me up to be some kind of monster in her head, and also said things to the others to make them mad, and also said something like if she hadnt met me at work there was no way she would be friends with me because we have nothing in common (wtf why are you telling me this).

The others confronted my now kinda mean friend, and she TOTALLY DENIED THE WHOLE THING and then TRIED TO GAS LIGHT ME!!!!!??????!!!!!?!?!!?!?!? Telling me she did not say the things that i had said she said and that she is sorry i misunderstood what she was saying. ummm EXCUSE ME no.

Normally i would question everything and blame myself, and think she was right but i actually didnt do this this time, because i was SUPER SAFE IN THE KNOWLEDGE  that i did NOTHING wrong, and so now i should not trust this friend. 

&amp;#x200B;

Im working really hard to not do my usual "they wronged me/im embarassed, i need to cut them out of my life" thing, and to keep healthy boundaries and to just not trust some people as much as others, because i just over trust everyone.