my partner is settling for me. 
my partner deserves better.
i’m too much work and probably shouldn’t be in  relationship. 
all i do is add stress to my partner’s life.

i feel these thoughts constantly. i even try to self sabotage and ruin the relationship on purpose. when i tell my partner my thoughts on how they deserve better, they’re usually just very confused because they love me very much, and love being with me (that’s what they say, anyways!)
i just have such trouble believing them. a lot of the times i’m fine, but when i’m having a Bpd Moment i immediately feel such intense guilt for putting my partner through that. it doesn’t feel fair to them.
but, again, they WANT to be with me. and remind me of that a lot. they tell me they can handle my problems, knew what they were getting into, and that i am overthinking how “difficult” i am.
ugh. advice? tips? tricks? feeling this way is exhausting. i don’t want to feel like i Should break up with my partner because they deserve better than me. it fucking sucks