I’ve got no motivation for anything that’s outside my house, I’m addicted to sex games and drugs I don’t do anything that is good for me in the long run I’ve even gotten fired from every job I had this year.  I’ve finally found out the one women I’ve chased for so long doesn’t want me anymore and I feel like I’m close to the final straw I’m crying nearly every night and the only thing working is listening to music which is bound to make me feel both ways. Maybe some one out there can relate to me feeling like such a fuck up. I’ve always wanted to die I thought for s long time it’s  just BPD talking but once I stop try taking drugs for s few months I’ll be able to make a proper choice then