Hello everyone I’m a teen writing this as I am having an anxiety/panic attack. I don’t really know which one. I haven’t actually been diagnosed. I’m just tired. Really tired and need someone to help me. I just want it to be gone yet I know it never will. It’s stuck inside me no matter what I do. No matter how hard I try. I am always dry heaving/gagging which “I think” comes from my anxiety/depression. It is the worst feeling ever. It doesn’t go away. I always keep telling myself that if only suicide didn’t hurt I would have already done it all those years ago. I just feel tired and want it gone. It never goes away. I don’t sleep anymore. I can’t sleep, especially at night time. I can only sleep when I’m tired. I always cry at night thinking when it will it end which I know never will. I am just so tired and don’t know what to do. I know I should seek help from someone  especially a counselor/psychiatrist but I can’t. I don’t have enough money. I’m also scared to do it. Also, whenever my parents leave me home alone to go to work, my anxiety/depression kicks in and is at its worst. I guess the reason behind it (and I’m not even sure) is no one would be able to help me. I just hate the feeling of anxiety/depression or whatever this is. I don’t even know which one I have. I am dry heaving/gagging constantly which is the thing I hate the most it never goes away no matter what I do. I just want to end it all. I’m just afraid to do it because I don’t want to experience pain. Never have. I can’t imagine how painful it would be. But I just want to be gone and rest