I could not control always venting to them about my problems in school and family. I didn’t want them to feel like I was using them as a therapist because I didn’t want to become a burden.

I had also every intention of ending my life and I just couldn’t fake being happy and no matter how many movies we watched/games we played I still felt anxious about the events that happened in my personal life. 

Most of my friends were already 25-30 so they already went through that phase and gave me some advice and stories about how they also hit rock bottom. Sometimes I do crave companionship but maybe when I’m more level headed. Until then I have to figure stuff on my own.