I’m realizing that I am probably better off spending less gaming and chatting with people on social media apps. I have used various platforms to regulate my mental illness symptoms. I wanted to drown out the racing thoughts, maladaptive daydreams, frequent pacing, restless sleep, etc., So I just threw myself into these areas and it sort of worked. But I am much more sensitive to rudeness than others. I had someone roll their eyes on me and hang up on a call. It ruined my mood. Everyday this week something or someone has pissed me off and I’m realizing it’s stemming from these online spaces.

In online spaces, all the assholes and weirdos congregate in one place so I’m bound to encounter them online more frequently. Much more than I’d like to. I think this subreddit is the only place where I feel understood and normal. But I used it more as a guide rather than a regulator. Gaming circles are just not the sort of thing I want to be apart of anymore.