I used to work for a man and I now know since being diagnosed that he was my FP. But we fell out spectacularly, there was huge amounts of stress due to the financial crash,  I behaved terribly so did he, I felt he betrayed me, I became paranoid and couldn’t trust anyone. I walked away. When my fp’s son died I attended the funeral but didn’t offer any condolences- I had been friends with the son too. I felt that I was right  and that I was taking the moral high ground but principles are important so that’s ok. I wanted to destroy my former FP and would even blame him in my own mind for his sons death I often use to think it was Karma for how I was treated.

Now that I have been diagnosed I understand what was going on a lot better and what BPD is. All my actions and reactions were BPD driven. Now six years after my FP,s son died, I feel as I should reach out and try and explain. Have any of you tried to make amends? What do you think I should do? Somehow I feel as if people need to understand that I’m not a monster and pretty much my behaviour, my anger and vindictiveness was all down to BPD.

What do you think?