For those with BPD, how do (or can?) you respect your partner's need to go No Contact?

When it reaches this point, how do you let go? I'm finding myself physically ill just waiting and hoping for her to message me back. We haven't discussed going NC, but it's apparent that's what's happening. 

Regardless of my own heartbreak and the pain of losing the person I love most, I still care about her and I know she's hurting too. I know breaking off contact is her own way of finding peace and clarity, and I genuinely care about her and I want to support her. 

The hard part is, me supporting her comes at the expense of me needing her. For anyone else who's been in this position or can relate, what do I do? The notion of throwing my phone in the lake seems like such a relief 😭