for some reason i keep catching myself wondering whether i’m “bipolar” enough. 
i haven’t had a manic episode in a few months, i’ve mainly just been depressed, and then i start thinking to myself “am i really bipolar? or am i just depressed”

i was diagnosed with depression in 2020, medicated for it, and the medication ended up being a trigger for a looong manic episode (not sure how lol my also bipolar sister just says it’s too similar timing for it to be a coincidence)

then i was diagnosed with bipolar this year, january i think?? i haven’t really heard much of it regarding therapy sessions, medication etc etc since then

it was basically just “this is what you’ve got, and we’ll give you resources to help…… at some point in the far future.”

so now i’m just wondering whether i really am bipolar or whether it’s something else

i still have some weird symptoms of it, such as staying up all night to binge watch a show so i can write reviews on it (got the weird idea in my head that i wanted to be a blogger- even though i hate writing???)

and staying up all night to deep clean the entire house

running away at the same time for days and just sitting in a field many miles away from my house listening to music all day 


there’s things like that, that bring me reassurance that there is something wrong with me, but then i just get random lapses of belief where i’m just like “nah i’m healthy now”

does anyone know what i mean???