I’ve always had a very anxious personality but didn’t really have my first panic attack until a week ago. Well, I’ve had them but usually under the influence of something I.e. drugs, alcohol, caffeine. This really triggered my anxiety and I haven’t felt peace since. I manage to get a hold of a psychiatrist and I’ve been on buspirone (15g total per day) for 4 days now. I’m not sure if it’s in my head or my meds but I’m an anxious mess and I feel hyperactive and constantly over stimulated. 

I have a trip to Cancun in two days. It’s supposed to be relaxing (no partying, just lounging and exploring) but my brain is absolutely fucked right now. I’m not sure if it’s a good idea. Canceling everything will also be a stress of it’s own. But I’m scared of the airport, I’m scared of the plane idk if I can handle being in a enclosed space with that many people for that long. I’m scared to be in another country while in this state. My friend is also highly dependent on me because she’s never been international so I’d have to take care of her. I spoke with my doctor and he prescribed a few pills of Ativan just to get me through my trip. 

I just feel really uneasy. All these emotions and meds are so new to me. People are telling me perhaps I need this vacation. Is it a good idea? Has anyone ever mixed Ativan with buspirone?