i’ve struggled with mental illness since i was 14. i’m 21 now and i’m so mad at me. i spent all my teen years eating like shit and bc i never got “fat” i thought it was okay. i have diabetes and high blood pressure now, gum disease, acid reflux. i get pneumonia every year because my lungs are weak from smoking since i was a kid. i can barely get up to shower and i have a consistent cough thats so bad i throw up. i never went to college and i have no friends. i got a deadend office job and i hate it and honestly can only do it because im on adderall. i have knots in my hair that i don’t even know how to get out. i wish i didnt try to rush growing up and i wish i didnt have bpd and i wish i was happy 👍  just venting