My family hasn’t been allowing me to go into meds because they fear about the side effects it may cause me as a student. I have been depressed ever since I was 10 (over being sexually abused) and have attempted suicide twice but contemplated doing it almost every day. 

My aunt who’s a doctor thinks that my depression isn’t major enough to go into meds eventho I told her I was feeling suicidal. I don’t feel it now but I feel completely numb and emotionless everyday. 

Is it really bad as they say?