Don’t get me wrong, I’m M[26] still pretty depressed. But after ages I finally feel a little like myself.  

These last 2 months have been nothing less than a disaster. I’ve had friends ghost me for unknown reasons. I’ve been mourning the death of a close friend, she passed away in December in a car accident., but the worst hit when the people I held dear upped and left. 3 people just vanished without any explanation, one of them who I’ve had in my life since my college years. 

I don’t understand what I did wrong, but maybe that’s the price of growing up. Each of our last conversations were just normal stuff. 

I tried contacting them, but they’ve made it plenty clear that they don’t want to talk to me. 

I’ve been lonely and depressed af. I barely talk to anyone these days. The ones I do, usually come over or invite me over but I run out of social energy so fast, I either leave or make an excuse for cutting our time short. I was not like this. I was an extrovert who loved going out, meeting people, spending time with them. Not as much these past few months


They say relationships break you. But when friends leave without even a single explanation it hurts more. I’ve literally tried to kill myself over a relationship, but this shit hurt more. I’m just surprised, apart from redeveloping cynicism and self deprecating thoughts, I didn’t harm myself much, I just held on to some tiny hope that it’s just a misunderstanding, or they’re depressed too or some shit that can be explained. I want to know what I did wrong. I’m so fucking pissed off and confused as to why they can’t just give me a simple one line to fucking give me closure. Would that be so fucking hard??