I'm a loser who always fucks things up. I haven't got friends or a girlfriend, and I am exceedingly lonely. And my shyness and extreme self-consciousness make meeting people almost impossible. People say that I'm smart and could "*go on to do big things*", but what does that matter? I mean, I might one day graduate with good grades, but if my social- and personal life will always be this shit, the grades will hardly make me smile.

Pretty much the only think that keeps me going is that there are about 4 people who'd be genuinely sad if I died, and I don't want to do that to them. But I do sometimes wish that I was never born in the first place. Would be better than being alone for 350 days a year.