kind of a rant but also a question. i’ve heard many times that people don’t know if i’m serious or joking or what i’m thinking because my face always looks the same. i don’t agree because i feel like my voice and face change but i guess not. anyways the issue right now is my bf (pretty new but we say i love you and such already cause yk that intensity of bpd) is telling me he feels like giving up on me cause he says i act like i don’t really like him that much and like i get why he thinks that but to me i’ve been like super open and lovey and cuddly so idk what else to do. but to him he doesn’t know what to do because i’m not showing the same affection back. he’s saying when he says he loves me or calls me beautiful or something i’m just like “hmm” which is true bc i don’t know what to say??? i say i love you back but wtf do i say besides thank you every time he compliments me or something ??? i told him i appreciate it a lot and i like it i just don’t know what to say or how to react so like ??? i really do appreciate it too like i think the reason it’s gone so good so far is because he’s good at reassuring me and making me feel wanted. it’s so weird to feel soooooo much but have people think i don’t care. idk if it’s cause i’ve tried to hide my emotions so much, since they are so extreme and make me look crazy. i’m also not used to a dude like wanting to be with me and be loyal and stuff, like the thought of him cheating lowkey comforts me though i KNOW i would be so so so hurt. it’s pathetic like i don’t think i deserve anything good. 
anyways while typing this rant me and my bf broke up lol. he said for weeks it seemed like i kinda stopped carrying or loving him. i’m really upset he didn’t tell me this because this meant for weeks he’s been having these negative thoughts about me and the relationship and i’ve just been oblivious to them, thinking everything was okay, if not better than okay. im so surprised by this honestly, i was really happy with how things were going. cant be too shocked tho lol i don’t expect people to stay in my life. 
anyways yeah lol anyone else hear they don’t really show their emotions but you know you’re feeling them?