As the title says, I am failing everything and I want to die.

I’m in a awkward place in my life rn. I moved abroad to try and escape my depression but that hasn’t worked. Back in my home country (UK) I had a shitty job, virtually no friends and no future prospects because of a lack of education. Before then I did really well in school, but dropped out with no qualifications because of depression. The main trigger was that I got rejected by my dream university. My whole life I had been depressed and I thought that if I worked hard I could go to my dream university and things will be better. That was my only hope. So when I got rejected my world crumbled.

I tried taking the qualifications a year after dropping out and failed all but one because of depression… I tried applying to a universities that didn’t require those qualifications (art school) but got rejected again… 
During this time i was working in a dead end supermarket job. I had no friends there and the pay was terrible so my life felt meaningless. I decided after the last university rejection that I would use my limited savings to go study abroad as the requirements are basically to just have the money to pay the tuition fees. I got in so I quit my job and moved to a different continent. And now that I am here i am failing again. I didn’t expect to need to study as much as we have to. In all honesty I just wanted a laid back course to do so I could have fun exploring the country. I underestimated how much time the course would need. I don’t live I student accomadation so I am completely isolated. I don’t have any native friends so I don’t get any practice using the language. These things make me depressed, which makes me lost the motivation to study or even attend class. Now I’ve fallen behind so much that I feel to ashamed/embarrassed to attend class. I don’t want my lack of skills to draw attention to myself. As I child I got severely bullied so now as an adult I fear being ostracised by others for any reason. Speaking of which, this fear has led me to hide who I am in a sense. I pretend to be someone I’m not to fit in with the few “friends” I have here but I feel sad because I know I can’t be honest abou the struggles I am having. My adhd means I find it hard to focus in class or when studying alone and it means that I can’t organise myself. I haven’t told the school because of these stigma here and because my school doesn’t seem to have any support available to international students. 
I don’t want to go back home to the UK because I really hate it hear but I can’t cope with having to repeat the semester because I know I’ll be the only one. I only have enough money for 2 semesters so I’ll feel sad and ashamed that I only learnt one semesters worth of the local language when I go back home. I really don’t know what to do. I have no one to go to for help. I feel really sad and I hate my life so much because I’m such a failure. I wish that I could kill myself to end the suffering but I’m too much of a coward :(