I was getting better. Losing weight, working out daily, talking to people, everything of that sort. And i was talking to someone, I thought we became very close, I thought that she was like my bestfriend. I told her everything and would be very excited to talk to her. And when college said it was finally reopening in my final year, I just thought how I could finally meet her again and hang out together. 

But yesterday, I found out that 2 of my friends started talking to each other (platonically) and would have regular calls, text each other, and were very friendly. This was like in maybe a month of talking. And I realised that she barely ever texts me first, never called me no matter what. 

I have a few close friends who i call every now and then and just talk for like 2 - 4 hours. But she never did anything of that sort. 

It just fucking sucks to realise that someone you thought was your bestfriend was probably just using you for attention. It fucking sucks. I feel like sinking back into depression. But I don't want to. I want to go back into working out. I want to get my bike and travel the country. I don't want to feel sad anymore