I have extensive experience with psych meds, first prescription being abilify and seroquel in 2015, then mirtazapine, wellbutrin, risperidone, cymbalta, trazodone, and more. None of the meds worked for me. Last trial was of fluoxetine in November, which caused severe insomnia on only 10mg, and panic attacks. In March I also tried Zembrin which is a serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SRI). Zembrin also caused panic attacks for me and increased psychotic symptoms. I decided I don't want to touch any additional SSRIs, SNRIs, nor SRIs.

I have also tried shrooms microdosing. I found that 1-4 gram occasional trips are better for me as microdosing makes me fatigued. While on shrooms though, a lot of thoughts came to me about reducing my caffeine intake and lithium. Lithium was mentioned to me several years ago by one consulting psychiatrist, but was never prescribed. I asked my current psych about it, but she refused to prescribe it.

While I was on Zembrin in March, by mid-month I started to get more paranoid and psychotic, as I was also in luteal phase of my cycle. A lot of women with mental illness experience PME - premenstrual exacerbation of symptoms. I unfortunately experience that as well. Mid-March I decided to stop Zembrin and any other supplements I was trying - mushroom coffee, rhodiola rosea, St. John's Wort tea. I also stopped drinking coffee in general as I think it exacerbates my mood swings. I only continued with lithium orotate supplement that I purchased, but I stopped it as well as it seemed that it was causing more frequent urination. As I stopped these supplements and my period stabilized, my mental state somewhat stabilized to a point where I could better observe myself and think about what to do next. I decided that I still wanted to try lithium, but purchased a supplement which was in a different form - liquid which contains lithium chloride, instead of the lithium orotate tablets. I chose lithium chloride because there is more existing research on it than on lithium orotate. I also made homemade CBD oil from the Avidekel strain.

Well it has been over two months since mid-March and I've hard a lot more days which were just 'alright' instead of being a struggle with intrusive thoughts and depression. I've felt more calm and was able to read more throughout these two months, actually finished two books, on my third now. So in general a beneficial experience so far, will see how it goes.