I've been struggling with diagnosed anxiety and depression for years, starting around middle school, but it has gotten substantially worse in the past few months. On top of it being a weird year in general, I've had the added stressors of having to change jobs unexpectedly, losing a relationship, and going through an abortion. I've been having pretty bad anxiety attacks at work and sometimes at home for the past couple months, and will even sometimes self harm (cutting or hitting myself) and have had to miss/ leave work because of anxiety. It was suggested to me by a friend that I consider checking in to a hospital after the holidays if I'm genuinely having this hard of a time, and I've been thinking about it but I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm losing control and I don't want to deal with these emotions and stressors anymore, and I think about hurting myself all the time and sometimes act on it--- sometimes when I have my anxiety attacks at work I consider hurting myself badly enough that I'll have to go to a hospital and they're just make me stay so I don't have to decide for myself. But I'm worried that I'm being dramatic or that others will think I am and not understand why I need to go, and I'm also worried that it'll be expensive and I'll get in trouble for missing work and that it won't help, that'll it'll stress me out even more. It's not like I'm planning to kill myself but I do self harm extremely often, sometimes even causing bruising to my face, and I have anxiety attacks almost daily at work that make it nearly impossible to work/ function sometimes and I don't know what to do anymore and I've thought about hurting myself just to get some help. Any advice??? I really need help here.