Today has not been good. I’m in the midst of a double depressive episode. I wasn’t going to go to the gym, but I forced myself to. Trying to get some dopamine to maybe pull me out of this. Instead as I was working out all I could think was I’m tired. Tired of being this way. Tired of existing. Just tired. I was crying and working out. Then to top it off I had this guy I was texting tell me I deserved to be cheated on because I wouldn’t meet him for coffee. My ex husband told me he is in love with the woman he had an affair with - just to make me feel like shit. Im not sure what to do to get out of this feeling. It’s just been a crappy day and I don’t want to be here anymore.