In the past two weeks I have had 3 extreme episodes that consist of getting angry and extremely emotional because I fear my boyfriend will abandon me. I have never felt this way in a relationship before and my boyfriend has never done anything to suggest that he will leave me or doesn't love me. After my second outburst with him he suggested that I may have BPD tendencies and it really scared me. I am 34 years old and have never felt this way. I have been a pretty healthy human being and have accomplished a lot. I have also been seeing a therapist for 3 years just to help with stress and some self esteem issues. I had a horrible episode last night with my boyfriend and I know he doesn't deserve the way I treated him but I couldn't control myself. He had gone to visit friends over the weekend because he thought it would be good for us to have some time apart. I was sad about this but kept myself busy and he called me and texted me saying sweet things. When he told me he would be getting home later than he originally thought I felt a hot rush all over. I was angry and hurt. When he got home I went crazy. I don't know what to say to him to let him know how ashamed I am and now I'm even more scared that he will leave me. I don't want to lose him but I fear I have messed up too much. I have been having an anxiety attack all day and he is working. How can I get him to forgive me and see that I will get help so this doesn't happen anymore? I am lost and so scared and am feeling so alone right now. 