Since I was a kid, apart my family that is very caring and in whom I trust a lot, I failed developing meaningful relationships w people. I always been mocked, rejected, a side character, someone to fill the void or to add to a group to make it fuller. 

I don’t really mean anything to anyone. Nobody would reach for me, nobody would care or even notice if I’m gone. Only my family.

With time I am so distrusting in people that I reject anyone that tries to get to know me, I accumulated hatred and resentment towards every group of friends I have. 

I always try to better myself, to try new things and to get out of my box and distance myself from negative thoughts. But it’s never enough. 

It’s been years I hate myself and I isolate myself more and more to avoid getting hurt anymore. 

I want to erase my existence.