When I can feel an episode coming, my voice gets shaky and I can't focus on anything else apart from this one thing triggering it. But at these times I don't want to spend hours crying and questioning my life and hating my actions. So I started biting my wrists. At first it was just a one time thing and I knew I didn't want to start cutting myself. I don't like scars on my body so I always knew that I would never want to cut myself. But it has been a few weeks now since I've started biting my wrists that I don't think they can go on without doing it. It gives me instant mental relief since now I focus on the physical pain on my wrists instead of the pain in my heart or the troubles on my mind. Any trace of the biting fades away in a couple of hours anyway so I don't think it's too bad. Don't get me wrong, I'm ashamed of this and the fact that I find relief in this, but I can't deny that it helps me, even a little bit, in the moment.