Like so many others within the creative field,

I have a constant battle with procrastination, anxiety and putting off projects. Even now, as a paid professional.

Currently, my line of work has had a huge boom and I have quite a backlog. I've overcome the stress of this and I'm taking on one project at a time.

My problem starts with when I start the project. It's a real battle. Think, war of art- Steven Pressfield type, MAJOR RESISTANCE.

I'm in the beginning stages of success and have been consistently delivering good work. However, I can't help but be overcome with fear and dread, "whats the point?" apathy, a feeling like I'm going to die and restlessness when I'm engaged with my work.

Even when the switch in my brain flicks and I go from procrastinating to obsessed and fully involved in the work, I get overly excited with what I'm doing and feel myself become overwhelmed with the whole thing. I'm proud of what I'm producing, so it's not the usual fear of people/client not liking the result. A good analogy would be to say it feels like I'm holding onto a magic wand made out of fire. The wand is awesome and its great as creating magic, but it hurts to hold. The longer I hold it, the more it hurts.

How do people make it work? I feel like this is the only thing holding me back. If this wasn't an issue, my backlog would have been cleared already. Instead, I keep pushing back deadlines and making excuses because the struggle makes everything take 5x as long.

&amp;#x200B;

I'm not an anxious person... until it comes to my creative work.