text: MY HUSBAND APOLOGIZED FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING MY ILLNESS | ProHealth Fibromyalgia, ME/CFS and Lyme Disease Forums
  MY HUSBAND APOLOGIZED FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING MY ILLNESS
  Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by eeyoreblue02, Oct 26, 2006.
  Sunday afternoon my husband came home from work and told me he owed me a huge apology. He works with a woman who has fibromyalgia. He has always told me how she works harder than I do and I should be able to do more if she can.
  The reason he is apologizing is because he had a discussion with her where she told him how sick she used to be. She told him about having days where she couldn't even get out of bed. She told him how the pain was so unbearable she couldn't function in her everyday life.
  A few years ago I had to stop driving a manual shift car due to my illness. My husband thought it was more of an excuse to get a new car. The lady at work commented she needed to buy another car. Another employee asked her if she could drive a manual shift car. Her reply was that, yes, she knew how to drive one, but her body would not allow her to do so. This is what first caught my husband's attention.
  She then proceeded to tell how treatment had helped her to come a long, long way with this disease. I asked my husband what treatment she had received, but he said he didn't even think to ask because he was so very ashamed of himself. He has apologized every day this week.
  I am going to ask him to find out what treatment the woman had. If I think it would be beneficial to me I may ask him if she would be willing to talk to me.
  It lifts my spirits to hear of someone who has greatly improved with this dd and it also helps to hear my husband tell me how sorry he is for thinking I was exaggerating.
  Just wanted to share this with you guys. Hope everyone here is having a wonderful, pain-free day.
  eeyoreblue02, Oct 26, 2006
  I'm so happy for you! Now, maybe he will take an active roll in helping you find the best treatment plan for you!
  Even though you'll still have to face the unbelievers outside of your home, the comfort an understanding spouse provides will help you have strength to deal with it.
  I am sooo glad that your husband appologized to you! That is such a wonderful thing. I am glad that now he realizes how bad this is for you and that you are not exaggerating. This really is great. My boyfriend of 8 years has always been so understanding of me and this illness and I tell you it makes a HUGE difference in my life just to have his understanding and support. With so many out there who don't understand it is great to live with someone who does. He is my comfort zone.
  I think this will really be great for you and make a big difference in your life with this illness. Maybe now he can help you more in your quest to get treatment. Sounds like that lady may be a great place to start.
  See everyone this is why we need to get the word out and create awarness...so more people will get this information and understand us better!
  I wish my parnter could meet this woman too. I think he's propbaly the only one who doesn't take me seriously sometimes though he is getting better.
  I don't want him to think of me as differently abled but i would like more help on occasion.
  I do understand how it can be difficult though for him to guage where i'm at as somedays he can see me running round with the hoover and the next day i can't make a cup of tea. It must be very confusing for him bless him!
  when he pulls his back or hurts himself doing sports I used to say 'now you have a small idea of how i feel most of the time' but now i just try to be helpful to him at these time in the hope that he will reciprocate when i'm ill. This seems to work better!!
  it must be very hard for someone who does not experience this to understand that every movement hurts, even on a good day and i think they just cannot picture what is like.
  best of luck with youe husband - it really sounds like you've turned a corner.
  please talk to her and then tell us what she did
  hearing about someone else to get understanding. I know at my old job, one of the ladies went to church with a woman who has FM and she was always very sympathytic with me. The others had no idea and really didnt understand.
  Im very blessed, my husband is wonderful and now that Im home, he keeps me going. Best of luck to you!!
  suzette1954, Oct 26, 2006
  You are all so sweet. I was looking at everyone's profile and I saw some beautiful people. A couple of you are WAY too young to have to deal with this.
  If I get any more info from the lady who works with my husband I will be sure to let you know. I'm almost afraid to ask for fear it's going to be absolutely nothing different from anything we have heard before.