text: Interestingly, it often turns out that the more trouble he gives you, the more likely he is to impress - or even amaze you - later on.
  And in doing so, he slowly begins to experience the sense of self without which he would always remain a child - someone less than, and dependent upon you.
  For that reason, this transition requires what is often known as a transformation - a leap from one state of being to another, completely different one. And when it comes to a transformation, the rule is this: in order to go up, you must first go down. If you want to become something new, you must first let go of what you were before.
  But whatever the case, the important thing is this: the darkness doesn't occur for its own sake. It has no intrinsic, permanent reality. It's there only on behalf of the transformation - the different, far greater light - that will come as a result.
  Most of us look for our answers in the light - in what we already know, what we can understand, where we're comfortable - i.e. in the tried and familiar. But the real answers, the ones that really matter, usually aren't there. Those answers, the ones that allow us to see or be something that we couldn't see or be before, are "over there" - in the place where it's dark.
  If you search for answers only where it's light - in the places you know, in the habits that make you comfortable, in the paradigms you already have - it's almost certain that you will never move very far from where you are right now.
  But if you become willing, instead, to be with the discomfort of the unknown, to reach, even for occasional moments, into the vast mystery, you may discover there an entirely new level of light. And this light, the light that comes from the darkness, does not shine from the outside in. It shines within the depths of your heart, your mind and your soul - from the inside out.
  This threefold process of transformation - from light, to darkness, to a much greater and more internal light - is one of the spiritual poles around which the world spins.
  In the Garden of Eden before the sin, everything was beautiful and holy. There was no darkness at all. But G-d put a snake in the Garden - a snake that would seduce our forebears into rebellion and introduce darkness, evil and exile into Paradise.
  But at the same time, He gave us an unparalleled opportunity - the power to transform all of the darkness of our world into light. And, to transform ourselves from passive recipients of His light to true partners in Creation.
  Now, the light is no longer imposed from the outside. It has become an authentic expression of what lies within. Once this happens, there's simply no darkness left anymore - not because it's suppressed, but because it has been transformed.
  Our struggle is not yet completely over. We are still very much in the process of becoming all that we are destined to be. But we are getting closer and closer to the end of that process. And once we find - fully find - our own inner light, it will be ours forever. There will be no more struggle, because who we should be and who we genuinely, passionately want to be will have become one and the same.
  We are destined - were always destined - to fully embrace our own essence, to experience G-dliness not only from without, but from within.
  Next time you feel stuck, frustrated or disappointed, confronted by an obstacle or challenge - whether in a relationship, work or any other area of life, be aware that you are being presented with a Divine opportunity to access your latent power to make the darkness shine.
  Shifra Hendrie is a professional life coach who specializes in helping talented, ambitious, spiritually-minded professionals.
  You can download Shifra's fascinating new ecourse, "Seven Kabbalah Secrets that Can Change Your Life", free at http://www.KabbalahOfTransformation.com.