If you ever got up and read a morning paper, you might discover little news events, little items of general interest, that might stop you getting immersed in such a gold-plated, triple-decked, star-spangled lie as you have just told me.
たまには早起きして 朝刊でも読んだらどうだ ちゃんと ここに書いてあるだろ そんなバカげたウソを つかずにすむぞ