Manuscript
[This book, the completed manuscript of an adventure story in draft, is covered with notes in Nansi's hand. A few red-inked phrases stand out amid the chaos.] This isn't landing. I don't buy it. Doesn't ring true. Did you mean to do it like this? Could do with another pass. Hah! Get rid of whatever this is. Good flow. All right, I buy it. Seriously? Ah... like this? No. It will be good. But it's not there yet.