I saw their coach talking to the Head judge.
I bet that couple already made it into finals.Pshh,
dance politics!
She only makes finals because her parents
fly her Russian coaches to America.
What's the point of competing?
That couple already won the competition.
Who made their costumes?
Like, they usually place higher because they’re
both attractive.
You forgot your choreography?
I guess you don’t train hard enough then.
That was a body roll.
You know you’re supposed to look sexy when
you do it right?
Check out her ponytail, all she’s good at,
is whipping it around and hitting leaders
in the face.
When salsa leaders learn bachata, they finally
learn how to lead.
Omg look at her kick her leg up.
What does she think this is?
Ballet?!?
Oh, you were trying to do classical ballet?
I thought you were trying to do contemporary.
You must really like Balanchine.
Why else, do your hands look like crab claws?
We don’t flex and strike in Russian ballet…
You should give up.
If you want to succeed in ballet, you need
banana shaped feet and a stick thin body like
me.
Look at her try and point her toes.
Her feet look like biscuits.
Look at her sickle feet in coupe de pied at
the barre.
Like, it doesn’t get any easier than this.
Your leotard looks tighter today.
Did you gain 100 grams?
The harder the skin, the easier the fouetté.
Obviously, you need to train more.
I only puked twice during rehearsals.
What do you mean you didn't throw up?
Are you sure you're working hard enough?
You’ve been training for that long and you
can’t even do high kicks or high jumps?
Like, what have you been doing this whole
time?
If your technique isn’t good enough, then
you’ll NEVER be able to understand my art.
You do Hip Hop?
Like ACTUAL hip hop or like “hip hop”
like studio choreography version?
That’s not real hip hop you know.
You’re actually doing, Jazz funk.
You’ve never trained outside on actual concrete?
You are not, a street dancer.
That is not Fosse.
THIS IS FOSSE!
Omg are you wearing lulu?
No?
Ugh, it’s from discount dancewear?
*puke*
Ewww, you would never see me, in a leotard.
What do you mean you won’t let me borrow
your ibuprofen and your biofreeze?
My kids were so annoying last night.
My children?
Oh god no.
I’m talking about the little street urchins
that I teach dance.
Why is your front layout so low?
It’s more than a tandu...
You call that a swing out?
Ohhhh you're a westie.
That explains your swingout.
OMG I love your dress!
Is it a reproduction though?
I only do vintage swing, and I dance exactly
how they did in the 40s.
That’s the only correct way to do your swing
y’know?
You learned lindy in college?
What are you?
A trend follower?
I started dancing back in the 90s during the
swing revival.
You don’t know what the swing revival is?
Ugh, you need to learn your history.
The next thing you’ll be telling me, is
that you didn’t learn the shim sham, directly
from Frankie Manning himself.
Excuse me, we don’t do Hollywood Style here.
You might as well be doing West Coast Swing
Are you dancing On 1?
Umm, we do Mambo here.
Ew… you dance on 1?
I’m going to walk away now...
You don’t like 10 minute songs?
Haha, I remember when I used to be a beginner
just like you, and didn’t know enough variations.
No, we don’t do the kind of swing that you’re
thinking of.
Look at her, she’s wearing a dress and converse
shoes.
What does she think this is?
Lindy Hop?
Ummm.
West Coast Swing is the greatest social dance
in the world.
Literally, the best.
You’re in Novice?
Ugh.
I do not want to be friends with you.
Omg you’re an Allstar?
Like, lets be friends.
Lets do a strictly sometime?
So, you say you’re good at Zouk?
But, you’re not even Brazilian!
I don’t have to line up, when I want to
dance with anybody.
I’m just that good.
You on the other hand…
You should go line up for that dance.
You still have non-dance friends?
Ohhh that’s cute.
I’m talking to a beginner.
I bet they only made finals, because they’re
sleeping with the judges.
Don’t you know, at this dance competition:
Only skinny girls, make it to finals.
Only the judge’s students, make it to finals.
Only the hot guys, make it to finals.
Only the rich dancers, who pay for all the
private lessons, make it to finals.
You want to make finals like me someday?
I’ll tell you a little secret.
It’s called dancing better.
I mean like, he’s the best dancer, or whatever,
he's still an asshole you know.
Do they really have to kiss, on the dance
floor, like every time?
*barf*
Yea, I’ll dance with him.
But like, they’re not my friend.
Dance is for the athletically talented, and
beautiful ***Tell me I’m beautiful in the
comments if you saw this***
How you felt was dancing, was probably way
better, than how it actually looked.
I honestly didn’t think her costume could
get any worse.
Until I saw her rhinestone it.
Why is she at the front of the class?
She doesn’t even know what she’s doing?
I swear If our dance teacher says one more
time, again, I’m going to slap him.
