r/askreddit teachers of Reddit
what is the most embarrassing reason you
called a child's parents for it wasn't
embarrassing it was funny but in
response to the question what comes in
pairs her son with total sincerity and
enthusiasm said testicles I emailed to
let them know he was a little upset that
I didn't write down his suggestion on
the board his mom said she printed the
email and planned to pull it out again
on some Thanksgiving to read aloud when
he was a teenager
destruction 100 man I feel bad for that
guy in the future I had to call a single
dad to inform him that his six-year-old
son perfectly described an explicit porn
scene to his friends this was before
internet porn so the kid must have found
daddy's special movies my mama was a
kindergarten teacher and had to call a
little boys mom for playing with his
Wang under the table and getting the
girls to look under the table later on
they found out that the kid's dad got
arrested for showing his own Wang to
strange women in Walmart dressing rooms
like father like son
I guess hope he doesn't grow up to be
like him this happened to a colleague
when I worked in elementary school a
kindergartner had asked at the beginning
of gym class to go to the bathroom he
intentionally didn't wipe himself when
he came back to the gym he backed up so
that his ass was right in line with
another kid's face who was sitting
crisscross applesauce on the floor
dropped his pants and put his shitty ass
on that poor kids face my colleague had
to escort them both to the office and
call in a district interpreter to call
the unfortunate child's parents and tell
them that their son might have hepatitis
this reminded me of a time in middle
school my friend was wrestling with
another kid then suddenly the kid's
brother ran up and pinned my friend down
then the kid dropped his shorts and
scraped his bare asshole across my
friends teeth that is absolutely
disgusting and probably a taste he'll
never forget actually had a parent call
me and apologize
threw a kid out of class for licking
highlighters gave him a warning took the
highlighters away somehow he got another
one and did it again told him to go to
detention he protested but eventually
went got a call that night on my
personal phone I have no idea how mom
got my number the
mom profusely apologizing and
straight-up admitting that her son was
being an idiot
then she put him on the phone and made
him apologize too it was really hard not
to laugh because you could tell this kid
had been getting reamed out by his
parents over the incident and was not
interested in talking to me the kid was
like 15 teaching was a fun time in my
life not sure if I'll go back but it
sure was an adventure
wait what he was 15 question mark my
friend recently asked me for my trash
while finishing my lunch during English
and then ate the paper straw and napkin
I thought he was joking when he said
he'd do it
we are seniors still less weird than
highlighters oh he also swallowed a
penny at 8 which I still insist his way
past the penny eating age high school
deaf sped teacher here my student had
contracted a bad stomach virus in his
freshman year he started off the day
perfectly fine had no symptoms and it
suddenly hits him he suddenly asked if
he could go to the bathroom and I could
see on his face that something was wrong
so I let him go he came back almost 30
minutes later in tears because he'd lost
complete control of his bowels on the
way to the bathroom in front of an
entire lunch crowd thankfully his dad
was less than 10 minutes away to help
with a clean change of clothes I
happened to keep baby wipes in stock and
gave him a full pack to clean himself in
a teacher's bathroom where I brought him
when he'd finally come back so he'd of
privacy to clean himself with dad's help
it was awful and I felt so bad for him
poor kid exclamation mark I had a
classmate once that was hit all of a
sudden as well
she took off running for the bathroom
apparently a teacher started yelling at
her for running and my classmate
actually stopped to try to tell the
teacher why she was running and puked
all over the hallway just today I had to
phone parents because their child
refuses to use the toilet at school and
today during recess this kid pulled his
snow pants down and proceeded to take
the fattest shit on the snow-covered
playground I'll never forget today not a
teacher but my teacher in grade 5 had to
call my classmates mom because he got
stuck on the toilet how happened to a
classmate of mine when we were in our
first year
proper school she was too small and the
toilet too big and she just couldn't get
out after that I remember seeing one of
those baby toilet seats that you can
place beneath the regular seat which
holds it in place one of the first
graders was so constipated he was
screaming and crying uncontrollably
pacing with his pants around his ankles
in the bathroom it started almost
immediately after drop-off so we called
the mother maybe 15 minutes after she
left she did not pick up or return any
calls until five hours later because she
was long shopping a little girl had a
masturbation problem as in she was
rubbing herself on everything constantly
to the point that it was a serious issue
at the point I had never dealt with
anything like that so I was mind-boggled
I know even babies touch themselves but
I'd never witnessed it and seeing that
behavior in such a young girl made me so
uncomfortable because I was hoping
desperately that she hadn't learned it
in a horrible situation not a teacher
but I used to do presentations in high
schools with women in stem it wasn't
uncommon to meet young ladies who were
interested in the field but didn't have
anyone personally to give them guidance
so I'd hand out business cards
occasionally mentor people and give them
advice on projects one gallon took me up
on the offer and we kept in contact she
sent me some drawings and wiring
diagrams to look at one evening she
emailed me a picture of something she
was building quite clearly in the
background of the picture was her in her
underwear reflected in a mirror I
emailed her back alerting her to her
mistake and telling her to be extremely
careful as it's hard enough for a woman
to be taken seriously in the field the
way it is received another image shortly
that was much more explicit and included
a letter detailing how I couldn't deny
our chemical attraction I immediately
cut off contact with her blocked her
number she created some alternate email
accounts and kept trying to contact me
got to the point where she was calling
my office and asking for me so I let my
boss know what was up and I decided to
call her parents
so I straight-up outed this poor girl to
her parents who didn't believe me at
first after talking to their daughter
they called and apologized and said it
was
taken care of that's the last I ever
heard from her I looked her up a bit ago
and it looks like she's an Emmy with a
girlfriend so see seems to be doing all
right not a teacher but a kid in my
class started bragging about how he had
two moms and everyone else sucked
because they only had one he opened
himself up to double the yo mama jokes
yo mama's so fat she counts as two
people not a teacher but someone was
caught watching porn on his school
computer and his parents had to come
pick him up after he came back he told
us what happened and what his parents
did as a punishment and he told us that
they just laughed at him because nothing
is more embarrassing than that my
teacher had to call and apologize to my
mom after she told me she wouldn't let
me go to the nurse because I was always
asking so I threw up on her desk in
front of the whole class power move
would be more if she had to clean it up
my parents were called when I was in
eighth grade because I would only talk
in third person
it went on for like five weeks I had to
explain to a parent that although Family
Guy is a cartoon it was not appropriate
for an eleven-year-old he was quoting
the pervy old character to other kids in
his art lesson and creeping them out
Family Guy lolwut
yep Family Guy the other 11 year olds
were totally weirded out by what he was
coming out with but I used to watch it
years ago so recognized enough to ask
him and work it out I was dreading
calling his mom about it but luckily for
me I didn't have time before the weekend
and in the meantime she had overheard
some of it and realized it wasn't
age-appropriate she'd just seen a
cartoon and assumed so it was as an
embarrassing phone call as it could have
been
not a teacher but a parent my
five-year-old kindergartner decided to
drop his pants and show his friends his
crank the second week of class that was
a fun call to get from the wife who had
just gotten off the phone with the
principal of course me being a dad I
started laughing and wife was mad long
we had a talk with him and he understood
the reason he got in trouble five year
old or something my son's teacher pulled
me aside today at pickup to let me know
that my kid was playing doctor with his
classmates this afternoon I was thinking
it involved something like your son's
story but nope he was vaccinating other
students with thumbtacks tetanus shots
for everyone used to be a teacher first
semester rookie year I saw three of my
high school students huddled
uncomfortably close I wandered over to
see what the suspicious activity was
when asked what they were doing one of
them responded with watching porn I must
have gotten a quicker bullshit look on
my face because one of them turned the
phone to me and yup there was a set of
tits and eventually a very small naked
woman who looked quite good for being
confined to a 1-inch Nokia screen I
called my boss to ask her to come get a
cell phone some boys were using in class
she'd been teaching for at least 20
years and was currently an assistant
principal as she'd have much easier time
dealing with the situation than a rookie
teacher still wet behind the ears that
was a little embarrassing and I can't
believe I have to do this kind of way I
had a special needs student included in
my class he was 13 very sweet and very
low cognitively he came to me and asked
to see the nurse I asked what was wrong
so I could fill out the pass my wiener
hurts it's pointing down but wants to
point up I sent him for a drink of water
instead of the nurse he came back a few
minutes later much relieved the water
fixed it I called dad and we had a
chuckle dad promised to give him as much
of the talk his son could handle
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