Even with a steadily declining divorce rate,
some marriages still fall apart.
But thankfully, scientists, sociologists,
and other marital experts have discovered
a set of risk factors that may lead to a nasty
split.
Here are the top reasons why your marriage
could fail.
"We were perfectly happy before we decided
to live happily ever after.”
“Guess the joke's on us.”
Moving too fast
When it comes to finding "the one," people
like to say you'll know.
But social psychologist Dr. Theresa E. DiDonato
tells Psychology Today that it's all about
how you feel about your partner.
Do you want your friends and family to like
him?
Do you miss her when you're apart?
"I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager
to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation.”
But even if you're sure you've found your
soulmate, don't go rushing down the aisle.
"What?
Hello we didn't get married.”
“We didn’t get married, that’s ridiculous!”
Data scientist Randal Olson compiled findings
from researchers at Emory University who discovered
that dating for at least three years was shown
to be a real protection against divorce.
Waiting too long
So, is it really possible to wait too long
to get married?
According to statistics, yes.
"We're in our thirties buddy, if we wanna
have a kid that's not all jacked up, we better
get to steppin.”
Data from the National Survey of Family Growth
revealed that waiting until the age of 32
to get married might be too long.
"True love is hard to find.”
According to the study, every year leading
up to your 32nd birthday reduces your risk
of divorce by 11 percent.
"Alright, I like my odds here.”
After 32, the divorce rate increases by 5
percent, every year.
So if you're looking to set a date for your
upcoming nuptials, 31 looks like the magic
number.
Wedding guest fail
"Weddings.
They bring everyone together.”
Olson's findings also revealed a red flag
that could be seen from very early on: your
wedding day.
"Whoo-hoooo!”
Data shows that the more people you invite
to your wedding, the less likely you are to
get divorced.
Couples who elope are over 12 times as likely
to split up than a couple who invited 200
or more people to their big day.
Olson says this shows that having a large
support group positively affects the success
of the marriage.
"We don't want you showing up stag and riling
each other up.”
“We don't rile each other up!”
“We never get riled up!”
But, speaking of who gets to bring a plus-one…
Blowing out your budget
"Marriage is what brings us together today.”
How much you spend on your wedding reveals
a whole lot about the future of your relationship,
according to Olson.
"We have much preparation to do, and very
little time.”
It may seem impossible to do, but spending
up to $1,000 on your big day is actually the
sweet spot for marital success.
"I'm thinkin eyebrow triage, root crimps,
maybe some eyelid tape.
What do you think?”
“Ugh.
All of it.”
Couples who spend $20,000 or more, are three
and a half times more likely get divorced
than those who spent half, or less, than that
amount.
Olson warns,
"In other words, Bridezilla = Divorcezilla.
Don't let advertisers fool you into spending
your life savings on your wedding."
Banking on looks (and money)
"I've got moves you've never seen.”
What was the first thing that attracted you
to your partner?
Was it his warm smile?
Her sparkling eyes?
"I like your hair.”
“I like yours too.
Can I have some?”
Or…maybe it was that loaded bank account.
According to Olson, men and women who place
too much emphasis on how good-looking their
partner is, or how fat that weekly paycheck
might be, may be headed for Splitsville.
"So you're family's rich?”
“We're comfortable.”
“That is exactly what a super rich person
would say.”
Studies show that men who find looks important
are 1.5 times more likely to get divorced,
and women who place importance on their partner's
wealth are 1.6 times more likely to throw
in the towel.
"You heard him girls.
Party's over.”
And, yeah, speaking of banking on a breadwinner…
Who brings home the bacon?
"I guess I'm just taking a break.”
According to a 2016 Harvard study, a husband
that isn't employed full time links to a higher
risk of divorce.
"You have to have a j-o-b if you wanna be
with me.”
Studies found,
"Expectations of wives' homemaking may have
eroded, but the husband breadwinner norm persists."
"That's awesome.
Wait, what?"
And a 2015 study found men and women often
consider their marriages quote "less satisfying,"
if the wife is the primary earner.
"Let's go get that morning meeting.”
Feeling the heat
The American Psychological Association puts
stress into three categories: acute, episodic
acute, or chronic.
"I'm doing my best not to let it get to me.”
“Is it working?”
“No.
It's not."
Acute stress is the most common, and according
to the APA,
"It comes from demands and pressures of the
recent past and anticipated demands and pressures
of the near future."
A study from the International Association
for Relationship Research also revealed that
stress resulting from daily trivial events
led to participants' decision to divorce.
"That's not good.”
We'll let you discuss that one after you finally
decide what to watch on Netflix tonight.
