-Woomba. It's a robot,
and it cleans my business.
My lady business.
And I like that.
♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪
-I needed a birth control
that could keep up with
my lifestyle.
-I wanted a birth control
that takes a limo,
not the city bus.
-'Cause I could deal
with cramps,
but not something
cramping my style.
-That's why we chose
NuvaBling.
-The discreet yet
diamond-encrusted ring
that inserts neatly
into the vagina.
-Looking for a birth control
that's as sexy as you are?
Then why not reach
for NuvaBling?
NuvaBling provides a continuou
low dose of hormones
and a mega-dose of faboosh
-It's pizzazz that slides
right up into my choach.
-NuvaBling is 70% effectiv
at preventing pregnancy
and 100% effective
at getting dat swag on.
Plus, you can customize
NuvaBling
by adding your own fierce
and glamorous charms.
And instead of throwing
NuvaBling away each month,
you can reuse it as jewelry.
-Did you get those
earrings at Tiffany's?
-Close. I got them
from my vagina.
[ Laughter ]
-So wow up that womb.
-Glam up that clam.
-And shine up that 'gine.
-With NuvaBling!
-Say goodbye to the same old
birth control
with NuvaBling.
-And, yeah, it does hurt.
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
[ Rock n roll playing ]
[ Wolf whistle ]
-Back in the day, things wer
a whole lot simpler.
Back in the day,
cars weren't complicated.
Neither was anything else.
[ Rock n roll playing ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Hip-hop beat plays ]
Introducing Kotex Classic.
-This is the original.
♪♪♪♪
-This is your mother's p
♪♪♪♪
-I always know it's there.
♪♪♪♪
-You can't beat the original
-Them girls are old school
♪♪♪♪
-Confidence.
♪♪♪♪
-I love the belt.
It's so complicated.
-I love the snaps!
-This one's a classic.
Kotex Classic.
♪♪♪♪
-Kotex Classic.
The next big thing.
[ Laughter ]
[ Applause ]
♪♪♪♪
-When I feel fresh,
I feel confident.
-When I feel clean,
that's when I'm at my best
-My life is hectic enough.
I don't have time to worry
about feeling refreshed.
-All across the country,
thousands of women
are discovering the next
generation of freshness
with Woomba,
new from the makers of Roomba.
[ Whirring ]
The first fully automated,
completely robotic
feminine hygiene product.
-[ Gasps ]
-Woomba -- it's a robot,
and it cleans my business --
my lady business.
And I like that.
-Woomba is a small, disk-lik
object that takes care
of all your
feminine hygiene needs.
-Activate Woomba,
and it does the rest.
[ Whirring ]
Woomba's built-in sensors
can tell when you're not
at your freshest,
and that's when Woomba
goes to work.
Its gentle but powerful
onboard cleaning agents
assure results
every time.
-[ Robotic voice ]
-[ Gasps ]
-Once Woomba is activated,
it is entirely self-sufficient
It cannot be turned off.
[ Whirring ]
-[ Indistinct robot voice
♪♪♪♪
-Woomba will address your
feminine hygiene needs
whenever and wherever
it thinks it's best.
That's the confidence you ge
from Woomba.
[ Whirring, robotic voice
-Woomba --
the little pink robot
that cleans your noonie.
-From the makers of Roomba
-What if you could have
your period just once a year
-My period once a year?
-Once a year?
I'd like that.
-New Annuale extends
the time between your period
by 11 months.
-How does it work?
-Each Annuale pack has
44 weeks of active pills,
instead of the usual 3,
keeping you on a constant
stream of hormones
so your time of the month ca
be just once a year.
-That's all I have time for.
-And when it is time
for your period,
hold on
to your [bleep] hat...
[ Screaming ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Laughter ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Screaming ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Screaming ]
♪♪♪♪
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Shrieks ]
-Annuale's not for everyone.
Do not take if you are using
MAOI inhibitors
or if your occupation requires
you to operate heavy machinery
Do not take Annuale if you pla
to ever become pregnant,
as it may turn your baby
into a fire monster.
In the days around your period
you may develop
a leathery tail.
Annuale may cause you to
develop a second vagina.
Notify authorities in your tow
when your period is imminent
as they may want to incarcerat
you preemptively
like a wolfman.
-Ask your doctor if Annual
is right for you.
-And if she says it is,
go to a store, buy a hat,
and get ready to hold
the [bleep] onto it.
[ Laughter ]
-We're not kidding.
-Annuale.
Once a year. Period.
Oh. That's a play on words
I just got that.
-Shut up!
Ohh, here it comes!
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Crisp weather.
The crackle of leaves
underfoot.
Cuddling up in your
favorite sweater.
Fall is officially here.
[ People shouting ]
Which means it's finally
time to enjoy
all those uniquely fall
flavors and scents,
everywhere from your coffe
to your candles.
But what about your
feminine products?
From the makers
of Summer's Eve
comes Autumn's Eve
Pumpkin Spice Douche.
The first intimate-care wash
with all the bold,
spicy flavors of fall,
because nothing says "clean"
like warm, gooey pumpkin
and hot, itchy cinnamon.
-Finally, my intimates can
have that warm, inviting scent
that reminds you of your mom
My husband loves it.
-Thanks to Autumn's Eve,
now my personal area
can smell like Thanksgivin
all season long.
And that's something we can al
be thankful for.
-Why should your mouth h
all the fun?
[ Chuckles ]
[ Laughter ]
-So hurry over to your local
pharmacy or farm stand
and pick up Autumn's Eve
Pumpkin Spice Douche.
[ Soft music plays ]
Autumn's Eve --
from the makers of
St. Patrick's Eve
Shamrock Douche
and Christmas Eve
Peppermint Douche.
-Ooh!
♪♪♪♪
