>> HELLO.
>> Jimmy: HELLO.
HOW ARE YOU?
>> I'M VERY GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> Jimmy: I'M DOING WELL.
THANK YOU FOR HELPING WITH THE 
LIST.
>> IT WAS A PLEASURE.
>> Jimmy: IT ADDED CREDIBILITY 
TO THAT.
>> I DON'T KNOW THAT IT ADDED 
CREDIBILITY BUT IT'S THE FIRST 
TIME I REALIZED I'VE EVER COME 
OUT BEFORE A SEGMENT ON A TALK 
SHOW.
>> Jimmy: IS THAT RIGHT?
>> I THINK SO.
>> Jimmy: IT'S ALMOST LIKE YOU 
WERE MY CO-HOST FOR A REASON.
>> IT WAS BRIEF.
YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE A MONITOR 
THAT'S ON THE GROUND.
IF YOU DON'T DO A LOT OF TV OR 
WHATEVER, A SITUATION LIKE THIS,
MONITORS EVERYWHERE AND YOU'RE 
ON THEM, IT'S REALLY LIKE SEEING
A MIRROR AND YOU'RE LIKE WHAT DO
I LOOK LIKE?
EVEN BEING ON TV I FEEL LIKE I 
STILL DO IT.
JIMMY'S LOOKING UP AND I'M 
LOOKING DOWN.
I CAN SEE IT.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY, 
WHEN WE HAVE KIDS ON THE SHOW OR
MONITORS, JUST A TV SCREEN OR A 
REALLY DUMB CELEBRITY, WE WILL 
HAVE TO -- WE DIDN'T ANTICIPATE 
THAT YOU WOULD FALL INTO 
THOSE -- 
>> IT APPLIES TO ALL OF US.
YES.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU BACK TO WORK 
ON THE "THE BIG BANG THEORY" 
RIGHT NOW?
>> TABLE READ TODAY.
>> Jimmy: WHAT SEASON IS THIS?
>> 11.
>> Jimmy: 11 SEASONS.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> OH, MY GOD.
>> Jimmy: EVERYONE SHOWED UP FOR
THE TABLE READ?
>> EVERYONE SHOWED UP.
EVERYONE LOOKED BASICALLY THE 
SAME.
WE HAVE ONE PREGNANT CAST 
MEMBER.
MELISSA.
WHICH I'M HAPPY ABOUT IT.
SHE'S SO TINY IT LOOKS LIKE SHE 
OVERATE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I DON'T KNOW.
IT'S CRAZY WALKING IN FOR THE 
11th YEAR.
IT'S A REALLY SEVERE BIT OF 
ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT, I HAVE TO 
TELL YOU.
I KNOW THERE'S A PART OF MY 
BRAIN THAT'S JUST LIKE IT DOES 
NOT UNDERSTAND THAT I WAS 33 AND
I'M NOT ANYMORE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
>> SURE.
YEAH.
>> LIKE THIS SHOW'S GOING TO END
AT SOME POINT AND I'LL BE LIKE I
CAN'T WEAR THIS ANYMORE.
I AM AN OLD MAN.
>> Jimmy: LIKE THE T-SHIRTS 
AND -- 
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE DOING TWO SHOWS
RIGHT NOW, RIGHT?
>> WELL, I'M ACTING IN THAT ONE.
AND THEN I DO VOICE-OVER AND I'M
AN E.P. ON "THE YOUNG SHELDON 
SHOW."
WHICH IS -- 
>> Jimmy: HOW OLD IS THE YOUNG 
SHELDON?
>> THE ACTOR'S 9.
>> Jimmy: HE'S 9.
YOU HELPED CAST HIM?
>> YEAH.
WE WERE WATCHING -- THEY WROTE 
THE MOST TRIAL BY FIRE LENGTHY 
HORRIBLE -- NOT HORRIBLE, IT WAS
FUNNY, BUT A TWO-PAGE MONOLOGUE 
AND ALL THESE KIDS WERE COMING 
IN WITH IT.
AND THEY WERE ALL REALLY GOOD.
BUT THEY -- IAN.
IAN IS THE KID WHO'S PLAYING 
SHELDON.
AND HIS TAPE CAME IN.
IT WAS JUST KIND OF 
MIND-BLOWING.
AND I THOUGHT, OH, HE LOOKS 
REALLY YOUNG BUT HE MUST BE LIKE
13 OR SOMETHING TO BE ABLE TO DO
THIS.
HE WAS 8.
HE WAS 8.
HE IS SUCH A MANCHILD.
HE'S LIKE -- HE THINKS LIKE A 
MAN.
BUT THEN HE'S JUST A KID.
>> Jimmy: WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE 
THINKS LIKE A MAN?
BECAUSE THAT COULD BE DANGEROUS.
>> NO, NO.
DO NOT TWIST THIS ON ME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
THIS IS NOT A DIRTY STORY.
YOU ARE HORRIBLE.
YOU'RE A GUTTER.
HE -- I'LL TELL YOU WHAT IT IS.
HE LIKE -- WHEN WE FIRST STARTED
WORKING TOGETHER, HE WOULD BE 
LIKE -- LOOK.
THERE'S A CERTAIN COMPLICATION 
IN SHELDON, ESPECIALLY FOR A 
CHILD, WHICH IS -- AND 
ESPECIALLY FOR A SMART 
EMPATHETIC ACTOR LIKE IAN IS.
HE UNDERSTANDS THINGS.
HE READS PEOPLE'S EMOTIONS WELL 
AND HE LISTENS WELL AND HE'S NOW
PLAYING A CHARACTER THAT'S NOT 
SUPPOSED TO ALWAYS BE ABLE TO DO
THAT.
AND SO EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE 
THEY'D HAVE ME KIND OF READ 
THROUGH A SCENE, LIKE HE COULD 
LISTEN TO ME DO IT.
AND I THOUGHT I DON'T WANT TO 
GIVE HIM LINE READINGS.
THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE.
THE KID IS NOT A MIMIC.
YOU CAN WATCH HIS LITTLE BRAIN 
AT WORK AND HE'LL LIKE SAY OH, 
SOMEONE WOULD SAY IT LIKE THAT 
BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT THIS OR 
THEY THOUGHT THAT.
AND I THOUGHT, I'VE NEVER 
THOUGHT OF IT LIKE THAT.
BUT YOU'RE RIGHT.
THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU AT ALL WORRIED
THAT -- 
>> HE'S GOING TO TAKE OVER?
TAKE IT.
RUN WITH IT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: IAN WILL GET ALL THE 
SHIRTS?
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU 
REALLY LIKE THIS KID.
>> OH, HE'S FANTASTIC.
>> Jimmy: SO YOU FORMED A BOND 
WITH HIM.
>> YEAH, AN UNLIKELY BOND.
I DIDN'T THINK I WAS VERY GOOD 
WITH KIDS.
BUT I'M FINE WITH THEM.
IF THEY'RE SMART AND TALENTED.
THE REST OF THEM I'M LIKE NO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: IF THEY CAST THEM TO 
BE AS MUCH LIKE YOU AS POSSIBLE.
>> HE'S SUCH A SWEET KID TOO.
HE WANTED TO GET ME A GIFT FOR 
OUR WEDDING, ME AND TODD.
>> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS, BY 
THE WAY.
>> THANK YOU.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
OFFICIAL.
>> Jimmy: IAN BOUGHT YOU A 
WEDDING GIFT.
>> AN ANT FARM.
>> Jimmy: AN ANT FARM.
>> FOR A WEDDING GIFT.
AND SAID CONGRATS ON YOUR NEW 
CHILDREN.
I HAVE TRIED TO EMBRACE IT AND 
ENJOY IT.
TODD LITERALLY, EVERY TIME WE 
WALK IN THE KITCHEN, WHICH IS 
WHERE I PUT, IT GOES THERE'S AN 
INFESTATION.
HE'S NOT ON BOARD WITH AT THAT 
TIME ALL.
>> Jimmy: THERE ARE BUGS IN YOUR
HOME.
>> THERE ARE.
BUT THEY'RE KIND OF FASCINATING.
>> Jimmy: SURE.
THEY'RE ANTS.
>> AND THEY DIE.
THEY DIE WITHIN ABOUT SIX 
MONTHS.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
WE HAD AN ANT FARM AT OUR HOUSE 
ONCE.
>> YOU DID?
>> Jimmy: IT DIDN'T LAST LONG.
AND THE IDEA OF FARMING WOULD 
INDICATE THAT SOMETHING IS 
GROWING.
BUT REALLY THERE'S NO -- 
>> IT'S JUST TUNNELING.
>> Jimmy: THEY'RE JUST THERE TO 
DIE IN THE PLASTIC.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT'S A LITTLE DEPRESSING IN THAT
WAY.
BECAUSE IT'S LIKE YOU'RE WORKING
FOR NOTHING.
YOU'RE JUST KILLING TIME.
LITERALLY.
>> Jimmy: THAT IS TRUE.
>> IT'S KIND OF HEARTBREAKING.
>> Jimmy: THERE'S A METAPHOR IN 
THERE SOMEWHERE.
>> THIS CHILD IS A SADISTIC 
LITTLE THING, ISN'T HE?
HERE'S YOUR BOX OF DEATH.
HAPPY WEDDING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEE
