- [GLADOS] I just thought you would like
to know that a novel virus
is currently ravaging the outside world,
leading to massive unemployment,
amusement park closures,
and a mandatory worldwide quarantine,
but look on the bright side.
Since you're trapped in Aperture
Science Enrichment Center
for the rest of your life,
none of them will have any
effect on your daily routine.
Ha, ha, ha.
(playful music)
(video game warbling)
(siren sounding)
- [Announcer On TV] May
be infected with a virus.
(people on TV laughing)
- [Woman On TV] Virus.
(growls)
- Oh, God.
Bee, bee, beeeeee!
(laser blasts)
- Look, I don't wanna
hear your excuses, Sonic.
I got groceries last time,
so now, it's your turn.
- Ah, come on!
Can't we just Postmates
some chili dogs again?
- No, no, not again.
We only have one bathroom in here.
I will not allow a repeat
of what happened last week.
I still have night terrors.
- Ugh, fine.
I'll risk my life so you
can have some grapes.
Okay, mask on.
Gloves, already on.
I guess into the abyss I go.
- Stop stalling.
- Fine, I'm going.
(Sonic yells)
(Sonic yells)
Oh, God, that was the worst thing ever!
I gotta take a shower.
(water running)
(sighs)
- I wish he'd felt that way
during the chili dog incident.
(playful music)
- You're not hungry, you're bored.
You're not hungry, you're bored.
You're not hungry, you're bored.
You're not hungry, you're bored!
(munching loudly)
(blubbering)
- You're not hungry, you are weak.
(crying and munching)
Oh, so good.
- Hey, Luigi?
- Yes, Mario?
- Remember when I thought
that this quarantine
would help bring us closer together?
- Yes, Mario.
- This is a little too close, bro.
- Yes, Mario.
- Colonel, I've completed
my latest perimeter check.
Currently there's no
sign of enemy movement,
and I'm not picking up any radio chatter.
Might want to check in with Mei Ling just
in case my Soliton Radar is acting up--
- Oh, my God, Snake!
You've called me every hour
for the past three weeks.
For the last time, everyone is at home!
There are no enemies or
Metal Gears out right now.
I get that you're bored,
but you gotta find a hobby or something.
Just please stop calling me!
- So, did you see Tiger King?
- Yes, Snake!
I've seen Tiger King!
Everyone's seen Tiger King!
- Carole Baskin totally
killed her husband.
- I'm hanging up now.
- All right, Trevor, now's your time.
You got this.
Gonna get out there.
Gonna steal that car,
gonna make that money,
and if anyone tries to stop
you, bang, they're dead.
Now let's rampage!
(yells)
Huh.
Well, that's a freebie.
(upbeat hip-hop music)
Woo-hoo!
- Whoo!
That was fun.
Hey, everyone, this video
was sponsored by Omaze,
a company that works with content creators
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Bye!
