“When eighteen girls in a small town..."
"We're all gonna get pregnant together!"
"Become the centre of a teenage pregnancy scandal..."
"It will shock an entire nation!"
*Groan* Yep... It’s one of those movies…
“Oh my god! I’m gonna have a baby!”
"This is so bad.”
One of my favourite types of media to review
are movies that try to explore a social issue
or put forward a moral message,
but are so inaccurate, hamfisted, or ridiculous
that they end up being comedy gold.
And some of the best examples in this category
come courtesy of the American cable network,
Lifetime.
I've previously covered Cyber Seduction, the
so-bad-its-good botched cautionary tale
of how staring at pixelated boobies on the
internet will ruin your son’s life,
and why being an overbearing, privacy-invading
mother is completely justified.
And now I’ve found another worthy entry.
And, amazingly, it might actually be even
worse.
2010’s The Pregnancy Pact is another one
of Lifetime’s scaremongering hit-pieces,
guaranteed to send chills up the spines of
all the alcoholic suburban Karens who eat
this sh*t up.
It purports to tell the story of a fictional
pregnancy pact, in which several teenage girls
pledge to get pregnant at the same time,
inspired by a real-life pregnancy pact that
allegedly occurred in Gloucester, Massachusetts
and made national news two years prior.
It’s as melodramatic, sensationalising and
absurd as you’d expect,
and it treats its subject matter with about
as much nuance and realism as Lifetime is
capable of.
And there’s a lot of ingredients in this
sh*t sandwich.
First off, in reality, there was no pregnancy
pact.
18 girls did get pregnant within the same
year, which is a lot,
but there was no agreement between them, and
in fact most of them weren’t even friends.
But their school principal and the media concocted
a story about a pre-arranged pact and it blew
up from there.
And while the film does admit that the pact
it portrays is fictional, it seems like they’re
trying to have it both ways,
adding in just enough reference to real events
to scare its pearl-clutching audience
and stoke the flames of a moral panic that
their innocent daughters could be off conspiring
to make their eggos preggo,
despite this being merely a paranoid fantasy.
And disclaimers aside, both the film’s trailers
present it as an exploration of real events.
“What began as a secret…”
"You can't tell anyone!"
"Became a story that divided a town!"
"MY [should be TIME] magazine is saying your school made a pact to become pregnant."
“Lifetime presents a movie..."
"What were you thinking?!"
"We get to dress them up in cute little matching outfits!"
"That uncovers the mystery behind their motive!"
“Did you want to get pregnant?”
No mystery is uncovered, by the way. Spoiler.
Even more egregiously, characters in the film
repeatedly state that teen pregnancies were
at an all-time high,
which is completely false.
The rate of teen pregnancy was never as high
as the film states, and had in fact been falling
since the 90s and has continued to decline
since.
But let’s not let truth get in the way of
a good scare!
Not even the truth about pregnancy, which
is depicted with appauling inaccuracy.
This “movie pregnancy” is a straightforward
process from conception to completion,
and any physical complications that can arise
from it are almost entirely ignored or handwaved away.
Even girls who are so heavily pregnant that
they’re ready to explode are surprisingly
nimble on their feet,
and no-one complains about tiredness, soreness,
nausea, back pain, acne, mood swings,
or any of the number of other potential side
effects of being a human incubator.
So despite it being in the f*cking title,
they couldn’t even get that right!
And this is rather strange considering the
audience it’s addressing.
You’d think they’d go all in on the fear
factor.
But I guess they didn’t have enough spine
to talk sh*t about pregnancy to an audience of mothers.
But pregnancy is written entirely to serve
the story,
and I have never seen an example of where
biology is so badly warped for the purpose
of plot convenience,
with girls becoming pregnant and showing signs
whenever they need to drive the story forward,
regardless of how little sense it makes or
how much it f*cks up the timeline.
And there’s even some foetal growth rates
so exponential you’d otherwise only find
them in Chernobyl.
Things don’t get any better when the film
looks at teen pregnancy specifically.
Teenage girls get pregnant for all kinds of
reasons,
but this extremely complex issue is reduced
to the level of sophistication of a turd made
of playdough.
The most I could gather is that one girl got
pregnant by accident, then the others agreed
to a pact because they thought it was cool.
With one exception, their motivations are
not explored, and they have no agency, personality
or ambitions beyond:
“I wanna have a baby and be like Britney
Spears’ little sister,
“and we can dress them up in matching outfits
and paint their nails, and have playdates together,
“it’s gonna be totally fetch!”
You think I’m joking?
“I hope we all have girls!"
"Oh my god, that would be so cool!"
KARISSA - "Having a little girl to hang out with,
and be my best friend!"
KARISSA - "We could get little matching 
outfits, and I'd paint her fingernails!"
"I was so stressed about college apps 
and getting financial aid."
“But, now I can just take a 
year off and play with the baby.”
"We get to dress them up in cute little matching outfits and bring them here to the park and play together!"
"I'm gonna cook them dinner every night!"
“So this is what it feels like to be Jamie
Lynn Spears!”
The pregnant girls are universally portrayed
as either idiotic, delusional, grossly irresponsibly
or downright manipulative.
Like holy sh*t, is this insulting!
And while the boys who knock them up are given
a slap on the wrist,
the film places the overwhelming majority
of the responsibility and blame on the girls themselves.
Seemingly forgetting that you gotta have some
sperm to get the job done,
and that knowing how many girls were getting
up the duff,
these boys were still too f*cking stupid to
wear a condom or just ask for a handjob.
Not a single character in this movie is likeable
or sympathetic.
There’s nobody to root for. Everyone is
an asshole in some way.
At least with the paranoid mother in Cyber
Seduction, I could understand where her worries
came from, even if I didn’t agree with her.
But her equivalent in this movie, the Family
Values-abstinence-pushing mother of one of
the pregnant girls,
is so wilfully blind to what’s happening
around her that her arguments have no weight
and she’s turned into an unbelievable caricature.
The proponents for safe sex fair aren’t
treated any better,
making wildly inaccurate statements, and being
guilty of hypocrisy and a lot of questionable conduct.
And the news reporters are depicted as acting
like the worst form of tabloid vultures,
a condemnation which is hypocritical considering
the film is also exaggerating and sensationalising
these events for the sake of views and money.
All this means that the issues and debates surrounding teen pregnancy are presented very simplistically,
explored only at a surface level, and reaching
no real conclusions or solutions beyond saying
“It’s complicated.”
Well, no sh*t it’s complicated!
You could have just farted that repeatedly
for an hour and half, and it would have been
less migraine-inducing than what we got.
I’m only slightly exaggerating, because
I found The Pregnancy Pact to be a very disorienting
and frustrating experience to struggle through.
Not only is the film confused about what it
wants to say and how it wants to say it,
but because of the way pregnancy is essentially
manipulated to fulfil story needs,
the timeline of events makes no sense and
is extremely difficult to follow.
This is made worse by some truly terrible
editing and scene structuring,
jumping between locations and characters without
regard for how much this disrupts the flow
of the narrative.
All these elements mix together to create
a concoction that manages to be equal parts
side-splittingly laughable and
ameurisum-inducingly awful.
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And now let’s get stuck into this garbage
heap.
After opening with some clips of the real-life
news coverage of the events,
we’re taken to our setting of Gloucester,
Massachusetts,
although you won’t hear any Massachusetts
accents, because this was filmed in Louisiana.
Gotta get those tax breaks!
And immediately we’re greeted with multiple
shots of horny teenagers kissing in the High School.
Because one thing always leads
to another, am I right, parents?!
Karissa, one of the girls in the pact, goes
to the school nurse for a pregnancy test,
which comes back negative,
and the nurse just lets her walk away even
when the girl looks quite obviously disappointed.
We cut to another one of the film’s main
characters, played by Thora Birch.
Yeah, Thora Birch - the Empress from the infamous
Dungeons & Dragons movie I covered.
That blew my mind a little bit.
It’d been 10 years since that movie, and it really shows how far her career when down the crapper.
She manages to bring *slightly* more emotion
to this role, though that’s not saying much.
*That* face sums up her
character’s entire personality.
She runs a blog exploring teen issues.
Bear in mind that this was in 2008, and she’s
supposedly able to make a full-time living
and afford her own office and assistant off
of a blog?
I’m gonna have to call bullsh*t.
"So, we have two big stories in the news today."
“One: a woman running for president just picked
up a big state in the primary.”
Oof. Saying this aged like milk doesn’t
quite cut it.
She sees that her old high school in Gloucester
is in the news for its high number of teen
pregnancies, and then an indeterminate amount
of time later, decides to go there to blog
about the issue and find out why it’s happening.
“You wanna come?” “No.”
That’s the most intelligent line of dialogue
in the script.
Back in Gloucester, we’re introduced to
Sarah, another one of the girls in the pact.
Her mum owns a restaurant and is the head
of a local Family Values Council.
"I always make sure my girls were at 
home every night 8 o'clock."
"You and Michael have a curfew for Sara, I'm sure?"
"They make me be home by 9.30, and I'm 15!"
“Carol Redazz's daughter had a midnight curfew. Now she’s asking the council for baby clothes.”
That’s right, Mums - if your daughter’s
not home when the sun goes down,
she’s probably going down on some son.
See what I did there? Huh?
Right on cue, Karissa goes back to the 
nurse, and this time the test is positive.
The girls get way too excited about the prospect
of another sproglett in the brood.
Before returning to families as broken as their hymens.
Sara’s mum is loudly insisting in front
page news articles that teen pregnancy and
contraception are private issues that have
nothing to do with the school.
The nurse protests to the Principal and Assistant
Principle, but the former refuses to hand
out contraceptives,
and thinks that because girls are *trying* to
get pregnant, it wouldn’t make a difference anyway.
But you could at least give them to the boys?
“Look’s like Morreti's got a stalker!" "I hope she has more friends that want to get knocked up!"
Oh right, never mind…
After a few more scenes, Blogger finally arrives.
After how much time? F*ck knows.
But she’s Vlogging while she’s driving
- like the responsible adult she is.
She visits the mom’s restaurant and tells
her about her blog. As if this woman even
knows what a blog is.
The mom repeats her view that the media shouldn’t
get involved because it’s a private matter
between the girl and her family.
Because the families of the girls have done
such a good job up to this point…
While gloating about how great it is to be
a mother and completely ignoring the downsides,
the girls talk about how unreliable men are.
“That’s what guys do, they leave!”
This conversation worries Sarah,
so she decides to get pregnant
in order to trap her boyfriend Jesse into
marrying her and staying in the town with
her forever.
"I love you! We're gonna be so happy!"
Well, this got dark real quick, god damn…
So they bang, seemingly only once, so he must
have had some olympic swimmers stewing down there.
“Swear to God! Noone tells Jesse I made 
this happen, he can’t know.”
Umm, what?! He’s gonna work it out eventually.
Would you rather he thought you f*cked someone
else? What’s your game plan here?
Blogger goes to the school to try to interview
the staff, and bumps into the Assistant.
And it’s awkward as f*ck.
“You’re doing a- a story on teen pregnancy? You?”
“It’s... pretty impactful upon a kid's life, don’t you think?”
Yeah, that was subtle. Do you think
it might be foreshadowing?
Then the nurse and the mom have a debate about
birth control in front of the school council,
a farce which doesn’t do justice to either
side of the issue.
“We' re dealing with teen pregnancy in our 
public schools *after* the fact!”
"Why can't we just prevent it *before* the fact?!"
“But we are! We are preventing it before 
the fact with abstinence programs!”
But that’s so blatantly untrue, given how
many girls are getting pregnant.
But she’s like “no contraceptives, let’s
just set standards for our kids for follow!”
So of course, she later turns out to be a
hypocrite, what a shock.
The school council rejects the nurse’s motion
to provide contraceptives, so she resigns in protest.
And then she disappears from the film.
She doesn’t even try to help the girls in
some other capacity, or raise awareness about
teen pregnancy, f*cking anything!
That’s one of the top-billed actresses - gone
after 20 minutes.
Maybe that was all they could afford.
One of the guys Karissa banged finds out he
might be the father of her baby, and calls
her a “freak”.
He wasn’t meant to find out, since the girls
weren’t supposed to tell anybody.
Didn’t stop them loudly talking about it
in the hallways.
The smell of onions conveniently triggers
Sarah to vomit, thus revealing her condition.
Her dad drags her round to Jesse’s house,
and spills the beans about her being pregnant
to Jesse and his lawyer dad.
All he’s missing is a shotgun.
Jesse’s also pretty pissed about her being
pregnant, thinking that it’s going to ruin
both their lives.
“I should have pulled out every time, or figured out how to get condoms without anyone knowing!”
Or you could have just not f*cked her if you
didn’t have a condom. That was also an option!
The girls get interviewed by Blogger
and act like morons,
talking about how great it’s going to be
and relishing their 5 minutes of fame.
Blogger then interviews Sarah.
“Are you sexually active?”
There’s no way that’s appropriate to ask,
especially when she’s on camera, and when
her mother’s not there.
And this is on school grounds.
It’s heavily implied that noone wants to
talk to her, so it’s extremely unlikely
she got permission to do this.
There’s no way this is okay.
But during the course of this interview, Blogger
finds out Sara is pregnant.
“I already love her so much, but nobody 
else does, and I don’t know why.”
Because your parents are struggling financially,
your conservative mother is now humiliated,
and you’ve put your boyfriend’s future
in jeopardy. And because it’s not THEIR baby!
“Today, I put a faces to the disturbing fact that one in six girls in the United States
"will actually have a child before
she's the age of twenty.”
Again, this is bullsh*t. The scriptwriters
pulled this number out of their arses.
Also, how is she allowed to post this stuff
that she filmed without permission, on school
property and featuring minors, on the internet,
with no repercussions?
She again tries to interview the staff, but
the Assistant refuses to see her
because the Superintendent told them via email
not speak to the press.
So she barges into his office to admonish
him, and he points out how much of a hypocrite
she’s being by using the girls for her blog, thus giving them the attention they so desperately crave.
A couple of scenes later, the principal gets
told to check for the superintendent’s email,
but completely ignores this and
all of his common sense
when a reporter from TIME magazine shows up.
“I suppose I could spare some time for TIME!”
Alright mate, calm down, your boner’s showing.
Meanwhile, Sara and Jesse grow more distant,
and her relationship with her parents becomes
more strained.
“You’re nice to other girls who get pregnant."
"The Council gives them all kinds of stuff, 
why can't you be nice to me?"
"Because you knew better!"
Why does that make a difference to whether
or not you’re willing to help her? What the fuck?
The girls get interviewed by Blogger again,
having another opportunity to show off their stupidity,
bragging about drinking while pregnant, and
saying they know what motherhood will be like
because they have younger sibilings.
Because that’s totally the same thing.
“Everyone's acting like we're too young to have a kid."
"But in the old days, girls our age always 
had kids, so it can't be that bad!" "Yeah!"
Yeah, well- I mean it was fine when they 
weren’t dying in childbirth.
GIRL - “I mean, Mary the Mother of Jesus
was only fourteen, right?”
“BLASPHEMER!”
Another girl wants to buy condoms but is too
embarrassed, so Blogger goes in to buy them for her.
Don’t condoms usually come in a box?
Who sells them like that?
Also, is is just me, or is it not inappropriate
for her to be buying her condoms?
“Yeah, well, every my age [sic] is doing it.”
“Not everyone. In fact, not even most everyone.
Pretty sure half of them are lying about it.”
Wh-why’d you point to them when you said
that? What’s that supposed to mean?
Sara and Jesse find time to hang out again.
He wants to go to college and play baseball,
but she wants him to stay here with her.
So she’s basically trying to emotionally blackmail
him into giving up his hopes and dreams.
At a meeting of the Family Values committee,
Blogger points out how ridiculous it is for
them to want to raise $13,000 for a single
slot at the school’s daycare,
when they could hand out condoms for about $2,
but refuse to do so. Which is a fair enough point.
“Sara is very lucky to have you to help her and her baby. But not all young girls have that kind of-"
Aaaand you ruined it.
Blogger meets the Assistant at a coffee shop.
Turns out she got pregnant at 16 and got rid
of their baby, something he’s still unhappy with.
So he makes it all about him and how she doesn’t
feel what he wants her to feel.
“Hey, if we hadda gotten married,
you know, we’d be divorced by now!”
“Or deliriously happy, one or the other.”
Dude, you have a beautiful wife and two kids,
you really shouldn’t be saying this?!
“I’m trying to help these girls!"
"I'm trying to help so that maybe not so many
of them have to go through what I did."
“You didn’t have to go through with what you did!”
Yeah because raising a kid as a 16-year-old
is such an easy option.
But honestly, they’re both arseholes, and
the argument ends accordingly.
“Have you seen the Time magazine story?”
That’s not Time magazine. Did they not want
to buy the rights or something?
So the principal told the Time journalist
that there was a pregnancy pact, and the story’s
now received national attention.
That was quick.
The media’s already there, harassing the
girls for a news story.
“Hey you guys, leave them alone! Those are minors!”
“Can we just get a video of her stomach?”
Yeah, that is creepy as f*ck, but were they
not minors when you interviewed them?
Blogger confronts the girls,
who reveal the truth.
“You can’t tell anyone. You can't tell!”
Yeah, we wouldn’t want this story making
national news or anything…
Jesse is suspicious that Sara was part of
the pact and got pregnant on purpose, but
she lies to him and tells him it was an accident.
Then they use footage of the real-life Mayor
insisting that they have not been able to
confirm the existence of a pregnancy pact,
and that the principal’s memory was foggy
as to who told him about it.
The fictional principal later tries to have
it both ways,
giving a press conference where he says that
he believes that what he said about the pregnancy
pact was accurate,
and passes the buck to the Mayor, but then
at the end refuses to say whether there was
a pact or not.
He never reveals who told him about the pact,
and we never find out.
So as far as we know, he just made it up,
which is what actually happened,
but the way it’s presented here, it’s like the film is throwing the Mayor under the bus.
If I were her, I’d have been pissed.
Meanwhile, Sara goes with her mom to get an
ultrasound, which she then shows to Jesse.
“There’s his little head, and it's little arms and-”
NO! NO! NO! NO!
She’s been pregnant for - at most - a couple
of months.
It makes *no* sense that the foetus is that
large and developed.
This is like that freak baby from Twilight.
Oh, and that bump she’s possibly
starting to show there?
It’s gone in the next scene, of course.
Some asshole reporter trespasses on Sara’s
family’s land to try to interview them,
and things get physical when Jesse and Dad
tell him to f*ck off, and they both get arrested.
“Why did you girls do what you did? I mean, 
why did you want to get pregnant?”
“If you want to finish High School? Go to 
college? Start a career?”
"None of that stuff matters to me. All I need to make me happy is marry Jesse and have a kid!"
Which would be fine, if any of the other teen
mums were portrayed as having *some* ambition.
“But Sara, you’re such a bright girl! Is-”
No, she isn’t! At what point has she demonstrated
that she’s intelligent, either to you, or anyone else?
At this point they find out that Rose - the
ringleader of the pact - has given birth.
She had to have 37 stitches “down there”
because she tore badly.
This is the first time they seriously show
the potential physical consequences of a pregnancy,
without merely dropping it into conversation.
“John! Is the baby okay?”
“I guess. They put her on an incubator-thing.”
Like, on top of the incubator?
And it’s a bit weird that she’s has been
left to recover in a part of the hospital
that’s this open.
And why are non-relatives permitted to visit?
Why are Blogger and the girls
even being allowed in there?
Sara looks in on Rose’s baby, which is very
blatantly stock footage.
They weren’t even trying, were they?
Blogger tries to convince Sara to
come clean about the pact,
because she thinks it’s unfair that the
principal is taking the fall for all the controversy,
which is stupid because this media circus
is entirely his fault,
and Sara admitting to a pact would just make
the situation even worse.
“And then you can safely come out say that
‘Yes, there was a pact!’ And then maybe we can mo-"
Oh no, another plot contrivance!
If that’s where his car was, surely he would
have seen them when he got out to go to the
restaurant to look for her…
WHAT?!
Karissa’s mum - who is deeply unhappy at
her daughter following in her footsteps
and until this point was almost approaching
being the only reasonable character
now has no problem dropping her pregnant daughter
off at a party that is very obviously full
of other pregnant girls drinking.
Maybe she’s hoping her daughter’s problem
will be “taken care of”, if you catch my drift.
Noone here looks to be of legal drinking age,
except maybe this guy who’s on his seventh
repeat of Freshman year.
And this guy who looks like he’s here to
pick up Freshmen.
This is happening in broad daylight, and none
of the adults are doing anything about it.
Where are the cops?! Why aren’t those news
crews reporting on this?
What the f*ck is this script?!
And you really don’t need to be that well-educated
to know that drinking alcohol
is bad for expectant mothers,
so why aren’t any of them objecting?
This movie makes teenagers look horrendous!
Sarah’s parents, now knowing about the pact,
give her a dose of reality, pointing out how
bad her actions were,
and she responds like the whiny self-absorbed
brat that she is, and storms out to find Jesse.
When she does, he publicly berates
her for lying to him.
“I only did it because I love you!”
Yeesh… That’s some bunny boiler level sh*t.
"Really thought we'd be together forever! I really did!"
“But you ruined it. It is all ruined
because of you!”
I’ll repeat, it takes two to tango, dude.
You’re the one that f*cked her without a
condom when you could have settled for a blowie.
And then she takes a swig from a bottle of liqueur.
And again nobody does anything about it.
Blogger goes to Sara’s house to apologise
to her, and runs into the Mum as she’s leaving,
presumably for work.
They have a mud-slinging argument that doesn’t
go anywhere,
as Blogger is still hamfisted with how she
goes about asking questions, and the mom buries
her head in the sand.
And then she goes back in the house. I guess
she didn’t need to go to work, after all.
Blogger then does another vlog where she tells
the story of how she fell in love at 16, didn’t
want to wait, and ended up getting pregnant.
She lied to her boyfriend (the Assistant),
telling him that she’d had an abortion.
Then she lied again and said the father was
unknown, and gave the baby up for adoption.
Not that she’s ever apologised to
him for all those lies.
The drunk girls somehow manage to drive 
themselves to the mum’s restaurant.
And Sarah has passed out in the back seat.
She gets taken to a hospital, and is lucky
to still have the foetus given that she nearly
drank herself into a coma.
Sara realises how badly she f*cked up, and
her mum confesses that she and her dad didn’t
wait until marriage to bone, despite everything
she now preaches.
I would never have guessed that was coming.
The Assistant goes to meet Blogger again,
and they do actually realise they’ve both
been stupid and achieve some closure before
they say goodbye, so that’s nice.
On a less pleasant note, Rose is having problems
bonding with her baby, who refuses to breastfeed.
*FINALLY* we’re shown that babies aren’t
all glitter and sunshine.
“Don’t yell at the baby! It’s not her fault
you don’t know what you’re doing.”
Remember teens, if you’re a bad mother,
it’s all your fault!
“We need to find a better way to get our
abstinence-before-marriage message across.”
Okay, that makes sense, but then she says:
“Birth control may not be a choice that I 
would accept in my home. But we can’t
stand in the way of schools offering 
contraception to the families that want them.”
But surely that contradicts your abstinence
message and it still doesn’t solve the problem
of kids actually wanting to get pregnant,
like your own daughter! Remember?!
Blogger tells Sara she spoke up in defence
of her mom, having learned that teen pregnancy
is complicated.
What a character arc…
But neither of them have proposed any solutions.
During the ending, we’re shown that the principal has resigned, claiming he was scapegoated
by the mayor,
even though he’s the one who made up the
pregnancy pact story and brought all the media
attention in the first place.
The sh*tty families are still sh*tty.
And Jesse has definitively left Sarah and moved on,
while Sarah has decided to keep her baby.
BLOGGER - “What we need to do now is 
have a real conversation
"about how to help young women make 
more informed choices for themselves."
"And how to help them succeed as mothers 
if their choice is to have a child.”
But you shouldn’t be encouraging their choice
to have a baby at 15, that’s the point, isn’t it?
Isn’t it?
What is this film trying to say?!
The thing is, pregnancy - especially teen
pregnancy - *is* very complicated.
Every pregnant woman experiences it differently
and its impact and implications vary widely.
That’s why it’s difficult to portray these
issues accurately and profoundly.
The Pregnancy Pact had the opportunity to
do that, but not only failed miserably,
but it feels like they barely even tried,
only paying lip service to the task,
instead resorting to melodrama and scaremongering
nonsense while offering no meaningful messages
or concrete solutions.
This movie is an insult to everything it involves.
It’s an insult to mothers, pregnant girls,
teenagers, adults,
any and all commentators on teen pregnancy
and sexuality, and even to its own audience.
Because even they can’t be stupid enough
to fall for this tripe.
If you want a film that explores teen pregnancy
with far more subtlety and sensitivity,
check out Juno instead.
It’s hardly perfect, but at least it won’t
make you want to punch yourself in the uterus.
And to all the Karens of the world, if you
want to stop your teen daughter from wanting
to get pregnant, don’t subject
them to this garbage.
Just buy them Animal Crossing.
They’ll never leave the house again .
“But these girls feel a sense of purpose
being pregnant."
"And what are they supposed to
do about it now, anyway?”
[Sextine Aquafina - 'Get Dat Fetus Kill Dat
Fetus']
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