 
Watching Hugh Grant and his
Stuttering pathetic charm is as
Appealing to me as closing my
Scrotum in a DVD case.
Are these real or do you
Make them up to be especially nasty?
 
Kate Hudson is a dead-eyed
Trash bag that smells like low tide.
 
 
Greg Kinnear
Stars in holy [BLEEP] who
Gives a [BLEEP] coming soon.
Chris Evans is a stupid
Bearded sweater wearing dumb
Dork.
Melissa McCarthy is the Medea
of white people.
Jane Lynch had bigger
[BLEEP] than Ultimate Warrior.
Norman Reedus, I can fit two
Firsts and a leg in my [BLEEP].
Hit me up.
Okay.
I'll do it.
Tongue punch in the fart box
is a neglected phrase.
Use it today.
Example: Margot Robbie deserves
a tongue punch in the fart box.
Wow.
Anthony Mackie is probably.
Angry that he looks like a
[BLEEP] Aardvark.
Judd Apatow has completely
ruined manhood.
Olivia Wilde's forehead is
the same size as my left ass
cheek.
and I weigh 250 pounds.
So I'll let you imagine just how
big that must be.
Paul Rudd is the most boring.
vanilla dude.
You know he just sits at home
with his wife having a bland
spaghetti dinner, talking about
his day.
That's pretty funny.
Why does Ryan Gosling always
Look like he's trying to squeeze
a fart out without making any
noise?
Has Zac Efron ever been in a
Film where he didn't play a
total douche?
I've never seen one of his
Films, I'm just judging by his
face.
How how I loathe Nickelback.
P.S. [BLEEP] you Wanda
Sykes.
Russell Crowe is delightfully
paradoxical in that he is a huge
[BLEEP] with a small penis.
Bryan Cranston looks like Jim
Carrey impersonating Matthew
McConaughey.
All right, all right,
ALRIGHTY THEN!
I keep forgetting that Kiefer
Sutherland isn't dead.
Well, whoever wrote this, if it
makes you feel better, it's not
for a lack of trying.
Oh, yeah, and [BLEEP] you.
[ LAUGHTER ]
