[upbeat intro music]
hello everybody it is me chaseypoo and
today I'm so excited yes I do this video
once a year and yes it's getting
redundant but it's still a celebration
of my milestone in my life and something
that I like to talk about and think
about so I think it's important to talk
about anyway so before I even go into
this sorry about my hair like literally
it was beautiful this morning it had a
little curl and it was just like a
little wavy it looked really good and
then the humidity level got to like
maybe 7,000 percent so now my hair is
like a big ball of pouf I'm like I want
to put it up but I also want to put it
down because I want like videos of me
with long hair said I have things to
refer to later on in the future when I
don't have long hair or if my hair's
longer I don't know whatever
today is June 16th 2019 alright this
means that as of today actually
technically as of like I believe it was
maybe like 5:00 p.m. 5:00 6:00 p.m. in
the afternoon I got my first
testosterone shot and listen I know nine
years later you're like you're still
obsessed with this you're still obsessed
talking about this because a lot of
people online I've seen who kind of
start the transition online talk about
the transition online they kind of not
make their whole life about their
transition kind of move away from the
YouTube platform I'm not saying I'm
making my whole life about my transition
I do talk about things that aren't
translated and I do review products and
stuff like that but I think it's so
important to show people who are older
aunty like in terms of years to people
who are just starting out because
yesterday I was in the car driving and I
realized I was like wow okay so
tomorrow's my nine years on T and I just
stopped and think that I in stopped the
car I just stopped to think I honestly
that's that's one year away from ten and
I never thought that that was possible
and you want to know why because when I
started t I didn't know anyone who had
been on t for more than five or six
years so I had no one to look up to the
only people that I knew might have been
on t for that long had written books
like the testosterone files and things
like that that like you you can't really
talk to the person and they're just a
book so you have to read the book and
it's their experience in the beginning
not their experience now so I guess I'm
talking to you about my experience now
b9
I'm 28 years old man I started to when I
was 19 and it has been a bumpy road
ahead as I've talked about in many of my
update videos I was on T for a whole
year and then I went off for a little
bit and then I went back on I need to do
that for myself if you are confused as
to why the hell a trans person would
ever want to do that I'll put the video
description link I'll put the link in
the description below so that you can
take a look at my explanation of you
know why I went off T because I
stigmatized as it is I think it's super
important to talk about how we feel
because yeah look the physical changes
are real okay and it's amazing to see
the physical changes but emotionally
alright you don't change personality
it's nothing like that you just you go
through a lot of things emotionally and
we need to create an environment in a
space where that people feel safe
talking about this anyways let's talk a
little bit about changes because there
is this myth okay and to me it's a myth
where it says after five years of being
on testosterone all of the changes that
could have happened happen like nothing
is supposed to change anymore
listen I call BS on that because if you
look at cis men alright or people who
just have testosterone in their bodies
and that's you know the puberty that
they went through and things like that
you see them grow and then as the years
go by people change and it's the same
thing for people who are on estrogen
over who have estrogen like your body
changes and develops so this whole all
of the changes will happen in five years
like most of the changes that are like
whoa in your face will happen within the
first five years but that doesn't mean
that in those changes things are still
going to squiggle around give you an
example I have a lot of issues with
bleeding and that's a thing that like
goes away within the first one to six
seven eight months of starting T and for
me it's been no no none none yes none
none none yes yes and now yes yes yes
every second month which is really
annoying really not common not trying to
scare you I just have a lot of issues
with my testosterone levels and my
estrogen levels usually testosterone
levels like overpower estrogen they're
like we're takin over you however either
my body really likes the testosterone
and really in
races it and sucks it in and then
converts it to estrogen or my body's
like now I'm gonna make more estrogen
than that conkers yes then testosterone
somehow no idea look at the science so
because my hormone levels are kind of up
and down for the last nine years I would
say more for the last four years
um I've had some issues with that maybe
four years ago I had a really hairy
stomach and then I last for like I used
to like trim it and now it is still
pretty hairy but it's not as hairy as it
was and then sometimes it is it's very
interesting like the body really does
change and that's a normal thing and I
think that we absolutely need to embrace
it and have two more things I want to
mention before I go first is growth so
down dere growth down there if you don't
know I'm talking about I'll put links in
the description below of what I am
talking about but not that my growth has
grown more from year 8 to year 9 it's
nothing like that however I'm becoming
more comfortable with my body and more
comfortable with myself in a way where
I'm like I don't really care what other
people think anymore
and it makes me feel more confident in
my growth and in sex and in my own body
and I know that might not make any sense
to you can barely make sense to me but
yeah so as you can see I'm sweating so
the second thing I wanted to mention is
my hair all right so I have been growing
out my hair for a year and I think the
last time I cut my hair for real was in
March or in April of last year of 2018
so that is exciting and my hair is is
long and I did get a haircut like maybe
three weeks ago just to even it out a
little bit cuz it was all over the place
so I am growing out my hair and I have
had some weird comments online and
please if you see these comments on my
videos just like just just mess with
these people because like wait you look
like a girl now why are you growing out
your hair are you d transitioning yes
cuz men aren't allowed to have long hair
at all because there are no men in
history none whatsoever that I've ever
had long hair anyways hair is very
important to me personally from my own
body all right and I have been terrified
since day -1 of testosterone
that I was going to lose all of my hair
and the fact that we are now in year 9
and I have been taking very good care of
my hair as much as I possibly can
i hydrate it I massage my scalp I don't
pull my hair
I really just dab the towel and make
sure not to brush it too much or pull it
back
I don't dye my hair as much as I used to
I don't know if you check any of my
videos but really the last time I like
bleached my hair is a very long time ago
I'm just like taking care and of course
oh my god I'm also on a medication that
I take called finasteride that I take
every single day and that is to help
reduce hair falling out and I've been on
that for maybe four or five years now
and that has been a lifesaver for me so
hopefully when I'm making this video
next year when it's my ten years on t I
can talk to you about my hair again
because there are things I'm very you
know I'm talking you about my body and
how good I feel and I don't care what
other people think but my hair is
different Matt I don't know I have this
thing in my head I just I don't know
people are always asking me like why do
you have long hair why are you doing
that I'm like you know what I rather do
it now and grow out my hair long and
deal with this really awkward phase
where the hair doesn't look that great
but sometimes looks good because one day
I'm not gonna have hair probably and
that's where my brain is automatically
going I'm not going to that negative but
I want to have fun right now while I'm
young so I want to enjoy this hair and
in the future if I lose it all that's
what happens welcome to testosterone but
as of right now my hair looks very
healthy it's very strong and I all right
Ally and I do have one more thing I want
to talk about I've been taking a picture
of my face every single day since June
15 2010 alright that's nine years as of
today well yesterday like that is just
mind-blowing and every single day so of
course every year I put out a video
where I do the comparison of my faces so
I'll just give you like a little of what
I used to look like before testosterone
and what I look like right now so
there's a pretty big difference yeah
sometimes I think about how long ago I
started tea and I'm like
was 19 I'm 28 now like I am close to 30
like that is such a foreign concept to
me because I literally didn't think I
could live longer than like 23 like
there's no future for me like you
graduated high school and then what I
did not know that you can actually have
a future it's like I don't want to just
be trans that's like that sucks like I
don't I want to be able to like have a
life and I have a life and I have a
master's degree in sociology and I do
research I do presentations and I make
videos and I work also part-time at a
running store so like I have a
fulfilling life and I have two beautiful
cats and a partner and I just met if you
were to give me all this information
about my life today to the person who is
19 years old scared shitless by the way
to start testosterone so like totally
normal if you're scared I don't know if
I could've believed you because back
then I didn't know anybody who'd been on
t that long anyways I'm gonna go because
the AC is off the windows are all closed
there's no fan nothin I'm literally
melting I don't know why but I kind of
want to show you my titty I did pass my
six years post off in May so I'll post
that video also in the description below
but yeah here's a little his little
titty you know you can't have a video
with chase without of titties am i right
alright thank you for joining me and I
look forward to talking to you about
this again next year I'm super excited
for my ten years on t I have this big
plan it's just I'm proud of myself and I
don't know what I'm proud of myself for
right now and that's okay
I'm just maybe the the heat is like
making me delirious I'll talk to you
guys later
make sure you watch the video of my
every day picture they'll I'll put that
link down stairs to downstairs okay I
love you bye
