I was actually raised by five sisters.
I was the youngest.
I have
been their errand boy for everything.
I am privy to so much information
that other men don't have.
I have bought more pads than I have
bought condoms in my entire life.
I was the only kid in
Delhi yelling from rooftops.
StayFree available just for 15 Rupees!
What?
Are you crazy?
Wow!!!
It's amazing!!
Before I learnt ABCD,
my sisters taught me PCOD.
See!
Only the women
are applauding at this!
Men have no idea what PCOD is.
They are like what?
PCOD?
Buddy, Period Call Of Duty?
Buddy, Periods Cash On Delivery!
Ohoho!!!
Nope!!!
PCOD stands for
Polycystic Ovarian Disorder.
One out of every three
women in India suffers from PCOD
but men know more about PMS
than PCOD because that affects us.
If I ever had to go for a vacation, the
only thing my dad would ever tell me is
"Whatever you want to do,
after your boards!"
But for my sisters, it was always
"Whatever you want to do,
after you get..."
"Married!"
See how they know the script!!!
That's been fed to them
from the very beginning.
That's why all women are always
looking at their dream wedding
because that's the
day they escape one prison,
only to go into another prison.
I, as a guy can
go with a phone and a wallet
and my entire day is set.
But for my sisters,
it's a bag full of hand sanitizer,
Dettol, extra roll of toilet paper,
just in case!
Number one,
when a lady enters a public restroom
she enters a one-bedroom apartment.
She shuts the door and
she is already stressed.
She has to take out her bag,
put it on this hook,
make sure it doesn't fall down.
Take the dupatta,
put it up on this hook,
so that it doesn't fall down.
Hope nothing happens to my Hidesign!
After they have taken
a moment after so much stress
that they are already in.
After that, they would look at
their arch nemesis inside the washroom
and then wonder.
How the hell will I clean this?
And then, starts this elaborate process.
Hand sanitizer.
Dettol.
Flame thrower.
After removing one
centimetre of that ceramic,
this entire thing is more sterilized
than a Dexter's crime scene.
Even that 0.01% of the bacteria are like,
"Please just come,
you have made a lot of effort, Please.
You have already wiped
out my whole family,
Please just come.
I will go home.
You have made a lot of effort."
Even after then they will not go.
Because my sisters told me there
is another layer of cleaning required,
which is this...
After dressing it up
like a dining table when
your in-laws are coming over,
it is so damn clean, even after that
women will engage their core muscles,
bend forward, unhinge the
knees and without any contact...
Dab dab.
So much effort to go pee!
You know what a guy's
idea of a public restroom is?
A wall!!!
The only thing attached
are urinals which mean
at least aim here sir!
