*I'm a madman*
this video is gonna be a lot a lot I was
live streaming some of my old videos
watching them during a commentary the
link is available there anyway I
constantly wondered about the themes
that I keep coming back to it feels like
I'm sometimes making the exact same
video you know talk about empathy I keep
going back if we can actually change who
we are that's later that's gonna be a
vlog I need
it's funny how sometimes a comment that
you write to be more about you than the
thing that you've watched or commenting
on that's what I found it feels pretty
universal especially when you go around
to look at comments where people are
more angry at a thing that it deserves
yeah or you're a kooky conspiracy nut
that think that lizard's me
I've energy I'm feeling pretty rock and
roll and not just because Fight Club is
mostly rocking online he just took me
about Fight Club but also about Fight
Club I've done videos on Fight Club I've
mentioned them in videos before why do I
keep coming back what is it about my
past that makes me repeat it or repeat
the same topics so I watched my very
first video that put on YouTube not the
very first one the very first one was
the dragon boat on fire that I haven't
found again the first one was the first
one I'm talking about empathy just like
I do now just like I do all the time
just like I did for an entire month as a
theme I've always talked about empathy
on YouTube and then I also complained
about Duke Nukem which my complaints and
complex thoughts about Duke Nukem led me
to write some fanfiction but it was like
anti fanfiction about women escaping
Duke Nukem that's on lazer time.com but
I'm discovering all of these thoughts
and values that I've always had that
have not really been expressed until now
like I knew about feminism before I was
a feminist I believed in it I believed
in concepts that are congruent with
feminism so my sets have changed over
the years
because my life has changed over the
years but it's always kind of the same
setup the same dogging on their vlog
brothers be in a room and talk about
things and sometimes do stuff in
multiple parts which I haven't done
multiple parts in a while because video
essays are on one solid topic all the
way through and everything has to
connect back to the topic or help your
thesis or fight off arguments that of
people that would disagree with you
right
that's an essay but a vlog is a kind of
writing where you do something personal
but video essays essays are but an essay
that you're right that's not very
personal it's pretty boring because I
know that's part of that pact of passion
it's part of it so did you pro put out a
video call about density condensed read
n stuff like that anyways in it he would
say it's a sentence and then have a
whole paragraph on something that that
sense has this implies or for his
reasoning for it
I've always claimed to love dense media
the most to love multi-layered and
conflict and I have a comment on that
video if you subscribe to me and then
watch that video my comment will be at
the top because YouTube's cool and the
people that you subscribe to you appear
at the top of your thing for things you
can look at because they assume you want
to see what these people say YouTube
could be such a better social media
thing you know if that mattered they
cared I was kind of disappointed in
myself
but then I shrugged off that thought
because a lot of times you know we can
think things that aren't necessarily
true because they go with a narrative
like we're we can believe things have to
go they're like oh I've been doing the
same video a hundred times but it's not
you I'm not the same person my ideas and
values happen though I was a preaching
conservative right-wing nut at the time
no matter how much I cared about people
and thought that people should be equal
and thought that people should be nice
and non-judgmental because it is not for
us to judge like no matter what that was
still like a raging capitalist and I
still ignored problems that the Bible
said it was wrong
even though I'm a raging leftist who's
constantly preaching at people
that's just me that's just how I express
my values no matter what they are it's
not the value that made me want to teach
and preach and convince people it was me
all along and I gave her two other
things I give credit you you're taught
to give credit to God for everything as
a Christian you're taught to just so
much there's so much it was so much
wrong but I grew and I changed and you
know when you go and change when you
look back on your old self and you're
like oh look at all those mistakes oh
man look at that terrible thing they did
look at the terrible thoughts they had
I'm disgusted by my past self that is
good and healthy because it shows that
you have grown as a person and I didn't
come up with that right the idea to grow
and change and become better is very
much so an idea that I got from my
Baptist background from reading the
Bible and applying it to yourself I
still have the Bible to apply for good
ideas but it's still the same critical
thought that goes through in order to
make change in order to find things to
change about yourself in order to find
new values to cling to causes to
champion people to love Nirvana and
Fight Club are very close to my
development because at one time I loved
them both and believed in them both to
an extent as far as being
anti-capitalist and Aaron got the system
I saw the flaws they pointed out but I
thought they did me a disservice because
I didn't have anything better to do with
those flaws I still have to live in the
system I still have to be under
capitalism no matter how much corporate
magazines suck as I've grown though I've
been able to accept that there are flaws
in capitalism and also that we can fix
it though they don't just have to sit
there though there are things we can do
about what is wrong with the world and
wrong with our system the first point is
just make people realize they see them
too somehow
the Republican Party and can
has done a massive sway Islander
conservative people to make them think
that the way things are those are the
way things should be and if anything we
should progress to the past because it
was a little better than and it wasn't
it was never better it was never the
past you're thinking of conservatives
hate the poor because Republicans hate
the poor they say they love them they
say that they're there to help the poor
like Christ said but they don't they
hate them in what they say and what they
do in the programs that they put forward
and how they just want to cut off
everything from them and think you
should heard them themselves that is
hating the poor I'm off topic I'm
supposed to be talking about myself this
is why I never despaired from nihilism
because things do matter things have
always mattered to me it's always been
clear I care about my mother I care
about my family I care about my friends
I care about poor people because the
Bible told me to but also because it's
the right thing to do and I am no
different from a poor person and they
did not choose to be there these are my
values this is who I am and it's
informed what I've learned and what I've
said and what I'm trying to do for
always even back in my early youtube
videos probably the biggest disagreement
that I have with a previous YouTube
video is my shouldn't text church's
video my rationale was because we
already text people and all the churches
is a group of people why are we texting
people twice but my view has changed at
a certain point I feel like a church is
more than a cup of people and is a huge
institution especially super churches we
should be taxing the hell out of those
terrible places I hate them I hate any
church with more than a thousand people
what are you doing just stop your evil
I'm sure I know people that go to
churches that more than thousand people
I hate it I hate your bloated crappy
Church so I believe in a lot of things
that would be considered nihilist like I
don't think that how much money we have
matters I don't think that what you do
necessarily matters to like the grand
scheme of things
at the same time other people clearly
met things you do make a difference to
them the things people do make a
difference to you have you ever been sad
or happy
that's because something mattered that
is the opposite of nihilism
I feel like nihilists are just lazy
right like they're like oh your job
doesn't matter what kind of clothes you
have doesn't matter what television
channel you watch doesn't matter what
you vote for it doesn't matter but
that's what they say I feel like they've
just gotten lazy because we have so many
things than like oh nothing matters
nihilism but things do matter things
clearly mattered to people otherwise
they wouldn't have an effect like people
love Rick and Morty but I think people
love Rick on ironically and Rick is a
character that proves that like his
attitude of life is unhealthy and toxic
and bad he's put himself in a terrible
headspace mentally which is nothing to
celebrate and celebrate you've missed
the point of your show but I've
discovered that money doesn't matter
like I was talking to a friend and he
said that we need capitalism because
people will not work without being paid
I saw right through that no one works
for money money is the middleman of
desire people work so they can have a
house so they can have a family so they
can support it so they can buy it so
they can do stuff so they continue
consume people get money so that they
continue doing what they actually want
to do there is a certain point where I
had to decide what I needed and if
getting money was really gonna help me
get what I need I decided to cut out
hours from work for myself so I can do
what I wanted to do so I can do this
so I can write so I can publish and I
would like to do that all the time but
until I can I'm working and I'm sure
there are people that just work for
money that technically don't need it
anymore and could coast but they want
more they want to be rich they're greedy
they want to be rich I think our society
should get rid of money altogether get
that cap because you don't work for
money you work for other desires and
sure some people will be angry that they
can't be rich anymore so what well we
knew off your weird addiction to money
that capitalism is taught what those
people want is to feel better than
everyone else
that they've done something smarter that
they've been able to work harder that
they're more clever because they have
more money or but they're not so they'll
rage and they'll hate the poor people
and they'll say they made bad choices
and they'll say how smart they are
because of how much money they've made
but they're idiots because there are no
better than anyone else I've been
wanting to do something weird like
looking at my videos I had the I had the
desire that I should do make something
weirder that my videos should be weirder
and interesting in that kind of way I
wanted to like I wanted weird angles I
want things to be upside down I want my
the video to zoom in really small then I
want the video just be like in my face
like in my eyes I wanted those I loved
the bit with backwards talking I love I
love making strange videos I just had
this feeling that everything should be a
lot weirder partially to like obscure
the message but also to keep people
watching because people don't want to
watch a vlog they wanted to see whole
screen covered with like a single shot
of anime and I don't like those videos
they get taken down all the time there's
a chance that they'll be copyright claim
you don't get any personality with the
person and then like you're boring you
don't see like what they think you can't
see their eyes and that's why that's why
I always try to record with the camera
shot on my face and like I'll switch to
a clip once in a while or I put an
overlay of stuff but this is what I want
this is what I really like out of it and
for some reason they accepted meta with
essays video essays is that you know you
never see the person's face and that's
dumb it's super dumb no I've been
wanting to make something weird let's
make this camera lower hi is that is
that better is this this might not be
better like you ever wonder we could do
it I wonder if I'm doing all the time oh
no I'm so happy I like I am excited
lately like this morning I did not
expect to be excited and it was cause
like I I saw a topic from
Californication so I work here watching
a couple episodes from Californication
like in bed like well I was trying to
wake up and I just the show was shot
with so much energy like it's about the
sad man who's this sad person but the
way it's shot it's very kinetic it's
very flowing like there's always
somewhere to do and actions having
consequences and like leading to them
there's always somewhere to go in the
show Hank does it like effortless City
and a lot of a lot of times you know
because as an agent he has people that
care about him and it's like he has the
social structure that cares about him I
like keeps him busy that keeps him
moving and doing stuff but life can be
like that too like I feel like my mom is
that kind of person like she's always
doing something she's always busy she
always forgets to do stuff that she
doesn't want to do like read or read the
Bible or read my book or watch a certain
television show she says she's busy all
the time
and those are all her choices she wants
to she doesn't want to like consume
media she doesn't want to take the time
to read a book she wants it to come to
her and in the meantime she's like bam
bam bam bam doo-doo-doo it's just what
she does and like she doesn't have to do
that so prank I've suggested she read a
book she's like honey I just don't have
the time you do you do under the time
you make the time
how you have time for anything as you
make it and you sacrifice things that
don't matter but a lot matters to my
mother and I love that about her and
it's completely normal and like weird at
the same time a little bit of skew and I
tried to vlog for a long time just to
vlog because I looked at what vloggers
were doing and I'm like yeah I can do
that that's easy cuz it was easy
depending on what kind of vlogs they did
like there was a nerd life life berry
there was a bunch of everyday blogs
where they would just film their life
and film stuff they do because there are
busy people like my mother like I'm sure
my mom could pull off a vlog like Casey
Neistat with everywhere that she goes
and moves she doesn't skateboard through
streets but she's driving places she's
going to work I'd watch that you'd watch
that editing she would hate it so much
Casey and I stopped brought editing to
it of course there's always transitions
with the thing about like Casey Neistat
videos is sometimes he goes to the
formula so there's stuff to do and
there's like actual content in his video
whoosh but they can blend together and
people say that it's the same and it is
daily vloggers it's really hard to come
up with different topics all the time
like I'm repeating myself constantly
with these weekly videos right right you
know you see but I don't like repeating
myself I have much rather people
listening to me the first time but when
I repeat stuff like in videos I do feel
like they're different every time
like my grasp on empathy and how far to
expand it is the kind of thing that can
only be expanded upon by watching it by
understanding it by thinking about it a
whole lot and I can only think about
things I can only think about these
concepts
with new depths and new ideas when I
apply them to new forms of media to new
stories to new things that people share
with me and sometimes it's for you
people yelling at me sometimes it's
through comments sometimes it's through
someone else sharing an anecdote and
those are like the things that like
really matter to me the most like when
someone shares something very personal
like various put up his last video
waking up to YouTube and that's a
feeling that I'm familiar with but also
that I've kind of stayed away from right
because I've been on YouTube for seven
years this video is not this video this
channel is seven years old I didn't have
a lot of the things and pressures that
newer youtubers have but but like the
trade-off to that is YouTube looks at my
channel and says that seven years up no
one watches it don't recommend it to
anyone
don't lately I've been thinking about
what really weird things could I do
what weird things haven't I done because
I've done a lot of weird things zero
scrutiny and zero fans leaves me a lot
of room to just experiment and do
whatever like I love h-bomb guy's videos
like one of the videos he births himself
out of a painting and he's covered with
slick like blue Santa and so and he's
covered with some kind of slime and he's
naked and mosaicing himself it's it's
nuts but that's the kind of thing that I
like super love in videos that's the
kind of thing that I'm like like to try
and like to do but not like that exact
thing because you know you just know
that I you just learned that I got it
from someone else then there are things
that I think are weird in a boring and
stupid way like anyone that puts an
emoji in the thumbnail I hate you and
reaction channels reaction videos I hate
them I hate them so much
I'm subscribed to a couple people
because they seemed cool but like then
they transition to what they really want
to do instead of like the
personal things that I liked and I hate
them now
like a llama he did it's a couple kind
of funny vlogs but now he just like does
amino and advertising and I hate it I
hate everything everything he does
actually I shouldn't mention his name
because YouTube sees that they'll
suggest that stuff to me I don't want to
see it I hate him I hate those
explanation videos that have the red
circles and red arrows everywhere well
now I understand there's a red air lie
someone's maybe a guy thing I would
rather get a lot more live stream videos
when they think mistake me for a woman
and my camera malfunction no you're not
looking for the content of someone's
character know one of the point I was
making
oh I'm envious I'm envious of some
people especially when I see that their
video gives like 60 views like in an
hour and what they've done is they've
uploaded for reaction videos within an
hour on a day like not even like spread
out and I even like paste that like you
once a day or reaction video just like
4:00 in the morning posted at the same
time herbage fun nail with a fuckin
emoji on it just reacting the things
like who are you why should I care about
your reaction you're not a cute kid I
don't know anything about you so as this
video about like your views can change
but your personally doesn't and you are
your personality and necessarily your
views capitalism isn't necessary we
don't work for money make YouTube weird
and watch my videos is that what I'm
saying I don't rock and roll kick-ass so
many of the singular topics that I could
do with that have been bothering me
lately have like already been done am I
gonna look up all this junk because like
I restated are even with a friend and he
said that he doesn't benefit from the
existence of libraries and of course he
does you filthy liar and John Green put
our whole video about why libraries
matter to people even though you can buy
stuff from Amazon just cuz you don't use
the line right doesn't mean don't need
is John hungry make that video John the
other thing
all the people defending Nazis like in
acting like Nazis don't exist after
Charlestown which we're very close to
anniversary of we're not allowed to act
like Nazis don't exist
Sean and Jen put out a huge video
talking about how they exists yes
detailing with the footage that they
captured there's live video from these
people from these self-professed nazis
you can't deny it anymore hello everyone
this is a video about the unite the
right rally that took place on August
12th of last year in Charlottesville
Virginia many of you will be familiar
with the general events of the day it
was a rally attended by far-right
figures such as Richard Spencer and
David Duke organized to protest the
removal of a statue of Confederate
General Robert E Lee from a park in
Charlottesville shortly before the event
was scheduled to begin amid violent
clashes between unite the right
attendees and protesters the rally was
declared an unlawful assembly and police
began clear in the park soon afterwards
a white supremacist drove his car into a
group of counter protesters injuring
several people one fatally he was later
arrested and charged with second-degree
murder but there's lots of deflection
attempts at recontextualization and
outright lies don't take my word for it
though I will start looking at those in
a little while but firstly I'd like to
ask a question James Allsop livestreams
the unite the right rally and he uses
clips from his live stream in his video
but he has since taken that stream down
likewise although alt-right figures such
as Baked Alaska web presence at the
rally and Baked Alaska also livestream
the event and has also since taken his
stream down so why did they do this
surely if James also wanted us to see
the truth about Charlottesville he could
have left his unedited stream up on
YouTube you can't get more truthful than
a direct video of the event after all so
my question is what are they trying to
hide luckily there were plenty of
willing cameraman at the rally who have
not deleted their live streams there are
dozens of hours of footage from
Charlottesville from a variety of
different sources online and using those
we can show exactly what happened pretty
much throughout the entire day firstly
though we'll briefly run through the
events that led up to the
rally some points Baked Alaska stream
crosses paths with David Jukes and Baked
Alaska tells him that he loves him by
the way why with the red old face with
me they go ask I honor your courage
another point someone convinces Baked
Alaska to spray soap in his own eyes
which is kind of funny there were a
couple people there with swastika flags
order fjord or Lantern and I was
reviewing the live streams of the events
that about that big Alaska did start in
another night to go before and then I
had an older footage Kazan combined
three Swan surprised three sponsors and
so let's say you know want to fly there
are 10 Nazis there in support so James
also apparently didn't personally see
many swastika flags so that means that
there weren't many neo-nazis at the
event now I could go through the various
videos and streams and find all the
instances of people waving swastika
flags you know there's obviously the one
that also concludes in this video and
here's another one however that would be
the wrong way to answer James all subs
claim because that would buy into the
idea that the only way to spot a
neo-nazi is to see them waving a
swastika flag there were after all lots
of other flags and symbols on display at
the rally so let's take a look at a few
of those first up this here is a Black
Sun flag also known as a Sun and rat
this is the symbol often used by
neo-nazis because it was one used by the
precursors to the neo Nazis the Nazis
here it is on the floor of the former
generals Hall at Will's Berg castle in
Germany and pronounce that wrong which
was operated by Heinrich Himmler's SS
during the Second World War
if you see someone waving a black Sun
flag as a rally
they're basically waving a swastika flag
but they're trying to be clever about it
here it is on a bunch of shields and
this guy seems to have mixed it in with
a confederate flag which is a bit odd
and here's a variance of that flag in a
photo with a group of odd fellows
throwing Nazi salutes and here's another
Black Sun shield in the right of a
photograph alongside some shields
bearing a logo of the white supremacist
group Vanguard America now center in
this photo is James
Alex Fields the person who later drove
his car into the crowd off counter
protesters
stop is less flag this is the flag of
the United States National Socialist
Movement and I hope I don't have to
explain the origins of that name this is
a banner advertising the website the
daily stormer which is named for the
former Nazi propaganda newspaper der
stürmer
or the stormer the daily storm I had
quite a little following going at the
rally a book more on them in a moment so
here's the James also if I would say
this it doesn't matter how many swastika
flags he personally happens to see at
the rally the acceptable amounts of
swastika flags at the rally would be
zero you can't get away with saying well
only some of us were Nazis so how could
you judge just as a group you know the
event was called unite the right if your
tolerance of any Nazis being there at
all you're talking about uniting the
Nazis with everyone else secondly
swastikas aside as we've just seen all
the Nazi imagery was everywhere it was
impossible to miss so either James is so
naive that he does not recognize the
meaning of group names like the National
Socialist Movement and he thinks the
swastika is the only permissible
identifier of Nazi sympathies or he's
attempting to twist the truth to mislead
his audience of course the caucus fan
flag was out about seeing here on one of
the streamers helmets on a dock and the
caucus tan flag is not much more than a
green recoloring of a Nazi flag
proponents of course claim it's all a
joke but there comes a point one if
neo-nazis like your joke flag and start
waving your joke flag alongside that or
the completely not a joke flags maybe
it's time to come up with a better joke
these people really do support murdering
black people Jewish people various other
minorities they don't like and again
don't take my word for it and let's
listen to the rest of what they have to
say and we'll start off by hearing a few
of their chants
so two chants from the torch rally their
Jews will not replace us
self-explanatory that one I should hope
but where are we today we're not allowed
to act like Nazis don't exist
Shawn and Ted put out a huge video
stupid 4chan ups the fort in ops they're
just dumb they're dumb people just
trying to mess up the world because they
think it doesn't matter but it does and
these things do matter film critic put
out a fantastic article about don't feed
the trolls and other horrendous lies
about all these stupid things that we
believe about the Internet but they're
just dumb things
they're counter they they're what led us
to this point now where there are Nazis
anymore there are Nazis now they're
Nazis again I'm saying Nazis all anyone
dose to do has a whole series about the
right-wing playbook talking about what
they're doing and their misinformation
campaign and here's new ones when he's
talking about well in his ship of
theseus video you're first a couple top
of seats touchdown before but how you
can ship of theseus in argument how you
can replace a meaning of a word so when
you say that somebody talks to you that
really means that a contractor that was
once in contact with this person like
their tweet that had someone's real name
in it and you can twist all those
phrases eventually to mean someone talks
to me because they use this language to
take on what they think the left and the
moderate people will care about which is
why probably their biggest insult and
the biggest thing that surround the most
is pedophile because there is no real
insult
they have no values their nihilist but
pen file is the one thing that they can
see people really fighting over and
where they can see people can band over
so they bandy it about they throw it out
there they say this guy is a pedophile
that guy's a pedophile a bunch of goons
is what they are a bunch of goons with
no morals and no values so they have to
bandy about the one thing that they
think people will care about
but of course outside of their
communities they are treated they feel
free to take on the language of this guy
sexist this guy rapes someone even if
it's a lie even if it's completely not
out there even if it's something I
apologized for look like with James Gunn
it's awful these people are awful and I
hate them for Chan is garbage and should
be done with 8 Chan and all those other
garbage nothing places that have to try
to prove that other things don't matter
by messing with them but in the end
they're the ones that don't matter
anyway so anyone dos Studios put out
this thing where for years conservatives
have been talking about border security
and as a jobs issue and that's what
moderate Republicans still like we
protect our border to protect jobs but
for years leftists and media people have
been saying us just racist you're
disguising your racism and they'll
ignore now this is about jobs
and to the moderate to the normal person
it was about jobs but then Donald Trump
comes on the scene and Donald Trump says
hold up I don't want Mexicans coming
into the country from Mexico because
they're brown and they're not American
and not American means not white but he
doesn't say it because that's like the
one dog whistle you can't say cuz
everything else is out there
if Border Patrol isn't a jobs issue it's
always been a racist issue and and the
white nationalists like Donald Trump and
that the media people have the same job
where they try to tell everyone it's not
a jobs issue it's a race issue all along
because we're racist and we don't like
brown people and the media the media
people tried to have them get off it you
know it's not the media told you it
wasn't a jobs issue so that you would
abandon it because it's really a race
issue but the white nationalist wants to
will tell the
nationalists tells you it's not a jobs
issue because it's a race issue because
they want you to stick it because that's
what you've been doing and they're
counting on your laziness because you
had a thing that you thought mattered
you thought this matter to jobs but in
reality it matters to being racist
against Mexicans who have lived in this
country for a very long time and come
here and work and build it and have done
more work than you and work harder than
you if jobs really mattered to you the
workers would matter to you that's the
other switch that's a switch that hasn't
drawn down it's not jobs that we should
value it's workers workers rights
workers pay is much better than giving a
company a tax break for jobs the vaguest
thing in the world
jobs doesn't matter workers matter the
border doesn't matter being
compassionate to people in need matters
thanking people for working with us
matters and in this way this is why I
think YouTube matters this is why
sharing ideas matter this is why empathy
matters this is why people matter this
is why it matters that we push back when
people say that they're a nihilist or
that people should be nihilist or that
nothing matters
because it's an assault on reality and
what it leads to is Nazis and what it
leads to is these racists getting what
they want and I never want them to get
what they want because it's hateful and
it denies people that matter it denies
people's personhood this is a big deal
and I hope this video was a little bit
fun but also you have to do more than
one thing if you want to change the
world and sometimes a video has to be
out more than one topic and sometimes it
can jump from one thing to another I
want to have fun and I want to be weird
but I don't want to keep my eyes on
things that matter
john seymour my writing I write fiction
it's pretty good it's really good you're
missing out go to patreon where it's
there's links watch some other videos
there all along these lines I'm pretty
great you're welcome if you watch it
this long hit that like button cuz you
should the like button it helps the
video apparently and also share this
video because that helps it more turn on
your Facebook share it on your Twitter
tell people to watch it and if your
opinion matters to them then they will
and then your homework will be to your
homework will be to really read things
by people that matter to you to really
let them know that they matter by
hearing what they say and comprehending
and asking questions
Will you help me?
