“You’ll never —”
For talk show host Alex Jones,
the revolution starts
not with a bang,
or a whimper,
but with Tangy Tangerine.
“You know, many
revolutionaries
rob banks and things, and
kidnap people for funds.
We promote in the
free market the products
we use that are
about preparedness.
That’s how we fund
this revolution
against the
new world order.”
Like a burly carnival barker,
he once boasted
that Tangy Tangerine
weight loss supplements
allowed him to shed
37 pounds in
just two months.
It’s just one of
the products Jones
has hawked in the past to fund
his media empire, Infowars,
and to bankroll his,
at times, lavish lifestyle.
Today, he sells a
number of items,
ranging from freeze dryers
to so-called
testosterone boosters
for men in need of a
little something extra
to fight the
globalist agenda.
And don’t forget
the fish oil.
“You ever seen fish oil
look like that —
no, you’ve never
seen that, have you?
Just like our information
is dynamite,
so are our products,
infowarsstore.com.”
In 2014, Jones’s
business had revenues
of more than $20 million.
What’s made Jones
a millionaire
is his ability to merge
his bizarre claims
with his merchandise.
The apocalypse
requires products
that the Infowars store
can readily supply.
His customers buy in,
and then they buy.
“The globalists, obviously,
are hitting us
through our water.
It’s time to take
control of our lives.
It’s time to not give
our children and families
these poisons.”
Jones touts the
coming Armageddon.
Conveniently, he also sells
body armor and components
for homemade guns.
“You’ve pissed in the face
of the globalists that
don’t want us to be able
to defend ourselves.
You’ve supported
the infowar.
You basically have made
America great again,
so thank you all
for your support.
Limited editions
available right now.”
Jones, and others who
help peddle his products,
like chiropractor
Edward Group,
accuse the government
of putting fluoride
in drinking water, knowing
it was a deadly poison.
“Dumbing the population down,
you’re easily controllable,
and they can also —”
“They’re cutting us off
from higher consciousness.”
And thus, Jones will sell
you fluoride-free toothpaste
laced with
counteractive iodine.
If the struggle
against the ‘deep state’
is getting you down —
“I can’t handle it anymore.”
— there’s Super Male Vitality
for aging men.
“With Dr. Group’s help,
we have developed
the ultimate
male vitality supplement.
This is the answer
to the globalist war
on male vitality with
the estrogen mimickers
they’ve added to the
food and the water supply.”
“Oh, my God!”
But all that prowess
comes at a cost.
“Shut this down!
This is not safe!”
Documents show Jones has
sold at a 20 percent markup.
Where he bought it for
around $15, he sells it
for around $70.
(On sale now.)
The millions of dollars
his fans have
spent on his products have
made Jones a wealthy man.
But his vitriolic rhetoric —
“… have their battle
rifles and everything
ready at their bedsides."
— and crackpot theories,
like that the Sandy Hook
school shooting
was a hoax,
have gotten
him kicked off of
Facebook and YouTube
and resulted in
various lawsuits.
Most recently,
Twitter has permanently
banned Jones and Infowars
for violating their 
abusive behavior policy.
Despite these setbacks,
Jones continues
to seethe against the
machine, presumably
not without the help of his
survival shield formula.
