Any state rank holders, university toppers, gold medal winners in the house?
Very Good. I thought so. Had you got all that, why would you be here?
You’d be busy during weekend also with some research
All that I did was to buy “Gold Winner” oil for my mom
I was never a gold medal winner
Our parents always pressured us a lot to study well
Our house had 2 kids
Me - the elder son, My brother - the younger son and our neighbor - my comparison
His name was Balaji
My mom always said, look at Balaji he got 95 in every subject
The worst part is, they say the same thing in Balaji’s house also “GK got 95 in every subject”
My dad usually wakes up in the middle of the night to use the restroom.
In my 12th grade, once my dad woke up at 2 AM to use the restroom
My bad luck, Balaji also woke up around the same time to use the restroom
He switched on the light in his room, his house and went to use the restroom
My dad noticed the light ON in our neighbor’s house
Next day morning he woke me up and said “Look at Balaji he is preparing for exams till 2 AM”
Dad, how do you know if he is preparing or peeing?
I don’t care. From today, even you wake up and pee!
Dad, your comparison just got badder and bladder!
Amidst all these pressures, my 12th board exams arrived
It was already last minute preparation, so I put my books away and slept
Next day morning, I was looking around for my ‘hall ticket’ and couldn’t find it
Turns out that my ‘hall ticket’ had taken a ticket from the hall to the Pooja room, courtesy of my mom
Ironical isn’t it? Throughout the year, you keep your children on their feet and finally make them fall at God’s feet!
In the hope that I write my exam with fire, she kept camphor, turmeric and kumkum on the hall ticket
Beneath these decorations, my hall ticket transformed into a small ticket
Looking at my own picture on the hall ticket with the kumkum, this looked like my ticket to heaven
In that half ticket, my mom put some Kumkum and I took it to the exam
There are 2 types of students who write exams
One is like Thalaivar Rajinikanth
Whatever is the question, the answer will be short and crisp
If they don't know the answer to anything, they'll say "God is on our side" and walk away
The 2nd category of students are like Kamal Hassan
There will be a question
Nobody will understand the answer these guys write
It will be a simple 2 mark question “What is Moore’s law?”
They will get ready after seeing the question
 Are you asking about Moore’s law?
Moore’s law is a good law
They’ll start like that and for 2 marks itself they’ll write 20 pages
But students who write long, irrelevant answers like this
will use black, red, green pens to highlight and color,
transforming the whole paper into a Holi paper
After writing pages and pages of answer
They’ll write PTO - Please Turn Over on every single page
Hey, you’ve given tons of paper, won’t they know how to turn the paper
If you don’t write PTO, will they forget to turn?
These guys are looking for ways to attract
But only these guys will score well at the end
After finishing your exam, when you come out, there is a danger zone
You should never go there
The place where they discuss answers
They’ll be discussing “For the 10 mark question, is the answer 520 or 524?”
We would silently walk in the other direction
Hey GK, is the answer 520 or 524?
We would have got the answer as 32
Our answer won’t even be close to what these guys are talking
And in our minds we would have been very confident with only that one answer
Wow!! 32!! I cracked that and got it right!
They’ll crack our confidence just like that
If you had failed, they’ll throw the answer sheet on your face
What is the first thing we all do when we get our answer sheets?
Only Indian students do this
Total Mistake!! Will there be a total mistake?
Folks who’ve scored 90-95 will sit quietly
With a total of 14 marks, “Mam, total mistake”
Mam, I’ve got 2 marks less
Mam: 14 itself is less
Mam: If I give you those 2 extra marks, are you going to go and get a seat in IIT?
Mam, Mam, please 2 marks
She’ll count and say, 14 is correct
Mam, you missed a 2 at the top. That is actually a swastika
