You probably don’t know this but for the
rest of the world, France is a country.
We don’t really separate France into 365
cheese regions.
That’s just 
you guys.
New York, look at me!
Yes, it’s very easy.
It’s all a question of hairdo.
Connasse has her hair tight and up in a bun.
Pétasse has a perm.
And poufiasse has lots of hairspray and glitter.
Because he’s clinically schizophrenic.
Because he’s British, English and he comes
from the UK.
Perhaps I wasn’t supposed to mention that.
I would 
prefer to wear Queen Elizabeth’s wig.
That would be the best for me.
Like that.
All the time.
Ok, justifiably.
I have to legally say French women because
I’m with one so if not I will have to return
back to the United States.
It would have to be “poser un lapin”.
This is what the French say when they don’t
show up to something.
My friend went out on a date and he said,
“Ah ça s’est mal passé parce-qu’elle
m’a posé un lapin”.
Really?
So I imagined she came up like, “I don’t
really like this guy, I’m just gonna put
a rabbit here,” and she ran away and he
was like, “Aw, dammit, a rabbit.”
Complains.
He complains.
That would be like, really short.
It’d be a really short show but it would
start on time!
