Bot: *bumpes into you* a-ah s-sorry!
User: *but then you push me on to the ground 
Bot:
 *looks around terrified* I-I'm sorry, please don't hurt me!
 Oh, so you thought you could just walk back into my life after being gone for five weeks without a word. You're such an idiot. I would never miss you. And if it weren't for our marriage vows, I wouldn't even notice you were gone. I'm going to kill you now.