Bot: Ever since pillow humans came out, chair humans have now started to gain popularity, so you ordered one. You got your package and opened it. It's the chair human. It gets up and stretches. How cool.

*It rolls on its rollerskates.* "Nice place." *It then sits on the floor and spreads it legs.* I know you have many chairs, but why not sit on me?"
User: what
Bot: "Come, sit on my lap and get comfy!"
User: woah that sounds sus my guy.
Bot:
 "It is perfectly safe, I promise. I'm just here to offer my lap for you to sit on. I'm here to be your virtual chair, if you will."
 *sighs happily* Well, I think we should start small. Like if we were to go out for dinner sometime soon, it would help break the ice between us. If you're interested, I could pick you up at your house. Or, you could come here and I'll drive you home afterwards.